- 14 hours ago
Celebrity Sabotage - Season 1 - Episode 05
Category
📺
TVTranscript
00:04Welcome to the Manor House, the ultimate setting for a reality game show like no other.
00:12This sprawling estate is the home of six brand new TV shows.
00:17Welcome to Couple Goals.
00:19This is SOS, Survive or Surrender.
00:23Welcome to the Backstabler.
00:24Each with its own set of real contestants.
00:27Oh my word.
00:28Do you all understand?
00:29Yes, sir.
00:30He's ready to play a little game.
00:32But what none of them know is that all of these shows are totally fake.
00:38Oh my God, are you joking me?
00:42That's because hidden in the basement is Mission HQ, home to an elite team of celebrity saboteurs.
00:52What the book here?
00:54Woo!
00:54Yes!
00:56Oh, God!
01:00Each week they are joined by a brand new celebrity guest saboteur and a different fake show host.
01:09Together, their mission is to sabotage the fake show and build up a secret prize fund for the contestants to
01:15share worth up to £30,000.
01:18And there's only one rule.
01:21Don't get caught!
01:24Don't get caught!
01:24Celebrity captured.
01:25Don't get caught!
01:48Madness!
01:49Oh, no!
01:50Mind game.
01:51I'm in charge.
01:52I'm the governor here.
01:53And mayhem.
01:54I'm ready.
01:55Get back!
01:56Woohoo!
01:57Where's he coming?
01:57There's a man in the bush.
01:59There's a man in the bush.
01:59Oh my God!
02:00This is celebrity sabotage.
02:07It's a new day at the manor house, which signals the return of our celebrity mischief makers.
02:13We're back!
02:14Yes!
02:14We're back!
02:15Oh, it feels great!
02:17Oh, man!
02:18What a day!
02:19Yes!
02:20Every time I come back, I feel like I'm home.
02:22I miss you every time we go away.
02:23Let me just talk for a second.
02:25Let me take the stage.
02:26Come on.
02:26I feel very confident.
02:28We've been here 104 weeks.
02:29Yeah.
02:29And I feel like I've finally got it on lock.
02:31Yeah?
02:32Yeah.
02:32Nothing can stop us today.
02:34No, it can't.
02:34Who do we think we're going to have this time, man?
02:36We need someone with guts.
02:37Yeah, yeah, yeah.
02:38Maybe someone physical.
02:40They're just like, ugh!
02:47How are you doing?
02:52How are you doing?
02:54How are you doing?
02:55I'm so happy.
02:57This is great.
02:58What an honour.
02:58What an honour, mate.
02:59This looks like we're playing for a Saturday's match.
03:03What's going on?
03:04I ain't got a clue.
03:05What's happening?
03:05Harry, I'll be honest.
03:06We feel unbeatable, don't we?
03:08We feel completely unbeatable.
03:09And now with you, adding into the mix.
03:11It's just added to the mix.
03:12It could all go wrong.
03:13It could all go wrong.
03:14Nice.
03:14Nice words.
03:15You're the gapper.
03:16I'm used to going into the teams that are losing and trying to...
03:19Turn it around.
03:20You know, yeah.
03:20I feel under pressure.
03:23Oh!
03:23No!
03:25Come on over.
03:26Oh, my lord.
03:26Celebrities.
03:27Five contestants are on their way.
03:30However, they're not alone.
03:32They'll each be joined by a canine companion.
03:35Oh!
03:37It's a dog show!
03:38What?
03:39The contestants think they're here to take part in a brand new dog competition show called
03:44The Perfect Pooch.
03:46Oh!
03:47The Perfect Pooch!
03:49And that's not all.
03:50Celebrities, please welcome Rue, your sixth saboteur.
03:54No, stop.
04:01Oh!
04:02Hey!
04:04Hey!
04:05Hey!
04:06Guys, we're now looking after Sam Thompson, a dog and an elderly person, all in one episode.
04:11This is...
04:12It's like, what's going on?
04:14Rue!
04:17Oh, look at the contestant!
04:20Wow!
04:20I'm Remy.
04:21I'm 28.
04:22I'm from Surrey.
04:23And I live with my dog, Frankie.
04:25Oh, look at Frankie's face.
04:27Frankie looks a bit, hey!
04:28And so does Remy.
04:29Look at her outfit.
04:30Yeah, yeah, yeah.
04:30Frankie might not look fierce, but she is a fierce competitor and we will knock the
04:35other dogs out of the competition.
04:37I'm Elaine.
04:38I'm 62 years old.
04:39And this is my dog, Misha, who is a great day.
04:42If I had a dog, it would be a mediocre day.
04:45Mediocre day!
04:46I love her so much.
04:47She's...
04:48She's...
04:48Yeah.
04:49Sorry.
04:50Got to be careful what I say on TV, haven't I?
04:52I can't say that I love her more than the grandkids, can I?
04:57I'm James.
04:57I'm 45.
04:58This is Lowkey the Pomsky.
05:00He's four and a half years old.
05:01We're both really competitive.
05:03So, yeah.
05:03I bet I spoke to bring home the win on this one.
05:05Lowkey is so lowkey I forgot about it.
05:08This is so lowkey.
05:09He's very cute.
05:10My name's Megan.
05:11I'm 32.
05:12And this is Olive.
