00:00Why didn't you stop? I could get pregnant.
00:05I'll take responsibility.
00:06I'd loved Bryce Crawford since I was a kid.
00:09The day he confessed to the pretty transfer student.
00:11Everyone thought I would lose it.
00:13Come crashing in, crying, begging him to stop.
00:15But I never showed.
00:16Until six months later, Bryce's birthday.
00:18His untouchable roommate, the heir Cassian Sterling,
00:21was caught making out with a hot girl in the stairwell.
00:24Everyone stared, stunned,
00:25because they found that gorgeous girl was me.
00:27The fatty they used to called Big Clara.
00:30Bryce was going to confess to the pretty transfer student.
00:32He'd given everyone a heads up,
00:34made them all keep it from me,
00:35but he didn't know.
00:36Someone with a big mouth had already told me.
00:38Everyone knew I was crazy about Bryce Crawford.
00:40Marrying him has always been my dream.
00:42This time, Bryce had fallen hard for the new girl.
00:44Seriously.
00:45So they thought I'd probably cry, scream, throw a fit.
00:48That kind of messy, pathetic drama everyone wants to watch.
00:51They were all waiting for me to lose it.
00:53Storm in to blow the whole thing up.
00:54Too bad.
00:55Right up until Bryce successfully finished his confession,
00:57I still hadn't shown.
00:58The bustling crowd started losing interest.
01:01Even Bryce's face didn't have much joy in it.
01:03Not a single call.
01:04Not a single text.
01:05Drinks on me tonight.
01:06Everyone's invited.
01:07The students cheered.
01:08Now I stepped out.
01:09The second he saw my swollen face,
01:10the corner of his mouth twitched in disgust.
01:12I ignored the crowd waiting for a show,
01:14walked straight up to Bryce.
01:15It's Clara.
01:16Big Clara's here.
01:17Told you.
01:17No way Clara could stay away.
01:19Clara, you can't force my feelings.
01:21This you, not my type.
01:22Yeah, absolutely no.
01:23But we've known each other our whole lives.
01:25I don't want to say anything ugly and ruin what we had.
01:27From now on, I'll still treat you like my little sister.
01:30If you need anything, you can still come to me.
01:32Everyone's watching.
01:33Don't make a scene.
01:34Just go home.
01:35Bryce.
01:36Clara, be good.
01:41I just came to give this back.
01:43Clara, what are you trying to pull now?
01:45Look at your wrist.
01:46You can barely even fit into that thing anymore.
01:48Take the bracelet back.
01:49I won't come around anymore.
01:50This means nothing to me.
01:51If you don't want it, throw it out.
01:52I didn't look at him again.
01:53Turned and walked away.
01:54All the gifts I gave you before,
01:56just throw them out too.
01:57Come on.
01:57Clara's just saving her pride.
01:59She's putting on a front.
01:59Bryce stood there until I was completely gone from sight.
02:01She's gotten so fat.
02:03Who else would even want to be friends with her besides you?
02:05Bryce, you'll see.
02:06Before the night's over, she'll regret it.
02:09Bet you 20 bucks.
02:10As soon as we leave, she'll be back here crying,
02:13digging through that trash can.
02:15Let her.
02:16If it weren't for our families,
02:17I wouldn't waste five minutes on her.
02:19All right, all right.
02:20Don't let her ruin tonight.
02:21We're supposed to be celebrating.
02:22Bryce glanced at his gorgeous new girlfriend.
02:24He tossed my annoying face out of his head.
02:26He thought I would act as if nothing had happened tomorrow,
02:28waiting for him at his dorm building,
02:30pestering him to go to class together.
02:31He'd seen this play out too many times over the years.
02:34By the time I got to the bridge,
02:35the rain was coming down hard.
02:37I stood there, under my umbrella,
02:39thinking about my last life.
02:41After I found out I was adopted,
02:43and my parents never loved me,
02:45depression and the medication left me bloated and heavy.
02:47I become the school's biggest joke.
02:49A fat, ugly, big Clara.
