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Never Mind The Buzzcocks Season 5 Episode 2
#NeverMindTheBuzzcocks
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FunTranscript
00:00The following program contains strong language
00:10Jamali
00:12What's this shit?
00:14I splashed out mate booked all of five. You've got abscess. No, I don't get a seat. Is this this shit?
00:20We built you a Jamali extension
00:30There comes a people watching a desk being built. I feel like we've missed a trick because Jesus is here and he's a carpenter
00:40He could have fucking
01:00What is never mind the buzzcocks? I'll tell you it's a fat old man a bony goth a heavily pregnant northern woman and a reformed pussy hound
01:20Let's talk music
01:22Joining Jamali on knowl's team
01:27It's one of the greatest boy bands this country has ever produced and the stack party you pray won't be sitting next to you
01:33When you get into the departure gate, it's all of five
01:44Tonight there's so much we can say about this singer. He's a lovely man
01:48He represented us beautifully at the
01:5022 Eurovision Song Contest an incredible voice an angel of a man
01:55But I'm gonna nail my colors to the mast and say it because no one else is brave enough to he looks like an afghan hound
02:14To quote our next guest feel the rain on your skin only you can let it in
02:18I've got bad news for you skin is there to keep water out. It's grammy-nominated singer-songwriter and soggy human sponge
02:26Natasha
02:36What a lineup hello five hello Greg now obviously I'm a massive five fan, but maybe not everybody knows your names not everyone's as cool as me
02:44So I'm gonna ask you to introduce yourself, please. So here is the official five intro hi. I'm Scott. I'm Richie. I'm abs
02:52I'm Sean. I'm Jay. I'm together. We are
03:10Are you five bad boys with the power to rock us? Sometimes you seem like lovely boys to me
03:15There's been a few insolences
03:20It's gonna be difficult having all five here, so I'm introducing the five conch
03:25So unless you've got the five college you can't speak otherwise it's gonna be chaos. Why have you given it to him?
03:30He never shuts off. Yeah, I don't need this mate. I don't think they're gonna follow the conch rules
03:36Have you got the conch me quiet?
03:38He's allowed to speak to everyone
03:40She's been stuck on the end of the table
03:42I'm not even on Nevermind the Buzzcox. I'm on Taskmaster over here, bud
03:47Sam Ryder, everyone
03:53Have you ever been a bad boy, Sam?
03:55You seem to me to be the nicest man in music
03:57I quite would like to join five
03:59Okay, Sam you do join five. What are you gonna be called?
04:03Six
04:06Hasn't got the same ring to it, hasn't it?
04:10What happened on the train on the way to Glastonbury, sir?
04:12Right, so invited some people to come down, meet me in carriage, Jay
04:17Sing on the way to Glastonbury
04:19Some people didn't even have tickets to go to Glastonbury
04:21They just went on the train
04:22And I can see by the look on your face
04:24That you're asking me this because that would be the hell of your earth, wouldn't it?
04:28No, it wouldn't be the hell of my earth, Sam
04:30I don't know why I said it that way
04:32Have a look at Sam singing on the train on the way to Glastonbury
04:35It's simply adorable
04:37And I said, hey, yeah, yeah
04:42Hey, yeah, yeah
04:44Thank God
04:45I said, hey
04:46I feel like my friends now
04:47What's going on?
04:49Ah, isn't it?
04:55Why were you singing? Something to do with some green initiative
04:57Yes, yeah, yeah
04:58Artists travelling to Glastonbury
05:00Just getting on the train, basically
05:02Oh, Sam, you're bloody adorable, mate
05:04I read this thing that your partner looked at all the comments
05:09After that video on YouTube
05:11And just shut the laptop and went, don't look at the comments
05:13People are so mean, aren't they?
05:16Mate, it is a dark world
05:18It is a dark world
05:19It is a dark world
05:20It is a dark world
05:21It is Natasha Benningfield
05:22Hello
05:23Hello
05:24Natasha, welcome
05:25You all right?
05:26Yeah
05:27You live in America, what are you doing here?
