00:00Middle, middle on the wall, who is the fakest of them all?
00:04Well it sure as hell ain't me, I'm the most trustworthy guy around here, and it definitely
00:08ain't Shane McMahon who's made an entire career of slinging genuine, bonafide potatoes
00:12around the place.
00:13But what about Orange Cassidy's apathetic shin kicks?
00:15You're exposed into business.
00:18What about Kenny Omega vs a 9 year old girl?
00:20Don't you make a mockery of my noble sport, sir.
00:23And what about Kota Ibushi vs a blow-up doll?
00:27Long story short, wrestling isn't a real fight, I know, and people have hundreds of
00:36examples of moments like these that make it plainly obvious that what we're all watching
00:39is just some sort of glorious hand ballet.
00:42But there are a bunch of small moments that happen in most matches that are as fake as
00:46anything, but nobody really complains about them.
00:50So I'm gonna.
00:51Well it's more that I'm gonna list them for funsies.
00:52I'm Laurie, hailing from partsFUN, and these are the 10 Fakest Things In Wrestling That
00:58No One Complains About.
01:00Hey before we get on with the thing though, do a subscribe if you like wrestling lists
01:03and other fun wrestling content.
01:05I even made a video about the history of wrestling and how it turned from a legit competition
01:09to kayfabefickery, so check that one out.
01:1210.
01:13Let's Play Catch
01:15Wrestling loves a big dive.
01:17Fans love a big dive.
01:18Like Rubicon Mango, it's a cheap pop worth having.
01:21Why?
01:231.
01:24It's always fun to watch a wrestler go weee as they fly through the air.
01:26And 2.
01:27It looks dangerous.
01:28Having a whole grown ass person land on you from 8ft up looks like it would really hurt
01:32for real.
01:33But what is not for real and actual is the way that the wrestlers on the floor, the dive-ees,
01:38just wait for the dive-er to climb the turnbuckle, psych themselves up and then leap into the
01:42unknown.
01:43It's all stumbling about, throwing soft punches while they wait to be jumped on.
01:47Just flee you fools.
01:49Of course the alternative to this is just letting the wrestler doing the jumping splat
01:52on the floor.
01:53And judging by that bump that Nash Carter took on NXT 2.0, catching them is a much better
01:58option.
01:599.
02:00The 619
02:01Don't get me wrong, Rey Mysterio or Io Shirai swinging both their hind legs into your face
02:05at speed is going to leave a mark.
02:06There is nothing to obviously fake there.
02:09But why is it that their opponents always manage to fall so perfectly plum across the
02:13middle rope?
02:14Nobody ever falls on the middle rope.
02:16It's the ugly stepchild of the ropes.
02:18Bottom rope is good for breaking holds, top rope for jumping off of and it's crucial
02:22to a royal rumble.
02:23Middle rope?
02:24Good for catching your balls on, on the way into the ring.
02:27I dunno, I'm not a rope scientist.
02:29So how is it that Rey Rey has managed to create an entire arsenal of moves that land people
02:34precisely on the middle rope?
02:36I mean it's always a great moment and the same could be said for most moves that set
02:38people up for a top rope finisher, like Finn Balor's shotgun dropkick.
02:42But it's flown under the fake radar for far too long so I'm calling it out.
02:478.
02:48Wait for my music.
02:50Everyone deserves a friend that is going to watch their back.
02:52Through thick and thin, a true ride or die.
02:55Oli has Luke, Pete has Tempest and me and Adam, we're just colleagues, thanks.
03:00Wrestlers need them especially to save them from a beatdown when the dastardly heels jump
03:03you post-match.
03:04However, a good rescue can't begin without the mood being set.
03:09You gotta dim the lights, scatter the rose petals and PLAY MY GOD DAMN ENTRANCE MUSIC
03:14SOUNDMAN GREG.
03:15Why do they always wait for their music to hit before coming out to make the save?
