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00:09Back! Back! Give a class with that, you big scrote!
00:15I wandered in here by accident once too.
00:18Big fella nearly took me arm.
00:20The employee exit's on the right.
00:22Don't worry, you'll get the hang of it.
00:24I'm Roisin. Is this your first shift?
00:27Come on, the exit's this way. Just watch that meat rocket.
00:37There is just no need.
00:49Bombing door.
00:58Sorry, sexy. I forgot to tell you I busted the door.
01:02A kid called Mav's gonna fix it.
01:08How was your day, Mav?
01:12Good.
01:36Well, skid, it's a steamy one up here in the top end today.
01:39And in backpacker news, Task Force Hammer.
01:41Yep.
01:42It's Swedish for Hammer.
01:43They have ping pong from Bing Bong.
01:45Still on the search for the Swedish backpackers
01:47who were last sighted in a white four-wheel drive at Crossley's Crossing.
01:51And you'll be cross, folks, if you miss out on catching a big one
01:54and chasing Wade's Big Barrel Blashtanza
01:56that kicks off in Dirk's River today.
01:59Are you sure we should do it here, Bill?
02:01Yeah, this is the bush turkey's turf.
02:03Everyone steers clear.
02:04Set up inside.
02:07What is that bloody banging?
02:19Eddie, let's get a hop along. Come on.
02:26Eddie!
02:28I reckon it's coming from over here.
02:32It is coming from the courtroom.
02:34What is it? Is it a brushy stack?
02:35Oh, bloody hell. Open up.
02:37Come on. What are you doing in there?
02:39I'm freezing my flaps off in here.
02:41Oh, my God. Were you in the courtroom all night?
02:43It's three degrees in there.
02:44What you two are doing is sick.
02:46Crocodiles are a protected species.
02:48They've been around since the dinosaurs, okay?
02:50They hang out with Triceratops
02:51and you fucks are selling them as bar snacks.
02:52I'm very disappointed.
02:54The gloves are my ancestors.
02:55I'd seen a cook, Roger, and he knows that, eh?
02:58Yeah, someone must have snuck it in there when Dingo was on.
03:00Oh, yeah, someone. Was it someone you?
03:02You? Was it you?
03:03Oh, you're proper mad.
03:04We don't know who put them in there.
03:05The security cameras are shot out.
03:07Oh, you're a little piss fuck.
03:10Alright, you two, leave those crocs where they are
03:12on top of the Alcapops, okay?
03:13There's dodgy shit going on in there.
03:20Oh, this tummy's rock hard.
03:22He's all locked up, Abs.
03:24His poos are lined up like Matchbox cars.
03:26Hi, love.
03:27Hi, sexy.
03:28You seen Eddie?
03:28No.
03:29Abby, how'd you go with the toe?
03:31Not good, man.
03:31His anus is clamped shut-ups.
03:33It's weird.
03:34It's like he's holding it in on purpose.
03:36Come with me.
03:36I've got some apple cider vinegar to make that dead toe rocket right out of him.
03:39Okay.
03:40Now, how's your sex life?
03:41Um, Collins.
03:42Hey, where have you been?
03:44I got locked in the call room all night.
03:46What?
03:46My pubes have got hypothermia.
03:48They fuse together like instant noodles.
03:49Hear that?
03:50No, don't make the sound.
03:52Didn't you notice I was gone?
03:52I saw you sleeping in your nook, Eddie.
03:55That was a pile of shorts.
03:56Right.
03:56Well, the smell was exactly the same.
03:58What's that?
03:59Is that the body part?
04:00Don's foot.
04:01Not much good to us.
04:02Me and that ranger with the rainbow paddle-pop eyes.
04:04Mickey found it near Dickie's knob.
04:05It's got no type.
04:06Anyway, come on.
04:07Let's rattle our dicks.
04:08We've got a chomp to catch.
04:10How'd you get the drone footage?
04:11I shot it out of the sky.
04:13What?
04:20Um, so ma'am, that Don Daryl drawing shows all of his body parts that have been found,
04:24right?
04:24Right.
04:25Eddie thinks the rest has been eaten by crocodiles, but maybe you can use these parts to reinvestigate
04:29Don's cause of death?
04:30Yes.
04:31If all you want to know is that he died from dying, I really need Don's torso.
04:35I know.
04:36I was just deluding myself for fun.
04:39Oh!
04:40Oh, sorry.
04:41That's a vibrator.
04:41Kath gave it to me.
04:43She said it's time I've stopped being afraid of my own vagina.
04:46Okay.
04:47So, between the remains that Toby ate and the drone footage that I haven't seen but I hear
04:52is wonderful, we can establish Don's Donga as our primary crime scene.
04:57Yes, it looks like this scene's been cleaned and judging by the water runoff, I think it
05:00was pressure hosed.
05:01But my team and I are heading back down there to see what we can find.
05:04Lauren and Oliver and Toby are just having a quick coffee first.
05:08Together.
05:10This murder wall's a real triumph, ma'am.
05:11I know.
05:12I know.
05:12Leo did it.
05:13Leo?
05:14Yeah.
05:14There I knew you.
05:15I'm their mentor, they're mementos.
05:18They wouldn't be lost without me.
05:19They're the wings beneath my wind.
05:20Hi.
05:21Oh my god!
05:22Leo!
05:22Sorry, sorry.
05:24I've been wearing bright colours to make my lurking less paranormal but it's not working.
05:27Yeah, no shit mate.
05:28Invest in the bell.
05:29Leo, hi.
05:30I'm Abby.
05:31I worked with the mams back in Deadlock where we started out as colleagues but then became
05:35best friends for life.
05:36Nice to meet you.
05:37Okay, big eyes, come on, let's clear a spot for mementos.
05:40Okay.
05:41New team is assembled.
05:43Nobody fuck up.
05:44What?
05:44Backpack.
05:45How are you going with that drone footage of Chomp?
05:47Collins is absolutely creamy to see that.
