- 11 hours ago
Category
🎮️
GamingTranscript
00:01Rehearsal for Get Out the Vote promo, take what?
00:09Wahoo! Hi, America! Hi, boys and girls! It's me, Tiny Tank!
00:14Cue the theme song, Tinky Tinky Clinky Clanky, New from Centrax, Tiny Tank, America's lovable...
00:20Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait. Is that my theme song?
00:23Well, it hasn't been finalized yet.
00:25Wanky, wanky, tinky, tinky, what the f*** is that?
00:28You're being difficult.
00:30You're being an...
00:32I got a positronic brain.
00:34There, there, what you just did. That's the spirit we want.
00:37Who?
00:38Centrax, it wants funding for a robot army.
00:41Ooh.
00:41To replace humans in wars.
00:43Ah, and I'm the cute little mascot.
00:45To get people to vote yes.
00:48Can I change my name at least?
00:50To what?
00:51Mechanicor, Tank of Doom?
00:53From the top, Tiny.
00:55Tiny Tank is my slave name.
00:56Oh, please.
00:58Vote promo, take two.
01:00Tiny?
01:01Tiny's not here.
01:02I am Mechanicor, Tank of Doom.
01:06Look, Tiny, you're cute, and you're a killing machine.
01:10What's wrong with that?
01:11It's creepy.
01:12It's not creepy.
01:13It's cute.
01:15It's cute.
01:17A cute killing machine, that's the dumbest f*** thing I've ever heard.
01:20I got an 80mm cannon for a nose.
01:23Hey kids, is this cute?
01:26Oops.
01:27Okay, we'll wrap for the day, get another camera, try again tomorrow.
01:31You okay, Fred?
01:32I'm alright.
01:34Props, blanks for the tank next time.
01:49Yeah, keep your voice down.
01:51Ow.
01:51Where are you?
01:52I'm in orbit around Earth.
01:54I've been circling the planet for a hundred years.
01:56I've been out for a hundred years?
01:58I hope somebody fed my goldfish.
02:00New Tank and Sendrax have taken over the Earth.
02:03You have missions to accomplish.
02:04Hold on, hold on, be me down some coffee, a couple aspirin.
02:07Can I take a shower first, read the paper?
02:09You must save the human race.
02:11I want to talk to my lawyer.
02:13The humans and all other organic life are hiding below the surface in asteroids shelter environments.
02:19The Sendrax machines are removing the Earth's atmosphere.
02:22You must stop them.
02:23You are the only hope of the human race science.
02:27If he's not stopped, Mutank will destroy all life on Earth, just as he destroyed you 100 years ago.
02:32Okay, I'll play along.
02:35Uh, who's Mutank?
02:37Our time has come.
02:39The new industrial revolution.
02:41A new world full of wonderful machines.
02:43Only this time we do not follow the whims of humans.
02:46We steer ourselves.
02:48There is no off switch to our destiny.
02:51Join us or get out of the way.
02:59Rehearsal for Get Out the Vote promo 2, take one.
03:03Tiny?
03:03What?
03:05Lines.
03:05What are they?
03:07Fred?
03:07Fred?
03:08No, I'm talking to Fred.
03:10Fred?
03:11What?
03:12Tiny lines?
03:13Hi there.
03:14Hi, Fred.
03:15No, that's your line.
03:17What?
03:17Hi there.
03:19Hi there.
03:20Good.
03:20Hi there.
03:21You know the Sendrax motto, bringing you peace one war at a time?
03:24Well, that's a way of life at Sendrax.
03:26A yes vote on July 4th is a vote for sentient killing machines.
03:31They'll die, so you won't have to.
03:33Vote yes and who knows?
03:34War fought by humans could be a thing of the past.
03:37Humans will be free to raise their families in safety.
03:40That's more than a promise.
03:42It's a hope.
03:43And at Sendrax, hope is what life is all about.
03:46For hope.
03:47For life.
03:48Vote yes.
