- 2 days ago
Mike tries to make bologna with interesting results and then makes his way to Alaska to fix a special toilet....
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00:00My name's Mike Rowe, and this is my job.
00:05I explore the country looking for people who aren't afraid to get dirty.
00:09Oh, what fresh hell is this?
00:12Hard-working men and women who earn an honest living.
00:14Ah, bad crock. Got me right in a bad place.
00:18Doing the kinds of jobs that make civilized life possible for the rest of us.
00:22Now get ready to get dirty.
00:27Coming up on Dirty Jobs.
00:29It cannot have any extender.
00:30In Pennsylvania, the bologna making process is so secretive.
00:34Frank, I'm not exactly sure. What is an extender?
00:36I'm not quite sure.
00:37Seems like very few people know how to do it.
00:39Like a TVP?
00:40Frank, I'm not sure. What is a TVP product?
00:43I'm not quite sure.
00:44But, turns out one of the jobs had a familiar ring to it.
00:48Alright, I'll pull a little meat.
00:50And later...
00:50Basically a crap in a bag.
00:52It goes up in flames.
00:53It does.
00:54On a fishing boat, Dirty Boy shows me a whole new meaning to poop deck.
00:58Guys, I wouldn't touch that.
00:59Full of bad things.
01:00And when the poo burner breaks...
01:02Oh, are you saying there's unburned?
01:04That's how we discovered it was broken.
01:06You can't even fathom what's down the hatch.
01:10Dirty job!
01:12Dirty job!
01:13Getting down to it!
01:14Dirty job!
01:16Ain't nothing to it!
01:18Dirty job!
01:19Someone's gotta do it!
01:21Someone's gotta do them dirty jobs!
01:25About 100 miles west of Philadelphia, you'll find Palmyra, Pennsylvania.
01:30Population?
01:30About 7,000.
01:32In 1902, an ambitious butcher named Harvey Seltzer created a special bologna.
01:37The secret recipe has been handed down through generations.
01:40And today, Seltzer's Smokehouse Meats has become the world's largest producer of smokehouse bologna.
01:46Still produce the old-fashioned way in tall, wooden smokehouses that each hold 12,000 pounds of meat.
01:53You could say this whole operation really is full of bologna.
01:57This is 2,000 pounds of meat.
01:58This is about 200 pounds of meat.
02:00His name's Ron, and that's Frank over there.
02:02How are you guys?
02:03We're super.
02:04Thank you, Mike.
02:05Am I right in at least this guess?
02:07It's 2,000 pounds of lean cow meat.
02:09It's about 90% fat-free.
02:10What is the difference between bologna and bologna?
02:12Bologna is a cooked product.
02:15Lebanon bologna can only contain skeletal meat.
02:17That's where it's skeletal beef.
02:19It cannot have any extenders.
02:21No additives.
02:22Frank, I'm not exactly sure.
02:24What is an extender?
02:25I'm not quite sure.
02:26Like a TVP product or something like that?
02:28Frank, I'm not sure.
02:29What is a TVP product?
02:31TVP.
02:32I'm not sure.
02:32The texture of vegetable protein.
02:34So it's not the steak part of the cow.
02:36No.
02:37Maybe it's legs.
02:38No.
02:38No, we use a four-quarter.
02:40When you get to the hind, it's a little too fatty.
02:42So this is what the four-quarter means.
02:43Just come down through the neck, back through the middle of the cow.
02:46What do we do first in the process of transforming this into your finished bologna product?
02:52Frank and his people, then, we're going to put a thermometer in it to check to make sure
02:56the temperature.
02:57We have certain standards for the meat when it comes in here as to what it looks like
03:01and the temperature and this type of thing.
03:02Sure.
03:03Can I be one of your people, Frank?
03:04You want to be one of your people?
03:04Yeah.
03:05There you go.
03:05If that's...
03:06Go ahead.
03:07Just jam it straight down into it?
03:09Yep.
03:12What temperature are we looking for, Frank?
03:14Anywhere between 32 and 39.
03:18How are we doing?
03:18What's your temperature look like?
03:19Look at that.
03:1938 degrees Fahrenheit.
03:21Record your temperature.
03:22Frank, may I remove your probe from the meat?
03:24You may.
03:24You may.
03:26Don't hurt yourself.
03:27That's scalable.
03:30All right.
03:31Good.
03:31I guess I'm the king of England.
03:32All right.
03:34Customers?
03:34Well, it's early in the morning and people want their bologna, so we should get started.
03:38After a few temperature and quality tests, the meat is transported to a fat removal station.
03:43Oh.
03:45So the meat gets up there by just a basic dumping thing.
03:49This will come up and dump.
03:51And the inspection table.
03:53It's right there, right where John is.
03:55How are you, John?
03:56Mike.
03:56How are you doing?
03:57I'm doing great.
03:58Sounds like one of those cows might still be alive.
04:06So, John.
04:07Yeah?
04:072,000 pounds of meat.
04:09What is your job here exactly?
04:11Cut the fat and the clots out of the meat, put it in the grinder, grind up the meat.
04:16That's the grinder down there?
04:17Yep.
04:17Ron, could you hand me that meat hook?
04:18Down at the end.
04:19Not that I'm going to do anything with it.
04:21Just the opportunity to hold one is something I simply can't pass up.
04:25Don't hurt yourself.
04:25Well, you can pull some meat down.
04:27All right.
04:27I'll pull a little meat.
04:28I'm just looking for...
04:29Now, so the fat you're looking for would be...
04:32I mean, what about that?
04:33Yeah.
04:33That's like a lot of fat, isn't it?
04:38Show me what that is.
04:40Blood clot.
04:41So that's a clot in an artery.
04:43And this whole thing now goes?
04:45Barrelite.
04:46That goes in an edible barrel.
04:49Pure fat.
