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The Worst Film Festival Ever [Full Movie] [Latest Version]Full EP - Full
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00:00:29Transcription by CastingWords
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00:01:50shit. Tug Speedman, I'm just not the biggest fan. A father with money and an idiot with
00:01:58an expensive habit, the transition from drugs to movie making has been glorious for us.
00:02:04The problem with Tug Speedman movies are his endings. Well, it's not just the endings.
00:02:08We even got shortchanged on the nudity. Esme Presley used a body double. I just had a thought.
00:02:17What do you think if I asked you to present the awards?
00:02:19Oh, Gabriel, let me stop you there. I'm not presenting these awards.
00:02:23Well, that would be a mistake. A missed opportunity for you, Will the Farmer. With some brand.
00:02:31Gabriel, your little festival, it's a low-rent nightmare. Whatever bullshit you've done,
00:02:36to get this accredited by the Academy, it's a win here. Honestly, I don't want to be part
00:02:39of it when it all goes tits up. It's all showbiz, Will. And you are one of the greats. This
00:02:45is an
00:02:45opportunity that should be grabbed with both hands.
00:02:48Gabriel, please. Please don't bullshit me.
00:02:50Put on a show, Will. Razzle dazzle them. It will be you that they'll remember.
00:02:57I don't want to present an award to a shit Tarantino wannabe Tug Speedman.
00:03:01Truth is stranger than fiction, Will. Look, why don't you stay, listen to the key speaker talk,
00:03:08and then see how you feel. Do you know what? I don't feel well, Gabriel.
00:03:14That was funny, innit? If you've got a tractor, you're a farmer. If you don't, you're just a gardener.
00:03:19Do you know what? I am not sitting here listening to that.
00:03:25Gabriel? Are you alright?
00:03:28Uh-huh.
00:04:09Hello. Hello, giggles. Didn't know we were going to be a threesome tonight.
00:04:13What's the point in having a phone if you don't read your messages?
00:04:17Oh, shit. Sorry, no. I've been avoiding my dad all day. So, phone.
00:04:23I'm breaking up with you.
00:04:26Okay.
00:04:27It's not you. It's your dad.
00:04:31Yeah?
00:04:32Not in that way. Just the way he controls everything you do.
00:04:39I'm waiting for the punchline here, but I'm sensing it's not coming.
00:04:44Look, my dad is just my dad. Like, I'm my own boss.
00:04:52Okay, but that is five unread messages, which I'm not going to read.
00:04:57I'm with Giggles.
00:05:01Caroline, I thought we were going to make a movie together.
00:05:04I think we're both done with that.
00:05:07You know, you know what? I think I'm just gonna...
00:05:25Oh, God. Sorry, sorry, sorry, sorry, sorry.
00:05:54God.
00:05:55Dad, where have you been? He's having a heart attack.
00:05:59Will the farmer. And a cow jumped over the moon.
00:06:03No, Dad, I'm sorry.
00:06:04Gabriel, everything's going to be okay. Alan's here now.
00:06:08Listen to me, son.
00:06:11Do you want to make it in this business or fold shirts at the Chinese laundromat?
00:06:15Pledge.
00:06:16How sure are we that this was a heart attack?
00:06:20Shit, no, the film festival.
00:06:22The film festival goes ahead.
00:06:26You're in charge.
00:06:27Gabriel, talk about this at the hospital. Where is this ambulance?
00:06:30Ambulance is on the way.
00:06:32No, Dad, Dad, cancel the film festival.
00:06:34Alan, I am not willing to donate a kidney, but I am willing to watch you die slowly if you're
00:06:41looking for that kind of thing.
00:06:42Huh.
00:06:45Any idea what you're going to do?
00:06:47No, no, Will, I don't.
00:06:49Well, good luck with everything.
00:06:51Will the farmer to present best picture?
00:06:56You go, man.
00:07:15I do not want to be somebody.
00:07:19Now, we're not going to be somebody.
00:07:23I'm not.
00:07:24I'm not.
00:07:25I'm not.
00:07:25Be somebody I'm not
00:07:30Standing in my shoes
00:07:32I got this feeling that I'm always gonna lose
00:07:36I guess I know someday I'm gonna have to choose
00:07:41Cause I don't wanna hide away
00:07:44Yeah, yeah
00:07:46Somebody I'm not
00:07:49I don't wanna be somebody I'm not
00:07:54Standing in my shoes
00:07:56Someone I'm not
00:07:58Cause I don't wanna be somebody I'm not
00:08:04Standing in the line
00:08:06I never know when it's gonna be my time
00:08:11I got some markings I don't really wanna shine
00:08:15Cause I don't wanna hide away
00:08:18Yeah, yeah
00:08:21Somebody I'm not
00:08:24I don't wanna be somebody I'm not
00:08:28Standing in the shoes of someone I'm not
00:08:32Cause I don't wanna be somebody I'm not
00:08:37So it goes
00:08:42Seems like I'm running blind
00:08:47But oh, you know
00:08:52It's like I'm stuck in time
00:09:16Somebody I'm not
00:09:19Somebody I'm not
00:09:19I don't wanna be somebody I'm not
00:09:23Standing in the shoes of somebody I'm not
00:09:29You know
00:09:30You know
00:09:31I think I'm gonna faint if we don't eat soon
00:09:33There's a Costa Starbucks back at the station
00:09:36I can get those anywhere
00:09:38I need authentic Edinburghan food
00:09:42I don't know if it's an actual word
00:09:44But it is now anyway
00:09:47Um, there's a greasy spoon three blocks from here
00:09:52Authentic Scottish cafe it says
00:09:54Perfect word
00:09:55I'm gonna use it in a sentence
00:09:57I just did
00:10:05Where are all these Scottish fruits have been sold about?
00:10:09You're gonna cop a flower pot if you don't move them trotters
00:10:15At her butt
00:10:17Oh my god
00:10:26Are you sure?
00:10:28Of course
00:10:29She's got no reason to lie, I sure
00:10:31Can we go home then?
00:10:33Alan's sorting it out
00:10:35That can't be good
00:10:42Come on
00:10:53How's it going?
00:10:55A few technical issues
00:10:56But then again it's an old laptop
00:10:58So I probably need some replacing
00:10:59She means your dad, Alan
00:11:01Oh god
00:11:03Yeah, better
00:11:05I think
00:11:06He left me a three-page text message this morning
00:11:08That he signed off with
00:11:09And don't mess this up
00:11:12So safe to say he's back at the farm on this first door
00:11:16That'll be fine
00:11:19See, he's working
00:11:21And gone again
00:11:23Yeah
00:11:23Oh, okay
00:11:27He's fucked
00:11:33Will!
00:11:35Gabriel's on the mend, that's good
00:11:36Will, I still need a key speaker
00:11:38Please check out time for me
00:11:40No, Will, please
00:11:41I'll give you anything, okay?