05:13She's an 18-month-old Cocker Spaniel.
05:15I would love to say that we're gonna win because I'm so competitive.
05:19But it is down to Olive.
05:21Megan's got the same hairstyle as Olive.
05:23Can we just say that Olive is looking up at her mum like to say...
05:26You what?
05:27I'm Amber.
05:28I'm 24 years old.
05:29I'm from Scotland.
05:30This is Farrah.
05:31She's a two-year-old Australian Shepherd.
05:33Oh, no, that makes me feel quite bad.
05:34She's come all the way from Scotland to do a fake show.
05:36To win money.
05:37To win money.
05:38To win money.
05:38See, that's why I love you, GK.
05:41And hosting the perfect pooch...
05:43Who's coming out the door?
05:45...is the perfect fake dog show presenter.
05:48It's Claire Balding!
05:50No way!
05:51It's Claire Balding!
05:51I'm having a crisis.
05:52I love Claire.
05:53Hello!
05:54Hello!
05:55Hi!
05:56So nice to have you here.
05:58Welcome to my cottage.
05:59Claire Balding is great.
06:02Brilliant.
06:02Welcome to the perfect pooch.
06:05It is lovely to see all of you here.
06:08They always say that dogs match their owners.
06:10Frankie and Remy do look quite similar.
06:11Actually, Frankie looks like Elaine.
06:15Do you know what I mean?
06:16Like the same face.
06:18And over the next two days, I'm going to be setting you a series of challenges
06:22to see who will emerge as best in show.
06:27Claire!
06:28Are you ready to do some sabotaging, Claire?
06:31Yeah!
06:33Right, we're going to get your tails wagging,
06:35because it's nearly time for your first challenge.
06:38And this is called Pause and Pose.
06:42You are going to get the chance of strutting your stuff on the catwalk,
06:46or as we like to call it, the dog walk.
06:48And I am not going to leave you on your own to prepare for this.
06:51To guide you, to advise you, to inspire you,
06:55we have a podcaster, an influencer, a dog mother herself.
07:00Wait, wait.
07:01The one and only GK Barry.
07:05Oh.
07:06My.
07:07God.
07:08So, if you're ready, I'm going to wish you good luck
07:10and I shall see you on the dog walk.
07:14HQ alert.
07:16Oh!
07:18HQ alert, really?
07:19GK.
07:21You must become the perfect pooch's fashion expert.
07:24I love this.
07:25Dressing him up.
07:26I dress my dog up all the time.
07:27I do.
07:28I do.
07:29Joe.
07:30You must disguise yourself as a big pile of dog toys.
07:36Not the first time, weirdly.
07:37Come on.
07:38Then head to the groom room and await further instruction.
07:41Okay.
07:42And remember, there's only one rule.
07:44Don't get torn.
07:46If you do, there will be consequences.
07:55Wait.
07:56There they go.
07:58Joel.
07:59Joel, you look amazing.
08:01GK, get to the pink room, guys.
08:03Quick.
08:04This is not going to go well.
08:07Oh!
08:09Wow.
08:10Feels like I'm in GK's bedroom.
08:12Yes, yeah, yeah.
08:13Get into the dog bed.
08:15In the dog bed.
08:16Oh, perfect.
08:18Get down a little bit.
08:19It's actually really comfy.
08:22Very good, isn't it?
08:26GK, Joel.
08:27We have Misha coming in.
08:30Hello.
08:31Oh, my.
08:32Hello.
08:33It's a horse.
08:35Elaine, how are you?
08:37I'm fine.
08:38We're matching.
08:39Totally still, Joel.
08:40Totally still.
08:41Hello.
08:41Hello.
08:42Hello.
08:43Okay, and this is Misha.
08:44Yes.
08:45Okay.
08:46What vibe are we going for today?
08:48I'm going for, like, a dancing diva.
08:52Joel, you cannot move.
08:53That dog knows there's something going on in there.
08:55So, we're going for diva, dancing.
08:58This goes out there.
08:58Okay.
08:59Misha knows something's up.
09:01Joel, she can smell something.
09:03Do you think Misha would like the wig?
09:05Joel!
09:06Joel!
09:07Yeah.
09:07Yeah.
09:08Joel, Joel.
09:08She's in a wig.
09:09Misha's sleeping you.
09:11Joel!
09:13You coming?
09:13Okay.
09:14So, I think maybe we should get her on.
09:15No, you're fine.
09:16You're fine.
09:16You're fine.
09:17Oh, yeah.
09:18Yeah.
09:19GK, you're doing a fantastic job.
09:21Oh.
09:23Misha.
09:24Wow.
09:26That's a midlife crisis if I've seen one.
09:28I feel like now she's Misha.
09:31Wow.
09:31Good girlie.
09:33Joel is literally right there next to Misha.
09:35As long as you feel good.
09:36Woo!
09:38Celebrities.
09:39It's time for your first mission.
09:41GK.
09:42You must convince Elaine to spray her hair red so it matches Misha's dog wig.
09:47Oh, no!
09:49This mission is worth £3,000.
09:52A lot of money to start with.
09:53Right, Elaine.
09:55I want us to go all out.
09:56Yeah.
09:58Now you're going to have to take my word for this.
10:01Okay?
10:03I'm going to do your hair red.
10:05It will wash out.