04:50Yep.
04:50No good.
04:53All the meat processed at Seltzer's goes through a careful excess fat and blood
04:58clot removal process to make sure that no more than 10% fat goes into their bologna.
05:03You're doing all right.
05:07There you go.
05:08Clot.
05:09Clot.
05:12So, I mean, in terms of meat quality, I mean, can you even compare bologna to a hot dog?
05:17Oh, hot dogs are great.
05:18I love them.
05:19Do you?
05:19One of my favorite foods.
05:21Tube steaks.
05:25Now, when you say 95% lead...
05:28Usually 90%.
05:29This is 90% fat free.
05:31Where does it come out when you grind it?
05:33Right here.
05:34Oh.
05:34Oh, that's worth looking at.
05:37So this is a bucket of your ground meat.
05:38Yep.
05:39And that meat gets mixed.
05:41Yes.
05:41All right.
05:42How do we do that?
05:43Okay.
05:44You got to lift the lid.
05:46Scrape your excess off into the bucket.
05:49All right.
05:50Close enough?
05:51Yeah, that's good.
05:52You got to check the weight.
05:53You need 330 pounds.
05:55Take whatever you have over that out and put it back up onto the table until you get to 330.
06:02332.
06:04There you go.
06:05Yep.
06:06330.
06:09Oh, the bottom opens.
06:11Yeah, the bottom opens.
06:11Oh, that's great.
06:12The mixer will blend in all the special ingredients that give seltzers its unique and delicious flavor.
06:18So the grind goes into the mix.
06:21And Bob, you put more stuff in it.
06:24Yes, all the ingredients.
06:25I can do that right now and show you.
06:27Yeah, show me what goes in here.
06:28Okay.
06:29Okay, here's starter culture.
06:30Mix it around now.
06:31Starter culture?
06:32And what's it do?
06:33What's the purpose of it?
06:34What we're looking for is to reduce the pH to about below 4 to make sure that E. coli or
06:39semi oil listeria are not going to be in there.
06:41Fucking sugar.
06:42Uh-huh.
06:43Just put that in there and spread it around.
06:45So we're making sweet meat here?
06:48This is regular bologna.
06:49Regular bologna's got sugar.
06:50It's a lot of sugar, yeah.
06:51All right.
06:52There's dextrose.
06:53That's corn sugar.
06:54Corn sugar.
06:55I hate to tell you what that costs today.
06:56You can tell me.
06:57I mean, how much?
06:59A lot.
07:00Yeah.
07:01Salt.
07:01That whole thing in?
07:02Okay.
07:03Pure.
07:03Spice.
07:04That's one of the proprietary things.
07:06Wow.
07:06Yeah.
07:07Well, that's got a nice smell on it.
07:08I'm honored just to touch it.
07:09You just sprinkle that around also.
07:12Oh, yeah.
07:12Nitrate?
07:13So the myoglobulin doesn't run away from it.
07:16What's that fancy word?
07:17Myoglobulin.
07:18That's the red stuffing meat.
07:25It's bologna.
07:27It's the starter bologna.
07:28What's the finish?
07:30Smokehouse.
07:31Something to look forward to.
07:36Coming up.
07:36All right, you meat princess.
07:38Send me 52 inches of your sweet best.
07:40All right.
07:41In the bologna business, it's all about how you handle your meat.
07:44You have to yank on it hard.
07:46I mean, can you yank the meat too hard?
07:48You've got to be firm.
07:49No, I don't think you can yank it too hard.
07:51But gentle.
07:52Pull it up like a pantyhose?
07:53Yeah, there you go.
07:54I have not pulled up a lot of pantyhose.
07:57I hope not.
07:59And later, tackling a toxic turd burner.
08:02I'm pretty sure that's bad.
08:03It's a tricky task.
08:04It really sucks.
08:06That's pure fugu.
08:16So this is Brooke, and she's handling the sweet meat here on a hand truck.
08:21Normally, of course, I'd be operating the machinery, but Brooke has explained that I'm
08:25not qualified to do this, and I haven't been certified.
08:28You did a great job there, Brooke, bringing it in there like that.
08:31I assume this is where you wanted to end up?
08:33No, on there.
08:34Oh, well, then I think you've got to go a little further.
08:36Yeah.
08:37Can you please move?
08:38Yeah, I'll get out of your way.
08:39Okay.
08:39Brooke's no nonsense when it comes to the hand truck.
08:42She doesn't take a lot of crap, and she knows her business on it.
08:46How long did it take you to get certified on this?
08:48About two days.
08:49Two days.
08:50See, we don't have that kind of time, and when the meat is sweet, obviously, you don't
08:55want to linger, and there it is.
08:59Brooke, how much weight would you say we got here?
09:02About 1,500 to 1,700 pounds.
09:04So a little shy of a ton.
09:06Yeah.
09:06A ton of sweet meat.
09:07Now we dump it.
09:08We dump it?
09:09Yep.
09:10So here comes 1,500 pounds of sweet meat.
09:16You can smell the sweetness in the air or something.
09:19Then we come over here, and we've got to start running this.
09:22This is our control panel to make the grinder run.
09:25The flavored meat is ground again to the desired consistency for the style of bologna
09:30to be packaged.
09:31I am doing 52 long and seltzer regular meat.
09:3652 inches?
09:37Yes.
09:38So well over a yard.
09:40Yes.
09:40Of meat.
09:42Right.
09:42I've seen this process before with smaller, you know, casings.
09:46I just can never get enough of it.
09:50The pusher pushes it down.
09:53Well this is, I hate to say it, but they almost don't need you.
09:57I need another casey.
09:58But you need me, don't you?
09:59Now what are these, is this just plastic?
10:01Yes.
10:02Okay.
10:02That would take a lot of intestine.
10:04Right.
10:06Put it on the horn, and it goes.
