- 14 minutes ago
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🎥
Short filmTranscript
00:00The school budget, which Anderson single-handedly oversees, said we spent $129 on.
00:04Mouse pads. No mouse pads.
00:06You know how I feel about protecting Liz.
00:08I apologized.
00:09Previously on Elle.
00:10Robin's funeral will be in Denver, where most of her family lives.
00:13So I panicked and offered to throw her a memorial.
00:16Let me help.
00:17Whoever Robin was to you, thank you for being here today to pay your respects.
00:24I'm so sorry for your loss.
00:26I appreciate that.
00:27I kissed Elle.
00:28I don't want to look at you.
00:30I don't want to be around you.
00:31And you can tell, Elle, I am done with her, too.
00:33I don't want to lose Shannon as a friend.
00:53These are for you.
00:55And these are for your daughter.
00:58She's probably never going to speak to me again.
01:02I am so, so sorry.
01:06To both of you.
01:12You know, while I have you here, maybe you could put in a good word to Shannon?
01:16She's gone, too.
01:18Well, she's not dead, obviously.
01:20Not that there's anything wrong with that.
01:24But I'm so sorry.
01:25I kissed Miles.
01:28Your daughter had recently broken up with him.
01:31She broke up with him?
01:33I don't know if you caught that for you.
01:37You know.
01:39But I will make this right.
01:46Some of us are busy paying our respects here.
01:53Why isn't there a stop sign at this intersection?
01:58Why isn't there a stop sign at this intersection?
02:12One will suffice.
02:14Hi.
02:15I have this petition for a stop sign.
02:17There's this really dangerous intersection near our school.
02:20You'll see I have the requisite 1,000 signatures.
02:24So, you're going to win Shannon back with a stop sign?
02:28Seems like it would have been easier to just not kiss her boyfriend.
02:31Ex-boyfriend.
02:32She means ex-boyfriend.
02:35That detail's not for public consumption yet.
02:38And this isn't about Shannon and me.
02:40It's for the greater good.
02:42I can't undo the mistake I made, but this is something I can do.
02:47With your help, of course.
02:48According to our records, we already approved a stop sign at the corner of 50th and Evans last June, in
02:56fact.
02:57I can assure you, there is no such stop sign at said intersection.
03:01We approved the stop sign, but the school elected to handle contracting themselves.
03:07Sorry, I don't understand.
03:09Are you saying someone ordered a stop sign but never paid for it?
03:14It says right here.
03:15One stop sign requested by and granted to Rainier West High School Board, point of contact, Shane Anderson.
03:25I'm only happy when it rains
03:28I'm only happy when it's complicated
03:32I know, I know you can't appreciate it
03:36I'm only happy when it rains
03:48You'll want to hear about my new obsession
03:56I'm like, no, I know you can't appreciate it
04:00I'm only happy when it rains
04:05You'll want to hear about my new obsession
04:08I'm riding high upon a deep depression
04:12I'm only happy when it rains
04:15I'm only happy when it rains
04:18I'm only happy when it rains
04:27Are you following?
04:29Can you rewind a little bit?
04:31Some video store humor for you there
04:33But also I mean it, go back a little
04:35Sure, Principal Anderson either forgot to purchase the stop sign he ordered for the school entrance
04:41Or he got the school board to cough up the money and took it for himself
04:44Just like he did with the yield sign and the two-note parking signs by the truck
04:47Anderson requested and received $15,600 from the school board for campus signs alone
04:53And that doesn't even include mouse pads, tater tots, gym mats, and a bunch of other stuff we found in
04:57the school budget that doesn't exist in real life
04:59Hmm
05:00Did you pay for that candy?
05:02As if I'm going to put Blockbuster out of business, they'll be fine
05:06This is what got you fired in the first place
05:08Alright, I know you're all very excited by this theory
05:10But I think you should direct your amateur detective efforts elsewhere
05:17What is he doing here?
05:19Hey, uh, Dustin called me, filled me in
05:21Why would you do that?
05:23We can use the extra brain pilot, plus he's Shannon's boyfriend
05:28X
05:32What am I missing?