05:48I sent it to your email.
05:50Email?
05:50What?
05:51She's never had an email.
05:52I will get it up on mine.
05:54Okay, so our prime suspect is Chomp.
05:56What do we know about Chomp?
05:56Age, prayers, residential address, relationship to the victim.
05:59What are you going on about, mate?
06:00What do you mean?
06:01What do you mean?
06:02I mean Chomp is not a person.
06:04Chomp is the Land of Crocs mascot.
06:06Oh, you never said that.
06:07Yes, I did.
06:08I said the killer is inside Chomp.
06:10No, you didn't say that.
06:11Someone is wearing Chomp.
06:11Please stop fighting.
06:12Yeah, I do get it.
06:13I am across the concept of a costume.
06:16Are you?
06:17Okay.
06:18What the shit's got up to you this morning?
06:20Nothing.
06:20Not getting enough sleep.
06:20Yes, I did.
06:21Not enough sex.
06:21Too much sex.
06:22Have a private car, fucking grumpy bum.
06:24Alright, so whoever is in Chomp's costume must be on Jason Wade's payroll.
06:28Collins, how'd you go out of the Land of Crocs yesterday?
06:30Ah, yes.
06:31So, Wade said that the 300k payment was to, by King,
06:36three of his four PAs confirmed that Jason was out of town filming his TV show the night
06:41that Don was murdered.
06:42Is that a snake skin?
06:43Is that the skin of a snake?
06:44Just because Jason's alibi is sewn up like a Christmas turkey's arsehole
06:48doesn't mean that he's not behind it all.
06:50What would Jason gain by killing Don?
06:53He has everything, bar the ability to make eye contact with a woman he doesn't want to sleep with.
06:57It's a classic territorial dispute, you know?
06:59Old bullcrog versus new bullcrog.
07:02Their business is a side-by-side.
07:03Jason probably wants to take over Don's part of the river.
07:06Colonising is a very hard habit to break.
07:08Okay, so you think Jason killed Don to get his land,
07:10and he's delegated this task to high-density craft foam.
07:14Yeah, there's no way Puffy Peck's Jason is going to do the dirty work himself.
07:17That's why we've got to find out who he had in that Chomp costume on Sunday night.
07:21Oh, yes. Mementos.
07:23What are the rules around me talking in this environment?
07:25Do not allow.
07:26The floor is yours.
07:27Go for it.
07:28Flora, the singer from the pub, also works at Land of Crocs.
07:30She says that staff rotate being chomped due to OH&S.
07:33Oh, yeah. That'll be because of that Mickey Mouse. You know that story?
07:36So sad. Just sitting there, people coming up, taking their photos with him.
07:39Turns out he was dead. Stiffy Mouse.
07:42Flora also says that staff who wear chomp can't be claustrophobic.
07:45They have to be free of pubic lice and at least five-nine.
07:48Why's that? Stage presence?
07:49No, it's in order to see out of the mouth hole.
07:52Okay, let's get a suspect list together then.
07:53So how many staff does Jason have?
07:55Oh, I can plan that out, man.
07:56Nah, it's too boring, Big Ice. Backpack can do that.
07:59I need you to test this. Spoiler alert, it's a foot.
08:01Kept a car for you. I will put that up on the board.
08:04Okay, so Leo, Land of Crocs staff.
08:06So all up, including the CEO, that's Jason, and the celebrant, that is also Jason.
08:11Land of Crocs has just over 60 employees.
08:1360? That's super. Investigating.
08:15All 60 should be a breeze?
08:18Seeing we're four people working out of a storeroom with a possible snake infestation.
08:21Alright, let's just go around to the Land of Dicks and give them a razz.
08:23No razz.
08:24His main staff won't be there. They'll be at the Bashnanza.
08:26It starts today and Jason's doing a meet and greet with his boys.
08:29Who's his boys?
08:30They work with Jason and appear on his TV shows.
08:33Okay, we'll head to the Bashnanza then.
08:34Leo, find out what time they're on and we'll question them about Sunday.
08:37Yeah, fuck yeah. Drop a quick line in.
08:38No, no.
08:39Something's weird with this foot.
08:40What is it? Soft nail issue?
08:42The autopsy said that a knife was used to cut up the body post-mortem, but I think that's wrong.
08:47The severance line on the tibia is too clean to be a knife.
08:50Look!
08:50No, thank you.
08:51It's a precision cut. I think the foot was removed by a motorised blade.
08:58A forensics van pulled up and parked in my spot before I could park in my spot,
09:02and I'd like my spot back because it's my spot, not their spot.
09:05Okay?
09:10Okay, so we need to interview Jason's boys and locate this motor blade weapon.
09:14Yeah, but ma'am, I really need to get something off my chest.
09:16Okay, right now?
09:17Yes.
09:17I'm so sorry I quit the police force to pursue my dreams.
09:21It's fine.
09:21I mean, now you're stuck with me.
09:22It's really fine.
09:23And I'm in hell of my own creation.
09:25It's really fine, Abby.
09:27Please don't forget me, ma'am.
09:28Okay, but they are driving off without you.
09:31Wait!
09:32Wait, wait.
09:32Bye!
09:34Eddie, we gotta go.
09:35Yep.
09:35I need you to do a drill for me.
09:37Oh, no, I can't.
09:37Seeing Sergeant Heffin has asked me to supervise the removal and return of a Barra Creek local
09:41by the name of, um, uh, Triple Pet, and Mr. Pet needs me.
09:46Okay.
09:47Look, I need you to search this address from mouth hole to crack hole, okay?
09:54Is this for the John Darrell case?
09:56Yeah, 100%.
09:57Do you have a warrant?
09:58Yeah, yeah.
09:58I'm emailing it from my email right now.
10:00Ping.
10:00There you go.
10:01Eddie, come on.
10:02Yep.
10:03Yep, so Jason's boys aren't appearing until 2pm.
10:05Right.
10:06Flora's gonna help me cut the list down.
