- 7 hours ago
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00:00You see what I make you?
00:01You sure another man can do the job?
00:04I want you.
00:06Now.
00:08Please.
00:09Give it to me.
00:16If my match today is powerful enough, maybe I can escape the arranged marriage.
00:23Welcome.
00:24This is my last chance.
00:27Could it be me?
00:29Mad.
00:29If I could marry one of them, either one would be worth it.
00:32Watch me while I work, work, work.
00:35Congratulations, Nora.
00:37Invitica AI has matched you with Gavin Winters, Invitica's chief operating officer.
00:44Okay, this might work.
00:46And Bianca is matched with Elvis Blythe, a janitor.
00:50How dare the AI match Nora with a billionaire and I'm stuck with a piss poor janitor?
00:56Hey, babe.
00:58Gavin's the name.
00:59Money's the game.
01:01Ten billion a year, to be exact.
01:03Bet you're glad you landed on stud like me.
01:05Sir, Gavin is Invitica's COO.
01:08He could have seen your last year global exec summit.
01:10Aren't you afraid he'll recognize you?
01:12Invitica's just one of many companies I have under Mr. S Holdings.
01:16Our COO would never find out who I really am.
01:21The algorithm got it all wrong.
01:24You deserve to be with someone in your league.
01:27Not this discount, Cinderella.
01:29Who doesn't love an upgrade, right?
01:31Someone I could call for one.
01:34You could be my only, only.
01:37Thanks.
01:39This outcome is unexpected.
01:41Interesting.
01:42Don't worry, poor little Cinderella.
01:45The algorithm can't predict everything.
01:47Ready for Dad to marry you off to some old geezer?
01:51Is this really the end?
01:56That janitor?
01:57He is Bianca's match.
01:59Fine.
02:00I'll take him.
02:01My fate is mine to decide.
02:03I'm getting married today.
02:05What's she gonna do?
02:11Just play along?
02:14What?
02:19What?
02:20What a surprise.
02:22Beautiful.
02:24And such a fighter.
02:25Interesting.
02:26Nora!
02:27What the hell are you doing?
02:28Get that trash trucker away from my daughter, now!
02:31What a joke!
02:33A poor Tanner actually married into the Hawthorne family?
02:38Do you think maybe you'd consider marrying me?
02:42My AI didn't account for her.
02:45Which makes her the perfect test subject.
02:48Look at me, princess.
02:48I'm just a janitor.
02:50Your dress costs more than my life savings.
02:53Are you sure you want to trade a millionaire for a shoebox apartment?
02:58That perfect algorithm is a scam.
03:01It knows nothing about true love.
03:05True love can be modeled.
03:07It just requires a more complex set of code.
03:10Okay, Mr. Janitor.
03:13I'm not the line of code, though.
03:15Is she doubting my data?
03:17I love turning a doubter into a believer.
03:21Alright.
03:22Let's make a bet.
03:23A one-year marriage contract.
03:25Yes, I've fallen in love with you.
03:27You win.
03:28And, you'll get half.
03:30Everything I own.
03:31If you really don't die.
03:34Of what?
03:36A mop and a bucket?
03:38Where does a janitor like you get so much confidence from?
03:42Tell you what.
03:43If I fall for you, you get half the money.
03:46You.
03:46I feel.
03:48I like those odds.
03:52I'll take this janitor's pride and his bet.
03:55Anything's better than my dad's deals.
04:05We're getting married!
04:06No!
04:08No, Victor!
04:13Let the games begin, Miss Blythe.
04:21Boss, that makeup took you five hours.
04:24You really just gonna wash it off?
04:27I need to start looking my best,
04:29once I plant the seed of attraction in her heart
04:31and grow into love.
04:33I'm winning this bet.
04:37Marrying the janitor.
04:38You have made us the laughing stock valley.
04:42Nora, you told that loser the marriage is off.
04:45That's too bad.
04:46We already signed the papers.
04:48I guess I'm officially a trash truck as well.
04:52Fine.
04:53But when it all falls apart,
04:54don't come crawling back to us,
04:56begging for forgiveness.
04:58You.
04:59Throw out our luggage.
05:02Please.
05:03No, we-
05:03Stop.
05:07Stop.
