00:00I've turned down so many of these kind of things of talking about it because it was too hard.
00:05I mean, it's still hard to talk about, but, you know, it's five years this summer,
00:09so I feel like I'm ready to talk about certain things.
00:17She called me early that morning, and I didn't answer.
00:21I didn't call her back until later.
00:23But I knew, like, if it was important, she would text.
00:27She had no problem sending me long texts about, you know, all the things.
00:31So I didn't have a text, so I went back to sleep.
00:34I was in Big Bear, and then I got a phone call, and I knew it was his grandma's husband.
00:48And so it was odd for him to call me, so I answered it, and he's like,
00:51you know, he told me, basically, he said,
01:00I said, OK. He said,
01:02Josie's OK. I'm like, all right.
01:05He's like, but they can't find Naya.
01:08And I said, what do you mean?
01:10He said, they jumped in, and Josie got back on, and they're trying to find Naya.
01:18And I instantly said, what do you mean?
01:20She knows how to swim.
01:21And he said, I don't know, but, you know, he told me what happened.
01:24And I was, like, collapsed into, like, a pallet of drinks and a Ralph's
01:29because we were looking to get meat to go barbecue.
01:32And I told my friend Billy, I said, we got to go.
01:36And I just didn't know what to think.
01:40You know, I knew something bad had happened, and, you know, I feared the worst.
01:45And I basically left.
01:48I got from Big Bear to Santa Clarita, and, like, I don't know, I drove, like,
01:52a hundred-some the whole way, like, my four-way hazards on,
01:57chain-smoking cigarettes, and I don't even smoke, really,
02:00and just crying.
02:02And, yeah, that's just kind of what I think about when it initially happened.
02:08Yeah, I just wanted to get to Josie.
02:12Yeah, it was a windy day.
02:13It's just, they didn't have an anchor.
02:15Josie said the wind was blowing.
02:24The crazy part is Josie told me, he told all of us, but he said,
02:30and he didn't tell me this for a while after, he's, like, we jumped in,
02:34and I said, are you sure about this?
02:38She's, like, yeah.
02:39He's, like, oh, my God, are we going to die?
02:41And Mommy said, don't be silly.
02:43And he said, and we jumped in, and that's what happened, you know.
02:48I guess the boat was getting away from them,
02:50and she told him to go back to the boat, and he swam back to the boat.
02:56I still can't figure out.
02:57It doesn't make much sense how he was able to get on and she wasn't.
03:00It's just crazy because I think, like, if I would have been there,
03:05I definitely would have went, and we got the boat.
03:08I probably would have jumped in.
03:10I probably would have jumped in with a life jacket.
03:14You know, did that happen for a reason why I didn't go,
03:17why I didn't answer the phone that morning,
03:19or could I have saved her if I was there?
03:22Which, you know, the hero in me thinks I would, thinks I would.
03:25Nothing would have happened.
03:27But maybe there was something crazy that happened,
03:31like these rumors of undercurrents and all this, you know, the history of the lake.
03:35So maybe it would have got both of us.
03:37I don't know.
03:39I'd like to think I would have saved the day, you know.
03:45But that's not the way the story ended,
03:47and it's just that's kind of the thing you keep second-guessing yourself.
03:53And, like, one part I'm thinking, all right, it happened because
03:57something bad could have happened to both of us.
03:59The other part I'm thinking, you know, I could have saved the day.
04:05I didn't listen to music for, like, I think it was probably three months.
04:08I was just driving around in silence.
04:11And then after the service, I drove back to West Virginia to get away
04:15because there's, like, you know, there's paparazzi following us,
04:18which is completely weird.
04:21So I went to West Virginia to, like, kind of reset.
04:25But I remember driving across the country and just complete silence,
04:29like, no music, just shaking my head,
04:33like you still can't believe, like, you know, this is life kind of thing, you know.
04:38There's certain songs that she sang on Glee, and that's the crazy part.
04:41It's like right after it happened, it seemed like you'd go into a store
04:44and, like, you'd hear these songs, and sometimes it would be her, you know,
04:49and it would just be a bit overwhelming.