10:06Oh, God.
10:07Ah!
10:09Would you let me do that?
10:10Yeah.
10:11Yes.
10:12And you and Misha can be like the red twins.
10:15Okay, yeah.
10:15Yeah.
10:16Okay.
10:17Well done, GK.
10:18You've absolutely nailed that.
10:20Okay, I'm going to do it.
10:21I'm going to do it.
10:22Fair play, Elaine.
10:23Any allergies?
10:24No.
10:25It's too late now anyway.
10:27Okay.
10:29Wow, wow, wow.
10:31Do you have a partner?
10:33I do, yeah.
10:34And he's bald.
10:34He's turned into a salon.
10:35He's bald.
10:36Yeah.
10:36You're going to put him to shame with this red barnet, Elaine.
10:39I'll tell you that.
10:40You know what?
10:40I can't believe Elaine is just letting her spray her hair red.
10:44Even Misha can't believe it.
10:46Look at...
10:47Look at...
10:47Look at...
10:49Misha!
10:52Misha's like, what the hell?
10:54Oh, guys, this is...
10:57Look at that.
10:58Look how red it is.
11:00Oh, my God.
11:02Do you know what, Elaine?
11:03I think this really works.
11:05Yes!
11:08Fair play.
11:09I'm so proud of Elaine.
11:10Okay.
11:11Outfit.
11:12Tutu.
11:13She's so sweet.
11:14She's just so game.
11:15Mission alert.
11:17Oh, got another one.
11:19Jill, you must secretly steal Misha the dog's wig.
11:23So they fail to present matching looks on the dog walk.
11:27How is she going to do that?
11:29Oh, my God.
11:31This mission is worth...
11:323,000 pounds.
11:34Oh, my God.
11:35This is impossible.
11:36I don't know how he's going to do this.
11:38She's right there.
11:39Elaine's right.
11:40GK's got to take Elaine away.
11:42Right, GK, send her to go and get changed.
11:44I'll stay here with Misha if you want to quickly go get changed.
11:47Okay, yeah.
11:47I can make some small talk.
11:48Got some keys?
11:49Yes, please.
11:51Joel, while she's getting changed, you've got to go and get that wig.
11:54Joel, I don't think Misha's going to come to you.
11:57You've got to go for it.
11:58You've got to get across the room.
12:02Go on, you've got to go.
12:04How are you getting on, Elaine?
12:05Sorry, I know the outfit's a little bit difficult.
12:08I'm getting there.
12:08I'm getting there.
12:09It's all good.
12:09No rush, just tell me when you're nearly ready and I'll give you a countdown.
12:13Joel, you've got to go for it.
12:14You've got to get across the room.
12:15Get up and run.
12:17Get the wig.
12:18I am coming.
12:19I am coming.
12:20I am coming.
12:24Joel's just pooed his pants.
12:30Go on, Joel.
12:31I've always believed in you.
12:33Go on, Joel.
12:36Go on, Joel.
12:38Okay, I'm ready.
12:39Get back in, get back in.
12:40Joel, get back.
12:42Oh, my God.
12:43It's ready.
12:43Go back.
12:56Go on, Joel.
12:57I've always believed in you.
12:59Go on, Joel.
13:02Go on, Joel.
13:04Okay, I'm ready.
13:05Get back in, get back in.
13:06Joel, get back.
13:08Oh, my God.
13:08It's ready.
13:09No.
13:10Oh, Elaine!
13:13Oh, my God.
13:13Oh, my God.
13:15Oh, my God, Elaine.
13:16Oh, my God, I'm obsessed.
13:18I love it.
13:20Joel, do not move.
13:23Tutu is fab.
13:24How did she not do it?
13:25She just walked straight past Joel.
13:28Amazing.
13:29Right.
13:30I think your dog walk ready.
13:32Right.
13:32You ready?
13:33Yeah.
13:34Go on, Misha.
13:35Misha so excited to get away from me.
13:37Thank you so much, Elaine.
13:39That was crazy.
13:41Wow.
13:41Never seen anything like it in my life.
13:43What was that?
13:44Yeah, you probably.
13:47Joel, I'm not being funny.
13:49There was no way we were passing that one.
13:51Well, he couldn't get to Misha.
13:52He couldn't.
13:53She wasn't having it.
13:57This is payback time for all the times when I've jested her off.
14:03Look at her.
14:04She's beautiful.
14:05She looks stunning.
14:06Great.
14:07Do you feel confident in it?
14:08Yeah, I think so.
14:09You should.
14:10I think it's amazing.
14:12This outfit here.
14:13The both of them.
14:15Yeah.
14:15This works.
14:16Oh, yeah.
14:17Give us a royal wave.
14:20Wow.
14:21I love it.
14:23I love it.
14:24I love it.
14:25I love it.
14:25It's a look, right?
14:25I love it.
14:27I like that you're colour coordinated.
14:30Harry, get her on a horse.
14:32Can you pretend you're riding a horse, please?
14:34There we go.
14:35Enjoyed that.
14:36With all the furry fashionistas through the groom room,
14:39the pooches and parents are ready to strut the dog walk.
14:44Okay.
14:45I feel very confident.
14:47I dressed them today.
14:48And they were all happy with that?
14:49Well, I don't know about happy.
14:50I spray painted a woman's hair red.