02:52Bryce was the only one who'd treat me well.
02:53I couldn't help falling for him.
02:55So I lost it, the night Bryce confessed to Chloe.
02:58Cried, screamed, tried to force him to break up with her.
03:01In the end, I jumped off this bridge that night.
03:04And what happened?
03:05Nearly died.
03:06Bryce stayed at the hospital for five minutes,
03:08then walked out without mercy.
03:10The Mercers, the family that adopted me,
03:13were humiliated by the suicide attempt.
03:15And since Bryce had made his position clear,
03:17I had no use to them anymore.
03:19They sent me back to my birth records.
03:21A pair of drunks, who dealt drugs,
03:23ran a brothel.
03:24The worst kind of people.
03:25After that, my life just spiraled.
03:27I died alone, in some foreign country.
03:30After I died, the one who buried me was him.
03:33The one I'd always been afraid of.
03:35The one I'd kept at a distance.
03:37And Bryce?
03:38He was a newlywed by then, riding high.
03:40He never showed up.
03:42Not once.
03:42If I hadn't already lived this once,
03:44I'd be blowing up Bryce's phone right now.
03:47I would threaten to kill myself,
03:48and about to jump.
03:49But now, I have a chance.
03:51A chance to change my terrible future.
03:53The third time I dialed the number,
03:55he finally picked up.
03:58Roman Hawthorne.
03:59The name rolled on my tongue a few times.
04:01Then I finally saved it.
04:03The rain was coming down so hard,
04:05shutting out the rest of the world.
04:06Only Roman's voice came forward.
04:08Clara?
04:09Roman, it's really coming down.
04:11I'm stuck by the bridge.
04:12Can you come get me?
04:14The line went quiet for a few seconds.
04:16I squeezed the umbrella handle,
04:18palm slick with sweat.
04:19Last time, the day Roman buried me,
04:22he cried.
04:22Even in the memory,
04:23I could feel how hot they were.
04:25After the funeral,
04:26he gripped a pearl earring,
04:27silent.
04:28He stayed alone the rest of his life.
04:30I couldn't help it.
04:31A small sob slipped out.
04:33Why are you crying?
04:34Same cold, distant tone as always.
04:37Almost annoyed.
04:38I didn't say I wouldn't come.
04:39Then when are you coming?
04:41Wait me.
04:4220 minutes.
04:44Okay.
04:44I'll wait for you, Roman.
04:45He didn't say anything else.
04:47The line went dead.
04:4815 minutes later,
04:49I gave my umbrella to a mom and kid
04:50trying to take cover.
04:51So, by the time Roman got there,
04:53I was soaked through.
04:55My clothes clung to my bulky frame,
04:57exposing every flaw I desperately wanted to hide.
05:00Roman.
05:00I opened the passenger door,
05:02keeping my head down,
05:03trying to take up as little space as possible.
05:05He didn't say a single word,
05:06just cranked the car's heater up.
05:10Clara,
05:11you might as well just be done with it.
05:12Die of stupidity.
05:13Then he grabbed a cashmere blanket from the back
05:15and tossed it over me.
05:17Dry off.
05:17Don't get my leather dirty.
05:20Okay.
05:21He focused on driving.
05:23I couldn't help stealing a glance at him.
05:24When he wasn't smiling,
05:25he always looked unreachable,
05:27cold.
05:28Tons of girls at school liked him,
05:29but none of them dared to confess.
05:31He and Bryce were roommates.
05:32I'd been to Bryce's dorm a lot.
05:34Every time I went,
05:35Roman acted like he hated me,
05:37even now.
05:38He came to get me,
05:39but the attitude was still freezing.
05:40There was nothing about him that said
05:42he'd been quietly in love with me
05:43the whole time.
05:44I dropped my eyes.
05:45Everything from the memory
05:46had really happened,
05:47but I still couldn't believe
05:48anyone could love someone like me.
05:50Would Roman love me?
05:51Was it all just a misunderstanding?
05:52Or was I just fooling myself?
05:55Back to your dorm.
05:56My heart skipped.
