- 1 day ago
The Yes Men 2003
Category
🎥
Short filmTranscript
00:00:33Jesus, this is terrible.
00:00:35It's the stupidest.
00:00:36I can't.
00:00:38It's an hour's difference.
00:00:40The time zone is different here.
00:00:42Fuck.
00:00:43It's unbelievable.
00:00:44How the fuck can that happen?
00:00:47Okay.
00:00:48There, that's done now.
00:00:49What?
00:00:50Okay.
00:00:50Got it.
00:00:51Okay.
00:00:51Pull it up.
00:00:53Okay.
00:00:54Okay.
00:00:54Okay.
00:01:03A few years ago, we wanted to try to help out with some activist anti-corporate activities.
00:01:10And we heard about this website called artmark.com.
00:01:13And we went there and they handed us a domain name, gwbush.com, and asked us if we might
00:01:20like to make a website that was critical of George Bush, because George Bush's real domain
00:01:25name was georgewbush.com.
00:01:27And this was 1999.
00:01:29So it was just during the campaign when he was beginning to run for president.
00:01:33And we didn't really know quite what to do.
00:01:35So we went to Bush's website and looked at it.
00:01:38And it turned out to be full of strange hypocrisies.
00:01:41Like, for example, he called himself the environmental governor of Texas.
00:01:43But we looked a little closer at his record and found out that he had actually created
00:01:49the most polluted state in the country because he dismantled the clean air laws while he was
00:01:53there.
00:01:53And actually, that's, I guess, what he's doing now nationally.
00:01:56So we thought, well, this kind of hypocrisy we can easily poke fun at by making a satire
00:02:01website.
00:02:02And we made the satire website.
00:02:03It looked exactly like Bush's, except for a few key differences.
00:02:07Like, there was a photo on the banner instead of him and his wife in front of the Capitol
00:02:12building in Texas.
00:02:14We showed him pointing the finger at black people.
00:02:17And this seemed to get him a little bit angry.
00:02:20So the Bush campaign tried to shut us down by sending us a cease and desist letter and
00:02:25by complaining to the Federal Elections Commission.
00:02:27But we were able to just take those threats and send them to the media.
00:02:32And immediately, the New York Times wrote an article and there were a whole bunch of other
00:02:35articles.
00:02:36And in fact, one reporter read these articles and at a press conference asked Bush, so what
00:02:42about this website, GWBush.com?
00:02:44What do you think of that?
00:02:46How far should these sites go?
00:02:47I mean, this particular site talks about drug use in your past.
00:02:51How far should these guys go before the fraud is closed?
00:02:54There's a lot of garbage in politics.
00:02:56And obviously, this is a garbage man.
00:02:59But how far should they go?
00:03:00I mean, they're talking about cocaine.
00:03:01There are be limits.
00:03:02There are be limits.
00:03:03There are be limits to freedom.
00:03:06But and we're aware of the site.
00:03:08And this guy's just a garbage man.
00:03:10So it was all over the place.
00:03:12Yeah, a lot of people read about it, including a guy who had another domain name called GATT.org.
00:03:17And of course, GATT is the Global Agreement on Tariffs and Trade.
00:03:20And it's the predecessor agreement to the World Trade Organization.
00:03:23And he said, if you could do this for Bush, then maybe you can also do this for the WTO.
00:03:31The WTO is supposed to be sort of a United Nations of Commerce, a conglomeration of all these countries in
00:03:38the world that get together every now and then to discuss trade policies and how exactly goods will be bought
00:03:47and sold throughout the world.
00:03:48Well, I'm sure originally the stated purpose of the WTO was to help these countries who are developing so that,
00:03:58you know, the world community can help raise them out of poverty.
00:04:02In fact, what it's done is it's allowed large corporations to go in and exploit these people even further so
00:04:09that Americans become even wealthier.
00:04:11And the people in these countries continue to struggle to get by.
00:04:16And I think that's at this point, it's upset quite a few people.
00:04:36Okay, so I got to try to remember where Sal lives.
00:04:39Um, it's a little bit complicated.
00:04:41There's, like, the snaking road up over the hills.
00:04:45And who is Sal?
00:04:47Sal is a friend who I met in San Diego.
00:04:50And, um, he moved to L.A. to work in the movie industry.
00:04:54And that's why now he does actually costuming professionally.
00:04:59Builds, like, weird suits out of, you know, pretty much any material you can imagine.
00:05:04And so when we needed a costume, I knew who to call.
00:05:18Yeah, this is it.
00:05:19Yeah.
00:05:22Maybe bring him his mail, actually.
00:05:24As long as we're at it here.
00:05:27Yeah, I don't like it.
00:05:28It looks too much like sex stuff instead of too...
00:05:32It's not very modern looking.
00:05:33Okay.
00:05:33It's got to...
00:05:34This is the future.
00:05:35This isn't about, like, straps and stuff.
00:05:37That's like dungeons and torture in the past.
00:05:39The costume is a manager's leisure suit.
00:05:43And the idea is that Hank Hardy Unruh, the representative from the World Trade Organization,
00:05:48is going to go and, uh, wear this breakaway business suit that's going to be pulled off of him during
00:05:54the middle of the keynote address of the conference.
00:05:56And then a big inflatable phallus is going to emerge from this golden suit.
00:06:01And on the end of it is a TV screen that he uses to manage sweatshops remotely.
00:06:07The reason we got invited to these things is we have a website called GATT.org.
00:06:12The GATT.org website looks a lot like the WTO website, but it is critical of the WTO.
00:06:19Most people, though, who find GATT.org by searching for the World Trade Organization, um, will go without reading it
00:06:26and will send us email directly.
00:06:28So a lot of people ask us weird questions about tariffs and trade, and we try to answer as accurately
00:06:33as we can.
00:06:34And occasionally, invitations come in from official or, you know, quasi-official organizations asking for opinions or asking us to
00:06:42attend a conference.
00:06:44And so when they ask, they really think they're talking to the WTO.
00:06:47And we respond by giving them what we think they want, which is the opinions of the WTO, as accurately
00:06:55as we can represent them.
00:06:56You know what I'm thinking, actually, looking at this?
00:07:00Is it maybe this is a zipper?
00:07:02Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
00:07:04And then he just unzips it and pulls the thing at the same time.
00:07:06Oh, that could be really good.
00:07:07Because to have it burst out of the Velcro, it might not be strong enough to burst out.
00:07:13And then he'd have to pull it.
00:07:14Part of the thing that gives us the courage to go to Tampere with this really absurd suit is that
00:07:23we already went to Salzburg, Austria, to represent the World Trade Organization at a conference on tariffs and trade.
00:07:29And so there, our representative, the same guy who is Hank Hardy Unru here, was Dr. Andreas Bickelbauer there.
00:07:37And he gave a lecture that focused on basically doing away with all customs in the name of free trade,
00:07:45like getting rid of the siesta in Spain and Italy so that business hours could be the same.
00:07:51In Italy, on the other hand, you have a totally different situation in which sleep is done during the day
00:07:58as much as at night, almost.
00:08:01And allowing people to sell their votes over the Internet to the highest bidder so that the barriers to sort
00:08:07of free trade and things like votes were out of the way.
00:08:10One possible solution is being tested in the field of American politics to streamline the grotesquely inefficient system of elections.
00:08:19And voteauction.com, in turn, employs only four people to transmit not merely information, but actual money directly to the
00:08:29consuming voter.
00:08:30It's a forum for people voluntarily to offer their vote to the highest bidder.
00:08:37And despite giving what we thought was a lecture that would immediately get us booed off stage or, you know,
00:08:43get Bickelbauer maybe even thrown in jail because people would figure out he was an imposter,
00:08:47or the exact opposite happened.
00:08:50Everybody was super polite.
00:08:51Nobody, it didn't seem like everybody, everybody even noticed that what he said was so absurd.
00:09:18So far, we thought Bickelbauer would be very extreme and people would react to it,
00:09:25and we'd get shut down, and nothing of the sort happened.
00:09:30So this time we just have to really push it, make it totally extreme.
00:09:34I mean, we keep trying to push things further to try to really clarify the positions of the WTO to
00:09:41make them very legible.
00:09:42It's one back, but this is good.
00:09:46Sarah.
00:09:54Andy.
00:09:56Andy.
00:09:58It was terrible as fire.
00:10:05I have to check the web when we get upstairs.
00:10:07Oh, my God, though, what are we going to do about this Patrick?
00:10:09We've got to watch the Patrick video.
00:10:11Um, it's weird stuff, isn't it?
00:10:16That's one way I'm putting it.
00:10:18It's really a problem.
