00:00 How can you talk further about sexual violence without talking about penis and vagina?
00:05 What they put pictures is they hide the genital organ behind pants and they put the label "penis".
00:10 How vagina look like? How penis look like?
00:13 If we don't respect it and we don't teach that medically accurate,
00:17 how can you start or normalise a conversation on sex?
00:20 You have to really be in depth.
00:22 You have to teach how does that happen? Why does it happen?
00:26 You can't just say like, "Yeah, sex makes babies, so avoid sex at a young age."
00:31 The moment you say don't do it, it's the first thing you're going to do.
00:34 There's a huge misconception that schools, teachers and the communities are ultra conservative
00:41 and they won't be able to accept our programmes.
00:44 It's actually the opposite. They are very open.
00:46 We provide comprehensive sexuality education.
00:54 We started in 2015 and we have since educated more than 20,000 young people.
00:59 And we are ever evolving in our quest to, of course, remove embarrassment, stigma and fear around sexuality education.
01:08 We have a programme called "Sexuality in the City"
01:11 where we talk about the importance of sexuality education in the city.
01:14 We have a programme called "Sexuality in the City"
01:16 where we talk about the importance of sexuality education in the city.
01:19 We have a programme called "Sexuality in the City"
01:21 where we talk about the importance of sexuality education in the city.
01:24 We talk about relationships.
01:27 We talk about sexuality. We talk about sex.
01:29 We talk about sexual health.
01:31 And we talk about boundaries, consent, the safe and unsafe touches.
01:35 We work with teachers, parents, young people, medical professionals, school counsellors
01:40 and other organisations in order to bring our programmes into schools
01:45 because we want to address the spectrum of tragedies that comes from not doing it.
01:51 [Music]
02:05 There are two types of sexuality education.
02:07 One is abstinent-based and the other is comprehensive-based.
02:10 So abstinent-based is the core value is abstinent, meaning no, say no.
02:15 Most of it is not medically accurate
02:18 because they believe that if you teach more information
02:21 it will tick the curiosity of the children so they will do more.
02:25 So instead of giving the information, they will try to hide the information.
02:29 But in comprehensive sexuality education, they also provide enough information,
02:33 medically accurate and age appropriate
02:35 so the person can make a decision and know that there are consequences.
02:39 [Music]
02:44 What I like about SPOT is that they really thrive to make a safe space,
02:47 make it so that no one is judging each other
02:50 because it's all really taboo topics so it's not really easy to talk about.
02:54 They'll give you really in-depth situations and they'll be like,
02:57 "What should person A do?"
02:59 I think at that time there was quite a few discussions.
03:02 You have to really think like, "Huh, okay, this is quite tricky, this is quite complicated."
03:08 Whereas PEERS, it was in the classroom and everyone's a bit on edge.
03:13 [Music]
03:18 [Students talking]
03:31 I am not a PGK trained teacher, but I am one of those teachers which set challenges.
03:37 We were asked to fill in all the loopholes in our timetable.
03:41 So basically when I don't understand anything, I will try to do my Google search.
03:45 If not, I will try to go and ask those PGK teachers because they are trained.
03:50 The way we implement it in class and how we plan our activities, it all depends on ourselves.
03:56 I think teachers should be trained.
03:58 Maybe we still find certain parts for us, shy, a bit ashamed to expose to the student.
04:05 When I first know that PEERS is in PGK, I was like stunned, you know.
04:11 I opened the textbook, I asked the PGK teacher, "They are teaching this in PGK now?"
04:18 If a student sees a PGK subject in the timetable, they will assume it's just playing ball.
04:25 Initially it was very difficult for me to divert them back to the classroom.
04:29 So I brought this classroom to the field. Surprisingly, certain students who are not focused in class,
04:35 sometimes they become very interested in the topic itself.
04:38 That will be our main topic for the day actually.
04:57 And you can see the statistics on rape, incest, sexual violence among children is increasing.
05:04 So that's also showing that although there was some sort of sexual education that was done,
05:09 whether it's a government effort or whether it's an NGO effort, it's still not enough.
05:12 So how come the people didn't know that incest is actually wrong?
05:16 I have this student of mine. Her mother remarried actually.
05:22 And then this girl is always afraid to go home because she used to be molested by her stepfather.
05:32 When she opened up, I sort of frightened and we were like hugging each other.
05:38 But I can't do much because I can only do as much as I can as a teacher.
05:43 And they are not daring enough to speak to anybody about it.
05:47 Because they are aware that if it's reported elsewhere, then they will lose their place to go.
05:53 We have played our role as a teacher to expose them to their peers.
05:57 The rest, it all depends on their parents and their family background.
06:02 I think I taught Malaika about sex ed when she was quite young, probably was about nine.
06:12 I think a lot of parents feel it's important, feel very uncomfortable to still talk about it.
06:19 But I think parents today, maybe they are always very careful in their approach.
06:24 I have a son and a daughter and we've had a full on Q&A session about sex,
06:31 both of them together in the same room because I do feel that it's important for my son to understand
06:36 how it works for women and for the girls to understand how it works for guys as well.
06:41 It's not like, "Oh, let's have a family talk right now and let's talk about sex."
06:46 No, it's always like whenever someone is unsure or has some question, it just opens up from there.
06:52 And if there was one thing that needs to happen in school,
06:56 to have more educators that are willing to listen without judgment.
07:01 We cannot just say, "Oh, haram, tak boleh, tak boleh." We say like that,
07:05 the kids will feel like, "What's wrong with these people?"
07:08 So we need to talk both ways. So that's a skill also for the trainer.
07:11 But again, that's where comprehensive education is age appropriate and culturally appropriate.
07:16 So you go to Islam community, you use different way.
07:20 You go to the international school, it's a different way.
07:22 We can actually share the value, not fostering, but share the value.
07:26 This is society value. This is our country value. This is also the Islamic value.
07:30 So now you have to think about your personal values.
07:32 So sport get the job to teach sex education in school with the support of ministry.
07:37 That's a beautiful part of it. NGO is there to complement the government.
07:41 What I feel that's needed the most is support for teachers.
07:46 I feel that teachers have the right intention,
07:49 but of course the system is not helpful for them to address sex and sexuality within their classroom.
07:58 We are doing this currently in hopes that one day we will be obsolete.
08:01 So there are efforts and people are making progress. We just need to push through.
08:06 Soka law just came in 2017, gladly.
08:08 Just recently we have anti harassment law.
08:11 So everything is just coming. Maybe we have to wait another 15 years.
08:14 I don't know which is sad, but that's the reality.
08:17 You are here today because your parents had sex.
08:25 And your grandparents had sex. And your parents had sex.
08:29 So that came from love. Not all sex is bad.
08:33 [MUSIC PLAYING]
08:36 (upbeat music)
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