- 20 ore fa
Why Alex Hormozi deleted this interview with Tony Robbins?
He sat face to face to the biggest name in personal development history. The one that has been doing this work since Alex was in diapers. And for about an hour, he let himself get coached in a way he probably hasn't been coached in years...
Maybe, for the first time in years, someone showed him a truth he couldn't translate into reality: the trauma that made him successful is also what's draining him. Many high achievers live with inside an invisible belief: «If I stop suffering, I will lose my edge».
So they sacrifice everthing: joy, presence, relationships... to continue «Performing», believing that pain is the price of success.
⏱ TIMESTAMPS
---
00:00 Introduction
00:24 Tony's Impact on Alex
02:49 How Words Program Your Emotions
05:48 Push vs Pull Motivation
09:44 How Success Kills Enjoyment
11:03 Why Helping People Stops Feeling Meaningful
12:08 “F*** Happiness”
13:13 What Happens After You “Walk On The Moon”?
16:17 The Psychology Of Unreasonable Goals
19:34 Why Writing Checks Doesn’t Create Fulfillment
21:14 Getting Emotionally Associated With Impact
22:13 “Get Off Your Emotional Ass”
23:46 Why High Performers Feel Stressed
25:20 Why Environment Changes You Faster Than Logic
27:57 “Find A Goal Worth Suffering For”
30:20 Naming Your Modes
31:52 Choosing Who Runs Your Life
35:47 Why The Brain Reduces And The Heart Magnifies
38:09 Tony’s Negotiation Story
42:19 The Fastest Mental Rewire
46:26 Why Charity Doesn’t “Work” If You Don’t Care
47:13 How To Choose Opportunities When You Have Too Many
49:47 How To Find a Partner
51:12 The Science Of Achievement
53:13 The Only Thing Alex Feels Deeply Connected To
55:31 Ownership, Not Wages: The Real Escape From Fear
1:05:19 The Richest Alex Ever Felt
1:07:24 Tony's Challenge For Alex
He sat face to face to the biggest name in personal development history. The one that has been doing this work since Alex was in diapers. And for about an hour, he let himself get coached in a way he probably hasn't been coached in years...
Maybe, for the first time in years, someone showed him a truth he couldn't translate into reality: the trauma that made him successful is also what's draining him. Many high achievers live with inside an invisible belief: «If I stop suffering, I will lose my edge».
So they sacrifice everthing: joy, presence, relationships... to continue «Performing», believing that pain is the price of success.
⏱ TIMESTAMPS
---
00:00 Introduction
00:24 Tony's Impact on Alex
02:49 How Words Program Your Emotions
05:48 Push vs Pull Motivation
09:44 How Success Kills Enjoyment
11:03 Why Helping People Stops Feeling Meaningful
12:08 “F*** Happiness”
13:13 What Happens After You “Walk On The Moon”?
16:17 The Psychology Of Unreasonable Goals
19:34 Why Writing Checks Doesn’t Create Fulfillment
21:14 Getting Emotionally Associated With Impact
22:13 “Get Off Your Emotional Ass”
23:46 Why High Performers Feel Stressed
25:20 Why Environment Changes You Faster Than Logic
27:57 “Find A Goal Worth Suffering For”
30:20 Naming Your Modes
31:52 Choosing Who Runs Your Life
35:47 Why The Brain Reduces And The Heart Magnifies
38:09 Tony’s Negotiation Story
42:19 The Fastest Mental Rewire
46:26 Why Charity Doesn’t “Work” If You Don’t Care
47:13 How To Choose Opportunities When You Have Too Many
49:47 How To Find a Partner
51:12 The Science Of Achievement
53:13 The Only Thing Alex Feels Deeply Connected To
55:31 Ownership, Not Wages: The Real Escape From Fear
1:05:19 The Richest Alex Ever Felt
1:07:24 Tony's Challenge For Alex
Categoria
📚
ApprendimentoTrascrizione
00:00:02It's not every day you get to interview Tony Robbins, and so I figured I could either make this a
00:00:06headline driven algorithm podcast or just spend an hour and a half asking the questions that mattered most to me.
00:00:13So I did the second one. Enjoy.
00:00:24Tony Robbins, strategist to some of the most important people in the world, people that you have seen publicly and
00:00:30probably many more that you haven't seen privately that have impacted your life. And he's both a wealth strategist, but
00:00:37also a life strategist. And so we're talking politicians, royal families, US presidents, Margaret Thatcher, Princess Diana, Andre Agassi.
00:00:45Mike Tyson, just the greats. And he's also published books. He's got 100 plus companies in his portfolio that do
00:00:53north of seven plus billion a year. And as impressive as that is, it's actually 12 billion. There you go.
00:00:59I was, I was going to say, I was like, I hope this number isn't wrong. I like looked all
00:01:02over the internet. Most importantly, at least for me, me personally, is that you wrote books that changed my life
00:01:09directly. And in a couple of cool ways. So the first is there was an Indian guy who came here
00:01:15to the
00:01:15US 20 something years ago, and he was working as a janitor. And he had such a thick accent that
00:01:20they said, you're never going to get employed anywhere. You have to learn how to speak. And he tried to
00:01:24get, you know, how to get rid of an Indian accent tapes. And those didn't really exist. And so they
00:01:28were like, well, you can check out these from the public library. And it was Tony Robbins tapes.
00:01:31And so he would just mop the floors listening to Awake the Giant Within. Sorry, I'm messing up. Thank you.
00:01:39Yes. And so he's mopping the floors and he's doing it. And that man then started a software company, scaled
00:01:46that, sold it, started another company, sold that for 3.4 billion, did another company, took that from 200 to
00:01:511.2 billion. And I met him right around that time. And he's my partner at acquisition.com.
00:01:55Wow, that's beautiful. And so that's the first impact. What's his name?
00:01:58Sharan Srivatsa. Please give him my best. That's awesome. I will. He's, you would be here if you didn't have
00:02:03to. Oh, he's the man. The second direct impact is that there was a girl in Michigan who was 100
00:02:09pounds overweight, had just been arrested six times just in the first couple years of college. And then was like,
00:02:15I need to change my life. And started listening to your tapes and reading your books, lost 100 pounds, competed
00:02:22in a fitness competition, and then got into business, built a whole roster of clients for herself. And that's when
00:02:26I met my wife.
00:02:27Oh, that makes me the most happy. Congratulations.
00:02:31The one that most significantly impacted my life.
00:02:33Well, that's the most important part of your life. Of course. That's wonderful.
00:02:35And then the third was me, obviously. And my actually entry into your world was Money Master the Game. That
00:02:41was the book that got me. And so for that reason, I want to say thank you for just everything
00:02:45you do.
00:02:46Well, thank you for all the kind words. I really appreciate it.
00:02:48I actually had like five words written down for this whole podcast.
00:02:51Okay.
00:02:52And I tried to compress a bunch of questions into just the most succinct thing.
00:02:56That was actually top of mind for me that I know will be top of mind for many of the
00:02:59business owners in my audience.
00:03:00So I have probably 60% business owner audience. A third of them are doing over a million a year.
00:03:04We also have people who are just, you know, just getting started, but a lot of people are predominantly business.
00:03:08There's my brothers and sisters out there. Yours and mine, right?
00:03:10Yeah, in the game.
00:03:11In the game.
00:03:11We all do the same game.
00:03:12Bet on yourself and grow, right? Find a way to give.
00:03:14Yes. And so the first one was, how do you see the dichotomy between duty and enjoyment
00:03:23as it relates to the impact that you want to make with the business that you have?
00:03:29Well, it's interesting. You know, words are tricky. They can produce emotions.
00:03:33And sometimes we pick up words because the people are around.
00:03:36I used to play poker with a group of guys when I was in like 19, 20, 21, and they
00:03:41were older than I was.
00:03:42And they were all married except one. And I was surprised to see one day, well, one of them guys,
00:03:49I knew he loved his wife so much. But two of the other guys who always were talking about their
00:03:54wives,
00:03:54like I had to go back to the old ball and chain, you know? And one day, and I couldn't
00:03:58help see it.
00:03:58It was like, I was a witness of it because I was always sensitive to this.
00:04:02And the guy that really loves his wife, out of habit of being one of the guys,
00:04:05yeah, I'm going on my own ball and chain, right? And the language we use produces emotion.
00:04:11And sometimes we can pick up words and actually pick up emotions without notice.
00:04:15It's just like, you know, if somebody yawns, you yawn too, or somebody starts to laugh, you do it.
00:04:18But words are even more powerful. So duty could be a good word, like if you're seeing yourself like a
00:04:24soldier, right?
00:04:26But I don't look at it that way. I look at it as...
00:04:29Obligation?
00:04:29No, I don't look at obligation. It's the same thing.
00:04:32No, it's okay. But I say this because I saw this in some of your language.
00:04:35And I don't know if this is helpful to you. I don't pretend to coach you in any way.
00:04:39But for me, at least, I can tell you, I look at it as opportunity.
00:04:43I don't feel a sense of duty. I feel a sense of joy in being able to contribute.
00:04:48To me, contribution is what we're made for.
00:04:50Like, it's not hard to meet your own needs as a human being, right?
00:04:53It's not that difficult today in the world we're in today.
00:04:55But to have a fulfilling life, you have to have something you care about more than yourself.
00:05:00And so if you get into business just to make money, there's nothing wrong with that.
00:05:03Those people usually, you know, even if they succeed, they hit a limit of fulfillment
00:05:07because the economic returns only produce so much.
00:05:11So I don't look at duty and enjoyment.
00:05:13I look at it as more like it's all enjoyment because contribution is the ultimate enjoyment for me.
00:05:18I mean, I get into business for impact and economics are second.
00:05:21If I have enough impact, you'll never have to worry about economics in your life.
00:05:25And I found that to be true in my own life.
00:05:26So I don't look at it quite that way.
00:05:28I look at it also, though, that if you think you're going to really enjoy your life and not do
00:05:32anything,
00:05:33I think you're deluded because you'll wake up one day.
00:05:35Because the only thing that makes us feel alive is growth.
00:05:38You know, when you grow, then you have something to give.
00:05:41And when you give, then your life is more meaningful than just, you know, pleasure.
00:05:44You can give yourself pleasure by, you know, money, food, alcohol, sex, whatever it is, you know.
00:05:50But it's never going to be the same as when you have something that's larger than you that you're called
00:05:54to.
00:05:54It's like, I hate the word motivation because I've never been a motivator, but people use the word.
00:05:58So I'll say, well, there's two types of motivation if you don't think of it that way.
00:06:01There's push motivation, which is, let's say, duty or I've got to do this or I have to do it
00:06:06or obligation, right?
00:06:08Or just, I'm going to make this happen.
00:06:10And look, brother, you have a huge amount of willpower.
00:06:13It's pretty obvious by what you've accomplished.
00:06:15I have tremendous respect for you.
00:06:16And I do too.
00:06:18But willpower only goes so far.
00:06:20That's push.
00:06:21Pull motivation is where there's something out there that you want to serve more than yourself that'll get you up
00:06:26early, keep you up late.
00:06:27And it isn't hard.
00:06:29It isn't duty.
00:06:29It is like what I'm made for.
00:06:32When you tap into that, your energy level will explode.
00:06:36Your contribution will explode.
00:06:37So it doesn't mean overnight everything is going to work your way.
00:06:39Of course it doesn't work that way.
00:06:40But it will give you the constant endurance to move forward in a way in which you enjoy your life
00:06:45rather than someday when I get to this number, then I'm slowly going to feel good.
00:06:49Because it's not true.
00:06:50You get to the number and if it's numbers, it'll never be enough.
00:06:53As you know that, you've done incredibly well.
00:06:56I have so many friends that they've got their business, they sold it, they made a billion two, whatever it
00:07:00is.
00:07:02Five months later, they're looking to get back in business again because so many of their needs were met by
00:07:06the demands and the challenges and the growing.
00:07:08I think the biggest problem we have as human beings is that we think we shouldn't have any.