00:10:19See, it's about the weirdest I've seen from him ever, I think.
00:10:26It looks pretty good on us.
00:10:29Yeah, it's all right.
00:10:34What we have here is that we have our Cyber Andy here, who's going to be wearing the suit.
00:10:41And I'm going to be showing all the different ways in which the management leisure suit can be useful in
00:10:48industry today and maximize leisure potential.
00:10:55Sometimes I don't think they know what the hell to expect out of me.
00:10:58Um, what I'll come up with is frequently not exactly what they, uh, had in mind, but, um, it's, uh,
00:11:11you know, it fits in perfectly with what they're, what they're going to do.
00:11:16Well, I mean, I came out of a corporate environment and a company that I really gave, you know, a
00:11:23good bit of my soul to over a long period of time, progressively.
00:11:27There were a lot of downsizing, and, of course, you know, that, the, the company I was with, I thought
00:11:33was going to take care of me, you know.
00:11:34And I realized that the bottom line is the bottom line, and there really isn't any humanity in corporate structures.
00:11:42So, therefore, I hope that maybe being part of the Yes Men might, in some way, help raise issues about
00:11:49global work issues and, uh, social issues that are being, uh, brought about by globalization, etc.
00:11:58I grew up in the suburbs here, and then I moved to Troy, uh, six years ago for a job
00:12:05at the university.
00:12:06There's a place there called the Rensselaer Polytechnic Institute, and I teach there.
00:12:11I was moving back home, really, because I'd been away.
00:12:13I'd been on the West Coast for about 12 years.
00:12:17Wait, what is this?
00:12:18Uh, this is, um, it's this, uh, SimCopter, uh, hack.
00:12:23Here it is.
00:12:24I wanted to watch this tape, because I, this, this is a tape I've been cleaning out the, uh, archives,
00:12:29you know, and I found this tape in there.
00:12:31I met Andy through a friend, actually, a mutual friend.
00:12:34Actually, two people that we both knew suggested that me and Andy get in contact with one another because we'd
00:12:41both done similar projects.
00:12:42One of the jobs that I had was at this games company called Maxis that makes SimCity.
00:12:49One of the games they were making at the time was, uh, SimCopter.
00:12:53I was in charge of the little people that run around in the game, and I made them, uh, wearing
00:12:59nothing but swim trunks.
00:13:00And they'd all be boys, and they'd be running around kissing each other.
00:13:04So, all the people who ordered this very popular video game suddenly were treated to a completely different spectacle.
00:13:11And so he, he got a lot of press attention for it, and it was seen as a kind of,
00:13:15an activist, you know, kind of statement about video games and the sort of macho nature of them.
00:13:21It all involves the unexpected appearance of some gay kissing muscle men every Friday the 13th.
00:13:26He's becoming a celebrity of sorts in the computer world, especially the gay computer world.
00:13:31And then I had done a, uh, project using Barbie dolls where we switched the voice boxes of Barbie dolls
00:13:37and G.I. Joes.
00:13:44And that ended up in G.I. Joes that said things like, I love to shop with you, and Barbie
00:13:49dolls that said things like, um, dead men tell no lies.
00:13:52And we got them back on store shelves, um, all over the country in what we called our shop-giving
00:13:58program.
00:13:58We're like Santa Claus, only less radical, because Santa Claus breaks into people's houses.
00:14:03We don't do that.
00:14:04So that when kids got them at Christmas, they were surprised to find their doll saying something other than what
00:14:09they expected.
00:14:10And the kids thought it was hilarious, you know, they loved having these crazy dolls.
00:14:14Uh, we sent out press releases, so it was in the, in the news on Christmas Day, and for the
00:14:20week following, it just went through every kind of, uh, media channel imaginable.
00:14:25The BLO, the mission of the BLO, the Barbie Liberation Organization, the BLO.
00:14:31That was real fun.
00:14:32Moi, ça m'a fait bien rire.
00:14:33Il a l'air d'un jouet qui dirait, viens te battre, et en fait, il dit.
00:14:37I love school, don't you? Let's sing with the band tonight.
00:14:40Now, we're, we're, with the Yes Men, we're calling that, that sort of basic idea, identity correction, like saying, okay,
00:14:47these things, these things that are not really presenting themselves honestly, or that hide something about their nature that's really
00:14:54scary.
00:14:55We want to, we want to bring that out, we want to show that, we want to demonstrate that, and
00:14:59so, like, for the WTO, you know, we think that the WTO is doing all these terrible things that are
00:15:05hurting people, and they're saying the exact opposite, and so, we're interested in correcting their identity in the same way
00:15:12that an identity thief steals somebody's identity to, in order to basically just engage in criminal practices.
00:15:18We target people we see as criminals, and we steal their identity to try to make them honest, or to
00:15:24try to present a more honest face.
00:15:26And so, you know, I guess this whole thing has its roots for both me and Andy, and stuff that
00:15:32we've been doing for a long time, which is trying to create public spectacles that, in some kind of poetic
00:15:38way, reveal something about our culture that's profoundly a problem.
00:15:57That must be Sal.
00:15:59Uh oh.
00:16:00Aw, dude.
00:16:02Are you okay?
00:16:03I'm fucking lost on that.
00:16:05Oh no.
00:16:06No.
00:16:08It's been a long day.
00:16:10Holy shit.
00:16:11Aw.
00:16:13Well, I probably started it in, uh, June or July.
00:16:18So, on and off for a good two to three months.
00:16:22Just a couple more pieces of Velcro, and that'll really be it.
00:16:27And, yeah, we're...
00:16:28What makes what?
00:16:28We're at the end of the line.
00:16:32Oh!
00:16:33Oh!
00:16:33Okay, look, so here, we're making a list here.
00:16:35Wednesday, we leave for Friendland early.
00:16:39So, Sunday, make, make lecture.
00:16:42Bigger, oh no, that's a big one.
00:16:44PowerPoint.
00:16:47And then, speech.
00:16:50Finish.
00:17:03It's, uh, 4.03 a.m. and, um, I guess I'll just keep working until morning.
00:17:10I feel somewhat awake.
00:17:13And then, Andy can take over again.
00:17:16Uh, we can do a round-the-clock shift, I guess.
00:17:22I'm just trying to add a few slides into the PowerPoint here.
00:17:27Um, because, actually, a lot of the things that the, sort of, uh, business leaders of the world say in
00:17:35relation to these issues are actually sort of very similar to what Unruh Hank Hardy says, even though maybe Unruh
00:17:41Hank Hardy is a little bit more frank about it.
00:17:44And, in fact, when he talked to CNBC, when he was debating an activist, Barry Coates just sort of agreed
00:17:51with what he said when he said, this is what the WTO does and this is our position.
00:17:55And Barry Coates said, well, that's funny, I, that, that's exactly right, so.
00:18:01After Salzburg, we got an email asking a representative of the WTO to appear on CNBC Market Rap Europe.
00:18:11And the producer apparently didn't notice that Gat.org was not the WTO site.
00:18:18And, uh, Grandma's Hoolitberry, which is another name that Andy just came up with, responded and, uh, of course, said,
00:18:27well, I'd be happy to go on CNBC Market Rap.
00:18:31And the producer wanted him to debate an anti-globalization protester.
00:18:37If, if the WTO is serious about addressing the issues of world poverty, it would do things completely differently than
00:18:46it is now.
00:18:47Let, let, let me, let me bring in, um, Branwith on that. Is that a fair point?
00:18:51Well, of course it is. But, you know, I think, I think Barry, as well as all the other protestors,
00:18:56are simply, in a word, focused too, too much on reality and on facts and figures.
00:19:00And I think I would, I would have to say that this is a long-term problem that comes down
00:19:05to a problem of education.
00:19:07We have to find a way to convince, uh, perhaps not the protestors, but the protestors' children to follow, uh,
00:19:15thinkers like Milton Friedman and Darwin and, uh, and so on, rather than, uh, what the protestors have been reared
00:19:22on.
00:19:22And I think that putting, um, the direction of education being put into, uh, private hands, uh, uh, concentration of
00:19:34resources in the private sector will naturally lead to this result.
00:19:38And we'll see the protestors' children being reared with an entirely different set of, of concerns.
00:19:42But let me bring you in on that, Barry.
00:19:44I mean, can I just, just say that these kind of simplistic arguments are, are really, I mean, too insulting
00:19:51to, to most people to believe.
00:19:52You know, the fact that we have a choice between Milton Friedman or A.B. Hoffman for, for where we
00:19:57get our, our source of economic history and philosophy.
00:20:00There are many, many thinkers from around the world, just not those ones employed by the WTO, that think the,
00:20:06the World Trade Organization policies are deeply damaging for the development prospects of the poorest countries.