05:33There aren't a friendship sabbatical
05:35I'm just here to help
05:41Anyway, you were Principal Anderson's secretary for two years
05:45Do you think he could have stolen all that money?
05:47I don't know, I'm such a rule follower
05:50Well, the teachers love him, parents love him
05:54He was just a finalist for State Principal of the Year
05:57People spoke
05:58But, but, he sucks
06:01Fine, but you can't just order things and not buy them
06:06There is a record
06:07And plus, I would know
06:08I've spent hours filing receipts and invoices
06:11Did he have receipts for the stuff we don't have?
06:13Mousepads, tater tots, gym mats
06:15I don't know
06:16Because I'm staying out of it
06:18Hypothetically, where would these receipts be?
06:20In his file cabinet in his office, which is always locked
06:24Can we break in?
06:25If it opens, it can be broken into
06:27Oh
06:28I have a lot of bobby pins from my French twist period
06:34We steal Frank's master key
06:35Got it
06:36Wait, Frank the maintenance guy? I thought he was fired
06:37His schedule got shifted to weekends
06:39Budget cuts
06:41Yeah, good luck
06:42When I'd ask Frank for the key to the snack closet
06:44He'd say, from my cold, dead hand
06:46Right, because you have to pay for snacks
06:47Oh, wow
06:48Okay, so let's say we somehow get into the school on Saturday
06:52Get the key off Frank
06:53What do we do?
06:54We break into Anderson's office
06:55Make copies of the receipts
06:57Cross-reference them with the budget
06:59If anything's missing, that's evidence we can take to the school board
07:02Easy
07:02Now we just need an excuse to be in school
07:05Over the weekend
07:09Guys
07:20Hello, Rainier West High
07:21This is Liz Miller coming to you live from the A.B. room
07:24Please rise for the national anthem
07:37Coming through
07:41Dustin, principal's office, now
07:46This period was not designed for you to take a nap
07:53Take that to the principal's office
08:11For you
08:16From the League of Women Voters
08:19Thank you
08:35Listen up
08:37Operation manifest Anderson's demise
08:40By breaking into his office to expose his hypocrisy
08:43Starts now
08:45Subtle
08:46Once the detention monitor gets here
08:48We'll initiate base one
08:50Key loop sabotage
08:52I took the liberty of fleshing out the plan a bit
08:55What's that smell?
09:00Is this lavender scented?
09:03Great nose, Liz
09:05Lavender is a naturally calming fragrance
09:07And heists are known to be quite nervy
09:10Whoa
09:11When did detention get so uncool?
09:14I'm sorry, what are you doing here?
09:16Oh, turns out nine tardies is six too many
09:19So
09:21Didn't expect to see good girl Barbie serving time
09:23What'd you do?
09:24Turn in an English essay in the dialect of a valley girl?
09:28I don't speak valley
09:30I only go there for sushi and designer discounts
09:33Oh
09:33Yeah, Elle's actually the biggest badass here
09:36Really?
09:38Enlighten me
09:40Pied Anderson in the face?
09:42Don't want to talk about it
09:43Elle Woods pied the principal
09:45That's shockingly epic
09:49Thank you
09:50But it's now 9.23am
09:53Does detention not start at 9.15?
09:56Where's our monitor?
09:59Here we go
10:00I heard that
10:03You forgot your lunch
10:04Oh, I didn't
10:09I think someone might miss being at school
10:11Okay, delinquents
10:14Here's how this is going to work
10:16Every one of these books
10:18It's going to be reshelled by 3.00pm
10:20So get friendly with our Dewey Decimal System
10:33Phase one
10:50May I please request the hall pass?
11:07Frank
11:08Frank
11:09Frank
11:10Frank
11:12Frank
11:13Frank
11:26Frank
11:28Frank
11:30Frank
11:33Frank
11:34Frank
11:34Frank
11:47I'll show you back by now.
11:519.15, cut key loop.
11:5310.15, flood toilets.
11:55What does this mean?
11:55Why does it smell like my grandma?
11:57Not for you.
12:02Okay, you guys are being even more...
12:05yourselves than usual.
12:07Did you Trojan horse yourselves into detention?
12:09What's going on?
