- 17 hours ago
Taskmaster S21e08 I Dont Got Any H 264
Category
🎥
Short filmTranscript
00:02Don't look away
00:12Don't put that on Kelly
00:16I might just do this all day
00:20This is weird
00:22It's so tight
00:33Hello
00:34Welcome
00:36Welcome to Taskmaster
00:39Knock Knock
00:40Who's there?
00:42Task
00:42Task the way
00:45Aha Aha I like it
00:50Doesn't particularly make sense
00:52And yet the allotted introduction time is filled
00:55And thus my contractual obligation
00:57And my next expensive holiday paid for
01:00See you in Cancun Pablo
01:05No
01:06Please
01:07Welcome our five contestants
01:08Amy Glethill
01:11Armando Enucci
01:14Joanna Payne
01:17Joel Dummy
01:20And Camille Nanjiani
01:24And next to me
01:25A man had told me
01:27That he gets up every morning really early
01:30Because his postman has nice eyes and slinky hips
01:34LAUGHTER
01:35That's...
01:36Hmm
01:37It's a little Alex Hall
01:40CHEERING
01:41Hello, Mr Postman
01:44Thank you for that
01:45Prize task then
01:47What's the category this time?
01:48Well, Greg, this categorisation involves personification for your verification
01:53As they've brought in an ordinary household object with the most personality
01:57Hmm
01:58What exactly is personality?
02:00I don't know, but Greg does
02:02So he'll judge their objects fiercely
02:04And then the winner of the episode will go home with five new inanimate friends
02:07Perfect
02:08Right, good
02:09Camille
02:10What household objects have you brought in with personality?
02:12So an object with the most personality
02:15So a few years ago my friends and I
02:17For New Year's Eve we got an Airbnb
02:18And there was an ice maker there
02:21And I'll tell you his name once we look at him
02:23He... he... his?
02:26Ohhhh
02:27This is Flabbergasted Philip
02:29LAUGHTER
02:31And so just to illustrate how much personality he has
02:34Here is him reacting to the sixth sense
02:37LAUGHTER
02:38You can't believe it
02:40What a twist
02:40Oh, God
02:41Oh, Phil
02:42Flabbergasted Philip did not see it coming
02:44LAUGHTER
02:46Oh, there you go
02:47And one more
02:50This is...
02:51There we go
02:51Reacting to Joel
02:52Pulling an egg out of his crotch
02:55LAUGHTER
02:58This is John from you
02:59I'm a big fan of Flabbergasted Philip
03:01Yeah
03:02And what... I've got in my head
03:04What noise I think Flabbergasted Philip makes
03:06When he's Flabbergasted
03:07Boo!
03:10LAUGHTER
03:10Joel, what have you brought in?
03:11A corkscrew
03:12Right
03:14LAUGHTER
03:16Yeah
03:16That's got so much personality
03:18Well, I didn't expect you just to have brought in
03:20Any old corkscrew
03:21Yeah, but look how...
03:23Because then when you...
03:24Every time you get a bit of wine
03:25You open it up and it goes
03:27Ohhhh, it's wine time
03:30LAUGHTER
03:31I think it goes the other way, didn't it?
03:34And then...
03:35It goes
03:36Ohhhh, it's wine time
03:38And he goes
03:39Now
03:41LAUGHTER
03:42APPLAUSE
03:43Good
03:44Good
03:44Good
03:46Good
03:46Good
03:46Amanda, have you brought in something better than a corkscrew?
03:50I love this task outside because it made me just look at everything
03:53And in the office, the hole puncher next to the printer
03:57Does look like someone's dropped a safe onto a duck
04:01LAUGHTER
04:02This is his actual house
04:04Go!
04:06LAUGHTER
04:09Oh, and the gut's definitely dead
04:12Oh!
04:13It's dead
04:14Awww
04:15Strong
04:16Visual
04:17And strong
04:18Amy
04:19I've brought in lovely Linda
04:21A pregnancy pillow
04:24There she is
04:25Ooh!
04:27LAUGHTER
04:27Oh!
04:29And you get in there, you sort of, you can hold it
04:33And she holds you back and you're never sad ever again
04:36Can I tell you something?
04:37Yeah
04:37I have got one of these
04:38Yes!
04:40Yes!
04:40And I didn't know it was a pregnancy pillow
04:42LAUGHTER
04:43I just thought, oh, this looks like a comfy thing
04:46It's brilliant
04:47My ex-boyfriend bought me this pregnancy pillow
04:50And then he never had to hug me again
04:53LAUGHTER
04:56What have you brought in?
04:57I've brought in my gnome pig
04:59Gnome pig!
05:01Gnome pig!
05:04Gnome pig!
05:06Oh, my God
05:07Oh, I hate him
05:09You're not the only one
05:11I first found him 25 years ago
05:14Until he nearly ended my marriage
05:16Because I found him in a garden centre
05:18And he's about that tall
05:20Oh, my God
05:20Where do you ever see a gnome sitting on a pig?
