French Lesbian Movie 15d

Aliyan369

#hollywood #lesbian#beauty #lesbian #frenchmovies #japanesemovies #hitmovies #hitmovie #i #fans #koreanmovie #lgbt #chinesemovies  #gaypride #trending #bollywood #love #instagram #india #trending #instagood #tollywood #bollywoodactress #fashion ##blockbuster #movie #movies #cinema #film  #bollywood #hot #model #love  #beauty #cute #gay  #gym #legs #fashion #photography #instagram

Transcript

00:00:00I've not been myself through this dry spell, no, no

00:00:09Then it happened, I reckon you recall

00:00:14I caught you laughing, in the face of a wrecking ball

00:00:18You gave an okay sign, and blew my mind forever

00:00:25I just had to let you know, that even if you need to go

00:00:34We'll always have the Union Hall, I'll always love you most of all

00:01:08Thank you

00:01:09Does your mom have a favorite flower?

00:01:12She loves those red Gerber flowers

00:01:18Do you have a favorite flower?

00:01:21I don't know

00:01:23Well, when you dated people in the past, what kind of flower, um, what kind of flower did they give

00:01:29you?

00:01:30I think I've given more flowers than I've received

00:01:34What?

00:01:35Really?

00:01:36Yes

00:01:37No

00:01:37Yes

00:01:39Well, you have to let me be the one to give you flowers

00:01:50I don't understand people

00:01:52Who steals a doormat?

00:01:54How you doing?

00:01:55Um, I'm missing doormats and losing my mind

00:01:59You know what I'm saying

00:02:00This is your first Thanksgiving, not too bad

00:02:03Hey

00:02:05Hey

00:02:06Why are you huddled outside my door?

00:02:09Why are you coming to the office to pay, sweetie?

00:02:11I'm waiting for my daughter to come and bring me the cash

00:02:14I'll bring it tomorrow

00:02:15Tomorrow's Thanksgiving

00:02:16She's...

00:02:18Excuse me

00:02:19Can I...

00:02:20Can I help you?

00:02:21I don't know

00:02:22Who are you?

00:02:23Rose

00:02:24This is my motel

00:02:26Oh

00:02:28Yeah

00:02:29I'm just lost

00:02:31Okay

00:02:31Thought it was a diner, but

00:02:33No

00:02:34All good

00:02:35Thanks

00:02:37Bye

00:02:43What the hell was that?

00:02:45I've seen that van before

00:02:47You've got to tell me this stuff

00:02:49What stuff?

00:02:50Suspicious stuff

00:02:51Your brother

00:02:52Is the most suspicious thing around here

00:02:55That's true

00:02:57All right

00:03:04I like you in an apron

00:03:06Don't get used to it

00:03:07So I've been thinking about something

00:03:10Oh yeah, what?

00:03:11I think maybe you and I should go on a trip

00:03:16Oh yeah, where do you want to go?

00:03:19I don't know

00:03:19Maybe somewhere for me

00:03:21Ladies, are we interrupting something?

00:03:24This is Mimi

00:03:25Hi

00:03:26Uh Mimi, this is my roommate Lauren and Haley

00:03:29I have to pay

00:03:31Uh, I'm sorry

00:03:32The bathroom is down the hall

00:03:40Some smells good

00:03:41What are we cooking now?

00:03:42Berry crumble for tomorrow

00:03:43What are your Thanksgiving plans?

00:03:45What are you doing?

00:03:46Mimi invited me to a potluck in Brooklyn with some friends

00:03:49So, I don't know

00:03:50I'm weighing my options

00:03:50Oh

00:03:51Yeah

00:03:54No, no, no, no

00:03:55Stop

00:03:55Hey, Mrs. Anderson

00:03:56No, no

00:03:57Yeah

00:03:57Wait, wait, Austin

00:03:58Seriously

00:03:59Give me the phone

00:04:00Oh, why thank you

00:04:01Give me the phone

00:04:19I'm gonna check the crumble

00:04:41I'm gonna check the crumble

00:04:48I'm eating blueberry pie

00:04:50First of all, it's only 147 calories per slice

00:04:53Yeah

00:04:53Second of all, it's a super food

00:04:56And you're a super man, but it's for tomorrow

00:04:59Not this slice

00:05:01Okay, did you watch the turkey carving video?

00:05:05Well, I did and I didn't

00:05:08Dad always carve the turkey

00:05:10Oh, come here

00:05:11I know

00:05:12I'll watch the video, I promise

00:05:14And I miss him, too

00:05:15He's the only one that would fight me for the dark meat

00:05:19Please watch the video

00:05:20I will, I swear

00:05:20I mean, how else am I going to know how to carve a dumb turkey?

00:05:23I still love you, though

00:05:25Yeah, I love you, too

00:05:30What are we supposed to do with that?

00:05:40No

00:05:41Hey, Mom

00:05:42You didn't call me back

00:05:44Uh, sorry

00:05:45Austin sent a smoked turkey again

00:05:48I'm making my turkey, too

00:05:49How much turkey does he think we eat?

00:05:51I have no idea

00:05:52I mean, he's not even coming this year

00:05:53What's with the Wi-Fi?

00:05:55You know, sweetie

00:05:55Technologically, that doesn't do anything

00:05:58So, did you have a nice night?

00:05:59Uh, yeah

00:06:00Just hanging out with Haley

00:06:01When are we meeting the boyfriend?

00:06:03Soon

00:06:04When soon?

00:06:05Mom

00:06:06When are you and your friend coming tomorrow?

00:06:08I need a game plan

00:06:09I don't like surprises

00:06:10I'm coming at, like, ten

00:06:12She's coming a little later

00:06:13Okay, okay

00:06:14I love you, bye

00:06:15Mwah

00:06:15I love you, too

00:06:16Bye

00:06:19Mwah

00:06:21She doesn't like surprises

00:06:23Surprise?

00:06:23Guys, I'm not a boyfriend

00:06:25Right

00:06:26What should I wear tomorrow?

00:06:28Um, I don't know

00:06:29Dressed casual, comfortable

00:06:31My family's super comfortable

00:06:33Pajamas?

00:06:34Funny

00:06:35What are you gonna say to them?

00:06:36Uh, Mom, Dad, I have a girlfriend

00:06:39She'll be here, like, real soon

00:06:41Are you sure you don't want me to come with you?

00:06:43Yeah

00:06:44I don't want to bombard them

00:06:58Mediate

00:07:00Gratification

00:07:02In the digital age

00:07:05What a shame

00:07:07You can go

00:07:10Right out of your mind

00:07:13Searching for substance

00:07:16In this empty life

00:07:19Whoa

00:07:21Where will we go?

00:07:24Whoa

00:07:27God bless our soul

00:07:29Whoa

00:07:31Whoa

00:07:32Whoa

00:07:33Whoa

00:07:35Did you watch the video yet?

00:07:37I'm on it

00:07:39I want grandchildren

00:07:41Okay

00:07:42I don't want to be 80 chasing around a five-year-old

00:07:44No

00:07:45I'm still vivacious

00:07:46Yes, you are

00:07:48How do we get old?

00:07:49Nobody's old

00:07:50Who's old?

00:07:52Just yesterday I was getting high and listening to the Beatles

00:07:55Well, yeah

00:07:55That's what you did

00:07:56Lauren's walking?

00:07:58Why would she walk?

00:07:59I have no idea

00:08:00Who walks?

00:08:11What are you doing?

00:08:12Why didn't you call for a ride?

00:08:13Sorry, I just wanted to walk clear my head

00:08:15It's doing a round of beads chanting

00:08:17All right, well, let me help my favorite daughter

00:08:19Only daughter

00:08:20A little heads up

00:08:21Your mama's just talking about grandchildren

00:08:23What grandchildren?

00:08:25Exactly

00:08:25What are you chanting?

00:08:26Hari Krishna

00:08:27If I see you with a tambourine begging for money

00:08:30I swear to God

00:08:31Mom

00:08:33Oh, God, do you think we can hide this today?

00:08:36Um, Mom, I'm in a relationship

00:08:40Right, that mystery, man

00:08:42You're embarrassed to bring home

00:08:43Help me with the carrots

00:08:44Before we get going with the carrots

00:08:46I want to talk to you about

00:08:47Yes, tell me, tell me, tell me

00:08:48I keep asking

00:08:49Well, I wanted to make sure it was serious

00:08:52And?

00:08:53It's, you know

00:08:54What are you doing?

00:08:55I'm just checking

00:08:56Oh, you see what he's doing?

00:08:57He's checking his stash

00:08:59Stash?

00:08:59Of cookies

00:09:00He wants to see how many I've eaten

00:09:02I found the most amazing lemon cookie

00:09:04Unfortunately, she also loves them

00:09:06The woman can whack a box in a day

00:09:08Oh, excuse you

00:09:09I do not

00:09:11Peel

00:09:11Talk and peel

00:09:12You know, it's important for you guys to know

00:09:14That, like, having feelings for someone

00:09:16It can take you by surprise

00:09:18I mean, that you might not expect

00:09:20I mean, it took me by surprise

00:09:21Right

00:09:22And so, I was thinking that

00:09:25What the

00:09:25Who the hell could that be?

00:09:27If your parents are four hours early

00:09:28I will literally scream

00:09:30Can you get that?

00:09:32Just

00:09:32I

00:09:32Can you

00:09:33Oh

00:09:35They did this before

00:09:36When?

00:09:39365 days ago

00:09:43What are you doing?

00:09:44Just stretching it out

00:09:45Last night was a feat of physical deserity

00:09:48With Mimi

00:09:48No, what are you doing here?

00:09:50You can't be here

00:09:51Yeah, your mom invited me

00:09:52When?

00:09:52Last night, on the phone

00:09:53She said if I

00:09:54My plans fell through

00:09:55I was more than welcome to come and join you guys

00:09:56You're not

00:09:57What happened to the father?

00:09:58I don't want Mimi thinking I want anything serious

00:10:00Besides, Thanksgiving alone would be so depressing

00:10:02And your family loves you

00:10:03What do you think I'm trying to come out?

00:10:05On Thanksgiving?

00:10:06Yeah, that's pretty crazy

00:10:09Austin!

00:10:09Hey!

00:10:10I didn't know you were coming

00:10:11Surprise!

00:10:12Oh, this is great

00:10:13Did you get the turkey?

00:10:15No wonder you sent the turkey

00:10:17Okay, I understand

00:10:20Oh, no

00:10:20Austin

00:10:21Come on in

00:10:22Make yourself at home

00:10:24That turkey was very thoughtful

00:10:26See, I'm thoughtful

00:10:28This is so great

00:10:30No, he's not the boyfriend

00:10:30How did this happen?

00:10:32No, no, no

00:10:33This is great

00:10:34I love him

00:10:34Mom, no, no

00:10:35Isn't there a song like

00:10:37Are you my best friend?

00:10:39Are you my lover?

00:10:40I don't know that song

00:10:41Isn't there a song like that?

00:10:41No

00:10:42Oh, my God

00:10:43This is great

00:10:48Honey, Mr. Anderson

00:10:53Okay, Lauren

00:10:55I need your focus

00:10:56Mom, I need your focus

00:10:58Peel

00:10:58Oh, what are you doing?

00:11:00Having breakfast

00:11:01Pie is not breakfast

00:11:03Blueberries

00:11:03With sugar

00:11:04And butter

00:11:05Talk sense into your father

00:11:07That pie is not breakfast

00:11:08So good

00:11:09I can't serve that now

00:11:11Are you eating meat these days?

00:11:13No, Mom

00:11:13I was really hoping that was a phase

00:11:15What are you doing?

