- 1 year ago
w/ Jono Pryor, Paul Douglas, Kalyani Nagarajan
Category
📺
TVTranscript
00:00I'm a big boy named Guy Montgomery and I've dreamed of hosting a Spelling Bee ever since
00:25I came up with the idea for this show in 2020.
00:29Tonight four fearless comedians will try to impress me and hopefully each other by
00:33breaking words down to their core components, letters of the alphabet in a very specific
00:38order.
00:39I mean you know what spelling is.
00:40At the end of the night I will announce one of them as the best at spelling and they will
00:44walk away with the most sought after prize on prime time, a priority boarding one way
00:49ticket to next week's episode.
00:55In our fourth place speller, which is to say our worst speller, well they will have
01:00a long hard think about what they've done while sitting in the humiliating dunce's corner
01:05wearing the dunce's hat.
01:08A fate worse than death, but I'll tell you what's better than death, it's applauding
01:14politely while greeting familiar faces, let's meet our spellers, they are Paul Duglis, Kalyani
01:21Raji, John O'Brien, and our defending champion all the way from last week, it's Rhys Magnusson.
01:34Alright enough of that, the clamming's getting condescending, let's get spelling.
01:43A cup, a purse, a bucket, you'd think I'd be in possession of a lot of tea, money and
01:48dirty floor water right now, but on the contrary, these three receptacles are filled with words.
01:55The cowards cup is filled with easy to spell words like a and I, actually no those are
02:00probably too easy but you get the idea, they are worth one point.
02:03The person's purse, those are words that persons spell on a day to day basis and you'll get
02:08two points for your efforts.
02:10Finally the bucket of bravery is of course filled with words reserved for only the Einsteins
02:14among us, assuming Einstein was as good at spelling as he was at physics, get one of
02:19those right, you got it, you get E equals MC cubed points, three points.
02:27Our first speller is one of my favourite conversational partners and stand up comedians in the country,
02:32it's Paul Duglis.
02:37And Paul before we get into it, you know I've known you for quite a while, it's a bold new
02:41head with a bold new tone.
02:43Yeah, I've done myself a mischief man, nobody told me that the hair and make-up lady was
02:48straight from an assailant's island.
02:50Like did you have a photo in mind, like what did it?
02:53Nah, I just told her I was pissed off at the manager.
02:57Have you got any memories of spelling in your life at school or as an adult?
03:02Like I was a bit of a middle of the road speller but I do love a typo, whether I'm typoing
03:08or pointing out typos, like I used to BMX because look at me, just one of those dudes.
03:15And the cool kids used to have like helmets and you would write your favourite band on
03:19or even some cool sayings.
03:21And one of the boys rolled up and he'd selected fun loving criminals, except he tragically
03:25decided to swap the second I for an A, so he actually had fun loving crim-anals.
03:33And once he figured that out he basically like every time you talked to him or like
03:36new people rolled up, he kept his head on the move, you know like.
03:41I mean you BMX boys, you had a few laughs about that.
03:45Just a couple.
03:48Well I'm Paul and so nice to have you on the show.
03:51Which receptacle would you like to spell from?
03:53Fool man, this might be the first time I don't go for the bucky.
03:59So I'm going to go for the person's purse, please.
04:01The person's purse?
04:02Yeah.
04:02You got it.
04:04Your word from the person's purse.
04:06Acoustic.
04:08Now before you spell remember you can ask for a language of origin,
04:12a definition and to hear the word in a sentence.
04:15Sentence.
04:17I don't mean to be critical but I think something is lost in the acoustic version
04:21of the Black Eyed Peas boom boom pow.
04:26Can't you hear origin man?
04:27Just because I'm keen to learn.
04:29Language of origin, white men ruining parties.
04:34I reckon I've got it.
04:36A-C-O-U-S-T-I-C.
04:42That is correct.
04:46Well done Paul, two points for yours.
04:49And next to Paul we have a brilliant actor and improviser,
04:52star of Raised by Refugees, it's Kalyani Nagarajah.
04:58Kalyani, you teach at a high school.
05:01You're around teens all day.
05:03Tell me, is being one of the best spellers in school
05:06still a surefire way to be one of the cool kids?
05:09No, absolutely not.
05:11No, they don't respect spelling?
05:12They don't respect spelling, they don't respect people, they don't respect me.
05:16Hence why I quit.
05:17Oh.
05:18Slay.
05:18Congratulations.
05:21We probably shouldn't be applauding the fact that people are leaving the teaching industry.
05:27Why would you leave a cushy profession like teaching?
05:31What do you teach at school?
05:32Drama.
05:33Oh, so you'll be bad at this.
05:34Yes.
05:38I've got the weight of being an educator on my shoulders and I'm going to slay.
05:43I also have like representation of...
05:47Um...
05:50I just, um...
05:52I know, these straight white guys.