00:20:12Let me go out, uh, to Branwyn.
00:20:15Yes.
00:20:16Um, well, I wanted to, to speak to, to Granwith's, uh, sorry, to Barry's point that there are other thinkers.
00:20:21Well, who, who actually has the power in the world, and so who is correct in this, in this kind
00:20:28of world view?
00:20:29I mean, I think the answer is, is, is easy.
00:20:31And if you look at the, the views held by myself, my organization, and, and, uh, many, many of the
00:20:37decision makers in, in the world, the powerful people,
00:20:39they happen to coincide with what I'm explaining.
00:20:43And I think this is, is enough in this sort of, uh, view.
00:20:47So, I mean, what we have here is a picture of the rich and powerful people believe a certain philosophy,
00:20:53which they then propound through the institutions in which they have a powerful voice.
00:20:58And I think this is exactly the model that is being questioned.
00:21:02And, and increasingly what there is, is a very large body of people who are concerned about these rules.
00:21:09The people on the streets of General or, or, or in Seattle are not representative of the overall movement.
00:21:15They are the tip of the iceberg.
00:21:16We did a study last year that, that looked across developing countries and found that in the space of one
00:21:22year, in 50 protests, more than a million people from developing countries were out trying to change the rules that
00:21:29were being imposed on them by the World Bank and the IMF and locked in through the World Trade Organization.
00:21:34All right, thank you. We must finish, sir, unfortunately.
00:21:35Barry Coates, thank you very much for joining us.
00:21:37And also, Graham with her, Helda Batty, and also Vernon Ellis on the line from New York.
00:21:58I'm looking for a plastic bag to protect these costumes.
00:22:05Are you English?
00:22:07Section three.
00:22:13Well, it's not exactly a garment bag, but it's a, it'll work.
00:22:21Yeah? You think this is very business-like? It's like very official.
00:22:26You had a, you had a big money.
00:22:28Okay, good. That's what I need. I need a big money watch.
00:22:33So, are you as nervous as you were for Salzburg?
00:22:38The thing is, like, even with the Salzburg thing, we went into it like, sort of, I mean, we went
00:22:44there really nervous, but the whole time kind of, it doesn't, it doesn't really sink in until you're actually there.
00:22:50Right. Well, I think it's good, you guys, like, from what I've seen of the speech, it kind of starts
00:22:55out the most normal that it is.
00:22:57Yeah. So that he can get comfortable and people, he can sort of, like, slowly work his way up into
00:23:04it.
00:23:06Son of a fucking bitch.
00:23:10Shit.
00:23:13Yeah, do you have a rag?
00:23:14Uh, fuck.
00:23:16What, uh, shit, um, uh, I have one that has shoe polish on it, but that's not right, right?
00:23:24Screen get a little paint on it?
00:23:25Yeah.
00:23:30Hmm.
00:23:34Sounds like a lawnmower. It's a little loud, yeah.
00:23:36Uh, hmm, that's not good.
00:23:39I got it.
00:23:49Uh-oh.
00:23:49Oh, look, it made a new noise. Good, good, good. Great.
00:23:53Is it great?
00:23:53Try it.
00:23:54And it doesn't work now.
00:23:56Oh, yes, yes.
00:23:57Okay.
00:23:59I'm free.
00:24:03Oh, si.
00:24:04Plus or moins en même temps.
00:24:06Uh, d'accord.
00:24:08Monsieur et Madame Servin, c'est ça?
00:24:10D'accord.
00:24:11Merci.
00:24:11Au revoir.
00:24:13Okay, 10 minutes, they're both here.
00:24:16Woof.
00:24:18Hey, Sal.
00:24:20Thanks.
00:24:23Bye.
00:24:24Bye.
00:24:26We'll see how it goes.
00:24:27Yeah.
00:24:28Yeah, sleep good and have a good time.
00:24:31See ya.
00:24:31Enjoy.
00:24:32See ya soon.
00:24:33I hope.
00:24:33Move into my room.
00:24:34Have enjoyment.
00:24:35Okay.
00:24:39Is this everything?
00:24:41Wow, look how efficient.
00:24:43Okay.
00:24:45Efficient.
00:24:46A model of efficiency right here.
00:24:51You have some, um, crap on your face right here.
00:24:53No.
00:24:54Not over here.
00:24:56Looks better.
00:24:57La, la, la.
00:25:00La, on, la.
00:25:06La, la, la.
00:25:07Mathieu, la, la.
00:25:08Ah ah, ha ah.
00:25:12Kiss the same.
00:25:13Eff.
00:25:14Ach, on a movie.
00:25:14Nice.
00:25:15Ta la.
00:25:18Nice.
00:25:19Ha ah ah.
00:25:29we arrived last night you had to take a nap you know to get some sleep i just crashed yeah
00:25:35and
00:25:36uh i went and basically scoped out the lecture site there was a sign on the door that said
00:25:42textiles of the future unruh hank hardy was the first speaker hank hardy unruh and um you know
00:25:48it all looked sort of official the coffee cups were out for the morning so i thought this is great
00:25:53i'm already i know exactly where it is we can go there i had a time i like set up
00:25:58a little timetable
00:25:59i got the you know maps of the thing and all the updated conference information um came back here
00:26:05then we went to sleep early hank was snoring immediately but i wasn't able to sleep at all
00:26:12really i just like stayed there awake in bed and occasionally i go in the bathroom and turn on
00:26:16the light and read brochures because i was like just unable to sleep and eventually i think i fell
00:26:22asleep just before waking up great
00:26:32so i'm leaving my uh wallet here
00:26:38okay let's go
00:26:43it's eight o'clock i think i really will leave it here
00:26:52are you coming
00:26:59hank it's a little early to get up it's all right i mean i thought this was vacation
00:27:05like what vacation i know they take me to philand
00:27:16when we take care of this egg for you i'll just peel it that would be nice thank you
00:27:26well you know we're behind schedule are we well a little bit it's after eight and i really wanted to
00:27:32be at the venue at eight okay but we're doing fine is it after eight it is after eight yeah
00:27:42you know pretend like
00:27:52oh great we're early oh good
00:28:00hello i'm hank hardy unruh i'm from the
00:28:02oh great nice to meet you we were expecting you oh good
00:28:07uh it's not 9 30 no it's 8 30 right
00:28:10uh but you would have a it's 8 30 now is it
00:28:17jeez it's 9 30 yes now yes no yeah the time is 9 30 yeah almost well i'm on it
00:28:26seven past nine at the moment oh my god we're an hour off
00:28:30oh my god thank you okay well we have to we start in three minutes do they know that he's
00:28:37going on now uh yeah well uh person also i was expecting oh geez okay okay we
00:28:48um i'm i'm his assistant yeah working with him we have to go take care of a few things now
00:28:56okay okay would you like to join the dinner uh yes please uh or is there a fee or no
00:29:02it's in glory
00:29:03okay yes we'll we'll join the dinner that's great um wow well we must hurry i guess yes so please
00:29:10yes
00:29:13um actually no you can't go in right now because you have to first take care of that business
00:29:17oh god see we're an hour or we're we we got five we had an hour off i have to
00:29:22do something um so
00:29:24you have to make a very important phone call right now take me five minutes and yes i'm sorry but
00:29:29uh
00:29:29but you will have your presentation starting after two minutes yes please tell them that i'll be three
00:29:33minutes late that's really incredible come on okay yeah geez this is terrible it's the stupidest i can't
00:29:58there's it's an hour's difference the time zone is different here
00:30:04it's unbelievable how the fuck can that happen okay okay there that's done now
00:30:10okay real quick the shirt uh the underwear gold underwear okay
00:30:19does that do i have to put something through here no okay uh
00:30:23here we go mm-hmm your testicles hanging out uh yeah
00:30:31okay okay okay okay okay great
00:30:37oh god okay great
00:30:41it's got a little air in it okay now the pants
00:30:43okay okay
00:30:48i'm so sorry
00:30:53our program
00:30:55for this morning
00:30:58I'm having
00:30:59you
00:31:02from Helsinki
00:31:04I've never met you before
00:31:08thank you
00:31:10terribly
00:31:12yes I have a presentation
00:31:18terribly sorry
00:31:19I think the World Trade Organization
00:31:21is supposed to know about time zones but
00:31:25somebody said
00:31:27isn't there a time difference
00:31:28and I said nope all of Europe
00:31:30same time zone
00:31:32so that convinced us all
00:31:35and we were convinced
00:31:36that it was the right time
00:31:38and we woke up this morning
00:31:39and we were running five or ten minutes late
00:31:42and then figured out that
00:31:43you know the laptop wasn't working
00:31:46no maybe we could switch the order
00:31:49can we have somebody else go
00:31:51and then I go later
00:31:51and they said okay I think we can do that
00:31:53and then they called the coffee people
00:31:55and they talked to the coffee people
00:31:56to see if the coffee was possible
00:31:58that was it
00:31:59well I have a pleasure
00:32:01I have to introduce
00:32:06our best speaker
00:32:10Mr. Sankarji Undru
00:32:12who is the mantra of business
00:32:14and the expression
00:32:15and the text
00:32:16that spoke
00:32:18the words
00:32:19Sankarji Undru
00:32:20drew up in
00:32:21Mont Teenpoli's texts
00:32:22some of the words
00:32:23about is this
00:32:27that was a
00:32:27he shared
00:32:28earlier stages
00:32:29with this part of business
00:32:31that was embodied
00:32:32to him
00:32:33as large
00:32:34interest
00:32:35and business
00:32:36mainstream
00:32:37and after all
00:32:37the mark
00:32:38of business
00:32:38administration
00:32:39became
00:32:40the joy
00:32:45Since then, he has spoken on trade matters before, very before, his current character,
00:32:55in Jesus Christ.