00:07:13It's like problems make you grow.
00:07:15Problems call to you because, listen, you lift.
00:07:18We're both in good shape.
00:07:18You wouldn't be there if you lifted lightweights and did 100 curls with some lightweight, right?
00:07:23You're built.
00:07:24You've built this body.
00:07:25You've built it by challenging it.
00:07:27But some people, maybe because of your background in the fitness industry, no pain, no gain.
00:07:32But today we know that's not true.
00:07:33We know today that minimum dose will produce the maximum result.
00:07:37If you overdo it, you tear down too much, right?
00:07:40It's like finding the right dose just like anything else, like a drug for somebody.
00:07:43And so I really think if you think you're going to just go off and enjoy your life and not
00:07:48add value, you're going to be deluded.
00:07:50You're going to be frustrated.
00:07:51You're going to – I mean, how many people do you know that were rich and famous and the world
00:07:55loved and they killed themselves?
00:07:58Yeah.
00:07:59Because they stopped growing.
00:08:00I give this to half a dozen people I've thought of in the last 10 years that have done that
00:08:04process.
00:08:04So I think to me it's not duty.
00:08:06But I do believe those much is given, much is expected.
00:08:10It's one of my favorite parts in the whole Bible.
00:08:11Oh, really?
00:08:12I come from that place too.
00:08:13But to me the expectation is a pleasure.
00:08:16I think the language we use trains our brain.
00:08:19It's like if you said to me – if I said to you, during the break here, let's have some
00:08:23nutritious snacks.
00:08:24I said that to a mass audience, maybe for you to respond positively because you're fit.
00:08:28But most people are like, eh.
00:08:29But if I say delicious snacks, they're interested.
00:08:31Or someone says to me, Tony, you meet so many people.
00:08:34Hook me up.
00:08:35Introduce me to a great guy, a great woman.
00:08:37And if I said to them, well, I know this guy or I know this woman, they're really nice.
00:08:45Versus they're sensual, they're sexy, they're amazing, they're delicious.
00:08:49It's a different piece.
00:08:50They're not nutritious people.
00:08:51But you see what I mean?
00:08:52The words change your biochemistry.
00:08:55The words you attach to an experience become your experience.
00:08:59If you over and over use certain words, you won't even know it and you'll train yourself to have certain
00:09:03– what I call an emotional home.
00:09:05Certain emotions you go back to because the language takes you there.
00:09:08And duty and responsibility, if you're trained like a soldier, that might work.
00:09:13If you've trained yourself that no pain, no gain, that might work.
00:09:17But how old do you now, may I ask?
00:09:1836.
00:09:19Okay.
00:09:19At 36 years old, you've built such a foundation of business, of contribution, of wealth, of your body, that at
00:09:27this stage, it shouldn't be pain.
00:09:29It shouldn't be suffering.
00:09:29I don't think it has to be any of those things.
00:09:31I think it can be total joy, but you have to kind of rewire your brain because otherwise that past
00:09:36training conditions you, in my opinion.
00:09:39Does that make any sense?
00:09:40Yes.
00:09:41And I will just speak for me.
00:09:44Yes.
00:09:45The issue that I have is that I got here from a push and anger, for sure.
00:09:50Yes, yeah.
00:09:51But I think in the last however many years, I genuinely believe that's not as much a part of me.
00:09:56Maybe there's elements of that that are still there, but it's not the core drive anymore.
00:10:00Sure, me too.
00:10:01But the difficulty that I have is like, I work the hours that I'm awake, pretty much.
00:10:05Yeah.
00:10:06And the difficulty that I have is finding enjoyment outside of work.
00:10:11And the contribution from that perspective, like I've spoken to a number of billionaires, yourself included, where I'm like, the
00:10:18next game, right?
00:10:20And so, the game that we're in right now, I know, obviously, there's going to be risks.
00:10:24There's going to be lots of things that we're going to do.
00:10:53But I feel like I have a direction of what I know what we're doing.
00:11:23Yeah.
00:11:25We're going through our process, losing weight, getting off medications, whatever.
00:11:28Maybe the first couple of months, it felt like something.
00:11:29But then on like the hundredth and the thousandth, I was like, well, yeah, you know, of course, you stopped.
00:11:34You moved better and you stopped eating shit and it worked out.
00:11:36You know, you know, like it just, it's not basically the magic was gone for me.
00:11:41Yes.
00:11:42And so, to the same degree, that's, I would say, it has occurred within what I do today, but I
00:11:48don't even feel in some ways that I am driven.
00:11:50I do this because I don't know what else to do.
00:11:53It's like, this is the only thing I'm good at.
00:11:55Yeah.
00:11:55And so, I do what I've been rewarded for doing.
00:11:58The biggest thing selfishly that I was like really, or I am, you know, looking forward to, is I'm trying
00:12:03to navigate that.
00:12:04I understand.
00:12:04So, it's almost, you've got a set point on your fulfillment and you're not going beyond it.
00:12:08Yes.
00:12:09When I was 20, I got obsessed with positive psychology.
00:12:12I read, I had a trunk of books and every single one of them, we saw, felt things like this
00:12:16early on, before I had a business, any of that stuff.
00:12:18And I got to a point where I realized I had read all the books and my life hadn't changed.
00:12:21Yeah.
00:12:22And it felt very hopeless for me because my subjective well-being was the same.
00:12:26And so, I came up with a mantra for myself, which you might laugh at, which was fuck happiness.
00:12:30Because I felt so rejected by the notion because I felt so unattainable for me.
00:12:33And so, what I replaced it with was I will be useful.
00:12:35That's great.
00:12:36Meaningful, a meaningful life is a very useful life, right?
00:12:39And that's basically what I've oriented my entire life around was like, that's why duty for me feels meaningful.
00:12:44Because it's like, well, you know, I might not enjoy this whole ride, but like, everyone else can get stuff
00:12:49out of it.
00:12:49And so, that's the struggle that I have because like, I'm okay with that.
00:12:54You're okay with it, but you're torn by it, my friend.
00:12:56Yes.
00:12:57No, agreed.
00:12:58That's pretty obvious, right?
00:12:59I will accept that.
00:13:01I understand.
00:13:01You'll accept that.
00:13:02Yes.
00:13:02So, would you accept anything else in your other businesses?
00:13:04Would you accept something that's mediocre compared to what you're capable of?
00:13:07No, of course.
00:13:07Yeah.
00:13:08Okay.
00:13:08So, I'll give you my two cents, which is all it's worth.
00:13:13Unless you stay emotionally associated.
00:13:15The guys, the astronauts, you know, I got to interview several of them, right?
00:13:18Think of that.
00:13:19They went out and they competed.
00:13:20They wanted to be an astronaut, right?
00:13:22You had a version of that.
00:13:24I want to be a business owner, whatever it was you had, right?
00:13:25And they beat everybody, right?
00:13:28Tens of thousands of people.
00:13:29They got down to 100, down to 25, down to 6, down to the guys that go to the moon,
00:13:32right?
00:13:33And they get a rocket that's built by the cheapest bidder on their back.
00:13:38And they shot them out into the moon with technology that's far less than it's on your phone right now.
00:13:43And they walk on the moon.
00:13:44They look back and see that image.
00:13:46You and I have seen that they took blue-green of the earth, but that was them seeing it.
00:13:50And they make it back and survive.
00:13:52They splash down.
00:13:53They have a tinker tape parade.
00:13:54They shake the president's hand.
00:13:56Now, what the fuck do you do after you've walked on the moon for adventure?
00:14:00Yeah, right.
00:14:01I guess like you're 35 and you've walked on the moon.
00:14:03What do you do?
00:14:04And most of them became alcoholics and drug addicted.
00:14:07Yeah.
00:14:07And the reason is they forgot how to find that joy or that adventure and a smile.
00:14:12And so you have trained yourself to be pain equals success.
00:14:17And success has a certain amount of value, but fuck happiness.
00:14:20You have literally hypnotized yourself into missing it because you weren't feeling fulfilled.
00:14:24So the idea that these people keep telling you, I would tell you is true.
00:14:28And I'll just give you my own experience.
00:14:29We're not the same person, but maybe it'll be instructive.
00:14:31I don't know.
00:14:32So I don't know.
00:14:33Maybe 10 years I found myself at a place where it's like, I love my life.
00:14:37I couldn't be more fulfilled than this.
00:14:38I have the most incredible wife.
00:14:40I have the most incredible kids.
00:14:41You know, I want to be an athlete and I make it.
00:14:44You know, right behind you, I have like six national championship rings from different
00:14:48teams that I own or that I help to coach and turn around.
00:14:52I'm working with the greatest athletes in the world, the greatest business people in
00:14:55the world.
00:14:55I'm having fun.
00:14:57I'm, you know, I've got homes all over the world.
00:14:58There's nothing that, what else could make me fulfilled?
00:15:01I mean, now this is the it.
00:15:02You know, I can't be anymore and I'm not complaining.
00:15:04But then there's some part of me like you that was hungry for more still.
00:15:08You wouldn't be asking me that question unless there was part of you that wants a hunger for
00:15:11something called happiness or wants something besides just duty or you wouldn't ask me.
00:15:16So, and I'm not telling you I have the answer, but I'll tell you what it was for me.
00:15:19It's like the same these people told you is me.
00:15:22I've always was contributing the same as you.
00:15:24I've been doing it since very little.
00:15:26But I started saying, you know what I'm going to do?
00:15:28I want to do some moonshots in that area.
00:15:30I know how to scale businesses.
00:15:31I've grown businesses from nothing up to 12 billion.
00:15:34It's like in those days it was like 4 billion.
00:15:36Like what, what would really get me going?
00:15:39And at that point I've been feeding people since I was a kid.
00:15:42When I was 11 years old, we had no food on Thanksgiving.
00:15:45Somebody came and delivered food.
00:15:46Changed my life.
00:15:46It made me believe strangers care.
00:15:48So I cared about strangers and I took two families, four families.
00:15:52I got to a million, four million.
00:15:54So about this point I've been feeding people for 37 years.
00:15:57So I called my foundation.
00:15:59How many people have I fed in my lifetime?
00:16:00And they said 42 million.
00:16:02I was like, wow, that's pretty awesome.
00:16:05But I had no association to it.
00:16:07I felt good about it.
00:16:08But I was doing it, you know, all these different ways.
00:16:11I was like, there's so much pain out there.
00:16:14I'm going to feed a billion people in the next 10 years.
00:16:18It took 37 years to do 42 billion.
00:16:20I started out by saying, well, what if I did as many people I've done in my lifetime in the
00:16:24next 10 years?
00:16:25What if I did as many people in my lifetime in one year?
00:16:28And then I was like, what if we did 100 million people in a year?
00:16:31What if we did 100 million people in a year for 10 years and did a billion meals right here
00:16:34in the United States?
00:16:35And I got so ignited by that, Alex, that it was more than, it wasn't money, it wasn't business, it
00:16:42wasn't success, it wasn't, okay, there's a system.
00:16:44It was like, I have to rip apart.
00:16:46If it took me 37 years to do 42 million, to go to a billion is going to require me
00:16:51to think differently, come up with a strategy different, be different.
00:16:53And to think of a billion lives, that number somehow brought a different level of life.
00:16:58It's kind of like Kennedy saying, we're going to go in this decade and we're going to land on the
00:17:02moon and bring a man back to the earth.
00:17:04And all the guys at NASA are like, bullshit, this is not going to happen, right?
00:17:09We don't have technology to do it.
00:17:11I don't care, this is what we're going to do.
00:17:12There's something about building a moonshot for contribution outside of what you've done in business.
00:17:20And I did it, I said I'd do it in 10 years, I did it in eight years.
00:17:23So then I finished that and was like, you know, I'm traveling around the world, you see people starving, it's
00:17:27just trying to do what you're going to do.
00:17:29It's like, no, I need something bigger.
00:17:30So I was in the UAE and I had a lunch with MBZ, the head of the country, brilliant man.