00:11:43I have a kidney you can have
00:11:44It's barely been used
00:11:45When you get chased by a pack of taxidermists
00:11:48Don't play dead
00:12:06Is there no one here to meet us?
00:12:08It's fine, we'll just grab a taxi
00:12:11Did you not order car service?
00:12:13Oh, I'm sorry
00:12:14I'll just bong it on my credit card, shall I?
00:12:17There's no budget for this trip
00:12:22Seriously
00:12:31Good news or bad?
00:12:32My father would say this is a challenge
00:12:35So bad then?
00:12:36Yeah, it's not good
00:12:36One of my key speakers has pulled out
00:12:38He's got the flu
00:12:39One of the criteria for qualifying for an Academy Award
00:12:42Is you must provide at least two key speakers to tell you movies are good
00:12:49Alright, okay, it's fine, just breathe
00:12:54That's it
00:12:54I'm not the first guy to have a panic attack on us
00:12:57Look, if my dad doesn't kill me, Tug Speedman will
00:13:00God's was a good movie
00:13:01The ending wasn't much though
00:13:03No, his father is paying for the festival
00:13:06You know this isn't your fault, right?
00:13:08Yes, but my dad can make it my fault
00:13:10Right, first things last
00:13:12What's a key speaker?
00:13:14Oh, I don't know
00:13:15It's got to be an actor or a celebrity
00:13:17Someone who can talk about their experience making movies with the other filmmakers
00:13:27Rachel
00:13:28Oh shit, yeah, Rachel Warren
00:13:30Who is Rachel Warren?
00:13:35She did that stupid werewolf movie with Jess
00:13:38It's in the festival
00:13:39Can you get her?
00:13:40Yeah, I know her well
00:13:42She'd love to come and be your celebrity
00:13:49You have no idea where we're going
00:13:52Yes, I do
00:13:59It's this way, come on
00:14:02We made a movie about Chinese families in the 18th century
00:14:06Stories about mothers and daughters
00:14:11This country makes no sense
00:14:15This country makes no sense
00:14:33I am the only one in the 18th century
00:14:36This country makes no sense
00:14:37This country makes no sense
00:14:48This country makes no sense
00:14:56When they don't have any problems
00:14:59This country makes no sense
00:15:01This country makes no sense
00:15:10do i think we can win fuck yeah what babe well forget winning i mean i'm just here for the
00:15:17fit
00:15:18guys with their sexy scottish brog i mean i haven't met any just yet but i did spot this
00:15:24guy he looked a little bit like chris hemsworth on the plane you know the guy from thor i mean
00:15:28given the chance i don't i was the one you do know i'm not one of your pals don't you
00:15:34you know i can't
00:15:36just unhear this stuff i will not really hungry nominations for best actress are fran whittaker
00:15:48for hey mr dj
00:16:00i can explain i want you to leave out of my house
00:16:13what's black pudding it's spoke of beef blood mixed with oatmeal and fried are we in the same country
00:16:20no we're in scotland as we presently for gods of shodditch your sword skills do you a disservice
00:16:28sir the seal calls to you but it is lying that may be so the seal is our portal to
00:16:36the future
00:16:37it is the devil's work then the devil does fine work how are the nominations oh yeah it's in the
00:16:45back
00:16:58hi guys uh we're the kidnap gang and we do kidnap pranks this is my partner darren hello hello
00:17:05now uh obviously we've we've entered two films into the festivals which doubles our chances of winning
00:17:12doing something but look i gotta warn you when we're about there's always some fuckery afoot
00:17:19idiots both my dad and my uncle well gabriel the guy who runs the festival um he invited us along
00:17:25he thought we would be some good entertainment
00:17:42joking we got her you didn't she said she'll do it thanks a little madam oh thank you thank you
00:17:47thank you so much sorry i'm not really a hugger but you know what i mean she said she'd like
00:17:52working
00:17:52with me and the movies nominated in the festival you'll cover travel and bar bill yeah bar bill
00:17:58yeah but don't worry about that now you have a speaker hey is this an exclusive party or can
00:18:05anybody join in tug you're here alert the paparazzi that's good that's good things do no seriously
00:18:10alert the paparazzi uh your dad has press at the awards
00:18:16how are you jade and what movie are you with sex well your film sounds interesting and equally your
00:18:25name both subjects i'd love to learn more about tug speedman actor writer filmmaker triple tread
00:18:36tug have you checked in yet it's actually just this way i'll show you where it is i want that
00:18:41review
00:18:49listen man i didn't want to say anything in there i didn't want to embarrass you
00:18:55there was no one there to meet us at the airport oh i i didn't know we were you know
00:19:00what technical
00:19:01issues get it together man you do realize what a big deal this is to have me and my movie
00:19:10playing
00:19:10exclusively at your festival of course um i thought i played in ireland
00:19:17that wasn't a film festival that was a tent with a projector right no this this is the one we've
00:19:25been
00:19:25waiting for academy qualifying you do realize this is going to be huge for my movie and for your festival
00:19:36yeah so get it together
00:19:44we're in room 175
00:19:47esme presley
00:19:49that's my name don't wear it out
00:19:55don't mess this up
00:19:57right
00:20:01please let me help you with your bag um i'd be much obliged he likes people to think i'm his
00:20:06assistant yeah he's uh certainly a character with a small c no he's definitely something with a
00:20:13small c
00:20:22we're gonna need to separate these
00:20:25oh like like a twin room
00:20:28don't get me started tud likes his space to sleep proper diva
00:20:36you can put that down oh god yeah sorry um
00:20:41is there a turndown service or do i tip
00:20:44hell no no i'm i'm i'm just helping
00:20:47just a thanks then
00:20:51instant coffee
00:20:52uh i i liked your movie
00:20:55well no i liked your role in it
00:21:00it's okay you can say it's crap it is
00:21:02no no it's not crap it's just uh it's it's unusual uh it's time traveling gangsters so
00:21:09but it's it's up for best picture and it's probably gonna get the oscar qualifying spot so
00:21:12what do i know
00:21:14alan that's your name right
00:21:16the festival director's son
00:21:19tug speedman's a hack and worse a hack with a father with money
00:21:23the writer's inspiration for gods of shoreditch was a story with strong female characters who brought about the end of
00:21:29the world of men
00:21:31instead tug turned a brilliant script into a wannabe gangster action movie with so much nudity it could have been
00:21:38set in ancient rome
00:21:39oh i mean i thought that it was sorry darling body doubles for those scenes
00:21:44oh no no i wasn't being weird i was just alan it's fine i limit who sees me naked including
00:21:49tug
00:21:51oh you thought
00:21:54alan no hasn't been like that for a very long time
00:21:57tug i imagine is currently down in the bar flirting with any tart unlucky enough to be with an air
00:22:02shot
00:22:10i know his father paid for the movie to win and i'm fine with it
00:22:13oh
00:22:16alan
00:22:17yes
00:22:20do you want a coffee
00:22:26that's that's my dad um i should
00:22:28i didn't see him answer is something okay
00:22:30uh complicated uh but yeah
00:22:34uh
00:22:36uh
00:22:39uh
00:22:45uh
00:22:50uh
00:22:55uh
00:23:00uh
00:23:01hello alan
00:23:03you all right
00:23:04um
00:23:05yeah all good um... the abscond gate is here
00:23:07okay
00:23:14yes we made a movie called sex
00:23:28At first there was nothing, then there was woman.