05:28I've been touring mostly right now
05:29I've just been travelling
05:30So it doesn't feel like I live in America
05:31But I do live in New York
05:33Do you?
05:34And, yeah, it's fun
05:35And you have got a child?
05:37I have a child who is seven
05:39Sophie, have you not looked for some advice
05:42Seen as you're, er, and I think, I think this is appropriate
05:44Knocked up?
05:45Yeah
05:46Up the doff
05:47Yeah
05:48I just know that, like, when I was as pregnant as you
05:49I was trying to hide it
05:50Because I thought my career would be over
05:52I've had to embrace it
05:53Yeah
05:54Because I've been such a c*****
05:55I promise I wouldn't
06:00I don't think you should be a mother
06:06Tell me about your Rod Stewart dream
06:11For some reason I had a weird dream about him
06:13And in the dream I was naked
06:15And I was in a cab
06:17And I woke up
06:18I took the dream off
06:19And then I got a call from my management
06:21Saying he was asking me to go on tour with him
06:23To open for him
06:24Wow
06:25That's how he lures you in
06:26Yeah
06:27Freddy Krueger, man
06:29He jumps in your dreams, man
06:31He ruffled my hair when I was a kid
06:33What?
06:34Rod Stewart
06:35Yeah
06:36And my mum to this day says
06:37You've been touched by the hand of Rod
06:39It was like a
06:42It was a nice
06:43There was nothing
06:44Pedo-y about it
06:46Hang on
06:48I don't think anyone was suggesting there was anything
06:50Pedo-y about it
06:51Let's crack on with the show
06:54Thank you
06:56Alright, the first question is for Sophie's team
06:59Your question is all about these music legends
07:01Take a look at this
07:02Superman
07:04Hold on
07:05At it
07:06That was the three Saturday girls in your local Pandora, the Bee Gees
07:12That was the three Saturday girls in your local Pandora, the Bee Gees.
07:30But can you tell me which of the Bee Gees brothers had a strange hobby?
07:34Was it A. Morris Gibb was a fanatical paintballer.
07:38He opened his own paintball equipment shop.
07:40He had his own team called the Royal Rat Rangers, and he called himself Commander Moe.
07:45He said,
07:46Or was it B. in the 1970s, Robin Gibb used to sell a tape pubic hairs...
07:58Oh, that's my book.
08:02In the 1970s, Robin Gibb used to sell a tape pubic hairs from everyone he'd slept with into a scrapbook.
08:08When his housekeeper found the book and asked why he was collecting eyebrows,
08:12he leant forward, he took a deep sniff of the page, and he said,
08:17Do they smell like eyebrows to you, Josefina?
08:20Now, baby, RG collects fuzz.
08:28Or was it C. in 1997, Barry Gibb broke the Guinness World Record for the largest collection of shisha pipes.
08:34Speaking about his obsession, he said,
08:36I just love the shape.
08:37It's like a tall, sexy woman wearing a big hat, a.k.a. the ultimate dream.
08:43So, incredibly, Sophie's team, one of those is true.
08:47Are you Bee Gees fans?
08:48I have a huge Bee Gees fan.
08:50I love...
08:50They used to write all the pop songs.
08:52Like, they were amazing pop groups.
08:53Barry Gibbs.
08:54Barry Gibbs is a genius.
08:55Yeah, he's great.
08:55Yeah.
08:55I mean, he looks mad, but he's brilliant.
08:58Shagged in a TARDIS.
09:00He did shag in the TARDIS.
09:01Didn't he?
09:02What a legend.
09:03It must look enormous in there.
09:05What a legend.
09:06That deserved more from Jay.
09:07What did he say?
09:07He said, it must have looked enormous in there.
09:09LAUGHTER
09:10LAUGHTER
09:11LAUGHTER
09:12APPLAUSE
09:13LAUGHTER
09:14APPLAUSE
09:16Is it hard to sing like a Bee Gees?
09:18I'm going to ask the singers here.
09:19No offence, Lutz.
09:20LAUGHTER
09:21LAUGHTER
09:22LAUGHTER
09:23That's a bad boy.
09:24That was naughty, though.
09:27That is a long one.