10:07She's been at Land of Crocs for three months and her loyalty's really waning.
10:10She's offered to call me a key.
10:11Oh, I don't want to be necessary.
10:12She should take her up on that.
10:13That won't be necessary.
10:13Okay, so while we wait for the boys to appear at the Bashnanza, let's search for our weapon.
10:18Mate, the killer would've just pissed it in the river.
10:20Okay, so we get some divers out there.
10:22No.
10:23You can't get divers.
10:24Why not?
10:25Are they at a conference?
10:26No, because it's a river, Collins.
10:28Huh?
10:29It's teeming with crocodiles.
10:30Oh, right, yes.
10:31You can't swim in there.
10:32Uh, so what do you do?
10:33Well, we used to have a community swimming pool.
10:35That's what the diving board is there.
10:36She's seen me jump off out of the yard.
10:37No, how do you search the river?
10:39Eddie.
10:39Use a big magnet.
10:41A big magnet.
10:43What is this, Looney Tunes?
10:46Okay, great.
10:47Great.
10:47Where do we find ourselves a big magnet?
10:50No, you don't.
10:51Um, right here in Barracreek.
10:53I know a local with one.
10:55Oh, I'm Gaffrey, my good there, Robert.
10:58It's alright.
10:59I said it, he will do you fuck all.
11:01Okay.
11:02We've got to get him home first, but then it'll be 50% of me cash, right?
11:0850% of Rog, because it's his boat, but it's my big magnet.
11:13That works, yes?
11:14Oh, yeah, it's how we found all my Christmas presents growing up.
11:16Fuck up, it winner.
11:17You fuck up.
11:18What eight-year-old wants a fucking car park covered in fish shit?
11:21It was a catalytic converter.
11:23They're worth coin.
11:24Can you not antagonise your dad?
11:26We need him today.
11:27Okay, we've ordered our offer.
11:28It's now $300 an hour.
11:30Fuck no.
11:30Look, he's taking the piss.
11:32Okay, we won't do it then.
11:33No worries.
11:33No worries.
11:34I'll get my own fucking magnet.
11:35Sure, sure, sure.
11:36We can all get a big magnet.
11:38Thank you, yes.
11:39$300 every single hour is a great deal.
11:41Thank you, we appreciate your help, Frank, don't we, Edward?
11:43I've got my fucking eye on you too, you rat-dog crop thieves.
11:46All right, no one gets paid till Dickhat delivers.
11:49Hey, Rog, listen to this one.
11:50No fuss, right?
11:52Who's been an old man?
11:53Because you are my old man.
11:55I've had front row seats to your bullshit for four decades.
11:58I know what you're capable of.
12:00Go to the car.
12:01See you, Triple Cat.
12:03Come on, push him down.
12:04Okay, well, we will need to start out at Don's Dongo.
12:08Oh, fuck my big long dick.
12:11Who took the sack off his head?
12:13That is to keep some careful.
12:15Oh, Eddie, we've got to get to the Bashnanza.
12:20The butterfly farm was actually great.
12:22I had no idea how many butterfly eat corpses.
12:25You know, it's definitely worth it.
12:27Anyway, that's it.
12:28That's it for my plans for the day and for the rest of the trip, actually.
12:33I think I'm going to get into my book from the pub book swap.
12:37Breathless Falls.
12:38Have you read it?
12:39I think my mums have it on their bookshelf.
12:41I grew up with two mums in Sydney.
12:42They were 78ers.
12:43My first car was a pride float.
12:45It was decorated like the island of Lesbos.
12:47So yeah, you know, fair to say Barrow Creek's the straightest context I've been in for a while.
12:51Aside from that one Ed Sheeran concert that I went to, which was awful.
12:55So sad.
12:57I love that there's another queer person in town, Leo.
13:01We just get each other, don't we?
13:02Sorry, Leo.
13:03Sorry.
13:04Was I gone for long because I went to get a ward on and totally forgot about you and had
13:08enough.
13:09Wait, what are we doing again?
13:10Oh, land of crocs, please.
13:12Okay.
13:13I'm going to leave you guys to it.
13:14Let me know if you need anything like head massages or legal advice.
13:19I'm a vet too.
13:20If you've got a Brahmin cow that leads antibiotics, I'll be over here.
13:23I'm going to be relaxing.
13:25I'm on holiday after all.
13:28Okay, so those two flew home last month.
13:31I don't know where that guy went.
13:32Yeah, but borrowed this too.
13:34That takes 100% capable of motorbots.
13:36She's only 4'11".
13:38Liv!
13:39I'm going to get the phone!
13:40And Rasheen fucked that guy.
13:42Now he lives in a Reiki tent on an avocado farm or something.
13:46Barrow Creek Pub, this is Kath.
13:50Well, it's a matter of opening to the Big Baradash Mans
13:53where one lucky fish-o could catch the golden barrel worth $200,000.
13:59$200,000?
14:00That's a lucrative bloody fish, BP.
14:02But remember, fellas, with over 4,000 barramundi released into the river for the Baradash Mans
14:06every one of you has a shot at winning a daily prize if you catch a big one.
14:10And now on the Guts Hub stage, he's hot off the chopper.
14:14It's the star of Jason Wade's Adventures Down Under Adventures from Down Under.
14:18It's Jason Wade!
14:23Welcome to the Big Baradash Mans!
14:28Goal!
14:30This is German.
14:31How would he like it if we told him he couldn't go fishing?
14:34Boss!
14:36Come on, we're going!
14:39Oh, okay, good.
14:40Leo's eliminated a bunch of the Lander Croc staff.
14:43Who could have been inside the chomp suit on Sunday night.
14:45Sanitation's out, so is the aquarist.
14:47A lot of the croquettes have been deported to the UK,
14:49so that mostly just leaves the boys and a few others.
14:53Alright, Leo has sent the boys photos and bio.
14:57Oh, uh, no.
14:59I think they've accidentally just said the same man 15 times.