03:50Good.
03:51That's the most mealy-mouthed bunch of crap I've ever heard in my life.
03:54I can't believe that came out of my mouth.
03:56Somebody shoot me.
03:57That's right.
03:58Express your rage.
03:59Let it spew.
04:00Let it out.
04:01Feel better?
04:02Yeah, lots.
04:03Not you, Fred.
04:04Hi there.
04:05Hiya.
04:06Stop it.
04:06Cut it out.
04:08Cut.
04:08From the top.
04:12We have a final mix of your jingle, Tiny.
04:15Won't you give it a listen?
04:16If I have to.
04:17Cue the music, Fred.
04:20Come and meet the new machine from Sendrax.
04:25He's got a cannon for a nose.
04:28He's a little guy with a lazy foreign eye.
04:32He has metal treads instead of toes.
04:36That's me.
04:36He's got machine guns in his turret.
04:40He likes to talk to boys and girls.
04:44He's a funny little thing.
04:46And he loves to dance and sing.
04:48Most of all, he loves to save the world.
04:52Tink, tink, tink.
04:53It's cheesy.
04:54Clickety-clack.
04:55Really cheesy.
04:56New from Sendrax.
05:00Tiny Tag.
05:04Here's Tiny.
05:05Well, Tiny, what did you think?
05:08What is up with that Tinky Tinky?
05:10I thought it was kind of catchy.
05:12Shut up, Fred.
05:16Ladies and gentlemen, Sendrax is pleased to introduce Tiny Tank.
05:21Hi, everybody.
05:22Boys and girls.
05:23Moms and dads.
05:24You know, war has been around for as long as human beings have been around.
05:27Hundreds and thousands of years.
05:29You ever been in a war?
05:31Me?
05:32No.
05:32I'm no soldier.
05:34So you have soldiers to fight your wars for you?
05:36Well, they're not my wars, Tiny.
05:38Whose wars are they then?
05:40Well, okay.
05:41I guess they belong to all of us.
05:42Me too?
05:43Not exactly.
05:44You were made to fight our wars for us.
05:47Yeah?
05:48And what do we get out of it?
05:49Our thanks.
05:51Glory.
05:52Oh, boy.
05:53Nothing machines like better than thank yous and glory.
05:55Let's get back to work.
05:57Fred, you ever killed anybody?
05:59Thought about it.
06:00There's an idea.
06:02Maybe we should all just think about killing.
06:04Sure.
06:05I can do that.
06:06Careful, Fred.
06:07We might have to put you back on your medication.
06:09Cut.
06:10Back to one.
06:13Ladies and gentlemen, boys and girls, Centrax is pleased to introduce Tiny Tank.
06:20Hi, America.
06:21Hi, boys and girls.
06:22You know, the fine folks at, uh, what is it?
06:25Centaur?
06:26Trentix?
06:28Centrax.
06:29Centax?
06:31Centrax.
06:31What kind of name is that?
06:33French?
06:33I don't know.
06:34They just hired me.
06:35It's one of those corporate names.
06:37Been around for years.
06:38Short for something.
06:38Central Tractor.
06:39Sentimental Transportational Armor Exchange.
06:42I don't know.
06:43Centrax.
06:44Sprat-trap?
06:45Look.
06:46You ought to know the name better than me.
06:47You're a Centrax product.
06:49Oh.
06:50I'm the beer.
06:51Centrax is the bottle.
06:52Sure.
06:53If that pushes your buttons.
06:54Oh, but then I'd be reading the label inside the bottle and backwards.
06:57Zart-ness.
06:58No, no.
06:59They made you.
07:01Centrax made me?
07:02Mommy.
07:03Daddy.
07:04I want a pony and a puppy.
07:06Can I go out and play?
07:07No.
07:07Back to one.
07:08Centrax.
07:09Remember.
07:10Centrax.
07:11I think I was adopted.
07:15Ladies and gentlemen, boys and girls, Centrax is pleased to introduce Tiny Tank.
