00:00I saw an interesting question in Twitter.
00:03How to become a high-value woman?
00:06And I feel compelled to respond.
00:09The concept of a high-value woman originates from psychological articles
00:14where journalists and psychologists offer advice on finding the right partner.
00:20The ideal partner is portrayed as a man who respects his beloved,
00:24sees her intrinsic value and invests emotionally and materially in the relationship.
00:36The authors of these articles assume that men evaluate a woman's behavior and manners
00:42to decide if she is worthy of respect, treating her accordingly.
00:47If she is high-value, the world's treasures are laid at her feet.
00:52If not, she ends up being drained of her resources.
00:58I check the typical advice given.
01:01First, act as if you are a prize and the relationship with you is a significant weight.
01:08Second, show that you can easily find another man.
01:13Third, maintain standards and clear expectations about how you should be treated.
01:18Fourth, never chase after men.
01:23Fifth, accept a man's attention as a given without feeling in debt.
01:32What do we see here?
01:34A fictional narrative better suited for movies and romance novels than real life.
01:40This narrative assumes all men are the same, wanting the same things,
01:46and that women live in a vacuum, able to change their story, habits, and character at will.
01:53Take Jennifer as an example.
01:56She is 34.
01:58A nurse, sweet, shy, and slightly overweight.
02:01Her past relationships ended in painful breakups.
02:05She desperately wants love and fears she'll never find the right one.
02:10Her parents divorced.
02:12And her stepfather wasn't particularly attentive to her mother.
02:17That was not the norm in their family.
02:20Even if Jennifer wanted to act like a prize, she couldn't.
02:24When she falls in love, she gives her all to her partner.
02:28That's how she shows love.
02:30Yes, it may look like she's chasing after men.
02:34But when she tried following the advice mentioned above, it backfired.
02:40She felt selfish, and her boyfriend wasn't intrigued.
02:44Instead, he got upset, leading to another breakup.
02:49So, does this mean Jennifer can't expect mutual love and respect
02:52because she can't act like a high-value woman?
03:01Thankfully, real life isn't like those articles suggest.
03:05Men are diverse and are drawn to different types of women.
03:09Some men do admire prize women, but not all.
03:13Prize chasing is typical of personality archetypes like hunters,
03:17but even then, only under certain conditions.
03:21When a hunter needs to impress friends or colleagues to prove his worth.
03:25Another scenario, aging champions.
03:29This personality subtype craves recognition and adoration,
03:33and sometimes they chase glamorous women to affirm they deserve the best.
03:39Life is rich with variety, and there are many types of relationships.
03:44Some men don't need a prize woman at all.
03:47Imagine a biochemist developing a new cancer drug.
03:50He is immersed in his science, and the most appealing woman to him
03:55is someone who shares his interests and values his work.
03:59He needs a partner he can talk to about what matters to him,
04:03and someone he can rely on.
04:06If you show him you could easily find another man,
04:09he won't be drawn to you.
04:12Instead, he might get upset and find someone else too.
04:22Moreover, a man exists with a certain environment,
04:25and he will consciously or unconsciously adhere to its standards.
04:30In some societies, a woman of a different faith won't be accepted,
04:36no matter how smart, beautiful, or successful she is.
04:40In other places, a model like appearance might draw mockery rather than admiration.
04:48A woman's value is determined by the qualities valued in her environment
04:53and by the man in question.
04:55Some prioritize appearance, others deep conversations,
05:00shared knowledge, or join hiking trips or gym sessions.
05:04If a woman wants to be loved and respected for who she truly is,
05:10she doesn't need to adopt the high-value persona those articles push.
05:16Instead, she should focus on self-reflection
05:19to understand the type of man
05:21who would genuinely appreciate her natural qualities.
05:26Today, while walking my dog, I ran into my neighbors.
05:30They are both short, old, and far from resembling movie stars.
05:35But there they were, strolling hand in hand,
05:40deeply engaged in conversation.
05:42They always walk like that,
05:44and it's clear they share a true love.
05:47To each other, they are the very best.
05:55To each other, they are the same person.
05:55and they are the same person who understands.
05:55You each otherām can see,
05:55you are the same person who's attached to the blue aleem
05:55and you ask that to choose to choose the contrast.
05:56But at the same level,
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