05:57To be fair we've had many women of colour on the show so far this season
06:00and they just can't win.
06:03Oh.
06:06Kalyani, it is such a pleasure to have you with us.
06:08Pleasure to be here, thank you.
06:09Which receptacle would you like to spell for us?
06:12Um, I'm going to play it safe and I'm going to go person's purse.
06:15You got it, a word from the person's purse.
06:17Your word from the person's purse is...
06:20Indian.
06:23Orangutan.
06:25Ooh.
06:26What?
06:28That should be in that bucket, man.
06:30Well, if you want to change where the words go, I guess you could write your own show.
06:36Can I have the origin?
06:37The language of origin?
06:38Yeah.
06:39Palm oil.
06:41Orangutan.
06:43Can I do this?
06:44Yeah, your body, your choice, man.
06:46Right, thank you.
06:46O-R-A-N-O-R-A-N-G-A-T-A-N-G-E-V-X-T-W-N.
07:06Yeah, that is incorrect.
07:08Orangutan is spelt O-R-A-N-G-U-T-A-N.
07:14Thank you so much.
07:14Sorry, no points awarded, but great to have you on the show.
07:17Our next contestant is known for his pranks, so he'll know more than anyone.
07:21There's no greater prankster than the rules of the English language.
07:25It's Jono Pryor!
07:29Jono, it's crazy to think that when I was in high school,
07:32I rang you up and answered a question on air, and I won an Op Shop CD,
07:37and then you sent that Op Shop CD to my house, and I listened to it.
07:41That is still, to this day, one of your greatest pranks.
07:48Do you have any other dastardly pranks you're planning on air tonight?
07:51No dastardly. Honestly, this is a true story.
07:53I was walking here out of the house tonight, and I said to my wife,
07:57Jen, you know, if I win this thing, I'm required for another episode,
08:01the carryover episode, and she's like, that's not going to be an issue.
08:05Don't even kid yourself.
08:07So you're a self-confessed bad speller.
08:09Terrible speller. Morbid fear of spelling, and I'm allergic to bee,
08:13so spelling bee is honestly...
08:14It's a dangerous place to be.
08:15It's a dangerous place to be, yeah.
08:17I've got to tell you, I had the inside word that you're bad at spelling.
08:19A lot of my friends worked with you for a long time on Jono and Ben,
08:23and all of them, when I told them you were doing this show,
08:25said that you are one of the worst spellers they've ever come across.
08:33What receptacle will you be spelling from?
08:35Go hard or go home, my friend.
08:37You serious?
08:37Yeah, I'm going for the bucket, mate.
08:42And from the bucket of bravery, your word is...
08:46Veterinarian.
08:49You can ask for a language of origin, a definition,
08:51or to hear the word in a sentence.
08:53I'll have all three of those.
08:54OK, language of origin, the animal kingdom.
08:57Definition, a highly paid dogner who you must pay over $1,000
09:02to kill one of your beloved family members.
09:05In a sentence, if there are any veterinarians in the house tonight,
09:11please find me after the show,
09:13as my horse is in desperate need of a large amount of ketamine.
09:21Veterinarian, OK.
09:22Veterinarian.
09:24Just because when you said it to yourself, you said it wrong.
09:26OK.
09:30V
09:32E
09:33T
09:35E
09:37R
09:39I
09:40A-N-I-A-N.
09:44You started so well.
09:47I was genuine, I was in disbelief.
09:49Can I have another go?
09:51Because I feel like you're about to say I didn't spell it right.
09:54Yeah, because you made an absolute meal of it.
09:57That is incorrect.
09:59Veterinarian is spelt V-E-T-E-R-I-N-A-R-I-A-N.
10:05I don't know what you expected.
10:07It was a really bad choice for you.
10:10Finally, our champion from last week.
10:12I'm getting sick of the sight of him.
10:13It's Rhys Benducy!
10:18Rhys, it's never been done before.
10:20This is our second season.
10:22Twice we had two spellers win two episodes on the trot.
10:25No one has won the elusive third episode.
10:27How are you feeling?
10:28I'm feeling good.
10:29I'm a different man.
10:30You said last week you were a different man from the week before.
10:32I'm a different man again.
10:34The first time you win, people down the street, they say it's a fluke.
10:37They say you can't get the job done.
10:39But the second time, that's when things start to change, guy.
10:42Babies are kissing me in the street.
10:45I went to my therapist.
10:47They said, don't come back.
10:48You're cured.
10:50So thank you for this opportunity.
10:52It's a pleasure to have you back.
10:53I think you're a real chance tonight.
10:54Which receptacle will you be spelling from?
10:56Bucket of Bravery.
10:57Okay.
11:02Your word from the Bucket of Bravery is Lackadaisical.
11:10Can I please have the language of origin?
11:13The couch.
11:17And can I have it in a sentence?