09:28Very, very naughty.
09:29Go on, then.
09:30Sing like a Bee Gees.
09:30You can't tell, but when I know my work, I'm a woman's man.
09:34No time to talk.
09:35Ha, ha, ha, ha, still alive.
09:38CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
09:40CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
09:42CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
09:44Well, that is an unexpected erection.
09:48LAUGHTER
09:49Shall we get a bit of a competition going?
09:53You'll give us a bit of Bee Gees, Sam, won't you?
09:55Shit.
09:55Whoo!
09:57That's great, Lutz.
09:58You can't top that, Sam.
09:59CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
10:03I think that was actually class.
10:04I'm annoyed that we've got to do it now.
10:06Yeah.
10:07Sam, this is now your audition to join five.
10:09LAUGHTER
10:11Right, it's staying alive.
10:13Yeah, I can tell by the way I use my walk and my woman's man.
10:19No time to talk.
10:20Music loud, women warm.
10:23I've been kicked around since I was born.
10:25And now it's all right.
10:26Come on, Molly.
10:27If you can't, you can't let the other way.
10:30If you can't try to understand.
10:33Look at my time, so make no man.
10:35Whether you're alive or anything, you're alive or anything.
10:37You're staying alive.
10:38Jesus.
10:39Staying alive.
10:39When a little taken and everybody's taken to stay alive,
10:43Staying alive.
10:44Going, ah-ah-ah-ah,
10:46Staying alive.
10:48Staying alive.
10:49Ah-ah-ah-ah,
10:51Staying alive.
11:01Whoo!
11:01There we go, Ray.
11:03CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
11:07Imagine if Barry Gibb just turns on the telly at that exact moment and sees that.
11:14In his TARDIS.
11:15Yeah.
11:16OK.
11:17What do you reckon?
11:18Do you think Maurice Gibb was a paintball, though?
11:20Did they have paintball back then?
11:22That's why I'm not sure about the paintball thing.
11:23Feels a new thing, doesn't it?
11:25Yeah.
11:26I feel like they definitely had shisha pipes back then.
11:28Do you?
11:29Jamali, have you paintballed?
11:30My first job was I was a paintball referee.
11:32Shut up.
11:33One time I got shot in my ball and it went in my mask, in my face.
11:38You got shot in your ball?
11:39Not balls.
11:40Ball.
11:41Like it was such a pinpoint accurate shot of my ball bag.
11:45Oh, I thought you got shot in your ball and your ball went into your...
11:52How dangly your balls were, that could be a possibility for you?
11:55Mate, I'm 57.
11:56They're not even in this room.
12:02Hey, listen, we're talking about strange hobbies.
12:03Jay has got a great hobby.
12:06Oh.
12:06Jay's new hobby is thrusting.
12:07Oh.
12:08Jay's new hobby is thrusting.
12:09Oh.
12:10Oh, yes, it is.
12:11Yes, it is.
12:12Have a look!
12:13That's why I'm easy.
12:18You belong somewhere.
12:24Christ, I would love to do that, but I'd dislocate my pelvis.
12:38Shall we get back to the question?
12:40Yeah.
12:41Robin Gibb was collecting pubic hair, do you think?
12:44It feels horrible.
12:46It feels very sleazy, yeah.
12:47He had another hobby that might give you a flavour of who he was.
12:50From the age of eight, Robin Gibb's hobby was to start fires around Manchester.
12:54What?
12:57Genuinely, this is not made up.
12:59When he was asked about it in an interview, Robin said this.
13:02I used to go around and light fires on golf courses and a few dream homes too, perhaps.
13:07Quite cheeky, perhaps.
13:10It was done with a lot of love and respect.
13:12It was just a hobby.
13:13Wow.
13:14I think he might be a serial killer, actually.
13:17What sort of a man is Barry, do you think?
13:20Oh, Barry.
13:22Have you got any facts on him?
13:23I've got a fact for you, all right?
13:24Yeah?
13:25In a photography session for Barry Gibb, it nearly didn't happen because his brothers refused
13:30to enter the room until it was exactly 20 degrees, otherwise Barry's hair would wilt.