05:23It's incredible
05:24Wow
05:25Oh, he's sitting on the pig
05:27He's sitting on the pig
05:28And my husband was adamant
05:30That we weren't going to put him in the garden
05:32And said he hopes that somebody wins
05:34And finally he can be away from our life
05:37But I don't
05:38And I wish I hadn't said that now
05:39Because I want more than one point for him
05:41Yeah
05:42LAUGHTER
05:42So the category is
05:45An ordinary household object with the most personality
05:48I think because Joel did such a lovely job
05:50Of giving his courtroom personality
05:52I'm going to give him two points
05:53Two to Joel
05:54Two to Joel
05:54Squash duck, lovely Linda
05:56Three points
05:57So three to Armando, three to eight
05:58Yes
05:58OK
05:59And, erm...
06:01Four points to...
06:02Gnome pig
06:03Ah
06:04And it would have been five points
06:05If gnome pig didn't disgust me so much
06:08Flabbergasted Philip
06:09Except I feel like he's become a friend
06:11I love that guy
06:12Boo!
06:13There we go
06:14Five, five, five, five!
06:17CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
06:19Right, let's move on
06:20What's next?
06:21A bit of boulderisation
06:23A soupçon of suppression
06:24And a whoops
06:26Of profanities
06:43Hey, man
06:44Joel Domit
06:45I fancy seeing you here
06:47Yeah
06:47Well, I just want to say
06:49I think you are a complete
06:51BEEP
06:52BEEP
06:54OK
06:54Thank you very much
06:55Chair
06:56I think you're an absolute
06:57BEEP
06:58BEEP
06:59Just for the record
07:00I think you're a massive
07:01BEEP
07:04What does that mean?
07:06It's a compliment
07:07I think you are an absolute
07:09BEEP
07:11Thank you
07:12What do you think of me?
07:12I think you're BEEP
07:14I think you're BEEP
07:15I think you're BEEP
07:15And BEEP
07:17BEEP
07:18OK
07:19I think you're a twat
07:22OK
07:31Alright, so where
07:34Is the
07:35Mass of BEEP
07:38It's been so nice to you
07:40You have actually, yeah
07:41Do you know what I mean?
07:45Oh, what's this?
07:46Hang on
07:47Oh, no
07:47It's just a fire safety notice
07:49Erm
07:50So where is it?
07:52Well, it's very close to you
07:54Am I hot?
07:55Yes
07:55OK
07:56Is it up there?
07:57No
07:57No
07:59Is it?
07:59Oh, for fuck's sake
08:02Honestly
08:08What happened there?
08:09Oh!
08:11Something yourself something
08:13Blank yourself blank
08:15Most blank
08:16Necessary blank
08:17When do you have blank minutes?
08:19It can't
08:20I mean it can't be
08:21It can't be finger yourself silly
08:23That would be outrageous
08:25You just take the paper
08:26You just take the paper
08:27You do whatever you want, Camille
08:31Censor yourself
08:33Censor yourself
08:34Unnecessarily
08:36I'm genuinely intrigued now
08:38I've sort of forgotten about the game
08:39Not a game
08:40It's not a game
08:41It's not a game
08:41It's a task
08:42Most intriguing
08:45Unnecessary
08:45Censorship
08:48Wins
08:48You have
08:49You have
08:5020 minutes
08:51Your time starts now
08:53Taskmaster
08:55So things that you're censored for
08:57Are
08:59Language
09:00Nudity
09:01Political views
09:06And this is where her career ended
09:09When she was naked shouting hate speech
09:17Of all the things we just heard
09:19What is the phrase I'm thinking of?
09:22Yeah, it's finger yourself silly
09:23I don't know why that was the first thing that came to mind
09:27I don't really think that you would have asked that of us
09:32What I liked Alice, you weren't making a joke
09:35You were really just working through it
09:36I don't think it could be finger yourself silly
09:40I'm actually thinking that Joel was the only one you insulted there
09:44I wouldn't have just insulted Joel
09:46I wouldn't have thought that would have singled him out in this series
09:49But I did call Joel a twat and that's
09:53I just felt safe
09:56But you became an entire shade of red I'd never seen before
10:00Yeah, it was awful
10:00He genuinely doesn't like saying bad things about people though
10:03You know the worst thing I've ever heard him say?