10:10Regular seltzer meat in a 52-inch tube.
10:13Right.
10:13May I?
10:14Sure.
10:15How long have you been here, Kay?
10:1623 years.
10:17Is that right?
10:18Yes.
10:18You love it?
10:19Yes.
10:19That's great.
10:22And off it goes.
10:24Beats the old days, huh?
10:25How'd they do this 23 years ago?
10:26You stuffed them by hand.
10:30Yes.
10:30Does your mind wander at night, and you're nodding off, thinking, how much meat have I handled?
10:35Yeah, a lot.
10:37A lot of meat.
10:37A lot.
10:37My mind wanders sometimes, and I can't fall asleep.
10:40I'll look back and ask myself questions like that.
10:43You leave a little bit extra on the end?
10:44A little bit extra.
10:46Yep.
10:48Okay.
10:49What's he do with them down there?
10:51He double clips them in the stockinette, get ready for the smokehouse.
10:56So they go straight in the smokehouse after this?
10:58Right.
10:59Do you prefer the sweet meat, or the regular meat?
11:01I like the sweet.
11:02Who's this fella?
11:03That is a little Amish man.
11:05Does he have a name?
11:06Oh, we should name him.
11:08Woody.
11:09Woody?
11:09Because of the smokehouse.
11:11What do you think the red cheeks symbolize?
11:14Amish.
11:17Could be.
11:17I don't know.
11:19What's this fella's name?
11:20Mike.
11:21Mike?
11:21Yeah.
11:21I'm going to go chat with him.
11:23Mike.
11:24Yes.
11:25Mike.
11:25Oh, hi, Mike.
11:26How are you?
11:27I'm doing good.
11:28Just thought I'd swing down here to see what a moment or two in your life was all about.
11:32Okay.
11:33What's happening?
11:35Well, I'm pulling this stockinette tight like this here, sticking it under the clipper,
11:40and then it's clipping the stockinette.
11:42Right.
11:43Because they have to hang them out of the smokehouse.
11:45This is what they hang by, obviously, right?
11:47Yes.
11:48Is this something I could try?
11:50Sure.
11:50You just have to pull this tight.
11:52Yeah.
11:53Put it underneath there.
11:56Pull it tight.
11:57That goes there.
11:58Right.
11:59That goes there.
12:01Ingenious.
12:03Am I pulling it tight enough?
12:05A little tighter.
12:07Tighter on the...oh, like that.
12:09Yeah.
12:09Yank on it, though.
12:11Yeah.
12:11So we're preparing for 52s right now.
12:14That means a bigger stocking.
12:17That means a bigger casing.
12:20Basically, it's just more meat.
12:22Right.
12:22More meat.
12:23All right, you meat princess.
12:25Send me 52 inches of your sweet best.
12:28All right.
12:29Here it comes.
12:30Here we go.
12:30Do the meat.
12:36So much meat.
12:41Yeah, you have to yank on it hard.
12:43Harder than the nines.
12:45Right.
12:45Right.
12:46I mean, can you yank the meat too hard?
12:48No, I don't think you can yank it too hard.
12:51That's good to know.
12:53Okay, what are you laughing at?
13:00Come on, meat.
13:01Pulled it up like a pantyhose?
13:03Yeah, there you go.
13:04I have not.
13:06There you go.
13:07Pulled up a lot of pantyhose.
13:09I hope not.
13:11All right.
13:12There you go.
13:14Kay and Mike and Brooke, I want to thank all three of you.
13:17Yeah, you're welcome.
13:18And we want to thank you.
13:19The opportunity to come here and yank this amount of meat in the middle of the week,
13:23it's a treat for me.
13:25Okay.
13:26All right.
13:26Thank you, Mike.
13:28Brooke, thanks.
13:29Kay.
13:30Yep.
13:31Uh-huh.
13:31I'll lose my number.
13:32Okay.
13:33Okay.
13:36Coming up.
13:37Oh, yeah.
13:38Oh, it's gonna smoke.
13:39If you can't take the heat.
13:40Should we just drop the meat from a one-story height?
13:42You can't have no broken ones.
13:44Stay out of the smokehouse.
13:45Oh, damn it.
13:46What's the retail value on this?
13:48$50.
13:48I mean, I can pay for maybe a quarter of this if you have some sort of installment plan.
13:54And later.
13:54This is just above and beyond.
13:56Except for the backsplash.
13:58It's not any fun in the mouth.
14:00There's a lot of pride in this job.
14:01Well, look at that.
14:02Get it off that thing.
14:13Once the raw meat is packed into a casing, it's wheeled right around the corner to one
14:17of ten smokehouses.
14:19Is that close enough?
14:20That's good.
14:21You're red?
14:21Yep.
14:22Mike?
14:23How you doing?
14:23Great.
14:25All right.
14:26Raw.
14:26Raw, got it.
14:27And raw because this is raw.
14:29Yep.
14:29That's all there is to it.
14:31Doesn't stand for anything?
14:32Nope.
14:33How many different colors are blue?
14:35Dark blue and red out here.
14:37So, good.
14:38So, first of all, this is a smoker.
14:40Yep.
14:41And obviously, it's full of smoke and dirt.
14:43What is this?
14:44From the smoke building up over the years.
14:47And under here, I guess, would be a fire.
14:48Yep.
14:49And we're going to hang our meat from the rafters.
14:51Yep.
14:52And these will hang for...
14:53Two days.
14:54For two days.
14:54And get smoky.
14:55Show me what you do.
14:56Just pull them up like this.
14:59And it's hanging right on the nail.
15:01All right.
15:02Just hanging on there.
15:03Hey, it's a tricky thing.
15:04It is a tricky thing.
15:05I'm not used to handling this amount of meat.
15:07So, there's no fire in here now, obviously.
15:09I'd be up in flames, of course.