00:17:37And he calls me the next day and goes, I want to have lunch with you again.
00:17:39I'm like, that's cool, I'm not going to do that, right?
00:17:42So I come sit down with him and he goes, I brought you lunch today because there's two people feeding
00:17:46the most people on earth and they should know each other.
00:17:48So he introduced me to Governor Beasley who ran the world food program for the UN, right?
00:17:53So I said, well, I think he's doing more than me.
00:17:55He said, and so we talked, he later won the Nobel prize, but we stayed in relationship.
00:18:00And because of our relationship, he got so frustrated with the bureaucracy of the UN that one day he said,
00:18:06I'm going to leave the UN.
00:18:07Because during his five years, we went from 80 million people at the verge of starvation to 385 million people.
00:18:13I mean, just think of those numbers.
00:18:14You have to think of them.
00:18:15And if you just think of his numbers, it doesn't, but if you follow like one child starving, it'll change
00:18:20the, oh yeah, that system to something more ethereal.
00:18:23It's like watching a movie.
00:18:24Watch a movie about war.
00:18:25It's too much.
00:18:25When you follow one person and what they go through, you feel it.
00:18:28So I got associated with that and I said to him, what if we create a strike force team?
00:18:32If you're going to leave, how many meals would it take to feed everybody in the world for 10 years
00:18:37that need it, where it would give us time to build a sustainable solution?
00:18:41Because you can't keep doing the same crap, right?
00:18:44He goes, Tony, I don't know, 40, 50, 60 billion meals.
00:18:47I said, let's do a 100 billion meal challenge.
00:18:49I said, I did a billion meals.
00:18:51When I started, I wasn't a billionaire.
00:18:52I've been blessed, obviously, since that time.
00:18:54You do great work.
00:18:55If you want to, if you bless others, you'll be blessed, right?
00:18:57I wasn't doing it for that reason.
00:18:59It just came about.
00:18:59So I said, there's got to be 90 and more guys like me in the world.
00:19:04There's 3,000 billionaires or owners of companies or, you know, countries that'll do this.
00:19:10So we did this 100 billion meal challenge and we went to Forbes 400 and I thought, we're going to
00:19:15get 50 of these guys, right?
00:19:16The richest people in the world.
00:19:18Four people stood up.
00:19:20Four.
00:19:20I'm like, this is not working.
00:19:22We're going to do something different.
00:19:23But I won't bore you with all the details.
00:19:25The strategy, the thought process, and what kept me going, though, is it's not just having this unreasonable goal.
00:19:30It's having strong enough emotional reasons.
00:19:33And I got in these environments where people are starving.
00:19:35I got in the Sudan.
00:19:37There were a million people cut off by the rebels there.
00:19:39And they were starving them out.
00:19:40This was just this last year.
00:19:42And the UN sent all these food people in and they killed the drivers and took the food.
00:19:46MBS, not MBZ, MBS from Saudi Arabia cares deeply.
00:19:49He tried to provide things.
00:19:51They killed everybody.
00:19:53So people stopped giving money.
00:19:54These people are going to starve.
00:19:55So I said, no, no, there's something different.
00:19:57I said, I'm just putting a line in the sand.
00:19:59We are going to feed these people.
00:20:00I'm going to provide enough food for a million people in a week who will match me.
00:20:03And I got Ray Dalio to match me.
00:20:04Pretty soon I had 40 million bucks.
00:20:06But how are you going to do it?
00:20:07And this is where it gets so alive.
00:20:10It's like no one else in the world has done it.
00:20:12We're going to do this.
00:20:13Here's what I'm going to do.
00:20:13I'm going to hire a bunch of military contractors.
00:20:16We're going to take C-130s and we're going to take drones.
00:20:20And we're going to deliver the food to the people.
00:20:21We delivered 22,000 meals that month and saved all these people starving to death.
00:20:26So when you do that, your level of fulfillment explodes.
00:20:29What the fuck compared to running a business?
00:20:32It's not even the same.
00:20:33And so I've been hooked on that.
00:20:34So now we've got 62 billion meals in three years, which is beyond anybody ever thought
00:20:39was humanly possible.
00:20:40And so now we're going to do a song with We Are The World.
00:20:42And I got Jimmy Jam, the most successful Grammy guy.
00:20:45And I got everybody you can imagine in the music business all building it together.
00:20:49We just completed our first version of that.
00:20:51But then I'm lucky enough, like you, I'm very blessed.
00:20:54I have a private plane.
00:20:55I have a 737.
00:20:57It burns a lot of carbon.
00:20:58I want to be conscious.
00:20:59How many trees does that burn?
00:21:01It's 3,000 trees a year.
00:21:02I'm like, I'll plant 100 million trees.
00:21:04So not just plant the trees.
00:21:05I'm going to plant 100 million trees.
00:21:06I'm going to work with the farmers.
00:21:08I'm going to show them how to go from making a buck a day to 12 bucks a day by
00:21:11having 12.
00:21:11And I work with a group to do that.
00:21:13It's like, you know, a friend of mine's daughter was kidnapped and put into slavery.
00:21:18You know, just insanity.
00:21:20It happens in America.
00:21:21It happens overseas.
00:21:22And nobody wants to talk about trafficking.
00:21:25But that got me associated to it.
00:21:27We actually helped somebody.
00:21:28And so I went out undercover.
00:21:30I had markings all over my face.
00:21:31They had a makeup person.
00:21:33They had scars on my face.
00:21:34I helped them negotiate these deals with these animals that do this.
00:21:36It's the ugliest thing I've ever seen in my life, but also the most beautiful.
00:21:39But again, I didn't just give money.
00:21:41I didn't just write something.
00:21:42I just didn't put something.
00:21:42I went in the fucking trenches.
00:21:44And I'm sitting there watching these girls go through the worst thing on earth, meaning
00:21:48they're chained to a bed to do eight or ten tricks a day.
00:21:51And then we get them freed.
00:21:53We brought them to this house.
00:21:54They'd never been out there.
00:21:55They're out on the ocean.
00:21:56They're down here playing basketball.
00:21:58They're like, they're changing their lives.
00:22:00And so then I'm hooked.
00:22:00So my wife and I have now funded 72,000.
00:22:03Started with 30,000.
00:22:04As many, I grew up in a town of 30,000 people.
00:22:06I want to free that many children.
00:22:07As big as the city I grew up in.
00:22:09Now we're at 72,000.
00:22:10I'm going tonight.
00:22:11We'll probably raise $5 million tonight.
00:22:12I do matching funds for everybody at the event to do it.
00:22:15So what I'm trying to say to you is, get off your ass.
00:22:18And I love you and I respect you, Alex.
00:22:19I'm not coming from that place.
00:22:20I hope you know where I'm coming from.
00:22:21You've accomplished more than most people dream in their lifetime.
00:22:23And I respect that.
00:22:25But when I say get off your ass, get us off your emotional ass.
00:22:27Stop this fuck happiness shit.
00:22:29And just actually say to yourself, no, I deserve happiness.
00:22:33I'm going to create happiness, but I have to do it differently than I've done it before.
00:22:36I can't just get up and just work because I'm trained to work.
00:22:39I'm not a fucking robot anymore.
00:22:41You're way too smart and you've got way too big a heart.
00:22:44I know you do.
00:22:44I know everybody knows you well.
00:22:46I've seen you with your wife.
00:22:47You're an extraordinary human being.
00:22:49You're not just the guy here who does all these wonderful things.
00:22:52And they do wonderful things for people.
00:22:53You're absolutely right.
00:22:53But you're not connected to it.
00:22:55And you don't have something that you're obsessed about that makes you feel fully alive.
00:22:59You're doing it because you need to.
00:23:01The difference between have to, duty, and get to?
00:23:06That's the difference between rich and poor.
00:23:07And rich and poor is not money.
00:23:09Rich and poor is feeling fully alive.
00:23:12That's rich.
00:23:13Poor is you work your ass off and you have plenty of money and you help all kinds of people,
00:23:17but you don't connect it.
00:23:18And again, I'm not making a judgment.
00:23:19I hope you can feel my heart.
00:23:20It's just, I want more for you.
00:23:22And I knew you wouldn't ask me the damn question when it's true.
00:23:24So it's like, but you need, like, your energy has got to be shifted.
00:23:29You need a kick in the ass.
00:23:31You need to get an environment where you're on fucking fire.
00:23:34And then at that state, you've had that state before, I guarantee you, when you got here.
00:23:38But then you got so caught up in the push, I think you've missed some of the pull for your
00:23:43life.
00:23:43And I think this is not just true of you, it's true of most of us.
00:23:46Why are most people stressed?
00:23:48Like, if you talk to people, it's so stressful people.
00:23:51They're always talking about, I'm so stressed.
00:23:52I'm stressed.
00:23:53I'll tell you why you're stressed.
00:23:54Because you're managing shit.
00:23:56You know, like, you're managing all these great businesses.
00:23:58You're managing all this great money.
00:23:59But you know what?
00:24:00When you manage, it puts you back in survival.
00:24:02Are you going to tell me it's more stressful today than the dark ages?
00:24:05I mean, come on.
00:24:06But what's happened is we have all this we're trying to manage.
00:24:08And we're not made to manage.
00:24:10You've been so successful that now you've hit a set point.
00:24:14And now the only way that set point is people get to a point where they question and they start
00:24:18going,
00:24:18is it worth it or not?
00:24:19But I have to keep doing it.
00:24:21No, sometimes you make a point.
00:24:23You say, no, I'm going to keep doing what I'm doing, but I'm going to be connected to it at
00:24:26a different level.
00:24:26Or I'm going to change paths altogether.
00:24:28Or I'm going to add a path that brings another dimension to me.
00:24:31Those are the places that go.
00:24:32So I'm pretty passionate about this answer.
00:24:35Primarily because you're asking me.
00:24:37Because you're asking a question.
00:24:38It's a very sophisticated question.
00:24:39Most people never ask because they never get to where you are.
00:24:42Right?
00:24:42So you've gotten to a place where you've hit a block.
00:24:44But you're only 37.
00:24:46You're God willing going to have 50 or 60 more years of your life.
00:24:50I don't want you going around doing it out of duty.
00:24:52I don't want you to go around doing it because I have to get up and work.
00:24:55I want you to do it for something else.
00:24:57And so I can't do it for you.
00:24:59But it would be very useful for you to get an environment.
00:25:01I'm not selling you.
00:25:02But there's nothing like being in an environment.
00:25:04I know when Pat Ruddy came to one of our events and he got 15,000, 20,000 people.
00:25:08And he's like, I don't need this stuff.
00:25:10And after an hour, he's like, this is insane.
00:25:12At the end of the night, he said to me, he goes, this is like the seventh game of the
00:25:15NBA championship.
00:25:16Only lasts 12 hours and it goes for four days, right?
00:25:19But without energy enhancement, the brain takes over.
00:25:23All of a sudden, now it's your mind doing it.
00:25:25The reason you're not happy is the mind is leading you.
00:25:27Get in your head, you're dead.
00:25:29Your heart is so big.
00:25:31And I'm not saying that to placate you because I know we have mutual friends.
00:25:35And they all rave about what a generous, incredible guy you are.
00:25:37But I don't see you feeling the level that you have.
00:25:40And I can see part of it is energy.
00:25:42You can execute with your mind so well.
00:25:44You recognize, I'm sure, like I do, pattern systems.
00:25:47You know how to put them in place, get it done.
00:25:50But then there's not the emotional connection.
00:25:52You need a moonshot or two and you need to get connected to the people and see and feel the
00:25:56impact in a new variety.
00:25:58Because otherwise, it's the law of familiarity.
00:26:00You get around anything enough, no matter how good it is, you start taking a little bit for granted.
00:26:06And that's just human nature.
00:26:07That's not you.
00:26:08So you have to wake it up and you've got to get associated.
00:26:11The other thing is, you don't have a kid, do you?
00:26:13No.
00:26:15I'm trying to give you advice, but look, I have five kids and five grandkids.
00:26:18I adopted three kids.