12:10Okay, why don't you go stack some books?
12:11I should know if I'm about to become an unwitting accomplice
12:13to some lame secret operation.
12:16Guys, um, she could actually be useful.
12:20Oh, thank you.
12:21Why, do we have a role for an overly confident mean girl?
12:24This is Martindale.
12:25I think my fellow delinquents are up to something shady.
12:26Okay, you have no idea what you're doing.
12:28As I said moments ago, I would love to be in the loop.
12:35Fine.
12:36We think someone here at a very high level is embezzling money from the school.
12:43So you all wasted the only sunny Saturday in the last two months to, what, care?
12:49You're right.
12:50Super useful.
12:51Okay, I'm sorry.
12:51It's not like it's our own personal money.
12:53The stolen funds were meant for a stop sign in the intersection where Robin had her accident.
13:00Count me in.
13:01Who do I bludgeon?
13:03Anderson.
13:04We need to break into his office to prove it.
13:19What the?
13:22Great.
13:37Oh.
13:39Miss Burke.
13:40Hi.
13:42Hi.
13:43Oh.
13:44I'm just coming from the bathroom.
13:47You know, taking the scenic route.
13:49Gotta keep the blood flowing, right?
13:52Detention's the enemy of cardiovascular hell.
13:55Detention?
13:56Doesn't sound like Elle Woods.
14:00If anyone asks, I threw a pie in Anderson's face.
14:04What?
14:05I didn't actually.
14:06But all my friends got detention, so I decided to join them for moral support.
14:13Oh.
14:14Protective and caring.
14:16How very cancer of you.
14:17Oh, I'm a Gemini.
14:19Oh.
14:20Maybe cusp then?
14:22No, my birthday's June 20th.
14:24Purebred Gemini.
14:25My sister is Gemini Rising.
14:28Or Gemini Moon.
14:30Or she dated a Gemini?
14:32Wow.
14:32I have got to call my sister.
14:33Yes.
14:34Sorry.
14:35Uh, you should get back to detention.
14:37Yes.
14:37Oh, wow.
14:38There is something I never thought I'd say to you.
14:40You and me both.
14:42Oh, don't forget to sign up for the science fair.
14:44Come on up.
14:46Welcome to Medina Town Hall.
14:48Like any other hall in any other town.
14:51And you brought me here to do what?
14:54Well, when we first met, you were very honest about my campaign needing a refresh.
15:00But I don't know anything about political speeches.
15:02You know about presentation.
15:05All right?
15:05If it wasn't for you, I would still have that mustache that nobody else told me made me look
15:09like a serial killer.
15:10And I would still be dressing like, um...
15:14Ted Bundy.
15:15I was going to say Jordan Catalano, but...
15:18From my so-called life?
15:19No.
15:22Here's my question.
15:24How do I get people to like me?
15:31You're going to be presenting here.
15:33And against that color scheme, you're going to be standing.
15:40All right, get up there.
15:41Let's see how the people will see you.
15:42Okay.
15:50Yikes.
15:52That's what I'm talking about.
15:53Nixon.
15:54Oh.
15:55He swept through his first debate with Kennedy.
15:56It cost him the entire election.
15:58Okay.
16:00We're going to need some powder foundation, some incandescent lighting, and I will send
16:06you to my chiropractor to work on your posture a bit.
16:09And I know you've been kind of experimenting with a few things up there, but I'm just going
16:14to fly out my hairstylist.
16:16Great.
16:18Great.
16:19You want to come check out my campaign office after this?
16:21Oh, I would love to, but I got to pick Elle up from detention at three.
16:26Detention?
16:27She seemed so sweet when she was cajoling me into renting a booth for her homecoming.
16:32Yeah, she has some ludicrous theory about her principal stealing funds from the school.
16:37Can you go to the other podium?
16:40Your better angle needs to face the TV cameras.
16:43Hold on.
16:44Elle thinks that Shane Anderson is stealing money.
16:47Yes, and she can be very convincing when she's invested in something.
16:54I think our best bet is to do this by candlelight.
17:07Phase one is complete.
17:08Is phase two killing Anderson?