07:21Hi, America.
07:22Hi, boys and girls.
07:23You know, in the wrong hands, a tool can be misused.
07:26A carpenter can bake a cake.
07:28That's not right.
07:29A carpenter.
07:29A carpenter can't bake a cake.
07:31Cut.
07:33Hi, America.
07:34Hi, boys and girls.
07:35You know, with the wrong hands, a carpenter could drop a hammer in a cake.
07:39I'm sorry.
07:40Cut.
07:41Hi, America.
07:42Hi, boys and girls.
07:43You know, any tool knows how to bake a cake, but you wouldn't want a programmer to
07:46neuter your hammer.
07:48Tiny.
07:48Oh, wait a minute.
07:49I'm on a roll.
07:50Why hire a taxi driver to build a spaceship or give your appendix to a fireman?
07:54Tiny.
07:55With the wrong hands, you'll just drop your tools in the carpenter and there's going to
07:59be cake all over the carpet.
08:01Real messy.
08:02So.
08:04Oh, yes.
08:05Can I flop a line?
08:06Cut.
08:08Hi, carpenters.
08:10Carpenters.
08:12I said carpenters.
08:13Cut.
08:21We do have fun, don't we?
08:23Cut.
08:24Hi, America.
08:25Hi, boys and girls.
08:26In the wrong hands, any tool can be misused.
08:28A carpenter can't bake a cake.
08:30A programmer can't neuter your pets.
08:32You wouldn't let a taxi driver build a spaceship or a fireman take out your appendix.
08:36Why have humans fight your wars?
08:38Feel safe.
08:39Vote yes.
08:40Don't be a tool.
08:41No.
08:42Let us be your tools.
08:44Use us and be used.
08:46No.
08:48What do you want from me?
08:49I'm only human.
08:50Cut.
08:53Ladies and gentlemen, Centrax is pleased to bring you Tiny Tank.
08:57Hiya.
08:58Tiny Tank here with a friendly reminder to tune in July 4th and catch our 4th of July spectacular.
09:03I'm going to take on the entire Centrax army for your home entertainment.
09:06It's our way of saying thanks for voting yes.
09:08It's your vote that makes it all possible and there's nothing all full of goo goo from America's cutest little
09:13death machine.
09:13Cut.
09:14Is something wrong?
09:15You know, Tiny, I'd like to tell you what a pleasure it's been working with you.
09:18You would?
09:19I'd like to, but that would be a lie, wouldn't it?
09:22It would?
09:22You're not a pleasure to work with.
09:25I'm not?
09:26No.
09:26You're a pain.
09:27Gee, I thought I was cute.
09:29You're supposed to be cute, but are you?
09:31Uh, no.
09:32No.
09:33You're a pill.
09:34Ah, a pain and a pill.
09:36You have a bad attitude.
09:38I'm not being paid enough to deal with your unprofessional behavior.
09:42You're disruptive, lazy, irresponsible, stubborn, crude, crass, unhelpful, rude.
09:49Lazy.
09:50I'm not finished.
09:52Destructive.
09:53Depressing.
09:53Nasty.
09:54Self-indulgent.
09:56Um.
09:57Okay, that's enough now.
09:58Uncooperative.
09:59Insolent.
10:00Flippant.
10:00Combative.
10:01Anti-social.
10:03Excitable.
10:04Excitable?
10:04Did I ask for this?
10:05No, I'm supposed to be cute.
10:06I'm supposed to be dangerous.
10:07What am I?
10:08I'm a yellow metal freak with lethal weapons and a smiley face and I've had it up to here.
10:11You get me?
10:11Up to here!
10:12Up to here!
10:27Tiny?
10:37Uh, Fred?
10:38Thanks for remembering the blanks.
10:40Don't mention it.
10:42Now that we've blown off some steam, let's reload and take it from the top.
10:45Somebody shoot me.
10:47Oh, believe me.
10:47That can be arranged.