00:11:18Guys

00:11:18I really need to talk to the two of you alone

00:11:20Whatever you have to say

00:11:21You can say it in front of Austin

00:11:22He's family

00:11:23I mean, Izzy

00:11:24That's a legitimate question

00:11:25Oh, sweetie

00:11:27You can't just dump

00:11:28You need to measure

00:11:30Okay

00:11:31What's on your mind?

00:11:32Talk, talk, talk

00:11:34Last night

00:11:34Haley and I went to this Alpaca

00:11:36Yeah, I saw a picture on Instagram

00:11:38I liked it

00:11:38Yeah, you are all over my social media

00:11:40What is that?

00:11:40What is that supposed to mean?

00:11:41Nothing

00:11:42I gotta get a broom

00:11:44You went to an Alpaca meeting?

00:11:46Alpaca

00:11:46It's a super pack

00:11:47For lesbians

00:11:48For women in power

00:11:49It's a political power thing

00:11:51Since when are you into politics?

00:11:52And lesbians

00:11:53Can we please stay focused?

00:11:56We went to this Alpaca thing

00:11:57And then we came home

00:11:58And we made this very crumble together

00:12:00You have got to take one of these brooms

00:12:02We just got them at the motel

00:12:04So you're a feminist now

00:12:06I'm just trying to stay informed

00:12:07Oh, Haley's not informing you?

00:12:09That's a bummer

00:12:09Feel it, sweetie

00:12:10Yeah, go on

00:12:11Feel the broom

00:12:14Feel it

00:12:15They gotta feel good

00:12:16When they feel good

00:12:17They pick up all the stuff on the floor

00:12:19I just don't understand why

00:12:20Women have to gather

00:12:20To rally

00:12:22Because you're not a woman

00:12:23Uh-huh

00:12:23Yeah, she can ignore me

00:12:25You can't

00:12:26Yeah, I'll take one

00:12:27Got a broom

00:12:28It's important to keep the home clean

00:12:29Mom, me and Austin

00:12:31We don't have a home

00:12:32We don't have a home

00:12:33I am not against women

00:12:34Oh, my God

00:12:36So why are you yelling?

00:12:37Whatever you have to say

00:12:38We support you, George

00:12:39We love Austin, right?

00:12:41Do we?

00:12:41Austin, come with me now

00:12:42We're going upstairs

00:12:47No wonder you sent the turkey

00:12:49This is very exciting

00:12:50I just wish you would have had the decency

00:12:52To ask

00:12:53Before moving in together

00:12:54They were already

00:12:56Living together, so

00:12:58As roommates

00:12:59But this

00:13:00They're in love

00:13:00Living in sin

00:13:02Sweetie, this is the 21st century

00:13:04These things just happen

00:13:05These things don't just happen

00:13:07To my daughter

00:13:08Fix this

00:13:09And tell them you're a scissors sister?

00:13:11No way

00:13:11No, tell them we're not dating, Austin

00:13:13Tell them you're a lesbian

00:13:14Two birds, one stone

00:13:15This is not funny

00:13:16Okay, come on

00:13:21Take a deep breath

00:13:25Relax

00:13:27You're like

00:13:27A balloon

00:13:29Let me be your strength

00:13:31Baby girl, I'm having a crisis

00:13:32Does this make me look fat?

00:13:34This is fat, right?

00:13:35Don't answer that

00:13:37We're not dating

00:13:37Oh, your father's gonna come around

00:13:40No, no, no

00:13:40Seriously, we're not dating Miss Anderson

00:13:43Promise you

00:13:43He's not the boyfriend

00:13:44Okay

00:13:46Hey, I'm gonna go to the store

00:13:47Oh, good

00:13:47Wait, I need walnuts

00:13:49Sunnybrook yogurt

00:13:49Pistachios for your father

00:13:51And yarrow's burr of cheese

00:13:52That's your favorite, right?

00:13:53Yeah, text it to me

00:13:54Okay

00:13:54End zone

00:13:55You want to come with?

00:14:10I have nothing to wear

00:14:11Nothing fits

00:14:12Your father keeps bringing home cookies

00:14:14Sure looks nice

00:14:15Yeah

00:14:18I'm sad today

00:14:20Without my dad

00:14:21I don't know

00:14:22I'm sorry

00:14:23I miss him too

00:14:24I love you, mom

00:14:26I love you too

00:14:30Okay

00:14:31Text the list

00:14:32Text the list

00:14:34Hey, mom

00:14:35I really gotta talk to you

00:14:36About Haley

00:14:40About Haley?

00:14:41Yeah

00:14:41Okay

00:14:42I understand, though

00:14:43What do you understand?

00:14:45I'm excited to meet your friend

00:14:47But I get it's hard

00:14:48Maintaining friendships

00:14:49When you're in a relationship

00:14:51What are you talking about?

00:14:52I mean, it's hard to be a best friend

00:14:53When someone else takes that place

00:14:55You've had a lot of best friends

00:14:57What?

00:14:58I thought we were best friends

00:15:00But you don't tell me anything anymore

00:15:02I tell you things, mom

00:15:04Tell me how to spell Jarlsberg

00:15:05It's a J

00:15:07J-A-R-L-S-B-E-R

00:15:11J-U-R-G-B-E-R-G

00:15:13Okay, well

00:15:14Haley's at the station now

00:15:16Okay

00:15:16So I guess I'll just go

00:15:18You want me to come?

00:15:20No, how do I look?

00:15:21Do I look okay?

00:15:22Good, you look good

00:15:23What does that mean?

00:15:24For someone who's doing all this meditating

00:15:26You're awfully stressed, sweetie

00:15:27Maybe you're not doing it right

00:15:28Maybe it's reversing your brainwaves

00:15:31In some kind of way

00:15:32You're making it worse, mom

00:15:32Do you want anything

00:15:33While I'm texting your father?

00:15:35No

00:15:36Okay

00:15:54Where's this store?

00:15:57Well, you know, I just thought I'd get you away from the hubbub of the house

00:16:01Have a little chat man-to-man

00:16:04Okay

00:16:04Just had a couple questions

00:16:08How long have you been dating my daughter?

00:16:11Oh, no, no, sir

00:16:13We're not dating

00:16:14Don't lie

00:16:15Oh, no, I'm not lying

00:16:18Okay

00:16:19Let me rephrase

00:16:20How long have you been sleeping with my daughter?

00:16:22Oh

00:16:24Uh, what do you mean?

00:16:27What do I mean?

00:16:30Okay, what was Lauren told you?

00:16:34Nothing gets past me

00:16:37We're not dating

00:16:43You're saying you've never slept with my daughter?

00:16:47Is that what you're saying?

00:16:52Okay, okay, yeah

00:16:53Um

00:16:55Yeah, so we slept together once

00:16:57And, um

00:16:59Never happened again

00:17:00It was just one time

00:17:01And it didn't mean anything

00:17:01It didn't mean anything?

00:17:03Well, I didn't mean like that

00:17:04You know, it's just that we were...

00:17:06You slept with my daughter

00:17:07And it didn't mean anything

00:17:08No, it didn't

00:17:09It meant something

00:17:10It's just we're not dating

00:17:11You better be dating if you're sleeping with my daughter

00:17:14But I, um...

00:17:16Take a look around

00:17:21You see anybody?

00:17:23No

00:17:25You think you'll be missed?

00:17:27What?

00:17:31Ten

00:17:33Nine

00:17:34Oh, God, are you counting down to kill me?

00:17:36Eight

00:17:36Okay, okay

00:17:38Yep

00:17:39Seven

00:17:39Okay, okay, okay

00:17:40Yeah, yeah, yeah

00:17:41We're dating

00:17:42Six

00:17:42We're dating

00:17:43We're dating

00:17:44I, I am, um

00:17:45Five

00:17:45I am obsessed with her

00:17:46I love her

00:17:46She is

00:17:47Four

00:17:47A great human being

00:17:48I think you birthed an amazing

00:17:50Three

00:17:50I'm dating your daughter

00:17:52Okay

00:17:53Man, that's a simple question

00:17:56Just give a straight answer

00:18:07Hey

00:18:08Hi

00:18:09I made it

00:18:12Oh, I got this for your mound

00:18:14Oh, that was really nice

00:18:15And these

00:18:17That was so thoughtful

00:18:20Everything okay?

00:18:22Mm-hmm

00:18:22Yeah

00:18:24So how far is it from here?

00:18:26It's, uh, it's really close

00:18:31So close

00:18:37So, how did it go?

00:18:39You look really nice

00:18:43So, Austin, um

00:18:44I don't want to talk about Austin

00:18:46No, I know, it's just that

00:18:47Lauren, today is about you and me

00:18:49And today is totally still about you and me

00:18:51But I should tell you that Austin

00:18:52Right, so no Austin

00:18:54Okay, but the thing is

00:18:56If you say Austin one more time

00:18:57I'm gonna get out of this car

00:19:10Welcome to my home

00:19:11It's so cute

00:19:12Yeah

00:19:13Um, don't look at that

00:19:14Okay, now I have to

00:19:17Come on

00:19:18Oh, God

00:19:19Oh, wow

00:19:22Yeah

00:19:22This is amazing

00:19:24Hold on to me

00:19:25You must be Haley

00:19:27Hi, um, these are for you

00:19:28Oh, these are my favorite

00:19:30That is so nice

00:19:31It is such a pleasure to finally meet you

00:19:33We've heard so much about you

00:19:34Oh, thank you so much for having me

00:19:36Oh, you're so welcome

00:19:37I was just looking at this amazing collage

00:19:39It's pretty great, right?

00:19:40Yes, it is so embarrassing

00:19:41Oh, it's beautiful

00:19:42She's always beautiful to me

00:19:44Okay

00:19:48Hey, Haley

00:19:49Austin

00:19:49I need to talk to you

00:19:50Here you go

00:19:52Hey

00:19:53Oh, yeah, you went

00:19:53Lumberjack chic, too

00:19:54Come on

00:19:54That's what I'm trying to tell you

00:19:55Wait, over here

00:19:56I'm really sorry

00:19:57What the hell, Austin?

00:20:03Hello

00:20:04I'm George

00:20:04Hi, I'm Haley

00:20:06Pleasure

00:20:07What's Austin doing here?

00:20:08Oh, he just surprised us

00:20:09I might kill him

00:20:10The feeling's mutual

00:20:11Why did you tell your father

00:20:13that we slept together

00:20:14Yes, he was all I could

00:20:15No, he slept with my daughter

00:20:16Did you tell her

00:20:17He knew

00:20:18He's with our daughter in her bedroom

00:20:20I know

00:20:20Um, this is for the two of you

00:20:22Thank you both so much for having me

00:20:24and welcoming me into your home on Thanksgiving

00:20:27Your daughter is amazing

00:20:28I can't tell you how much this means

00:20:30Lauren told me how important you are

00:20:32Aw

00:20:33So tell us about Austin

00:20:34Yeah, what's his deal?

00:20:36Um, he's fine

00:20:37He wants to kill me

00:20:38I'm gonna tell me

00:20:39Kill me

00:20:39I'm gonna kill you

00:20:40I might kill you

00:20:41I may actually kill you

00:20:42This must be tough

00:20:43You get jealous

00:20:44Of Austin

00:20:45It's okay, you can tell me

00:20:47I guess

00:20:48They're just so close

00:20:49Of course, they have a special connection

00:20:51Special to my ass

00:20:52And I understand

00:20:53It's totally natural

00:20:54Well, I don't think I've admitted that before

00:20:57Even to Lauren?