10:06Well, they are difficult to like
10:10OK, let's go
10:11Good news kids
10:12It's story time with Miss Gledhill first of all
10:16This is a story called Alex and his massive
10:20Once upon a time there was a boy called Alex
10:23Who was known across the land for having a ginormous
10:27He'd brag about it to make appetites wet
10:30One woman said she'd love to
10:34And share it with her twin sister
10:37Alex proposed
10:38On their wedding night he popped it on the table with one hand
10:43And asked her to
10:44She tried
10:45But it was so big it made her eyes water
10:50Alex waited till she was asleep and br***ed off himself
10:54F***ing so loudly that the wife ran in alarmed
10:59She saw it had softened
11:02Her eyes didn't water anymore
11:05She really loved it
11:08She really loved it
11:13This is a story called Alex and his massive onion
11:19Once upon a time there was a boy called Alex who was known across the land for having a ginormous
11:24onion
11:25He'd brag about it to make appetites wet
11:29One woman said she'd love to cook it right up and share it with her twin sister
11:35Alex proposed
11:37On their wedding night he popped it on the table with one hand and asked her to chop it
11:42She tried
11:44But it was so big it made her eyes water
11:48Alex waited till she was asleep and browned it off himself
11:52Frying so loudly that the wife ran in alarmed
11:57She saw it had softened
12:00Her eyes didn't water anymore
12:03She really loved it
12:13I knew I recognised your voice
12:15I wasted a fortune on those phone lines in the 90s
12:20Round it off yourself
12:24Shall we have a brief interval?
12:25I think we should
12:25Alright then it's time for a brief interval
12:27Off you go
12:28Alex good luck
12:29Yes!
12:32We let him bring his guinea pig in today
12:34It's dead but he hasn't noticed
12:37We'll see you in a bit
12:49Hello!
12:51Welcome back to the start of part two where I cast are busy censoring things unnecessarily
12:57But what's the key criteria I need to judge them on Alex?
13:01It's the most
13:02Whoops!
13:03Whoops!
13:04Whoops!
13:05Next up he's the creative mastermind of a lot of the greatest comedy to come out of the UK in
13:11the last 30 years
13:11So this is bound to be something rather special
13:18Armando Iannucci's unnecessary censorship
13:22Right here we go
13:23Right so you know what you're doing immediately do you?
13:25I think so
13:25Don't you?
13:28That's me
13:29Bit of hair there
13:31Eyes
13:33Right
13:35Bit of pixelating
13:40Right so here we go
13:41Censorship
13:42Right ready?
13:45I
13:45Old MacDonald had a farm
13:47E
13:48E
13:49E
13:49E
13:50E
13:51E
13:51E
13:51E
13:52E
13:52E
13:52E
13:54E
13:55E
13:55E
13:56E
13:56E
13:56E
13:57E
13:57E
13:57E
13:57E
13:57E
13:58E
13:58E
13:58E
13:58E
13:59E
13:59With a
14:01wkwkwkkwkwkkkwkkkkwkk
14:02and a
14:05rkwkkkwkkwkk here
14:06here a
14:08er
14:08er
14:09er
14:09everywhere a
14:11aws
14:12fkkkkwkkwkk
14:13old MacDonald had a farm
14:15Yeah
14:15E
14:16I
14:19o
14:22E
14:23E
14:24That's not like
14:25No
14:25me
14:25M
14:26e
14:26E
14:27Oh, is there a time limit? Am I done, or did I do more?
14:33I feel like you might have done enough. OK.
14:41During your break, I said to them,
14:42I think I might look like I'm having a nervous break.
14:46LAUGHTER
14:47I have a question. Yes.
14:48Why did it say, help me?
14:51LAUGHTER
14:52Well, I think that's rather evident.
14:54LAUGHTER
14:57I just felt like writing this.
15:00It's absolutely fascinating.
15:02It all happened very quickly, didn't it, Amanda? It did, yeah.
15:04You rushed in, you did that. Yeah.
15:06And then rushed out again.
15:07Did you find me in the end? I think I just wandered off into a park.
15:12LAUGHTER
15:13You were still doing it in the park, yeah.
15:16Yeah, in his duck pond there,
15:17and I threw a safe onto one of the ducks.
15:19LAUGHTER
15:21Well, who's next?
15:23Let's try and find something that's, you know, less frightening.
15:25Well, Greg, we're actually going to see
15:26all three of the remaining attempts at unnecessary censorship
15:29with Joanna, Joel and Kamel.
15:32It's really hot today, isn't it?
15:34Yeah, yeah, it's warm.
15:35Oh, my God, it's balmy.
15:37And the air conditioner's not working?
15:39We don't have A.C. here. I'm so sorry.
15:40Oh, my God.
15:41You're not used to this?
15:42Oh, my God.
15:44No, not this kind of heat.
15:45This is too much.
15:48I feel like I'm going to overheat.
15:50Hey, do you have any scissors?
15:52Oh, thank you.
15:53Don't run with them.
15:55I'm not going to run with them.
15:57I'm not going to run.
15:57It's too hot.
16:14Oh!
16:17Oh!
16:20Oh!
16:23Oh!
16:24Oh!
16:25Oh!
16:25Oh!
16:25Oh!
16:25Oh!
16:26Oh!
16:27Oh!
16:29Oh
16:47Hey guys, hey, sorry, we're doing a television show and if if you sign this we can unblur your face
16:53Okay, is that all right? Yeah, okay. Should I sign for him? Yeah?