11:18Lackadaisical is the most high effort way of saying lazy.
11:23Lackadaisical.
11:24L-A-C-K-A-D-A-I-S-I-C-A-L.
11:30That is correct.
11:33And the people love it.
11:36It's been a round full of points.
11:38And in some cases, no points.
11:39And Rhys takes the early lead.
11:41I've got to say though, in that last round, some of you were spelling poorly.
11:45So we're going to play a little game that involves spelling well.
11:47I suppose you're all wondering where I get my words.
11:54And I'm ready to reveal my secret.
11:56I source them from the spelling well.
12:00In this round, my trusted assistant Sanjay will say a word from the well and wait.
12:04Actually, wait a second.
12:05Where is Sanjay?
12:11Oh no, Sanjay's only gone and fallen down the spelling well.
12:15He was probably leaning over the ledge to try and get an extra good peek.
12:18Sanjay, are you okay down there?
12:27Okay, well, you know what?
12:28I would love to come and rescue you, but we've really got to stick with the segment.
12:33I think we can still make it work.
12:37Sanjay is going to read a word from the spelling well.
12:41And your job will be to decipher and spell the word.
12:46Are you ready, Sanjay?
12:54All right, that is your word.
12:56You have one ad break to spell it.
12:58In the meantime, I'm going to save Sanjay.
12:59We'll see you soon after the ad break.
13:15Welcome back to Guy Montgomery's Guy on Spelling Bee.
13:21This week's episode is sponsored by M&N's.
13:24Yes, I said M&N's.
13:27It's the colourful candy with slightly more letter variation than their rivals, who we shall not name.
13:34Anyway, you'll be pleased to hear that we rescued Sanjay from down the well during the break.
13:41Sanjay, you were screaming a word from down in the well.
13:44It was up to our spellers to spell it and let's have a look at how they did.
13:48Paul, what have you written?
13:50Ooh.
13:53So you just went straight down the line.
13:55Sensible answer.
13:56What do you think he was yelling?
13:57Ooh.
13:58I immediately regret my decision.
14:01I'm hot.
14:02Yeah.
14:04I know.
14:06All right, thank you.
14:07Paul Kaliani, what have you written down?
14:09I had a meltdown.
14:11Um, so I originally thought Sanjay.
14:15Like he's screaming his name.
14:16And then I thought I'm in a well.
14:19But there's too many lines.
14:20And so then I went back to Sanjay and then I wrote this one.
14:23So the answer you're submitting is Sanjay.
14:26Sanjay.
14:27Okay, thank you very much, Kaliani.
14:28Jono, what have you done?
14:29Well, Sanjay, you look remarkably unaffected for a man who's just been down a well.
14:34Wim Hof.
14:36And then I've also realised I might have spelt Wim incorrectly.
14:42Is he W-I-M?
14:43Wim Hof?
14:44I don't know who Wim Hof is.
14:45He's the Dutch bloke with the ice bar.
14:47Yeah.
14:49So you think he's yelling out Wim Hof method when he's trapped down a well?
14:54It's an option.
14:54For what it's worth, now I know who you're talking about.
14:56It's spelled W-I-M-H-O-F.
14:58So it's no good twice.
15:02Thank you very much, Jono.
15:03And Rhys, what have you done?
15:04I thought he said wolf, but because it was only four letters, I had a bit of extra time.
15:09So I drew a wolf standing on top of a mountain howling at the moon.
15:14Pretty shit drawing.
15:16Appreciate the effort, everyone.
15:18You've done your best.
15:19Sanjay, it's time to find out.
15:20What word were you saying?
15:22Help.
15:22Yeah, I thought it was pretty obvious, too.
15:28Man, lot of good you all were.
15:29Just stood there writing down random words while Sanjay was crying out for help.
15:33No points to anyone.
15:35Now, they say the best things in life are free, but that doesn't apply in this next round.
15:44Money, money, money.
15:46Invented by Abba in 1976, money is now the centre of the global economy.
15:52I love it, you love it, and no one loves it more than my trusted accountant,
15:55the recently rescued Sanjay Patel.
16:00How are you going there, Sanjay?
16:02Well, I'm actually a bit short on money.
16:04I had to spend it all on a machine that dry cleans my suit in 30 seconds.
16:09Why would you spend your money on that?
16:10My suit got wet.
16:11How'd your suit get wet?
16:12I fell down a well.
16:15Yes, you did.
16:16I'd forgotten all about it.
16:18In this round, I have all forms of physical currency from Aotearoa on our board,
16:22from the humble 10 cent piece to the big burly $100 bill.
16:27Each of you must select a value of currency
16:30and spell a word associated with the note or coin.
16:33We'll go down the line and each of you will have an opportunity to spell a word.
16:36Get your word right, you get a point.