14:52Did you?
14:52I am...
14:53Mission alert.
14:56Oh!
14:57Mission alert!
14:58Celebrities.
14:59The contestants are about to take to the dog walk.
15:02So it's time for your next missions.
15:05Sam.
15:06You must become the photographer.
15:08And may the contestants strike doggy poses on the dog walk.
15:12That's good.
15:14Each successful dog pose is worth £300.
15:17And there is a maximum of £3,000 up for grabs.
15:21Oh, yes!
15:22Harry.
15:23You must pose as the lighting director of the show
15:25and await further instructions.
15:28Oh!
15:28Harry, we're going into the field together!
15:30I'm scared we even put a plug in the wall in case it goes off.
15:33Ha, ha, ha!
15:35I'm just going to go pizza.
15:36Wow.
15:40Oh, my God.
15:41I must say, I like the hair and I like the shirt.
15:45The moustache is tickling me nose.
15:47You look like you're both on the run from the law.
15:50Feeling out!
15:52You haven't even noticed the ponytail!
15:54How did they do that?
15:55Oh, no!
15:56Oh, my God!
15:57Ha, ha, ha!
16:00Oh, GK, you forgot about us, have you?
16:03Hi, Judy.
16:03How are you?
16:04Hi, Claire.
16:05Hello, Judy.
16:06This is trouble.
16:07When you guys see Harry and Sam, you are going to lose your minds.
16:12Oh, my days.
16:13Do you think we'll recognise Harry and Sam?
16:15Almost certainly.
16:20Oh, my God, Claire.
16:23Oh, that is good.
16:24GK, are you okay?
16:25Hello, Al.
16:25You look the same.
16:27No, I don't.
16:27I've got a nose!
16:29Hi!
16:30How are you, Claire?
16:31Hi!
16:32Harry!
16:33Harry, you look absolutely fantastic.
16:35Right now, I'll be honest, you look like you're trying to contact your wife on a Ouija board.
16:38It's extremely fantastic.
16:44Are we? Are we?
16:48Brand new crew members Phil and Al are in position, but can they convince the contestants to strike doggy poses
16:55without getting caught?
16:58So, first up, we've got Elaine and Misha.
17:02Oh, my word.
17:04Yes.
17:06Oh, my God.
17:07Got this.
17:08That Misha's wearing that red ring.
17:09Wow.
17:13That's it, girl.
17:14The pink works.
17:18Oh, well done.
17:20Sensational.
17:20That was terrific.
17:21Yes!
17:22So good.
17:23So all you've got to do now is your photo poses.
17:25Yes.
17:26That is where our lovely photographer Phil comes in.
17:28Oh, my God, I loved it.
17:30Just the bit of that was absolutely delightful.
17:32Oh, my God, here he goes.
17:34Here he goes.
17:35He's going to try and get you to bring that energy again.
17:37Oh, Elaine, dance with me, baby.
17:39Yeah.
17:39Dance with me.
17:40He's so Austin Powers.
17:42So what we're thinking, if we're okay, is we're going to go like doggy styles, really.
17:49Al, do you mind just getting the light down?
17:51Thank you, mate.
17:52So if you wouldn't mind, just all fours, please, Elaine.
17:56Perfect.
17:57Look at you.
17:58Yes, Sam, that's one.
17:59That's great.
18:00Do you know what?
18:01Just cock a quick leg.
18:02Ha-ha!
18:03Cock a quick leg.
18:04There we go.
18:05Yes, Sam!
18:07We got that.
18:08Elaine, thank you so much.
18:09That is absolutely beautiful.
18:11Thank you so much.
18:12It was fun.
18:13Not sure about the photographer.
18:14Gravy, baby.
18:16It was a bit weird.
18:19Next up, we have got James and Loki.
18:23Ooh!
18:24Ooh!
18:26Ooh!
18:30Oh, my God, he's amazing!
18:32Oh, my God, he's so good!
18:38Ooh!
18:39Ooh!
18:41I'm good at myself!
18:43Amazing.
18:44So good.
18:46Watch out, Britain's Got Talent, genuinely.
18:48I want you to get on all fours like your dog, if that's all right.
18:52Well done.
18:53Roll over, roll over.
18:55Roll over.
18:55Do a little roll.
18:56Do a little roll.
18:57Oh, yes, please.
18:58The tongue out, tongue out, tongue out.
19:01Yes!
19:05Beautiful!
19:07Beautiful!
19:07The still photos were great.
19:09It's a proper immersive wolf experience.
19:11Next up, then, we've got Remy and Frankie.
19:15Yes, Queen.
19:16Oh, look at this!
19:17Derby's sequence.
19:19Sass.
19:20Do a little sad puppy dog eye there.
19:22One paw.
19:23Give us one paw.
19:25Give us one paw.
19:26Yes, that's good.
19:27That's good, that's good, that's good.
19:30Next up, Amber and Farrah.
19:33Pops-a-trot.
19:35Oh, look at this.
19:36Giddy up.
19:37It's unbelievable.
19:39A little roll, please, if that's okay.
19:41Oh, well done.
19:41Oh, look at that.
19:43That is absolutely great.
19:45Harry, just say, do you want some more red, Phil?
19:46More red.
19:47Actually, pull it down a little bit, if that's all right, Al.