16:57Yes, okay legal guardian. I suppose all that stuff. It's a lovely view, isn't it? Yeah
17:05Beautiful, thank you so much. Thank you
17:21Hit this spot
17:27Oh, it's breezy now, isn't it?
17:30lovely
17:35Oh, what's going on with the...
17:37Oh, um, I
17:40Was born without nipples
17:42All the men in my family are born without nipples. You know what they called me in school. No nipple
17:47Nanjiani
17:48Mm-hmm. There's nothing there. It's just you you should ask. Oh, sorry touch
18:03Unnecessary because male nipples don't need to be censored anyway. Plus. I don't I don't got any oh my god
18:10This is all freaked me out so much. I've almost forgotten that Joanna seemed to be ramming things into her
18:16backside
18:20Ostensibly Joel's VT showed him revealing his penis to a child
18:27I'm feeling a bit better. Yeah, I wouldn't get to come
18:33What was it censor yourself unnecessarily most unnecessary censorship women?
18:38Unnecessary most unnecessary
18:40I'm giving Amy five points because there's no need to censor any of that since a lovely story about an
18:44onion
18:44There were things in all of the others that should have been censored. So I'm giving everybody else four points,
18:49right?
18:49Whoa
18:55What are the scores right now Alex? Right, it's close this time Amy and Joanna in joint second on eight
19:01points
19:01Kamel's in the lead with nine points
19:07Let's have another one, please. Well, I have a lovely one right here with bells on
19:29Oh
19:34Wow
19:35Wow
19:39Are you gonna fire me out of a cannon or what's not sure yet
19:47You look good. Thank you very much safety first. Hello Joanna. Hello. You look like a safety conscious tourist
20:00Welcome out Alex
20:05You're covered in bells. Oh, yeah, like a sort of modern jester is it very much so would it be
20:12inappropriate to call you a bell
20:13Open up the talk
20:18Take the most photos featuring at least 50% of the taskmasters assistant
20:24That's you the taskmasters assistant must stay within the arena and will run when you clap
20:31Mm-hmm. The arena is the courtyard
20:33You must wear your blindfold correctly at all times and must not run. Oh, I see. I'm gonna hear you
20:43You have 10 minutes and a maximum of 24 pictures your time starts when you have donned your blindfold
20:50Right, so I've got to capture you using these things taking pictures with my ears
20:54I think this will be the hard bit keep putting this on
20:58When that's on I'll start the clock right there. We go 24 pictures 10 minutes. Don't waste your pictures. There
21:03we go
21:04Oh
21:05Was it as painful as it sounded what sorry was it painful? I'm also hard of hearing. That's the other
21:11problem
21:12Ah, right. It's okay
21:16You should think about the things that the bricks of Hampton Court have witnessed over the years. This feels like
21:22a real comedown doesn't it?
21:25Hard of hearing man with boggly eyes a grown woman saying so I've got to take pictures with my ears
21:32But I am very much looking forward to it. Well, first to clap and snap
21:36It's comedian Amy Gladhill and TV presenter Joel Edmonds
21:40Have you got your blindfold on? Yes
21:44Okay
21:4624 pictures all right and the time has started
21:51Hello
21:53Okay, I guess that means the time started okay, so if I
22:14Follow me I can hear you little bells tinkling
22:17Where are you?
22:21Ah!
22:23The bells are close!
22:25Ah!
22:27Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh
22:30Ah!
22:36Ah!
22:53The bells have stopped!
22:55You've taken the top off
23:10Oh
23:12Yes, so close you creepy creepy bail man
23:22What part of the body is that?
23:24Well, I'm sort of content
23:26It's what?
23:27Nothing
23:33That's confusing
23:38Ten seconds
23:40Ten seconds
23:40Ten seconds
23:48Where do you think you are?
23:50I don't know
23:50Oh, I didn't think I was here
23:56Well, sort of as I imagined really
23:58Not a lot of dignity there
23:59But good, I thought
24:01It's really scary
24:03Because she blindfolded
24:04And it's cobbly
24:05And there's a creepy creepy bell man
24:07Running around
24:07I was very much like
24:09Creepy creepy bell man
24:10To catch on
24:13Joe, at one point
24:14Alex was lying on the floor
24:15And you felt
24:16His heel
24:18Up to his sock
24:19All the way up his leg
24:20And then he spoke to you
24:22And you still couldn't work out
24:23What position he was in
24:24Yeah, it was difficult
24:26I think I became mesmerised
24:27By his thighs
24:29It happens
24:31Okay
24:31This is the end of part two
24:33Whether you like it or not
24:46Hello
24:46Welcome back to part three
24:48Where this idiot's been prancing about
24:50In the extreme heat
24:51Covered in bells
24:51Yes
24:53They have to take the most photos
24:54Featuring at least 50% of me
24:56And can take a maximum of 24 pictures
24:59Also, I must run
25:00When they clap
25:01And I'm pretty sure
25:02That's the only bit
25:03Kamel heard
25:03So here he is now
25:05As well as Armando
25:06And Joanna
25:16Alex?