13:37That's great.
13:39Shall we make a decision?
13:40You said C.
13:41I think C.
13:42Yeah, to back that up?
13:44With the other ones, he was laughing so much that I just think he was lying.
13:47C feels possible, doesn't it?
13:49You think Barry Gibb had a load of shisha pipes?
13:52Yes.
13:53Oh, actually, no, actually, what about the sellotape?
13:55Because he is odd, isn't he?
13:57He's an arsonist already.
13:58He's not collecting pubes.
13:59Who does that?
14:00Is he not?
14:00Who does that?
14:01Sam is absolutely sure about this.
14:02He's not collecting pubes.
14:03There's no way.
14:04No.
14:04There's no way.
14:05Come on, let's pick.
14:06Well, the only one that's an actual hobby is paintballing.
14:09I thought you were going to say pubes.
14:11I never know.
14:13Paintballing.
14:14A.
14:15The answer is A.
14:16Woo!
14:17No way!
14:18Morris Gibb was massively into paintballing.
14:23Here's the proof.
14:23Have a look.
14:27Morris said the greatest natural high is going on stage and performing, recording, writing
14:31the songs, and then releasing it to the world.
14:33It's the same kind of ferocious with paintballing.
14:36It's exciting and safe and fun.
14:39Well done, Sammy Steve.
14:40CHEERING
14:40One point.
14:42That was good, that was good.
14:44OK.
14:45Noel's team, take a look at this.
14:46That was your classmate whose mum's surprised by how many people had written wanker on his
15:15school leaving shirt.
15:16LAUGHTER
15:17J.K. from Jomaraquai.
15:21But can you tell me which rocker drove him to...
15:25..on board a long-haul flight to Australia?
15:30Was it?
15:30A.
15:31J.K. was furious, because he was sat next to Johnny Rotten, who was doing unforgivably rotten
15:35farts.
15:36J.K. whines in an interview.
15:37He's a fucking nuisance.
15:39It was totally foul.
15:40He kept saying, oh, that wasn't me, or...
15:42Or, that meal smells a bit off, don't you think?
15:46J.K. said, they ban smoking in the air, they should ban farting.
15:51That was a weird J.K. impression, wasn't it?
15:54Yeah.
15:54I don't know, I mean...
15:55I liked it.
15:55It's kind of went everywhere, all the regions.
15:57Does he speak of me like that?
15:59No.
15:59Oh, I thought you were doing J.K. Rowling.
16:01That makes more sense.
16:02LAUGHTER
16:03APPLAUSE
16:04Yeah.
16:05Or was it B.
16:10Dougie from McFly felt the full force of J's rage after he got his finger skateboard stuck
16:14in J.K.'s hair.
16:16Dougie said, I was using the back of his chair to do a disco flip into a pop shove-it, but
16:20we hit a patch of turbulence and I lost control of my hand.
16:23We were lucky that Tom had some scissors hidden in his socks.
16:27LAUGHTER
16:28Or was it C.
16:29Blink 182's Tom DeLonge tested J.K.'s patience when he started waxing his chest.
16:34J.K. said, before every strip, he kept saying, please, Mummy, no.
16:38Thank God I wear such big hats.
16:40I just pulled it over my ears.
16:42We didn't speak again until we were over Cairo.
16:44LAUGHTER
16:45Natasha, someone tried to get you in the Meyer High Club, is that right?
16:48Somebody asked me to join it and I didn't realise until Alfred got off the flight what
16:53it meant.
16:53Oh.
16:54So I was like, yeah, I've been thinking of joining it sometime.
16:57LAUGHTER
16:57I can't imagine even attempting the Meyer High Club being my size.
17:01I find it hard enough having a shit in those toilets.
17:05Yeah, it's hard, yeah.
17:07But I do.
17:08LAUGHTER
17:09Do five fly together?
17:13Yeah, yeah.
17:14Like geese migrating.
17:15LAUGHTER
17:16LAUGHTER
17:17LAUGHTER
17:18Do I fly in, Jamali?
17:24Do you know what?
17:25I don't like it as much now because they don't check me when I'm checking in and I'm like,
17:29this is, this is the look.