16:38Get it wrong, you will have the value of your selected denomination
16:42deducted from your paycheck.
16:46Legit.
16:48You can ask for a definition, to hear it in a sentence,
16:51or what I'm going to spend the money on if you get it wrong.
16:54And we will start with Rhys.
16:56I'll play conservative.
16:59I'll take the $10 note, please.
17:02$10.
17:03This is an important note because it features Kate Shepherd,
17:06one of New Zealand's leading shepherds.
17:09Seven-time winner of the Golden Shares and Total Smoke Show.
17:14In her spare time, she was also a suffragette, whatever that means.
17:19Your word is suffragette.
17:22Can I please have it in a sentence?
17:25Women who live near the airport and have trouble sleeping
17:28sometimes have to suffragette.
17:32But at least they can sleep easy knowing that they can vote
17:35every election cycle thanks to suffragette Kate Shepherd.
17:43That's good stuff.
17:44Um, S.
17:45Actually, can you ask me for the definition too?
17:48Have you got a joke that you'd like to do?
17:50Yeah, I think I do.
17:51Oh, Guy, what's the definition?
17:55Pioneers of feminism, before the mantle was taken from them
17:58by noted allies such as Guy Montgomery.
18:05Worth it.
18:08Suffragette is
18:11S-U-F-F-R-A-G-E-T-T-E.
18:22That is correct!
18:26Well done, Rhys.
18:29Jono, you've had a long career in New Zealand show business.
18:32Surely you're ready to lose some money.
18:35We're locking in the red Rutherford, my friend.
18:38Oh my gosh, the biggest one there is.
18:41I've got nothing to lose.
18:42Save for $100.
18:45Whoa, Nelly!
18:47When you've got one of these big bores in your wallet,
18:49you know you could almost leave your house for the day
18:51without running at a loss.
18:53And on the note is Lord Ernest Rutherford,
18:56a man who is indirectly responsible
18:58for Christopher Nolan's Oppenheimer.
19:02Because he split the atom.
19:05Your word is atom.
19:10A-T-O-M-E.
19:17That is correct!
19:21Jono's on the board with one point for spelling atom.
19:27Kalyani, will you be losing money or gaining money?
19:30No, sorry, points.
19:32There's no way.
19:33I've lost money anyway.
19:34Have you?
19:35Yeah.
19:35How'd you lose money?
19:36By being a teacher constantly.
19:40Damn, it hurts because it's true.
19:42It's true!
19:43Um, I will take Hilary.
19:46You've picked $5.
19:48The cheap and cheerful note that isn't too full of itself.
19:52But I've got bad news for you.
19:53The note you see before you was actually printed off
19:56by our art department and is not the real thing.
19:59Your word is counterfeit.
20:03This game is rigged, man!
20:06Um, what are you going to spend the money on
20:07if I spell it incorrectly?
20:09A flat white, but not with alternative milks
20:11and not from an airport.
20:14Counterfeit.
20:16There's something in the fit.
20:17Yeah, there is.
20:18There's something in the fit, eh?
20:19Actually, don't ask me.
20:23C-O-U-N-T-E-R.
20:31I've already screwed it, haven't I?
20:32No, no, you're doing well.
20:35Is she doing well, guy?
20:37I before E except after C.
20:39F-I-E-T?
20:41That is incorrect.
20:43What do you mean?
20:43What do you mean?
20:44What do you mean?
20:44What do you mean?
20:45It's not as popular, but it's also
20:47I before E except after F.
20:51Counterfeit is C-O-U-N-T-E-R-F-E-I-T.
20:57That's what I said!
20:57That's what I said!
20:58Nah, you chucked an E in there.
20:59Nah, that's what I said!
21:01Nah, you got it wrong.
21:02I got it wrong?
21:04Paul, options are getting limited.
21:06Well, not really.
21:06There's still quite a lot on there.
21:07Uh, what are you going to go with?
21:09A hundred dollar was super easy.
21:11I'm so curious.
21:13Ten cents, man.
21:13What is it?
21:15You have selected ten cents,
21:17the lowest denomination of physical currency in New Zealand.
21:21The ten cent piece was first minted in 1967,
21:24replacing the shilling.
21:25You already know this,
21:26but the original ten cent piece
21:27was of course made from cupra nickel.
21:30So it goes without saying that your word is cupra nickel.
21:39You were like, oh, the big notes are easy.
21:41I'm going to go for the smallest denomination.
21:44Can you run that word back by me?
21:46Cupra nickel.
21:47Can I get a definition, please, guy?
21:49The stuff they made the ten cent piece out of.
21:52I just told you, idiot.
21:56Say the word one more time for me.
21:58Cupra nickel.
21:59Yeah.
22:00C-U-P-R-E-R-N-I-C-K-L-E.
22:08That is incorrect.
22:11Cupra nickel is spelled C-U-P-R-O-N-I-C-K-E-L.