00:26:20I was 24.
00:26:20I married a woman who was 12 years my senior.
00:26:23She married twice before me with kids from each person.
00:26:26I didn't recognize the pattern, you know.
00:26:28But it was one of the best things that happened in my life, even though she wasn't right for me.
00:26:32And I don't think I was right for her, but I made that choice.
00:26:35I ended up with these kids.
00:26:36So I was 24 and had a 17-year-old son instantly, an 11-year-old, a 5-year-old,
00:26:41and the one on the way.
00:26:43I've been doing my thing, like you're doing, very successful.
00:26:46I want to change the world.
00:26:47Now I've got to figure out all these kids in different stages of life.
00:26:49And so I tell you that because that marriage wasn't the right marriage, but those kids are now, you know,
00:26:54my youngest kid is like 42, right?
00:26:56I have a 52-year-old daughter, and thanks to COVID, I have a 4-and-a-half-year-old
00:27:00daughter.
00:27:00COVID was good to me.
00:27:01I never thought at 65 years old I'd have a 4-and-a-half-year-old daughter, right?
00:27:05Are you kidding me?
00:27:06I've already done all that.
00:27:08But it's the greatest joy of my life because she makes me see the adventure in the smile.
00:27:13I want to do more for her than I want to do for everything else.
00:27:16Every day is new because everything is new for her.
00:27:18You just need some new elements.
00:27:20So it doesn't have to be a child, but I wouldn't mind recommending the possibility for you and your lady.
00:27:24I don't know how she feels about it.
00:27:26But I think at some point in your life, there has to be something more than you that calls you.
00:27:31I'm trying to give you a sermon.
00:27:33I'm just so passionate.
00:27:33I have a love for you because you've delivered so much value, and I hate when I see someone with
00:27:38so much value.
00:27:38And to me, I see this as a little bit of suffering.
00:27:41You wouldn't call it that.
00:27:42There's a conflict inside.
00:27:44I don't want to see you suffer.
00:27:45You're too good a human being.
00:27:46I don't see anybody suffer, much less you.
00:27:47I appreciate that.
00:27:49Does any of that make any sense to you?
00:27:51Yes.
00:27:51What part makes sense to you?
00:27:52I'm curious.
00:27:52So there's two, well, three things.
00:27:54So one was the emotional connection part.
00:27:57The second was the framing of the opportunity.
00:27:59And then the third was around suffering.
00:28:00And so I want to touch on each of those.
00:28:03Okay, great.
00:28:03So from the suffering perspective, I find that really interesting because passion comes from the Latin passio, right?
00:28:08Yes.
00:28:09Which means suffering or to endure.
00:28:10Yeah, I know.
00:28:11And so that made actually a tremendous amount of sense for me.
00:28:14And so I actually reframed that whole concept as like find a goal worth suffering for.
00:28:18And so I've been very accepting of my suffering.
00:28:20And to your point, I actually don't have a lot of anxiety.
00:28:23That's actually not the issue that I deal with.
00:28:26I deal with the other opposite, the opposite extreme of not giving a fuck.
00:28:29Is it worth it?
00:28:30Who cares?
00:28:30Why bother?
00:28:31You know, whatever.
00:28:32So that was on the suffering piece.
00:28:34But before you do that, can I give you feedback?
00:28:36Please.
00:28:36If I may.
00:28:37Again, I'm not pretending to have the answer for you.
00:28:39But I'm just giving my two cents.
00:28:40Because you're asking.
00:28:41I'm open.
00:28:41Because I want to see more of that smile than I see in you right now.
00:28:45I'm wide open.
00:28:46This is the real you right here, by the way.
00:28:48But what happened is you were so in your head.
00:28:50So even think of what you did.
00:28:52Like a goal worth suffering for.
00:28:54Fuck that.
00:28:55I mean, I don't have goals that I'm worth suffering for.
00:28:58No, don't get me wrong.
00:28:59Every day is not like pure bliss.
00:29:02And there's lots of things that I don't love to do that I need to do to succeed or I
00:29:05got to deal with.
00:29:06That's part of life.
00:29:07But pain is part of life.
00:29:09Suffering is an option.
00:29:10You've heard that phrase, but it's a fact.
00:29:11It's not just a phrase.
00:29:12It's why you've heard that shit some more.
00:29:14But when you make it your goal to find a goal we're suffering for, you're going to suffer.
00:29:19Right?
00:29:19So it's in your language.
00:29:21I got my wish.
00:29:21You've got your wish.
00:29:22And what's happened is this part of you is so strong, brother.
00:29:26This part of you is too, but this is the lead right now.
00:29:29If you change the lead to here by that sense of connection and everything else and get the hell out
00:29:33of your head.
00:29:34Because your brain is always going to reduce things.
00:29:36It's like your brain will never make you happy.
00:29:38That's the problem.
00:29:40It won't even allow you to join an apple.
00:29:42You go, is it organic?
00:29:43It's like your brain is analyzing so much.
00:29:47You got so stuck up here that you're missing this magnificent human being that I see in front of me
00:29:53here.
00:29:54You're missing to have the joy of him.
00:29:56So stop this getting what we're suffering for.
00:29:59Can I have some question on that?
00:30:00Yes, of course.
00:30:00So with the get out of your head, get into your heart.
00:30:04Yes.
00:30:04I love the language.
00:30:05I don't understand what it means.
00:30:07I know, because right now you're in your head still.
00:30:08Sure.
00:30:09Because by the way, when you laugh like this, can you feel the difference?
00:30:12Like this guy right here is smiling at me right now.
00:30:14Is that a different guy?
00:30:16Yes.
00:30:16Okay, so let's do this.
00:30:18Okay.
00:30:18I have multiple parts of me.
00:30:20Most of us in life try to pretend we're one thing.
00:30:22Society makes you try to pretend you're one thing.
00:30:24I'm sure your wife has multiple personalities.
00:30:26My wife sure does.
00:30:28When I first met her, I'd have a conversation that she'd be talking about.
00:30:30I'd be like, who is this person over here, right?
00:30:32I had to come up with different names.
00:30:33Look at the smile on your face.
00:30:34You know exactly what I'm talking about.
00:30:35That's my heart.
00:30:37But I started naming the parts of my wife so I knew who I was talking with.
00:30:40There's Bonnie Pearl.
00:30:41There's Sage.
00:30:41There's some names I can't tell you.
00:30:43Is this Friday night Layla or is this Tuesday morning Layla?
00:30:46But the point of the matter is we as humans try to reduce ourselves for simplicity's sake
00:30:51and society does to one thing.
00:30:52It's easier to manage, right?
00:30:53There are many parts of you.
00:30:55So what's the part of this guy that's so intellectual that he's going to suffer
00:31:00and he's going to get it done anyway?
00:31:02It's not this guy right here.
00:31:03This guy, I like this guy here.
00:31:04This guy is very different.
00:31:05Is this guy different?
00:31:06Yeah.
00:31:07Okay.
00:31:07So you just shift it just like that, right?
00:31:09So who's the guy who's in his head all the time and is analytical?
00:31:12He's brilliant, by the way.
00:31:13He's absolutely effing brilliant and he can succeed in anything at the outset.
00:31:17What's that guy's name?
00:31:18Give me a nickname for that guy.
00:31:20One that maybe will make you laugh.
00:31:21There you go.
00:31:22Analytical Alex.
00:31:22Analytical what?
00:31:24Analytical Alex.
00:31:24Okay.
00:31:25Analytical Alex.
00:31:26Okay.
00:31:26Okay.
00:31:27Who's this guy who's just laughing with me, looked over his wife, big smile on his face.
00:31:31Your smile is infectious, right?
00:31:33You know?
00:31:34And this is you, right?
00:31:35Yeah.
00:31:35Okay.
00:31:35So who's this guy?
00:31:36Anabolic Alex.
00:31:37Anabolic Alex.
00:31:41So Anabolic Alex has so much life in him.
00:31:45Can you feel it?
00:31:46Yeah.
00:31:46Okay.
00:31:47So what happens is think about a relationship.
00:31:50Try it that way.
00:31:52Most people get in a relationship and they, I always tell people, the secret to relationship,
00:31:5780% of having a great lasting relationship or intimate relationship is selection.
00:32:02And people will say to me, well, shit, why didn't you tell me that before I was married
00:32:05for 10 years or so?
00:32:05I said, no, no, no, I don't mean who you select, who you select to be in this relationship.
00:32:11So when you're in the beginning of a relationship, what do most people do in the very beginning
00:32:14of a relationship?
00:32:14What will they do for the other person?
00:32:16The best behavior, all that kind of stuff.
00:32:17Anything.
00:32:19Lighting them up lights you up.
00:32:21There's no transaction value.
00:32:23You're not trying to see what you can get.
00:32:24Like your joy is making joy for them, right?
00:32:27Yeah.
00:32:27And you give your all, you dress properly, you do all the thing, well, whatever properly.
00:32:32But you get the idea.
00:32:33You give your best foot forward.
00:32:34Then people get married sometimes.
00:32:36And after a certain number of years, they forget.
00:32:40And they bring a different person to the table who's always analyzing.
00:32:43Like, what did you do versus what do I do?
00:32:45And they're measuring.
00:32:46That's a transaction.
00:32:47No one wants to be part of a transaction in an intimate relationship.
00:32:50And when you ever do a transaction, it's not fair anyway.
00:32:52Because in a relationship, it's like a team sport.
00:32:55You're climbing a mountain.
00:32:56Who's leading and who's following changes if you're climbing a big mountain, right?
00:33:00And you can't lead the whole damn time.
00:33:01You'd love to, but you can't.
00:33:03You've got to switch off, right, to make things work.
00:33:05So it's like, which part of you you select to do business with?
00:33:10Which part of you is going to run your business?
00:33:12And so many of your viewers, I see people different than you.
00:33:15They'll be like, oh, you know, I just, you know, I know I need to fire this person.
00:33:20I need to let go of this or I got to do this.
00:33:22But, you know, I just can't hurt them.
00:33:23I was in that stage at one stage of my own life.
00:33:26If you put that person in charge of your business, you're going to fail.
00:33:29Yeah, right.
00:33:29Right?
00:33:30Because you're going to be taking care of this person and hurting your platinum players, right?
00:33:33You're hurting your clients, right?
00:33:35So it's like we all have to pick the person we're going to be and be conscious of that.
00:33:41And in your case, my friend, it's not so you can succeed because this will make you succeed.
00:33:45I have a strong one here too.
00:33:46But if I let this thing take over, I would be bored shitless.
00:33:50I'd be like, okay, I got, you know, five sports teams and I got a billion dollars and I got
00:33:55this business, that business.
00:33:56And, you know, everybody tells me every day I'm the greatest thing in their life and I changed their life.
00:34:00And I got five kids.
00:34:01And like, where's the meaning of my life?
00:34:03That's what the brain does because the brain reduces everything and compares it.
00:34:07Whereas the heart magnifies everything.
00:34:10It takes the little things that makes them bigger.
00:34:12What made you attracted to your wife when you first met her?
00:34:18By the way, who's this guy right here?
00:34:21Anabolic, Alex.
00:34:23Right?
00:34:24The honest truth was that I, once I met her, I didn't want to not be with her.
00:34:29Yes, why?
00:34:30What qualities about her did you not want to be without?
00:34:33I think she let me be me.
00:34:36Yeah, she loved you for being you.
00:34:37Yeah, she just never tried to change me.
00:34:39And I think that was what was so unique.
00:34:40That's quite miraculous.
00:34:41I'm fortunate at the same thing.
00:34:43And I found that Sage loved me not because I was Tony Robbins.
00:34:45She just loved me.
00:34:46I never experienced that before, right?
00:34:48So, and what else about her besides the fact that she loved you unconditionally?
00:34:51She also loved the same stuff that I loved.
00:34:53Yes.
00:34:54And so when we talked, we just wouldn't stop.
00:34:58And I feel like it has been one very long conversation.
00:35:00We spent two weekends apart since the day we met.