17:11You guys told Kimberly?
17:12I was forced.
17:13Oh, like someone forced you to wear those pants.
17:15Remember when you got nicer?
17:17Can we go back to that?
17:18Okay, phase two.
17:19What does consolidate and secure personal care essentials mean?
17:40Can I help you?
17:42That looks so familiar.
17:45Oh, yeah, it's Cujo.
17:46I kind of thought it was banned.
17:48And I will therefore be prominently placing it right...
17:55Here.
17:57No.
17:58Your bracelet.
17:59Camp Saddle Rock.
18:01I saw it earlier and thought,
18:03Who have I seen wearing that before?
18:06And then I thought...
18:07Wait.
18:08Liz has that bracelet.
18:10And then I thought...
18:11Get there faster.
18:13Were you two at camp at the same time?
18:15Why in the world would that matter?
18:18I'm just trying to figure out what your damage is with each other.
18:21With you and me...
18:24We don't need to recap.
18:26But Liz is like the most neutral force ever.
18:29I'm sorry, but Liz is not neutral.
18:31Okay, so something did happen.
18:33Did you have a big fight?
18:35You know, this might shock you,
18:36but our lives didn't just start the second you appeared at this school.
18:49What the hell is a friendship sabbatical?
18:52What?
18:52You and the running man are being weird.
18:55What?
18:56No, we're not.
18:58Stop playing with fire.
18:59I'm not.
19:00Everyone's fine.
19:01You'll burn the place down.
19:06Why are the quiet ones always pyromaniacs?
19:09Isn't Coojo a band?
19:13I'm moving to self-help.
19:30So, uh, I hear you and I are on some sort of embargo.
19:36Embargo sabbatical.
19:37Where are we at thesaurus convention?
19:44Are you okay?
19:46Yep.
19:47You just shelved R.L. Stine in self-help.
19:52One could argue his entire repertoire is a metaphor for the horrors of teen adolescence.
19:58One could.
20:02I messed up.
20:05Maybe I shouldn't have told Shannon.
20:08You were tiki drunk at her mom's memorial.
20:11I know.
20:12I screwed up.
20:14But we both tried calling her.
20:16She doesn't want to talk to us.
20:19Not sure what else we can do.
20:20Nothing.
20:21We do nothing.
20:23No more extended eye contact.
20:25No more leaning against lockers.
20:27No more...
20:28What, speaking to each other?
20:29I think we should avoid anything involving mouths.
20:34Okay.
20:36Can I ask?
20:38Respectfully.
20:39Why?
20:41I mean, she already knows.
20:43She's not here.
20:48Because it's just not me, Miles.
20:51I'm not that kind of girl.
21:00Uh, there's a plumbing emergency in the ladies' room.
21:03Um...
21:03What?
21:04Did you say something?
21:06Toilets!
21:08Exploded.
21:10I'll call Frank.
21:18How's my cue?
21:20Good luck.
21:30Oh, come on.
21:47Come on, come on, come on.
21:50Why does every key look the same?
21:53Miles?
21:56Principal Anderson.
22:01Come on.
22:04Hey.
22:05Did you drop this?
22:07Hilarious.
22:08I thought so.
22:09Yeah, do you come up with these ahead of time,
22:11or is this just, like, off the top of your head?
22:12I thought you think I'm funny.
22:14Here's an idea.
22:15Why don't you two stop fighting about...
22:18the mineral economy?
22:20And start getting ready for our next days.
22:22Hey, guys.
22:24We're screwed.
22:25Sixty-one tampons!
22:28And that's not to mention the super pluses.
22:30They got so engorged,
22:32they became one monster tampon rat king.
22:37It was screwed.
22:38Fire, blood, or flood.
22:39I am not to be bothered on my days off
22:42unless there's a fire, blood, or flood.
22:44And you all chose the latter.
22:47Mrs. Martindale,
22:48you may take the rest of the day off.
22:54They're all accounted for.
22:56The one in the hood, he's alive.
22:57He just looks comatose.
23:06Uh, Ms. Woods?
23:07Yeah, might I ask what you're doing here?
23:17I am here to serve my time,
23:19just like everyone else.