00:32:57The title from the 100th presentation is The Future Textants, The Future of a Lifetime
00:33:08Thank you very much.
00:33:16It's quite an honor to be here in Tampere addressing this audience of the most outstanding textile
00:33:23workers in the world today.
00:33:25I see on all the faces here today a touching childlike eagerness to tackle the biggest textiles
00:33:32questions in the world.
00:33:33How do we at the WTO fit in?
00:33:36What we want to do at the WTO is help you achieve your dollar results.
00:33:40And in just 20 minutes from now, I'm going to show you the WTO's very own solution to two
00:33:48of the very biggest problems in management.
00:33:51One, maintaining rapport with distant workforce, and two, maintaining healthful amounts of leisure.
00:33:58This solution, appropriately enough, is based in textiles.
00:34:05But how did workers ever get to be a problem?
00:34:09Before unveiling our solution, I'd like to talk a bit about the history of the worker management problem.
00:34:16We all know about the American Civil War, at least in the US.
00:34:20It was the bloodiest, least profitable war in the history of our country.
00:34:24A war in which unbelievably huge amounts of money went right down the drain, and all for textiles.
00:34:30By the 1860s, the South was utterly flush with cash.
00:34:35It had recently benefited from the cotton gin, an invention that took the seeds out of cotton,
00:34:40and the South out of its pre-industrial past.
00:34:43Hundreds of thousands of workers, previously unemployed in their countries of origin, were given useful jobs in textiles.
00:34:50Into this rosy picture, Freedom and Boone stepped, you guessed it, the North.
00:34:56Now, some Civil War apologists have said that the Civil War, for all its faults,
00:35:01at least had the effect of outlawing an involuntarily imported workforce model of work.
00:35:06Now, this model is, of course, a terrible thing.
00:35:09I, myself, am an abolitionist.
00:35:10But, in fact, there is no doubt that, left to their own devices,
00:35:15markets would have eventually replaced slavery with cleaner sources of labor.
00:35:20To prove my point, please join me on what Albert Einstein used to call a thought experiment.
00:35:28Suppose involuntarily imported labor had never been outlawed,
00:35:31that slaves still existed, and that it were easy to own one.
00:35:35What do you think it would cost today to profitably maintain a slave, say, here in Tampere?
00:35:41Let's see. A finished clothing set costs $50 at the very least.
00:35:47Two meals for McDonald's cost about $10.
00:35:50The cheapest small room probably runs for about $250 a month.
00:35:54To function well, you have to pay for your slave's health care.
00:35:57If its country of origin was polluted, for example, that might run very expensively.
00:36:01And, of course, what with child labor laws here in Finland,
00:36:04much of the youth market is simply not available.
00:36:08Now, leave the same slave back at home, let's say, Gabon.
00:36:12In Gabon, $10 pays for two weeks of food.
00:36:16$250 pays for two years of housing, not a month at best.
00:36:22$50 pays for a lifetime of budget clothing.
00:36:25And health care is, of course, cheaper.
00:36:27On top of it all, youth can be gainfully employed without restriction.
00:36:32The biggest benefit of the remote labor system, though, is to the slave him or herself.
00:36:37Because in Gabon, there is no need for the slave not to be free.
00:36:41This is primarily because there are no one-time slave transport costs to recoup,
00:36:46and so the potential losses from fleeing are limited to the slave's rudimentary training.
00:36:50So, since the slave can be free, he or she suddenly becomes a worker rather than a slave.
00:36:57Also terrific for morale is that slaves, workers, have the luxury of remaining in their native habitat
00:37:03and don't have to relocate to places where they would be subject to such unpleasantries as homesickness and racism.
00:37:10I think it's clear from our little thought experiment that if the North and South had simply let the market
00:37:16sort it out without protectionist tariffs,
00:37:19they would have quickly given up slavery for something more efficient anyhow.
00:37:23By forcing the issue, the North not only committed a terrible injustice against the freedom of the South,
00:37:28but also deprived slavery of its natural development into remote labor.
00:37:35Had the leaders of the 1860s United States understood what our leaders understand today,
00:37:40the Civil War would never have happened.
00:37:43In a world where the headquarters of a company might be in New York, Hong Kong, or Espo, Finland,
00:37:48and the workers are in Gabon, Rangu, or Estonia,
00:37:53how does a manager maintain proper rapport with the workers,
00:37:56and how does he or she ensure from a distance that workers perform their work in an ethical fashion?
00:38:02I'm about to show you an actual prototype of the WTO solution to two major management problems of today.
00:38:09Now, we all know that not even the best workplace design can help even the most astute manager keep track
00:38:15of workers.
00:38:16What you need is a solution that enables complete rapport with workers,
00:38:21especially when they're located far away.
00:38:25Mike, would you help me a moment?
00:38:51This is much better, much more comfortable.
00:38:55This is the WTO's answer to two of the major management problems,
00:38:59and we're calling it the management leisure suit.
00:39:03It's the two problems, again, how to maintain close rapport with distant workers,
00:39:08and how to remain comfortable and increase leisure activities.
00:39:13How does the management leisure suit work, besides being extremely comfortable, as I can guarantee you?
00:39:19Well, allow me to describe the suit's core features.
00:39:47This, this, is the EVA.
00:39:53The employee visualization appendage.
00:39:57It's an instantly deployable, hip-mounted device with totally hands-free operation
00:40:03that allows the manager to see his employees directly right here.
00:40:08Signals communicating the exact amounts and quality of physical work
00:40:12are transmitted not only visually right here, but directly through electric channels implanted directly into the manager.
00:40:20The workers, for their part, are fitted with corresponding transmitting chips
00:40:24that are implanted humanely directly into the shoulder.
00:40:28But the other equally important achievement of the MLS has to do with leisure.
00:40:33In the United States, leisure, another word for freedom really,
00:40:38has been decreasing steadily since the 1970s.
00:40:41The management leisure suit permits the manager to reverse this trend by letting him do his work anywhere,
00:40:47while remaining in complete touch with the workers, physically sensing what's going on in the workforce,
00:40:53on the floor, through channels implanted directly into the manager.
00:40:57Again, the manager sees the employees, but also feels what they're feeling,
00:41:03and can select where to focus in the workplace environment.
00:41:08So, in conclusion, I'd like to ask, is this a science fiction scenario?
00:41:19The answer is no.
00:41:22Everything we've seen here, everything we've been talking about, is entirely possible today.
00:41:26We can always look forward on the highways of progress towards ever-new horizons,
00:41:32with cooperation and mutual delight in the fruits of prosperity.
00:41:37I'm very excited to be here. Thank you very much.
00:41:50Thank you very much.
00:42:07Thank you very much.
00:42:32I wasn't depressed by people just swallowing it and not asking questions
00:42:35because I thought, well, that shows that you need some sort of control.
00:42:40Because here you can, you know, the WTO, me, can come in and say these amazingly hideous things
00:42:45to this group of the most educated people, like the top 0.1% education-wise people
00:42:50in the entire world in a developed country like Finland.
00:42:53These people all have PhDs or advanced degrees.
00:42:56And you can say the most atrocious things, and nobody will really react,
00:43:00and nobody will really care.
00:43:02It's like, you know, what can't corporations get away with?
00:43:18So where are we?
00:43:20Well, we're arriving in Helsinki right now.
00:43:23We left the conference this morning.
00:43:25It was just, it had driven us completely mad after dinner last night.
00:43:31I think we had to fill the dinner.