00:23:44So the role of the woman is the sole provider.
00:23:48The one given the pain is the only one that can take it away.
00:23:51My role is to assist of clients, but I'm also an actress.
00:23:55Not again with that stupid werewolf movie with Rachel.
00:24:00Rachel was amazing to work with.
00:24:03And you too, but both equally.
00:24:07Yeah, of course. Do you know what, whatever, I don't care.
00:24:10Can somebody take this off please?
00:24:24You have 12 finalists in your festival this year?
00:24:28Yes, they are the final 12. The opening ceremony is tonight and there will be a party.
00:24:36Not quite a party person.
00:24:40Each film has been individually assessed and announced within the required time period?
00:24:46Yes, no formal queries from the other candidates.
00:24:50And my father has done all of the assessments.
00:24:54Your father, yes, spoke to him many times.
00:24:59On the phone, never met.
00:25:02Where is he?
00:25:05Currently sorting out, um, something or other.
00:25:08You know what these crazy filmmakers are like.
00:25:13No!
00:25:21I'm absolutely mortified.
00:25:23I didn't mind really.
00:25:25It was kind of fun.
00:25:26A bunch of kids them too, honestly.
00:25:36Very amusing.
00:25:38My preference is to sit near the back and on the aisle for each showing.
00:25:45Yes, we can accommodate that.
00:25:48Your father is the signatory for the festival. Have him speak to me at his earliest convenience.
00:25:54Of course, no problem.
00:25:57Would you excuse me? I need to go and sort out a thing.
00:26:38Good morning to you.
00:26:42Beat an actress.
00:26:44Yes, I am.
00:26:46Well.
00:26:47No, no, no, no, no.
00:26:48You have certainly got the look.
00:26:50As if.
00:26:51He's like some old guy.
00:26:54You play your cards, right?
00:26:56I might just let you audition for me sometime.
00:26:59So, obviously networking is the best part of these events.
00:27:03Before Tug realises I'm a tease.
00:27:06His next movie will already be out starring me.
00:27:13Thought you might be hungry.
00:27:16But the breakfasts are meant to be for the film contestants.
00:27:20But yeah, they're not gonna miss it, are they?
00:27:23They're adjudicated by your story?
00:27:25Mm-hmm.
00:27:26Jade.
00:27:27Ah.
00:27:27How is your father doing?
00:27:28Still in the hospital.
00:27:30And I think, I think Tug Speedman might just kill me when he finds out.
00:27:35So have you.
00:27:36I always wanted to be an actress then.
00:27:38Come on, move along Romeo.
00:27:40There's a cue here.
00:27:42I'll talk to you later.
00:27:47You seem to be doing okay so far, just a few more days.
00:27:51Tug will be happy once he gets his coveted academy place.
00:27:54Do you like working with him?
00:27:55You don't work with Tug.
00:27:57You experience the carnage he leaves in his wake.
00:28:00You get used to the crazy after a few years.
00:28:02Yeah, I was gonna pitch my film to him.
00:28:04The God Particle.
00:28:06Yeah, I optioned the third book, but I tell you what,
00:28:09an award-nominated actress would look great on the cast list.
00:28:12This is a shit business, Alan.
00:28:14You can do your best performance
00:28:15and some hack director fumbles the ball in the edit.
00:28:19Hey, no.
00:28:20Your character Joe Marsh in Gods of Shortage was amazing.
00:28:22Tets and ass don't make a movie.
00:28:24At least my body double had a good bum.
00:28:30The God Particle is a black ops super soldier
00:28:35who seeks vengeance after they have been betrayed
00:28:38on a mission gone terribly wrong.
00:28:40Good pitch.
00:28:41Yeah, but without Esme Presley in it,
00:28:43it's just another silly spy adventure.
00:28:48Actually, can you just give me a full second, please?
00:28:53Alan!
00:28:54My man!
00:28:55How are we?
00:28:56Right, are we all set for my screening?
00:28:57Yes, of course, um...
00:28:59Emmett?
00:28:59Emmett, yes.
00:29:00Yes.
00:29:00No, it's only because I heard there was some technical issues.
00:29:03Who told you that?
00:29:04No, never mind.
00:29:05No, everything's fine.
00:29:06We're good to go.
00:29:07Perfect.
00:29:07So yeah, we made a horror movie.
00:29:09Yes, I play a maid.
00:29:12Don't you play a maid in Jade's movie too?
00:29:14Typecasting is a good thing.
00:29:16Do you actually watch the movies?
00:29:17Have you seen mine?
00:29:18It's got Rachel on it.
00:29:19Er, no, my dad watches the films.
00:29:20It's more his thing.
00:29:21Oh, hi!
00:29:23Hey.
00:29:24Um, the breakfasts are actually just for the film candidates, so, er...
00:29:28I appreciate it.
00:29:29Yeah.
00:29:30Yeah, no, so that means...
00:29:33Sorry.
00:29:34But what if I was a film contestant?
00:29:39Okay, okay, look.
00:29:41If you want to go, like, just, like, wait in the lobby, and wait till they're all gone,
00:29:44I'll come give you a shout, and...
00:29:46Had they printed the application form from the library.
00:29:48That was a nightmare while I had ink.
00:29:50So, like, sorry.
00:29:51I ain't taking a blame for that.
00:29:53Hang on, you've made a movie?
00:29:55Sure.
00:29:55Just like all the cats up in this geth.
00:29:57It's a personal story.
00:29:59A flick about lovin' on the streets.
00:30:01Mic in your face.
00:30:04That's, that's actually really impressive.
00:30:06I'm not sure how you'd do that.
00:30:08Check it.
00:30:09Shot on a phone.
00:30:11Edited at a library.
00:30:12The equipment was 90s.
00:30:13But it's all good.
00:30:15Er, well, that is all good, but, um...
00:30:19The applications closed, er, two months ago now, so...
00:30:22Understands completely.
00:30:24But listen here, I ain't interested in what you're selling.
00:30:26For me, this is a golden opportunity of honest food
00:30:29and a bed for the night.
00:30:31Look, please, I really don't know how else to say this,
00:30:35but all of the final films have been announced.
00:30:39We can't add this.
00:30:41That's how it is.
00:30:44Sorry. What's your name?
00:30:45Mike. Iron Mike.
00:30:47Wow. Intimidating name.
00:30:49It's cause where I'm bedding down.
00:30:51I have like three iron baths tied together.
00:30:53So, Iron Mike.
00:30:54Makes perfect sense.