23:21Uh-huh.
23:22Well, I'm just looking at my roster here.
23:23I got the athlete,
23:25the basket case,
23:26the princess,
23:26the criminal,
23:27but no Elle Woods.
23:28So, what are you doing here, Ms. Woods?
23:33You remember.
23:35When I piked in the face.
23:39When you, I'm sorry, when you what?
23:41You know,
23:43when I piked in the face.
23:45I, no,
23:46I don't understand anything you're saying.
23:48When she piked you in the face.
23:51Oh, what, you,
23:53you mean the lemon meringue you gifted me
23:56for some woman thing?
23:59What?
24:02Seriously, why are you here?
24:09To scare myself straight.
24:10Well, I guess now you're here
24:13because you lied.
24:15New deal.
24:16No more hall passes.
24:19We are all staying put
24:21until three.
24:24What if we need to use the facilities?
24:26Then I guess you're gonna have to get familiar
24:28with the concept of holding it.
24:36Oh, my God.
24:38You're Ally Sheedy?
24:41Elle Woods.
24:42Now, in the Breakfast Club,
24:43there's the whole thing
24:44where they learn that Ally Sheedy
24:45didn't even have to be in detention.
24:46She just showed up.
24:51Okay, I couldn't do it.
24:52I really tried.
24:54I even went to his office with the pie.
24:56But I'm not a natural rule breaker.
24:59And the consequences really flashed
25:01before your eyes
25:02once you're face to face with them.
25:04Can you imagine what it's like inside her head?
25:06Wait, I'm sorry.
25:07I thought that I was Ally Sheedy
25:08and I thought that you were Molly Ringwald.
25:11Am I Molly Ringwald?
25:12Maybe we should have seen
25:14Cumming the L's bad at being bad.
25:16Guys, whatever.
25:17L's a model citizen.
25:18We knew this.
25:19We have more important things
25:20to deal with right now.
25:21We need a plan B.
25:23Okay.
25:45Yo, Kyle.
25:46Mm-hmm.
25:47Mm-hmm.
25:48Wake up.
25:49You wouldn't happen to have your, uh,
25:52you-know-what, would you?
25:54Have his what?
26:03All right, Mr. Jekkelson.
26:04See you soon.
26:09Principal Anderson, we need you to settle an argument for us.
26:13Do I actually need a pregnancy test
26:15to know that I'm pregnant?
26:17Uh...
26:18I vote yes.
26:19And I feel like those tests are just the patriarchy,
26:22trying to normalize corporations,
26:23charging women for something they already know
26:24about their own bodies.
26:25Good point.
26:26I do know when I'm ovulating.
26:28Mm-hmm.
26:29Thoughts?
26:30Um, well, have you talked to your parents about this?
26:34Oh, my parents are religious.
26:36We can't talk about sex.
26:39Yeah.
26:41Um, see Mrs. Nelson in the guidance counselor's office next week.
26:44I'm sure she has a pamphlet.
26:46Yeah, or something like that.
26:50Okay.
26:52Mm.
26:53I felt a kick.
26:54Oh.
26:55Oh?
26:56Is that a contraction?
26:57Yeah, I think that's what those feel like.
27:00Like, itches, right?
27:02Uh...
27:04Does anyone hear that?
27:06Hear what?
27:07I think it's coming from the ceiling.
27:09Oh, my God, is that a rat?
27:11Yeah.
27:12What?
27:13A rat?
27:14Yeah, you don't hear those old toenails?
27:15We should call maintenance.
27:17Mm.
27:18No, no, no, no, no.
27:19No, no, no.
27:21This can wait until Monday.
27:24Oh.
27:34Yikes.
27:35Yikes.
27:35Principal Anderson, if there is a rat trapped in our school air ducts, we, as the most evolved
27:41species of mammal in this room, are responsible for its well-being.
27:45It's a rat.
27:46A rat without access to food or water.
27:49Not to mention daylight.
27:51When was the last time these vents were cleaned?
27:53Anyone?
27:54I genuinely have no idea.
27:56Do I need to make a call into PETA's own Linda McCartney and alert her to the inhumane
28:02living conditions at Rainier West High?