05:10Stop it.
05:15Stop it.
05:18Now that you're a janitor's wife,
05:20you should get used to sleeping on the streets.
05:23Sure you can handle being homeless, sis?
05:25Stay away from her, Bianca.
05:27Poverty stinks.
05:30And it's contagious.
05:32Oh, my God.
05:34Has anyone seen my sister's broke janitor husband?
05:37I know.
05:38He's off-scrubbing toilets somewhere.
05:40Wait for them to ask him to move.
05:44Where's your beloved janitor?
05:46He isn't backing out now, is he?
05:49Where are you, Elvis?
05:50Watch out.
05:51You don't know that I fulfill the abuse.
05:56So I go to the room of people who have rooms of people that they love one day.
06:00Do it.
06:02Just because we check the guns at the door doesn't mean our brains will change from hand grenades.
06:07You're loving under psychopaths sitting next to you.
06:10You're loving under murderers sitting next to you.
06:13You think I'd get it sitting next to you.
06:16Wait.
06:16Those eyes.
06:18Please don't forget.
06:20Those muscles.
06:22Is this the man I just married?
06:25Whoa, he's- he's handsome.
06:31Hey!
06:34Are you okay?
06:35Why did you jump in the way?
06:36I have to protect my new bride, don't I?
06:39Is this what it's like to be cared for?
06:41No.
06:42Don't fall for it, Nora.
06:43He's just your contract husband.
06:46Winning this bet is going to be a piece of cake.
06:49Fuck.
06:50The janitor is way too hot for a homely bitch like Nora.
06:57You literally just used me as a human shield.
06:59Get real, babe.
07:01This brain is worth billions to Invitica.
07:04I'm not some cheap janitor whose life costs five bucks.
07:07You're right.
07:08Brains beat looks.
07:10This shit scrubber might have a nice body,
07:12but his bank account is malnourished.
07:20Courses?
07:21Gamma's money really does grow a line freeze.
07:24My husband is the future of Silicon Valley.
07:27He might even surpass Mr. S as the richest man alive.
07:31Surpass me?
07:33Gavin's lucky he's even breathing the same air as me.
07:35Mr. S?
07:37That's an ambitious goal.
07:38Oh, look, the janitor has opinions now.
07:41Either way, you're nothing but a sewer rat next to a guy like me.
07:44It's a shame you'll never get behind the wheel of this thing.
07:46You'll see how different we really are.
07:48A Porsche doesn't make you a man.
07:50It just makes you a coward in a faster car.
07:53Oh, how poetic.
07:55Spoken like a true loser's fight.
07:58Still acting tough?
07:59Don't tell me.
08:01You two are actually planning to walk home.
08:06Bring out my car.
08:21Get out of here.
08:23What the hell is that thing?
08:26A garbage truck for a professional garbage sweeper.
08:29How perfect.
08:32Let's get out of here.
08:37I'll just make it on my own.
08:39Come on.
08:40I can't blame them.
08:42I'll just name them on my throne.
08:46I'm sorry about this.
08:48Hey, don't apologize.
08:49This is super cool.
08:51I've never been in a car like this before.
08:53I'm just got to get to my throne.
08:55I am the latest colors.
08:56I sing the newest songs.
08:58I read all the lyrics so I can sing along.
09:00I am the latest colors.
09:02I stand above my throne.
09:03Waiting or an invite to never come along.
09:05I am the latest colors.
09:07I sing the newest songs.
09:09I read all the lyrics so I can sing along.
09:11I am the latest colors.
09:12I hate the newest songs.
09:14I can stand the lyrics.
09:15I'd never sing along.
09:16I'll never sing along.
09:19Lucas, I asked for a small house, not a coffin.
09:22It's a nice place.
09:24For a janitor.
09:25Make yourself at home.
09:26It's only one bedroom so you'll sleep there and I'll take the couch.
09:31I feel bad making you sleep here every night.
09:35I couldn't do that.
09:36So you'd rather we share the bed?
09:38No.
09:39I didn't mean that.
09:40It's just I...
09:43Whatever makes you feel good.
09:44I don't know.
09:46I'm just going to get some clothes out.
09:50Peach flavored lube?
09:51I'll just make it on my own.