00:30:56Listen, Alan's gonna take your application
00:30:59because he's good at problem solving
00:31:00and he very much wants to impress me.
00:31:04So, Alan, I was thinking...
00:31:06What was that?
00:31:07Simple.
00:31:08You did a very kind thing for a homeless man
00:31:09and it did impress me.
00:31:10Okay, yeah, that is very nice,
00:31:12but all the films have already been announced, Esme.
00:31:14I don't think he cares.
00:31:17Morning.
00:31:18Oh, shit.
00:31:19I mean, morning!
00:31:21Your father down for breakfast.
00:31:23You know, he was, but he's an early riser,
00:31:26so you know how it is.
00:31:27We're just going to meet him now.
00:31:29The signatory is a very important part of the process.
00:31:33Of course.
00:31:41I played Lord Harrington of Mortar.
00:31:48Beast must die.
00:31:52Whatever you think's best.
00:31:58I'm now unarmed.
00:32:01I'll prevent you from doing your duty.
00:32:06Maybe she should kill us both.
00:32:10You've been bitten, mistress.
00:32:16The wolf...
00:32:20...courses through my veins.
00:32:23Run!
00:32:27So, yeah, it's a movie with a werewolf in it.
00:32:31Is this the heights that we're together?
00:32:34In the movie.
00:32:36Look.
00:32:37I spent a lot of time and energy into this ending.
00:32:41And trust me, once people see what we've done here...
00:32:45...it's best film winners might.
00:32:47Ours.
00:32:49And everyone that was in the movie.
00:32:57Look at us.
00:33:02That's it.
00:33:20That's what I saw.
00:33:20So, we've done it with my love.
00:33:29Agnes I just
00:33:30I'm sorry for frightening you Lady Harrington
00:33:37Callum
00:33:39Go back to the house
00:33:41Elizabeth
00:33:45Now
00:34:10No, no, not now
00:34:12Everyone look into the show
00:34:20God damn it
00:34:21No one saw the ending
00:34:23It was just an utter shit show
00:34:41I was pretty awesome as the maid
00:34:53Are you okay?
00:35:05Are you fucking kidding me?
00:35:08Did you just leave and come back so you could do that?
00:35:11Take some water
00:35:13Fuck water!
00:35:14I want some fucking cocaine!
00:35:17Oh fuck
00:35:18Just call my fucking sponsor
00:35:23You
00:35:25Is your pathetic father gonna make it or not?
00:35:28Tell me
00:35:28I don't know but I'm obviously hoping
00:35:31It's not his fault
00:35:33Of course you knew
00:35:38Everybody knows except poor old Tug
00:35:41It wasn't like that
00:35:42Look as long as the adjudicator doesn't find out we're fine
00:35:45We're fine
00:35:48We're fine
00:35:49Yeah we're fine
00:35:50Yeah we're fine
00:35:51Until he visits your poor little siebel dad
00:35:54On his fucking deathbed
00:35:56Tug his father's still alive
00:35:58Take that back
00:35:59I'll tell you one thing boyo
00:36:01He's not gonna be alive when my dad gets his hands on him
00:36:04Or if you make this go catch up
00:36:11You
00:36:13I'm going to the bar
00:36:15Fuck my sponsor
00:36:36Really?
00:36:38I thought you had to call your sponsor
00:36:42You didn't drink it
00:36:44But you thought about it
00:36:46And you promised.
00:36:49Go away, Esme.
00:36:51I'm not cleaning up after you again.
00:36:55Well, do you know what, Mum?
00:36:58Do you know what I'm going to get you for Christmas?
00:37:00A nice big wooden cross.
00:37:02So next time you feel unappreciated for all your sacrifices,
00:37:07you can climb on up there and nail yourself to it.
00:37:17Marcus?
00:37:26What are you?
00:37:28What are you doing?
00:37:34Yes, the movie did well.
00:37:36We are very proud.
00:37:46The adjudicator, of course, he picks the winner.
00:37:50You are good, right?
00:37:52That is not correct.
00:37:55He's just an official. Gabriel chose the winner.
00:37:58I know, Alan, and I hope we have made a big impression on him and his father Gabriel.
00:38:03We do rap movie next.
00:38:07There was a lot of nudity in Gods.
00:38:29Yes, well, nudity was very important in our story of Gods of Shoreditch.
00:38:35But some were more comfortable than others.
00:38:39I think sometimes nudity is considered controversial in some cultures
00:38:44because it challenges the standards of modesty.
00:38:48Yes, exactly. Nudity, it's a state of mind.
00:38:52I'll happily wander around the house all day with no clothes on.
00:38:56Just let it all hang out. Feel that breeze.
00:39:00It's quite liberating.
00:39:03Would I be shallow if I said size doesn't matter?
00:39:11It's perfectly adequate.
00:39:17Is it true that it's all a farce?
00:39:21I don't really know.
00:39:23Well, you seem very close with Alan.
00:39:26He must have told you something.
00:39:28This is starting to feel like an intervention.
00:39:30Or maybe an interrogation.
00:39:32It's because everyone is hiding something.
00:39:35Esme, we're just curious.
00:39:38This festival is really important to us.
00:39:41We have vested interest.
00:39:45Look, I don't want to speak out of turn and I understand that you guys are anxious,
00:39:50but really you have to speak to Alan about this.
00:39:52Oh, we will. Don't you worry about that.
00:39:58The mountain has arrived.
00:40:01You know, we all know that you're here.
00:40:04Can you help with this, please?
00:40:05They know, Alan.
00:40:06You might as well just tell them the truth.
00:40:08The truth will set you free.
00:40:10Okay.
00:40:11I've spoken to my dad in the hospital.
00:40:13He is getting better.
00:40:14It is a question of whether he can do the sign-off, though.
00:40:18No, he can't.
00:40:19Not while he's in hospital.
00:40:20What's the sign-off?
00:40:22The festival director has to sign off on the adjudicator's paperwork.
00:40:26Can't Alan do that?
00:40:28Are you the festival director, Alan?
00:40:30No, I'm the...
00:40:31Yeah, not the festival director, then.
00:40:34What's that smell?
00:40:37Listen, monkey boy, I swear to God and the Sonny Jesus,
00:40:42if you don't find a solution, I'm going to dropkick your head.
00:40:46And I've done seven days.
00:40:48Intensive stage combat.
00:40:50You watch yourself.
00:41:03Forget the gold particle this is producing.
00:41:06Oh, yeah, just without the money or the credit.
00:41:09You'll cut out for greater things.
00:41:11Yeah, well, you clearly haven't met my dad.
00:41:13He's going to kill my movie.
00:41:16Still living in his shadow, just like Tug.
00:41:18He'd own own self to be true.
00:41:20Yeah, well, that's really easy for you to say.
00:41:22You're an award-winning actress with a string of movie titles behind you,
00:41:25and I'm just...
00:41:25And you're currently a festival director.
00:41:29Ah, yeah, I see.
00:41:30Trying to sway influence with the festival director to try and win an award.