15:03Give it up for the boys!
15:04Uh, no.
15:05Collins?
15:06They haven't.
15:07We've got Ben!
15:08We've got Sam!
15:10We've got Ned!
15:12Nico!
15:13And my boy Ben!
15:16Come on!
15:20Jesus Christ!
15:25And, fellas, don't forget to head over to the Shimano Fishing Reel marquee
15:29for the meet and greet with the boys.
15:30This line can suck my titties!
15:33Agreed.
15:34Join the reserves?
15:35No.
15:36No, thank you.
15:40So...
15:43How do you flirt with girls?
15:45Do all just weather chat or the other topics that work as well?
15:49What?
15:50Well, you know, like at the camp, you and Kath,
15:52you froth on about the weather and then immediately
15:54you're fiddling each other's bits.
15:55Oh, God.
15:56So I was just wondering...
15:56Do all the lesseys get juiced up about weather?
16:00No, no.
16:00What about the weather in particular?
16:01Rain.
16:02We're not talking about this.
16:03Mist.
16:03Soft.
16:04We're not talking about this, Eddie.
16:05Enough.
16:05Hey, a croc boy's on the move.
16:06You stay here.
16:07We're conquering the world.
16:08No, Eddie.
16:09Please don't leave me here with all of the...
16:18Eddie!
16:23Next, please.
16:25Next, please.
16:26Just keep it...
16:26No, I just...
16:27G'day, g'day.
16:29Name?
16:30Uh, Detective Dulcy Collins.
16:32We met yesterday.
16:33Good stuff.
16:33Gripping a rod today?
16:34Uh, no.
16:35I am here in regards to...
16:37International.
16:37There's your final.
16:39Very special to meet you.
16:40Who's next?
16:46Thanks for dropping me off, guys.
16:48Really appreciate it.
16:49Just leave me alone in a crime scene where a man's been chopped up and a violent murderer
16:53is on the loose.
16:54Cool.
16:54Yeah, I'll just sit here on a platter for them till you're ready to pick me up.
17:00What is that?
17:07Oi!
17:08Be careful.
17:09You're in the lunch position there.
17:20Uh, Detective Dulcy Collins, I want to ask you a few questions in relation to an ongoing
17:25investigation.
17:26Absolutely.
17:27100%, Ducky.
17:27Uh, Dulcy, where were you six nights ago on Sunday the 9th of October?
17:31Oh, I was around Gourmandir River in West Arnhem Land, Ducky.
17:33Filming Adventures Down Under.
17:34Adventures from Down Under.
17:36And can anyone verify that?
17:37Yeah, absolutely.
17:38100%.
17:38All the boys were there.
17:39Uh, who?
17:40Hanna was there.
17:40Darcy was there.
17:41Josh was there.
17:43Tom, Ned, Mick was there.
17:45Yo!
17:45Hey Mick, I'm just answering questions for Dickie.
17:47You're all good.
17:48Dulcy.
17:48Dulcy's questions.
17:49Uh, who else was there?
17:50Ben, Rory, Seb, Jed.
17:52And you're Jed.
17:54Nah, nah mate, I'm Ned.
17:55Right, sorry, yes.
17:56Uh, sorry.
17:57So did Jason take all of you boys?
17:59You know, Mick, Sam, Ned, the Bens, etc.
18:02filming on Sunday?
18:03Yeah, yeah, Dick.
18:03Yeah, all the boys were out there Sunday night.
18:05There he is!
18:06Ah!
18:06I'll stick my finger up your ass!
18:08Detective!
18:09Um, I need you out the river real quick.
18:11It's going up there!
18:12So you and all your crock-blocks were all shooting Jason's TV show on Sunday night, hooked
18:16together, cocked a bum like a barrel full of fucking fuck monkeys?
18:19Yeah, that's right, 100%.
18:20Hey, good to talk to you, legend.
18:22Keep it real!
18:22What?
18:24Fuck me!
18:27Hey, Alira, got any cugs?
18:30We haven't restocked them yet.
18:31They're at the back.
18:35I'll get you one.
18:40Fuck off me, Pete.
18:42Ah, comments.
18:43What's happening?
18:43What did you want?
18:44A fan of?
18:46I wasn't listening.
18:48Who wants to feed Batfish as a competition prize?
18:51We want money.
18:52Yeah, we've got stuff to pay for.
18:53A pool.
18:54A broken boat.
18:55And also, Batfish again.
18:58Hey, you better stop that before Aunty hears.
19:00I know she loves her Batfish.
19:01Hey, you lot.
19:02Hello, Pat.
19:03What are you doing here?
19:04I thought you'd be out there reeling in a big one.
19:06They wouldn't let us enter the Golden Barrier, even though Mav said he was 18 and then said
19:11I was 25.
19:12Well, that's because you know all the good fishing spots.
19:14They're afraid you're going to win all the money.
19:16That's right.
19:18Hey, mate.
19:19I don't think we've met.
19:20This is our cousin Mav.
19:21He's living with us now.
19:23He's fruit toast intolerant, so we can't get mangoes anymore.
19:26Ah, Mav.
19:27You're Mickey's uncle's boy, right?
19:29You've stayed with her before.
19:30I knew it.
19:31I'll never forget a pair of cheeks I want to squeeze.
19:35Come on.
19:36What's the sick?
19:37Let's go.
19:38What's wrong with him?
19:39He looks okay.
19:40Nah.
19:40He's got a dog box.
19:42Alright.
19:42You guys want to lift back to Barra?
19:44Can we, Mav?
19:45No.
19:46Sure, Pat.
19:47I don't want to walk.
19:48It's too hot.
19:49Stop lining up my phone, Collins.
19:50I'm on my way now.
19:52Oi!
19:53Alera!
19:54What the fuck are you doing?
19:55Where's my fucking coke?
19:57I'm on a break.
20:06Just stand back.
20:07Oi!
20:08Someone caught a big one.
20:09No, no one caught a big one.