00:35:04Wow, that's beautiful.
00:35:05Like not in the same, literally the same place.
00:35:07Does she bring out analytical Alex or anabolic Alex?
00:35:10We work together, so she sees both sides.
00:35:12I'm not asking that.
00:35:13I'm saying, which one can she bring out if she wants?
00:35:15Oh, she can bring out whoever she wants.
00:35:16That's right.
00:35:17That's her power, right?
00:35:18Yeah.
00:35:18But who does she want more?
00:35:20Oh, she for sure wants anabolic Alex.
00:35:21Yes, of course.
00:35:22Because look at this man before me.
00:35:23This, like you're a different man right now when we started here, right?
00:35:26Can you feel that?
00:35:27Yeah.
00:35:27I didn't do shit.
00:35:29This is you.
00:35:30But if you don't identify, like, think about it.
00:35:32The strongest force in the human personality for any human being, you, me, doesn't matter.
00:35:38The strongest force is that we need to stay consistent with the way we identify ourselves.
00:35:43Right?
00:35:44Identity is the controlling force of human being.
00:35:46If you are an identity that says, I always find the way to victory, you will find the
00:35:51victory.
00:35:52If you're Lance Armstrong and they say, oh, by the way, you have cancer in your brain,
00:35:57in your lungs, and in your testicles, which is inconvenient since you ride a bike, right?
00:36:02What does he say?
00:36:03He says, I will find a way.
00:36:04What do some people say?
00:36:05Their belief is, I'm at the effect of things.
00:36:08Life controls me.
00:36:09What makes people, by the way, miserable is when they feel events control them versus
00:36:13they control events.
00:36:13And all it is is a shift in here and here, right?
00:36:16So Lance had that belief system, and he found the way.
00:36:18Live strong.
00:36:19Yeah.
00:36:20But he also said, I'm going to find a way to win using drugs that were illegal.
00:36:25Right?
00:36:25And so it lost, cost him his reputation, but he won all these things, right?
00:36:29So your identity is everything.
00:36:32And so you have to be careful because very often in life, we identify to who we were a
00:36:37while ago.
00:36:37Like if I ask someone at an event, do something, they go, I'm not that kind of person.
00:36:40Well, when did you decide what kind of person you were?
00:36:43Five years ago, 10 years ago, 20 years ago, 30 years ago?
00:36:45Would you use a phone from 10 years ago?
00:36:47You'd be an idiot.
00:36:48Why would you use the same old identity?
00:36:50I'm not saying get rid of it.
00:36:51I'm saying let's expand it.
00:36:53And in you, I don't have to, I don't have to teach you shit.
00:36:56You've done everything you do.
00:36:57But what I could offer you is a conscious choice to find anabolic Alex.
00:37:04Look, he's already mentioning you there and put him in charge.
00:37:07Your level of happiness go.
00:37:09And then stop your hypnosis.
00:37:10You hypnotize yourself a long time.
00:37:12It's time to transcend.
00:37:14Transcend means end the trance.
00:37:16Okay.
00:37:17Whatever you say to yourself over and over again, people, you know, you tell a lie big enough, loud enough,
00:37:21long enough, sooner or later people believe you.
00:37:23You've told yourself a lie.
00:37:24Fuck happiness.
00:37:25No.
00:37:26Fuck suffering.
00:37:28That's, you've got to be your new one.
00:37:29Fuck suffering.
00:37:31Like, I want to engage enjoyment.
00:37:32It's not my duty.
00:37:33It's my gift.
00:37:34It's my honor.
00:37:35It's my opportunity.
00:37:37It's, it's grace that has put me at this point in my life.
00:37:40Think of all the other people you've met.
00:37:41You and I both have busted our ass.
00:37:43We wouldn't be here with that.
00:37:44But we've also had grace in our life.
00:37:46Your woman is grace in your life.
00:37:48My woman is grace in my life.
00:37:49I always say, listen, I got my wife because of karma.
00:37:52I have helped tens of millions of people worldwide.
00:37:55And that was my reward right there.
00:37:56You know?
00:37:57And that makes me smile like you're smiling right now.
00:37:59because I really believe it's true.
00:38:01So it's like those little shifts, they set.
00:38:03I teach something called transformational vocabulary.
00:38:05It's one of the simplest things in the world.
00:38:06I was in a meeting when I was probably, no, probably younger than you.
00:38:10I was probably 32.
00:38:12And I was, two other partners who were very wealthy, super successful.
00:38:16One worth a billion dollars, another very, very close to it.
00:38:18But very different personalities.
00:38:20And where three of us were partners in a certain deal.
00:38:23And I won't bore you the details, but I'll give you the core.
00:38:25The core was, we went in a negotiation.
00:38:27And I'm an open book, as you can probably tell.
00:38:30I don't claim to be right about everything, but I'm going to share what I believe, right?
00:38:33Certain areas I know, just like you know, right?
00:38:34Because of my life experience.
00:38:36But when negotiation for me, I was like, F negotiation.
00:38:39Let's just put our cards on the table.
00:38:40I want to be able to do business with somebody who's honest.
00:38:42I want to tell you the whole thing.
00:38:44Let's do something fair, right?
00:38:45But you know, if you go to certain people, if they don't fight for it, they feel like they don't
00:38:51want to do business, right?
00:38:52They want to feel like they beat you, right?
00:38:54So I go on this negotiation without telling my partners.
00:38:57I open the door and I tell them the good, the bad, and the ugly.
00:39:00And I said, I think this is a deal that would work.
00:39:02I want a deal that's more than happy for you.
00:39:04Because I'm the kind of guy that I'll do a deal.
00:39:06And then afterwards, now I give a person a little bit back, even if they agreed to it.
00:39:10That's how I got prepared for 20 or 30 years because I'm generous, right?
00:39:14So I'm trying to be generous.
00:39:15But if you're trying to be generous with a shark, it'll take your arm, right?
00:39:19So I'm this 32-year-old kid.
00:39:21I'm not realizing you're much more sophisticated at your age than I was at mine.
00:39:24And so I tell the guys all this stuff, thinking, okay, let's come together.
00:39:29Everyone went perfect, but let's go together.
00:39:31Long term, who cares?
00:39:32As long as we respect each other, love each other, we're going to crush this opportunity, right?
00:39:37And the other side, without giving me all the gory details, takes it, uses it, and tries
00:39:41to manipulate us with leverage to make a deal that was far worse than we should be in.
00:39:46So I'm effing pissed.
00:39:48I am angry as hell.
00:39:50I'm pissed off.
00:39:51I'm frustrated.
00:39:52One of my partners goes apeshit.
00:39:55He's like, I'm furious.
00:39:56He said, I'm enraged.
00:39:58I'll kill these effers.
00:40:00And he was so intense that even though I was pissed off, I was like, hey, it's not
00:40:04that bad, right?
00:40:05You know, I'm trying to calm him down.
00:40:07While I'm trying to calm him down, I notice my other partner, he's not even moved by this
00:40:13thing.
00:40:13Like, he doesn't seem even slightly upset, which almost upset me.
00:40:16You know, like, don't you get it?
00:40:18He's too crazy in my mind.
00:40:20He's not feeling enough.
00:40:21So I said to him, like, aren't you upset?
00:40:23He goes, yeah, aren't you furious?
00:40:24I'm like, calm down.
00:40:25He goes, yeah, I'm a little annoyed.
00:40:29At first what he said, I'm a little annoyed.
00:40:31I said, annoyed?
00:40:32Like, the word annoyed annoyed me, right?
00:40:34Don't you understand?
00:40:35That's what they did.
00:40:36He's like, don't understand.
00:40:37I'm like, calm him down.
00:40:39In the middle of it all, I couldn't help.
00:40:40I'm a student of behavior, right?
00:40:42So I couldn't help but notice all three of us have had the same problem delivered to
00:40:46us, and all three of us have radically different emotional responses, okay?
00:40:50Why?
00:40:51And I'm listening, and he's going, I'm enraged.
00:40:54I'm furious.
00:40:54I'll kill the MFers.
00:40:56And I'm thinking, I'm going, I'm so pissed off.
00:40:58I'm pissed as hell.
00:40:59I'm angry.
00:41:00And then I'm hearing him say, I'm annoyed.
00:41:05And I said, annoyed?
00:41:06I mean, that's it.
00:41:07He goes, well, and then he said, I'm a little tinkled.
00:41:10I said, tinkled?
00:41:10What are you talking about?
00:41:13And he's going, so in the middle of all this, I fought for a moment.
00:41:15I couldn't help, but I said, you know what?
00:41:17I don't think I've ever seen you really angry.
00:41:19He said, I don't really get that angry.
00:41:21It's very rare.
00:41:23I said, well, what about, he had this deal with this IRS agent came to his house.
00:41:26He's a very wealthy guy, right?
00:41:28And the guy was, the IRS agent, my guess is, was, you know, threatened by or upset by the
00:41:34level of wealth he had.
00:41:35And so he did some things that he eventually wanted.
00:41:37It took him five years to get his money back.
00:41:38He fought the IRS and won, which is pretty rare.
00:41:41But during those five years, it was brutal, you know, by anybody looking on the outside.
00:41:44I said, you're going to tell me you were annoyed with that?
00:41:47He goes, no, I was peeved.
00:41:50I was peeved, right?
00:41:52And then I asked him something really interesting.
00:41:54I said, what do you believe about getting angry?
00:41:58And he goes, I believe if you get angry, the other guy wins.
00:42:02You lose, yeah, 100%.
00:42:03Right?
00:42:03And I'm like, I never thought of it that way.
00:42:05Yeah.
00:42:05And this other guy believes if you don't get angry, when I get angry, I get powerful.
00:42:09And I thought, when I get angry, I get sharp.
00:42:12Right?
00:42:12But I also thought, when I'm really happy, I get sharp.
00:42:16And it changed me.
00:42:17I started saying, okay, I call it transformational vocabulary because the words you attach to
00:42:21your experience, as I said, become your experience.
00:42:24My mother would call me one time.
00:42:25I'm old enough.
00:42:26You're probably not old enough.
00:42:27Before we had cell phones, you know, we had these little recorder calls, you know, it was
00:42:31like on a reel to reel.
00:42:33And you called in and got your calls.
00:42:35Well, I went to England and Europe for about, I don't know, two weeks.
00:42:38And I gave my staff the time off.
00:42:40They've been working their tail off.
00:42:41So my mom calls every day and leaves a message.
00:42:43She doesn't get a call back.
00:42:44And when I called from England, the little beep thing wouldn't translate.
00:42:47So I didn't know what was on there.
00:42:48I didn't know what was on there.
00:42:48I didn't know what was on there.
00:42:48I come home.
00:42:50There are 10 days worth of messages.
00:42:53And every single message, she says, I am humiliated.
00:42:56This is humiliated.
00:42:56My son is not the president.
00:42:57It's the most humiliating experience of my life.
00:43:00And as I'm listening to this going, my mom is always humiliated.
00:43:03Do you know why?
00:43:04If there's a funnel of experience and it's painful, he's going annoyed.
00:43:08to pee, I'm going pissed off.
00:43:09And he's going, I'm going to kill him, right?
00:43:11My mom always uses the word for anything uncomfortable, for humiliating.
00:43:15So she's always humiliated.
00:43:16So like, I'm never depressed.
00:43:18I was so depressed when I got chased out of my house and I had no money in the background.
00:43:22I lived in this place of depression.
00:43:24And I remember reading this book by Claude M. Bristol.
00:43:26It's called The Magic of Believing.
00:43:27And I read the book and it talked about how to condition your mind.
00:43:30And one of the things I did, I wrote on soap on the mirror, I wrote, you know,
00:43:35only a loser is depressed, which isn't true.
00:43:37You can be a winner and be depressed and feel that way.
00:43:39But I knew I wasn't a loser.
00:43:40That was my leverage.
00:43:41Yeah.
00:43:42And I literally took the word depression out of my vocabulary.
00:43:45I've never used it again.