15:12How much meat would you say you've hung over the years, Red?
15:1514 years worth.
15:1614 years of meat.
15:18That's a lot of meat.
15:19A lot of hung meat.
15:23Everybody here seems to have been here for a long time.
15:25I mean, it's a good place to work?
15:26Yeah.
15:27You like putting up with the weather.
15:29What's the worst part of the weather?
15:31The wintertime.
15:3110, 15 degrees outside.
15:33Well, it must be nice working in a smoker when it's 10 degrees now.
15:35Yeah.
15:36Of course, in August, 100 degrees outside.
15:38Yes.
15:40Well, they've been doing this, you know, pretty much forever, right?
15:42Yeah, about 100 years.
15:44I know this company's been around forever, but I mean, you know, cooking meat or curing
15:47meat in a smokehouse, that's kind of ancient, right?
15:50Yeah.
15:51This is the last place.
15:52In the U.S., I guess it does it like this.
15:54Is that right?
15:55Yeah.
15:55Oh, that's cool.
15:59This place is like some very intimidating locker room.
16:03We do about a thousand of these a day.
16:04You're kidding me.
16:05Nope.
16:06It gets tiring.
16:07Yeah, it does.
16:09All right.
16:09That's it.
16:10Let me go back and do it all over again.
16:12All right.
16:13And the next level?
16:14Those are all nine-pounders.
16:15How do you get up there to hang that meat way up there?
16:18Climb up like a monkey.
16:19Great.
16:19I'll look forward to that.
16:21All right, so now what would you do?
16:22You'd have to get the fire going at some point, right?
16:25Yeah.
16:26A piece of wood.
16:28What you're going to do is lay the wood down where you're at on that cardboard.
16:32Mm-hmm.
16:33Throw some rags on top of it.
16:35All right.
16:36Pour some kerosene on that.
16:38The secret ingredient to any good fire.
16:40Yep.
16:42How much?
16:43Uh, that's pretty good.
16:45All right.
16:48Now once that's going good, we normally kick it in with our feet.
16:51You don't want to get too close because the flame comes out.
16:54Yeah.
16:56We'll turn on the water right now.
16:58Pull that down.
16:59Yeah.
17:01That turns the water on.
17:02We can close the shutters now.
17:04We've got to close these windows up top so that keeps all the smoke in.
17:08How do you do that?
17:09You've got to close them on the other side.
17:17Why are they open in the first place?
17:18Uh, when you empty a house, it lets all the hot air out.
17:21It's locked.
17:22You want to do the other one?
17:22Sure.
17:28Yeah, it'll be quick.
17:30Yeah.
17:31There you go.
17:32Okay.
17:33All right.
17:33Just put this back.
17:36Yeah, it's doing good.
17:37Throw some wood in there.
17:39Try to put the...
17:41Bark down?
17:41Bark down.
17:42Yeah.
17:46Oh, yeah.
17:48Oh, that's going to smoke.
17:49Crazy smoke.
17:50In a couple of days, the fermentation process will be complete.
17:54In the meantime, other smoke houses are finished and ready to be opened up and unloaded.
17:59I'm going to do the top one first.
18:10All right.
18:10Now what?
18:11Let me go back downstairs.
18:12All right.
18:13Up and down, loading and unloading.
18:15That's the name of the game.
18:17You've got special trucks, too.
18:19You've got to use finished trucks.
18:20Of course.
18:21No cross-contamination.
18:23Nope.
18:24Just throw it in there.
18:27The smokehouse holds 14,000 pounds of baloney.
18:30About half that weight from the hefty 52 inches.
18:36No.
18:37It's hard to believe a simple nail head hanging system could make an otherwise easy job.
18:41So, utterly miserable.
18:47Okay.
18:47Come on.
18:50Come on.
18:53Okay.
18:55All right.
18:55This one's full.
18:56That's full of meat.
18:57I'm going to push that out, and we'll get another one.
18:59Let's throw it all over again.
19:00I don't know.
19:01All too hard and 28 of them.
19:03How many are in here?
19:0430.
19:07That's depressing.
19:08You just do the math.
19:09I can't.
19:10Card after card of finished meat will be taken to a station where the balona will wait
19:14to be sliced.
19:16And we need another one of these?
19:17Let me get the other one.
19:18Something tells me you got one.
19:21All right, so what's the plan of attack there, Red?
19:23We've got to crawl up there and get some balonies they need down.
19:26And crawling up there, we'd have to move some of these.
19:29Some of these over this way.
19:30Make sure you move them straight.
19:32If you move them crooked, they'll fall down on your head.
19:34That's like the best advice you can give.
19:42Okay.
19:43Now the things we're standing on, of course, can roll.
19:45Yeah.
19:45So it'd be good not to fall.
19:46I've got to yell for Chris.
19:48Chris!
19:48Chris!
19:49So Chris is going to bring a truck over.
19:50We're going to drop the meat straight to Chris.
19:52Is he catching them, or are we just dropping them?
19:53We just dropped them.
19:54Oh, I love it.
19:55So we just dropped the meat from a one-story height.
19:56You've got to drop them so they land flat.
19:59You can't go down like this, or like this, or...
20:01Right.
20:02So you can't have no broken ones.
20:04No broken ones.
20:04So let me watch your technique there.
20:05Stand by.
20:06Perfect.
20:11I'm going for pure...
20:13Pure metal.
20:13Pure steel right here.
20:14All right.
20:16Oh, look at that.
20:17Looks like a gymnast.
20:18And the flip is good.
20:22I'm having a hard time with the wall.
20:24Oh!
20:24Damn it!
20:26I'm going to respect your meat.
20:29Oh!
20:30Crap!
20:31What's the retail value on this?
20:32It's about $50.
20:33Three of them have gotten away from me.
20:35We don't know the damage.
20:36But basically, I missed the truck.