20:10Okay?
20:11Okay?
20:11Please get back.
20:12You're getting dangerously close to marble frog hibernation burrows.
20:15Come on.
20:15Oi!
20:16Hey!
20:17You heard the lady.
20:18Move the fuck away from her special fucking frogs.
20:21Jeez.
20:21But come back tomorrow.
20:23And there's lots of info here about caring for country and other stuff that you don't give
20:26a shit about.
20:28Why are you always yelling?
20:29Huh?
20:30That's the most foot traffic we've had.
20:31Oh, you shout too.
20:33No, that's you doing that.
20:34I'm soft as fuck normally.
20:36Fuck on.
20:36Righto.
20:37Collins, I'm back.
20:38I'm coke-less.
20:38What have you got for me?
20:40Oh.
20:41Holy shit.
20:42Oh, fuck me.
20:44Yes, welcome to this.
20:47Mickey's colleague Isaac was out on his big dinghy boat and found it wedged in some mangroves.
20:53Yeah, did he say where?
20:54Nah.
20:55He dumped it here, said he was too traumatised to work, browsed for sunglasses on his phone
21:00for 10 minutes, then he went to his other job at Knob Nightclub, so he's clearly torn
21:03up.
21:04Okay.
21:05So what have we got here?
21:07Yeah.
21:07It's an anterior and posterior lower torso-pelvic region encompassing the genitalia and anus
21:16there.
21:17So it's a dick bum.
21:18A dick and a bum.
21:19Yeah, it's a dick bum.
21:19Yeah, that's what it is.
21:20It's a dick bum.
21:21That's what it is.
21:22It's a dick bum.
21:27I'm going to go get a coke.
21:29Yeah.
21:33What?
21:34Nothing.
21:35Fuck off.
21:35Yep.
21:36All right.
21:36I'm going to go get a coke.
21:37Cool forensics, but it does fit Don's profile.
21:40The right mystical's missing.
21:41Okay.
21:41I'll just confirm with my dick stick.
21:42No, don't confirm with it.
21:43Don't confirm with a stick.
21:45Don't.
21:45Use a stick, Eddie.
21:46I suspected no right tentacle.
21:47Testicle.
21:48Tenticle.
21:48I just told you that.
21:51Don't.
21:51Don't.
21:51Yucky.
21:52Don't.
21:53Yuck, Eddie.
21:54Abby.
21:55I'm glad you called so I can officially log with someone that I'm alive.
21:58For now.
21:59We need you out here at the Bashnanza.
22:01Don's pelvis is turned up.
22:02I know it's not the full torso, but it would still be good for you to have a look.
22:05Okay, but I'm going to be a while.
22:06I'm getting a lift with some fishermen who won't tell me their names.
22:09One's giving me nothing, and the other says he's Mr. Surname Redacted.
22:12Oh, also, I found oil residue in the water near Don's Jetty.
22:15It's where Trump's boat was moored.
22:17According to the fishermen, if there's oil in the water, it means the boat's leaking fuel.
22:21And if the boat's leaking fuel, that means the engine's fucked.
22:24Yeah, it's fucked.
22:25Right, okay.
22:25So we're looking for a Land of Crocs employee who owns a boat with a faulty engine.
22:29Yes, ma'am.
22:30Maybe I can trace the journey of the tinny via the fuel trail?
22:34Oh, the fishermen are nodding, ma'am.
22:36It's Leo, my mentors.
22:37Bye, ma'am.
22:38Backpack.
22:39What you got for me?
22:39Yes, hello to you.
22:41There's three Land of Crocs staff who Flora and I can't account for on Sunday night.
22:44One of them used to work for Don Darrell.
22:46Who?
22:46His name is Stephen Hulahat.
22:48Goes by the name of Spud.
22:50He's a local.
22:51Do you know him?
22:54Hello?
23:05Wait, what do you just want to do this afternoon?
23:07I want to go for a swim.
23:08I'm hot.
23:09Where?
23:10They put road over the pool to make it a road.
23:12We could play Waffle House, meow.
23:13Mom, down for me it's an iPad game where you own a Waffle Shop run by cats.
23:17And there's a secret shopper who's a bunny rabbit and...
23:20Where's this cup of ear?
23:21Wait.
23:22It's illegal to go in the DR.
23:23There's aliens in there.
23:24They suck your brains out your nose.
23:26Come on.
23:27It'll be way faster.
23:30What if there's men, men?
23:31Come on, Cherry.
23:32Hurry up, Cherry.
23:38Ma'am, we're going to cop an earful if Mom knows it'll come here.
23:45Oh, deadly!
23:46What?
23:47What?
23:48Cool!
23:55So, Mr Houlihan, we are trying to...
23:57Oi, Chicken Dickens.
23:58Where were you on Sunday night?
24:00Don't say you were filming Jason's TV show because we know you weren't.
24:03Yeah, enough.
24:03You've been spying on me again.
24:05You're obsessed.
24:06Stalker.
24:07Coming back for more.
24:08Oh, Mr Houlihan...
24:10Cut it out.
24:10Get you one golf job in 1995, okay?
24:12Get over it.
24:13It wasn't even good.
24:14I'll spit on your dick afterwards.
24:15Okay.
24:16We know that you weren't filming on Sunday night because there is a list of people who are
24:19filming on Sunday and that list does not include your name.
24:23Your real name.
24:23Or your potato nickname.
24:25What do you do for Jason Wade?
24:28Mr Houlihan.
24:29I know what he does.
24:30He bumps off Don Darrell's,
24:32chops them up into little pieces like an octopus on a teppanyaki grill
24:35so Jason Wade can take over Bespes' stretch of river and expand their universal cocks.
24:39No.
24:40You're talking out your wimp.
24:41Come on.
24:42It's the only job he can get.
24:43Look at that face.
24:43No one's going to put her on the telly, are they?
24:45It's like drop carbonara.
24:46Well, fuck you.
24:47All right.