00:43:46I felt down.
00:43:46I felt pissed off.
00:43:47I felt frustrated.
00:43:48I felt sad.
00:43:49I felt overwhelmed in moments.
00:43:51But I've never felt depressed.
00:43:52Because when I was depressed, I got to the point where I was questioning whether it's worth
00:43:54it all.
00:43:55You know what I mean?
00:43:55And so your words shape your psychology.
00:44:00And so a few word changes, as stupid as that sounds, as overly simplistic as that sounds,
00:44:04or people give metaphors.
00:44:06They'll say, oh, man, I'm like, I'm at the end of my rope.
00:44:09And I'll go, well, set it down and come over here.
00:44:12What are you talking about?
00:44:12We hypnotize ourselves.
00:44:14You know, or someone will say, well, that person stabbed me in the back.
00:44:17And I'll walk up to him and I'll lay him behind the back.
00:44:19I said, I don't see anything.
00:44:20You know what I mean?
00:44:21No, I don't.
00:44:22Well, they betrayed me.
00:44:23Well, what did they do?
00:44:24And you dig in and they go, they told someone else something they said they wouldn't tell
00:44:27them.
00:44:28But the words escalated the emotion.
00:44:30And once they're there as a metaphor or as words, they control us.
00:44:34I invite every business person to notice this.
00:44:37I remember, you know, I decided to get a divorce when I was 40 or, yeah, 39 years old.
00:44:42And I didn't want to have a divorce.
00:44:43I had forefathers.
00:44:45I was going to stay no matter what.
00:44:46Duty.
00:44:47All those things that were going for me, right?
00:44:49And then I remember I go to my friend, Peter Guber, and I was like, you know, I just,
00:44:53I just, I don't know.
00:44:55I can't imagine doing this.
00:44:56And then I'm going to do, I said, I'm going to give her more than half.
00:44:59And then I want to take care of her.
00:45:00But I just, we're the whole part of starting over again, you know, starting over.
00:45:05And he grabbed me by the arm and he goes, I'm going to teach you what you've taught me
00:45:08for the last 10 years.
00:45:09He goes, you are not starting over.
00:45:11That language is putting you in this place.
00:45:13He said, you couldn't possibly start over.
00:45:16He said, you could take everything from you.
00:45:18No one can take the man you become, the knowledge you have, the skill you have, the relationships
00:45:22you have, all those things.
00:45:23But starting over was my trance for being in pain.
00:45:26And when I stopped doing that, it was like, no, you know, I'm starting fresh.
00:45:29I know that sounds simplistic, but linguistics change how the brain functions.
00:45:34And so part of yours is some simple linguistics, but the other part is state, because anabolic
00:45:41Alex, I've got to understand, look, he shows up, all you've got to do.
00:45:44So all you've got to do is saying, it's time for anabolic Alex here.
00:45:46And then a moonshot that's going to wake you up and then get emotionally associated, like
00:45:50go, like if I just provided all this, when I first fed people, I would go there in a
00:45:54t-shirt and jeans, not so they acknowledge me, but so I could see and feel the impact as
00:45:59opposed to I wrote a check or I did some good work or they did it.
00:46:02The more connected you are, and that once you get in the habit of that, like, like people
00:46:07say me all the time, doesn't it get old?
00:46:09People cook to you 10, 15 times a day and tell you, you've changed my life.
00:46:11No, it's one of the things I enjoy most besides my family, but it's because I've trained myself
00:46:17never take it for granted.
00:46:18Right?
00:46:19Is that helpful at all?
00:46:20Yes.
00:46:21Okay.
00:46:22From the.
00:46:22Stay in anabolic Alex here before you ask me.
00:46:25Do your best to ask me a question about anabolic Alex here, because you go back to your
00:46:28brain.
00:46:28I'm so happy you've got a very smart brain.
00:46:30We can use him too.
00:46:31But let's start, let's try with anabolic Alex as you ask.
00:46:34So in order to create the emotional connection, because that is like the thing that I probably
00:46:38have struggled the most from, but I think it's made me disproportionately successful from
00:46:41a business perspective because I can make good calls.
00:46:43Right.
00:46:43But, you know, I remember the first time I wrote a million dollar check and then multiple
00:46:46million dollar checks to charities and I was just like, okay, I feel a couple million
00:46:51bucks poor.
00:46:51That's about it.
00:46:52You know, like.
00:46:52Yeah, because you're not emotionally associated anyway.
00:46:54Zero.
00:46:54But like, you know, I did the tours of the school and I was like, I'm glad that this all,
00:47:00you know,
00:47:00helps.
00:47:00Because you haven't found the thing.
00:47:01Just contribution for contribution is not what I'm talking about.
00:47:04And this is where I wanted to get.
00:47:05So like, so my last little word of the ones that we covered most of them was opportunity.
00:47:10Yes.
00:47:10And so I think the question that I have is you have unlimited opportunities.
00:47:15Yeah.
00:47:16More opportunities than you can sink your teeth into.
00:47:18Yeah.
00:47:19How do you go through opportunity selection and balancing your kind of achievement brain
00:47:24outcomes and your philanthropic impact feeding families outcomes?
00:47:29I look at opportunities first, a business perspective.
00:47:32Yeah.
00:47:32I look at opportunities first to see, do I, do I have passion for what it's about?
00:47:37Is it something that I would do for free if I felt it was really successful, that it felt
00:47:43fulfilling, it felt alive, it felt it was worth doing, right?
00:47:47Is there, is there a mission behind it?
00:47:48Is it just, is it selling widgets?
00:47:50I have no interest, right?
00:47:51Hmm.
00:47:51Second thing I look for is who are the people I want people.
00:47:55I'm going to enjoy being with, like, I would enjoy being with you in spite of this conversation
00:47:58sounding like I wouldn't because I'd bring out more anabolic Alex.
00:48:01I bet your wife brings out more anabolic Alex, right?
00:48:03So I'm trying to make sure that if I was doing business with you, I'd make sure this guy
00:48:06was present.
00:48:06Right.
00:48:07But the, but I look at the people and I look at their heart and soul, what's driving
00:48:11them.
00:48:12And I also look at their skill because you need both, right?
00:48:14So if someone's got a track record and someone's negotiating with me right now on a really
00:48:18large project, and if the project made no money, I would probably do the project as long as
00:48:24I organize it so I can, have the kind of reward for my time and my energy, because the project
00:48:28has such reach, global reach, on a very deep level.
00:48:33I'm very connected to it, and this person's built the business and went to $2 billion,
00:48:36so they got a great track record.
00:48:37It's not me caring at all.
00:48:39But together, one plus one could equal five, not two.
00:48:42So a deal like that gets my attention because most of the money I make I give away at this
00:48:46stage of my life anyway, right?
00:48:47It's like, there's, you know, I don't, I'm not hurt for any capital.
00:48:51Yeah.
00:48:51I know there's no toy that I'm looking for and it never drove me anyway.
00:48:55So for me, it's like, if it's got enough juice in it here, the people I'm going to enjoy
00:49:00being with, and it's got enough juice in terms of the impact, and then it has track record
00:49:05of the person likely to help get there so it isn't all my back, the two of us are adding
00:49:09some value together, it's about added value, then I'm in.
00:49:12And it's like, let's, let's rock this thing.
00:49:15Let's make it happen.
00:49:15Let's have some fun.
00:49:16See, mine is let's have some fun, not let's do the duty, right?
00:49:20It's like, I'm going to learn.
00:49:21We're going to grow.
00:49:22We're going to expand different things.
00:49:23We're going to touch lives.
00:49:24We're going to have these things.
00:49:24So those are my core criteria.
00:49:26And I'm not always right.
00:49:27But one thing I will tell you that I've done in business because I've made some poor choices
00:49:31in the early days on business partners.
00:49:33You know, everybody's selling when you're going to business partnership, right?
00:49:37And it's like going on a date, you know, so it's like, you can get sold.
00:49:40And the question is not going to do the job.
00:49:42Will they do the job long term?
00:49:43Is the way team fit?
00:49:44Like they're deeper questions.
00:49:46But I now, when I have so many business deals, the first thing I do early on, I just
00:49:50had this happen recently.
00:49:51with somebody's a large power plant, a 1.3 gigawatt power plant.
00:49:55I'm converting it to hydrogen.
00:49:56So it's in West Virginia.
00:49:58Dean told me about this.
00:49:58Yeah.
00:49:58Yeah.
00:49:59So it's a great, it's a great project, but I have some people involved that shouldn't
00:50:02have been involved.
00:50:03And so I had some new people to come on board.
00:50:05And what I do now is I go, they sold me.
00:50:07I was actually liking them.
00:50:08I felt the vision was great.
00:50:10They seemed to have the track record.
00:50:11Everything seemed to line up.
00:50:13And I said, look, you know what I always do in any new partnership is I have everybody check
00:50:17me out legally.
00:50:18I want you to check out all everything online.
00:50:20Hire a private detective if you want.
00:50:21Know everything about me.
00:50:22And you can ask me any question you want.
00:50:24But I want to do the same with you because that's how I know when I'm starting.
00:50:27Now, by the way, though nothing I hear will I take as true, because, you know, it's not
00:50:31true, but I'll bring it to you and we can discuss it.
00:50:32And then you and I can tell, you know, most people have large, you and I have large bullshit
00:50:36meters, right?
00:50:36We can tell when something's bullshit.
00:50:38It's a perfect example.
00:50:39And this guy, we had a deal worth, you know, 10 figures plus, looked really good.
00:50:46Ghosted us.
00:50:47Wow.
00:50:47Just ghosted us.
00:50:49And then I uncovered.
00:50:51I uncovered three or four things he'd done that were not great.
00:50:53I was like, I just saved myself three to five years of pain.
00:50:57So I do believe in the practical side.
00:51:00But I first, I'm not even interested in going there unless I can first find these pieces
00:51:03and unless I believe already there.
00:51:05But I could get fooled, right?
00:51:06I'm not perfect.
00:51:09So I have one last question for you, which is the most selfish of all my questions.
00:51:14So you're 36 years old.
00:51:17You have built businesses and the skill set that you are most proud of is that you're good
00:51:22at helping business owners.
00:51:23Yeah.
00:51:24The only thing I feel emotional connection to is teaching young men how to provide for themselves
00:51:29and their families.
00:51:30That's the only thing that actually like I, because I know that pain.
00:51:32Yes.
00:51:33So you're connected to it.
00:51:35That's the only thing.
00:51:35Makes sense.
00:51:36And to me, I've built a lot of the business and all that stuff basically around that.
00:51:40But I still don't feel like that massive emotional drive.
00:51:44that being said, what would you have played differently from your 36-year-old self to current
00:51:52that you could kind of pass on to me?
00:51:55Basically, what can I change about my behavior to maximize my enjoyment and size of impact?
00:52:01You have to make an enjoyment a priority, which you've not.
00:52:05You've always gotten your priorities, brother.
00:52:08You're an overachiever.
00:52:10But there's two skills in life.
00:52:11There's the science of achievement, which you're unbelievably great at,
00:52:14and there's the art of fulfillment, which you're not so great at by your description.
00:52:17Yeah, I agree.
00:52:19And by the way, notice the language difference.
00:52:20The science of achievement, it's a science.
00:52:22Like you and I both know, if you want to make money, there's a science to it, right?
00:52:25If you want to be fulfilled though, that's as unique as every human being you're going to meet.
00:52:31And so you haven't found that piece.
00:52:33Now you gave some clues along the way, like why am I so interested in feeding people?
00:52:38Because I'm such a good person?
00:52:39No, because I suffered, right?
00:52:40So I don't want other people to suffer.
00:52:42So I started out of that, but now it's not out of suffering, it's out of joy.
00:52:45You can get started out of the pain, passion does.
00:52:48Yeah.
00:52:48But you don't have to stay in the pain, right?
00:52:50You've kind of stayed in the pain, even though you've gone past it.
00:52:53Yeah.