17:31LAUGHTER
17:32It makes me feel uncomfortable.
17:34I'm like, you sure you don't want to look in his back?
17:36Nah, I can't.
17:36I can't.
17:36I'm through, I can't.
17:37LAUGHTER
17:38LAUGHTER
17:39Well, you're encouraging them.
17:41Yeah, but who are we looking for then?
17:43Yeah.
17:43LAUGHTER
17:44LAUGHTER
17:44Sophie, you like fly?
17:47I don't mind it, but normally I do get pissed.
17:49But the last fly, I just found out I was pregnant and I went at half term,
17:55which was horrific.
17:55I nearly got off to have an abortion.
17:57It was...
17:57LAUGHTER
17:58LAUGHTER
17:59It was genuine work.
18:01Fuck me.
18:02LAUGHTER
18:03LAUGHTER
18:04Yeah.
18:07Shouldn't be a mother.
18:08LAUGHTER
18:09LAUGHTER
18:10OK, what do you think?
18:13Have a look.
18:14We've got to pet one of these.
18:15Did McFly get a finger skateboard stuck in JK's hair?
18:19B feels, like, made up.
18:21How would they have got to his hair?
18:22Cos he's always got that fucking idiotic hat on.
18:25Which would make you go for C,
18:27because if he's pulled the hat down and gone to sleep,
18:30I don't think he'd be as offended by a fart.
18:33I reckon punks take a lot of cheap whiz
18:35than I reckon your farts.
18:36LAUGHTER
18:37It's a terrible fart.
18:40I've sat next to a few punks in Camden
18:42and their farts are rancid.
18:43LAUGHTER
18:44I'm going to go with Johnny Rotten.
18:47Yeah.
18:47Farting like a trooper.
18:49LAUGHTER
18:50It's the A.
18:51The answer is A!
18:54CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
18:55JK, if he's Johnny Rotten of farting his way
18:59through a long-haul flight to Australia,
19:01will the NOLS team appoint you?
19:03CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
19:05CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
19:06Time for a break.
19:09One of Natasha's biggest hits is Unwritten,
19:11and I've taken inspiration from her book.
19:13I'm going to improvise this link to break.
19:15Ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba!
19:17Adverts.
19:19CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
19:19CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
19:21CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
19:23CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
19:25CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
19:27CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
19:28WELCOME BACK TO THE LINE OF MUSKOTS,
19:31HOSTED BY ME, IN MANY WAYS, A MALE Enya.
19:35MUSIC PLAYS
19:37MUSIC PLAYS
19:38MUSIC PLAYS
19:39Next up is the intros round.
19:40Sophie and Sam, it's your turn to start.
19:42You will be performing to Natasha.
19:44Fabulous.
19:45Am I Simon Cowell right now?
19:47You've got to guess the song.
19:48Don't critique it.
19:49Oh, I've got it wrong.
20:03MUSIC PLAYS
20:06CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
20:10CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
20:12You don't slip into it.
20:16It was that good.
20:18Yeah, thank you.
20:19I don't know what came over me.
20:20I tell you what, if it got J-thrusted,
20:22it must have been good to Natasha.
20:24I had no idea, sorry.
20:25OK, I'm going to pass it over.
20:27The title of the song is...
20:28SEXY BOY.
20:29You are right!
20:31CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
20:32CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
20:33Come on!
20:34It was Sexy Boy by Air,
20:36and here's how it should have sounded.
20:39Oh, that was good.
20:43That's really good.
20:48That was Air.
20:49With Sexy Boy as opposed to me.
20:51A Sexy Boy with Air.
20:52That's right.
20:53You could play me like a bagpire, play this.
21:01Song two?
21:02This has got a kind of, like, mall, hasn't it?
21:04Yeah.
21:05OK.
21:05OK, one.
21:06OK.
21:07Do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do- bunu-do-do-do-do-do-do- do-do-do-do-do.
21:14Please, Natasha.
21:16You'vephinstone.
21:17You looks like an episode of Fragile Rock.
21:19You know it, right?
21:21Do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do.