05:57Before I could stop myself,
05:58I said it.
05:58Back to yours.
05:59Roman's hands tightened on the wheel.
06:02Bryce isn't coming back tonight.
06:05I know.
06:06I'm not looking for him.
06:08The car suddenly braked hard at the curb.
06:11The cold in Roman's eyes
06:13made my chest tighten.
06:15Clara,
06:15don't fucking use me
06:17as part of whatever game
06:17you two are playing.
06:18I'm not.
06:22I'll call you an Uber.
06:24You go back yourself.
06:25Roman.
06:26I grabbed his phone
06:27out of his hand.
06:28Clara.
06:29But there was no anger
06:30in his eyes.
06:31No disgust at me.
06:33Just something dark
06:34and deep.
06:35Suddenly,
06:35I felt a sadness
06:36I couldn't quite put into words.
06:38Roman,
06:38I don't want to go back to my dorm.
06:39The other girls all laugh at me.
06:41And I'm afraid of going home.
06:44Can I just stay at your place tonight?
06:46I mean,
06:46if you really hate me,
06:47if you really don't want to see me,
06:49then forget it.
06:50Roman didn't say a single word.
06:52But he started the car again.
06:54It headed toward campus.
06:56Stopped in front of his dorm building
06:57in the end.
06:58I followed Roman inside.
07:02Bathroom's that way.
07:04I showered.
07:05Threw the hoodie on.
07:06It was a men's hoodie,
07:07yet it fit me perfectly.
07:09My face burning with humiliation.
07:12Roman glanced at me once.
07:13Looked away.
07:14I thought he was disgusted by me.
07:16So I didn't notice his ears turning red.
07:18I walked past Bryce's bed
07:20and sat down on Roman's.
07:22The shampoo and body wash on me.
07:23All of it smelled like Roman.
07:25In that small room,
07:26the same scent.
07:29Going for smoke.
07:30He stepped out onto the balcony.
07:32I looked around his room,
07:33curious,
07:34clean,
07:35neat.
07:35I was just about to check out
07:36what he kept on his desk.
07:38Then my phone buzzed.
07:39Bryce's name lit up the screen.
07:41I didn't pick up.
07:42It rang again right away,
07:43like he wasn't going to stop.
07:45I just switched the phone to silent,
07:46dropped it back in my bag.
07:49Roman?
07:51What is it?
07:52We held eye contact for two seconds
07:53before he looked away.
07:55Maybe I was imagining it,
07:56but his face looked a little flushed.
07:57I'm so sorry,
07:58but I got your sheets wet.
08:00How am I supposed to sleep tonight?
08:01He glanced at me,
08:02then at the wet spots on the sheets.
08:04He turned
08:04and grabbed a towel from me.
08:06Go dry your hair first.
08:07I'll change the sheets,
08:08then you can sleep.
08:09He went to the closet for clean ones.
08:10I thought about how red his ears had just gotten.
08:13My heart skipped a beat.
08:14By the time I came out with my hair dry,
08:16Roman had finished changing the sheets.
08:17Go to sleep.
08:19What about you?
08:20Roman picked up his book.
08:21Reading.
08:22Oh.
08:23Just about to open it
08:24when his phone rang.
08:28Bryce?
08:29What's up?
08:29My heart jumped.
08:30Yeah, I'm in the dorm.
08:31I held my breath without thinking.
08:32You're saying someone saw Clara
08:34at our building?
08:34I didn't wait for him to finish.
08:36I rushed over
08:37and instinctively reached for the phone,
08:38but accidentally,
08:39I grabbed Roman's hand.
08:40It was burning hot.
08:41Sorry.
08:42But Roman grabbed my wrist instead,
08:44suddenly.
08:45Too close.
08:45I could see the vein
08:46at the side of his neck tense up,
08:48pushing against the skin.
08:49His throat was working.
08:50His heart was hammered.
08:51Hello, Roman.
08:52Are you there?
08:53Maybe I was so nervous
08:54that I lost my head.
08:55Roman, tell him I'm not here.
08:57Please.