00:43:33I had to actually leave a little bit early.
00:43:35I went over to the table where Andrew, where Hank Hardy had to sit with the big men and eat.
00:43:43And I told them that we needed to leave because we had a telephone meeting with Mobutu Oblongatu immediately.
00:43:53Hi.
00:43:55Sorry about in a minute. We're supposed to meet Panduka Jibango at 10 o'clock.
00:44:00And then we both started laughing, which was really not convenient for the context.
00:44:05So we left, and then we just decided that basically, like, we couldn't figure out what else we could possibly
00:44:11do at this conference.
00:44:13So we just thought, well, let's go to Helsinki instead.
00:44:18So this is the paper on the front page.
00:44:21It just said, just discovered it said, it says, there's a seminar at the university.
00:44:25And, um, somebody talked about controlling remote workers with electrical impulsions.
00:44:32Impulsiari.
00:44:33And then you turn to the page, and that's what you get.
00:44:39And this, right here, represents the World Trade Organization.
00:44:45This is the World Trade Organization.
00:44:48The World Trade Organization.
00:44:54I went down to these Mexican border towns in the mid-'80s.
00:44:59They were called Mequidoras.
00:45:00And when they first had, you know, the sort of, the first trade agreements between Mexico and the United States,
00:45:06and everyone was saying, oh, this is going to raise Mexico out of poverty, and things were going to be
00:45:10so great.
00:45:11And within 10 years, they'd all be driving shiny new cars in Mexico.
00:45:15And I went down there and saw this incredible poverty in these Mexican border towns.
00:45:22Fifteen years later, I went back. Not a damn thing had changed.
00:45:25Here's all these workers working for all these American corporations.
00:45:29And you just go across the street, and you found people living in the same horrid conditions, the same poverty
00:45:36existing.
00:45:36And you had to ask, well, who was benefiting from this?
00:45:40Well, who benefited were these American corporations.
00:45:43During the 1990s, they became even more wealthy.
00:45:46They posted record profits, larger record profits.
00:45:49And the people in Mexico just continued to suffer.
00:45:52It was all a big scam.
00:46:01Well, we didn't know how we were to get them.
00:46:12This is the one?
00:46:13No.
00:46:14You got the wrong one.
00:46:17Shit.
00:46:18Will WTO stand up?
00:46:20Yeah. Oh, my God, it's got pictures. They're nice, too.
00:46:24Yeah. Yeah, they actually look okay at that size.
00:46:26His mom is in... Wow, but he plays them on TV.
00:46:30Yeah, this is basically the core of what we do.
00:46:33All of these newspapers and magazines have articles on the Yes Men,
00:46:38and this is why we are doing these things.
00:46:42This is why we go and do these conferences.
00:46:43It's not for the 200 people or the 100 people that might see us give the lecture,
00:46:48although we'd like them to come away with an interesting experience from the lecture.
00:46:53The reason we do it is so that people who read Bizarre magazine
00:46:57or the New York Times or Fortune or Harper's can read about it in the mainstream press.
00:47:03I mean, this is how millions of people could read about it
00:47:06and potentially get turned on to some of the ideas of anti-globalization.
00:47:11One of the problems with the Fortune thing is that it's in this,
00:47:17well, Fortune, it's like read by business people and accountants and that kind of thing,
00:47:22and that's exactly who we're supposed to be talking to in Australia in May.
00:47:29It's an accounting conference. It's a little worrisome.
00:47:45You need a new shirt and one that's not wrinkled?
00:47:47Yeah.
00:47:48Will that be good with your, um, thing?
00:47:51Do you think it'll work with your suit?
00:47:52Yeah, this one's extra large.
00:47:54Yeah, they'll all work with my suit.
00:47:55It's terrible.
00:47:56Striped, though. Is that okay?
00:47:58Yeah.
00:47:59Sure, it's okay.
00:48:00Well, then why don't you go get a shirt, then?
00:48:01I'll just get this. Wait.
00:48:03Yeah.
00:48:03It's cotton. Oh, it's not very much cotton.
00:48:05How much is it?
00:48:06I hate that.
00:48:0735%?
00:48:08It's 35%.
00:48:09It's like...
00:48:10No, it's fine for...
00:48:10It doesn't wrinkle much, then. That's nice about that.
00:48:13You can pack it in your bag without a lot of wrinkle.
00:48:15All right.
00:48:22I mean, the thing is, like, there's a question of whether he's...
00:48:24Like, at what point he recognizes you doesn't really matter.
00:48:27What we want is that moment when he does recognize you.
00:48:31So if he recognizes you here and sees that you're in the room,
00:48:34then he'll be looking back and forth at you at the screen.
00:48:37And at that point, if he recognizes you, we better say something.
00:48:45No, I think it's down here, but I don't know.
00:48:48Where is it again?
00:48:49Oh, it's right over. It must be right down in Morris.
00:48:51Remember, we walked...
00:48:52It's on the stand, and there's people in the room.
00:48:54Yeah, I think that's all right.
00:49:15Andy, hi.
00:49:16Hey, hi.
00:49:16How are you doing?
00:49:17Nice to meet you.
00:49:17Good to meet you.
00:49:18Good. Great. Yeah.
00:49:20We're in London, and we were just at the offices of the world development movement
00:49:25where we talked to Barry Coates, who's the director of the world development movement
00:49:29and who showed up on CNBC Market Rap Europe
00:49:33debating our friend here, Cranwith Hewlett-Barry,
00:49:37about the prospects of WTO and globalization.
00:49:41We kind of expected him maybe to have a glimmer of recognition immediately,
00:49:45and he didn't, OK, then we put on the tape, and he laughed at how horribly stupid it was,
00:49:54but he never realized that this wasn't really a representative of WTO.
00:49:59Even when he saw me like this, right next to it, and then we switched seats,
00:50:03and he still didn't notice, and then I had to put my face next to the thing and, like, go...
00:50:08Wait, let's just pause it here.
00:50:10OK. Hit stop.
00:50:12Is there a pause?
00:50:12Stop button.
00:50:13There's no pause.
00:50:14I don't know what I could have said after that clip.
00:50:18I mean, really.
00:50:21It's kind of, where did they get this guy from?
00:50:23Afterwards, yes.
00:50:24Might have been my first comment.
00:50:25So, did you ever figure out where they got the guy from?
00:50:29I understood that he was in the external relations department of the WTO.
00:50:35Right.
00:50:36That's what they thought, too.
00:50:37That's what they thought, as well.
00:50:39But, as it happens, he wasn't.
00:50:43Yeah.
00:50:43In fact...
00:50:44Just take one more close look.
00:50:47Oh, wait, can we...
00:50:49Is this reverse?
00:50:53No.
00:50:58I wasn't going to mention the likeness.
00:51:02You were being very polite, weren't you?
00:51:04Yeah.
00:51:06Yeah, yeah.
00:51:06He did it as a spoof.
00:51:07Yeah.
00:51:08Yeah, basically...
00:51:09That's it.
00:51:10Um...
00:51:11Oh, good.
00:51:12Good.
00:51:12We weren't sure how he would do it.
00:51:14We were really hoping you wouldn't be too offended.
00:51:16And we were like, oh, no.
00:51:17Oh, hell no.
00:51:18Oh, that's great.
00:51:19That's really...
00:51:20I was wondering, because I hadn't seen that guy before,
00:51:23and I did know some of the WTO external relations.
00:51:26People in our thinking, my God, they really put up a right one this time.
00:51:30We wanted to talk to Barry Coates as well, because he has a lot of statistics and information
00:51:36about globalization that we thought would be useful for the lecture in Australia.
00:51:41All of the WTO agreements, bar one, are all about restricting what governments can do.
00:51:48And so essentially, the whole trading system is built on the premise that the companies
00:51:55trading internationally, investing internationally, are going to be preyed upon by nasty governments.
00:52:03And really, I mean, what we have is an international system that is entirely the reverse.
00:52:08What's got squeezed out of the system is democracy, is development, is environment,
00:52:13is the kind of human values, which really ought to be the center of what we're trying to do.
00:52:20We don't kind of live to trade, you know, we live to have decent lives,
00:52:27and that ought to be the goal of our trade policy, not maximizing trade or getting rid of any impediments
00:52:33to it.
00:52:55Oh.
00:52:57Okay.
00:52:59That's good.
00:53:00I got that.
00:53:02I need to get the video.
00:53:05And I'll be off.
00:53:08Let's see.
00:53:12One of the big reasons why I'm up here is that we have the Australia gig for the Yes Men.
00:53:19And I did an animation about, you know, the recycling of post-consumer waste into hamburgers and fast food.