00:41:33It's not going to work.
00:41:35Oh, my, what's a girl got to do?
00:41:39Mate, borrow your shaver?
00:41:42Yeah, sure, whatever you need.
00:41:44Keep that towel on and I'll cut your hair.
00:41:48Hotel cleaning service?
00:41:49For sure.
00:41:51Mike, can we grab a look at your movie?
00:41:54Sure. It's your funeral.
00:42:05Well, this is it.
00:42:06This is where Iron Mike is staying tonight.
00:42:11Because I did have three iron bath tubs.
00:42:13They were all tied together.
00:42:15And it was really, really, really good.
00:42:17Always get a wee check on the buns,
00:42:19because you just don't know what's on these buns.
00:42:22Mike, this is good.
00:42:26And phone boxes.
00:42:29Always keep your eye out for them.
00:42:30A lot of people miss them.
00:42:31It's really good.
00:42:50Fuck!
00:43:12You, uh, you calm down, yeah?
00:43:17Anything to help yourself, you usually do.
00:43:21I wake up this morning and you're gone.
00:43:23I didn't think you'd notice they're intensely snoring.
00:43:28I'm at a loss here, Esme.
00:43:30What's going on?
00:43:33Don't you remember the little talk me and you had?
00:43:35I support you, you support me.
00:43:39That's all I ever do, is support you.
00:43:42Yeah, well, you've been missing an action all weekend.
00:43:46I've been here all this time.
00:43:47The question is, where have you been?
00:43:51Clever.
00:43:53How's that working out for you?
00:43:57That's the thing about relationships.
00:43:59They give you reason to live.
00:44:02Revenge.
00:44:04Hey, hey.
00:44:05Do you remember this?
00:44:06I've heard there was a secret chord.
00:44:10No.
00:44:10That David played, it pleased the Lord.
00:44:14But you don't really care for movies, do you?
00:44:20It goes like this, the fourth, the fifth.
00:44:23Sit down.
00:44:24The major falls, the minor lifts, the baffling composing, hallelujah.
00:44:34No?
00:44:36Those old cheap moves aren't going to work on me anymore.
00:44:39I've got plenty of new cheap moves for you.
00:44:41How are you going to face all these people when they find out you paid for the award?
00:44:45The question is, babe, do you feel paid for?
00:45:01Esme!
00:45:06That's bad, Gigi, mate.
00:45:07You need to let her take a moment.
00:45:08But she's upset.
00:45:11Having your bridges burned is never going to be easy.
00:45:13But she's strong.
00:45:27I think he's better from an older person.
00:45:31But this is your fault, Jess.
00:45:33You were in a fucking movie!
00:45:35She was very Gibbyan as an actress.
00:45:38Okay, can one of you please just tell me what's going on?
00:45:43Rachel can't do it.
00:45:44Oh!
00:45:45We forgot Jade posted on Rachel's socials that she was so bitchy she's probably playing the werewolf.
00:45:51Why?
00:45:52Because it was my role!
00:45:54Oh!
00:46:00Wow, what a transformation.
00:46:04Hey, got meself some new threads.
00:46:09It's gonna be a long night.
00:46:24I mean, this is getting ridiculous.
00:46:29Sorry.
00:46:30Caroline!
00:46:31Hi!
00:46:32Um...
00:46:33Hey, Alan.
00:46:35Could I be the most beautiful girl in the world?
00:46:39Uh...
00:46:39Caroline, wow.
00:46:41Um...
00:46:41What are you doing here?
00:46:43I mean, I'm glad that you are, but...
00:46:45Why?
00:46:47Seems most men take advantage.
00:46:50Except you, of course.
00:46:52Giggles was a mistake.
00:46:56I'll still do your announcements.
00:46:57If you want me.
00:46:59Really?
00:47:00Oh, Caroline, absolutely!
00:47:01That'd be amazing!
00:47:02Yes, yes!
00:47:02Thank you!
00:47:03Thank you so much!
00:47:05Wow!
00:47:06Slaying it, Mike!
00:47:07Nobody even seen a man on a suit?
00:47:10Ah, she's just getting a bit excited.
00:47:12Our film's showing today.
00:47:14Malicious intent.
00:47:15Gangster comedy.
00:47:16Has malicious intent even got a chance?
00:47:19Well, it's a lower budget than Tugs film, but...
00:47:21Hopefully we spent the money where it really mattered.
00:47:25We got the secret ingredient.
00:47:27Me?
00:47:28I'm the secret ingredient.
00:47:30Well, look, when Millie was ten, we'd done a short film together called Daddy's Girl.
00:47:37Those clips are a springboard for malicious intent.
00:47:41It's like the story picks up from that point.
00:47:45She was much cuter then.
00:47:47Not such a pain in the arse.
00:47:52Well, the best advice I can give is that you never know who's going to grow up to be famous,
00:47:57so just make yourself available.
00:47:59Oh, don't be a tart.
00:48:01Well, I wish it was Beyonce.
00:48:06I've been looking for you.
00:48:08Found me.
00:48:09Well, I thought maybe you wanted some space.
00:48:11Good choice.
00:48:12Or you could just kill all the girls prettier than me.
00:48:15Or maybe just tug.
00:48:20Where are all the good guys, Dad?
00:48:22In the heart or in the head?
00:48:24You think I'm a good guy?
00:48:27Well, when your instinct tells you to do something, you don't do it.
00:48:31So maybe when it tells you not to, that's when you should.
00:48:35Oh.
00:48:37Read the room, Alan. This is the consensual kissing part.
00:48:44Caroline's back.
00:48:50Your ex that caught with your best friend, Caroline?
00:48:52Yeah.
00:48:54She wants to present the awards.
00:48:57That's good, I guess.
00:48:58Great for you.
00:48:59Well, the whole thing with giggles was a mistake.
00:49:01I mean, I always thought so, but I guess she's realised it too, so...
00:49:05Yeah, no, great.
00:49:06So pleased for you.
00:49:09Are you okay?
00:49:10Yeah, just peachy.
00:49:12Learning lessons all the time.
00:49:15Right, um, um, sorry, just one second, thank you.
00:49:30Ladies and gentlemen, I would be happy to present our next film, Malicious Intent.
00:49:36No, no, no, no, wait, wait, wait!
00:49:45Um...
00:49:46My apologies.
00:49:49There will now be a short interval as I need a word with the festival director.
00:49:52Shut up.
00:49:55Young man.
00:49:58This is totally irregular.
00:50:01My paperwork should have been signed and she mailed off this morning.
00:50:07Look, I understand. He's just busy.
00:50:10He fobbed me off with that before.
00:50:12Where is your father? He is festival director.
00:50:15Fully understand.
00:50:17End of the next movie, he'll be here.
00:50:18Yeah, listen, young man.
00:50:20This might seem like a game to you, but it's also my job.
00:50:24And I don't like explaining to my line managers that I can't manage a simple task such as getting a...
00:50:31Signature!