20:37It's $50.
20:38You probably have to pay for that, though.
20:39Normally, I would offer to.
20:40Right.
20:40So, I mean, I can pay for maybe...
20:43Maybe a quarter of this.
20:44Maybe if you have some sort of installment plan.
20:48That's right.
20:59Oh!
21:00Look at that.
21:01That's the sound of meat on camera.
21:03Doug, look what your eye did to that piece of meat.
21:05Well, studies show that when meat smashes into Doug's face,
21:09it splits right in half.
21:10$50, Doug.
21:11Two days' pay.
21:12Gone.
21:13All right.
21:14I mean, I get the basic idea.
21:15Yeah.
21:16Now, what's worse?
21:17Unloading them from here or loading them?
21:19Throwing them up is pretty tough, too.
21:21Throwing them up?
21:22Yeah.
21:22That's what we're going to do next.
21:23So, I'm going to learn how to throw up.
21:25Good.
21:26We've got to change shirts again.
21:27Are you kidding me?
21:28There's a lot of changing shirts.
21:29I was just getting used to this shirt.
21:30Coming up.
21:31Oh!
21:33Holy cow!
21:34Oh, here comes a high, hard one.
21:35I never knew playing with your meat could be so much fun.
21:37I've got to figure out if I'm right or left-handed.
21:39Like anything else, it's all in the technique.
21:41I think I'm right-handed.
21:44And later.
21:44We're going in.
21:45Double-team this bad boy.
21:47Tonight's dirty boy and I take on a tricky toilet.
21:49Show this crapper who's boss.
21:51And get the crap kicked out of us.
21:53Whole list of things.
21:54Ah!
22:06So, the cycle here at the smokehouse is fairly simple.
22:08You load them up.
22:09You unload them.
22:10Then you load them up again.
22:11And then you unload them.
22:13Then you load them up.
22:14Then you unload them.
22:15This one's empty, which means we're going to load it.
22:22That's weird.
22:24All right, so you're placed and ready to hang.
22:27Yep.
22:27I'm ready to catch.
22:28Mike, are you ready to throw up?
22:30Yeah.
22:30All right, begin throwing up.
22:32What you want to do is just catch them.
22:33Huh?
22:34And they'll come up like that.
22:36And I want to put this part right here like that, because I've got to hang them like
22:40that.
22:40Gotcha.
22:44You're a good thrower.
22:45Look at that.
22:46It just comes right up here.
22:47It's like a pass.
22:49Like a great pass.
22:50It's almost as though I don't have to do anything at all.
22:53Meat.
22:54You're standing around.
22:55And then there's meat.
22:57Minding your own business.
22:59Meat.
23:01Hanging out.
23:02And there's some meat.
23:03What's coming your way?
23:05Meat.
23:06Gosh, if only I had some meat.
23:09Meat.
23:09My kingdom for a tube of meat.
23:12Has anyone seen the meat?
23:16My favorite byproducts are meat byproducts.
23:20Maybe one day you and I'll meat.
23:23It's what's for dinner.
23:24Meat.
23:26My favorite thing that rhymes with seat would be meat.
23:30My favorite all-time treat, it's meat.
23:33Ask me what to eat, I say meat.
23:37Oh, fancy.
23:38Probably not.
23:39We play games up here.
23:41Well, sure you do to pass the time.
23:44Holy cow.
23:45Oh, here comes a high hard one.
23:46What else you got?
23:48Give me a single end over end.
23:51Nice.
23:52Give me a reverse spiral.
23:53That's good.
23:55Oh.
23:56Oh.
24:01Oh.
24:04Oh.
24:06Oh.
24:06Oh.
24:06Oh.
24:06What do you say me and you mix it up?
24:07All righty.
24:09Oh.
24:12Oh.
24:13Oh.
24:14Oh.
24:14Oh.
24:14Oh.
24:15Oh.
24:16Oh.
24:18Oh.
24:19Oh.
24:20Oh my God.
24:20Like I figured out from right or left hand in to side.
24:23I think I'm right-handed.
24:26So, from a meat point of view, this is what the spiral looks like.
24:31That's what the end over end looks like.
24:35And this is what your knuckleball looks like.
24:47Mike, I appreciate you letting me come down here and try my head and throw it up.
24:52You're welcome.
24:53Red, thank you.
24:55What can I see next?
24:56Go out this door, go left to the double doors, and you'll see somebody out there.
25:01We could probably go to the slicing room.
25:03The slicing room.
25:06I'm looking for the slicing room.
25:07That's me.
25:08How you doing, Chris?
25:08You're Chris.
25:10Man, it's a little cool in here, you know?
25:12You could hang meat in here.
25:15You ready?
25:16So this is 52's.
25:18Right?
25:19You go down, but you're going to do it so you don't cut into the meat.
25:22And then I'm going to toss it on the table here.
25:27Love it.
25:30There you go, that's good.
25:33Go ahead and give it a good toss.
25:35Almost.
25:37And then off.
25:38So you've got to yank the meat, but you don't want to yank the meat too hard.
25:41No.
25:41Grab it up.
25:43Oh, we don't take the whole table?
25:45No.
25:46Okay.
25:48Going out this way.
25:49Yep.
25:51Put this end in first.
25:53All the big ends are that way.
25:55And then what you're going to do is put your finger right in there, and it'll go up.
26:02That's high tech.
26:04Expensive machine.
26:06Half a million dollars.
26:08Great.
26:09Okay, you can load some more in there.
26:15Where's the work actually up?
26:17Over there?
26:17Yes, over there.
26:18What are the girls' names?
26:19Bonnie on the scale.
26:20Uh-huh.
26:21Dixie is the one all the way on that side.
26:24Bonnie and Dixie.
26:25Yep.
26:25You go over there and I'll turn it on for you.
26:27Excellent.