24:48Okay.
24:48You suck my dick.
24:49No, you suck my dick.
24:50Yes.
24:52Thank you for your precious time, Mr Houlihan.
24:55Eddie, we're done here.
24:56What?
24:56No, we're not done.
24:57Boom.
24:57Collins, we're not...
24:58Boom, boom, boom.
25:00Oi!
25:01Collins, why are we done?
25:02It's not Spud.
25:08Well, like Leo said, our suspect in the chomp costume would have to be at least 5'9 to see
25:12out the mouth bit.
25:14How tall are you?
25:15Six foot.
25:16Our suspect would have to come up to at least here, and you and Spud were eye to eye and
25:22only came up to here.
25:23To the height.
25:25Spud's not our chomp.
25:26Fuck!
25:29Spud, madman's in the brain!
25:32You!
25:33Yeah!
25:35Oi!
25:36You could point it out the fuckin' back.
25:38I was told to drop it in the blue station.
25:40What's that say?
25:41Fuckin' blue station.
25:42Yeah, have a look, it looks like shit.
25:43Have a look through it, might get a Christmas present.
25:45You better not have taken anything outta there.
25:47What's that supposed to mean?
25:49You know what I mean.
25:51Hi, man.
25:52Howdy.
25:52I'm still alive.
25:53He's got a laugh wax.
25:54Righto, right.
25:55He paid you for that shit.
25:56See you met Eddie's dad?
25:58What?
25:59That's a hair.
26:00Yeah.
26:01Oh, that makes so much sense, man.
26:05Uh, Pat, can you get Luke to go through this?
26:08Look, I'm not exactly sure where Luke is, but to be honest, I'm not upset about it.
26:13Don't stress that.
26:14I can help.
26:15What am I looking for in here?
26:16I wear a motor blade type weapon.
26:18No problems.
26:20Ow!
26:21Oh, I've got a slip disc.
26:22I can help you, man.
26:24I can...
26:24Hey, Ellie!
26:26Are you done at the donger?
26:27Yes, Lauren.
26:28I was done at the donger hours ago.
26:30Okay, well, we've got the pelvis and we're going back to the city.
26:33Do you need a lift?
26:33Of course I need a lift, Lauren.
26:35I don't have a fucking car.
26:39Okay, I'll look at the body parts when I get access to the lab and then I'll see if Toby
26:43shut out the tow and then I'll go into debt renting my own car so I can come back here
26:47tomorrow, okay?
26:48Okay, great.
26:49Abby, but they are driving off without you again.
26:51Oh, fuck me, Dad!
26:53Wait!
26:55Oh!
26:56Wait!
26:57Wait!
26:58Hi.
26:58Oh!
26:59Fucking tunnel web in line.
27:00Good Lord, Leo.
27:02Arsehole tunneling is right in my brain.
27:03Sorry, I...
27:03I did loud stomping.
27:05Turns out you were wrong before about that land grab motor.
27:08Ow!
27:08That slip disc!
27:10Pinches in the bar!
27:11I'm fine.
27:12Is it sorting?
27:13I like sorting.
27:14Sure.
27:14Text for Mickey.
27:16Oh, did you?
27:17How'd you get your number?
27:18Okay, fine.
27:18Did you...
27:19You gave it to her?
27:21What?
27:21No, shut your hold.
27:22No, she just texted to say that Isaac found the dick bum in Stonkers territory.
27:28Mate, that's 30 k's upstream.
27:34Where the fuck is it?
27:35I know as much as you, Eddie.
27:37Remember how Eddie said that a possible motive for Jason Wade was wanting Don's land?
27:41Collins, did you take my very special map?
27:43No, no, I didn't take your special soggy foot map.
27:46So, Leo, Spud was a dead end, but you said that there were three staff left on the list.
27:51Yes, but this is bad.
27:52Nah, I'm gonna check the other bins.
27:53So, I started looking into land titles, which led me to Crownland, which is a wild concept
27:57that I will podcast about if this goes to show up.
27:59Hey, can I just get the highlights reel on that one, Leo?
28:01Don and Jason's properties don't neighbour each other.
28:04There is another piece of land betwixt them.
28:06Mm-hmm, yep.
28:07It's called the DRR, Dirks River Reserve.
28:09It used to be military land, but reverted to Crownland in 2008.
28:12Okay, so, oh my god.
28:14This is bigger.
28:15This one's bigger, Eddie.
28:16Pat, have you seen my map?
28:17It's got a really fun maze on it.
28:19Five years ago, a native title claim was submitted for the DRR.
28:22Soon after, Don lodged a challenge because he wanted that land.
28:25Right.
28:26Yeah, which means that Don is in a land dispute, just not with Jason Wade.
28:30Uh-huh.
28:30So, Eddie, you were kind of right.
28:31Stop talking.
28:33I'm putting a pin to you.
28:34Right, come and have a look at this.
28:35I've been thinking about where the body parts were found.
28:38Have a squeeze of this.
28:39Here is where the arm was found.
28:41That's Goliath's territory.
28:42Okay.
28:42The head was here in Titan's patch.
28:45The foot was more downstream, where Monster is.
28:47But the dick bump, the dick bump,
28:49that was found all the way up here in Stonkers territory.
28:53Our killer's chopped up old mate, then they've taken their busted boat
28:56and was going from crock hole to crock hole,
28:58feeding Don to the bulls.
29:00Whoever killed Don, they know this river,
29:02and they know these crocks.
29:09Leah, who is Don in the land dispute with?
29:12The Dungle Lava Corporation.
29:17Yes, a rabbit.
29:18I wasn't really happy only doing the tourist thing,
29:20and then Lynn offered me this job, and I was like,
29:22yes, it's important to be part of the community
29:24and to contribute to it, isn't it, Rabbit?
29:27Hello, I'm Kath.
29:28What can I get you?
29:30Yeah?
29:31Yeah, okay.
29:32Yeah.
29:33Oh, here they are.
