00:13Did you three just escape from the shallow grave?
00:20Self is gonna be here any minute.
00:23Self Salamanca was my co-star on Sing It Loud.
00:28I would have been lost in L.A. without her.
00:31I mean, she was like my family.
00:34Except I wasn't embarrassed to be seen with her.
00:39Okay, you all need to change, you reek.
00:43Well, we had to mulch the roses.
00:45You know me and my roses. I just care to mulch.
00:51Hey.
00:53Oh, Maddie, no!
00:56Hey.
00:58I guess I am the only one in this family who cares about making a good impression on our guest.
01:03Not so fast.
01:10Looks like somebody has a crush on Self.
01:14America has a crush on Self.
01:17I'm the guy who has a shot.
01:23So, are you as excited about seeing my L.A.P.F.F. as I am?
01:29Um, actually, Self can be a bit much.
01:40There's my P.F.W.L.I.W.N.
01:44I'm sorry, what?
01:46Best friend forever who lives in Wisconsin now?
01:51Mr. and Mrs. Rooney, great house.
01:55You don't even know.
01:56Well, actually, Self, we live here, so we do know.
02:01No.
02:02No, you don't.
02:04I'm from Hollywood.
02:05I see beauty more clearly.
02:09I see beauty very clearly, standing right in my living room.
02:16A rose to thank you for the hours of joy I get watching your show.
02:21You watch Raise the Roof.
02:23So sweet.
02:25But don't get your hopes up.
02:28I'm 16.
02:29Really?
02:30Because you don't look a day over gorgeous.
02:44I'm up with the sunshine.
02:47I lace up my hot sauce.
02:50Slam dunk, ready or not.
02:53Yeah, show me what you got.
02:55I'm under the spotlight.
02:57I tell you, come on and follow.
03:01You dance to your own beat.
03:04I'll sing the melody when you say yeah.
03:09I say no when you say so.
03:14All I want to do is go, go, go.
03:17You, you, you're the half of me.
03:21Me, the half will never be.
03:23Me, the half will never be.
03:27You, you, you, you're the half of me.
03:31Me, the half will always lead.
03:35And we both know you're better in stereo.
03:47Class of 89, reunions this Saturday night.
03:52Sign up here to volunteer.
03:55Don't make me use my whistle.
04:01I am so excited for your reunion.
04:04Thank you, honey.
04:06You know, um, I was kind of a big deal in high school.
04:10Also, things might get a little crazy town when primetime Pete Rooney rolls in.
04:16Okay, I'm a long-time resident of crazy town, so I think I'll be okay primetime.
04:25It's time to put the Bray and Olympics trophy in the school's case.
04:30Joint custody just, it isn't working out, Artie.
04:33I'm happy to keep it at the school if it prevents you from eating cereal out of it.
04:39I only did that once, and it tasted like victory.
04:47With raisins.
04:54Dang it!
04:55Case won't open.
04:57Guess I'll have to keep it in my house.
04:59Ha, ha, ha, ha.
05:05Nice try.
05:14What is that?
05:22It's beautiful.
05:25And unexpectedly sticky.
05:31You hold in your hand the porcupine prism, which will lead you to the key of power.
05:41According to Ridgewood lore, the key of power unlocks locker C-23.
05:47Legend states that visionary math geeks created the key in 1989.
05:53Then hit it where it could only be found by the chosen one.
05:57I am the chosen one.
06:02We have to get into locker C-23.
06:06The scroll says the prism will guide us to the key of power on the first night of the first
06:12month in the year of the snake.
06:15Wait!
06:17That's this Saturday.
06:19How do we get into school on a Saturday night?
06:22Saturday night.
06:25Sign up for your own Coach Rooney's 25th reunion.
06:30Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait.
06:33I have to volunteer for my dad's reunion.
06:35Not before I can volunteer for my mom's reunion.
06:40Well, thank you, boys.
06:43No, thank you, Father.
06:47See you Saturday night, wad bag.
06:53And next period.
07:01So there we are, shooting the tropical episode of Sing It Loud.
07:06And the whole cast of Sing It Loud.
07:14The shipwrecked.
07:17Yeah, but then, oh, but then, we heard the monkeys singing the theme song to Sing It Loud.
07:33It was like Toad's Hilaire.
07:36That show is so five minutes ago.
07:41Let's talk about your new show, self.
07:44Oh, you mean Raise the Roof.
08:00Raise the Roof is about four lady carpenters who build houses by day and sing by night,
08:06but still find time to solve crimes and compete in beauty passions.
08:10I don't know how they do it.
08:19Hey, you.
08:20Hey, you back.
08:23People, people.
08:27Diggy and I recently decided that we're in like,
08:30but we're just keeping it on the DEL.
08:33Who else needs to know?
08:34I'm in like.
08:36I want the world to know.
08:38I know it.
08:40He knows it.
08:40And we like it that way.
08:42I hate it this way.
08:46Um, so, you are about to meet Liv's best friend, South Salamanca.
08:51You're probably not going to like her, but just do me a favor.
08:54I'd do anything for the girl I like.
09:05Yeah, so, um, just when we go ahead, just be nice to her.