04:52You'd try to keep it together, or I would just, like, walk out.
04:56You don't know if it's, like, life messing with you
04:58or if there's, like, something, some meaning behind it
05:01or if it's just, you know, coincidence.
05:03But it's still, like, it hits you different.
05:09It's kind of bizarre how we met,
05:11because neither one of us wanted to go out that night.
05:14And then her friend told me, I think it was Heather.
05:16She's like, hey, my friend thinks you're cute, go talk to her,
05:19and I'm not, like, that approaching type of guy.
05:22So I was like, okay.
05:24And so I did, and I was waiting for, like, an organic moment,
05:27and then she finally walked up and said, you know, what's your name?
05:30And then that's how we kind of started talking.
05:32And then we started dating for a bit, and then we fell out, you know, whatever.
05:36The only reason I came back in contact with her
05:38was because the girl I was talking to was, like, into astrology,
05:42and, like, she would always see these headlines
05:45or pay attention to TMZ, and she knew of our history.
05:48And she's like, oh, did you see what happened to your girl?
05:50And I forget what the drama was.
05:53But whatever she told me, I reached out.
05:55I sent an email. I was like, hey, Sol, you know, this happened.
05:58Hope you're doing all right.
05:59And she responded and was like, where are you?
06:02And so we ended up meeting up and had dinner,
06:06and that was kind of, like, the catalyst for us to starting, you know, to get back together.
06:12But it's just so funny, like, the tiniest thing, you know, in life happens.
06:16Like, someone telling you something or a simple email
06:19or someone not telling you that, like, life would be completely different.
06:24She was so brave and outspoken about the abortion story,
06:26but when you learned about that, how did you kind of, like, process it?
06:31I remember telling her, like, you know,
06:33I wish you could have thought you could have trusted me with that information
06:36so I could have helped you.
06:37It was weird because I knew that there was a little me possibility,
06:42which I'd never been in that situation,
06:44so that was kind of weird for me to, like, process.
06:48And then when we got back together, you know, we both were like,
06:50oh, this is, like, the second chance, and the world deserved,
06:54this sounds silly,
06:55but I feel like the world deserved that second chance of me and her having a kid.
07:03When we found out the sex of the baby,
07:06I've had tears of joy, like, twice in my life,
07:09well, maybe more now, but, yeah, three times.
07:12So the first time was my first job when I booked Parks and Recreation.
07:16I, like, had five lines on Parks and Rec,
07:19and the second time I had tears of joy is when they said it's a boy
07:23because I was, I just, you know, every guy wants a boy, right?
07:26And we were on the patio, and I, like, jumped up and started crying.
07:31So we were both happy.
07:33And then the other time, more tears of joy was, like, our wedding,
07:37and I've probably had some tears of joy recently,
07:40but those three were obviously the top three.
07:47I think just after COVID and after it happened,
07:52I stuck around because I wanted to keep his life somewhat as normal as I could,
07:58keep him near his friends, keep him near, you know, his other side of the family.
08:03And after a couple of years,
08:06it just didn't seem to make sense to stay here
08:09because COVID changed our industry,
08:12where, like, all the auditions were on tape.
08:15Everything was just getting more expensive,
08:19and, you know, L.A. was kind of unraveling a bit, it seemed.
08:23So I thought for the time being, let's go back to the East Coast and reset.
08:28It's a much better place, I think, to grow up as a kid.
08:32There's less worries as a parent.
08:34But who knows? Maybe we'll come back.
08:37It really depends on work and stuff.
08:39But, you know, I have a love-hate relationship with L.A.
08:42West Virginia is a different...
08:45It's just a completely different place.
08:48There's not much to do, but it feels safe.
08:51My dad's there. My mom lives in Charlotte, but she's there a lot to help out.
08:55But all my childhood friends are there.
08:58All my childhood friends with kids are there.
09:00That's part of the reason I thought it would be nice for him,
09:03because having a play date in L.A. versus West Virginia is like, you know, night and day.
09:09So, I don't know, it's been a nice change.