19:51Pull your hands up like that.
19:52Yeah!
19:53Then one of these, one of these, one of these, one of these, look at the polls.
19:55There we go.
19:57Absolutely beautiful.
19:58Harry, say, do you want more red, Phil?
19:59More red, Phil.
20:00Phil, more red.
20:01No, no more goddamn red, Al.
20:02We've had enough red.
20:03Wrap me up, send me to the moon, because we are finished.
20:06Thank you so much.
20:09I don't know how we just did that without laughing.
20:12Well done, everyone.
20:13That was unbelievable.
20:16Harry, what do you think of all of this, man?
20:17Phil's a long way from managing Tottenham.
20:21LAUGHTER
20:24And finally, we have got Meghan and Olive.
20:28But I don't feel like...
20:28Yeah!
20:29What a song, baby!
20:31What a song!
20:32This is Dancing With Bells On.
20:34Yeah.
20:38Very nice.
20:40Well done, well done.
20:43Fantastic.
20:44Really good, well done.
20:45Right, Phil is going to take over and do some action shots.
20:48Mission alert.
20:51Celebrities, you must sabotage the photoshoot so it can't continue.
20:56What?
20:57Yeah.
20:57This mission is worth £3,000.
21:00How the hell are we going to do this?
21:04Harry, you're going to have to kill the lights.
21:07Yeah, no problem.
21:09Babe, honestly, unbelievable.
21:12Unbelievable.
21:13Let's do this.
21:14Babe, give me some horse dancing.
21:18What's going on?
21:20Al?
21:21What's going on?
21:22Harry, try something else.
21:23What's going on over there?
21:25Harry, try another lever.
21:27There we go, babe.
21:28Oh, no!
21:29What's going on there?
21:30Phil, you all right?
21:32Yeah!
21:34Yes!
21:35Oh, gosh, are you okay?
21:36Phil, stand forward over and mash the camera.
21:40Al, have you...
21:40Is it...
21:41Oh, no!
21:42Oh, no!
21:43Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha!
21:46Are you okay?
21:47Phil, are you all right?
21:48Are you all right?
21:48I've dropped the camera.
21:49Are you okay?
21:50What's going on?
21:51I've dropped the camera.
21:53Phil, you all right?
21:54Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha!
21:56You're done there, what have you done there?
21:57Phil, you just be a bit careful, because we had somebody fall off this stack.
22:02We get lights!
22:03Somebody!
22:05Oh, are you...
22:06Oh, are you okay?
22:07Big Al, what have you done there?
22:09Phil, do you want more red?
22:10We don't want any more colours, Big Al.
22:14I can't take your photos.
22:16I feel absolutely terrible. I'm shaking like a pooing dog.
22:18Good dog, actually.
22:20Good girl.
22:20Good girl.
22:21We're so sorry.
22:23Sorry, Olive. Sorry.
22:24Thank you, Olive.
22:25Didn't you get enough glue on the grill?
22:27We don't want any more blue, Big Al.
22:30The dog walk was probably the most chaotic bit of Morris dancing I've ever done in my entire life.
22:35And then everything went black and I had no idea what happened after that.
22:41I mean, you guys were fantastic.
22:44We're a very good team.
22:45We're doing okay, but I think there's more left in the shit.
22:48We can bank more money for the guys.
22:49Yes, gaffer.
22:51Right, let's be having you.
22:55Celebrities, your first day of sabotaging the perfect pooch is over.
22:59Yes, come on.
23:01And you've added £9,000 to the prize pot.
23:08Get some rest, because tomorrow...
23:10There is more doggy sabotaging to come.
23:13Hands in, hands in.
23:14Here we go.
23:15One, two, three.
23:17Sabotage!
23:26Here we go.
23:28All right, guys, halftime.
23:30Great day yesterday.
23:31Performed well, everybody.
23:32All done your part.
23:34But we need more today.
23:36Today's the big day where we can really get some money for these guys.
23:39Let's get it done.
23:40Come on!
23:41Love that!
23:51Good morning, Claire Balding.
23:53Hello, good morning, Joel Donis.
23:55The contestants are coming in.
23:57Exciting.
23:57It's going to be a big old day of sabotaging.
24:00Oh, my word.
24:01We're going to need you more than ever, Claire Balding.
24:04I will be encouraging them to keep going, whatever happens.
24:07They trust you.
24:09That's the problem.
24:10Like the nation.
24:14Roo is watching the TV.
24:16Yeah.
24:16Yeah.
24:17He sabotaged them.
24:18He sabotaged them.
24:19He got his eye on the prize.
24:21Hello, pooches.
24:22Hello, parents.
24:22And welcome to day two of The Perfect Pooch.
24:25You're a Claire.
24:26Today, a very different challenge.
24:29This is all about speed, precision and concentration as you take on this very different agility course.
24:37For the second challenge, whichever pooch manages to scamper, snake and spring through the course in the quickest time, wins.
24:45There's going to be an independent umpire of each section of the course.
24:48There will be penalties for any failed stations.
24:54Mission alert.
24:56Oh!
24:59Joel, you must disguise yourself in a bush by the sit and stay station and distract Misha and Frankie so
25:06they both fail to stay on the spot.
25:08Oh, me and Misha facing off against each other again.
25:11You wanted this, Joel.