09:09Sure.
09:10I like doing favors for people I like.
09:16Okay, one hug, but just because you're really cute right now.
09:21Person!
09:25Oh, no, that was just a lamppost.
09:33Yeah, so, there she is.
09:35Prepare to be ignored, because she really only listens to Liv.
09:40And what is all this yum-yum soup?
09:47Uh-huh.
09:49Um, so, Diggy, this is South Salamanca.
09:53Hi, nice to meet you.
09:55I love your show.
09:56You watch my show?
09:59You watch her show?
10:02It's really cool to meet you in person.
10:05Well, it's cool to be met.
10:07You don't even know.
10:12Wow, gorgeous brown eyes.
10:15Thanks.
10:17My mom calls them her little chocolate chips.
10:25What are you drinking there, punch?
10:27Let me freshen that up.
10:34Wow, I was not expecting that in Wisconsin.
10:3710,000 cows and one good-looking side of beef.
10:49Karen, uh, wait.
10:52I just wanted to tell you that Amy Becker is going to be here tonight.
10:58She and Prime Time were kind of a thing.
11:01I don't want you to be jealous.
11:04Oh, mama don't get jelly.
11:08So you're not going to chomp ice all night like you do when you get nervous?
11:12Mama also don't get nervy.
11:16And you're going to speak normally in front of my friends, right?
11:22Mama might.
11:34You weren't kidding.
11:39Watch this, honey.
11:41What time is it?
11:43Rock!
11:46Rock!
11:52You must be Amy, Pete Rooney's ex-girlfriend.
11:56Be Pete Rooney?
11:59I wish.
12:02No, I'm Amy Smalls.
12:05He dated Amy Becker.
12:07Amy!
12:09This woman wants to meet you!
12:12Oh!
12:28Karen?
12:29Karen Rooney?
12:32Oh, you must be Petey's wife.
12:35I'm Amy Becker.
12:36It's so nice to meet you.
12:42Amy!
12:43Amy!
12:44So good to see you again.
12:47Petey!
12:48Oh!
12:51How do you still look so good?
12:54I thought I was a swimsuit model.
12:58You're a swimsuit model?
13:01That just put me through med school.
13:06Swimsuit model, doctor.
13:09Good for you, good for you.
13:22So, here on the basketball team.
13:25Um, actually, I'm the captain.
13:29Well, aye, aye, captain.
13:41Okay, how upset would you be if I threw south so far she became north?
13:48Sorry, what?
13:49She's all up on Dickie, and she needs to not be.
13:55Okay, well, then Maddie just talked to her.
13:58I mean, all you have to do is say that he's your boyfriend.
14:01Okay?
14:01Say it with me.
14:03Boyfriend.
14:07Diggie and I don't play fast and loose with language like that.
14:11Listen to yourself.
14:13No wonder Sal thinks he's available.
14:15Okay, well, can't you, like, talk to her and tell her to back off?
14:19I mean, she listens to you.
14:21You once talked her into wearing a parrot as a hat to the Sing It Loud premiere.
14:27Yeah, I didn't want her wearing the same bird as me.
14:31So, you'll talk to her and tell her to stay away from my friend-boy?
14:38Friend-boy?
14:40Okay, Maddie, Sal is not the problem here.
14:43You are.
14:44I mean, it is as clear as my skin after a facial.
14:47Or any time, really.
14:53Fine, I'll talk to her.
14:55By the way, your face is really blotchy right now.
15:08The instructions say to place the prism on top of a janitor's mop right here
15:13and wait for the moon glow to hit it.
15:15Well, then, we wait.
15:18I spy with my little eye something...
15:24The prism!
15:24I knew that was too obvious.
15:28No! Look! The prism!
15:31The prism!
15:54I spy with my little eye the key of power.
16:03It is mine!
16:05I alone will unearth the secrets of Locker C-23.
16:10Is that Liv holding a go-to-prong with me, arty sign?
16:16Oh, I know she's not there, but still I must turn!
16:28Two, three, four.
16:30What you gonna do when your house is crumbling?
16:33What you gonna do when the world is rumbling?
16:37What you gonna do when you're looking for the truth?
16:40Time to put down your tools.
16:42Pick up your mics and raise the roof.
16:52What?
16:55Maddie told me to be nice to Sal, so I've been hanging out with her all night.
17:00Who's racking up major brownie points with this lady?
17:04This guy.
17:08Sal!
17:11Can I talk to you for a second?
17:14Sure thing.
17:15Keep my step warm.
17:28I see what you're doing, my man.
17:31Game!
17:32Recognize his game!
17:36Why were you in there?
17:39Because I wouldn't have your attention if I just walked up the stairs, now would I?
17:48Stay away from Sal.
17:50My sister might have a crush on you, but I will crush you!
17:57So, I just want to talk to you about Diggy.
18:01Oh, let me start.
18:03He is good looking, and he can sing?
18:06You don't even know.
18:08I don't even know.
18:12Yeah, so listen.
18:15He's kind of...
18:16It's like, um...
18:19He's...
18:20I mean, you know, he's like a...
18:22He's sort of...
18:23It's mostly...