29:34Table for 36?
29:35No, 35.
29:37The last one to the fucking cops.
29:46Al, do you have any alternative coverings?
29:49A shirt, a poncho of some sort?
29:52I only have the John costume and it's too hot.
29:54They give me swamp nuts.
29:55Right.
29:56Yeah, right.
29:57Well, that's best avoided.
29:59Hey, how long will this take?
30:00I'm on a date with Roisin right now.
30:03We'll see.
30:04When was the last time you saw Don Daryl?
30:06Mmm, I don't know.
30:07A couple of weeks ago maybe?
30:08Sorry guys.
30:09Sorry.
30:09Sorry to interrupt.
30:10I've just got to get in here and heat my heat pack up from the back.
30:14Leo's helping with the weapon search now.
30:16Sorry, why?
30:18Man, I'm just getting zings down the leg.
30:20Would you say...
30:24Would you say that you and Don Daryl are friendly?
30:27Nah.
30:28Don was always yelling at someone or something.
30:30Doesn't surprise me someone killed him.
30:33He was a prick.
30:35Wait.
30:36Why are you asking me?
30:38Oh, smells like Luke's microwave tuna.
30:42I'll tell you, that is not socialised, right?
30:45What adult sucks yoghurt from a pouch?
30:48I mean, you know, very weird.
30:51Anyway, I'll get out of your hair.
30:53You're looking good, Al.
30:56Al, we know your family was involved in a land dispute with Don Daryl for ages, yeah?
31:00Says here it's been in court for five years.
31:02Five years?
31:03That is a long time.
31:04We've been waiting longer than that to get our land back.
31:07Fair enough.
31:09So Al, where were you last Sunday night at 11.30pm?
31:13I was at home.
31:14Really?
31:14Because this photo here was taken from a drone that was filming out at Don's Donger at that time.
31:20This is Don, and we think that the person in the chump costume is you.
31:24That could be anyone.
31:25Well, no.
31:26The person here has a boat that's leaking fuel.
31:28We know that your boat is busted because your niece Cherry said she put dog biscuits in the fuel tank.
31:33You're also one of only two land of crockstaff that are tall enough for the chump costumes.
31:38You and a Roisin.
31:42Roisin.
31:42Roisin.
31:43Sheen.
31:43Last name.
31:44So, was it you or Mr Sheen?
31:47Look, it's not what it looks like.
31:49Really?
31:49Because what it looks like is you dragging a very dead Don Daryl up the jetty towards the doner.
31:53No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no.
31:55He wasn't dead.
31:55Okay.
31:56I was out in the river and then I saw him struggling to get out of his boat because he
32:00was shit-faced.
32:01Okay.
32:01Full horrors.
32:02So I helped him inside.
32:03So you didn't kill him?
32:04Cut him up?
32:05Beat him with the bull quarks like some kind of demon river santa?
32:07No, he was alive when I left him.
32:09Why were you on the river then?
32:10I was out there for special king tide cultural business.
32:13Oh, okay.
32:14Yeah.
32:14In your chump costume.
32:16Yeah, I was stuck in it and there was no one left that worked to help me.
32:18Well, yesterday at the Crocosphere, Jason Wade said no one knows this river and it's crocs like Al.
32:25Exactly.
32:25If I was a murderer, which I'm not, I'd never dump a body in a river where 4,000 fish
32:29have been released for the beshnanza.
32:31Crocs won't eat some old dead fella when there's fresh barret to eat.
32:34They're as smart as a chicken, but they have standards.
32:36I'm right, aren't I?
32:38None of Don's body parts are even eaten, eh?
32:41And yeah, my boat's busted up and it's leaking.
32:43But any fuel trail will lead from Don's jetty back to where I tie up near the creepy tree with
32:47the face.
32:48Cause after I got that racist prick into the donger, I went home and I watched TV.
32:53I am sorry, I have to take this.
32:56What did you watch on the telly then?
32:58Chronics.
32:59About the Jamaican bobsled team.
33:00Can anyone verify that?
33:02The plot?
33:02Yes.
33:04Superintendent.
33:04Don't look away, Deb.
33:06You don't want to miss it.
33:08Sorry detective, I'm just down here at Mendel Beach watching the sunset with the in-laws.
33:12Have you been?
33:13No, no, I haven't.
33:14Oh, you're good to go.
33:15Look, I'm not religious, but this is my church.
33:17It's spectacular.
33:19It's...
33:20Anyway, Jason Wade's been in touch.
33:23He's rapable about his staff being questioned while they're on the job today.
33:26Ah, yeah, I did not think that he recognised me.
33:29Well, these boys must have reported back.
33:31He's called all the higher ups too.
33:33So, do you have something on Jason?
33:35Because if you do, I'll absolutely be back here.
33:38But...
33:38No.
33:39No, we don't.
33:40We were following a line of inquiry that involved him, but...
33:44Recent developments suggest that neither Jason nor his staff had anything to do with Don's homicide.
33:50Oh, okay.
33:51I'll report back to HQ and put out some fires, because currently Wade's clamped onto you and
33:55he doesn't want to let go until you've got no career left.
33:57Oh.
33:58Oh, that's super duper news.
33:59Yeah, look, detective, I know we've only just met, and I'm not across what happened
34:03in Tassie, but I do need to be kept in the loop with all this.
34:06Communication is kindness, as my daughter Alice says, right before she sledges my footwear.
34:11Yes, of course, Superintendent.
34:13Oh, look, Deadlock wasn't the best reflection of my professional standards.
34:18Mistakes were made.
34:19Yeah, well, I know you're diligent.
34:21I've seen your handwriting.
34:22I thought it was typed.
34:23Uh, but from all reports, Detective Rickliff doesn't share your respect for protocol.
34:28Look, Bernie, we're nearly there.
34:30Keep them on it.
34:30Well, obviously there's a chain of command.
34:32Now, Rickliff directing Sergeant Ferguson, the conductive premises, says today that wasn't
34:37great.