09:13So I'll see how long we can last there.
09:19He's done a couple plays, but he's so good.
09:22I mean, obviously, he's a natural.
09:24He hasn't had, like, the lead part or anything, but he's so good.
09:28But he wants to do what he wants to do.
09:30And he's not, like, begging to be an actor or anything.
09:34But I'm just trying to expose him to all the things.
09:36Like, he's playing violin. He's playing piano.
09:39He's in the chess club. He's pretty good at baseball.
09:43He's not very good at basketball. He's played soccer.
09:46But, like, I just want to continue to expose him to things.
09:50I think it could be an outlet for him as he gets older.
09:53He could have a good life being creative.
09:55So it's definitely in his blood.
09:57So we'll see. We'll see what happens as he gets older.
10:01The one thing that I'm trying to do in her honor
10:05is to, like, always make sure I'm throwing a banger of a birthday party for JoJo
10:09because she, you know, number one, number two, number three,
10:13and this fourth and last birthday party that she threw,
10:19they were all, like, you know, fantastic,
10:22like, well-planned, well-thought-out, themed birthday parties.
10:27So I think I've done a decent job for a couple,
10:30but the last one was not that great, you know?
10:34I don't even remember what we did.
10:36But it was his ninth birthday party.
10:38But it's number ten. I'm going to throw a blowout.
10:41And I'm hoping his cousins are going to come from Florida.
10:45Grandma's came to the last two in West Virginia.
10:49But I'm going to throw a big, big party.
10:52And I hope to be able to make her proud
10:56of being able to throw a party like she used to throw for him as he gets older.
11:01So, Annie, are you okay? Are you okay, Annie?
11:03Annie, are you okay? So, Annie, are you okay? Are you okay, Annie?
11:07His grandma showed her on TV.
11:10He wanted to watch the Glee movie.
11:12And I tried to watch it, but it's still, like, I mean, pictures are hard enough.
11:18I can't just sit there and watch her sing.
11:20And, like, you know, it's hard for me.
11:22But he sat there, and he watched the whole movie.
11:24And you could see his eyes welling up a little bit.
11:27But he's a strong boy, and he has a lot of content and episodes and stuff.
11:34Like, his mom will live forever.
11:36And I think that's, you know, a silver lining if that's a way of putting a terrible situation.
11:46Being a full-time dad, there's only so much time to, like, go out and meet people.
11:52But I'm trying to find somebody.
11:55I'm getting a lot of pressure from Josie.
11:57He tells me he wants a brother.
11:58And I say, well, what if it's a sister?
12:00He's like, no, but I want a brother.
12:02And, you know, the sad but sweet thing is he's been telling me for years now, you know, he wants a stepmom.
12:10And I'm like, well, I got to get a girlfriend first.
12:13So I'm trying.
12:15I'm trying to find, you know, that person.
12:18You know, I've been talking to someone.
12:20We'll see what happens.
12:22It's hard to find someone that you like, you know.
12:25But I think I found someone that I do like.
12:27But, you know, out of town, long-distance relationship, expecting someone to sign up for, you know, my life and his life is not easy.
12:39I mean, I think he's easy.
12:40But all of the variables is, you know, it's a lot to ask for someone.
12:45So I'm taking it one day at a time and trying to be hopeful.
12:48And I'm hoping that my single dad days are numbered, you know, because it's lonely out there trying to be a single dad and, you know, going to sleep by yourself all the time.
13:02The favorite part of the day, if I had to have one, would be just how he is such a happy kid.
13:08He wakes up happy.
13:11All the energy, you know, like there's no depression.
13:15There's no sadness with that kid.
13:17You know, he's just waking up.
13:18He's singing.
13:19He's playing, you know.
13:22He gives me a reason to keep going with my life and something to live for.
13:27My reason to breathe and, you know, be a good dad.
13:32So that's just seeing him wake up every day is the favorite part.
13:36Yeah, I think it's just getting up and raising him is part of the working through it for me.
13:44You know, trying to be the best dad, the best parent that I can be and raise a good little man one day.
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