22:17Wow.
22:18What an informative round.
22:19Rhys is out in front,
22:20both in points and financially.
22:22And after that round,
22:23it looks like I'm going to be entering a whole new tax bracket.
22:25I need to go and crunch some numbers.
22:27You at home can lose some money too
22:28by buying things you see on the ads.
22:30We'll see you right after this
22:31with more Government Spelling Bee.
22:41We're back and so are you.
22:43Now, I know most of you at home
22:45are enjoying the variety of entertaining personalities
22:47and wittier sides on this show,
22:49but I also know for a fact
22:50that some of you are watching this and thinking,
22:52shut up and spell.
22:58And this is Shut Up and Spell,
23:00a cool and edgy name for a round,
23:02but let's be honest,
23:03it's a bit of a weird name for a show.
23:05It's a bit of a weird name for a show.
23:06It's a bit of a weird name for a show.
23:08It's a bit of a weird name for a show.
23:09But let's be honest, it's just charades.
23:11In this round, you'll work in teams of two
23:13to play everyone's least favourite parlour game.
23:16Paul and Kalyani, you're a team
23:17because you're the two people closest to me.
23:19Jono and Rhys, I've put you together
23:21because I don't know you
23:22and you're both further away from me.
23:24Each individual player will be given a list
23:26of 10 words to perform silently.
23:28Your partner must guess the word you are acting out
23:31and then submit their guess in the form of spelling.
23:33You may only move on to the next word on your list
23:36if the word is spelled correctly.
23:38Each player has until I ring my bell
23:40to get through as many of the lists as possible.
23:43For each word correctly spelled,
23:44the performer and the speller will receive a point each.
23:47Kalyani, you are a well-respected actor
23:49with over three credits on IMDb,
23:51so you can go first.
23:55Paul, you'll be guessing.
23:57To the whole panel, are there any questions
23:59you'd like to ask before the round commences?
24:01Yeah, one springs to mind.
24:03Say, hypothetically, you're over there
24:06charading your little tush off
24:08and your team-mate is a bad speller.
24:13What then?
24:16I imagine that'd be pretty frustrating.
24:20How does that feel for team morale, John?
24:21Is it nice to hear your team-mate being like,
24:23hey, what happens if you pair with a real piece of shit?
24:27It's the same thing my wife said to me
24:28as I walk out of the house.
24:30This is personal now, guy.
24:32This is about redemption.
24:34OK.
24:36What sort of redemption are we talking about?
24:38Don't follow up questions.
24:41Who are we going to ask what sort of redemption?
24:43I guess if someone said this is about redemption,
24:45a reasonable follow-up question might be,
24:47what sort of redemption?
24:51You guys should do a podcast.
25:01Yeah, um, f*** you, Paul.
25:03OK.
25:05Kalyani, please take your word list.
25:07OK.
25:08Walk to your performance area.
25:09OK.
25:11Kalyani, are you ready?
25:12Yes.
25:13Paul, are you ready?
25:14Oh, yeah.
25:16Team attire!
25:17Go, that means go.
25:19One word.
25:21The syllable, second syllable.
25:22First syllable.
25:23T, t, t, brush, bruh, bruh, bruh, toothbrush.
25:29Toothbrush.
25:29Spell it!
25:33There's a title!
25:33B-double-O!
25:35T-H, B-R-U-S-H.
25:38Correct.
25:40Kek.
25:41First word.
25:42Karate.
25:43K-A-R-A-T-E.
25:45Correct.
25:47Nose.
25:48Pongi.
25:49H-O-N-G-I.
25:51Correct.
25:51Um, OK.
25:58The word!
26:01Your time is up.
26:04It's a very good effort.
26:05Please make your way back to the podium.
26:10OK, well done, Kalyani and Paul.
26:11You both get three points.
26:12So, Paul, you're now in five.
26:13Kalyani, welcome to Scoreboard with three points.
26:18Jono, you're up.
26:19Please make your way to the performance space
26:21and take this card from me.
26:23You get to spell.
26:24Oh, yeah, we got this.
26:25Are you ready?
26:26Redemption.
26:28Go.
26:29Pfft.
26:31Uh, B-R-E-A-K-D-A-N-C-E.
26:34Incorrect.
26:35B-R-E-A-K-D-A-N-C-E?
26:39Incorrect.
26:43Is it just spin?
26:45Was I right with breakdance?
26:47Am I just spelling it?
26:47Oh, B-R-E-A-K-D-A-N-C-I-N-G.
26:51Correct.
26:55Uh, rowing, canoeing, paddling.
26:59Uh, exploring, sailing, seafaring, river cruise, ship, boat, B-I-T.
27:12Correct.
27:17Well done, Jono.
27:18Well done, Rhys.
27:20That was good, man.
27:21That was on me.
27:21I'm so sorry.