25:18Alex, are you there?
25:20Can we call a timeout
25:21I have something very important
25:22To ask you
25:25Alex?
25:26I have a medical emergency
25:35Alex, I have a medical emergency
25:37Talk to me
25:37What is the problem?
25:40Right
25:54I just realized
25:55It's really hot
25:57And if I clap
25:58You have to run
26:10Are you enjoying running?
26:11No
26:12I don't like
26:14To make you run
26:15You might get tired
26:16And then stay still
26:25How many photos do you think
26:26You've taken, Jo?
26:27I think I've taken loads
26:29So
26:30You can enjoy
26:31Your last 10 seconds
26:32Go, Alex, go
26:34I've probably used them up
26:36So I'm just going to keep tapping
26:37Oh, really?
26:47Are you tired?
26:49Yes, I'm really tired
26:51Whoa
26:53Sweat and paint
26:54Are you alright?
26:55No
26:56Cup of tea
26:57Cup of tea, yeah
26:57Yeah
26:57Yeah
27:04As far as I can work out
27:05Camille and Joanna
27:06Just mainly used this task
27:09As an excuse
27:10To make him run around
27:11I enjoyed it
27:12Oh, yeah
27:12We could tell
27:13Because you were hooting
27:14Like a mad woman
27:16How did Amanda do?
27:17Was Amanda the most accurate?
27:19Amanda did do very well
27:20But Camille was the only one
27:21Who had a proper tactic
27:22Which was to stand as far away
27:23From the noise as possible
27:24When you're more likely to get more of me
27:26In the field of vision
27:27Because I realised early on
27:29Because I realised early on
27:29That he was ducking
27:29Did you realise that, Choke?
27:32LAUGHTER
27:33I think that's the difference
27:34Between me and Camille
27:35Because, you know, he's an incredible actor
27:36And he knows the depth of field
27:39Yeah
27:39And I'm going like, ooh, bells
27:42LAUGHTER
27:43Joanna's tactic was to take 87 pictures
27:46Eighty-seven?
27:47And we could only use the first 24 of them
27:49Which weren't your best
27:50Oh, my God
27:51I can show you what they did if you want
27:52Yes, show me
27:53So the most photos of 50% of me
27:56Was taken by Camille
27:57Who took 12
27:58Wow
27:58Oh
27:59Amy and Armando
28:00Both got 10 photos of me
28:02Joanna, 6 photos of me
28:04Joel, just 3 out of 24
28:07What?
28:09Oh, I'm shocked
28:10Because I was like, I'm okay
28:11Tanking this one
28:12Just to make you miserable
28:13And I won!
28:16Five points
28:17Well done
28:19So, that means
28:21Joel got one point
28:21Joanna, two points
28:22Joined second
28:23Amy and Armando
28:23Get four points
28:24But the winner is Camille
28:25With five points
28:25CHEERING
28:27Lovely
28:28Let's have one more task, please
28:30Oh, yes
28:31And just like when Greg goes for a run
28:33This one involves a lot of staring
28:35LAUGHTER
28:39MUSIC PLAYS
28:50Hello
28:51Ooh
28:52Joel
28:52How's it going?
28:54Yeah, good
28:54Shall I open this or
28:56Yes
28:56Are you going to banter?
28:58No, I just want to watch you put your glasses on
29:01Do not look away from this task
29:03Put nine nuts and or nails in the nappy
29:07Put pine nuts and stroke or nails
29:11Do you want to try to read that one again?
29:13Put pine nuts and stroke or nails in the nappy
29:18Definitely
29:18Put pine nuts
29:20That's the bit I'm worried about
29:21Oh!
29:23LAUGHTER
29:28I read it so many times
29:30I read it so many times
29:32Every time you look away
29:34One minute will be added to your time
29:37We have a maximum of 19 minutes
29:40Fastest wins
29:41Your time starts now
29:43I did not really get a
29:46Oh, you just looked away from the task
29:49Put nine nuts
29:51LAUGHTER
29:54The nine nuts
29:56Is...
29:57LAUGHTER
30:00LAUGHTER
30:00I did not really
30:03I'm sorry
30:05APPLAUSE
30:07I'm not sure we should bother saying the task
30:09I think we've had our fun with this, haven't we?
30:12LAUGHTER
30:13It's no secret
30:14I'm losing this whole show
30:16LAUGHTER
30:17I find reading the task the hard bit
30:19LAUGHTER
30:23It's not looking great for me
30:24The only saving grace is I've got a fucking egg in my pocket
30:28LAUGHTER
30:31APPLAUSE
30:31Let's do it, man
30:32Two people up first
30:33It's Joe
30:34It's Kamel
30:35It's Joe and Kamel
30:37OK, so...