00:52:54But what you just said is, well, a clue for me is, that's the one place I can start to
00:52:58get a philosophy associated to, because I know what it takes to do that.
00:53:01And I know what it feels like to be able to take care of my family.
00:53:03I know the contrast, right?
00:53:05So I would take a look at that and expanding it, but I'd try to find a way to do
00:53:08it where
00:53:09I had a moonshot.
00:53:11Something that's, that like, right now you're not-
00:53:14A moonshot of that.
00:53:15What's that?
00:53:15A moonshot of that.
00:53:16Exactly.
00:53:17That's what I was saying to you earlier.
00:53:18I'm not saying you should go feed people.
00:53:19Yeah, yeah, yeah.
00:53:20Or writing those checks.
00:53:21The problem is you wrote those checks, the things you didn't give a shit about.
00:53:23I mean, it's true.
00:53:24So you felt poor and then you probably felt bad about yourself for doing it.
00:53:27I did.
00:53:27I'm supposed to do good stuff.
00:53:28Why don't I feel good by doing good stuff?
00:53:30Because it's not your passion.
00:53:31It's like a piece of shit.
00:53:32I was like, I'm, I was like, I selfishly wrote these checks so that I would feel good
00:53:36and now I don't even feel good and now I'm just $2 million poorer.
00:53:39But like, but I shouldn't feel bad about doing good.
00:53:41And then it was just the whole thing, I was like, fuck it.
00:53:43So question.
00:53:44Head or heart was having that discussion.
00:53:45Head of course, yeah.
00:53:46So analytical.
00:53:48But by the way, as you're laughing about it now, who's in charge right now?
00:53:51Anabolic, yeah.
00:53:51Right.
00:53:52That little shift, which sounds like nothing.
00:53:53I hope if nothing else you hear me say, you play with that just a little bit in your
00:53:56life and bring him to the table.
00:53:58But if you come up with a moonshot connected to that, like I'm going to, I'm making this
00:54:03completely wrong thing.
00:54:04I'm going to help 10 million young men who right now think they can't buy a home.
00:54:09They can't do it.
00:54:09Most young people here have been sold this bullshit bill of goods.
00:54:13Inflation is 3%.
00:54:14Yeah.
00:54:14And you know, I'm going to have 24 million to have 4 million.
00:54:17And it's like, that's the catastrophizing analytical side.
00:54:20Yeah.
00:54:20That's assuming that you're not going to have any growth in your assets.
00:54:23Yeah.
00:54:23And also when you're 86, which is when that would be 50 years from now, do you really
00:54:28think you're going to spend the same money?
00:54:29What the hell are you going to be buying?
00:54:30You already own multiple homes.
00:54:31You've already had those.
00:54:31They've all grown in value.
00:54:32So most young people, they are not involved with free enterprises, you know.
00:54:38And so that's why they want communism.
00:54:40Because they've never been there.
00:54:41I've been, I was in USSR when I was 23 years old.
00:54:44And I took a train from Moscow to Siberia.
00:54:47It was a group of scientists I was brought because of my fire walking things like that
00:54:50by their government.
00:54:51And back, I spent two weeks there.
00:54:53It made me a capitalist.
00:54:54Because every stop we did, there's the same thing in every city.
00:54:58There's a central place where the train stops.
00:55:00And we've been having caviar and all these Russians are like wealthy on this plane.
00:55:05They're all supposed to be equal.
00:55:07And then you see people literally three quarters of a mile around multiple times, maybe half
00:55:11a mile around, waiting in the freezing cold for half a loaf of bread and milk.
00:55:16Right?
00:55:17It's bullshit.
00:55:18But kids today are thinking, oh, it means free bus, free childcare.
00:55:21They don't understand.
00:55:22There's no such thing as no free lunch.
00:55:24What life needs you to do is if you live in a free enterprise system and you're not an
00:55:28owner, you're going to be in pain.
00:55:31You know that.
00:55:32Yeah.
00:55:32You've built businesses.
00:55:33I tell kids sometimes, they're like, here's what I understand.
00:55:36If you put 300 bucks aside where you're still living at home and you're 19 and you only
00:55:40invested and do it all in the S&P 500, you don't know anything about investing.
00:55:43And you stopped investing when you're 27 and you've only put $28,000 in.
00:55:48At 65, you got 1.8 million.
00:55:50God forbid if you keep investing, right?
00:55:51And all the numbers got bigger.
00:55:54You look at people today, they buy an iPhone.
00:55:56Yeah.
00:55:57And they buy a new one every year.
00:55:59They've been going on since 2007.
00:56:01I looked it up just the other day.
00:56:03I actually made a chart to show a kid.
00:56:04And he was telling me about, you know, there's no way you can succeed.
00:56:07And I said, okay, you've had an iPhone since the beginning.
00:56:09There's been 19 years of iPhones or whatever it's been.
00:56:12I took up the exact dollar amounts for each one and what the stock was at the same day.
00:56:17If you would have bought the stock versus the iPhone or just matched it.
00:56:21$22,000 you spend over time, which is gone, or $326,000 you would have.
00:56:27And I'm saying $326,000 will change your life.
00:56:28But for somebody who has nothing, it sure as hell would, right?
00:56:30Yeah.
00:56:31But the other part for it is helping people understand that if I get to be an owner, the
00:56:36whole game changes.
00:56:38Then inflation can be my friend.
00:56:39I don't have to live in this fear.
00:56:40I can't have something.
00:56:41So you, you could bring that to kids, whatever age.
00:56:46Yeah.
00:56:46You could bring it up.
00:56:47You could say, I've got to come something.
00:56:48I'm going to take 10 million or a million or whatever would float your boat.
00:56:52and then when you see those kids and you see scale of that and you see them taking care
00:56:58of their families and you hear stories about that, I don't think it'll be old for you.
00:57:02What'd you write the checks for?
00:57:03Kids after school care.
00:57:05Okay.
00:57:05And you don't have any kids.
00:57:08So you have no association that whatsoever.
00:57:11Right?
00:57:11Okay.
00:57:12It's like shit.
00:57:13But, and I'm not saying write a check.
00:57:16I'm saying go make this happen.
00:57:17Like go, you've done so much.
00:57:19You need to find something there, but you, you found the thread.
00:57:22Yeah.
00:57:22But for me, I wrote, you know, I wrote four books on finance.
00:57:25I never expected to do it.
00:57:27You know why I wrote it?
00:57:27Because I got pissed off in 2008.
00:57:30I've coached Paul Tudor Jones for 24 years.
00:57:32Yeah.
00:57:32One of the greatest financial traders in the history of the world.
00:57:35Every single day measured what he's doing, coached him through all these pieces.
00:57:38He had the most success in 1987 when the stock market had his biggest percentage drop
00:57:43in history, 20% in a day, and he made a hundred percent.
00:57:46But then it was like the moon.
00:57:47He went to the moon and then what do you do?
00:57:49And then he broke his leg and then he dropped, so I had to turn him around.
00:57:52And we've been friends.
00:57:52I've worked with him all those years.
00:57:54I learned so much from him.
00:57:56But when we got to 2008, and I don't know if all of your viewers have been around back
00:58:00that long, but it was much more brutal in some ways than 2020 and COVID, because COVID
00:58:04they gave people money.
00:58:05There was no money then, right?
00:58:07And I remember being so angry because I knew a small number of people basically almost destroyed
00:58:14the entire economic system.
00:58:15and then I thought they were going to be punished and we gave them more money.
00:58:18Yeah.
00:58:18So that they could have more money they can't use.
00:58:19Yeah, that's right.
00:58:20Exactly right.
00:58:21So I was incensed.
00:58:22So out of that anger, I said, I don't have all the answers, but I have one thing.
00:58:25I have access.
00:58:26Yeah.
00:58:27So I'm going to interview 50, the book you read, 50 of the smartest individuals on earth
00:58:30who started with nothing.
00:58:31Nobody from the Lucky Sperm Club.
00:58:33They all started from scratch.
00:58:34And I'm going to see, even though they're radically different, what do they have in common?
00:58:37I'm going to write a book that my billionaire clients are going to love, but an average
00:58:40person could do as well.
00:58:42Well, that journey has never stopped.
00:58:44Then I was like, how do I help people accelerate?
00:58:46I was like, I look around today and I see so many people that don't feel they have a compelling
00:58:50financial future.
00:58:51And so I started looking around and said, okay.
00:58:53That's my heart, just so you know.
00:58:54Pardon me?
00:58:54That's my heart.
00:58:55Okay.
00:58:55Well, me too.
00:58:56Helping those people.
00:58:56So my approach to that, and maybe I'm going to plant a seed with you because maybe it'll
00:58:59be something when you're teaching people to add.
00:59:02You probably already know this, but you may not know this part.
00:59:04So I'm looking around and you know, like in the last 39 years, every single stock market
00:59:10in the world, which is where most people put their money besides real estate, right?
00:59:14And if it's their own home, it just barely beats inflation, right?
00:59:16As you well know.
00:59:17Every stock in the world has been beaten by private equity, by average private equity.
00:59:22So I interviewed the top 13 guys in the world, right?
00:59:24Well, the top 13 guys in the world, it's wonderful to interview them, but how are you going to
00:59:27get money in there, right?
00:59:28Because it's like trying to buy an SP3 Ferrari, right?
00:59:31I went to go get one and they're all pre-sold at 3 million bucks, right?
00:59:34But if you have one and if you know the right person, you know.
00:59:38So I got into some of those cool funds, you know, like, you know, Vista.
00:59:41You know, Robert Smith is, I mean, he's a genius.
00:59:45He's got a $100 billion fund.
00:59:47He's averaged 26% compounded per year for 25 years.
00:59:52It's like, it's unheard of, right?
00:59:54But you can't get in.
00:59:56Or you might get in, I got in, but I got such a little slumber.
00:59:58It's like, we'll take $100,000.
01:00:00$100,000.
01:00:01Okay, so let's look at this.
01:00:03Let's just do this.
01:00:03Try this for the people at home.
01:00:05In the last 39 years, if you put your money in the S&P 500, it's averaged 9%.
01:00:10Okay.
01:00:10So if you put a million bucks in there, you know, at the end of this time, you'd have
01:00:1428.6 million.
01:00:16If it's 100,000, it'd be 2.86 million, right?
01:00:18Yeah.
01:00:19But if you put in average private equity, it's been every stock market in the world, average
01:00:22private equity, not the guys I'm talking about.
01:00:24Yeah.
01:00:24Average private equity has averaged 15.7% per year around the world.
01:00:3175% higher per year, compounded year after year.
01:00:34Yeah.
01:00:35You put in that same million bucks, instead of 28 million, you have 293 million.
01:00:40More.
01:00:4010X.
01:00:41Okay?
01:00:42Forget your 3% worries that you're talking about.
01:00:44Screw that shit.
01:00:44Let's take it at 100,000.
01:00:46Then you'd have, instead of 2.8 million, you'd have 29 million.
01:00:48Right.
01:00:49Same time.
01:00:50Yeah.
01:00:51Passive investor.
01:00:52But then the next thing you got to say to me is, Tony, well, yeah, that's great, Tony,
01:00:55but you can't get access.
01:00:56So that's what I believe too.
01:00:57Like I had access, but small access.
01:00:59And then I met a guy who had been through my business master program for 20 years.
01:01:03He started his business.
01:01:04I was telling my frustration about, I'm only getting these little slivers.
01:01:07I don't know how to change your life, right?
01:01:08I don't want to get them bigger.
01:01:09And he goes, Tony, I'm going to tell you where I put the majority of my money.
01:01:12This is a very sophisticated investor.
01:01:13And I said, okay, I'm leaning in on this one, right?
01:01:16Yeah.
01:01:16He goes, there's a company in Houston, Texas.
01:01:19I said, Houston, Texas?
01:01:19I'm thinking Singapore, London, you know, New York.
01:01:23He goes, off the beaten path that has mastered something unbelievable.
01:01:26He said, you know the difference of private equity?
01:01:28I said, of course.