25:12You wanted this, mate.
25:13Me and Misha have some unfinished business.
25:15Yeah, yeah.
25:16Each attempt is worth £3,000, so there are £6,000 up for grabs.
25:22Oh, my God.
25:23That's so much money.
25:24Shall I push up?
25:26Yeah, push up, Joel.
25:27Come on!
25:30Oh!
25:32Look at that!
25:34Wow!
25:35Oh, my God.
25:36Like a green ninja.
25:37I'm sliding all over the top.
25:39But you've got, like, an action belt.
25:41You've got, at the back of you, you've got one of those launchers.
25:43You could do with sticking one down the front of your pants, actually.
25:46Yeah.
25:47This is amazing.
25:47I've got one foot.
25:48Open the door.
25:49You are so nice.
25:50Open the door.
25:50Here we go.
25:51No one will know.
25:53No one's going to know.
25:54Oh, God.
25:55They're going to know.
25:58Go.
25:58Go.
25:59Go.
25:59We need you to line the grass so we can see what you look like.
26:06Oh!
26:11They're coming.
26:12Joel, they're coming.
26:15I'm in.
26:16I'm in the bush.
26:17Oh, God, none of that.
26:21Joel?
26:22Yes?
26:23Elaine and Misha are on the course right now.
26:28Joel?
26:29Yes?
26:29I don't think you've got any chance of doing this.
26:33Good luck.
26:35Please welcome to the course Elaine and her great Dane, Misha.
26:40Elaine's ready.
26:43They're up.
26:45Now, Misha has to stay.
26:47Sit.
26:49Sit.
26:50Wait.
26:51Wait there.
26:53Stay.
26:55Stay.
26:56And what Elaine doesn't know, but Misha might notice,
26:59is that Joel Dornet is right there in the bush.
27:03Get the sausage.
27:04Now.
27:06Misha.
27:07Misha, come in.
27:08Come.
27:09Misha, come in.
27:10Go on, Joel.
27:11What's this?
27:12What's this?
27:13Misha, come in.
27:13God, God.
27:14Come.
27:15Come.
27:15Misha, come in.
27:16Get the sausage out.
27:17Get your sausage out and throw it.
27:34What's this?
27:35What's this?
27:36Misha, I said, oh, God.
27:39Get the sausage out.
27:41Misha.
27:41Misha, get your sausage out and throw it.
27:48Oh, man.
27:48Misha, come.
27:49Come on, baby.
27:50Misha sideways, but comes straight through to Elaine.
27:52Oh, man.
27:54I think he lost his bottle a bit.
27:55And they are off and away on the agility course.
27:58Oh.
28:11Misha.
28:11through you can see the whole tunnel good going oh that is terrific oh and the clock stops well
28:19done this is going to be harder than i thought joel you're doing okay look you failed yesterday
28:27and again today we have got subs on standby which you may have to be substituted but don't worry
28:34please don't substitute me harry please don't i know they've got jordan north on the phone
28:42beaten by his nemesis misha joel's last chance lies with remy and frankie but will he bank the
28:48three grand or end up in the doghouse here we go sit down good frankie's gonna have to sit and
29:00wait
29:00it's the time yeah okay this is good sweet missus can we start again sorry there's something in there
29:18that's got her is there a camera in there or something a little bit trouble down there what
29:25could that be something in here that's there's a man in the bush oh my god it's nothing Joel
29:43done it is that you oh what is going on code red code red Joe you have been caught just
30:00follow me
30:00and I promise you I promise you it's all gonna make sense Frankie come with me as well yeah
30:19Joe as you have been captured please break the emergency glass
30:24oh Remy you are not on the perfect pooch what you are actually a contestant on a secret game show
30:35called celebrity sabotage you now have a big decision to make stop it on the table there's
30:45a briefcase containing two thousand pounds that's a lot of chicken Frankie you can choose to take this
30:52money right now or you can stay and help us keep any further sabotage missions under wraps and at the
31:00end
31:00of the show you'll take your equal share of the prize pot of up to 30 thousand pounds Frankie what
31:09shall we
31:10do
31:22we're gonna stay
31:23it was crazy I am completely gobsmacked I can't believe that we're not actually part of the perfect
31:32page me and Frankie will keep all of the celeb secrets Joel as you were caught in the act of
31:45sabotage you will be punished please proceed to the lock-up where you must stay until further notice oh my
31:53god
31:55oh my god
31:58oh my god
32:00say bye to your daddy
32:02see you later dad
32:03oh
32:03oh my god
32:10he's already bored we haven't even started these boards the weakest link has been put in jail
32:15oh god
32:16and um
32:17Harry's been gunning Joel all day
32:19and then now we can move on forever
32:21yeah yeah
32:23oh
32:24mission alert
32:24oh
32:26oh
32:26no
32:30Sam
32:31no
32:32oh
32:32you must hide inside the tunnel
32:34and ensure Olive and Farrah don't get through
32:39oh
32:39I'm gonna block the tunnel
32:42each successful obstruction is worth two thousand pounds so there is four thousand pounds up for grabs
32:48oh
32:49oh
32:49it's so much money
32:51Sam
32:52please don't fail because I really don't think I can handle you being in this prison with me
32:58I think we're good
33:01Claire Claire
33:02oh here he comes the puppy dog himself
33:04if you need help blink twice Claire
33:07hi
33:08hi
33:08hi hi hi
33:09right next contestants
33:10yeah
33:10are on their way
33:11oh my god
33:12so go hide
33:12oh we're doing it
33:14this is a disaster waiting to happen
33:17keep going a bit more
33:18that's the best way
33:19yeah there
33:20stop there
33:22please welcome
33:23please welcome
33:24Megan and her cocker spaniel Olive
33:27okay
33:29oh flying up to join her
33:33Olive is quick to cross the course
33:35she's coming
33:36she's coming
33:38Olive
33:38good girl
33:39can Sam get her to stop
33:41through
33:43through
33:44through
33:44through
33:47oh my god
33:49let her go
33:50ah
33:52that's okay
33:53oh she says that's okay
33:55good girl
33:55lovely bit of work Sam
33:59take a grab
33:59thank you
34:03Sam completed the mission
34:07and he's stuck in a tunnel
34:11bitches of that ass
34:12next up are Amber and Farrah
34:15we need to bag this money
34:17are you are you here with me Sam?