09:55I can't blame them.
09:57I'll just make them on my throat.
09:59You sure did come prepare for our first night together, didn't you?
10:02Just give it back.
10:05No.
10:06Give it back.
10:06Hey!
10:07Come on!
10:08Just gasp!
10:08Give it back!
10:11Wow.
10:12His chest.
10:14It feels amazing.
10:16You really can't wait, can you?
10:17I don't know.
10:19We're married now.
10:20We'll use it sooner or later, you know?
10:25Better or later.
10:37I'd say the sooner the better.
10:39I need some water.
10:40Yeah.
10:45How cute.
10:46I still win this round, though.
10:49It's only a matter of time before you fall for me.
10:58Damn it.
10:59He goes shirtless just to fix a pipe?
11:02Well, I'm not complaining.
11:05Look at this muscle.
11:07He's too fine.
11:12Oh!
11:13Allison!
11:13Oh, my God!
11:15Oh, my God!
11:17Oh, my God!
11:20Oh, my God!
11:23Oh, my God!
11:24No, I'm so sorry.
11:25I didn't know you were there.
11:27Oh, my God.
11:28Oh, my God.
11:29She's perfect.
11:29She's hot.
11:33If you think ogling after me after torpedoing me with water is going to make me go in love with
11:37you,
11:37Oh, my God.
11:37You're sorely mistaken.
11:39Oh, my God.
11:40You turn your back on tomorrow.
11:42Next song.
11:43Oh, my God.
11:48Those arms are wider than my waist.
11:51Are janitors supposed to be built like that?
11:54Now hold still and maybe let me enjoy my perks.
12:00Sorry for getting you high.
12:02I'm usually a lot better at fixing things.
12:05No, no, no.
12:06Fix your abs there.
12:07Perfect.
12:10The pipe.
12:11I meant the pipe.
12:13Is the pipe fixed?
12:15Um, I'm just going to go back to my room.
12:17It's freezing me here anyway.
12:19I'm soaking wet.
12:20So...
12:21There you go.
12:23You're the only one you are.
12:28What is he trying to do to me?
12:31Alright, if you want to build heat in your core, you have to engage it.
12:34Sure.
12:35Yoga can give me warmth.
12:38Can you not stand so close?
12:40How else am I supposed to correct your form?
12:42My form.
12:44What, are you a Yomi now?
12:45I thought you were a janitor.
12:47I guess I'm full of surprises.
12:48I'm going to spread your stance a bit.
12:53Ready?
12:58This is punishment.
13:00I touched his abs for three seconds.
13:02And now his hands are grabbing my butt.
13:05Good. Now, uh, downward dog.
13:08Deeper.
13:10I can't.
13:12Hold it.
13:13Don't come up.
13:15Please.
13:16It hurts.
13:18Damn it, Nora.
13:19Don't make that noise.
13:21Wow, you're a lot tighter than I thought.
13:24Oh, babe.
13:25I'm trying to go home.
13:28All of my chains I spent on you.
13:32Heart rate 140.
13:34Respiratory rate 28%.
13:38Skin conductivity 40%.
13:42Nora, your body feels a whole lot like I'm winning this bet.
13:45No, no.
13:46It's the workout.
13:48I'm going to win the bet.
13:50Just you.
13:51Wait.
13:54Why are your hands shaking?
13:56You mean to tell me that your heart isn't beating like a snare drum because of me?
14:01Fine.
14:02It is because of you.
14:07What?
14:09Insane.
14:10Inside.
14:11The danger gets me high.
14:13What about your little friend?
14:15Why is your little friend so...
14:18hard?
14:20She's a menace.
14:22I was trying to break her, but...
14:24I'm the one losing control.
14:27Said him after that for himself.
14:30Whoa-ho-ho.
14:31Hello there, buddy.
14:32Hey...
14:33Who's the one losing control now?
14:37Get up with me.
14:39Get up with me.
14:40Get up with me.
14:41Get up with me.
14:41You want me more than I want you.
14:43Did the perfect argument get that?
14:45I'm gonna go shower.
14:46I've always liked to play with fire.
14:49Alone.
14:49No, no pinkings.
14:54I'm a loser, huh?
14:57We'll see about that.
