00:08Hi everybody. Hi folks. Welcome to Beer Me. This is a show where we review beer for you. This is
00:15Dave. This is Trevor. All right we have today for you Coors Light. So this is our first light beer.
00:23I was very adamant against doing this. I wanted that on the table right now. So artwork. Four percent
00:30alcohol by volume. It's a light fucking beer. Okay they call this beer the silver bullet. That's because
00:36of the silver label. I like the red. The red and silver look good. On the label the mountains turn
00:40blue when it's cold enough. This is a beer that you don't want to drink if you want to get
00:45some
00:45drinking done. Prepare to get not even a buzz. No. This is a beer for uh scientists. It's lacking
00:52pizzazz. It's like a shitty office party. Artwork gets a six. I'm giving artwork a six as well.
00:57This category is called taste. Tasting. The blandest beer I've ever had. I'm just gonna say it's so
01:03bland. This is a chess tournament beer. This is a recovering alcoholic's beer. It's like it tastes
01:08like I'm just drinking pool water. I'm really upset right now. I want you to know that. I taste
01:12nothing guys. Drinking a light beer is like beating off and not coming. You're saying I could not get a
01:17dog hard. Do cats have penises? Have you ever seen a cat's dick? No. Google cat dick. Oh my god.
01:25It does
01:25look like a dog's dick. Oh my god that's like that should never be seen. What about cat's balls? Yeah
01:30cat's dicks are weird and this has nothing to do with Coors Light. No it does. This sucks. I'm giving
01:35taste a one. I gave it a one as well. Let's see how smooth this pool water is. This beer
01:42is actually
01:42really fucking smooth. Yeah it's tasteless. It's light and tasteless so of course it's gonna be smooth. It has to
01:47be
01:48smooth. It's four fucking percent. It's not gonna be not smooth. It's like it's like it's kind of like a
01:52given. I'm sorry I don't even like to do this but smooth this gets a 10 out of 10 for
01:56me. I'm giving it a
01:589 out of 10. Downability great Coors Light. Let me just drink a glass of water really quick. Cold certified
02:05carbonated water. Here's the sobriety. Here's the sobriety.
02:36The carbonation kickback is brutal. It's like that childhood experiment of baking soda and vinegar. Pop rocks.
02:42Oh what? If you saw a guy fucking shotgun a Coors Light at a party you'd punch him out. Yeah
02:49you'd slit his throat and bathe in his blood.
02:51What a waste of fucking time. Fuck this. I'm giving downability a one. I'm giving it a five. This is
02:57reliability.
02:57Reliability. Fuck this beer. It is not reliable. You cannot count on it or shit. In terms of what though?
03:03Reliable because you're not getting drunk or
03:04reliable because you can't drink it throughout the night. Ahhhh. Fuck this beer. Yeah I guess this beer is reliable.
03:11You can
03:11have you could have fucking 24 of these in an hour. These beers aren't even fun to drink. It doesn't
03:17feel like you're having beer. This is your fault. So it's a zero. No reliability is a zero.
03:21Silver bucket of shit. This is final grade. So artwork. We thought it was okay. Silver. Silver is nice. Silver
03:29goes great with everything. There it is. Coors Light. What the fuck?
03:32Taste horse shit. Tastes like tepid fucking pool water. Smoothness. Very smooth because it's fucking 4%.
03:41Downability. If I saw a guy downing Coors Light at a party I would say you're a fucking loser. Reliability.
03:49Yeah you can have a lot of these beers but why?
03:52I'm giving me a fucking D. This beers getting an F. Who does drink Coors Light? Bicyclists? This beer is
03:59fucking pointless. And you know what Coors? You're welcome.
04:04That's double fuck yous with the bottles in his fingers. Thanks for watching our first episode of non-alcoholic beer
04:10meet.
04:10Thanks for watching guys drink soda water. Yeah because this was fucking pointless. Good night.