27:22If I was Jono, I'd be asking,
27:23what do you do if your partner's so arrogant
27:25they don't even make sure they've got the word right first?
27:29But that's just me.
27:32Paul, not exactly known for your act outs on stage.
27:35Nothing like practicing on national television.
27:38Head on over to the performance area.
27:42Are you ready?
27:42Yeah, I'm super ready.
27:44You ready?
27:44Yeah, ka pai, let's go.
27:46Your time starts now.
27:48Pregnant.
27:49Pregnant.
27:50Giving birth.
27:50Birth.
27:51Baby.
27:51Baby, B-A-B-Y.
27:53Correct.
27:55Uh, are you sure?
27:57Um, trumpet, trumpet, trumpet, trombone, trombone, trombone, T-R-O-M-B-O-N-E.
28:05Correct.
28:08Angry man, angry, angry man.
28:11Oh, I'm so confused.
28:14No, peace sign, hippie, hippie, hippie, peace man, peace, love, love, soccer, soccer, soccer.
28:22War.
28:25Um, uh, uh, rage guy, uh, right wing, uh, oh, uh, boosh, yeah, yeah, oh, I broke my jaw,
28:35I broke my jaw.
28:38Is it The Rock?
28:40What was it?
28:41We gotta know.
28:42The Rock.
28:45I did a sick people's elbow.
28:49And I think I'm gonna wreck myself.
28:52Oh.
28:55Well done, Paul and Kalyani, two points.
29:00Our final performance is from Rhys, and I don't think you'd be here if this sort of thing made
29:04you nervous.
29:05Are you ready to steal the show?
29:07Shucks, guy, I'll give it a go.
29:11Good on you, bro.
29:13Have fun up there.
29:16Oh, you piece of shit.
29:20Are you ready?
29:21Yep.
29:22Go.
29:23Uh, dinosaur, uh, velociraptor, uh, dragon, vampire, v, uh, vampire, bat, uh,
29:33oh, vamp, uh, eagle, three syllables, three words, three syllables, third syllable,
29:43of a sing, opera, oh, Phantom of the Opera.
29:47Uh, second, second, uh, syllable, pool, q, q, q, barbecue, q, q, first syllable, pool, tug,
30:09q, did pool, q, sing, opera.
30:17No, I have no idea what's happening.
30:20It's like, pool, dead body.
30:25First syllable.
30:26Sounds like?
30:27Pocket, jacket.
30:29Bag.
30:30Bag.
30:31Okay, first syllable sounds like bag.
30:33Drag, drag, q, r, d, r, a, c.
30:41No, no, no, no.
30:47Go back on.
30:48What?
30:55Back to your podium, back to your podium.
31:02Give it up for Rhys and Jono.
31:08Honestly, couldn't have gone better.
31:12There were 40 possible points to give away in that round.
31:15Congratulations on earning 14 of them.
31:17And that's enough silence for now.
31:19Unless you're one of those people who mutes the air brakes,
31:21because that's what we're about to have.
31:23We'll see you soon for more Spelling.
31:40Welcome back to The Game on Spelling Bee.
31:43To those of you who are watching thinking,
31:45hey, isn't broadcast television dying?
31:47Well, don't worry, we hear you.
31:49And that's why we're about to go...
31:52on the internet.
31:58It's the Wi-Fi round.
31:59It's all about Wi-Fi.
32:02As I'm a bit of a technophobe though,
32:03to help me out with this round,
32:04I'm joined by my trusted IT guy, Sanjay Patel.
32:07You will never fully understand the vast and lawless underworld
32:11that is the World Wide Web.
32:15Thank you, Sanjay.
32:16Next to Sanjay are four modems labelled A through D.
32:20Going down the line, each contestant will have to pick a modem
32:23and spell that modem's Wi-Fi password.
32:28If you spell it correctly, you receive a point
32:30and the right to stream and download to your heart's content.
32:33To help you understand the modems,
32:35To help you along, you will be able to ask for the Wi-Fi's network name
32:40and a little about the owners.
32:42Because I'm not a complete maniac,
32:44these passwords are not case sensitive,
32:46although numbers and special characters will have to be clarified.
32:49Are you ready, Sanjay?
32:50I am.
32:53Man, this guy's cool.
32:54OK, Paul, you're up first.
32:56Every modem to choose from, which would you like?
32:58I've got to test something out real quick.
33:03Oh!
33:05Oh!
33:10He's the real deal.
33:13All right.
33:14I mean, like, how do you even...
33:15The frickin', the one that looks like Darth Vader's lair.
33:18Hey!
33:19Sorry, I forgot there was a ladder next to it.
33:21You've selected the CyberLink modem.
33:24Would you like the Wi-Fi name to hear about the owners
33:27or just to hear the password?
33:28The Wi-Fi name.
33:30Boys, boys, boys.