00:50:33Stand on me, I will sort it.
00:50:37It's our big day.
00:50:40Er, yeah, it is.
00:51:03I curse them to hell, as her both fought the swell.
00:51:08Our ship danced like a moth in the firelight.
00:51:12Wild horses rode high as the devil passed by.
00:51:17Taking souls into Hades by twilight.
00:51:23Five weeks out to sea, we were now forty-three.
00:51:28We buried our comrades each morning.
00:51:31In our own slime, we were lost in the time.
00:51:36Endless night we were dawning.
00:51:43Oh, I wish I was back home in Derry.
00:51:49Oh, I wish I was...
00:51:54So essentially, it's like a black ops agent.
00:51:57Oh, oh, Caroline, you have to meet our president movie star, Esme Presley.
00:52:02Today everyone's a star.
00:52:04They're all billed as starring or also starring without earning that recognition.
00:52:08Caroline, you're back.
00:52:10From outer space.
00:52:12I notice you cry a lot in your films.
00:52:15Your tear ducts must be very close to your bladder.
00:52:18Has Alan talked you into the presenting?
00:52:20All these Best Actress nominees and I'm just thinking, shut up and get a salad.
00:52:25Uh, so, um, Caroline thinks that we should just come clean with your adjudicator.
00:52:30Not the best idea.
00:52:32Is that your own thought or do you need a screenwriter?
00:52:37Caroline, we should be friends.
00:52:41Yes, I agree. Best friends.
00:52:46I think that ending needs work.
00:52:47How about less silly questions and a bit more shut the hell up?
00:52:51How did you make her look younger in the film?
00:52:54Was that computer stuff?
00:52:56This is a man who thinks the plural of goose is sheep.
00:53:00I ain't saying anything.
00:53:01So then, your, uh...
00:53:03Your style's clearly more...
00:53:05...gangster than it is horror?
00:53:07Hey, that character played Dudley in your movie?
00:53:10He was awesome.
00:53:15Joy.
00:53:16All right, ladies and gentlemen, our next film is...
00:53:22Sex.
00:53:24Have fun.
00:53:25We'll see you soon.
00:53:26See you soon.
00:53:27Yeah, we'll see you soon.
00:53:28Exactly.
00:53:58I don't wait for no one There's no escape from what I must do
00:54:06Turn around and bend over I think it's time to leave
00:54:17I'm young, I'm all dressed up, I'm on my way to marry the asexual awakening
00:54:22and there's 290 years separating me from the films of Kevin Smith
00:54:28I mean it's true If time don't wait for no one
00:54:38How can I wait for you?
00:54:42Tough love
00:54:44The cards are on the table
00:54:48Is complete love
00:54:50Is complete love
00:54:52The cards will do
00:55:02Didn't fancy sex then?
00:55:04It was beauty that killed the beast
00:55:07Malicious intent should be good competition for Tug
00:55:10It might blindside him
00:55:13We can hope so
00:55:14But look I'm probably the most non-competitive person here so I win
00:55:20Secrets and lies
00:55:23Come with me
00:55:28This is bang out of order
00:55:29Have you any idea how much shit I went through to get the day off today?
00:55:33This ain't my day job you know
00:55:35It's not Alan's fault
00:55:37Well this does land squarely on Alan's door
00:55:40I was thinking since no one saw the ending of my film
00:55:44Can we screen it again maybe?
00:55:48Look at you all of you
00:55:50No problem is too big we can't fix it if we work together
00:55:54What's that?
00:55:54Esme
00:55:55You're beautiful on the inside
00:55:57But it's important you understand your limitations
00:56:00Alan
00:56:02What I'm saying is
00:56:03If anyone actually saw the ending of the film
00:56:05Then people would know that my character disguises himself as older
00:56:08I will play your dad
00:56:10And I will sign off this whole festival
00:56:16What?
00:56:17Got range
00:56:21Him
00:56:24I can play Gabriel
00:56:25That accent's incredibly tricky
00:56:27If you don't do it then all of this is over for everyone
00:56:32Hello son
00:56:33How are you?
00:56:35Oh god this has disaster written all over it
00:56:39Something is missing
00:56:40Could be range
00:56:43The meanness
00:56:44Yeah Gabriel is an arsehole
00:56:47Oi
00:56:48I'm not happy and I don't like it
00:56:50Oh my god
00:56:53There's me
00:56:55Is my foot scrub in there?
00:56:58Yes it's gonna be brilliant
00:57:02And bring me a razor as well will you?
00:57:05Yeah
00:57:08Yeah
00:57:22You've been blowing hot and cold me all day
00:57:25Everything's fine in my world
00:57:28You might want to tell your face that
00:57:31This is a big day for us
00:57:33You bought the award tug
00:57:35Hardly meritable
00:57:37I read a book about this once
00:57:38You sure it was a book?
00:57:40You sure it wasn't nothing?
00:57:42This is show business
00:57:43Not care business
00:57:46You're like all the worst parts of a girlfriend
00:57:49And do you not want to meet a producer?
00:57:52And just for that when the movie comes out I'm gonna get Matt Damon to play you
00:57:56Oh
00:57:58Well maybe I'll get Jade to play you then
00:58:01Jade?
00:58:02Yeah
00:58:03Your new producing partner
00:58:05A little girl on girl action
00:58:10I'm joking
00:58:12Unless
00:58:13Unless you'd be up for it
00:58:22Geez I was only joking
00:58:23It's not a joke
00:58:25I'm feeling lost
00:58:27Hey
00:58:28I've heard there was a secret code
00:58:30Stop
00:58:31That Michael played it please the Lord
00:58:33Stop
00:58:36If I explained it I think I'd only confuse you
00:58:41Do you know what?
00:58:43I think it's times like this
00:58:44If I wasn't a multi award winning talented filmmaker
00:58:48And you were just an ordinary girl
00:58:50Then we wouldn't have these problems
00:58:53On Gods of Shoreditch I was supposed to be an associate producer
00:58:57But in reality I was more of a dog's body
00:59:00Seriously this again
00:59:02I told you
00:59:03It's whatever it takes to get the shot
00:59:09Look
00:59:10You can produce the next one in full
00:59:13Yeah my dad's already on board
00:59:15Take that back and I'll kill you
00:59:19You're the producer
00:59:22Game face on
00:59:23Game face on
00:59:24Hooray for Hollywood
00:59:37When you hold the bloody lift
00:59:39Oh didn't I?
00:59:43Come on
00:59:44Come on
00:59:47Yes
00:59:48Oh God
01:00:08Are you not gonna change for the paparazzi shorts?
01:00:11It's not really my thing
01:00:13Besides Gabriel would wear something like this right?
01:00:16No I've got a bad feeling about this
01:00:18Listen son
01:00:18I've got this whole routine worked out
01:00:20No routine okay
01:00:22This isn't an audition
01:00:23Just say hello and then sign the pissing document
01:00:25Where's your wife?