00:53:28So, here we go.
00:53:30The answer to the world's sustainable food future is in recycling.
00:53:34And since over half our nutrients are taken in or eliminated, valuable resources are at risk.
00:53:39By using post-consumer waste, Reburger allows essential nutrients to be offered to developing countries for greatly reduced cost.
00:53:46Uh-huh. Oh.
00:53:47Okay.
00:53:50Oh.
00:53:53Oh.
00:53:54It gets better.
00:53:55Oh.
00:53:56Wait, what was that?
00:53:58Was that another space?
00:53:59What the hell?
00:54:01I think it does the job.
00:54:03I think it does the job.
00:54:07We're here in New York because Herb Alpert, of Herb Alpert and the Tawana Brass, gave us this award.
00:54:16A bunch of money to do what, you know, the kind of stuff that we do.
00:54:20Um, so we had to come here and have dinner with him and, and, you know, get the money and,
00:54:25and thank everybody.
00:54:26And it was very nice and it was very nice and it was very surprising, but we're very pleased.
00:54:30I think we can say we're very pleased.
00:54:32Um, yeah, it was a big chunk of money.
00:54:35It's going to bankroll a lot of future activities like going to Australia.
00:54:38Oh, yeah.
00:54:39Um, yeah, so we got this chunk of money, but of course now we're also using this opportunity and this
00:54:45hotel room here in New York
00:54:46to meet up with Matt, who's been working on the PowerPoint presentation for Australia and to meet up with Patrick,
00:54:52who's been working on animations for Australia as well.
00:54:56Fortunately, we were lucky too because, uh, Snafu was in town and he's sort of a European yes man.
00:55:02He's been sort of circulating in the European scene doing yes man type activities, but, uh, it's a good thing
00:55:09he's here, here in the States, so he can go to Plattsburgh with us.
00:55:12Yes, trade liberalization is a religious undertaking, a project of faith, a crusade of sorts, and it has been ever
00:55:18since its founders declared that financial success comes from God and that wealth is a sign of divine favor.
00:55:24Now, why is starvation a problem?
00:55:28First, the facts.
00:55:29As we all know, investment and exports have been on the rise in the third world.
00:55:34There's some bad news.
00:55:36There's some really bad news that came down in the last two days.
00:55:40Um, the conference, um, the conference in Australia, the people from the conference in Australia wrote an email saying that
00:55:47the conference has been cancelled because of low enrollment.
00:55:51In some ways it's really kind of, I guess, uh, a nice thing that there was under enrollment because it
00:55:56was really a hideous conference and it seemed like a really dire thing that people would actually want to go
00:56:02to that thing.
00:56:03And so it's really encouraging for humanity that the conference actually has been cancelled.
00:56:08But at the same time, it's really, um, made things difficult for us.
00:56:12And so I wrote back to them as Hildegard West and I asked them if they would please set up
00:56:17another venue because Kinnathrung Spratt is already en route to Australia.
00:56:21So right now I'm waiting to see if they come back to us with a suggestion that they'll actually have
00:56:28a public presentation.
00:56:29But since the conference has been cancelled, now the event in Plattsburgh is kind of like, it might be the
00:56:35only venue we have for this lecture.
00:56:37And so it's really important now that we get the lecture done and sort of together.
00:56:40So it's no longer a dress rehearsal, it's actually, like, the final, you know, production.
00:56:49It's about time.
00:56:50What?
00:56:51I was so worried about your shoes.
00:56:52About what?
00:56:53This guy brought shoes.
00:56:54He brought real shoes for you.
00:56:55Look.
00:56:55Do we have the hamburgers yet?
00:56:58Uh, we have to pick them up.
00:56:59But you, you mentioned...
00:57:00They're ordered.
00:57:01They're ordered.
00:57:02Yeah, Richard ordered them already.
00:57:03That's fantastic.
00:57:04I'm just going to pick them up, right?
00:57:04Great.
00:57:05Basically, there's this guy named Richard Robbins who I met at a conference about a month ago.
00:57:10And he has written several books on sort of global, globalization.
00:57:15He was interested in having the, the WTO come speak at the economics department.
00:57:21And only he really knows that this isn't, um, really the WTO.
00:57:24Everybody else will think that it's the WTO.
00:57:26But another good thing is that it will be a hungry audience.
00:57:29So there's a good chance they are going to eat those hamburgers, which we weren't sure was actually going to
00:57:34happen with the accountants in Australia.
00:57:38You know, I think for, uh, for a look, I should probably carry these in.
00:57:43Okay.
00:57:44Can you do it?
00:57:45Yeah, I'm thinking that, uh, that you probably shouldn't be associated with the hamburgers.
00:57:49Okay.
00:57:50I'd like to thank everybody for coming.
00:57:52Um, you have many education choices.
00:57:54And, uh, we're all grateful at the WTO that you have chosen to listen to us for an hour and
00:58:01to our messages about things that will impact everyone.
00:58:04I'd like to, to say that by joining us here, you're essentially embarking with us on a mission.
00:58:11I'd like to start right at the beginning.
00:58:14As I was saying, trade liberalization is a, a project of faith.
00:58:18It's a crusade.
00:58:20And in any crusade, there are problems.
00:58:22There are invading armies.
00:58:23There are big blockades.
00:58:25And one of the, the problems that we run into in this crusade is starvation in the third world.
00:58:31You may recognize that symbol from those green bins you see, you know, where cans, bottles, blah, blah.
00:58:37The kind of recycling I'm talking about that we have developed at the WTO is not, not really this, this
00:58:44irrelevant kind of recycling,
00:58:46where the target, individual consumers like you and me, or of, uh, non-edible industrial products, is such a tiny
00:58:53part of the problem.
00:58:55Rather, we're talking about really recycling what counts, where it counts.
00:58:59To begin to understand the theory behind this, you must first realize that the human body is not really very
00:59:05efficient.
00:59:05When ingesting heavy foods, only about 20% of the nutrients are absorbed by the alimentary passageway,
00:59:13while the other 80% finds itself expelled in post-consumer byproducts.
00:59:18Already 20 years ago, NASA scientists began to tap into this nutritional gold mine
00:59:23by developing filters that could transform their astronauts' waste into healthy, hygienic, and even delicious food once again.
00:59:30With the use of this technology, a single hamburger, for example, can be eaten more than 10 times,
00:59:37providing a cumulative total of three times the nutritional value of the original fresh hamburger.
00:59:44Now again, a certain amount of cultural openness is required, um, as we investigate solutions.
00:59:50And I'd love to take any, uh, questions. Yes, you've been...
00:59:54Coming from a third world country, I found most of what you said pretty offensive.
01:00:00It's as if, uh, everyone is equal, but some are more equal than others.
01:00:05And, uh, who is to say whether people in the third world want a burger?
01:00:10You know, I, in my heart, sometimes find it to, to agree that, that cultures deserve equal consideration,
01:00:17perhaps to develop on their own terms, but, you know, we're, we're different.
01:00:21We're culturally different. We're rich, they're poor.
01:00:23This is the, the most humane solution we can come up with that stays within the market logic.
01:00:27If it's all right, I could, I could answer a portion of that, of that question as well.
01:00:31And this answers the question about desire for the product,
01:00:35because the biggest growth areas are the developing world.
01:00:38And so, uh, in fact, people do want the product.
01:00:42We, we do have a, a kind of video presentation about this that I, I came prepared to show.
01:00:48It's not, the program isn't actually completely ready yet.
01:00:54So, as you, you can see here, there's a consumer, uh, in the first world entering McDonald's
01:01:01and, uh, consuming a hamburger.
01:01:06And afterward, this is a process we're all familiar with.
01:01:10I don't, I don't need to explain it to anyone, but, you see, it's rendered out in this style
01:01:19because, uh, studies have shown that consumers, uh, are, are most responsive to 3D animation
01:01:25right now, particularly in developing cultures.
01:01:29So, as you can see, it goes through a, a piping system, a kind of, and this isn't unusual.
01:01:34We do this for oil.
01:01:35We could do this for food as well.
01:01:37And, uh, as you can see, it goes back up through the plumbing
01:01:42and emerges in a McDonald's.
01:01:44Now, the part of this video that isn't completed yet is the filtering process.
01:01:48There will be a, a very well-rendered, uh, filtering.
01:02:03And, uh, as you can see, uh, this, that might answer somebody's question from before, but
01:02:07at the McDonald's in a developing country, and in fact, in this country as well, you'd
01:02:12be able to choose, uh, the number one, number two, number three, number four, number five
01:02:16would no longer refer to combinations of food, but rather just, uh, the number of times the
01:02:22product had been recycled.