00:20:58Don't worry

00:20:59It'll all work out

00:21:00Yeah

00:21:00When they get married

00:21:01You'll still be close friends

00:21:03Um, what?

00:21:05Me and Austin are not dating

00:21:06Austin and I

00:21:07You were an English major

00:21:08Let's, why don't we go outside

00:21:09Get some fresh air

00:21:10We'll be right back

00:21:11Come on

00:21:15Where the hell's he going?

00:21:16Stop

00:21:20What's he doing here?

00:21:21Uh, yeah

00:21:21I was planning on telling them

00:21:23And then the doorbell rang

00:21:23And my parents just kind of assumed

00:21:25You were getting married

00:21:26He sent a turkey?

00:21:28He sent a turkey?

00:21:29I know, I know

00:21:30Listen, I will make this better

00:21:31I'm okay

00:21:55That is just horrifying

00:21:57What?

00:21:58The neighbors do not need to see this kid's pelvis

00:22:01What are you talking about?

00:22:03I never liked that hair

00:22:04Moving in with some guy off a craigslist

00:22:06Oh, I remember vividly you saying

00:22:08That kid's got a good head on his shoulders

00:22:10Remember?

00:22:10Knock that head off

00:22:11Oh, you don't like any more

00:22:12It's boyfriends

00:22:13Remember that nice kid, Johnny?

00:22:14You gave him PTSD

00:22:15Johnny was a bum

00:22:18Meanwhile, we invited Austin

00:22:19Into our home for Thanksgiving

00:22:20And he clearly deceived us

00:22:22With his intentions

00:22:22How could you not fall in love

00:22:24With our daughter?

00:22:25He's got her lying to us

00:22:26She never lied to us

00:22:29Sweetie

00:22:31Do you think

00:22:33She's pregnant?

00:22:39Where's your sharpener?

00:22:41No, no, no, no

00:22:52What?

00:22:54It's my grandparents

00:22:57So we're playing straight today

00:22:59They're not listening to me

00:23:03Maybe they'll listen to you

00:23:04Why don't you give it a try?

00:23:06Go tell them

00:23:07What?

00:23:08You go tell my parents

00:23:10No

00:23:10Okay

00:23:11I just met them

00:23:12I am not coming out for you

00:23:15Austin

00:23:16Oh, what a surprise

00:23:18Hello

00:23:19Anderson grandparents

00:23:20Call me Josephine

00:23:22Grandpa gets it done

00:23:23And don't you worry

00:23:25I got your smoked turkey

00:23:27He's arm in arm with your grandma

00:23:30I am not with Austin

00:23:31I am with you

00:23:33Okay?

00:23:34They're going to love you

00:23:35Come on

00:23:35Walk along like you know how to

00:23:37I'm waiting for you, bitch

00:23:39I can walk

00:23:40Oh, good, okay

00:23:42Well, keep up

00:23:44You're going to be the death of me

00:23:46Well, the death of you

00:23:47You'll feel your cholesterol

00:23:48Oh, really?

00:23:49Did you ever hear of Lipitor?

00:23:52Lepicor

00:23:53Lipitor, Lipitor

00:23:54Ask your doctor

00:23:55Should I get some?

00:23:57Jesus Christ

00:23:57What are the side effects?

00:24:00Death

00:24:04Keep walking

00:24:05You don't have to wait for me

00:24:07I don't need a helper

00:24:08Well, you need something

00:24:13Let's go in there

00:24:14So that they can see you

00:24:15By my side

00:24:17And they can process it

00:24:18And I'll clear this all up

00:24:20All right?

00:24:23Fine

00:24:29Happy Thanksgiving

00:24:32Happy Thanksgiving

00:24:34I'm so happy

00:24:35Everyone's early

00:24:37You wore those pants again

00:24:39Look at them

00:24:40Yeah

00:24:40Yes, I did

00:24:41Well, thank heaven

00:24:43I didn't dress up

00:24:44Well, they're very comfortable

00:24:45Yeah, they're very heinous

00:24:47They may be heinous

00:24:48But, uh

00:24:49Something smells awfully good

00:24:51Well, this is so great

00:24:54Because, you know,

00:24:55Your son ate the entire pie

00:24:57I was wanting to serve for breakfast

00:24:59Oh, pie is okay for breakfast

00:25:01Maybe everyone can congregate in the living room

00:25:04Austin sent me one of those smoked turkeys

00:25:06Now I'm excited about Thanksgiving

00:25:08Mm-hmm

00:25:09That's good

00:25:09This man ate a whole pie?

00:25:11Part of a pie

00:25:12She's exaggerating

00:25:13Pig

00:25:13Uh, everyone, can I have your attention?

00:25:16We're dating

00:25:17Yes

00:25:18Austin and Lauren are dating

00:25:20Oh, no, no

00:25:21You're misunderstanding

00:25:22Oh, that's wonderful

00:25:23No, Grandma, stop it

00:25:24No, Grandma, stop it

00:25:25No, Grandma, stop it

00:25:25No, no, no, no, no, no

00:25:26It's not what you think

00:25:27But it's very meaningful

00:25:29There's just a bit of confusion here

00:25:31Yeah, listen

00:25:31Do you work with Laura?

00:25:32Yeah, a little

00:25:34Haley is a lawyer

00:25:35Um, she actually makes money

00:25:37So do you

00:25:37How's the writing coming?

00:25:39Bet you got a whole lot of new material now

00:25:42Her writing's going really well

00:25:44Tell them

00:25:45What kind of law?

00:25:46Uh, environmental law

00:25:47All about shrubbery and bushes

00:25:48I love shrubbery

00:25:50I don't know anything about environmental law

00:25:52I learn something new every day

00:25:54As did I, madam

00:25:55The day I married you till today

00:25:58What's the newest thing you learned?

00:26:00You, ma'am, have major games

00:26:02All right, you two, get a room

00:26:03Um, Haley and I met in yoga

00:26:05Thought you weren't supposed to talk in yoga

00:26:08Well, she hates rules

00:26:09Haley is not my friend

00:26:10She's your best friend

00:26:11I like that, that picture of you two on Instagram last night

00:26:15That was just talking about the alpaca vet

00:26:16Yeah

00:26:17Uh, lesbians for women in power

00:26:19Yeah, we got a bunch of feminists in the house

00:26:21Are you two wearing the same shirt?

00:26:23Okay, come with me

00:26:27Okay, that's great

00:26:28Excuse me

00:26:29Here goes two

00:26:35They're not listening

00:26:36I told you

00:26:37No, like, they're really not listening

00:26:39I mean, okay

00:26:40They're still my family

00:26:46What?

00:26:48Jesus Christ

00:26:48How many times do I have to knock before somebody answers the door?

00:26:51What's with the girl in the van?

00:26:53Oh, Jesus Christ

00:26:54Happy Thanksgiving to you two

00:26:55Mike! Mike! Mike! Mike! Mike! Mike!

00:26:56What?

00:26:57You heard me

00:26:58I don't even know what you're talking about

00:27:00Oh, I don't believe you

00:27:01Where's the cranberry sauce?

00:27:03What?

00:27:04I asked you to bring one

00:27:05I don't want

00:27:05Oh, wait, hold on

00:27:06I brought wine

00:27:07Oh, great

00:27:08I brought wine

00:27:09So we're drinking again

00:27:10That makes me happy

00:27:12So this is your bedroom

00:27:14And this is it

00:27:17I'm so glad we're sharing this moment with Austin

00:27:19No one wants to out you guys more than me right now

00:27:22Why exactly are you here?

00:27:23How was I supposed to know you were going to drop the lesbomb today?

00:27:26Why did you send a turkey?

00:27:28Because her grandmother liked it last year

00:27:31You're deliberately trying to sabotage me

00:27:33Shut up!

00:27:35Both of you

00:27:35Go with the flow

00:27:37And when the right moment presents itself

00:27:39I will tell them we are in a relationship

00:27:42Okay

00:27:44But listen, you just have to rip off that band-aid

00:27:47I didn't want there to be any ripping

00:27:49I know

00:27:50That's not how it was supposed to happen

00:27:52Oh, I know

00:27:54Sorry

00:27:55Hey, it's going to be okay

00:28:03So this is your bedroom?

00:28:05This is my bedroom

00:28:08All of this was made here

00:28:11How did you even fit on the bed with all these stuffed animals?

00:28:14I don't know

00:28:15I'm actually not sure

00:28:18Who's this guy?

00:28:19This is Teddy

00:28:20I lacked imagination

00:28:23This is, like, quite the introduction to six-year-old Lauren

00:28:26Oh, I'm sorry

00:28:28It's okay

00:28:30Hey, Mom!

00:28:32Happy Thanksgiving!

00:28:33Give me go!

00:28:34It smells so good in here

00:28:35You look so handsome

00:28:37Really?

00:28:38Yes, I really like this hair

00:28:39Why don't I have a girlfriend, then?

00:28:41This deserves a girlfriend

00:28:42It's so touchable

00:28:43What's up?

00:28:44I did bring a little bit of laundry

00:28:46Oh, how great I love you

00:28:47But I don't know how to do it

00:28:49So I thought, you know

00:28:50You'd do it

00:28:51Oh, good ass, isn't it?

00:28:52It's all good

00:28:57Dashing through the snow

00:29:00Honey, one holiday at a time, please

00:29:03Can I have my phone back now?

00:29:04Jess

00:29:06Would you give her the phone back?

00:29:07Don't make me the bad cop

00:29:09You are the bad cop

00:29:10Hey, don't push her

00:29:12Thank you

00:29:17Hey, here we go

00:29:18Let's have a good time

00:29:24Can I please have my phone now?

00:29:26No

00:29:27And don't slam the door

00:29:29Can we just eat some food and give thanks?

00:29:32How?

00:29:32I'm not thankful

00:29:33How about giving thanks for me birthing you?

00:29:36Push your child out of your vagina for 32 hours

00:29:38You won't be crying about that phone

00:29:40Mom, don't say vagina

00:29:40And don't mention the spinach dip

00:29:45Hey, the good guys are here

00:29:48Hey

00:29:48Hey, how are you?

00:29:50I'm very, very well made

00:29:53Oh, there, beautiful lady

00:29:55Happy Thanksgiving, Mom

00:29:57Kiss her on the lips

00:29:58I love you

00:29:59Hey, tough guy, how you doing?

00:30:01I'm doing great

00:30:02Yeah?

00:30:02I feel great

00:30:03I got the appetite back

00:30:04How do I look?

00:30:05Like a hundred damn dollars

00:30:06You actually asked him if he felt good?

00:30:08Look at the woman's face that he brought with him

00:30:11How could you not feel good?

00:30:12Pop, come on

00:30:13Jessica

00:30:14Hi, Mike

00:30:15Maggie

00:30:16Cool gang is here

00:30:18Great, this is Sally

00:30:20Don't you eat meat?

00:30:22No, thanks

00:30:22I actually don't eat meat

00:30:23Oh

00:30:24Are you a vegetarian?

00:30:26Yeah

00:30:26Wait, you're the one that turned my daughter vegetarian?

00:30:30No, actually she turned me vegetarian

00:30:32She doesn't eat meat

00:30:33She doesn't eat meat

00:30:33But she eats pie

00:30:34So do you

00:30:35Mom, can I have my phone?

00:30:37Not until you learn that my privacy is my privacy

00:30:40She has taken to filming me in the bathroom

00:30:42Enough?

00:30:42Mm-hmm

00:30:43On the toilet, in the shower, waxing

00:30:45Shwezing

00:30:46Oh my God

00:30:47Well, that's flattering

00:30:48Oh

00:30:49That's it, right?