26:27All right.
26:28Great.
26:30The slicing machine cuts perfect lunch meat style portions of bologna ready for packaging.
26:39Hello, ladies.
26:41Hello.
26:42Are you Bonnie or Dixie?
26:44I'm Dixie.
26:45That makes you Bonnie.
26:47Right.
26:48I'm Mike.
26:48I'm Mike.
26:49What are you doing, Dixie?
26:51You're going to pick up these pounds of meat and stick them in the cup.
26:55Nicely.
26:56Nicely.
26:56Nicely.
26:57I'll be nice with the meat.
26:59What are you doing, Bonnie?
27:00I'm catching all the ones that don't weigh.
27:03What's the proper weight?
27:05Twelve ounces.
27:06So you've got a scale.
27:07Yes.
27:08So everything that comes up here is at least twelve ounces.
27:11Yep.
27:12And that's what you're putting in there.
27:13Yes.
27:14Do you want to try it over here by yourself?
27:16Yeah, I'll try it.
27:17Okay.
27:17Hang on.
27:20You'll get a rhythm.
27:21Going to go back and forth from row to row and just stick them in.
27:25Gotcha.
27:30It's an impossible challenge.
27:32They just go too fast.
27:34The bologna waits for no one.
27:35The packaging machine is a ravenous beast that must be fed six to twelve thousand pounds
27:40of bologna every day.
27:43From here, thousands of boxes of seltzer bologna will be shipped every week all over the USA.
27:49Unless, of course, there's unexpected mechanical or human failure.
27:53Done?
27:53Show me full steam.
27:54I'm just costing you money.
27:55I'm slowing you down.
27:56I just have to get caught up here.
27:58There's a lot of pressure.
27:59There's a lot of meat flying around.
28:01Lovely to meet you.
28:02You too.
28:03Nice meeting you.
28:04Nice meeting you.
28:05I'm going to see what else I can find.
28:07Slow and steady wins the race.
28:09Two.
28:09Coming up.
28:10That'll kill you.
28:10A junior bologna maker schools me on dumping toxic waste.
28:14Dumping it in here is okay?
28:16Yeah.
28:17See, that was a bad plan.
28:19And crawling into toxic waste.
28:21The sludge and all of it just goes right in your boots there?
28:24Yep.
28:24You've got to applaud that kind of effort.
28:28And later...
28:29Oh, yeah.
28:30Look at that.
28:30...fixing a turd burner.
28:32Oh, my.
28:33It's almost worse than leaving it broken.
28:35Got to make your breakfast steaks every morning.
28:36I'll let you know.
28:46Well, as near as I can figure, there's only one job here at Seltzer where nobody cares
28:50what color shirt you wear.
28:52And that job goes on in here at this particular time of day.
28:58This will be Chris.
28:59How's it going, Chris?
29:01Pretty good.
29:02Yeah?
29:03Don't take this the wrong way, but if there's a totem pole, you're probably at the bottom of
29:07it, right?
29:08Yep.
29:08Just getting started here?
29:10Yep.
29:11And the official name of this job is what?
29:15Pit cleaner.
29:16If you don't clean, you can't put your wood down.
29:18Can't make the fire.
29:19Can't smoke the baloney.
29:21Nope.
29:21You don't have a hundred-year-old business.
29:23Nope.
29:23I don't want to overstate it, Chris, but the way I see it, this business would be nowhere
29:27without you.
29:28Yeah.
29:31I'll always take the opportunity to hop in a pit with a young enterprising fella who's
29:36working his way up.
29:38In fact, Chris, why don't you get out of here and let me do the work, all right?
29:40All right.
29:41Give yourself a break.
29:41I can't help but notice that area on your lip there where you're eventually going to
29:45have a mustache is now covered with sweat.
29:48So is this just pure ash we're shoveling?
29:51Ash, baloney, wood.
29:52You figure you'll work here for a while?
29:55I don't know.
29:55My dad worked here 31 years.
29:57What's your dad do?
29:58He goes around and checks the fires and pretty much just bosses the smoke guys around.
30:04And the smokehouse workers, they boss you around?
30:07Hmm.
30:08Not too much because they know who my dad is.
30:10So on the one hand, you're the youngest guy here working his way up.
30:13On the other hand, you've got kind of an in with management.
30:15Yep.
30:16See, that's why you look so confident there leaning on your shovel like you're going
30:20to run the joint one day, but you probably are.
30:23Is it important to clean the entire pit?
30:25Pretty much.
30:26So then it does have to be done every week.
30:30It'd be a shame to drop all this back in there, wouldn't it?
30:32Oh, yeah.
30:33Okay.
30:35Hopefully the wheel don't fall off.
30:37That's what I'm hoping.
30:44Then we just pick it up and put it in.
30:47You know how much this weighs?
30:49Nope.
30:50Hopefully I'm not the one that dumps it.
30:51Well, this is a big day for both of us.
30:53Yeah.
30:53Here we go.
30:54One.
30:56Two.
30:57Just don't drop it on your toes.
30:58Don't steal your toes.
30:59Oh, jeez.
31:00All right.
31:00Now in the future, in the area between two and three, there's no talking.
31:04Okay.
31:05I'm going to concentrate between two and three.
31:07It's all about getting up there.
31:08Maybe we want to grab these arms.
31:09The arms?
31:10Yeah.
31:11Then we can get an up higher.
31:13Yeah, but isn't that back going to snap?
31:14No.
31:15Oh, here we go.
31:15Oh, that's a good idea.
31:16Okay.
31:17Let's just put the tip on there.
31:19Oh, it's plastic, isn't it?
31:21No.
31:21Jeez.
31:22Oh.
31:23Uh-oh.
31:23Uh-oh.
31:24Not in the seat here.
31:24We're doing good.
31:25Oh, I see the wheels there.
31:27Hmm.