01:00:28I think we should just come clean
01:00:29Ha ha ha ha
01:00:31Hello
01:00:31You must be the adjudicator
01:00:33My son Alan's been telling me all about ya
01:00:36Ha ha ha ha ha
01:00:38Sorry being a bit busy
01:00:39This film festival malarkey
01:00:41Kept me on me toes
01:00:43Yes, seems to have ramped up a notch
01:00:46With the screening of Gods of Shoreditch
01:00:48One of my personal favourites
01:00:51Um, now that you're here
01:00:55My paperwork needs a signature
01:00:58Absolutely
01:01:00Happy to
01:01:01Thank you
01:01:02Oh, sorry
01:01:07Forgot who I was there for a second
01:01:11Is that a what?
01:01:14I'll need a final signing off
01:01:17When the winners are announced
01:01:20Your accent seems off
01:01:24Uh
01:01:26It's
01:01:28It's
01:01:29Push voice
01:01:30A push telephone voice
01:01:33Yeah, I should use it all the time really
01:01:36Right
01:01:36Your honour
01:01:37May I show you to the next screening?
01:01:43Oh
01:01:45You know my movies
01:01:47Are inherently amazing
01:01:50It's all about the big screen
01:01:53And it's not easy being an action star
01:01:57Thank you
01:02:02Shouldn't you be up there
01:02:04Now that you're here?
01:02:06Yes
01:02:07Uh, absolutely
01:02:09He is such a star
01:02:11When it comes to these things
01:02:17Uh, ladies and gentlemen
01:02:18I'd like to
01:02:19Ahem
01:02:20Introduce to you
01:02:22Gods of Shoreditch
01:02:25And it stars
01:02:26Big round of applause
01:02:27For it stars
01:02:28Esme Presley
01:02:30And
01:02:31Doug Speedman
01:02:47Good entrance
01:02:48Good entrance
01:02:48You wanna see the one I'm gonna make when I, uh, win my award
01:02:54What?
01:02:55What?
01:02:55No!
01:02:55Get out!
01:02:58Crazy filmmakers trying to draw attention to their film
01:03:03I thought they were quite fun
01:03:08You know they do say I'm the new Robert Rodriguez
01:03:10Except I star in my own movies as well
01:03:13Maybe Robert was smarter
01:03:21You fought well
01:03:22Despite the twisted ankle
01:03:25You will live to fight another day
01:03:28And I assure you
01:03:29It is not serious
01:03:30I took the liberty of feeling the bone
01:03:33And it is perfectly sound
01:03:36Oh sir
01:03:37How will I ever thank you?
01:03:39Please
01:03:40Do not think of it
01:03:41It is my honour to serve you
01:03:45Will you not be seated?
01:03:47Pray
01:03:48Excuse me
01:03:49I do not wish to leave a watermark
01:03:54Permit me to call tomorrow afternoon
01:03:57So that I may inquire after you
01:04:04Fight hard
01:04:06Fight for me
01:04:07Fight for me
01:04:14Alan's, uh, pitching me some shitty book movie
01:04:18The God Particle's the third book in a series
01:04:22That guy
01:04:24The Irish Connection
01:04:25Masaka and fucking Chips
01:04:27Shit
01:04:29That director
01:04:30Is the worst
01:04:31He couldn't even direct traffic
01:04:33You know they should have come to
01:04:35Me
01:04:36Tug Speedman
01:04:39You know I'm right babe
01:04:54Fun and happiness in short supply?
01:04:57Out of the frying pan and into the fire
01:04:59It's always difficult when one person moves on
01:05:02Hmm
01:05:04Spoke to dad this morning
01:05:06He's recovering
01:05:07But no mention of my movie so
01:05:10Nice guys doing it for themselves
01:05:12Oh
01:05:15You're planning something that's going to get me in trouble aren't you?
01:05:19Oh most definitely
01:05:42You best move out of the way and let me be
01:05:44This is not how it works
01:05:47Nice time, stunt boy
01:05:48Oh, God.
01:06:19Alan?
01:06:23Thank you, everyone, for your kind words and praise.
01:06:26The buffet has been provided for yours truly.
01:06:29Fill your guts.
01:06:33You really don't have to do this.
01:06:35You know, they have a meal before their wards.
01:06:37These ain't for me.
01:06:54That went well.
01:06:55Thanks for that. What happened to the group?
01:06:58This is the best fun I've had all year.
01:07:06What's this?
01:07:08Naughty movies?
01:07:09Or my ransom demands?
01:07:14We have a late entry to the film festival.
01:07:18And I wanted you to experience it in my full company.
01:07:27Late entries are highly irregular.
01:07:36But this could be a lot of fun.
01:07:40Well, this is it.
01:07:42This is where I or Mike is staying the night.
01:07:47Because I did have three iron bathtubs.
01:07:49They were all tied together.
01:07:51And it was really, really, really good.
01:07:55I don't know what you want me to say.
01:07:58Mike's was the best film.
01:07:59I have no patience with best.
01:08:01I have no patience with fairness.
01:08:04Life is not fair.
01:08:05Love is not fair.
01:08:07And as long as we still breathe the air of a free capitalist society.
01:08:13Business will never be fair.
01:08:18Sacrifice, Alan.
01:08:20Like the kamikaze pilots used to do.
01:08:23Yeah, that's a discomforting stay, isn't it?
01:08:25Emorrhoids cause discomfort.
01:08:28This is open heart surgery.
01:08:36Fuck the phone, Alan.
01:08:38You said I could produce.
01:08:40I will knock you the fuck out right here.
01:08:43Right now.
01:08:44We did the right thing.
01:08:47Are you okay?
01:08:51Movie stars do not have opinions.
01:08:56Sorry, I know you're his dad.
01:08:58But Alan worked damn hard throughout this festival.
01:09:01And I suppose the bros code is over now, you fucking tugs wife.
01:09:05I think I'm done here.
01:09:09We're bloody ruins.
01:09:22Ah, Alan!
01:09:24You know what I'm gonna say.
01:09:25Yes, I know.
01:09:25You're ending.
01:09:26But I'm not being funny.
01:09:27The only thing I care about ending is this festival.
01:09:29Eyes front.
01:09:31God, does making movies have to be all this difficult?
01:09:34I'm looking forward to this.
01:09:35Who's doing your presentation?
01:09:37Hope is a surprise.
01:09:38Oh, me too.
01:09:39If she shows up.
01:09:41Hmm?
01:09:42Hmm.
01:09:43I do love surprises.
01:09:45I do love surprises.
01:09:45Yeah.
01:09:45Yeah.
01:09:45Ooh.
01:09:57Ladies and gentlemen.
01:09:58Please put your hands together for our wonderful guest speaker Caroline Doherty.