21:23Do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do.
21:24Come on, Natasha, it's the TI tämä song.
21:26We're not, we're not.
21:26D-d-d-d-d-do-do-do-do-do-do-do.
21:28LAUGHTER
21:28I
21:32Don't know it. Sorry. We know so just gonna get enough. No, you're both wrong. It was just a little bit by Gina G
21:58Hard luck, Sophie's team. No points at all
22:04All right, noll's team. This is a big moment five are about to become six
22:12Who'd have thought we'd see five being joined by Fidel Castro
22:21All right, then the first ever performance of six
22:25No get ready
22:28That's my job
22:39One two three go
22:42Oh
23:01My god so good incredible
23:04I don't know
23:11It is absolutely scandalous if you don't get that especially after that performance. I don't know what it is
23:17I love it
23:19Fuck what is it?
23:21I'm happy hope you're happy too
23:24What's the title of the song?
23:26Ashes to ashes
23:28Yeah
23:30I love it
23:32I love it
23:33I love it
23:34I love it
23:35I love it
23:36I love it
23:36I love it
23:37That was David Bowie with ashes to ashes which includes the lyrics we know major Tom's a junkie no mention of the worst thing that happened to him
23:57No, having to do endless laps of that garden and then his daughter by the spot
24:03Okay, next song please. Yeah count me in Jamali sure job. All right
24:07Now I've been patronizing
24:10Take charge of the country Fidel
24:14It's not easy with him
24:15It's not easy with him
24:16It's not easy with him
24:17One, two, three, go
24:18Three, go
24:34Down, better get down
24:46Ha, ha no
24:47No, surely I know I've had to feel like I'm at a stroke. I'm so sorry
24:56I'm gonna pass it over
24:58get on up
25:00I
25:02Don't want to be a sticker for the rules. I'll thank you for the title of the song
25:14Rainy days are dying gotta keep on keep on
25:17Ah
25:19I
25:21Don't want it
25:23Keep moving. Don't stop like it
25:25Get on up
25:27When you're down
25:29Take a good look around
25:31I know it's not much
25:33But it's okay
25:39Keep on moving
25:41Keep on moving
25:43Keep on moving
25:45What's the song called? Keep on moving
25:47It was five
25:49Keep on moving
25:51Here's how it should have sounded
25:53Keep on moving
25:55Keep on moving
25:57Keep on moving
25:59Keep on moving
26:01Keep on moving
26:03Keep on moving
26:05I nearly went into labour then
26:07But that's the most fun I've had in months
26:11At the end of that round, Sophie's team have two points
26:13And Noel's team have three points
26:15Time for a break
26:17I'll be back in five
26:21All of them and out again and then back in again
26:23I'm gonna be in like a bloody sewing machine
26:25God I'm horny
26:39Welcome back to Nevermind the Buzzcocks
26:41Where me and five have all been getting down
26:43Ironically, I couldn't get back up
26:45Okay
26:47Our next round is called ID Parades
26:49Where our panel have to identify a pop star from yesteryear
26:52Sophie's team
26:53Here's your line-up
26:54For the audience at home
26:55Take a look at this
26:57I've noticed you around
26:59Um
27:02I find you very attractive
27:10Would you, um
27:12It's a tune
27:19It's a tune, innit?
27:20You've all forgotten
27:21That was Touch and Go with Would You
27:23But can you tell me
27:24Which of our line-up is Vanessa Lancaster from the track?
27:28Is it
27:29Number one
27:30Touch and go
27:31Number two
27:32Touchdown
27:33Number three
27:34Touch and cloth
27:36Number four
27:37Ooh, touching
27:38Or number five
27:39Touch me
27:42It's so easy to leave me
27:46All along with my memory
27:50Of my days in the sun
28:00Who do you think?