01:02:24We're lucky to be able to partner with the World Trade Organization, which, uh, you know,
01:02:29has slightly different goals.
01:02:30Of course, McDonald's goals are to profit and grow, and, uh, we hope that we can provide
01:02:35a nutritious and tasty product in the process.
01:02:38Our goals are to help McDonald's profit and grow and all other corporations.
01:02:42I think you guys, like, the WTO is kind of lacking, uh, kind of like a human element, you
01:02:49know, like, if you, if you saw, have you, like, have you ever seen starving people?
01:02:55Uh, in pictures, yes.
01:02:57Okay, but tell me, if you, if you saw somebody starving to death, you would probably think
01:03:02a lot, you know, like, that would kind of hit you in a, a sensitive, you know, place to
01:03:07say, like, oh, well, you know, maybe markets and money and this and that don't really mean
01:03:13as much, and actually, like, eating people means a little bit more, you know?
01:03:16Well, it is true that there's a personal side of it that, um, I, I have to say, in
01:03:21the WTO, there are questions that we, we have about this as human beings, but we're not as
01:03:26subject, um, uh, we have a kind of firmer grasp on theory.
01:03:30We are able, um, fortunately, to simply direct world trade in a much more theoretical way, um,
01:03:37in collaboration with our, our colleagues at, at the largest corporations.
01:03:41So, uh, you know, yes, probably if, if I went to these countries, I'd be, I'd feel, um, I,
01:03:50I'd think about things a little differently, perhaps, but, um, at the same time, I don't
01:03:55think I would forget all my schooling.
01:03:56I don't think I would forget, you know, all these theories, um, and so on.
01:03:59So, um, perhaps one day I'll do that.
01:04:02This is a moneymaker, correct?
01:04:04Yes.
01:04:05Well, it's a moneymaker, starvation solver.
01:04:07Sure.
01:04:08And how much does McDonald's pay you to come here and speak this garbage book?
01:04:12Did I ever see a mouse with an ear growing out of its back?
01:04:15How are you going to get around the cultural and legal implications of cannibalism and basically
01:04:20asking us to recycle shit?
01:04:21I think there's no ethical behavior.
01:04:24I mean, you don't have arms, that's what I think.
01:04:26I mean, that's all the, I mean, I can't believe the cognitive illness, but I'm going to
01:04:31do that.
01:04:35I can't help but kill Bert that way that my, uh, my, uh, I don't know.
01:04:38I, I, I, the way I feed my cat off my throat, I'm actually, that's actually better.
01:04:42And the people you're talking about, you know, I mean, there's not enough people here.
01:04:45I don't know, there's not enough people.
01:04:46And I just, that seems we're, we're giving them more.
01:04:48We're giving them shit, litter.
01:04:50The, the reality is that we already treat, um, people in the third world far worse than
01:04:55we treat our domestic animals.
01:04:57That's, that's, it's not saying it's right.
01:04:59It's just saying that's the reality.
01:05:10Well, after thinking about it for a little while, it seems the Plattsburgh lecture just
01:05:14went great.
01:05:15And it went exactly the way we originally expected these lectures to work, which was
01:05:20at, at a certain point, it was like light bulbs going off in the heads of the different
01:05:24people in the audience.
01:05:25And they were realizing that it was just too crazy to be real.
01:05:29And yet it was sort of based in reality.
01:05:31And so, you know, they started throwing globes at us.
01:05:34They got angry.
01:05:35They got frustrated.
01:05:36It worked exactly like we thought it would.
01:05:43They don't ask you if you believe in it.
01:05:44You don't get to vote on the World Trade Organization treaties.
01:05:47They don't let you vote on it.
01:05:49They don't give you a say in it.
01:05:50They let you listen to the, to the one-sided propaganda.
01:05:53Name me a single columnist in America who doesn't stand up and cheer under the banner
01:05:57of so-called free trade.
01:05:59There's no public discussion.
01:06:01There's no dissent in any of the parties, political parties.
01:06:04You, there's no debate.
01:06:06There's no discussion.
01:06:07There's no vote.
01:06:08In fact, the only nation which has called for a vote is Brazil and already, which is
01:06:15saying that it will not sign any more trade treaties without a plebiscite of its people.
01:06:20And the world trade barons are losing their damn minds trying to prevent this type of democracy
01:06:26from spreading planet wide.
01:06:28Because once people know what this stuff is about and get to vote on it, no one's going
01:06:33to vote themselves into poverty.
01:06:38Here we go.
01:06:40Australia, country code.
01:06:42Oops.
01:06:44Oh, Australia, 61.
01:06:46It's 61.
01:06:4761.
01:06:52Hi, this is Kenneth Rung Spratt from the WTO.
01:06:57Hello, how are you?
01:06:58Good, thanks.
01:06:59How are you?
01:06:59Where are you now?
01:07:01I'm in New York at the moment.
01:07:03New York, are you?
01:07:04Yes.
01:07:05Kenneth Rung Spratt just called the person who's coordinating Spratt's visit.
01:07:10I'm due in Hong Kong the week after this, and that date is firm, but my travel to Australia
01:07:18is as yet not firm.
01:07:20Yeah.
01:07:21She's actually, it turns out, been emailing all these people and basically calling journalists
01:07:27and getting people to attend his lecture.
01:07:29And she fully expects him to attend because she had spoken to Hildegard West, Spratt's
01:07:34assistant, and Hildegard West had told her that everything was on and Spratt was definitely
01:07:39going.
01:07:39So now we just decide we really have to go to honor this arrangement with Australia.
01:07:45So it's back on now after we totally thought it was off.
01:07:49And instead of giving this lecture that we've been planning for like nine months, we're going
01:07:53to like, you know, just disband the WTO.
01:07:59Should we get you a pair of shoes that actually are reasonable?
01:08:03I mean, they just don't look like dress shoes.
01:08:04They look like wrestling shoes.
01:08:06All right, well, there are no shoes here for you.
01:08:08Never mind.
01:08:09No, shoes are out.
01:08:10No, tie.
01:08:12Uh-huh.
01:08:13Around thin.
01:08:14Yep.
01:08:16Oh, wait, did you try this?
01:08:19Yeah.
01:08:22I did a set of these with an inkjet, and they just don't look as real.
01:08:27Something about them.
01:08:28They look kind of handmade.
01:08:31I printed off some letterhead for you.
01:08:33Nice.
01:08:34But you guys already saw that.
01:08:35And I just kept it real simple.
01:08:37That's perfect.
01:08:37So that it would show up well on the fax.
01:08:41That is the most ridiculous photo.
01:08:43It's like something really weird about this maniacal public relations guy.
01:08:47Wow, and a little bit.
01:08:48A little magnetic strip in the back.
01:08:50Oh, and WTO.
01:08:50Really beautiful.
01:08:52Wow.
01:08:53You know what I did?
01:08:54I went to Google, and I went to Google Image Search, and I typed in ID card.
01:09:01And you wouldn't believe the numbers of ID, pictures of ID cards that show up on the web.
01:09:07Wow.
01:09:07And I just went through and took a little bit from each one.
01:09:10You know, I said, all right, this one's got like a little barcode at the bottom, and this
01:09:13one uses the logo over here.
01:09:16That is so nice.
01:09:17Nice.
01:09:26Oh, bird.
01:09:27How much.
01:09:28Under.
01:09:29I know.
01:09:30Well, airplane.
01:09:33Where's the rental car?
01:09:55No, I don't know.
01:09:56I'm just really nervous because, I don't know,
01:09:59this feels different from all the other things that we've done.
01:10:01It's not like the same kind of play, fun, crazy, weird, impossible stuff.
01:10:08This is like sincere, you know?
01:10:09It's like about replacing the WTO with something better.
01:10:12Do you think that satire is more fun?
01:10:14Yeah, definitely.
01:10:16I got this feeling that it's less, for some reason,
01:10:19maybe it's less fun to be sincere.
01:10:21But it is less fun, isn't it?
01:10:23In a way, yeah.
01:10:25Maybe it's more fun to be satirical than serious.
01:10:31Yeah.
01:10:36It's about 9 o'clock in the morning,
01:10:39and this is the big day for Kenneth Rung-Sprat
01:10:41to go talk to CPA Australia and close down the WTO.
01:10:46It's kind of an exciting day for us.
01:10:48And we finally get to shut it down.
01:11:05I'm writing the local phone number for this cell phone on the business card,
01:11:09so if we give these to journalists or anybody else who wants to contact Mr. Spratt,
01:11:15they'll be able to do it in the next couple days.
01:11:20We have to leave in about 10 minutes, though.
01:11:22I know.