15:02Hey, so, my dad's birthday party is next week.
15:07No, we're hosting a dinner.
15:09You want your husband to attend? That's sweet.
15:12Actually, it's just...
15:14It's gonna be this whole gross wealth measuring contest.
15:17And Bianca and the others are gonna target you, I just know it.
15:19They're gonna make fun of your clothes and gifts and everything.
15:25So I would embarrass you.
15:26No, no, it's just...
15:30I don't wanna make you go through that.
15:34These people only see dollar signs.
15:38She's trying to protect me.
15:40It's funny, I don't remember seeing sending Nora into the lion's den in our marriage contract.
15:45Why are you being so nice to me?
15:47You don't even know me.
15:49Because you're better than all of them.
15:51I...
15:52You deserve to be treated like a queen.
15:55No one has ever stood in my corner like this.
15:58Whatever you'd say.
16:02Don't waste whatever little money you have on expensive gifts.
16:06They won't appreciate it.
16:08You're a legendary animal.
16:12You're a legendary animal.
16:13Digital trust, just now you're gonna know...
16:15Prepare the best gift you could find.
16:17One the Hawthorne family can't refuse.
16:19And something Gavin Winters couldn't get his hands on in a million years.
16:25This was a mistake. We shouldn't have come.
16:27It's okay, babe. We got this.
16:32This night is cold in the kingdom.
16:35I can feel you fade away.
16:38From the kitchen to the bathroom sinkin'
16:42You ready?
16:45You actually brought your janitor husband to dad's birthday party?
16:50I knew you were shameless, Nora.
16:52But God, this is a new low for you.
16:53So...
16:54I'm shameless?
16:56At least my husband's face was plastered across the stadium screen for the whole world to see.
17:01After just one week of marriage.
17:03I don't know what you're talking about!
17:05Are you fucking shitting on me? On screen?
17:10Yaga!
17:13Goodbye.
17:21You brought the janitor?
17:24Well, Daddy, since he's already here, I thought he could make himself useful and give the toilets a good scrubbing.
17:30Maybe shine Gavin's shoes while he's at us?
17:33Hey, walk it off.
17:38Don't listen to them.
17:41It's okay.
17:44Mr. Hawthorne, I heard how much of a wine connoisseur you are.
17:48So, I decided to bring a few pieces from my wine collection just for you.
17:57Man.
17:58Excellent.
17:59Bianca sure did pick the right man to marry.
18:03Alright. Enough standing around. Let's all go inside. Come on, sweetheart.
18:09Let's just go.
18:10I am not putting up with this.
18:13Hey, come on. I didn't bring this kid for nothing. Let's just see how it goes.
18:17I don't want this. Look at this.
18:20And I can't stop myself from falling.
18:26And I can't stop myself from falling.
18:28Are you crazy? Pouring cold water onto him in the dead of winter!
18:32Just for disinfection purposes. With all the germs janitors pick up? You have no idea how many diseases he's carrying.
18:40Open a window, would you? Just gave this guy a bath and he still smells like shit.
18:45If you wanna go, then I'll be so mad.
18:47Elvis may be a janitor, but he's the cleanest one here.
18:51Let me down slowly, let me down slowly.
18:53Gavin's been passed around like a blunt. Who knows how many SUVs he has.
18:57But if anyone needs disinfecting, it's him.
18:59If you wanna go, then I'll be so lonely.
19:00Elvis is my husband.
19:03If you leave him, baby, let me down slowly.
19:05You little bit!
19:07Mom! Do something!
19:09How dare you!
19:11Gavin's the COO of Invitica.
19:13He keeps that whole company running and makes millions doing it.
19:17That's the kind of person that deserves respect.
19:23You are unbelievable, Nora.
19:26It's your father's birthday and you show up here empty-handed?
19:30With some guy that looks like he just crawled out of a dumpster.
19:33You should have stayed home.
19:36Yeah, how's your dumpster diver gonna scrounge up the cash for a gift for Dad?
19:41My Gavin brought bottles of wine worth hundreds of thousands.
19:45And those are just the cheap ones.
19:50A 1945 Romani Conti.
19:53A 1961 Chateau Chauvin Blanc.
19:56And a 1990 Henri Jaillet.