03:19Picture the scene, Hulk Hogan is having a bad time in the ring, getting beaten up by
03:23Sid and Papa Shango and there stands the ultimate warrior behind the curtain, raring to go,
03:28ready to save his old rival, shatting about lightning bolts, he's the colour of old
03:32leather, but he just can't go out without his music Greg.
03:37Think of all the beatings that could have been prevented over the years if wrestlers
03:41didn't need announcing before they made a save.
03:43Do better Gregory, I do better.
03:467.
03:47The Tree of Woe
03:48What's the worst kind of tree?
03:50That's right, family trees, cos you go back 300 years and everyone was a murderer.
03:55Not me mind, I'm descended from angels, but you probably, Adam definitely, god knows
03:59what goes on on Jersey.
04:01The second worst tree is the tree of woe.
04:03Neither a tree nor woe, it's when a wrestler gets trapped upside down hanging from the
04:07turnbuckle as if they couldn't just unhook their legs and get out of it.
04:11See it's a little bit of a disbelief breaking sin, but what's worse is when the person
04:15in the tree of woe has to hold themselves up in order to receive a move, just sort of
04:20waiting to be hit.
04:21Alberto Del Rio foot stomp, I'm looking at you.
04:24Like why?
04:25What's the reason you'd hoist yourself up, because you can't see what you're
04:29doing over there climbing the turnbuckle Mr Del Rio?
04:31Oh no, he's stumped on me.
04:34Andrade and Pac managed to make this make a little bit more sense as Idolo pulled the
04:37bastard up for the move during their Rampage match, but it is still a very contrived set
04:43up.
04:44Number six, where's that heel going?
04:46WWE sure loves their count out finishes, don't they?
04:49It is an annoying way to avoid giving a proper finish, because who wants to be satisfied
04:54with the product that they're watching?
04:55But it makes a sort of sense when the heel decides that they're done wrestling and gets
04:58intentionally counted out in order to retain some sort of title or what have you.
05:02But what is a real bad is when a heel goes to get intentionally counted out and the baby
05:06face just stands there looking on stunned, seemingly unaware that they are capable of
05:11leaving the ring to retrieve said heel.
05:13Pop out and back in to reset the count, babes.
05:15Something like this snaps you out of your suspension of disbelief so fast.
05:20Those goody two shoes standing in the ring looking around like, oh man, if only there
05:24was something I could have done to keep this from happening.
05:26Oh, I don't know.
05:27Have you, have you tried trying?
05:29Number five, the slow crawl to the hot tag.
05:32Ah, well now this is a bit of fun.
05:34The build to a hot tag is as old as tag team wrestling itself.
05:38It is true drama or melodrama.
05:41You cut the baby face off, you grind them down and you make them work for that tag.
05:45You do it right and the fans should be coming unglued by the time they finally reach their
05:49partner.
05:50But man, oh man, is it silly to see the baby face crawling across the ring like a cat who's
05:54just come back from the vets.
05:56Show a clip of that, Vinny.
05:57Show a clip of the cats.
05:59People love cats.
06:00Because also then when they've made the tag, they miraculously pop back up on the apron
06:02and then they'll be running wild in a couple of seconds when they're tagged back in a minute
06:06later.
06:07These folks sell you on the idea that they are on the verge of death.
06:10One HP left, no stamina, whole body flashing red until they can make that tag and then
06:15suddenly boom, kiraga, back in you go.
06:19Number four, climbing the ladder.
06:21Picture this, there's a title hanging 12 feet above the ring.
06:24But you don't need to worry, that's a completely solvable problem as there's a handy dandy
06:28ladder at ringside.
06:29All you gotta do is climb it.
06:31Sure, you might be a bit banged up, you might be a little tired, but surely you can climb
06:35that ladder.
06:36Oh no, where did all the bones in my body go?
06:38From watching the way that wrestlers attempt to jelly limb their way up a ladder like they
06:41were nought but a sack of organs, you would think that it was difficult.
06:45But in wrestling, dozens of championship aspirations have been dashed by wrestlers just simply
06:49not being able to climb fast enough.