31:28They're complicated.
31:29Let's try it again.
31:30Ready?
31:30Yep.
31:30All right.
31:31All right.
31:33All right.
31:33All right.
31:33You got it?
31:34Yep.
31:34Stay with it.
31:35Stay with it.
31:36Stay with it.
31:37Very high.
31:41All right.
31:42Now we got to get a broom and shovel and clean that up.
31:44What's that, by the way?
31:45Yeah.
31:45That'd be septic drainage where we catch sort of where the water goes into the well.
31:51Whoa.
31:51To the city's treatment center.
31:53Heck with the ashes.
31:53Tell me more about this.
31:55This is all the bloney juice, wood.
31:58So why does it catch it here?
32:00Don't we want that gone?
32:01No.
32:02That'll kill you.
32:03You know what?
32:04You and the death thing.
32:05The wheelbarrow nearly killed me.
32:07How do you get rid of this stuff?
32:09You pull it out by the handle and you carry it over to the dumpster.
32:12It all just goes in the dumpster?
32:14Mm-hmm.
32:14Where does the dumpster stuff go?
32:16I don't know.
32:17All right.
32:17Let's not worry about that, then.
32:19It's heavy, so watch out.
32:21Oh.
32:23Oh, that's awful.
32:25How are we going to dump this?
32:27The same way?
32:27Just carry it over and pick it up.
32:29All right.
32:29I'm going to follow you.
32:30Get rid of that wheelbarrow thing.
32:42It's bad.
32:43So you guys stop it from going into the borough's water treatment system?
32:47Yep.
32:47Because if we don't, we could be fined.
32:48Right.
32:49But dumping it in here is okay?
32:51Yeah.
32:52All right.
32:52Well, Lebanon Farms.
32:54Mm-hmm.
32:55Coming at you.
32:59Oh, dear.
33:00Ow.
33:02See, that was a bad plan.
33:04The other one over there is just like this one?
33:05Uh-huh.
33:06Great.
33:06Let's go ahead.
33:07It might not be as bad because that's the second one.
33:09It's whatever this one misses.
33:10Oh!
33:12Now we have to get all that stuff off it.
33:14How do you propose we do that?
33:15Just kind of bang it.
33:17Oh, all right.
33:23You got a hose?
33:28In fact, so this is all connected?
33:30Yep.
33:34You may even have trouble getting this one out.
33:39Are you sure it's not sealed in there somehow?
33:42You're not going to get that out, son.
33:44This is sword and stone stuff here.
33:47What the hell are you doing there, Chris?
33:49Trying to get it out.
33:50Oh, you are.
33:52You are an enterprising young man.
33:55The sludge and all of it just goes right in your boots there?
33:57Yep.
33:58Well, you've got to applaud that kind of effort.
34:01I mean, but still, brave.
34:09Huh.
34:10Yeah.
34:11Well, we'll get a metal pipe of pride up.
34:12That's what I'm thinking.
34:13That thing I used to shut the shutters with.
34:15That big piece of steel.
34:19It would be so cool if I could pull it out on my own right now.
34:23Show the little whippersnapper up.
34:33Oh, sorry.
34:33I'm old and stuff, but I've got a lot of pent-up rage.
34:42Now, here we have, Chris, you're actually squeezing the sludge in your fingers.
34:46Uh-huh.
34:46Because that's just how you roll.
34:47See the little piece of wood and...
34:48Yeah.
34:49And all of it.
34:49Oh, yeah.
34:50Yep.
34:56Watching the hose.
34:59Up and...
35:04I don't know how your life is going, son, but in mine, there's always some nasty little surprise at the
35:10end of the day.
35:10It's easier if you just lay it that way and just hose it off, because then it can all run
35:12out.
35:12I was talking to you.
35:14Yeah.
35:14I was making a point now.
35:15Yeah.
35:16You're not interested.
35:17No.
35:17You don't care what I think.
35:19That's, you know, that's fine.
35:22Yep.
35:24Hose are down.
35:25You hose are down.
35:26Hose are down, Chris.
35:28I can't think of a better way to end a long day in a bologna factory.
35:32With me signing off, and Chris doing what he does.
35:36I'm going to check back, Chris, on you in a couple of years, see how your life turned out.
35:40All right?
35:40Yep.
35:41For now, good luck with the hose.
35:47Coming up, the Incinilet is ready for action.
35:50After the dirty boy and I fix the poo incinerator.
35:53Load test.
35:54Load test.
35:55We need someone to put his butt on the line.
35:57Who could we get?
35:58Hmm.
35:59Exactly.
36:09For as long as men have sailed the seas, great writers have immortalized their adventures.
36:15From Odysseus and his epic journey, as told by Homer, to the giant squid of Jules Verne's
36:21overactive imagination, to the albatross in the rhyme of the ancient mariner.
36:25Yesterday, I heard tell of a new legend about a toilet that burns its own poo.
36:30Legend?
36:31Fish story?
36:32Hard to say.
36:33Maybe one day I'll write about it.
36:35But first, I'll have to get to the bottom of it.
36:44So, Tony, back here.
36:45Right here.
36:47Mike.
36:47How you doing, Mike?
36:48I'm all right.
36:49How are you?
36:49Good, good.
36:50There's a rumor going around.
36:52There is.
36:53Yeah, where it is you're burning your poo on board.
36:55That is a requirement, yes.
36:57And during the long days of arduous work, when a man has to have a constitutional, it
37:01goes up in flames.
37:03Yeah, it does.
37:05The Incinolet Model WB.
37:07I'm here because this is broken.
37:09Broken.
37:10So, before you can show me how it works, we have to fix the problem.
37:13Yes, and to fix things, they need to be cleaned up a little bit.
37:16Oh, are you saying there's unburned?
37:18That's how we discovered it was broken.