30:38One minute will be added to my time
30:40I'm going to do a quick one
30:41I'm going to give it a quick one
30:42To look around
30:42Right, there's the nappy
30:43Right, we're in nuts
30:51You definitely just looked...
30:53I did?
30:54Yes, you did
30:58Why was I still surprised?
31:05In the nappy...
31:07LAUGHTER
31:13You just looked away from the task
31:15No, I didn't
31:15That time I did not
31:18What are they?
31:19I think that's a party popper
31:20I'm going to do it at the floor
31:21Whoa!
31:23Um, I saw there was a hammer in here
31:27Urgh!
31:29That's just a hammer
31:31Oh...
31:32Ooh...
31:32Nine nuts
31:33There's a nut in there
31:36OK, that's a nut
31:37Hey, we've got a nut
31:39Is that a nut?
31:40It is a nut
31:42It's so unpleasant
31:45But nine nuts
31:46God, that is a lot, isn't it?
31:48What is that?
31:50Oh, it's a nut
31:51Ooh!
31:53Nut?
31:54No, that was a tiny rubber ducky
31:56And you know it
31:57It is
31:59An egg
32:05Nuts
32:05It's two nuts
32:07Right
32:08It's a nail
32:10It's a nail
32:10Put nine nuts
32:12Or nails in the nappy
32:17I've got the nail
32:18Is this guy holding something?
32:20Oh my god
32:21He's holding a nut
32:24Oh my god
32:25Do you remember all the other things also holding nuts?
32:30Oh wow, that's so small
32:32What is it?
32:33It's a nut
32:34Oh
32:34There's something in there
32:36He's going to have lots of nuts
32:37One, two, three, four
32:40Is this the nappy?
32:42You're making me take underwear off a doll
32:45And that feels very wrong
32:47If you want
32:48If I want
32:50None of this is what I want
32:52I don't think it's big enough to hold everything
32:54Oh, okay
32:56So then this would be the nappy
32:57So I did this for no reason
33:00Oh, damn it
33:02It's a nut
33:03Okay
33:05Oh, yeah
33:06That's nine, baby
33:08I have got
33:10Nine
33:11Nuts
33:14Honestly
33:15Very proud of how it handled that
33:17I've still got the clock
33:18Wow
33:19I feel like I nailed that
33:24I went through a few emotions with you, Kamel
33:26During that
33:26My fear was that people in Hollywood would be watching
33:30And they would see you jump with fear over a jack-in-the-box that you'd set yourself
33:35And then, of course, we hit upon the thing that I think everyone will remember you for
33:40And that's taking tiny pants off a doll
33:46So you said nappy, I didn't know there was a nappy because we weren't allowed to look away from the
33:50card
33:50And I thought, well, I don't think I could fit nine nails in this baby doll's underwear
33:59Joanna was absolutely on point
34:01A sense of absolute authority
34:04Particularly proved by, right, this is a party popper
34:07I'm going to fire it on the floor
34:10Why?
34:10Why?
34:12I don't want to take any of the crew out
34:14Joanna had a very good tactic because every time you look away, one minute will be added to your time
34:17And you said, right, we're going to have a little look at the beginning
34:19Yeah
34:20But if you just carried on, it's every time you look away
34:22You could look away once, gather all nine
34:24Oh my God
34:26We thought you were going to do that, you started doing that and then you stopped yourself
34:29Oh my God, that's unbelievable
34:32Kamel, you looked away so many times
34:34It took you 12 minutes, 15 seconds to find the nine things
34:37And you looked away 78 times
34:38Oh my God
34:40Oh, over an hour and a half
34:41Oh my God
34:42Over an hour and a half
34:43Compared to Joanna
34:44Five minutes, 40
34:45Oh, thank God
34:46Looked away 31 times
34:47So that's 36 minutes, 40 seconds
34:49Oh my God
34:50Now it's Amy and Joel's turn to put pine nuts in the nappy
34:55Is that a nut?
35:01It's a nut
35:02Oh, great
35:02Are you allergic to nuts?
35:04Oh, no
35:05Yeah, no
35:06Not for the nails
35:08Not for the nails, no
35:09Oh, that's a slight look away
35:10Oh
35:11Oh
35:12Oh
35:13Oh
35:15Oh
35:16Oh
35:16Oh
35:16Oh
35:18Oh
35:23It's wet
35:25It's wet and that's soft
35:26That's like a hammer or something
35:28Mm-hmm
35:28OK
35:29OK
35:30OK
35:30OK
35:31OK
35:32Oh, ice
35:34Ice balls
35:35What would an ice ball be?
35:36What is that?
35:37It's icy
35:39There could be something inside the ice
35:43Oh
35:46Oh
35:46It's a duck
35:47It's a goddamn duck
35:49It's not a finger
35:50Oh
35:51A nail
35:52Nail
35:53These have to melt
35:55Oh
35:56Yeah
36:01Is that a nut?