01:01:28He goes, what if instead of buying the fund and fighting to get a small piece, you could
01:01:34own the company that owns all the funds and make the two and 20 yourself side by side
01:01:39with the owners?
01:01:40Yeah.
01:01:40I said, you could do that?
01:01:42He goes, there's only a few companies in the world that do it.
01:01:44These guys are brilliant to get what they call general partnership safe.
01:01:47So you're a limited partner, as you know, if you go in and you got a limited amount
01:01:50you get in there.
01:01:50Yeah.
01:01:51I said, how do you do that?
01:01:53So I went and met with this guy.
01:01:54Turned out he was a graduate of my programs and 20 years ago, started his business with
01:01:57it.
01:01:57It's called Kaz.
01:01:58It's Christopher Zook.
01:01:59And I talked to Christopher and so I put some money in with him.
01:02:02And the next thing I know, I got ownership in Vista.
01:02:06Not, I got a little slice of Vista, right?
01:02:08I'm getting the two and 20.
01:02:09So I have 95 of those companies now that have a piece of, it's, it is nothing but a cash
01:02:15machine
01:02:15beyond wireless dreams.
01:02:16I get to work with the smartest people in the world.
01:02:18They're working all night and I'm right beside them earning without working all night on
01:02:21those pieces.
01:02:22Right?
01:02:23And now the same thing with sports teams.
01:02:24I worked forever to get my first sports team, the LAFC and you got to go through every,
01:02:28they look at a microscope through every part of your body.
01:02:31It's just ridiculous.
01:02:31Right?
01:02:32But the rules have changed recently.
01:02:34And now if you have private equity and the owners don't own other sports teams,
01:02:37there's some technicalities with it.
01:02:39There's a small percentage that you can buy.
01:02:41So I own a part of, I owned the Dodgers when I was growing up, I couldn't be in right
01:02:45field.
01:02:45I couldn't afford a ticket.
01:02:46Right?
01:02:47The Dodgers.
01:02:47I own the Golden State Warriors.
01:02:49I own the Pittsburgh Penguins.
01:02:50I own Aston Martin's F1.
01:02:52I own pieces of all these businesses all through our business.
01:02:55Then I became partners with them and grew that business.
01:02:57When I met them, it was 1.8 billion.
01:02:59That was four years ago.
01:03:00Now we're at 11 billion, just an AUM in that business.
01:03:02So the opportunity to grow is insane, but here's the problem.
01:03:07You had to be an accredited investor, which means you got a million dollar net worth or
01:03:10qualified purchaser, 5 million.
01:03:12So your young people are going to go, I can't do that.
01:03:14I wrote this book because I found out it just passed three weeks ago.
01:03:18The house just passed a new rule.
01:03:20Why should the richest people in the world be the only people who get access to the most
01:03:23effective investments?
01:03:24Don't get me wrong.
01:03:25You've got to diversify, but you've got to have a significant port here if you get this
01:03:29kind of 10 times return.
01:03:31And so they were smart because it's like they say, well, you're not sophisticated.
01:03:35Well, some people have a million dollars, but they inherited it.
01:03:37They're not sophisticated or they're a good business person, but they're not a good investor.
01:03:42So a group of people, I was arguing with this and it wasn't me.
01:03:44It finally got resolved.
01:03:45Three weeks ago, they passed the law.
01:03:47Now the Senate will pick it up in April.
01:03:50And what it says is you don't have to be a accredited investor to get access anymore.
01:03:53All you got to do is take a test.
01:03:54They're working on what the test is.
01:03:56That's interesting.
01:03:56You study for the test and now you can put your money and get the same kind of returns
01:03:59to the richest people in the world.
01:04:00And in my case, you can own a piece of those businesses.
01:04:04So when you're going to show people how to build their own business, the only challenge
01:04:07with their own business is you and I both know if there's any law of finance that everybody
01:04:12knows, but very few people practice, it's asset allocation, right?
01:04:15You don't put all your eggs in one basket.
01:04:17So most people don't have the eggs in their business because they feel in more control.
01:04:20And then there's a COVID that happens, right?
01:04:22I always tell people you need two businesses, the one you're in, the one you're building,
01:04:26but also that business plus an investment business where it's growing.
01:04:31So if everything happens here, you're taking care of here.
01:04:33And if they both win, you get there faster than you ever dreamed of, but you got to know
01:04:37where to put your assets.
01:04:38And this is just part of that process.
01:04:40So, but for you, it's like, I know what my passion is there.
01:04:43You can feel my passion.
01:04:44I'm going to tell everybody about it.
01:04:45It's like, I don't give a shit about making money.
01:04:47And it's like, and of course I make money too.
01:04:49It's like, it's unbelievable.
01:04:50You got to find that with this piece.
01:04:52What do you think it would be?
01:04:53If you had to tell me right now, I'm not talking to analytical guy.
01:04:56Come back to the analog guy.
01:04:57I saw your eyes grow up there.
01:04:59The analog guy, what would he have said?
01:05:01I'm going to crush something.
01:05:02It's going to feel so good.
01:05:04I'm going to feel so much joy.
01:05:05I'm going to do X for this many young men.
01:05:08And I'm going to, it's going to be part of who I am and my legacy and what I'm going
01:05:12to live, what I'm going to enjoy.
01:05:13Not someday along the way.
01:05:16To answer the question, I think back to what was the big moment for me?
01:05:18Like what was the moment where like wealth felt achievable?
01:05:21Yes.
01:05:22So for me it was a hundred thousand dollars in my bank account.
01:05:24Okay.
01:05:24That was the, that was the moment.
01:05:26I wrote about it in my book.
01:05:27Layla and I were on the kitchen counter and I was like, look, babe, we actually did it.
01:05:30That's awesome.
01:05:30I remember that moment too.
01:05:32It's a good moment.
01:05:32And it was to, to this day, the richest I've ever felt.
01:05:34And I think it's because it's the largest relative change in wealth I've ever experienced.
01:05:37Because you go from $1 to a hundred thousand, you get a hundred thousand X.
01:05:40And you can't, a hundred thousand X a hundred thousand takes a lot longer than the one.
01:05:44And, and, and that was.
01:05:46And by the way, once you get to a hundred thousand, your brain expands, right?
01:05:48Yeah.
01:05:48You see what's possible.
01:05:49It just keeps bigger.
01:05:50And so I think it was because the first time that I was able to go out of survival and
01:05:54I remember I looked at Layla and I said, we can fuck up for three and a half years.
01:05:59That's why I was like, we, we can, we can, we can completely screw up.
01:06:02You've never been an overhead at that time.
01:06:03Yeah, exactly.
01:06:04Three and a half years.
01:06:05And she's like, yeah, this guy's a winner.
01:06:07Really?
01:06:08All, all a hundred grand for the both of us for three and a half years.
01:06:11Gee golly.
01:06:12You know, this is after she picks me up from, from jail for getting a DUI.
01:06:15You know what I mean?
01:06:16Just different.
01:06:17That's why she's my, my, my, my one.
01:06:20That's awesome.
01:06:20But that, that moment, then like all the other milestones after that, that was the one.
01:06:25And so I think that, I think because that one milestone is this, is huge.
01:06:30It changes your identity.
01:06:32Yes, it, it does.
01:06:33It changes your whole viewpoint of the world.
01:06:34To your point about the capitalism, the capitalist system.
01:06:37Yeah.
01:06:37Is that like, that is a big enough change where you believe in capitalism.
01:06:40That's right.
01:06:40And I think that is a, a quantifiable goal that I am personally connected to that I would
01:06:46love to help deliver.
01:06:47That's great.
01:06:48I love that.
01:06:49If I can help with it, count on me.
01:06:50I'm in to help you in any way I can in there.
01:06:52I'll give you educational material, anything that you want to add to it.
01:06:54You're welcome to add to it.
01:06:55I'll give it for free.
01:06:56But that, that's exciting.
01:06:57And I love the way you did that.
01:06:59You went back to a moment where you knew what it was for you.
01:07:01Yeah.
01:07:02So that's where the passion comes from, right?
01:07:03And by the way, that wasn't pain.
01:07:05Yeah.
01:07:06That passion was an excitement that you felt.
01:07:08Yeah.
01:07:08So I know the word passion literally comes from pain.
01:07:10I know that too.
01:07:11Yeah.
01:07:11And sometimes we caught up on the original definition versus how we can live it.
01:07:15Right?
01:07:16But I love this idea.
01:07:17If you did that, how many, how many people, does it matter how many, how many, but one person alone
01:07:22feels amazing when you do that, but is there a number that in your mind would say like,
01:07:25this would be like insanely fun, insanely great.
01:07:29I think I would look at a general, like the generation.
01:07:31So it'd be like, how many men are in Gen Z?
01:07:34Perfect.
01:07:35And then I'd be like, that sounds like a good starting point.
01:07:37But what would be, what would be, well, that's a lot of kids.
01:07:39Yeah.
01:07:39What's the first target though?
01:07:40Because it's just like, it's like I do the billion.
01:07:42Then I went to the hundred billion, right?
01:07:43You know, you want an unreasonable goal, but you need a timeline.
01:07:47Okay.
01:07:47So what would be our 36 month goal or 24 month goal?
01:07:50That would be unreasonable, but we'll get you up early and keep you up late.
01:07:53A hundred thousand men at a hundred thousand is a billion in actual bank account wealth.
01:07:59And that sounds, that sounds like a nice round number.
01:08:02Yeah.
01:08:03Like a nice round number.
01:08:04Help a hundred thousand men.
01:08:06Get a hundred thousand.
01:08:07Get a hundred thousand.
01:08:08Yeah.
01:08:08And feel the way you felt them that day.
01:08:10Yeah.
01:08:11That's nice.
01:08:11And then the second lesson you can teach them along the way is how to keep enjoying it,
01:08:15my friend.
01:08:16Yeah.
01:08:17So Tony, you have an event coming up.
01:08:18Do you want to tell everyone about it?
01:08:19Yeah.
01:08:20It's called the Time to Rise Summit.
01:08:21It started when I first did, when COVID happened, because I got the governor calling me in California
01:08:26saying, you know, that place you're going to put 15,000 people, 14,000 people, you can
01:08:29put a hundred people in because of COVID.
01:08:31And then I tried to move to Vegas and they shut down Vegas and Texas.
01:08:34And so I built a studio.
01:08:35Anyway, long story short, I said, people are trapped at home.
01:08:39They're depressed.
01:08:40They're frustrated.
01:08:41I want to make a big difference.
01:08:42How could I do that?
01:08:43Oh, I'll take away the two things they worry about.
01:08:45No time.
01:08:45They don't have to travel.
01:08:47And no money.
01:08:48And so I did it for free.
01:08:49We've done it now every year for five years.
01:08:51And I didn't do like two hours.
01:08:53I did three days, but I made it chunkable.
01:08:55Three hours a day, like going to a great movie only it's changing your life.
01:08:58And instead of new year, new life and setting some goals that by the end of January they've
01:09:03not done.
01:09:03Yeah.
01:09:04We help you figure out what you want.
01:09:05Increase your energy like we're talking about here, because without that it doesn't change.
01:09:08Shift your mindset.
01:09:10Figure out what you want.
01:09:11Figure out what the plan is.
01:09:12Figure out what's getting in the way.
01:09:13And over three days and you become part of a community of a million plus people from
01:09:18193 countries that participate.
01:09:20And it's coming up January 29th through the 31st.
01:09:23And it's at 2 p.m. Eastern.
01:09:24But people do it from all time zones around the world.
01:09:27Again, no charge whatsoever.
01:09:29You can do it from your home.
01:09:29You can do it from your office.
01:09:30You might want to do it with someone.
01:09:31And then go to timetorisesummit.com.
01:09:33No charge.
01:09:34Get yourself enrolled and I look forward to serving everyone.
01:09:38Thank you so much, Tony.
01:09:39It's been a pleasure.
01:09:39I appreciate it.
01:09:40Thank you, man.
01:09:40Thank you.
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