01:11:24I'm just going to do as little as possible.
01:11:30Okay, let's just go by there.
01:11:32We have some time yet.
01:11:33Let's just keep walking.
01:11:35Just walk straight.
01:11:36Don't look.
01:11:37Don't walk.
01:11:37Don't turn left.
01:11:39Don't.
01:11:40Oh, okay, no.
01:11:41Don't.
01:11:42Don't do that.
01:11:43Uh-oh.
01:11:45Answer it.
01:11:47Hello, Michael Bonanno here.
01:11:51Hi, Jane.
01:11:52How are you?
01:11:55All right, then.
01:11:55I guess we'll see you in just a few minutes.
01:11:58And do we just come up to level three, then?
01:12:01Great.
01:12:02Thank you very much.
01:12:03All right.
01:12:03Bye-bye.
01:12:04Run!
01:12:10Oh, wait.
01:12:10Shit, this is the building.
01:12:12Thank you for coming.
01:12:13Oh, thank you for having us.
01:12:14Sorry for the confusion and problems and everything else.
01:12:18It's to be expected these days, I think.
01:12:21No, thanks for going out of your way to arrange this.
01:12:24This is really terrific.
01:12:31Thank you all for coming.
01:12:32I'd like to thank the organizers for going out of their way to create this panel, this luncheon,
01:12:42in the face of some odds, the conference having been canceled, of course.
01:12:48And I'd especially like to begin by apologizing for a rather sudden change in the program,
01:12:55consequent upon a rather dramatic development in Geneva yesterday.
01:12:59I originally intended to transmit today an upbeat report on some new technologies that affect agribusiness in a global sense.
01:13:09Instead, I find myself the messenger of some rather disturbing news.
01:13:14The WTO will be issuing a public statement in detail by the end of the week, but the die has
01:13:20been cast.
01:13:21As of September 2002, having seen the effects of policies whose only intent was to bring greater prosperity and peace,
01:13:30the World Trade Organization, in its present form, will cease to exist.
01:13:36Over the next two years, we of the WTO will endeavor to re-found our organization along different lines,
01:13:42based in a different understanding of the purposes of world trade.
01:13:47The new organization will have as its foundation and basis the United Nations Universal Declaration of Human Rights,
01:13:54upon which we feel we can make a good foundation to ensuring that the organization will have human,
01:14:01rather than business interests, as its bottom line.
01:14:04My reaction was one of total surprise.
01:14:06We're expecting a speech more based on what the World Trade Organization does in its relation to Australian trade.
01:14:12It sort of blew me out of the water when the announcement was made that the World Trade Organization
01:14:16is significantly reinventing itself to focus on issues relating to people as opposed to economics,
01:14:25something that hopefully could be of significant benefit to the poor and needy throughout the world in all the developing
01:14:32countries.
01:14:32The UN estimates that poor countries, the poorest countries in the world,
01:14:37will lose approximately $2 billion a day because of unjust trade rules,
01:14:42many of them instituted by our own organization.
01:14:45And this is 14 times the amount that they receive in aid from developed countries.
01:14:51I thought the speech itself was compelling in terms of its information.
01:14:57I was astounded to find that they're actually going to dismantle the WTO.
01:15:02I was also amazed to see that there was an omission that perhaps it had failed.
01:15:07It's going to have a huge effect on international business,
01:15:10and particularly for us as an organization, I feel.
01:15:13The hardest thing I find will be the balance that, let's say, the US, EU and Japan,
01:15:20in terms of being major components of the world economy,
01:15:24the effect, you know, will they really change in terms of this new organization,
01:15:27and will there actually be genuine change and perhaps a benefit, you know, to the world's poorest countries.
01:15:34I must admit I'm a cynic with regards to that occurring.
01:15:38Liberalization, the process of liberalization,
01:15:40often enables the knowledge of the poor to be converted into the property of global corporations.
01:15:47Specific statistics are rather shocking.
01:15:49Out of 26,000 patents applied for in Africa in 2000 and 2001,
01:15:58only 31 were from residents of Africa.
01:16:02The rest were from residents of first world countries.
01:16:0531 out of 26,000 patent applications.
01:16:09It wasn't what I was expecting.
01:16:11I was expecting something on agribusiness and what the World Trade Organization does,
01:16:15but I'd have to say I believe it's fairly positive
01:16:19because I think that, as the gentleman said,
01:16:23the strong are getting stronger and the weaker getting weaker
01:16:27and you can't let that keep on going.
01:16:29And even we notice it here in Australia
01:16:31where some of the trade arrangements that are made,
01:16:34if you're powerful, you can get whatever you like,
01:16:36and if you're not, you can't.
01:16:38And it's just the world with the population we've got can't keep going that way.
01:16:42So I think it was fairly positive
01:16:43and I think it's a very brave decision by an organization
01:16:46to admit that they've been going down the wrong track
01:16:48and dissolve themselves and start to look for something different.
01:16:51And I think it's fantastic.
01:16:54Disparity is growing between rich and poor.
01:16:56The richest fifth have 80% of the world's income
01:16:59and the poorest fifth have 1%.
01:17:01This gap, we all know this figure,
01:17:03but we don't always remember that this gap has actually doubled since 1960.
01:17:09More and more thinkers are therefore noting
01:17:12that there is no evidence that liberalization favors growth
01:17:16or benefits the poor.
01:17:17I think we're all generally aware of increases in poverty
01:17:20and low living standards and issues faced by developing countries.
01:17:23And what Mr. Spratt, I think, had to say today
01:17:26really gives a terrific sign of hope for what I think we all aspire to,
01:17:31and that's a global economy that benefits all people.
01:17:43Now, after protracted and detailed review of current trade policy,
01:17:48the World Trade Organization has decided to affect
01:17:51a cessation of all operations to be accomplished
01:17:55over the next four months, culminating by the end of September.
01:18:00Well, I think that the Yes Men have kind of played out their course
01:18:05in relation to the World Trade Organization for the moment.
01:18:08You never know when we might get another invitation.
01:18:11We're lucky to be able to provide a sort of sense of closure
01:18:14by ending the WTO.
01:18:16We also hope that other people will just start doing the same things
01:18:19in all kinds of different contexts,
01:18:21you know, impersonating whoever holds power
01:18:24that needs to be criticized.
01:18:27So if the opportunity arises, we're just going to keep doing it.
01:18:31We're going to go and be the Yes Men again,
01:18:34or I should say be the WTO again at another event.
01:18:37The future is bright for the Yes Men.
01:18:39The future of the world is a different story.
01:18:43The future of the world is a different story.
01:19:18No, this isn't the way he usually dresses.
01:19:21He works for the World Trade Organization, you know, the WTO.
01:19:25He works, see, we're at a conference,
01:19:28and he's demonstrating a new kind of technology.
01:19:32This is, well, it's a device to measure employee working
01:19:37in less developed countries.
01:19:39There's a thing here where on this screen I can see...
01:19:47See, he watches people working there.
01:19:50And they have little devices that give them shocks.
01:19:54It's just regular fabric.
01:19:56In the future, it'll be sensitive, smart fabric.
01:19:59It's a little hot, but...
01:20:02That one looks better.
01:20:03Oh, la, la, la, la, la.
01:20:05Oh, la, la, la.
01:20:06Quelle joie, Sydney, la veraine de mes enfants.
01:20:10À la télé, papa aime la politique.
01:20:13Mama, elle, toi, toi, Instagram mantWho.
01:20:16Mais papa ça ne sue pas pas д'enir quand
01:20:18On se branche sur le c1p3.
01:20:21Oh, la, la, la, la, la.
01:20:23Oh, la, la, la, la, la.
01:20:25Family
01:20:26Comment serait-ce que personne ne s'est pas rendu ?
01:20:32Oh la la la, quelle famille
01:20:34Oh la la la, quelle famille
01:20:37Quelle joie finie avec les enfants
01:20:42On se dispute tout bien nos vies
01:20:45C'est notre façon de s'aimer
01:20:47Mais si la rive du gros ennuis
01:20:50Tout le monde se trouve à demander
01:20:52Oh la la la, quelle famille
01:20:55Oh la la la, quelle famille
01:20:57Qui va du temps et que j'aime à la folie
01:21:02Oh la la la, quelle famille
01:21:06Oh la la la, quelle famille
01:21:08Et que je voudrais garder toute la vie
01:21:13Oh la la, quelle famille
01:21:16Oh la la, quelle famille
01:21:18Et que je voudrais garder toute ma vie
01:21:51Sous-titres par Jérémy Diaz
01:21:53Sous-titres par Jérémy Diaz
01:22:01Sous-titres par Jérémy Diaz
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