36:04Oh
36:04Oh, yes
36:06Four of the nails there
36:08Can I get them off?
36:10Oh, baby
36:11Oh, baby
36:12Oh, baby
36:12It's a duck
36:13It's a fucking duck
36:15Please be a nut
36:17Yes
36:19That is a nut
36:21Oh
36:24Are you trying to melt an ice ball?
36:26Yeah
36:29It's gonna be in one of these, isn't it?
36:30It's gonna be in one of these
36:31Hammer
36:32There's a hammer
36:37Oh
36:37Alex
36:38It's nearly out
36:39Great news
36:40Ah
36:41That's out
36:42That's out
36:44Oh, it's a nail
36:46Oh, this is great
36:49That's out
36:50That's out quick as a flash
36:51Last one
36:53Nails
36:54I haven't got many nails
36:55There's got to be, like, more nails
36:57Do you knew when we find nails?
36:58Uh
37:00In the wall
37:01Oh
37:02Oh
37:04Stop it
37:05Where's my hammer?
37:08Three more
37:09Oh, that's so fun
37:11This is a nail nail
37:14Oh, it just came out
37:16Ah
37:17Some clock
37:18I've stopped the clock
37:20Oh
37:21That felt cool
37:2230 seconds
37:24Yeah
37:25Oh, we've wanted to use the other side of the hammer
37:30I've stopped the clock
37:31Yes
37:35Well, I often liken Joel to a child in this series
37:41And he didn't disappoint
37:42He was the only person to put nuts in his mouth
37:45He shouted
37:46Oh, that's so fun to pull out
37:48And I had to nail
37:49My favourite quote
37:50I've always wanted to use the other side of a hammer
37:53So great
37:54You know, it's all fun
37:55Hitting them in
37:57But I've never
37:58I've never had the confidence to pull them out
38:01You started off childlike as well, I thought
38:04There was actually a still where I thought
38:06Oh, Amy looks ten years of age there
38:08Yeah, here
38:08Oh, I'm all wet
38:10Oh
38:12They look cute
38:14You certainly got rid of any innocence
38:16Once you started defrosting ice cubes with your cleavage
38:20I found myself going, ooh, matron
38:24Well, well, yeah, she did do well
38:26She did it in nine minutes, eight seconds
38:29Joel, 18 minutes, 48 seconds
38:31But Joel only looked away six times in total
38:33Wow
38:34By far the least
38:35Amy looked away ten times in total
38:38Okay
38:38Which means you scored 24 minutes 48
38:41Amy, 19 minutes eight seconds
38:43She's in the lead at the moment
38:44Good
38:44Wow, yeah
38:45One person left to see
38:47And is the fact that you've kept me to the end
38:50It's interesting, isn't it?
38:51Because I might come across as a lunatic
38:54Well, I'm sure we're all looking forward to seeing old McDonalds
39:00Right, that's the end of part three
39:02Soon, someone will win five ordinary household items
39:05And then have to celebrate with them on stage
39:07In what is set to be the blandest end credit sequence
39:10We've ever had on the show
39:12We'll see you in a minute
39:23Hello! Here we are then
39:26It's the last part of the show
39:28And the first item on the agenda
39:29Is completing a task involving some intense concentration
39:32Yes, because they have to stare at the task the whole time
39:36While trying to source nine nuts and or nails
39:39And if you're after a good concentration face
39:42Then look no further than the final attempt with Armando
39:47Ooh, is that a nappy?
39:50Got the nappy?
39:52Right
39:54Ha-ha-ha-ha
39:55I've got a nut
39:56Yes
39:59Actually quite therapeutic
40:01Right, I'm done with this
40:03OK
40:03I'm bored with glop
40:05Poppers, I mean
40:06I mean, as in party poppers
40:08Yeah
40:09There we go
40:10Like that
40:10Ow
40:11Did something come out of that?
40:12Yeah, hit me
40:13Yeah
40:13So if I do
40:14That
40:17Oh, it's a nut
40:18Yes
40:20Whoa
40:21Right
40:23Oh, hang on
40:25Can't go wrong with a sock
40:26All right
40:28Oh
40:28Yes, there's a nut
40:30I forgot that I could actually hold things up in front of me
40:32I actually forgot
40:35The use of my eyes
40:36Why are you looking up so high?
40:39Well
40:40Yes, I could look down, couldn't I, while I'm doing all this?
40:45Ah
40:46Oh
40:46It's a hammer
40:48What's this?
40:49What the fuck is this?
40:51I don't know, that's
40:53That's disappointing
40:58Oh
40:58Oh
40:59Oh
41:00The goldmine
41:01If he dies
41:02Yeah
41:12Who's that?
41:14Jimmy
41:15Is he like a nut?