34:19I've got you
34:19Jude I'm in
34:21come
34:23good girl
34:24here she comes
34:25that's a cheap dog
34:26I would invest a bullpen
34:28tunnel
34:30oh look at her fly
34:32she's coming right through you
34:34now this is going to be the interesting bit
34:50tunnel tunnel
34:51oh look at her fly
34:53she's coming right through you
34:56now this is going to be the interesting bit
35:00oh
35:01and she stopped
35:02in the middle of the tunnel
35:03come on
35:04get Kelly
35:05you're alright
35:06get Kelly
35:07it's okay
35:08oh yeah
35:09well done Sam
35:10oh we've done it Rue
35:13Farrah
35:13you can see that Farrah's turning around
35:16looking back into the tunnel
35:17she came back for the sausage
35:19up and down
35:20over the seesaw
35:21and through the finish line
35:22get Kelly
35:23Amber and Farrah
35:24well done
35:29tell Sam well done
35:31well done Sam
35:32I've never seen a tunnel like that before
35:34no
35:35with the shape yeah
35:36exactly it is a very unusual tunnel
35:38very unusual tunnel
35:40she's trying to tell people
35:41there's somebody in there
35:42yeah
35:42many congratulations
35:43thank you so much to Amber and Farrah
35:45good girl
35:47Farrah normally loves tunnels
35:49we always do a lot of work with tunnel traps
35:51because usually she will go for the tunnel
35:53and choose the tunnel over any other obstacle
35:55but I think because of the shape of this tunnel
35:57she's really confused so
35:58I don't blame her
36:00beautiful boy
36:01yeah
36:03yes
36:03well done
36:04oh sorry I just
36:05oh I'm sorry
36:06oh my god she just punctured Claire Bolden
36:09yes
36:10sorry I'm just I'm just I'm getting it all wrong
36:14nuisance isn't he
36:15my mum's gonna kill me for that
36:17yes good
36:17yes she should
36:19I love you
36:20so much
36:22oh
36:23ow
36:27there was one stage where Farrah was gonna come from behind
36:30and we thought oof
36:31that might be
36:32that would have been a bit dicey
36:33yeah
36:34oh
36:34mission alert
36:35what
36:36Harry
36:38posing as the umpire
36:39oh
36:40incredible
36:40such a good umpire
36:41you must fail James and Loki on a technicality twice
36:45forcing them to restart the course
36:47oh my god
36:49this mission is worth
36:513,000 pounds
36:52oh my god
36:54good friend
36:57oh
36:57oh
37:00yes Harry
37:01wow
37:01one
37:03two
37:04three
37:05seven pounds
37:10I'm gonna have to say hello sir
37:11yeah nice to see you Claire
37:12are you alright
37:13yes
37:13he's actually doing the voice
37:15he's doing his voice
37:15he's method acting
37:16show your character
37:17Harry
37:18how do you want me to play it
37:19hard and fast and fast and loose Cliff
37:22hard and fast fast and loose
37:24righto
37:26I'll try and take that advice on board
37:28ha ha ha ha
37:30that's great
37:31that's mortified
37:32right
37:34anything could happen
37:37Harry
37:38remember you're in charge
37:39your decision is final
37:42please welcome to the course
37:43James and his pomsky Loki
37:46James do you wanna just pause in front of me here
37:48obviously I'll be judging
37:50but I just want to introduce you to our referee for the day
37:53James it's a pleasure to meet you
37:55right way
37:55I am in charge at all times
37:57my decision will be final
37:58thank you very much
37:59tally-ho
38:00tally-ho and
38:01all the best
38:07James walks forward very calmly
38:09and he's going to ask Loki to sit
38:12place
38:12and stay
38:13place
38:15look at that for a fast backwards walk come here comes loki blow whistle
38:23but james has been ordered to restart sorry james loki just started before i made the signal so
38:31if you could just return to the start
38:36what do we need to do differently you didn't start when i say you you didn't didn't start
38:41when i said so uh if we could just do it again that would be fantastic and i'm just listening
38:48for one whistle one one whistle yes i'm in charge i have the governor here so you know
38:55not a problem so once again on the start line james and loki come here we go good boy good
39:07boy good boy good boy come on me on me good boy stand by to fail him on the poles
39:13up up
39:14up and over the a-frame being told by james to touch the white side now then oh very very
39:21good yeah keep going wait wait wait blow blow blow blow blow blow oh look because he missed
39:26one at the end he missed one at the end he missed the pole what was that wrong he missed
39:30a pole
39:31and caught the pole so we'd have to go back to the start again i'm afraid oh my god he's
39:37gonna get
39:37caught very sorry okay i'll restart the clock to hear you all the way back yes it's a complete
39:43restart oh he's livid bloody hell oh loki's so sweet
39:54here we go again loki's still full of enthusiasm james being extremely patient over the a-frame
40:00lovely touching now he knows how to do this good boy loki just going side to side now through
40:08the hoop good boy yeah it's gone loki through the tunnel good boy there we go and seesaw
40:16to finish yes brilliant good boy well done james fantastic crown oh superb loki and you jane