18:24So, uh...
18:26Yeah!
18:28Yeah!
18:30Nailed that.
18:33So, does he have a girlfriend?
18:38Hmm...
18:39Failed that.
18:42Oh!
18:44Does Diggy have a girlfriend?
18:46Wow.
18:47Interesting.
18:50Um...
18:51I mean, that's a really charged and labely word, you know?
18:57You don't even know what I know, but you know what I know?
19:00He is C to the U to the T-A-K-Y-U-T!
19:10He's right.
19:11He is cute.
19:13Be ashamed if something were to happen to him.
19:25So, you ready to see me open, lock a C-23 with the key of power?
19:32Never underestimate a ginger!
19:35We have paprika, my blood!
19:45Hey, Mom.
19:47You okay?
19:49Oh, I'm fine.
19:55Mom, come on.
19:57I know that look.
19:59I've worn that look.
20:01What's wrong?
20:04I'm just sitting here wondering how I'm supposed to measure up to a supermodel-slash-doctor.
20:10Yeah, I saw her.
20:13Nice work, Dad.
20:18What?
20:21You are a few things she's not.
20:24You're funny and smart and pretty darn cool.
20:30Thank you, honey.
20:34What else am I?
20:37A little meaty right now.
20:42But you're also a great mom.
20:46That's very sweet.
20:48It's one other thing.
20:50Dad married you.
20:54Well, he did, didn't he?
20:56He could have married Christy Brinkley in there, and instead he chose Carol Burnett.
21:04I have no idea who either of those people are.
21:10If it makes you happy, go with it.
21:14Tell your mommy you've rubbed her.
21:20Artie.
21:27Oh, there you are.
21:30Are you okay?
21:31You've been chomping ice all night.
21:35I just needed a minute, but I'm better than ever.
21:39May I present for their throwback dance, our prom king and queen, Pete Rooney and Amy Becker.
21:48There you are.
21:49There you are.
21:51There you are.
21:59There you are.
22:01There you are.
22:05There you are.
22:07There you are.
22:09There you are.
22:11There you are.
22:12There you are.
22:12There you are.
22:14There you are.
22:15There you are.
22:17There you are.
22:17There you are.
22:18There you are.
22:26Oh, no, I'm too late.
22:29I'm afraid so, Joey.
22:31But you've got a good view as I meet my destiny.
22:42Did not see that coming.
22:44My inability to take the stairs in a timely fashion has saved me once again.
22:51And now, my destiny awaits.
23:03It worked!
23:06Class of 89, burn!
23:15We got my own kid!
23:19How funny is that?
23:23Arnie, is this that nice boy, Joey, you're always going on and on about?
23:30I do not quit talking, Mom!
23:34Did your mommy just say, you love me?
23:41Come on, gang!
23:42Let's go, Pants Principal Fickman!
23:49South didn't get it when I told her to leave Diggy alone.
23:53Now, I knew she'd listen to Liv, who was conveniently off looking for vegan fudge.
23:57Gosh, this was the perfect swap opportunity.
24:01Now, I know that's a live word, but I'm just getting into character.
24:09Feds are still there, right?
24:29Hey!
24:30Hey!
24:31Hey!
24:32Hey!
24:34Hey!
24:35Hey, Sal!
24:36It's your DFF-Q-Y-Z, Liv!
24:41What does that mean?
24:43It's your best friend forever, Quill.
24:48Yuck, zoo.
24:49So, anyway, I just wanted to say, maybe you should, like, back up off Diggy.
24:55Like now, Zs.
24:56Okay, Zs?
24:57Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha,
25:07ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha,
25:08ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha,
25:09ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha,
25:09ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha,
25:12ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha
25:23back up off you what you mean she was flirting with me are you dead
25:35and what's the big deal do you have a girlfriend or something I think I'll
25:42let live answer that live yeah answer the question live well two lives does Maddie
26:00know about her please two lives like I would ever wear this outfit you know that you're
26:09here can you please talk to her no Maddie this is ridiculous okay you know what I am going
26:18to put this in terms that you can understand ready it is time to step up to the hoop and
26:24swing for this board's thing can you just say it
26:36okay
26:48um diggy is my
26:58boyfriend
27:04yes finally
27:10hear that everybody Maddie Rooney is my girlfriend
27:36okay so when I pictured that moment in my head he wasn't running away screaming
27:43I did it I'm so proud of you Maddie now please take this off
27:50yeah way to go diggy is a total score and no damage there's tons of other fish in the sea
27:58for me
28:00how about a guppy
28:06here to join me in the moonlight for a juice box though sure why not
28:16so you really a fan of my show oh you don't even know
28:31hey man hello
28:34Arlie
28:35did you spend all weekend talking about me and your mommy
28:41my mother and I are no longer on speaking terms
28:45at least until taco Tuesday
28:51listen wad bag I know we had our differences the other night but
28:55we sure did make quite a team
28:58speak for yourself Rooney I'd attest you with heavy fiber in my being
29:03and I'm gonna delete you from my phone
29:07the fact that I was even in there tells me everything I need to know
29:18do you
29:24you
29:26you
29:28you
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