00:00Douglas, I'm starting to get worried about this deodorant business.
00:07I haven't gotten my new stick of McGregor in the mail. You sent my old one back, right?
00:12Uh-huh.
00:14Well, then they're obviously trying some monkey business. Better give me the tracking number.
00:18Uh-huh.
00:19You know, for the package, so I can, uh, follow up.
00:22Oh, it's, uh...
00:242-4-6-8...
00:2810.
00:31That it?
00:33And, uh, Douglas, don't lose any sleep about this. I'm on the case.
00:38What's going on, Dad?
00:39Oh, it's a whole crazy thing Doug and I wrapped up in. He'll get you after speed.
00:45This whole Richie thing is killing me.
00:47Oh, I know, honey. It's rough on you guys to actually know real things about each other.
00:53It is. What do you think I should do? Should I tell him?
00:56Well, he is your friend, and his wife is making a jerk out of him.
01:00I don't know what I should tell him. It's just so personal, you know?
01:02Up until now, our relationship has been so simple.
01:04You know, we watch the games, we drink beers, we eat chips, we never share a deep feeling or thought.
01:10I don't want to lose that.
01:12I know, sweetie.
01:18She's really fooling around on him? Can you believe it?
01:20Hell, I believe it. I mean, come on, let's face it.
01:23I mean, come on, let's face it.
01:24Marie is the type that needs a lot of attention, and validation, and sex.
01:30Maybe that's my niche with women.
01:32Being the other man.
01:33The mysterious stranger who slips in for a few stolen moments of illicit pleasure, and then vanishes into the night.
01:40No, I see him more as the guy on the hedges with binoculars.
01:44I mean, words hurt.
01:46Look, whatever we do, Richie's going to be here like any minute, so we've got to figure out how we're going to tell him.
01:50Ixnay, here he comes.
01:53Hey, ladies, what's happening?
01:59Why you don't say hello?
02:00Hey, Richie!
02:01How's it going, buddy?
02:02Hey, Richie!
02:03What's with you guys?
02:04We're just, you know, fooling around.
02:05Fooling around!
02:09So, Moose, what's your answer on Atlantic City? Was Carrie able to get out of jury duty?
02:13I don't know. That judge won't call us back.
02:16We've got to make this happen, Moose. You know, Marie, she's friendly with all the pit bosses.
02:20She gets comped everywhere.
02:24Anyway, you know what I was thinking?
02:25I mean, the four of us, we hang out so much, but we never really talk, you know, about real stuff.
02:30You want to talk about real stuff?
02:33Sure, I'll give it a shot.
02:34Okay, let's do it.
02:36Here's something.
02:37You ever think about relatives who've died and wonder what they look like right now?
02:43Okay, not that real, all right?
02:44You know, I was thinking more like, I don't know, let's see.
02:48Looks like marriage, you know?
02:50Ooh, good one.
02:52Yeah, a lot of good stuff in marriage, huh?
02:54A lot of bad stuff, too, though.
02:56Yeah.
02:57Hey, how about that bad stuff, huh?
03:00Um...
03:02Penny holes in the shower rug?
03:03I hate that! I hate it!
03:05Well, how about when she uses your razor on her legs, you know?
03:09What about this toilet seat business?
03:11Oh, now, what do they want, right?
03:13Oh, yes, it's crazy, it's crazy, you know?
03:16Hey, how about when they have sex with, like, another guy, huh?
03:20Man, that's rough.
03:24What do you say, Moose?
03:28Are you saying that Carrie's cheating on you?
03:31Yes, I am.
03:33Oh, man, I'm so sorry.
03:35I never would have thought that Carrie would do that.
03:37Yeah, you know, I was upset, too, until I found out how common it is.
03:41It's so common.
03:43You think?
03:44Yeah, I mean, you gotta just, you know, brush it all off.
03:47Pick yourself up, dust yourself off, get back on your horse.
03:49Jeez, I gotta say, you guys handle this a lot better than I would.
03:52If it were me, I'd probably drive my car into a tree,
03:56because I'd feel like my life was over.
04:17Oh, man.
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