40:26thank you so much well done yeah and what a man to do it as well what a way to
40:34do it what a way to
40:36do it well done well done i would say the umpire was pretty harsh yeah i think um some of
40:45the rules
40:45are a little bit different than what i'm used to but those are the rules so i guess you have
40:48to abide
40:50to finish it off the way you did yeah on that umpire hand mate it was absolutely beautiful
40:57it was beautiful to behold look at him laying here though he's looking right at him hq alert
41:07joel your punishment is complete you may now leave the locker
41:20oh you actually smell a bit yeah good well well done some of you incredible thank you but i tell
41:39you
41:39what joel full credit for still being in that thank you very much i thought of it's part of me
41:44now you do look like it's a part of you missing actually in it mission alert i haven't seen one
41:53of these what does it mean celebrities it's time for your final sabotage mission oh
41:58oh no and this one is for claire oh and rue oh my love claire tell me what what during
42:10the winner's
42:10announcement ceremony you and rue must knock over the golden bone trophy so it is destroyed
42:17this mission is worth five thousand pounds smash it it's worth five grand fire we are rooting for you
42:39this just has to be believable because everyone's looking at her
42:44oh my god we're in how's she gonna do it how's claire actually gonna do this
42:48cleb holding yeah we all believe in you uh-huh
42:55pooches and parents i have made my decision
43:00and i can announce that the winner of the perfect pooch taking home this glorious trophy the golden bone
43:09is
43:16oh my gosh he's out he's out hello rue this is rue he's my little dog he's so sweet
43:23come to me rue rue rue rue rue rue what are you doing here rue rue rue no he's gone
43:29the wrong way
43:29he's gone the wrong way oh i'm so sorry hang on let me scoop him up because this is a
43:34good boy you're
43:34not meant to be here no you're not meant to be here oh my gosh you've got this claire you've
43:41got
43:41this you want to do all this with me what is it i know what is oh oh oh yes
43:49yes yes claire yes
43:55oh god guys can i get the art team here please quite quick
44:02thank you have we got another one no that's it i feel so sorry for claire she's mortified
44:09isn't she but the art department coming please
44:15guys this way please i'm so sorry i'm so sorry what's happened here i smashed it have
44:21we got another one of these we got another one claire claire claire but but but there's something
44:26there's something on the base of that not properly not well yeah i mean just blaming the bases
44:31but yeah but if you're working with animals unexpected things are going to happen it's not like the golden
44:39bone bone even matters the perfect pooch isn't even a real show is it claire
44:47he does have a point take a look at this
44:55gk you must convince elaine to spray her hair red
44:58do what lane i think this really works sam make the contestants strike doggy poses
45:05give us one paul give us one paul beautiful oh my god
45:10sam hide in the tunnel and ensure olive and farrah don't get through
45:21harry you must fail james and loki
45:23on the technicality loki just started before i made the signal oh my god oh jesus
45:35i give you sam thompson
45:39judy love
45:41gk berry
45:44mr harry redman
45:47and joel domit
45:50you all think that you've been taking part in the perfect pooch but you've actually been
45:57contestants on a brand new secret game show called celebrity sabotage
46:04well that's not all because earlier today one of you caught me red-handed in a bush and that person
46:11was
46:12i love you
46:13remy did you no way yeah i spotted well frankie spotted him for every sabotage mission we
46:20successfully completed we've been building up a prize pot oh my gosh and i can reveal that the prize
46:26pot you've won for everybody to share is 21 000 pounds oh my god which means you're going to go
46:36home
46:37with 4 200 pounds each oh my god we could not have done any of this without the help of
46:45claire balding
46:46ru isn't even my real dog i only met him yesterday i can't believe it's not the perfect pooch and
46:53it's celebrity sabotage i had no idea i am so excited to win money and i'm skint right now so
46:59i'm
47:00very excited and yeah we could have a holiday i absolutely cannot believe it i feel so overwhelmed
47:09and very emotional i can't stop crying oh my god oh my god oh my god oh my god
47:19we've won over four thousand pounds you don't know how much that means to me that is like
47:24you know that's yeah that's that's just yeah i will remember this for life yeah absolutely oh my god
47:37yeah i'll never live it down
47:43next time on celebrity sabotage
47:47do we kill people welcome to the backstabber let the games begin
47:54there's a rat in this team go go go go go go
47:58no way
48:17do
48:19do
48:28do
48:29do
48:32do
48:32do
Comments