00:30:50You're a evil spawn

00:30:52Real flattering

00:30:53Somebody said there was going to be turkey

00:30:56You already

00:30:57Oh yeah, it's hilarious

00:30:57You really are

00:30:59You should have some wine

00:31:00I don't want wine

00:31:01It's a bottle that Haley brought

00:31:02You shut up

00:31:04Great

00:31:04Is there a reason you don't want wine?

00:31:07The specific reason

00:31:08Do you like drinking?

00:31:10That's it

00:31:10Dad, I don't want wine

00:31:12Uncle George, I'll hug you

00:31:13Do you want the wine?

00:31:14No

00:31:14I'm thinking you might want some

00:31:15Lauren, can you grab me some extra oven mitts from downstairs?

00:31:18Oh, I'll go get them

00:31:19Lauren, can you show Haley where the extra oven mitts are?

00:31:22Mom, can you ask Dad why he's being crazy?

00:31:24She doesn't want any wine

00:31:25Where the hell is the turkey?

00:31:27Hey, man, I'm with Pa

00:31:28Let's eat

00:31:28It's roast meat

00:31:29I need to talk to you

00:31:32Okay

00:31:33You need to drink that wine

00:31:34I'm getting drunk, so I'm not going to fix anything

00:31:36They think you're pregnant

00:31:38No

00:31:38Oh yeah, they think you came home to tell them you're in a relationship with Austin

00:31:42And you're pregnant

00:31:43Congratulations

00:31:45Oh my God

00:31:46I just need to get my mom alone for like a minute

00:31:50Is someone smoking pot?

00:31:52I don't think so, I mean nobody smokes

00:31:57What?

00:32:03My uncle is smoking weed in my mom's bathroom

00:32:06My uncle, my mom used to live down here and my uncle's in there smoking and shaving

00:32:10My mom's going to kill him

00:32:11Why is he shaving?

00:32:12Why is he smoking?

00:32:14Ask if he wants to share?

00:32:15That's not funny

00:32:16I'm not joking

00:32:17I'll be right back

00:32:18No, just give me, just give me five minutes

00:32:20No

00:32:20Just give me five

00:32:20Please

00:32:21Please just give me five minutes

00:32:23I'm just talking to my mom

00:32:24You get one minute

00:32:26Oh my gosh, you look so cute in that dress

00:32:27I like you in a photo

00:32:30Relax

00:32:31I'll be right back

00:32:39Oh, quick

00:32:40Lauren

00:32:41No, not right now

00:32:42You're a friend

00:32:42No

00:32:42Yeah, yeah

00:32:43We had a connection

00:32:44There was no connection

00:32:45Tell me one thing

00:32:45What kind of guys does she change?

00:32:47She is unavailable

00:32:49Hey, listen

00:32:51Mike's smoking weed in my pop-ups bathroom

00:32:53Is he going to share?

00:32:54John

00:32:55What?

00:32:55What do you want me to do about it?

00:32:57I just need everyone to put her shit together for five seconds

00:32:58We'll talk to mom

00:32:59Can you just help me do that?

00:33:00That's fair

00:33:01She's in the kitchen, you know

00:33:02Basting away

00:33:04Okay

00:33:06No

00:33:06Where are you going?

00:33:07Stay

00:33:07I just want to have a stimulating conversation with somebody

00:33:09She seems smart

00:33:10I'll see you later

00:33:14Here

00:33:15What the hell?

00:33:16This cannot be right

00:33:17According to this, the turkey's done

00:33:19According to this, we ate it already

00:33:22Vegetarian or not

00:33:23You need to try the smoked turkey, Lauren

00:33:26Was a gift from your boyfriend

00:33:28It wasn't

00:33:29No, she's going to try meat

00:33:30It's going to be my meat

00:33:32Can you at least try my gravy?

00:33:33I'm not trying meat today

00:33:33Oh, yes, you are

00:33:34You're trying this gravy

00:33:35You really want to

00:33:36How about I try it

00:33:36And then we go talk

00:33:37We're talking right now

00:33:38We're not talking yet

00:33:39Mmm

00:33:40It's so good, right?

00:33:41It's really good

00:33:42Why?

00:33:43Mmm

00:33:44This is the best one I have ever made

00:33:47Mmm

00:33:49That is great

00:33:50Rose

00:33:50Yeah

00:33:51I hate to tell you

00:33:52You don't fry with olive oil

00:33:56No, I learned that

00:33:57Well, they told us about it in Greece

00:34:00Never

00:34:01Okay

00:34:02We're in New Jersey

00:34:03Canola oil

00:34:04Or coconut oil

00:34:06Really?

00:34:07Huh

00:34:08You know, when I was a young girl

00:34:09And I had an itchy lady garden

00:34:12Excuse me

00:34:12I'd put just a drop of olive oil

00:34:14On a cotton swab

00:34:15And pat it down there

00:34:17Oh, my God

00:34:20That's so great

00:34:21How often would you do that?

00:34:23Every single time

00:34:26Have you ever had an itch down there?

00:34:28Never

00:34:29That's never happened

00:34:29Mom, I need my phone

00:34:31I need to film this

00:34:31Oh, yeah, but that's not happening

00:34:33Because you and your friends

00:34:33Do too much of that snatching of

00:34:35Snap, snapping

00:34:36Of drugs and naked pictures

00:34:37I'm not doing any of that

00:34:38Okay, whatever

00:34:38All I'm saying is your generation

00:34:40Is over-sexualized

00:34:41No, that was never Lauren

00:34:44What?

00:34:44You were an angel

00:34:46Do you remember

00:34:47When you asked me what this meant?

00:34:49I literally want to die

00:34:50Wait, what?

00:34:51Some brat at school did that

00:34:53And she wanted to know

00:34:54What he was talking about, right?

00:34:55Can we stop making that motion

00:34:57Forever?

00:34:58This?

00:34:58You?

00:34:59No

00:34:59Mom, let me live my life, okay?

00:35:01Tell them about this

00:35:02Pin the bottom

00:35:03Mom, this is not a roast

00:35:04Lauren called me

00:35:06In seventh grade

00:35:08It was

00:35:09Sixth grade

00:35:09It was seventh grade

00:35:10And everybody was playing

00:35:12Spin the bottle

00:35:13Right?

00:35:14I didn't want my first kiss

00:35:15To be with some random guy

00:35:17Right, and you called me

00:35:19Your mom

00:35:19I snuck off and called my mom

00:35:21And asked her if I should play

00:35:22What'd she say?

00:35:23What'd you say?

00:35:23I said, you should do whatever

00:35:25You feel comfortable doing

00:35:27But you hang up the phone

00:35:28And don't tell anyone you called

00:35:30Aw, loser

00:35:32Yes, I was not cool

00:35:34I miss those days

00:35:35You told me everything

00:35:38I just have some clarification

00:35:40You and Austin

00:35:41Not together

00:35:42Why are you keeping it secret?

00:35:45I'm not keeping it a secret

00:35:46I've been trying to tell everyone

00:35:48We're not together

00:35:48I got an idea

00:35:50Put it in your hand

00:35:51And pray

00:35:52And pray to God

00:35:54That someday

00:35:55You figure out

00:35:57That you can get your shit together

00:36:01Put that rosary away

00:36:02Put it away

00:36:04Why?

00:36:05We only use it for important things

00:36:06God belongs in your house

00:36:08Every day of your life, lady

00:36:11We're not talking about God right now

00:36:12We're talking about your rosary

00:36:14Jessica, do you have a boyfriend?

00:36:15Change your subject

00:36:16I'm so into lacrosse players

00:36:17Is Austin a lacrosse player?

00:36:20Lacrosse?

00:36:20Where do you see lacrosse players?

00:36:22You don't know what I do?

00:36:24Rose, I need more

00:36:25Where are you going?

00:36:26I need more chairs

00:36:26They're in the basement

00:36:27Mike's smoking weed down there

00:36:30What?

00:36:30How is that surprising?

00:36:32What are you chewing?

00:36:33Nothing, I'm not chewing

00:36:33Look at that

00:36:35One of my cookies

00:36:39Mike!

00:36:40What?

00:36:41What the hell are you doing?

00:36:44I'm shaving

00:36:45I smell weed

00:36:46I'm shaving

00:36:47You're smoking in our deceased father's bathroom

00:36:49It's all in your head

00:36:50I'm telling you, Rose

00:36:51Stop it

00:36:53Rose, what are you laughing at?

00:36:56I'm kind of worried about you

00:36:56You don't look normal right now

00:36:58You don't look normal

00:36:59You are too

00:37:00No, I'm kind of depressed

00:37:02I don't know what?

00:37:03Yeah, that is called being an adult

00:37:05You look like Grandma

00:37:06You look just like Grandma

00:37:07I am still going to kill you

00:37:09God damn it

00:37:11I have had it

00:37:12I am not

00:37:13Your god damn mother

00:37:16Right over there

00:37:18I saw Lauren kiss

00:37:22Lauren's dating Austin

00:37:25Kids these days think they can have their gluten-free cake and eat it too

00:37:30Oh, what should we do about it?

00:37:32You do nothing

00:37:33I'll handle this

00:37:38You put those hands on me, you get bossy and it turns me on still

00:37:47So, no meat at all?

00:37:49Nope

00:37:49Where do you get your protein?

00:37:51Oh, Haley eats fish

00:37:53Oh, right

00:37:54Yeah, yeah

00:37:54So there's a name for that

00:37:56It's a pescatarian

00:37:58You're a pescatarian

00:37:59No, I'm not

00:38:00Semantics

00:38:01Maybe I should be a pescatarian

00:38:02Hey!

00:38:03We're just talking about Haley's meat-eating habits

00:38:05Austin's telling your brother he ate fish

00:38:07What do you think about that, Lauren?

00:38:08Gosh, it starts with a P

00:38:09No, pescatarian

00:38:11I'm pretty sure that's

00:38:12No, it's not

00:38:12Am I wrong?

00:38:13That's not it

00:38:13Lauren?

00:38:16Lauren?

00:38:17I'm sorry, I'm sorry

00:38:18P pescatarian

00:38:19I'll tell you later

00:38:20I want to make sure you're comfortable, you know?

00:38:22Me casa, it's your house

00:38:24Thanks

00:38:25Yeah

00:38:25You play lacrosse?

00:38:27Yeah, in high school

00:38:29Nice

00:38:31Lauren!

00:38:33What's going on, Bernie?

00:38:34You never bring the side dish with the main dish

00:38:37Huh?

00:38:38You don't think I know what's going on?

00:38:41You and Haley?

00:38:42Yes

00:38:42Me and Haley

00:38:44Yeah

00:38:45Wow

00:38:46I didn't think that you'd be the first person to figure that out

00:38:49You guys just share your vegetarian plates and throw meat in when you feel like it

00:38:53Wait, what?

00:38:54You, Haley, Austin

00:38:55I don't care what you do in your own personal time

00:38:58But you don't bring the side dish with the main course home for the holidays

00:39:01No, no, no

00:39:02I'm with Haley

00:39:02I'm not Austin

00:39:03There's no side dish

00:39:04Don't bullshit me

00:39:07He sent a turkey

00:39:08I'm not bullshit, Lauren

00:39:09Haley, Lauren

00:39:10Your brother's

00:39:14Yeah

00:39:15John, stop waving at my friend

00:39:18Holy cow

00:39:18I'm watching you

00:39:22Shut the door

00:39:24It's cold outside

00:39:29I saw the two of you kissing

00:39:35Nice seeing you both

00:39:38What?

00:39:39What do you want?