28:04Also, if it dies, it'll smell really bad.
28:07Oh.
28:19Hey, Frank.
28:21It's Shane.
28:22Yeah.
28:23Uh, would you mind bringing a ladder up to the library?
28:27Oh, and a jar of peanut butter.
28:31For the rat.
28:32Not for me.
28:39Busy day.
28:40I noticed that, too.
28:48It sounds like he's right up here, Frank.
28:52Give me that peanut butter.
28:54No.
28:55No.
28:57No.
28:59No.
29:00No.
29:01No.
29:02No.
29:02No.
29:03No.
29:04No.
29:08No.
29:08Spot me?
29:09Oh, yeah.
29:38Gotcha!
29:43Giant freaking rat.
29:46That is no rat.
29:48That is a ferret.
29:51Okay, take it.
29:53I am not touching that.
29:57Kyle, how many times do we need to tell you
30:00no ferrets in school?
30:02Get up here!
30:08Would you mind telling us how that thing got in the vents?
30:12Yeah, I must have dozed off.
30:14Sir.
30:14I have six brothers and three sisters.
30:16Uh-huh.
30:17And this is the only place I really get any sleep.
30:19Okay, well then you'll be happy to know
30:21you're due back here next Saturday alone.
30:26Thank you very much, sir.
30:39Excuse me.
30:41Uh, Principal Anderson, I think Kimberly's trying to get your attention.
30:46What is it?
30:53Oh my God.
30:55Kimberly, do you have a peanut allergy?
30:59Aren't those fatal?
31:00Did you bring your EpiPen?
31:02You know, you should really make a habit of keeping an unexpired pin on your person at all times
31:07in the event of an anaphylactic emergency.
31:09Well, maybe if she doesn't die right now, she'll bear that in mind.
31:12Uh, no, there is one.
31:13It's in, uh, the nurse's office.
31:15Um, uh, keep her calm.
31:17Uh, and if any of you set foot outside this room, you will be expelled.
31:29God, I'm good.
31:30Jesus Christ.
31:33Told you she'd be useful.
31:34Okay, let's do this.
31:36Anderson's old.
31:37I gave him four minutes to get the pen in the tops.
31:40That gives me three.
31:41Yeah, are we sure we want to do this, guys?
31:43He said we could be expelled.
31:44Well, if anyone's going to do this quickly, it's going to be the fastest runner at this school.
31:51To me, I'm the fastest runner.
31:53We know.
31:54Okay, I'll see you at 11.21.
31:56Bye.
32:10For a second there, I thought you were in real danger.
32:12Have you considered pursuing the theatrical arts?
32:15Should someone be standing lookout?
32:34My old neighbor discovered the Culkin family at a diner.
32:36If you want to put yourself on tape, I could send it to her.
32:39Um, acting's not really my thing.
32:46Is that funny?
32:49Kinda, yeah, considering.
32:51Oh, really?
32:53Considering what?
32:55Oh, do you really need me to spell it out?
32:58Whatever.
32:58I might benefit from some spelling out.
33:08Okay.
33:09Okay.
33:13Okay.
33:16Okay.
33:18She's, she's, she's, she's.
33:19Kimberly's good at acting because she's in a perpetual state of performance.
33:24Okay, say what you want.
33:25I know who I am.
33:27Great.
33:27I know who you are, too.
33:28Great.
33:29Then we have something in common.
33:30You mean besides the fact you both have a thing for each other?
33:38Okay, okay.
33:40Come on, Shane.
33:41Come on, Shane.
33:44Happy pen.
33:47Happy pen.
33:48This book you were fighting about earlier features two ladies looking very wistful.
33:54Like, full of wist.
33:57You were making fun of Liz for reading it, but I looked inside and you had checked it out
34:01from the library yourself multiple times.
34:04And then you have that secret drawer full of secret things.
34:07Okay.
34:09All right.
34:11Okay.
34:12Okay.
34:12Don't wait.
34:13Uh, uh.
34:15Don't wait.
34:23What secret things?
34:24Your scenes.
34:25And also that camp bracelet.
34:27You went through my stuff?
34:28Not on purpose.