33:31One, two, three.
33:33OK, uh, the owners.
33:35Eddie, Jordan and Raj.
33:37Three guys living in a flat on Bond Street.
33:39They're self-taught DJs who work admin jobs during the week.
33:42They love buying and taking low-grade MDMA.
33:49Their Wi-Fi password.
33:51I'm going to tell you the password.
33:52You just have to spell it.
33:53Oh, sorry, yeah, yeah.
33:54I was straight up just going to throw a password out there.
33:57That's right, I thought the game was...
33:59Yeah, so did I, yeah!
34:00You had to guess the password.
34:01I was going to go up the waz, but that's not my...
34:05What's the password, then?
34:07No girls allowed.
34:10N-O-G-U-R-L-S-A-L-O-U-D.
34:17That is incorrect.
34:19Oh!
34:20Do you like where my head was at, though?
34:23Yeah, it was all right.
34:23No girls allowed is spelt N-O-G-I-R-L-Z-A-L-L-O-W-3-D.
34:31Nice.
34:33Disappointing, man.
34:35Yeah.
34:35I reckon you get along with those guys, OK, though?
34:39Kalyani, three modems left.
34:41Which do you take, B, C, or D?
34:43You can also defer to Sanjay for wisdom.
34:45Yes, my brother.
34:46What do you think for me as your sister?
34:51The one that's not white.
34:53Yes!
34:58I'll pick the one that is not white.
35:00OK, you've selected iPhone 11.
35:03Wi-Fi name?
35:04Susan's iPhone.
35:08Right, Susan's iPhone.
35:09Can I get a little bit about Susan?
35:11Susan, a 34-year-old English teacher at a private all-girls high school
35:15in the eastern suburbs of Auckland, lives with two flatmates.
35:18Hobbies include pottery and cycling.
35:21Sounds boring.
35:24OK, what is the password?
35:26Here you go.
35:27Here you go.
35:30H-E-R-E-U-G-O.
35:36That is incorrect.
35:38Here you go, spelled H-E-R-E-Y-O-U-G-O.
35:46Jono, two modems left.
35:48Which are you going to choose?
35:50What do you reckon, Sanjay?
35:52Maybe B.
35:54I'll go B.
35:57Pretty straightforward there.
35:59You've selected modem, Pinnacle Digital TG532 wireless modem.
36:04Would you like to know the Wi-Fi name, the owner, or the password?
36:07I'd like to know all three, thank you.
36:09The Wi-Fi name, your new Wi-Fi.
36:12Obviously you haven't changed that yet.
36:13The owner, Gavin, a 24-year-old trainer at a 24-hour gym in Mount Roskill.
36:18He's in phenomenal shape, but it has come at the cost of his personal relationships.
36:24The password is V-R-V-9-5-1-7-U-W-A-C-3-4.
36:38V-R-V-9-5-U-7-3-W-8-4.
36:46That is incorrect.
36:48No.
36:49The password is spelt V-R-V-9-5-1-7-U-W-A-C-3-4.
36:55And, you know, something like that.
36:56It's usually on the back of the modem, isn't it, Sanjay?
36:59Yes, right there.
37:01Yeah, you probably should have just gone over and taken a look, mate.
37:05Okay, one modem left.
37:07Rhys, it's all yours.
37:09I'll go modem C, please.
37:11You've selected modem, Nexacore B315S607.
37:16I'd love to know a bit about the owners.
37:18The Rockwell family, husband and wife Greg and Anna,
37:21and their two children, Sarah, 15, and Andrew, 17.
37:24The internet is commonly used for working from home
37:27and downloading terabytes of pornography,
37:30although it is unclear by who.
37:34Okay, can I have the password, please?
37:36Welcome to our home.
37:40W-E-L-L...
37:43I don't want to say this, but...
37:49C-U-M...
37:52The number two...
37:55O-U-R-H-O-M-E.
37:58That is both incorrect and disgusting.
38:03Welcome to our home is spelled W-E-L-C-O-M-E
38:07to the number O-U-R-H-O-M-E.
38:10So you are not welcome at the Rockwell family's house.
38:15The porn was a red herring.
38:17Pretty sure that's illegal.
38:23Well, if anything's going to get young people into watching TV,
38:26it's got to be watching old people
38:28unsuccessfully spell Wi-Fi passwords.
38:30It's time for us all to connect to our Wi-Fi at home
38:33while we doomscroll on our phones during an ad break,
38:35and we'll see you soon for the conclusion
38:37of Diamond Spelling Bee!
38:47MUSIC
38:50CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
38:53Nau mai, piki mai.
38:55Welcome back to my Diamond Spelling Bee.
38:57We are so close to the end,
38:58but the most important thing is not how we got there.
39:00It's who wins or loses.
39:02And we have one more round up our sleeves
39:04to determine just that.