28:01Have a look
28:02Number two looks fuming
28:04Oh, she smells a bad smell
28:07Johnny Rotten
28:08Yeah, could be
28:09Number five was smiling
28:11As if when the track was playing
28:12Like, yeah, that's me
28:13Could be her, yeah
28:14Yeah
28:15I feel like number three and number four
28:16Look like amazing performers
28:17I think number four looks like
28:19She's planning to take over the world
28:20Number three looks like
28:21She's always on Insta Live
28:22With her glass of wine
28:23Talking about how men ain't shit
28:24Oh
28:27Yeah
28:28Number three's got a performance stance
28:32A really good makeup
28:33Yeah
28:34I feel like number one knows some things
28:36What does she know?
28:37She's blinking a lot
28:38Is she saying
28:39SOS
28:40SOS
28:41I don't know
28:42All right
28:43These should help
28:44Okay
28:45Strap yourselves in
28:46Yeah
28:47Vanessa enjoys going on lovely walks
28:48Fuck me
28:49So that should really help lock it down for you
28:52Her favourite fruit is a Sharon fruit
28:55I mean
28:56What is it?
28:57Oh, no
28:58You might want to have a look at their hands
29:00Vanessa is into garden design and landscaping
29:04Shall we have a look at your hands?
29:05I'm gonna go
29:06Shall we go and have a nose there?
29:07Yeah
29:08Let's have a look
29:09Just
29:10Have a quick nose there
29:11Come on, Natasha
29:12Have a look at this
29:14Not you
29:15You've got lovely hands
29:17Definitely not you
29:18Nails too long
29:19I thought
29:20Number five
29:21Five
29:22Yeah
29:23I think five
29:24Your hands are wicked by the way
29:26They're not like
29:27I'm not saying your hands have got like garden
29:28He looked at number five
29:32He went
29:33Yep
29:34Calloused
29:35Thick
29:36Your hands are
29:37Thick like cowhide
29:38I love your hands
29:39Okay
29:40I'd say five as well actually
29:41She's got a cheeky smile
29:42Yeah
29:43Yeah
29:44And leathery hands
29:45Okay
29:47Sophie's team
29:48What are you going for?
29:49Five do you?
29:50Five?
29:51Yeah I think five
29:52And also the band five
29:53Cosmic
29:54Oh there you go
29:55Cosmic
29:56It's the same
29:57Sorry
29:58Are you talking about the band six?
29:59Oh yes I am
30:00I forgot
30:01Sophie and Fidel
30:02Would the real Vanessa please step forward?
30:05Oh I am
30:06Yay
30:07Well done
30:10Sophie's team
30:15Were right
30:17Vanessa
30:18Hello
30:19Hiya
30:20What are you going for these days?
30:21Well we're still working
30:22Still performing
30:23Yeah
30:24And I do do some gardening
30:25But I didn't paint my nails
30:26Let's hear it from Vanessa
30:27And the rest of the line up
30:28Woo
30:29Thank you
30:30Thank you
30:31Thank you
30:32Thank you
30:33Thank you
30:34Thank you
30:35Okay
30:36Knowles team
30:37Your turn
30:38For the audience at home
30:39Take a look at this
30:40Anything you are is heaven
30:43Oh I can't get enough
30:45No I can't get enough
30:46No I can't get enough
30:49Instant music
30:50I can't get enough
30:51That was Yell with Instant Replay
30:53But Knowles team
30:54What I want to know is
30:55Which of our line up is Paul Varney from the group?
30:57Is it?
30:58Number one, Yell
30:59Number two, lovely show
31:01What I want to know is
31:03Which of our line up is Paul Varney from the group?
31:05Is it?
31:06Number one, Yell
31:08Number two, lovely show
31:09Number two, lovely smell
31:10Number three, kiss and will tell
31:12Number four, weed to sell
31:14Number five, my computer is a dowel
31:17There you go
31:19There they are
31:20Who's Paul Varney?
31:21Hang on, let's try something
31:22Oi, Paul
31:26Number two
31:27Number two
31:29Are we done?
31:30Yeah
31:31Do you know what, mate?