34:30But I think something happened between you two at that camp.
34:33Like, romantically.
34:35And now you're caught in this whole Sam and Diane thing.
34:39From tears.
34:40Cheers.
34:42Cheers.
34:47You don't hate each other.
34:50You like each other.
34:51It's so cute.
34:57I don't know where you're going with this one.
35:02Who's going on now?
35:03Oh my God.
35:05I did it again, didn't I?
35:06I don't know why my gaydar's so off.
35:09I mean, hearing myself say it, the camp thing did sound like a stretch.
35:16Anderson's on his way.
35:20But Miles should be back by now.
35:26And more.
35:36Guys, we need to do something.
35:43Oh, come on, Miles.
35:45Okay, what do we do?
35:47Um.
36:08Uh, quick question.
36:09What are you doing?
36:11Anderson won't notice Miles is missing if we're all missing.
36:15Oh!
36:17Oh!
36:45I can't believe you just did that.
36:47It's just a fire alarm, but it'll go off in a second.
36:49So let's get out of here.
36:53Oh, boy.
37:18The sprinklers didn't just go off, did they?
37:21Huh?
37:22They were triggered by one of you.
37:27Isn't that right, Dustin?
37:31Yeah.
37:31You want me to believe this doesn't fit right in on your rap sheet?
37:35Mascot vandalism, assembly without permission,
37:38flagrant and recurring skateboarding in the hallways,
37:40and now turning the entire school into your own personal swimming pool.
37:46Yeah.
37:46I'm sorry.
37:47This is all some big joke to you, huh, right?
37:49It's not funny.
37:51Okay.
37:51All right.
37:52Here's the deal, guys.
37:53Okay?
37:55Nobody wants to tell me who did this.
37:56We all come back here next Saturday, play this game all over again, huh?
38:00Would you like that?
38:02How's that sitting with you, Miles?
38:04Wait a second.
38:05Isn't that Notre Dame scout coming to your cross-country meet next week?
38:09You sure you want to miss that?
38:11Mm-hmm.
38:14Okay.
38:14Liz, you're going to miss another shift at Bad Vibrations while your mom works three jobs.
38:20That seems fair, huh?
38:22And you're on such thin ice already.
38:26Glad you pulled through, Kimberly.
38:28Yeah, I'm just relieved I was able to find that spare pen hidden in my inside backpack pocket.
38:33Oh, yeah.
38:34I mean, you're not even friends with these people.
38:37And now, you're willing to take the fall for them?
38:40Huh?
38:41Huh?
38:42Oh, I guess your parents won't be bragging about you at church tomorrow.
38:47And finally, Miss Woods.
38:53Aren't you above all this?
38:55You weren't even supposed to be here.
38:58And now, you're going to let some delinquent loser add destruction of school property to a flawless high school transcript.
39:05Dustin's not a delinquent loser.
39:06Okay, well, remember that next Saturday when you're sitting next to him.
39:11I actually won't be sitting next to him.
39:13Then start pointing fingers.
39:18Because it was me.
39:21No, it wasn't.
39:22It was.
39:23I did this.
39:25And I'm willing to serve my time.
39:27This isn't the Elwoods I know.
39:29Actually, Principal Anderson, a good intention turned unexpected mess is the Elwoods I know.
39:35And I've never felt more accountable in my life.
39:40Suit yourself.
39:42And apparently, I can't have you served attention in standing water, so I'm going to have to call it for
39:46today.
39:47But I will see you next weekend.
39:53Maybe you are that kind of girl.
40:12And in conclusion, that is why a second Saturday of detention is ultimately a net positive.
40:19While we have not confirmed the existence of the stolen funds, we do believe once we find a discrepancy in
40:25Anderson's paper trail, we will have the proof we need to expose his fraud.
40:29And where is this paper trail?
40:32Developing at Walgreens.
40:33Okay, El, I didn't love when you got detention in the first place, but you started a fire and flooded
40:40your entire campus.
40:44I've started researching teen wilderness programs.
40:48I couldn't let Miles get expelled.
40:50And maybe there are other sides to me.
40:53Maybe I'm not the rule-abiding Gemini, I always thought.