06:52Jeff Hardy tries to climb against The Undertaker in 2002, Shawn Michaels can't climb at No
06:58Mercy in 2008.
06:59A wrestler being able to climb 12 feet in less than two minutes is just so unlikely.
07:04There are instances of course, like the North American title ladder match from TakeOver
07:07New Orleans where all of the competitors agreed to climb as fast as possible for the whole
07:12match, meaning that it was someone else's job to stop them.
07:16That whole thing takes expert timing, which is why the slow climb persists to this day.
07:22Number three, they just won't go over.
07:26Look at every great Royal Rumble or Battle Royal elimination that you can, what comes
07:30to mind?
07:31Shawn Michaels going out in 2010, Paul London in 2005, Kane in 2001, there are tons to choose
07:38from.
07:39And all of them seem to involve a big lariat or a big finisher being hit.
07:42It seems like a pretty good strategy if you ask me.
07:45So why do so many wrestlers spend most of the match just hugging each other in the ropes?
07:50You can hug a man's leg all you want, but he's not going to go over, that's just
07:54physics.
07:55Or you could try hugging him for an uncomfortably long time and hope that he just leaves of
07:58his own accord, but what's to stop someone smarter than you, you know, eliminating you.
08:03And it's generally just been accepted that this is what the people not involved in the
08:06central spots do during a Battle Royal to buy their time.
08:10But when you look closely at it, it's like one of those flash mob things where everyone
08:14pretends to be frozen, a massive waste of everyone's time.
08:18Number two, battling in submissions.
08:21Now this is as dramatic as it gets.
08:24How many incredible matches have been made that much better because of a long, heated
08:28spot of a babyface battling through the pain while trapped in a deadly submission hold?
08:33Shawn Michaels and Kurt Angle at WrestleMania 21, CM Punk and John Cena at Money in the
08:37Bank, the list is genuinely endless and this spot is one of the most effective at creating
08:43emotion when done right.
08:45So then why is it on this list you filthy ginger beggar?
08:48Well because if you spent more than two seconds in a proper ankle lock, there's a good chance
08:51you would never be able to use that foot again for all of your walking and walking
08:54related activities.
08:56Submission holds, when applied properly, are incredibly dangerous, devastating and will
09:01cause serious damage to the poor soul unlucky enough to be trapped in them.
09:05Obviously, wrestling allows for the more dramatic, theatrical side of the sport to be showcased,
09:09but if you are basing your enjoyment purely on realism, there is simply no way that HBK
09:14lies in that ankle lock for two minutes and then is able to walk away.
09:19Kurt is killing them cankles.
09:211.
09:22Running the Ropes
09:24Have you ever tried to stop running?
09:26It's weird how you just sort of think about it, and you just stop, like you're in charge
09:31of your own legs.
09:32Madness.
09:33Madness.
09:34I know right?
09:35But in wrestling there's this mystical thing called momentum, which you build up enough
09:37of by bouncing off the ropes or being Irish whipped and suddenly the simple act of stopping
09:41running is impossible, like you got the speed booster in Super Metroid.
09:45And it's just one of those things that we all accept about sports entertainment, a wrestler
09:49is whipped into the ropes and they just keep running, because there isn't really a good
09:54answer to that is there?
09:55There's like what?
09:56Like velocity?
09:57Inertia?
09:58Am I using any of that correctly?
09:59I don't know, I'm not a legs scientist.
10:00Almost every wrestling match probably ever has involved somebody running the ropes or
10:05being whipped.
10:06It is one of the main things that we happily overlook to enjoy our wrestling.
10:11And you know what?
10:12Like all things on this list, that is just fine so long as we're all having fun.
10:16Isn't it nice to have a nice message at the end of a video?
10:19It is.
10:20So that's the list.
10:21Can you think up any other fake bits of wrestling that people just aren't talking about and
10:24widely accept?
10:26If so, drop them in a comment down below and click the videos on screen now to see even
10:29more glorious PFK content.
10:32Jam that jam hand ballet fans, jam that jam.
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