00:39:40John, stop hitting Haley

00:39:42Okay, I think she might be into it, so I really don't want to stop

00:39:45She's not into it

00:39:46Okay, she might be

00:39:46She's not into it at all

00:39:47You know what? I'm picking up some things

00:39:48And if you think I don't know when I'm getting the eyes, then you're wrong

00:39:52There's no eyes, you're not her type

00:39:53This is one of those amazing, beautiful romances that's just starting a boss

00:39:57What are you talking about? She just showed up

00:39:59Yeah

00:39:59John, listen

00:40:00You have to relax

00:40:01I see, sense that you're worked up

00:40:03Listen to me

00:40:03Okay

00:40:04Haley is my girlfriend

00:40:07Oh, oh

00:40:09Okay

00:40:09Yeah

00:40:10But I mean, you made out with tons of my friends

00:40:12Oh my god, I mean, I was one of your friends

00:40:14And it wasn't Thanksgiving

00:40:14Let it go

00:40:15Let it go

00:40:16I owe you one

00:40:16Don't point your finger away

00:40:18I owe you one

00:40:18Put the finger away

00:40:19Okay, you know what?

00:40:20If you don't think I can make out with her, then I will take that as a challenge

00:40:25Don't

00:40:25Your room smells like farts

00:40:27Get out

00:40:28So maybe you want to do something about that

00:40:43Why don't you get over there so I can keep an eye on you

00:40:56You all right?

00:40:57Oh, yeah

00:40:57Yeah, they just, uh, they did a lot of cutting around the muscle

00:41:00So you're gonna blame cancer for your shitty golf game?

00:41:04You look all right, buddy

00:41:07Don't lie to me, I look like shit

00:41:08No, there's that

00:41:13Hey, what's the deal with Dad and the rosary?

00:41:17Well, he, uh

00:41:21He promised you'd do the rosary every day if you beat cancer

00:41:25So

00:41:26He's screwed

00:41:30You look good, though

00:41:32You eating healthy?

00:41:34From the guy who eats pie for breakfast

00:41:36And lunch

00:41:37You know, Georgie, I feel good

00:41:39Good?

00:41:40I feel like a teenager

00:41:41Like a really old, out-of-shape teenager

00:41:47Four

00:41:48On your house

00:41:56Okay

00:41:57I need a new thermometer

00:42:00Lauren, get me a new thermometer for Christmas

00:42:03That's all I want

00:42:04Great

00:42:04I'm hungry

00:42:05Hey, sweetie

00:42:06I-I have your baby clothes up in the attic

00:42:09Mom, there's no reason for baby clothes

00:42:10Oh, okay

00:42:11Is something burning in here?

00:42:13No, it's just

00:42:14It's the smoked turkey

00:42:15I mean, my turkey's fine

00:42:17It smells

00:42:18That's not a turkey

00:42:19Yeah, what's with the smoked turkey?

00:42:20It's a family tradition

00:42:21Alias up

00:42:22I am gonna be an awesome grandma

00:42:25Yo!

00:42:25Would a rational pregnant person do this?

00:42:29Yeah, boy

00:42:30Oh, boy

00:42:31Oh, wow

00:42:33No

00:42:33Nobody that did that

00:42:35Oh, my God

00:42:36No

00:42:36So awesome

00:42:38There's no baby

00:42:39You just killed it

00:42:40There's never a baby, Mom

00:42:41There's never a baby

00:42:44Get the turkey!

00:42:45Wait, wait, wait, wait

00:42:46Everybody out of the house

00:42:48Everybody out of the house

00:42:50Save the turkey and get out

00:42:53Come on

00:42:54Kelly and I have been dating for six months

00:42:56No one seems to give a shit about anything

00:42:59Move, move, move

00:43:00Get out

00:43:01The fire was not my fault

00:43:03Torch

00:43:03Where are Mom and Dad?

00:43:05Has anybody seen my father?

00:43:07Okay, we gotta go now

00:43:09We gotta go

00:43:11The house is okay

00:43:12The basement's got a lot of smoke damage

00:43:15What caused the fire?

00:43:16The joint sheath

00:43:20So, do you want to share?

00:43:23It's gonna be okay, Mom

00:43:24Why don't we go to the motel

00:43:25And have Thanksgiving dinner?

00:43:27Yeah, okay

00:43:29Okay

00:43:31Oh my God

00:43:32It's all that stuff

00:43:33I know

00:43:35Because

00:43:37His baseball bats

00:43:39I know

00:43:41It's gonna be okay

00:43:42His bird bats

00:43:44I mean

00:43:44It's gonna be okay

00:43:45It's gonna be okay

00:44:00Oh, happy Thanksgiving, Rose

00:44:01Oh, happy Thanksgiving to you, too

00:44:01And that is one hell of a way to smoke a turkey

00:44:03Ha!

00:44:04Ha!

00:44:06Ha!

00:44:06Dick

00:44:08Hey, where are you going?

00:44:10Brother's gonna give me a ride to the station

00:44:12I tried to tell him you heard me

00:44:14No, I know

00:44:15I'm sorry

00:44:16Look, I'm just really uncomfortable

00:44:17This is crazy, right?

00:44:19John?

00:44:20What?

00:44:20Haley's staying

00:44:20You're staying

00:44:21She said she wanted a ride

00:44:22I'll give her a ride

00:44:22What's your deal, anyway?

00:44:24You seem really, like, depressed or something?

00:44:26I can hold on to a bag, okay?

00:44:28Just hang on

00:44:30I need my friend's support

00:44:33Look, I get it that your family doesn't want to hear about your friends today

00:44:36But I think they need to know

00:44:38I need to know that my friend has my back

00:44:41And I need my friend to be open and honest about her feelings

00:44:44Friends are there even when it's inconvenient

00:44:45They're there when you need them the most

00:44:47Okay, she sounds like she's pretty hard to be friends with, right?

00:44:50Probably not even bother

00:44:51Give me Haley's bag

00:44:52Hey, hey, hey

00:44:53Give me some medicine

00:44:54Sibling rivalry

00:44:55Hey, guys, who am I right for you?

00:44:56Guys, we can, um, we can fit three in our backseat

00:45:01And we're gonna get sick

00:45:02Hey, we got the food in the driveway

00:45:04We could have, like, a picnic, man

00:45:06It's a beautiful day, you know

00:45:08Make him shut up

00:45:09Make him shut up before I will die

00:45:10I mean, there's no reason

00:45:12That we all gotta climb in the car

00:45:14And go to the motel

00:45:15Seriously

00:45:16Hey, Allison

00:45:17My parents said you're coming with us

00:45:19Cool

00:45:20I know

00:45:23We're just gonna

00:45:23We're gonna go to the motel

00:45:24And we're gonna have a perfect Thanksgiving dinner

00:45:28You, our saint

00:45:30We're putting up with all this

00:45:31Oh, Mrs. Anderson

00:45:33Oh, it's gonna be okay

00:45:35These are Ken's keys

00:45:37And this is Ken's car

00:45:38But it's just that they're not working

00:45:39Sweetie, find the keys that work for that car

00:45:42Or find a car that goes with those keys, okay?

00:45:45Johnny, put on your big boy pants

00:45:47Don't let the panic win

00:45:48So you're coming back to the motel with us, right?

00:45:51Oh, yes, you are

00:45:53Yeah

00:45:53Yes, you are

00:45:54Thank you so much for having me

00:45:56So we're just all gonna go to the motel?

00:45:58Yep

00:45:58All right, roommates

00:45:59John

00:46:00What?

00:46:01Leave Haley alone

00:46:02I'm not, not leaving her alone

00:46:04I've been talking to everybody

00:46:05I've been talking to everybody

00:46:06Guys, guys, guys

00:46:07Go away

00:46:07I, where else would I go?

00:46:09I can't go in the house

00:46:10Okay

00:46:10He's a moron

00:46:11Here we go

00:46:12He's a moron

00:46:14I'm sorry

00:46:15I'm sorry he's harassing you

00:46:17Work on your attitude

00:46:19Shut up

00:46:21We're all good

00:46:35What's with the smoked turkey?

00:46:36How many times are we gonna go through this today?

00:46:39Austin sent it

00:46:40What?

00:46:41He doesn't like your turkey?

00:46:43Does Austin not like my turkey?

00:46:44No, Mom

00:46:45It was just a gesture

00:46:46There's a peace offering

00:46:47He knew I wanted to kill him

00:46:49If you're gonna eat turkey today

00:46:51It's gonna be my turkey

00:46:52See, Lauren

00:46:53Your mom doesn't want you eating Austin's meat

00:46:55I thought you don't eat meat

00:46:56I don't

00:46:57Do you have any, uh, allergies

00:46:59I should know about Haley?

00:47:00Just bees

00:47:01Okay, I'm not gonna cook bees

00:47:03So that's fine

00:47:04She's gonna make us dinner

00:47:05Oh, man

00:47:20So, now, how long have you and Lauren been officially together?

00:47:24Yeah, no, it's not official

00:47:25Oh

00:47:26What the hell would you call it?

00:47:27Keeping your options open?

00:47:29Yep, nope

00:47:29That's not

00:47:30Not keeping our options open

00:47:31We're just, uh

00:47:32We're just roommates

00:47:34Mm-hmm

00:47:35Roommates

00:47:38No phone

00:47:39Disgusting casserole

00:47:40Hey

00:47:40It is not a casserole

00:47:42It is a spinach dip

00:47:43And it's the best goddamn spinach dip in this part of the country

00:47:49Salty

00:47:49It's buttery

00:47:50The edges get a little bit textury

00:47:53It's fantastic

00:47:54That, to me

00:47:55I mean

00:47:55I don't know

00:47:56It just seems perfect

00:47:57Well, and also, I

00:47:59If you pull it out a little early

00:48:01Sometimes we get a situation

00:48:04Oh, oh

00:48:07Oh, oh

00:48:17Oh, oh

00:48:19Oh, oh

00:48:40Are you kidding me?

00:48:45Hey, Mama.

00:48:46Yeah, sweetie.

00:48:47Let's try to enjoy what's left of the day.

00:48:50Papa would have wanted us to have a lovely Thanksgiving.

00:48:52It's very well put.

00:48:54Okay?

00:48:55All right?

00:48:56Wait a second.

00:48:57What?

00:48:58Probably I'll stay over there.

00:49:00Hey, John, maybe make yourself useful.

00:49:02Yeah, no problem.

00:49:03I was just saying we can figure out sleeping arrangements whenever it's good.

00:49:05We're obviously sharing.

00:49:06It's not an option.

00:49:08Listen, my mom is at boiling point.

00:49:10Let me just bring her back to zero, okay?

00:49:13I get it.

00:49:14I get it.

00:49:14It's all about preserving your mom's emotions.

00:49:18You know, maybe I should just get together with John.

00:49:21I'm glad to make her happy.

00:49:22You're being ridiculous.

00:49:23Your cousin is sexually harassing me.

00:49:25You need to deal with that.

00:49:27I can't deal with anything else today.

00:49:29Can you take this?

00:49:30Yeah.

00:49:31Okay, okay.

00:49:32I got it.

00:49:33I got it.

00:49:34What is going on here?

00:49:35This parking lot is for guests only.

00:49:37Is everything okay here?

00:49:37Is everything in here?

00:49:38Great.

00:49:40Guests only, please.

00:49:42I'm with Mike.

00:49:44Yeah, she's, uh, Emma.

00:49:47This is my guest.

00:49:48Yes.

00:49:49Hello, family.

00:49:50That was not supposed to be here with me today.

00:49:53We have this real accident at the house.

00:49:54Is everything okay here?

00:49:55Yeah.