39:06Buzzers at the ready.
39:07MUSIC
39:11It's the buzz round.
39:13Wow!
39:13Bees buzz?
39:15And this show is called Spelling Bees.
39:18Crazy, I only just made the connection.
39:20Anyway, in this round,
39:22I'm going to read out lots of words
39:24based on a single topic at a very zippy pace.
39:28If you think you can spell it, you buzz in.
39:30Get it right, you get a point.
39:31Get it wrong, you lose a point.
39:33As confident as you might be, I must reiterate,
39:36it is extremely possible to throw everything away
39:39in the next few minutes.
39:42Jonno, since life is already pretty tough for you
39:44on the scoreboard,
39:45I'll let you choose tonight's topic
39:47out of the following options.
39:49OK.
39:49Fashion, cars, drinks, or World War II?
39:55World War II.
39:58All right.
40:01Special interest?
40:03Just thought it sounded fun.
40:07Somehow the most insane thing you've said all night?
40:11And so it shall be.
40:13Let's play the buzz round.
40:16Germany.
40:17Go ahead, Rhys.
40:18G-E-R-M-A-N-Y.
40:20Correct.
40:21Naughty.
40:22Go ahead, Jonno.
40:24N-A-U-G-H-T-Y.
40:27Correct.
40:28Moustache.
40:30Go ahead, Rhys.
40:31M-O-U-S-T-A-C-H-E.
40:33Correct.
40:34Mussolini.
40:36Go ahead, Jonno.
40:37M-U-S-S-O-U-L-I-N-I.
40:45Incorrect.
40:47Gun.
40:47Go ahead, Paul.
40:49G-U-N.
40:49Correct.
40:51Bomb.
40:52Go ahead, Kalyani.
40:53B-O-M-B.
40:54Correct.
40:55Allies.
40:56Go ahead, Paul.
40:57A-L-L-I-E-S.
40:59Correct.
41:00Omaha Beach.
41:01Go ahead, Jonno.
41:03O-M-A-H-A-B-E-A-C-H.
41:06Correct.
41:07Saving Private Ryan.
41:08Go ahead, Paul.
41:10S-A-V-I-N-G-P-R-I-V-A-T-E-R-Y-A-N.
41:19Correct.
41:19Treaty of Versailles.
41:21Go ahead, Rhys.
41:24T-R-E-A-T-Y-O-F-V-E-R-S-A-I-L-L-E-S.
41:33Correct.
41:33USSR.
41:35Go ahead, Jonno.
41:36U-S-S-R.
41:38Correct.
41:39Joseph Stalin.
41:40Go ahead, Paul.
41:41J-O-S-E-P-H-S-T-L-I-N.
41:47Incorrect.
41:48Rations.
41:49Go ahead, Rhys.
41:51R-A-T-I-O-N-S.
41:53Correct.
41:54Inglourious Basterds.
41:55Go ahead, Jonno.
41:56I-N-G-L-O-R-I-O-U-S-B-A-S-T-A-R-D-S.
42:10Incorrect.
42:11G-I.
42:12Go ahead, Rhys.
42:12G-I.
42:13Correct.
42:14Goebbels.
42:15Go ahead, Jonno.
42:16G-E-R-B-L-E-I-Z.
42:27Don't worry about it, brother.
42:31Rhys, did you already buzz in?
42:33Your word is Blitzkrieg.
42:37B-L-I-T-Z-K-R-I-E-G.
42:41Correct.
42:42You boys.
42:43Go ahead, Jonno.
42:44U-O-F-F-N-B-O-A-T.
42:48Correct.
42:49Warsaw Pact.
42:50Go ahead, Paul.
42:51W-A-R-S-A-W-P-A-C-T.
42:55Correct.
42:56Soup.
42:57Go ahead, Rhys.
42:58S-O-U-P.
42:59Correct.
43:02And we have a clear-cut champion for today
43:05and a record-setting third victory.
43:08It's Rhys Mathewson.
43:11Congratulations, Rhys.
43:13Soak it in.
43:15Your reputation in this country has officially peaked.
43:19Let him hear it, everyone.
43:22And please give it up for Sanjay Patel.
43:26As for you, Jonno, I don't know what to tell you.
43:30So I've got nothing to say.
43:31Go put your hat on.
43:36Can I just say, it turns out my wife was dead right
43:39when I was walking out the door.
43:44And in the business, we call that redemption.
43:53A big well done to all of our contestants.
43:56Please make them feel good about themselves
43:57by clapping for Paul, Kellyanne, Jonno and Rhys.
44:02And if you're at home, please come back next week
44:04when Rhys takes on the might of Jackie Brown, Ben Hurley
44:07and Rhianna McCall.
44:09You might as well call me Alibi Montgomery
44:11because of the police ask.
44:12I've been here the whole time.
44:14Ka kite anō!
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