19:58Richefort Grand Cru.
20:01Impressive.
20:02These must be your most prized collections.
20:04Well, well, well.
20:06Looks like our resident janitor knows about more than just scrubbing toilets.
20:11You are right though.
20:12Those are top-of-the-line bottles.
20:18Especially this one, Mr. Hoffman.
20:21They don't call Henry J or the billionaire's wine for nothing.
20:26Why don't we go and open this bad boy hub show?
20:30Splendid.
20:33You're what every son-in-law should be, Gavin.
20:37Put the bottle I brought.
20:39What's yours to shame?
20:41Huh.
20:42You've got a lot of nerve.
20:44Thinking you can outdo Gavin?
20:46Let's see what kind of garbage you pull out of the trash heap.
20:54What's this?
20:57Homemade moonshine?
20:59There's no label.
21:00Who knows if it's even safe?
21:02Hell, it could be full of deadly toxins.
21:04Legit looks like you snatched it off some hobo.
21:07What are you trying to do?
21:08Poison our dad?
21:09No.
21:10No, please.
21:10Shut up.
21:11This is the most appalling gift I've ever received in my life.
21:16Now, take your street rat boyfriend and leave.
21:22Did it not occur to you that my bottle is unlabeled because it's highly exclusive?
21:39Luckily, I have this AI powered scanner.
21:43It's one of Invitica's newest inventions.
21:45Scan any product and it tells you its exact value.
21:48Doesn't even need a barcode.
21:50This will prove that this janitor is bluffing.
21:54Nora!
21:54How about this?
21:56If your wine's cheaper than ours, you and your janitor boy toy have to scrub all six bathrooms in the
22:02house.
22:03Yeah.
22:04Why are you so obsessed with price?
22:07It's the thought that counts.
22:14Seriously, who gives a fuck about thought?
22:17What?
22:17What?
22:18Afraid you're going to lose?
22:20We'll take your bet.
22:22But if our wine is the more expensive one, what do we get in return?
22:27If your bottle is more expensive than mine, then I, Gavin Winters, will apologize to you from the bottom of
22:36my heart.
22:37Ugh, boring. New rules.
22:40If we lose, I'll admit to everyone in the room that Nora's trash husband is better than mine.
22:45And I'll show him the utmost respect every time I see him.
22:48But if you lose, you have to get down and lick the wine off my shoes.
23:03Market price, 200 grand.
23:17Market price, 500 grand.
23:20Half a million? Oh my goodness!
23:24Oh yes.
23:33Market price, one million.
23:39200,000? 500,000? A million?
23:42What are those bottles made of? Gold?
23:44Richard, you just don't get it.
23:47But fine wine is the age and the terroir that separate the gems from the phonies.
23:55It's incredible. You could buy a whole house with this kind of money.
23:58Bianca's new husband is quite impressive.
24:02Just a token of my appreciation, Mr. Hawthorne.
24:07These bottles are reserved for Invitica's most distinguished VIP clients.
24:12Splendid.
24:13They're expensive.
24:14But what really matters is status and exclusivity.
24:18Couldn't agree more.
24:20And if anyone embodies status and exclusivity, it's us Hawthorns.
24:28And as for you, you bastard.
24:32I demand an apology!
24:36Great Daddy!
24:38Let's have a little fun first.
24:40You really did snatch this off some bum, didn't you?
24:44Insult Elvis again, and you'll regret it.
24:51Shut it!
24:52Biggest mistake of my life was having a worthless daughter like you.
24:59Now, get out of my sight.
25:02Just go else.
25:04They don't deserve your gift.
25:06Wait a second, sore losers.
25:08We had a bet.
25:09You're not walking out of here until you lick the wine off my shoes.
25:15And while you're at it, why don't you strip that dress down and clean my shoes as well?
25:24Fine.
25:25I'll do it, but you have to stop insulting Elvis.
25:37Wait, Nora.
25:38Nora, we don't even know who the winner is yet.
25:41Elvis, you don't have to. It's fine.
25:48Price calculating.
25:51One million?
25:52Price calculating.
25:53How is it still going up?
25:57Impossible!
25:58That's impossible!
26:01What happens next?
26:03Download Real Short.
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