00:49:56Is everything okay here?

00:49:57Is everything okay here, mom?

00:49:58She is.

00:49:59Everything is fine.

00:50:01Come on.

00:50:02We're going to go have some dinner and our bellies will be full.

00:50:05A surprise will be on our way.

00:50:07Let's, you know, let's make the most of it.

00:50:10The best of it.

00:50:11Right?

00:50:12The best of it.

00:50:13Hey, mom, can I grab a key for me and Haley to grab a key?

00:50:15Yes, go ahead.

00:50:16Okay.

00:50:16You good here?

00:50:17Yeah, I'm great here.

00:50:23I'm looking at you.

00:50:24I'm looking at you.

00:50:30You know, um, today was supposed to be a really important day.

00:50:34Yeah, how was I supposed to know that?

00:50:37Why exactly are you here?

00:50:38Because I like Lauren's family.

00:50:40What?

00:50:41You like Lauren.

00:50:42Okay.

00:50:43All right.

00:50:44All right.

00:50:44Look, you're frustrated because her family welcomed me with open arms.

00:50:49No, no.

00:50:50I'm frustrated because you've managed to hijack the entire day.

00:50:55They think you guys are a couple.

00:50:57Uh, that's not my fault.

00:50:58You and Lauren are never going to be a couple, okay?

00:51:02I hope you realize that.

00:51:06Okay.

00:51:09You guys have been dating for six months, right?

00:51:14We've been living together for three years.

00:51:18Guess who knows Lauren better.

00:51:23How the hell did Mike start that fire?

00:51:25Smoking pot.

00:51:26Where do you get the weed?

00:51:27Probably dealing again.

00:51:29I didn't realize he was selling ever.

00:51:31Hell yeah.

00:51:31Interesting.

00:51:33Interesting.

00:51:34Failed at it, of course.

00:51:36Probably failed at it again.

00:51:37Yeah.

00:51:38They're ripping off the flowers again.

00:51:40Who?

00:51:40I don't...

00:51:42Holy...

00:51:42Fuck!

00:51:44Johnny, stop pretending to help.

00:51:46You can actually help.

00:51:46Well, it's heavier than it looks, Mom.

00:51:48I'm putting the spinach dip right here.

00:51:50Okay, that's pretty easy.

00:51:51Give me a hand.

00:51:52I don't have anything else.

00:51:53I don't want to...

00:51:54I don't want to finish it.

00:51:56I don't want to finish it.

00:51:59I don't want to finish it, right?

00:52:10Relax if you want, or...

00:52:12Oh.

00:52:21George?

00:52:22Hey!

00:52:22Watch the damn turkey video.

00:52:24Okay.

00:52:24I will watch the video.

00:52:26Now.

00:52:26Absolutely.

00:52:27Why wouldn't I?

00:52:29Close!

00:52:30Somebody's calling.

00:52:31Do you mind closing the door, honey?

00:52:41Yeah.

00:52:42Uh-huh.

00:52:45Your brother and his friend.

00:52:47I know, I know.

00:52:48What the hell is going on here?

00:52:49Let me call the police.

00:52:50I got this.

00:52:52I can't call the cops on Mikey.

00:52:54That's why you're going to let me call the cops on him.

00:52:57Okay?

00:52:58Okay.

00:52:59You can do it!

00:53:02Just come inside and just act on...

00:53:05I am not going inside.

00:53:06Are you out of your mind?

00:53:07Please come inside.

00:53:08Please come inside.

00:53:10Do you want to get this done?

00:53:11Oh, my...

00:53:12You want to get this done?

00:53:13Yes.

00:53:13Want to be a professional?

00:53:14Let's go inside.

00:53:14Do you want to be professional?

00:53:15I want to be...

00:53:16I am a professional.

00:53:16Do you want to be professional?

00:53:17Oh, my God!

00:53:17You are the absolute worst.

00:53:18I've been a professional for a while.

00:53:20Oh, yo, yo, you're so professional.

00:53:22We can stay in here tonight.

00:53:24Shouldn't we be sleeping in separate beds?

00:53:28Bye.

00:53:30Lauren.

00:53:31Okay, I think I'll call Mike's dating a gay lady.

00:53:35Yeah, I know a lesbian when I see one.

00:53:37Hi, Ailey.

00:53:38Hey.

00:53:38What are you doing?

00:53:39What are you guys doing?

00:53:39Okay, bye.

00:53:40Okay, bye.

00:53:43Impeccable gaydar, that one.

00:53:45Spot on.

00:53:45I'm glad there's so many love connections happening.

00:53:48And my whole family will know about this one.

00:53:51Are you laughing about this someday?

00:53:54Sure.

00:53:56It's nice to have a moment away from my family.

00:54:01I was really excited to meet them today.

00:54:04I know.

00:54:07They're gonna love you.

00:54:08I'm sorry.

00:54:10I'm sorry.

00:54:10I didn't go as far.

00:54:15I just...

00:54:17It doesn't feel good enough to be worth talking about.

00:54:21Of course you're worth talking about.

00:54:27I adore you.

00:54:41Hey, dad.

00:54:43I really need to talk to you.

00:54:45Yeah, you and Austin are not sharing a room.

00:54:47That's not happening.

00:54:48I don't want to share a room with Austin.

00:54:51It's the first Thanksgiving without Papa.

00:54:52Uh-huh.

00:54:53It's really important that we make this a nice dinner for Mom.

00:54:57There's something I have to talk to you both about.

00:54:59Oh, yeah?

00:55:00What's up?

00:55:02Hayley and I...

00:55:03I mean, you're right about your mom.

00:55:04She's not having it.

00:55:06Easy go of it.

00:55:08Pop-pop passing and...

00:55:11This place.

00:55:13Mike.

00:55:15She's sad.

00:55:17She misses you.

00:55:19You guys were so close, you know?

00:55:22We're still close, dad.

00:55:24You want him to tell me something?

00:55:28Let's just have a really nice Thanksgiving dinner.

00:55:31Yeah, yeah, yeah.

00:55:32It starts with carving, apparently.

00:55:34I mean, just watch the video.

00:55:35Is it just YouTube carving?

00:55:37YouTube comma carving?

00:55:39Turkey video carving in the internet will lead you right there.

00:55:44Right there.

00:55:45This was supposed to be an easy merchandise move.

00:55:48And now you're asking me to pretend to be your girlfriend.

00:55:50Just relax, Emma.

00:55:52Everybody's going to be eating.

00:55:53You can do your business.

00:55:55Yeah, I hope I can do my business, okay?

00:55:57Then what are you supposed to be here, okay?

00:55:59You don't mess with the cartel.

00:56:00Okay.

00:56:01And that's another thing about the cartel.

00:56:03I should be part of this cartel.

00:56:06What are you guys doing out here?

00:56:08Not much.

00:56:09Nature.

00:56:10Question.

00:56:12You carrying?

00:56:13What?

00:56:14You know.

00:56:15Hey.

00:56:17Oh, man.

00:56:18I don't even know what you're talking about.

00:56:20Come on, Mike.

00:56:22Yes.

00:56:23Hi.

00:56:23He is selling.

00:56:25Dude, this is my sister's husband's brother.

00:56:29I don't care who it is.

00:56:30We have merchandise to move.

00:56:33How much are you looking for?

00:56:36Joint.

00:56:38Now you're just wasting our time.

00:56:40Oh, mom's stuffing is so good.

00:56:42Thank you, sweetie.

00:56:43So, uh, Hayley, how strict a vegetarian would you say that you are?

00:56:47Hey, John.

00:56:48We're exclusively vegetarian.

00:56:49I mean, can she handle, like, a little sausage?

00:56:52Come on.

00:56:54What the hell's the matter with you?

00:56:55I just want her to taste mom's stuffing.

00:56:57So she puts little sausages in it.

00:56:58I don't even know whether to accept that is what that is, but it's the grimmest shirt I ever saw

00:57:03in my life that you're wearing.

00:57:05Grandpa, I couldn't agree more.

00:57:06That's the ugliest sweater I've ever seen.

00:57:07Well, truthfully, I don't love it either, but mom picked it out, and she, um, is great.

00:57:14So, Hayley, I'm a good man with a good soul.

00:57:18There's a good chance I'm going to murder you this Thanksgiving, John.

00:57:21Yeah, well, I took out a hell of a life insurance policy on myself, so you can make me a

00:57:26very rich man.

00:57:33What are you doing?

00:57:35Nothing.

00:57:37Mike sold me some weed.

00:57:39Oh, my God.

00:57:39We have a teenage daughter in there, and you're out here doing drugs?

00:57:43Barely.

00:57:43Come on.

00:57:44Look, there's a shit ton of weed.

00:57:46Honey, they don't sell it like they used to.

00:57:48And you plan on smoking all of that?

00:57:50I don't know.

00:57:51My girlfriend scared the shit out of me.

00:57:56How are you feeling?

00:57:58Better.

00:58:00Well, get back inside.

00:58:03Before you get us all arrested.

00:58:08What the hell?

00:58:11Can you help with the chair?

00:58:13I don't know.

00:58:14I got it.

00:58:15Why didn't they call that guy?

00:58:16What's your story?

00:58:17I thought that's what this meant.

00:58:19Uh, complicated.

00:58:20Yeah, I had this rubric skewed when I was little.

00:58:22I was able to get all the blues.

00:58:24I can't.

00:58:25I'm stopping.

00:58:25Hey, what you got there, Josephine?

00:58:28Digestive enzymes.

00:58:29Shut up.

00:58:29Hmm.

00:58:30Thanks.

00:58:31A lot of food to digest today.

00:58:34As well as new information.

00:58:37Okay.

00:58:37What kind of information?

00:58:40Uh-oh, look what I found.

00:58:42What?

00:58:42Look what I found.

00:58:43Oh!

00:58:44It's a spinach dip.

00:58:45Somebody has to talk into it.

00:58:46There is a guy.

00:58:47Oh, it's something.

00:58:48Oh, hi.

00:58:49Hmm.

00:58:51Perfect.

00:58:52Happy Thanksgiving.

00:58:55Can you move, Johnny?

00:58:56Don't worry about dropping it.

00:58:57It's dead.

00:58:58There we go.

00:59:00All we need to do is carve it.

00:59:03It just needs to be carved.

00:59:04And then we're good.

00:59:06We're all good.

00:59:06Rose, that turkey looks like ass.

00:59:08Old ass.

00:59:09You look like old ass.

00:59:11Mikey, would you please come into the kitchen, please?

00:59:14Yeah, I'll stay here.

00:59:15I think I'd rather you...

00:59:16Oh!

00:59:17Excuse me.

00:59:18What'd you do?

00:59:20Oh!

00:59:20Ow!

00:59:20You tell me what's going on.

00:59:21Great, you wrinkle my good shirt!

00:59:22You tell me what's going on.

00:59:23Or I am calling the cops.

00:59:25I'm your friend.

00:59:25She's my girlfriend, and I love her.

00:59:27You love her?

00:59:28Yeah.

00:59:30What's going on?

00:59:31I'm...

00:59:32Nothing's going on.

00:59:34Nothing.

00:59:35Ow!

00:59:36Broke my rib or my ass or something.

00:59:39I think I like the other question.

00:59:40Anyway, Haley, I thought I could make you a plate.

00:59:42I know you don't normally eat a lot of meat.

00:59:44What?

00:59:44I'm an immovable law.

00:59:45Going to eat the turkey.

00:59:47Okay, you're making this very awkward.

00:59:49Oh, my God.

00:59:50Today might be the day I try something new.

00:59:52See?

00:59:53She might want, you know, a breast or a thigh or...

