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Congratulations. You've been hired as the night janitor at St. Aurelius Hospital, Ward C. Pay: $19 an hour. Four rules: mop from Room 301 to Room 309 but skip Room 307. Never take the wheelchair patient to the elevator. At 3:33 AM, keep mopping and never look up. If there's an extra mop bucket on your cart at clock-out, leave it. The last janitor looked up during the flicker. Welcome to the night shift. Follow the rules.

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