31:32Make sure it's suspicious
31:33Without
31:34Without anything said
31:36We all
31:37We all said number two instantly
31:38Without anything
31:39Yeah, I felt that when he came out
31:40But then when I heard the voice
31:43That could be the voice of number four
31:45Nah, number four ain't got a rockstar face
31:47He looks like he's lots gonna change when that one galone come through
31:50I'm gonna get me a van we're selling stew
31:55All right, shall we eliminate? I don't think it's number one
32:00I want to say number one but he looks like he lacks confidence like he walks the long way home because there's kids sitting on the wall
32:05It's not number three because I've seen him in the line-up about twelve times before
32:17He's here every week
32:18He's here every week
32:19I've got to say three, four and five have got incredibly long necks
32:23Yeah, they have, ain't they?
32:24Yeah
32:25What about they eat apples from the top of the tree, isn't that?
32:27Yeah
32:29I'll give you some facts about him
32:30Yeah, go on
32:31Here we go
32:32Strap yourselves in
32:33Then, as a child, Paul was one of the Milky Bar kids
32:38Oh, hang on
32:39Walk over there and see if any of them smell of anything milky and creamy
32:42I don't...
32:44No, no, no
32:46You're so creepy
32:49I don't want to, Jay, you've made me nervous
32:52I'll have to push you, boys
32:54Captain, make a decision
32:55You're the captain
32:57We're all confused
32:58I was two, then five, now I've gone three
33:00One's in the Lars, it's not one
33:02We don't, we've gone off two
33:03Three's been in the line-up before, it's not three
33:06Four standing like he doesn't give a fuck
33:08He's never, ever been in a Milky Bar ever
33:11Number five, number five
33:12Noel's team have decided it's number five
33:14Let's find out if they're right
33:15Well, the real Paul Varney, please step forward
33:19Oh, what?
33:20Ah
33:22It's Paul Varney
33:23It's Paul Varney
33:27Thank you, John
33:29Thank you
33:30Thank you
33:31That was really beautiful
33:32Well, Steve, you were wrong
33:34It was number four
33:35Paul, hello
33:36Welcome to the show
33:37Thank you
33:38What are you up to these days?
33:39I've just started a record label, house music label
33:40And still releasing music as a solo artist
33:42That's it
33:43Awesome
33:44Thank you, boys
33:45Thank you, Paul
33:47Thanks, boys
33:48Thanks, boys
33:49Thank you
33:50Let's hear it for Paul and the rest of the boys
33:52CHEERING
33:53CHEERING
33:55And at the end of that round, both teams have three points each
34:01CHEERING
34:02CHEERING
34:03Right, we're going straight into next line
34:06straight into next line Sophie's team you're up first and your time starts now
34:13I want to kiss you every minute every hour every day okay you've got me in a
34:18spin but everything is okay the darkness I believe in a thing called love gravity
34:22keeps pulling me down correct some writer spaceman she's just a cosmic
34:28girl in a cosmic world nope from another galaxy Jamiroquai cosmic girl these
34:34words are my own from my heart flow correct Natasha Bedingfield these words
34:41bring your daughter to the slaughter
34:48correct I made him bring your daughter to the slaughter what's in your head in your
34:51head zombie you acting kind of shady ain't calling me baby
35:04why the sudden change better say my name Destiny's Child say my name
35:11because I may be bad
35:13well done team you've got four right all right Noel and six
35:23here are yours you need five points to win you could actually win one we could win
35:29come on then with Castro
35:35your time starts now love me love me say that you love me
35:39say that you love me
35:41do me do me do me come on and call me call me call me call me call me call me call me
35:44call me call me call me the cardigans love full
35:46Babe, I swear you will succumb to me
35:52Five when the lights go out. We're so pretty oh so pretty
35:56Vacant sex pistols pretty vacant. Well, you can tell by the way I use my wall
36:03Staying alive, and I love to live so pleasantly
36:10Luxury the kinks on the afternoon I kissed a girl and I liked it
36:16Yes, Katie Perry. I kissed a girl. He was a boy. She was a girl
36:20Can I make it any more obvious?
36:22Can I make it any more obvious? Avril Lavigne's skater boy
36:32It's the end of the show and I can tell you the sophie's team have seven points, but with unbelievably eight points
36:38No
36:46I know Jamali, Sam Ryder, Sophie and Natasha. Good night!
37:16I'm
37:18I'm
37:22you
37:24You
37:26You
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