41:17He'll nut you
41:18Jimmy nut
41:19Jimmy nut
41:20If it is, it's weak
41:23No, it's not Jimmy nuts
41:25Ooh
41:26Something fell there
41:29Here's a nut
41:30And while I'm here, I might as well just do a general sweep round as I turn
41:43Stop the clock
41:44Oh
41:44Oh
41:49It was Jimmy Nail, not Jimmy nut
41:51Exactly
41:52Jimmy Nail
41:52Yeah, I worked out now
41:54I worked out now
41:55I just got it
41:59There was character work there
42:00Oh, the hammer
42:04I mean, I think this episode has set you free
42:06Can't wait for the finale
42:09Well, he was doing well, he was quite quick
42:1111 minutes, 11 seconds
42:13Oh
42:13But there were 35 looks away
42:15So, scores wise
42:16Obviously, Kamal, one point
42:18With an hour and a half
42:19Armanda, you were second last
42:21You get two points
42:2246 minutes in total
42:24Joanna, third
42:24Three points
42:25Joel, second
42:26Four points
42:27The winner was Amy Gladfield
42:28With 19 minutes and five points
42:30OK, everyone
42:33Please make your way to the stage for the final task of the show
42:42Who won the region of Saskatchewan?
42:44Amy Gladhill
42:46Gladhill
42:46Sir, wearing your mask correctly at all times, tell your teammate when to stop with their mop
42:57The person whose mop stops closest to their face without touching their face wins the round
43:05The mop bearer must slowly walk at a constant pace and softly squeak at a constant volume
43:15Best team after five rounds wins
43:20It's a team task
43:21Joanna and Armanda are one team, of course
43:24And then we've got the team of three
43:25It's like a squeaky joust
43:27It's like a squeaky joust
43:27It's what Henry VIII used to do with
43:30Let's squeak joust
43:34BEEP
43:35BEEP
43:36BEEP
43:37BEEP
43:38BEEP
43:39BEEP
43:39BEEP
43:40BEEP
43:40BEEP
43:40BEEP
43:41BEEP
43:41BEEP
43:42BEEP
43:45BEEP
43:45Stay there, I'm going to measure I think
43:49From the nose to the mop
43:51We have 60 centimetres to the middle of the mop
43:55We have 45 centimetres, the team of two are 1-0 up
44:00BEEP
44:01What you doing?
44:02That's very impressive
44:04On the whistle, squeak
44:05BEEP
44:06BEEP
44:07BEEP
44:08BEEP
44:09BEEP
44:09BEEP
44:13BEEP
44:16Stop
44:17BEEP
44:18takie
44:19They struck the mop, touched the face
44:24The Maori two win again
44:25Thank you
44:28Oh!
44:30So close!
44:31So close.
44:32Round three.
44:332-0 to the team of two so far, Greg.
44:35Come on, team.
44:35Ready?
44:36Squeak.
44:37E!
44:38E!
44:39E!
44:40E!
44:41E!
44:42E!
44:44Stop!
44:45Stop!
44:46Oh!
44:49Oh, that was good.
44:51Ah!
44:52Team is way back in, it's 2-1.
44:56Can I be Amy?
44:57Yeah!
44:58Oh!
44:59I'm cool with that.
45:00I'm cool with that.
45:00If you wouldn't mind raising your mops.
45:02Do I look good?
45:03You look fantastic.
45:04Masks on!
45:05Do not slow down.
45:06And squeak.
45:08E!
45:09E!
45:10E!
45:10E!
45:12E!
45:13E!
45:14E!
45:15E!
45:16E!
45:17Stop!
45:19Stop!
45:20Oh!
45:20Oh!
45:22Oh!
45:23I think it's fine.
45:24I think it's fine.
45:25It's a centimetre.
45:27I've gone...
45:28Wait, really?
45:29The team of two have won again.
45:30It's 3-1 to the team of two!
45:32Oh!
45:34It is so close.
45:35The best celebration from Amy for a loss there.
45:39OK, it's the final round, Greg.
45:41Again, constant pace.
45:42No slowing down.
45:43And squeak.
45:44E!
45:44E!
45:46E!
45:46E!
45:48E!
45:48E!
45:49E!
45:50E!
45:50E!
45:51E!
45:51Stop!
45:53Oh!
45:54This is close.
45:55OK, to the edge of the mop this time.
45:5931 centimetres.
46:00Whoa!
46:00To the edge of the mop.
46:0313 centimetres.
46:03They've won again at 4-1.
46:05The team of two wins!
46:08We'll add that to the scores.
46:10Come down and join me!
46:12Well done.
46:17What an enjoyable game.
46:19Joanna and Armando were in sync, weren't they?
46:21In sync!
46:22They won 4-1, which of course converts to 5-2 in points.
46:26So it's two points to the team of three.
46:28Five to Joanna and Armando!
46:30CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
46:32Armando Young.
46:33So, for a close episode, the team of two both got 18 points.
46:38They're both in second place because Amy's got 19 points!
46:42CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
46:54Jamie Jeffery!
46:57CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
47:24CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
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