34:38I mean, the fact that he found something's irrelevant.
34:40Here we go.
34:41So, sorry, Eddie did what?
34:46Do you know how unprofessional and foolish you made me look in front of the superintendent?
34:51You should have told me, Eddie.
34:52I'm telling you now, okay?
34:54I've got a little property search.
34:55There you go.
34:55For what purpose?
34:56But Frank's been up to his old tricks again, hasn't he?
34:58I wouldn't know, Eddie.
35:00Frank's shitty he was up to six months ago with me and Bush, you put him away.
35:03I'm sorry, what?
35:04You put your dad away?
35:06What, was he involved in a homicide?
35:08No, yes.
35:08Yes, it was a fucking homicide to me, okay?
35:10And when I saw my roommates in that call room last night, I knew, I knew he was doing
35:14it again.
35:14Doing what, Eddie?
35:16Poaching wild crocs, Collins, okay?
35:18Selling their bits on the black market and make fucking erection powders and little morbid wind
35:21chimes and shit, but don't take my word for a cum look.
35:23No!
35:24Frank poaching crocs might be illegal, but it is not relevant to Don Darrell.
35:27So I've been working our actual case, Eddie, but you, you've been having covert conversations.
35:31You've been unlawfully discharging weapons, requesting searches behind my back.
35:36You know, I knew when I saw him out here the other day.
35:38I fucking knew.
35:38I should've tweaked then.
35:39I should've fucking tweaked.
35:40When those pub witches let me out and I saw his scooter, I should've booked him.
35:43Behold.
35:44Frank's craven, fucking black market crocodile empire.
35:49Yeah.
35:49It's a shock, isn't it?
35:53Nah, there was fucking crocs in here.
35:57He's poaching again.
35:59Look at all that treasure.
36:01Let's go.
36:02Guys, I found a microphone.
36:04Wait, can I have this?
36:05Yes.
36:06Can I have this too?
36:07Yeah.
36:07Yeah, go ahead.
36:08Wear red.
36:09Come on, let's go.
36:09Come on, your mum.
36:10Hey, this microphone still works.
36:12Give that to me.
36:13I've got to make this off for one of us.
36:21I swear, I swear, there were four crocs in here, stepped up.
36:25One of them had no head.
36:25It was three, four wild salties.
36:27No head, huh?
36:29He's moving.
36:30Oh, Wayne, Eddie.
36:31I fucking can't just move.
36:32He's been on our river search all day, Eddie.
36:35We do not have time for this.
36:37Put him in the shed.
36:39Hey, you two.
36:40I got a new job.
36:42And my tip's out.
36:43I'm Lynce Barwin.
36:44Tasha, have you seen my old man?
36:45Last two second from the end, puts 20 bucks down for a round.
36:47Oh my god, that's your dad?
36:49No, no, he just took a call and left.
36:51Fuck.
36:51Someone's tipped him off about Moonboot.
36:53Okay, we have to get to his place.
36:54No.
36:55No, we have our own case and clearly someone else went out to the donger after our left.
36:59So, I need you here not fixating on your dad.
37:01No, I am not going to let him poach one more of those magical creatures, okay?
37:04It's like you're following a Moorman.
37:06I found something in the river drunk.
37:08I left it on your desk.
37:10Please tell me it's our motor blade weapon.
37:12No, it's not.
37:12Senior Collins, it's nothing.
37:14We're in his ass.
37:15Come on backpack, you're driving to Franks.
37:16Collins, check the river drunk.
37:17It's impasse, Eddie.
37:18It's impasse.
37:20And leave your dad alone.
37:24Bang it, Liam.
37:25Come on.
37:25If you see a buffalo, just smash through it.
37:27They don't belong here.
37:28I'm not smashing through a buffalo.
37:29Mentors.
37:29I'm mentoring you to go faster.
37:31Well, I'm driving the speed limit.
37:32Fuck the speed limit.
37:33This is a clock emergency.
37:35I'm not fucking the speed limit.
37:36Go up his driveway.
37:39All right.
37:40Bang it up here, Leo.
37:41Hey, there he is.
37:42Car brake.
37:43Tokyo drifted.
37:44I don't know what drifting is.
37:45Hang on.
37:45Now, I'll run.
37:46Stop the car.
37:47I'm gonna run.
37:47You're slower than a turtle doing a shit.
37:49Mr. Michaelis first dismount.
37:51Dismount the scooter.
37:52Frank.
37:53Frank, don't talk to him.
37:54This is private property.
37:55Where's your work?
37:56Ah, there.
37:57There's your fucking man.
37:58What have you got for me, Moonboot?
37:59Um, it's just over here.
38:02Why can't you just do something normal for a living like everybody else's dad?
38:05Be a baker or a butcher or a fucking regional manager.
38:09What do you want about girls?
38:10I saw the crocs in the cool room.
38:12You're up to your poaching shit again.
38:14I didn't poach any crocs.
38:16It was a stitcher.
38:17Oh, bullshit.
38:18All right.
38:19What have you got for me, Moonboot?
38:21What's he hiding out here, huh?
38:22What did you find?
38:27What the fuck is that?
38:54Oh, shit.
38:55Half-assed job.
38:56Ah.
38:57I can't even dig up proper fucking hole.
39:01What have you got buried in here, eh?
39:02Croc heads, croc tails, croc dicks, croc nuts, eh?
39:06What are you trying to hide?
39:08Here we fucking go.
39:09I've struck croc bone here.
39:10What's this?
39:10Hang on.
39:11What is that?
39:13This is Detective Dolsey Collins at Barrow Creek Police Station.
39:17We found a police issue handgun with two rounds missing.
39:20We're just hoping to identify the owner.
39:22Serial number V-8-6-4-6-3-November.
39:39What is this, Frank?
39:41Did you chop and chuck Don Daryl?
39:44Did ya?
39:45Jinx?
39:45Alex?
39:54Thanks.
40:05. . . .
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