40:56I mean, even Miss Burke accused me of being a Cancer.
40:59I hope this isn't your cusp starting to present.
41:01Okay, what is this cusp thing?
41:04Oh, you were born during a transitional sun.
41:06Now you're the Gemini, but you're a little bit of Cancer, too.
41:12Miss Burke was right?
41:13But you've always said I was a Gemini.
41:16June 20th, 11.59pm.
41:18It's on my birth certificate.
41:20I could have sworn I told you about this.
41:23Telling me about what?
41:25How when I was pregnant, your dad had a pool at the office and everybody bet on which day you'd
41:30be born.
41:31Not ringing any bells.
41:32No, you remember.
41:33It's so fun.
41:34We wanted to stay in the good graces of the head of Cedar's plastic surgery division, who had placed a
41:40bed on June 20th.
41:41Which worked out for him because I was born on June 20th.
41:45And for us, look at the fabulous life we lead.
41:48We have a favorite bistro in Paris and a pilot on speed dial.
41:55We use summer as a verb.
41:56Mom, when was I born?
41:57June 21st.
41:58Mom!
41:59At 12.01am.
42:01What is two minutes in the grand scheme of things?
42:03My whole identity.
42:05Okay, technically, your head was out at 11.59.
42:07Great!
42:08Great!
42:09So my head's a Gemini and my body's a Cancer.
42:12This changes my entire emotional narrative.
42:16Did you nominally corroborate the lie I've been living the past 16 years?
42:24No?
42:26Uh, Miles on the phone.
42:27Said it's important.
42:32How does a Cancer cusp even answer the phone?
42:37This was with the receipts?
42:39It was shoved in the binder.
42:40The note said, what a beautiful family.
42:43Well, it did before the sprinklers washed it off.
42:46Okay, so we had a photo of his family?
42:48Yeah, but the note is creepy.
42:49And that's not his wife.
42:50What?
42:50His wife has red hair.
42:52And they don't have kids.
42:55I've seen that jacket before.
42:57I knew it didn't belong to his wife.
42:59He was dismissed from a school in Sunnyside, Washington for unknown reasons.
43:02This girl's wearing a shirt that says Sunnyside.
43:04Seems like she's the unknown reason.
43:08So we're saying this girl is his daughter?
43:12Wow.
43:13I mean, I thought he was having an affair,
43:16but I never thought he'd have a whole secret family.
43:20Maybe he was stealing the money to provide for them.
43:23Yeah, but that still doesn't explain the note.
43:25Unless the money isn't for his family.
43:27It's a pretty big secret.
43:28Almost worth stealing thousands of dollars to cover up.
43:32He was paying someone to keep quiet.
43:35Someone must be blackmailing him.
43:42Guys, I need your help.
43:45It's my mom.
43:51Oh, fuck.
43:59What do they want with your mom?
44:01She swears she didn't do anything.
44:02Why were they there?
44:03This is the police!
44:05Step out of your car with your hands up.
44:08They were there to arrest her.
44:10Look, thousands of dollars in cash was reported stolen from school today.
44:14Look, right near West High.
44:16Written all over them.
44:19Those aren't mine.
44:23We found it in her car.
44:25What?
44:26That's impossible.
44:26Donna would never steal.
44:30Well, she'd never steal that much.
44:32That doesn't make any sense.
44:34Donna wasn't even at the school today.
44:35She was.
44:36Do you remember?
44:36She...
44:37She dropped off my lunch.
44:40Okay, but Donna was the one who told us about the receipt.
44:43And then tried to convince us not to look for them.
44:45Didn't we just realize that someone was blackmailing Anderson?
44:49I'm sorry, what are you talking about?
44:52We think Anderson has a secret family and someone knows about it.
44:59You think my mom is blackmailing him?
45:01No.
45:02No way.
45:03Donna couldn't have done this.
45:11Could she?
45:42Love that you won't come by.
45:47Where you call my name
45:51As you walk on by
45:55Where you call my name
45:59When you walk away
46:40Where you call my name
47:10Where you call my name
47:40Where you call my name
48:10Where you call my name
48:15Where you call my name
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