00:59:56She does not want any turkey.

00:59:58No, he's right, Lauren.

00:59:59I'd usually go for a big hunk of breast,

01:00:01but maybe today I'd like a juicy drumstick.

01:00:04It sucks.

01:00:05Okay, so you're going to have to move while I make you're a plate

01:00:07because it's feeling very sexual,

01:00:08and you need to do this for me

01:00:10because you're the best finger dip maker in the world.

01:00:13Button push.

01:00:14Jesus Christ.

01:00:15Wait.

01:00:15What are we doing here?

01:00:16I'm going to go cool off.

01:00:17I'm going to do my tens where I count to ten in the other room.

01:00:19Yes.

01:00:19And you need to grow up while I'm gone, okay?

01:00:22Because I can't deal with your childish behavior.

01:00:24I'm sorry about her.

01:00:25It's okay, John.

01:00:26Thank you for being so understanding.

01:00:28I like it.

01:00:29I know, but...

01:00:30I love you, and I love this band.

01:00:32Don't worry.

01:00:33Which do you love more?

01:00:34Happy Thanksgiving.

01:00:35No.

01:00:37Are you drinking?

01:00:43Mom, it's a holiday.

01:00:45No!

01:00:46The turkey!

01:00:48Dad, seriously?

01:00:51Not happening.

01:00:52Get an edge off.

01:00:53No.

01:00:54The edge off of what?

01:00:56Between the breast and the drumstick,

01:00:59cut through the skin,

01:01:00gently but firmly pull the drumstick and thigh away from the breast.

01:01:04Uh, okay.

01:01:07Why is she carving my turkey?

01:01:10Put, put, put the skin down.

01:01:12Put the skin back there.

01:01:14I'll put the skin down.

01:01:15I got it.

01:01:16Why does the turkey need a blanket?

01:01:17It's dead.

01:01:18It's more than a blanket.

01:01:19It's tasty, tasty.

01:01:20Terrible for cholesterol.

01:01:21The skin is the best part, Joe.

01:01:23Austin's turkey also, if we need it.

01:01:25Are you kidding me?

01:01:26No, Dad.

01:01:27What's happening?

01:01:28Are you kidding me?

01:01:28All right.

01:01:29Is everybody happy?

01:01:30I carved the turkey.

01:01:32Okay.

01:01:32The turkey that I, that I have been cooking all day.

01:01:35That smells so necessary.

01:01:36There we go.

01:01:37No offense, Austin.

01:01:39No, none, none taken.

01:01:40The turkey looks perfect.

01:01:42Sit down.

01:01:42I'm gonna cut the turkey now.

01:01:43Wait a second.

01:01:44We forgot Grace.

01:01:45Oh, boy.

01:01:46Okay.

01:01:47Ow.

01:01:47Oh, yeah, Grace.

01:01:48How'd you?

01:01:49You wanna do it?

01:01:50Oh.

01:01:51Uh, um, I can get this.

01:01:53Austin should lead Grace.

01:01:55Yeah.

01:01:55No.

01:01:56I got it.

01:01:57I got it.

01:01:58Somebody say Grace.

01:01:59That's more fighting over Grace than any Grace I ever knew.

01:02:02Okay.

01:02:03Uh, well, first of all, thank you for cooking this beautiful dinner.

01:02:07You're welcome.

01:02:09Thanksgiving's all about thanks and truth.

01:02:14Amen.

01:02:14And forgiveness.

01:02:16Giving.

01:02:17And not groping your sister's friend, John.

01:02:19But mostly, it's about coming home and coming out about things.

01:02:25Oh, holy shit.

01:02:27What?

01:02:28You all right?

01:02:29Are you okay?

01:02:31Come on, you can do it.

01:02:34Okay.

01:02:36Uh, uh, Mom?

01:02:41Is there something you wanna say, sweetie?

01:02:45Lauren.

01:02:46Uh, we, we need wine.

01:02:49Do you want wine?

01:02:50Do you want more wine?

01:02:50I, uh, we're out of wine.

01:02:53This table needs more wine.

01:02:54Who wants, who wants wine?

01:02:55I need some wine.

01:02:56Yeah, sure, more wine.

01:02:56I'm just gonna, I'm just gonna get a bottle.

01:02:58I'm just gonna get some wine.

01:02:59And I'll be right back.

01:03:00Grandma wants red.

01:03:04Okay.

01:03:05What a lunatic.

01:03:06We keep holding hands?

01:03:08Nah, eat up.

01:03:09There's no reason to wait now.

01:03:10Excuse me.

01:03:11The worst.

01:03:12Great.

01:03:13I mean, that was the worst.

01:03:15Was that not terrible?

01:03:16I didn't get my hair.

01:03:18Well, I'm covering the turkey now.

01:03:19I'm gonna have more, so.

01:03:23Lauren.

01:03:26Okay, so.

01:03:30You and Haley, you're dating, aren't you?

01:03:33Oh, my God.

01:03:34Thank God.

01:03:35Yes, yes.

01:03:36Please go tell everyone.

01:03:37Uh, yeah, no.

01:03:39Your mother would freak out if she wasn't the first person to know.

01:03:41Yeah, yeah.

01:03:42Oh, my God.

01:03:43Maggie, thank you so much for being cool enough to put two and two together.

01:03:47Okay, um, stay here.

01:03:48I'm gonna go get Jessica.

01:03:49So you can tell her.

01:03:50Oh, wait, wait, wait.

01:03:50I have to tell my mom before I start telling everyone else.

01:03:53Oh, yeah, no.

01:03:53I mean about the part about me being cool.

01:03:55Oh.

01:03:56I promise I will tell her how cool you are after.

01:03:59Okay, good.

01:04:00And, um, what exactly is scissoring?

01:04:03Because I can touch my toes, but I can't do the splits.

01:04:07Oh, um, maybe we revisit this after dessert?

01:04:11I gotta do the splits, don't I?

01:04:14Oh, God damn it.

01:04:15Nice.

01:04:22Oh, hey, sorry.

01:04:23I was just washing my hands.

01:04:26She really locked the door.

01:04:28Unless you're looking for some company.

01:04:32Yeah, no, not looking for any company.

01:04:34No company needed.

01:04:35I was just using the bathroom.

01:04:38What are you doing?

01:04:39Uh, looking for wine?

01:04:40You're hiding.

01:04:40No, I'm not.

01:04:43Oh, you don't.

01:04:44Do you want to have sex right now?

01:04:45What?

01:04:46It's what you like, right?

01:04:47It makes you hot, keeping it a secret.

01:04:49I don't like this version of you.

01:04:50I don't like this version of you.

01:04:53You are just so concerned about everyone else's feelings.

01:04:57What about mine?

01:04:58Hmm?

01:05:00What about my feelings?

01:05:09You're really young, okay?

01:05:11And these are your formative years, and you're going to be a crazy heartbreaker, but I am

01:05:14way too old for you.

01:05:15Can you put your shirt back on?

01:05:17This turkey tastes so good.

01:05:18No, no, no.

01:05:20It tastes like so good.

01:05:21Uh, Mom?

01:05:21Whoa, what took so long?

01:05:23Dipping into the side dish while we're all sitting here waiting for the main course.

01:05:27No, Mom, I wanted to tell you, uh...

01:05:30Lauren, you didn't even remember the wine.

01:05:32That was the whole point.

01:05:33Haley, you can have mine, I guess.

01:05:35John, let me talk for two seconds.

01:05:36Okay, sure.

01:05:37Mom, thank you so much for putting all this food together.

01:05:39Um, I cannot be more grateful.

01:05:42I could not be more grateful to be able to spend Thanksgiving with all of you and be able

01:05:47to talk to you all so openly about, like, life and gather and just...

01:05:54And I have an announcement to make, everyone.

01:05:57Don't...

01:05:57Don't do this like this.

01:05:59This is not what...

01:06:02Whoa.

01:06:03I'm going here.

01:06:06It's just French living.

01:06:07Let's see what happens.

01:06:08What?

01:06:10No, it's not what it...

01:06:11It's not what it looks like.

01:06:12No, no, she kissed me!

01:06:16She kissed me!

01:06:18I kissed him all the George.

01:06:20You son of a bitch.

01:06:22My baby!

01:06:24Grounded.

01:06:25Kiss me!

01:06:26I thought it wasn't a dog!

01:06:27No, no!

01:06:29I didn't want to do!

01:06:31Never know!

01:06:32Stop!

01:06:33It's a nut!

01:06:33Easy!

01:06:34You never know!

01:06:35Stop!

01:06:35No!

01:06:36No!

01:06:37It's a spinos!

01:06:38It's a hand's right for dinner.

01:06:40No, no, no, no!

01:06:41God, God, God, God, God!

01:06:43That was my spinach dip.

01:06:47Yeah.

01:06:48Mom, Mom!

01:06:49Ugh!

01:06:50What are you doing?

01:06:51Hailey and I are in a relationship.

01:06:54Wait, what?

01:06:59Oh.

01:07:01Knew it.

01:07:02She's pretty, the little girl.

01:07:05You're a lesbian.

01:07:08A lesbian, Hare Krishna.

01:07:12What about Austin?

01:07:13There is no me in Austin.

01:07:16Austin said you guys had sex.

01:07:20You slept with Austin?

01:07:22Sorry to interrupt, but there are two men unloading what seems to be a whole lot of weed from that

01:07:29van.

01:07:35I'm sorry.

01:07:39Hey!

01:07:40Hey, you guys!

01:07:42What are you doing with my brother's girlfriend's truck?

01:07:45Girlfriend?

01:07:47Emma, I'm so happy for you.

01:07:49You're not dating.

01:07:50Where the hell are you?

01:07:51We're the cartel.

01:07:52Wait, this is the cartel?

01:07:53I'm Bubba.

01:07:54Cartel.

01:07:55Chino.

01:07:55Okay, I'm calling the cops.

01:07:57No, no, no, no, no.

01:07:57We can't call the cops because we're accomplices.

01:07:59Oh, yeah.

01:08:00Hey, this is your weed.

01:08:01My parents do drugs.

01:08:02You do drugs.

01:08:03Wait, wait, wait.

01:08:04Wait.

01:08:04All right, all right.

01:08:05I'm going to pull a sword on me.

01:08:06Your brother owes us money.

01:08:08Take my brother.

01:08:09You can't let him take me.

01:08:10No, you are not joining our cartel.

01:08:11You are not joining me.

01:08:12You are fired.

01:08:13You can't fire me.

01:08:14Okay, you are cut off.

01:08:15Oh, come on.

01:08:16I'll kill him.

01:08:17Seriously?

01:08:17Absolutely not.

01:08:17You're going to make this go away.

01:08:19I just don't even know.

01:08:19You're going to make it go away, my friend.

01:08:21I'm trying to come out of the goddamn closet here, people.

01:08:26Jesus.

01:08:27What is happening?

01:08:29Haley!

01:08:29Get out of here!

01:08:31Get out of here!

01:08:35Get out of here!

01:08:37Ah!

01:08:38That was my turkey.

01:08:40It wasn't it.

01:08:41All right.

01:08:42All right.

01:08:43What does this mean?

01:08:44There's no dessert?

01:08:47Haley?

01:08:49Haley, open the door, please.

01:08:50I'm leaving.

01:08:51I don't want to talk to you.

01:08:52Haley, please open the door.

01:08:55Haley, come on.

01:08:56Open the door.

01:08:56Go away, Lauren.

01:09:03Why would you tell my dad we slept together?

01:09:05I didn't know.

01:09:06You know, this is the worst day of my life.