01:10:08so very glad to be here this evening amongst all the wonderful filmmakers and stars
01:10:15to be a filmmaker you have to be psychotic in your desire to do something for the first category
01:10:23best actress in a feature film millie ward
01:10:33esme presley in gods of shoreditch
01:10:39and fran walsh in the hey mister dj
01:10:45and the winner is this is just a start esme presley
01:10:55so very well done i would like to show my immense gratitude to all of the team involved in gods
01:11:09and for our first best picture nominee we have hey mr dj
01:11:15you didn't think to thank me the man who made it all happen
01:11:18a film about a time in the 90s where djs were gods and gangsters ruled the streets
01:11:24your ego will be stroked enough tonight
01:11:27let's have a look
01:11:34what'd you throw there
01:11:36just uh just some bags i was storing stuff in
01:11:41right get yourself freshened up got a great place for us to go to
01:11:43ask her i'm not feeling up to it
01:11:45hey you're single now remember half an hour off
01:11:50and the next category is best newcomer nominees
01:11:55lynn chang for opera in the evening garden
01:11:58millie ward for malicious intent
01:12:01and jess bronski
01:12:04and the winner is
01:12:08millie ward in malicious intent
01:12:17oh my god i don't even know what to say
01:12:19um thank you so much to the festival
01:12:22thank you so much to everyone that i've met
01:12:25and if you would like to come
01:12:27for drinks afterwards
01:12:29then uh meet me at 7th
01:12:31she knows how proud i am of her dunya
01:12:34hey i was nervous
01:12:35and i got one
01:12:37i mean
01:12:38it looks like roughly the right shape
01:12:40i mean it's gonna save me a ton of berries
01:12:43and our next best film nominee is for malicious intent
01:13:04and the next category is best editing nominees
01:13:09we have emmett bronski in mysterious
01:13:13target speedman for gods of shoreditch
01:13:16george cheng for opera in the evening garden
01:13:21and the winner is
01:13:23well this is a vindication considering no one saw the ending
01:13:27and our third best film nominee is gods of shoreditch
01:13:32a story about time traveling gangsters
01:13:35by night one way by day another this shall be the norm
01:13:40until you take true love's first kiss
01:13:43and love takes its true form
01:13:50and a rather exciting category best actor nominees
01:13:58we have george cheng in opera and evening garden
01:14:05ashrath ward in malicious intent
01:14:09tug speedman in gods of shoreditch
01:14:13and the winner is tug speedman
01:14:20gutted mate
01:14:21proper gutted
01:14:23honestly thought i was in with a shout
01:14:27me too
01:14:28i was the best actor
01:14:30and our fourth best film nominee
01:14:34i didn't know nothing about no fourth nomination
01:14:36is a work of modern day art
01:14:39versus immense need
01:14:41now let's have a look at
01:14:43to homelessness and the man by mike reed
01:14:45so there's certain things that you would do
01:14:48well certain things you look for
01:14:49like shopping center
01:14:50pounds on the tris
01:14:52that's a point like
01:14:53points like
01:14:57200 point
01:14:58and we're down to the final award of the evening
01:15:01best overall film of the festival
01:15:04and the winner is
01:15:07hardly a win if you paid for it
01:15:11mike reed
01:15:24well it looks like
01:15:26you might just want best film to
01:15:28thanks and everything
01:15:31the beds are really comfortable
01:15:38this isn't right
01:15:40this fucking film wasn't even in the program
01:15:43what the hell even is this fucking shit film
01:15:45my daddy paid for all of this
01:15:48what are you talking about
01:15:50this was all paid for
01:15:52no not him
01:15:53that's just a shit actor
01:15:55this is outrageous
01:15:57i knew something was wrong
01:16:01okay
01:16:02i thought he was pretty convincing
01:16:04you've falsified records
01:16:07there may well be charges
01:16:09what charges
01:16:10no no please
01:16:11all right look i'm sorry
01:16:12this whole thing was my fault
01:16:14don't punish or charge anyone else
01:16:16my dad
01:16:17gabriel
01:16:18guy from the phone
01:16:19had a massive heart attack
01:16:21and he had so much money invested in this festival
01:16:23and his tug speed man telling the truth
01:16:27technically yes
01:16:28most of it was his money
01:16:29his father's money
01:16:31yes but
01:16:32we went with our hearts
01:16:33and that's why
01:16:34mike won best film
01:16:35i don't judge the films
01:16:38merely here to make sure
01:16:39that the festival is run properly
01:16:41from what you're telling me
01:16:42this has been
01:16:43an absolute farce
01:16:52mr adjudicator
01:16:54excuse me for interrupting
01:16:56i have known esme
01:16:57a long time
01:16:59and
01:17:00well if my word has any bearing
01:17:03esme
01:17:04she always speaks from her heart
01:17:07ms warren
01:17:11ms warren
01:17:13ms warren
01:17:16ms warren
01:17:16ms warren
01:17:18i am a huge fan of your movies
01:17:21and your words do carry
01:17:25significant weight
01:17:27but this is
01:17:28an official matter
01:17:30i fully understand that
01:17:34but
01:17:35if esme says that
01:17:37homeless man is the best film
01:17:41i would not disagree
01:17:44thank you rachel
01:17:46you're welcome
01:18:12producers
01:18:15is this jacket okay
01:18:16it feels a bit big
01:18:21sometimes he's got to take the chances
01:18:24do you regret taking a chance on me
01:18:26who am i to argue with the producer
01:18:32do you miss tug
01:18:35wherever he is and whatever he's doing
01:18:37let's just hope he's not missing us
01:18:51total submission bitches
01:18:54is this gonna hurt
01:18:56true love is pain
01:19:29it feels a good or bad
01:19:39you can hold up
01:19:39watching
01:19:39okay
01:19:39we
01:19:54Turn over and action.
01:20:02I'm not playing a street walker.
01:20:05It's a tart with a heart.
01:20:06We'll do a second-rate street walker wearing an outfit like this.
01:20:09I'm first class, one best newcomer.
01:20:11Just do it, Harry's Griton, please, babe.
01:20:16Idiot.
01:20:19So you know the saying, never work with children or animals.
01:20:24Loves me really.
01:20:26What about you?
01:20:44¶¶
01:20:45¶¶
01:20:56¶¶
01:21:01In yaya, light yow, miyamidu.
01:21:44Some beautiful paths can't be discovered without getting lost.
01:21:50I never did thank you, did I?
01:21:56Emmett!
01:22:01I've got something for you.
01:22:02Oh God, please do not kidnap me now.
01:22:05You'll like this.
01:22:10Oh please, he did it to himself when we went back on his word.
01:22:15You're welcome.
01:22:18Why did you just not leave us alone?
01:22:21We told you time and time again, but you still don't listen, do you sister?
01:22:30Oh, okay.
01:22:32Oh, okay.
01:22:34Oh, okay.
01:22:35Oh, okay.
01:22:36Oh, okay.
01:22:37Oh, okay.
01:22:38Oh, okay.
01:22:40Oh, okay.
01:22:41Oh, okay.
01:22:42Oh, okay.
01:22:43Oh, okay.
01:22:45Oh, okay.
01:22:46You
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