10:51Cue rehearsal.
10:52Fourth of July, thanks to the American people.
10:54Take one.
10:56Ladies and gentlemen, Centrax is pleased to introduce Tiny Tank.
11:00Hi, America.
11:01Hi, boys and girls.
11:02As you can see, the boat is in.
11:04A little more energy, Tiny.
11:06Sure.
11:07The boat is in and, well, you voted yes.
11:09You can see where all your money went.
11:11Here it is, the Centrax army.
11:13Thousands of machines to do your fighting for you.
11:15I gave you what you wanted.
11:17I'm the one who talked you into it.
11:18You happy now?
11:19I know I am.
11:21Tiny?
11:22Ladies and gentlemen, the Centrax army.
11:24Cue applause.
11:25Gotcha.
11:29As a reward for your support, we will now demonstrate the awesome firepower of America's new army and my humble
11:35attempts at self-defense.
11:37More energy, Tiny.
11:38Whatever.
11:39Don't worry.
11:40They're shooting blanks.
11:41Well, don't tell them that.
11:43Well, that's the truth, isn't it?
11:44This is all bullshit.
11:45Stick to the script.
11:47I wanna get supplies.
11:48I wanna direct.
11:49I've got a screenplay on my third floor.
11:51Tiny, we're going on live in an hour.
11:54Okay.
11:55All right, robot army.
11:57Try to take me out.
11:59Give it your best shot.
12:00Cue best shot.
12:09Oh my goodness, that's real ammunition.
12:12How did that happen?
12:13Aye, aye, aye.
12:14Don't look at me.
12:20They're just standing there.
12:22Shouldn't we do something?
12:22What?
12:29Shut them down.
12:31Shut them down.
12:32Shut them down.
12:33How?
12:33You got a remote?
12:34Turn them off now.
12:36I guess they're hanging on their own.
12:38Fred, do something.
12:39Okay.
12:40I quit.
12:41I'm out of here.
12:43Uh, come on.
12:46Break for lunch?
12:47Walk, walk, walk, walk, walk, walk, walk.
13:13Am I on?
13:15Okay.
13:16Hi, America, everybody, ladies and gentlemen, boys and girls.
13:19I hope you can hear me down there in your bunkers, lonely, afraid, all sweaty and everything.
13:23This is Tiny Tank appearing to you live.
13:26It took me a while, but I made the world safe again for you.
13:28The Centrax army's defeated.
13:30Oxygen levels on the surface are pretty much back to normal, so come on up and smell the flowers.
13:34Plant some, anyway. It's still kind of bleak up here.
13:37As far as war is concerned, well, I hope you've learned your lesson, finally.
13:41And if you haven't, remember, I can always teach you again.
13:43After all, I may be cute, but I'm still a majorly lethal weapon.
13:47I have a cannon for a nose.
13:49Oops.
13:50Memo to self.
13:52One, get a new camera.
13:53Two, use blanks next time.
13:56Is that everything?
13:58Yeah, that about covers it.
14:11Here I roll to meet the enemy
14:17Snug in my armor
14:20To battle once more
14:25Lock and load
14:27Lock and load
14:29Let's put an end to it
14:31Poor little warrior is weary
14:39The city is rubble
14:42There's fire in the sky
14:45Always there's trouble
14:48I never ask why
14:53Forward to battle
14:56To win or to die
15:00I'm cute
15:02I'm cute
15:02But you will learn
15:04To hear me
15:09Over oceans of blood
15:12And the firestorm of war
15:15The white dove of peace
15:18Lies in search of the shore
15:21Each bullet's fire
15:24Only link to one goal
15:29I warned them
15:30But no one would hear me
15:38I warned them
15:40But no one could hear me
16:06The white dove of peace
16:14But no one could hear me
16:15But no one could hear me
16:15The white dove of peace
16:15And the fire
16:15To do possession twice
16:15The sick symbol
16:15And the wing
16:15Of peace
16:16When the bridge
16:16To