01:09:07Why didn't you tell your family about Haley?

01:09:09I did.

01:09:09I've been trying.

01:09:09Before today, before she came, before I came.

01:09:12I didn't know you were coming, Austin.

01:09:13You know what I'm talking about.

01:09:16I wanted to make sure it was serious.

01:09:18You wanted to make sure it was serious?

01:09:19I have watched you dive headfirst into over a hundred different phases over the last three years.

01:09:23You remember when you were into aerobic pole dancing?

01:09:26It's kind of that same vein.

01:09:27You know what I mean?

01:09:28Don't compare Haley to a fitness class, Austin.

01:09:30That is not fair.

01:09:31I'm sorry.

01:09:32It's not fair.

01:09:32I'm sorry.

01:09:34I'm sorry.

01:09:34I don't know what to do.

01:09:35I don't know what to do here.

01:09:37I mean, it wasn't so bad being in a relationship for a day, right?

01:09:41I just need to clear my head.

01:09:43You're avoiding my question.

01:09:45What question?

01:09:46It wasn't so bad being in a relationship for a day.

01:09:48I mean, we lived together for three years.

01:09:50It always felt like we were in a relationship.

01:09:53Austin, what are you doing?

01:09:55What are you doing?

01:09:56You know me better than anyone.

01:09:58And I know you better than anyone.

01:10:02No.

01:10:07Stop.

01:10:09Haley.

01:10:09Haley, please stop.

01:10:12Haley, Haley, Haley, Haley, Haley.

01:10:14Haley.

01:10:16You had sex with Austin.

01:10:17It was way before you and me.

01:10:20You should have told me.

01:10:22How good would that have done?

01:10:24You know, I always said your friendship was...

01:10:27You just made me feel like I was crazy.

01:10:30I didn't want you to worry about anything happening.

01:10:32You just kissed him.

01:10:33He kissed me.

01:10:34You let it happen.

01:10:36You know, I feel like such an asshole.

01:10:40Here I am to meet your parents,

01:10:42and you two are just parading around like a couple with a secret.

01:10:46It's not like that.

01:10:47I love you.

01:10:48I love you.

01:10:51It's a really shitty time to say it for the first time.

01:10:56I can't trust you.

01:10:59But I do love...

01:11:01I love you.

01:11:02You're the one I love.

01:11:03It's not him.

01:11:04Come on.

01:11:04This entire day,

01:11:08my family wouldn't listen to me.

01:11:10They are not the problem.

01:11:13You are the problem.

01:11:15I...

01:11:16You...

01:11:16Just...

01:11:17Just stop.

01:11:18Just stop.

01:11:19Just stop.

01:11:20You have no idea what you want.

01:11:22I don't want to be gay, Haley.

01:11:27Nobody wants this.

01:11:29Nobody wants...

01:11:30I'm sorry.

01:11:34I'm sorry.

01:11:39Finally, I have some honesty.

01:11:46I just...

01:11:47I can't do this anymore.

01:11:59Where's Haley going?

01:12:01She's leaving because of you.

01:12:02I hope you're happy.

01:12:03Of course I'm not happy.

01:12:06Why didn't you just tell us?

01:12:08Mom, you don't listen to me!

01:12:10You need to be more clear.

01:12:12I had no idea.

01:12:14I knew you were not going to accept this.

01:12:16I didn't know I had to.

01:12:18Just leave me alone.

01:12:18I didn't know.

01:12:19Leave me alone.

01:12:20Just leave me alone.

01:12:22Let her go.

01:12:23Leave her alone.

01:12:27She's so angry with us.

01:12:28She's like...

01:12:29Not at us.

01:12:30Completely...

01:12:30Not at us.

01:12:31Oh, my God.

01:12:32She's angry.

01:12:33Yes.

01:12:33She's hurt.

01:12:35Is she going to be okay?

01:12:37She is going to be okay.

01:12:38It's just going to take a little while.

01:12:40Women are nicer than men.

01:12:43Women?

01:12:44That...

01:12:45That's all you got for me.

01:12:46Women are nicer than men.

01:12:48She follows her heart.

01:12:50She's always followed her heart.

01:12:52That's all she's doing now.

01:12:54Oh, boy.

01:12:55Oh, boy.

01:12:57Are we bad parents?

01:12:59Where?

01:13:03We're not terrible.

01:13:04We're not great.

01:13:05We're...

01:13:06Well...

01:13:07Fair.

01:13:12Trust me.

01:13:14Everything's going to be okay.

01:13:17I promise.

01:13:34Pack yourself a good, fresh deal.

01:13:38Pack yourself a favorite block.

01:13:41Take a withdrawal slip.

01:13:44Take all of your savings out.

01:13:49Cause if we don't leave this town.

01:13:52We might never make it out.

01:13:55I was not born and drowned.

01:14:00Baby, come on.

01:14:06Forget what Father Brennan said.

01:14:10You were not born and sick.

01:14:13Leave a note on your bed.

01:14:17Let your mother know you're safe.

01:14:21And by the time she wakes.

01:14:24We'll have driven through the state.

01:14:26We'll have driven through the night.

01:14:33Baby, come on.

01:14:47Coffee.

01:14:57How you feeling?

01:15:01I know this is not the life you imagined for me.

01:15:05Right.

01:15:08I don't think this is the life you imagined for yourself.

01:15:13I'm sorry that I didn't know him.

01:15:19It's okay.

01:15:24Ooh.

01:15:26I just thought Mike was the only one dating a lesbian.

01:15:33Mom, who knew you were funny?

01:15:35I know.

01:15:35I'm very...

01:15:37I'm very funny.

01:15:41You're okay with it?

01:15:43Oh my God.

01:15:44Yes.

01:15:45Of course I'm okay with it.

01:15:46I mean, I need to sort of adjust my idea.

01:15:54Life never goes the way you expected.

01:15:56That's all.

01:15:59But you're...

01:16:01But you're...

01:16:02Yeah.

01:16:02You're...

01:16:03You're good.

01:16:10Is it okay if I ask you a question?

01:16:13What's the question?

01:16:14Is this your first time with a girl?

01:16:23I slept with...

01:16:25I slept with...

01:16:26Elizabeth?

01:16:28Which Elizabeth?

01:16:29A bunch more.

01:16:30Which Elizabeth?

01:16:31College roommate, college roommate.

01:16:32Oh my God.

01:16:33She's a little mouse.

01:16:36So much.

01:16:37So much.

01:16:38Wow.

01:16:38She had hidden depths.

01:16:41Can I ask you one more question?

01:16:43Oh God, what?

01:16:44Did you always know that you were gay?

01:16:50I just thought I was really open.

01:16:53Oh good.

01:16:53Someone's at the door.

01:16:57Hey, Betty.

01:16:58Hey, Betty.

01:16:59How are you, honey?

01:17:00Hi.

01:17:00Ronnie said you were here.

01:17:02Yes.

01:17:03Here.

01:17:04My daughter brought me the money.

01:17:06Well, I'm very happy to hear that.

01:17:09Okay, you have a good morning.

01:17:13Thank you for that.

01:17:15Do you want to get some fresh hair?

01:17:17I would love to.

01:17:22You know, um, my roommate in college was a lesbian.

01:17:26Did I ever tell you that?

01:17:27No.

01:17:28Mm-hmm.

01:17:30She told me I wasn't her type.

01:17:33I was so insulted.

01:17:36I don't even know what to do with that information.

01:17:40So, um, do you, do you, um, like having sex with men?

01:17:47I'm just trying to understand.

01:17:49Don't get mad.

01:17:50No, no, no, Matt.

01:17:51Um, no, I just prefer women.

01:17:55It just clicks with women.

01:17:58It never clicked that way with men.

01:18:01Why didn't you tell me?

01:18:05I think it was easier

01:18:08thinking.

01:18:11I think I was so worried that

01:18:15you guys wouldn't be okay with it.

01:18:18I never stopped to think of how I was.

01:18:21I'm not so nervous.

01:18:30Oh, it's okay.

01:18:31Your parent is always as happy as they are.

01:18:33What a happiest child.

01:18:35I'm happy.

01:18:36I'm happy.

01:18:37I'm happy.

01:18:39I'm just figuring stuff out.

01:18:45Thank you, Mom.

01:18:47You're so welcome.

01:18:50Hayley doesn't hate you.

01:18:52Hayley hates me.

01:18:53She does not hate you.

01:18:54She does not hate you.

01:18:55She's her.

01:18:55And we like her, just so you know.

01:18:58But you're the one that has to be okay with it.

01:19:01You're the one that has to be okay with us.

01:19:08I would do anything in the whole world for you.

01:19:10You know that, right?

01:19:12Good.

01:19:16This coffee is disgusting.

01:19:18I know.

01:19:18It's so gross.

01:19:20It's Ronnie's special.

01:19:21It's not special.

01:19:23It's so bad.

01:19:23That's right.

01:19:25It's so bad.

01:19:33Okay.

01:19:45You didn't say goodbye this morning but yeah I thought I'd give you some more time with your

01:19:50parents grandma took all of your smoked turkey leftovers I'm glad she liked it I promised her

01:19:57that I was gonna send her another one next year I'm gonna move out

01:20:08I'm sorry about yesterday Austin the entire day was my fault I'm talking about the kiss

01:20:15I know it's okay I mean I guess I didn't realize how serious you and Hayley were

01:20:29yeah I love her I don't I should have told her sooner

01:20:35yeah well you should have told everyone

01:20:39I should have told everyone I should have told everyone so much sooner

01:20:45you're my best friend Austin

01:20:49if it was gonna be a guy it'd have been you

01:21:00I was clean

01:21:02I was young and an actress

01:21:06when you knelt by my mattress and asked for my hand

01:21:31I was late for this late for that late for the love of my life and when I die wrong

01:21:40when I die wrong

01:21:41I'll be on time

01:21:44and while the church discouraged any lust would burn within me

01:21:58yes my flesh it was my currency but I held true

01:22:05but I was late for that late for that late for the love of my life and when I die

01:22:13wrong

01:22:13when I die wrong when I die I'll be on time

01:22:20I was clean with my truck I was taller than the raptor

01:22:26but I saw in the past love going away

01:22:32and now I know in white shoes

01:22:35it leads me back to my kiss

01:22:37so often in this cluster we come up against this fear

01:22:40and in love too it's fear that often gets in the way of its magic

01:22:44I'm sorry

01:22:44oh wait class started an hour ago

01:22:46I'm sorry to you too

01:22:50I need to talk to you

01:22:51what are you doing here?

01:22:53you deserve flowers

01:22:57I want to be the one that gives you flowers

01:23:02I was wrong

01:23:03I'm sorry

01:23:04this is all new and scary

01:23:06and it's wonderful and exciting

01:23:08but it's scary

01:23:10and that thing with Austin I'm so sorry

01:23:12I should have told you

01:23:13but I love you

01:23:14I'm in love with you

01:23:17this is not how I saw my life

01:23:19but it's so much better than anything I could have imagined

01:23:24and I want to be with you

01:23:26you'll take me back

01:23:28mom

01:23:32is that a yes?

01:23:34yes

01:23:35I have something I'm going to ask you

01:23:38oh no I just feel really bad on the spot

01:23:44will you move in with me?

01:23:47yes

01:23:48yes?

01:23:49of course

01:23:59I love you

01:24:01I love you too

01:24:03hey

01:24:04I'm the best version of myself with you

01:24:11when are you planning to tell your parents we're moving in?

01:24:14oh

01:24:14I was thinking Christmas

01:24:22yes

01:24:24so

01:24:28yes

01:24:30In the rain, in the crashing waves

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