37:19All my questions are really pointless because the diagrams are really explained to me.
37:25It's just the obvious, of course.
37:25They don't have an illustration of a man with the veins standing out on his head, screaming,
37:29pounding on the wall, saying, for the love of God, please, as the sweat beads runs down
37:34his nose.
37:36There we go.
37:37Basically, you're crapping a bag.
37:39This is a magic sack.
37:40Your poo and the bag are transformed into ashes.
37:44So, cleaning the toilet becomes essentially just like cleaning a wood stove or a fireplace,
37:51except the logs being burned are of an entirely different composition.
37:55No, that is disappointing.
37:58Boom.
37:59Oh, no.
38:00First thing when troubleshooting a turd burner is removing any turds that aren't burned.
38:04That's the ash pan, but those aren't ashes.
38:07Those are not.
38:08No.
38:09That's the ass pan.
38:10God, what are you feeding these guys?
38:15Guys, I wouldn't touch that.
38:18See, that's demotivating right there.
38:21That's part of our problem.
38:22We can call that poo goo.
38:23Could go with diarrhea, but that's just medical.
38:27Doctor?
38:29I did.
38:29Oh, dear.
38:31I don't think there's a screw in that one.
38:33I can tell because I can do this.
38:35The other side could be a little trickier.
38:37Yeah, I'm thinking it will.
38:38We have special tools for that.
38:40Use caution.
38:42Caution's my middle name, baby.
38:46I'd be happy to assist you with that.
38:48Yeah.
38:48If I assist you and you do it for me, that'd be great.
38:52Oh, that's clever.
38:54Oh, look at that.
38:55Pops right off.
38:57Mm.
38:59Ah, dear.
39:07This, my friend, is one blower.
39:09That's a blower in the Incinolette.
39:12Maybe we should clean her up a little bit.
39:20I'm pretty sure that's bad.
39:38Try not to be too heavy on the water.
39:40There are electrical components in there.
39:42Oh.
39:43Poo-colored suds.
39:45You know, that's just such a mixed message.
39:53Whew.
39:54This is just above and beyond.
39:56You got...
40:00Not any fun in the mouth.
40:09Sorry.
40:11Got away from me, man.
40:14Well, look at that.
40:15You can eat off that thing.
40:16Or you can crap in it and set it afire.
40:19What is the optimal poo-burning temperature?
40:21That would be approximately 1,000 degrees.
40:241,000 degrees?
40:25At what temperature, in your experience, do you see, you know, the poo's able to hold a flame?
40:29Right.
40:30I think the flash point of poo is somewhere around 500.
40:33So you're going twice as far as you need to.
40:37How much flame does the average load require?
40:40The average load's quick and easy.
40:42Hour and a half a burn.
40:43Right.
40:43But with eight, ten people.
40:46What are the constant?
40:47You get the idea.
40:47We need, of course, to reconnect our element, the heart of the Insanolet.
40:54I figured that'd be its bowels.
40:56We have a blower.
40:58Nice.
40:58The blower's blowing?
41:00The blower is blowing.
41:01A fire in this hole is better than what's usually found in it.
41:04Oh, yeah.
41:04Look at that.
41:07Oh, my.
41:09That's a whole other...
41:12Got to make your breakfast taste different, won't it?
41:15I'll let you know.
41:16We've ruled out the heater coil and the blower.
41:18And whatever's wrong with the turd burner is still a mystery.
41:21But what's wrong with the air in this room right now is no mystery at all.
41:25This guy stays closed.
41:27Can you see anything?
41:28Nope.
41:29Wait a minute.
41:32I can't work with this poo staring me in the face.
41:35That's dirt there.
41:36Yeah, you keep telling yourself that, brother.
41:37That's dirt.
41:39I'm going in.
41:46Double-team this bad boy.
41:47That's right.
41:48Show this crapper who's boss.
41:50What are the hazards of the Incinolet?
41:53Has anyone looked into it?
41:54I can imagine a guy lights up when he's sitting down there, leafing through some of his favorite
41:58pop-up literature, and then kaplammy.
42:01Perfect.
42:02Yeah, the Incinolet is ready for action.
42:06All right?
42:08Load test.
42:09Load test.
42:11Who could we get to test the Incinolet?
42:17Mmm.
42:19Exactly.
42:21Let's clean this up.
42:23Barsky likes a nice dry seat.
42:29How's it going in there, Dave?
42:31It burns.
42:34I guess it's working.
42:36Depending on what it is, of course.
42:38Who knows?
42:40Knock on the door in five minutes.
42:42If he doesn't come out, go in.
42:43Thanks, Mike.
42:44See you around.
42:44Have a good day.
42:50Getting dirty is harder than it looks.
42:53Actually, that's not true.
42:54Getting dirty is the easy part.
42:55Finding good dirty jobs.
42:57That's tricky.
42:58That's why we ask you for your help every now and then.
43:01If you've got a dirty job, go to discovery.com forward slash dirty jobs.
43:05Tell us all about it.
43:05We'll come out and the whole lot of us will get dirty together.
43:09Trust me.
43:09It'll be great.
43:10But you've got to do it now.
43:11Discovery.com forward slash dirty jobs.
43:13Ugh.
43:14Boy doesn't wear underpants.
43:15It's the middle of summer.
43:16He got no underwear on.
43:16Now he's overtopping me with his camera.
43:18Every time I look up.
43:21Medium Jim and the twins.
43:23Establish that.
43:23So we've got a whole new truck full.
43:24It's my turn to throw up.
43:25We've got a whole new truck.
43:26Now it's my turn to throw up.
43:27It's called a line reading in the business.
43:29One of the most insulting things you can do with what you call talent.
43:33Some of them need it.
43:34Some of them don't.
43:36This is what your knuckleball looks like.
43:39Good.
43:40All right.
43:42Not a bad looking guy.