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The.Madison.S01E05 [Full Movie] [Latest Version]Full EP - Full
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00:05You
00:06Previously on the Madison
00:10He wanted to be buried here. There's a spot marked on a map. I know this spot. I
00:16Can't remember his face
00:17If I were you I wouldn't listen
00:20like
00:22Jesus
00:24Right
00:30I'm going to die
00:33As much as I like sitting here it hurts more than you'll ever know
00:36Just like you're wondering how I feel about you feel enough to sit here and take it
00:40Abby if I were you I would set my hooks pretty deep in that one. They're not making any more
00:46men like him
00:52I wonder if you know how happiness would make him
00:57It would fill his heart
01:00Tomorrow we bury them
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04:52Not the same, though, as a real hug.
04:55No, it's not the same.
05:19Right here, huh?
05:21She marked it on a map.
05:23All right.
05:24Well, we ain't getting a backhoe down here.
05:27Might be able to get a tractor up from the river,
05:29but not sure what good that'll do us.
05:32No, these holes are getting dug the old Irish way.
05:36Yep.
05:38How the hell are we going to get the caskets here?
05:41Swinston still feed off a wagon, don't they?
05:43That's a good idea.
05:46You want to call or run for shovels?
05:48Nah, you call, I'll run.
05:50My gelding's just going to follow you.
05:53Yank off that bridle.
05:55Yeah.
06:15I am aware.
06:18Yes, I am aware.
06:20We have had a death in the family.
06:23I'm pretty sure the world of girls' volleyball will survive the week without her.
06:27Yes, you are correct.
06:29I am not factored in how this affects anyone else, even a little.
06:33Fucking school.
06:35Is this going to be okay?
06:38This is going to have to do, honey.
06:39It's all you got.
06:41Hey.
06:45It's just us.
06:47Okay?
06:47There's nobody to be offended.
06:49What did school say?
06:51You're missing a volleyball tournament.
06:53It's okay.
06:55It's okay.
06:57Hey.
06:59Hey.
07:02It's okay.
07:28Where'd you find cream?
07:30Same shopping center where I found the dress.
07:33I gotta say, Bozeman impressed me.
07:36I wasn't expecting to find Donna Karan in the mountains.
07:39Found a little something for you, too.
07:41Yeah.
07:42Preston would prefer me in jeans.
07:44I think he would find a certain victory in that.
07:49He deserves a little black dress, and that's exactly what I got you.
07:52Did the boys say when they would be ready?
07:54They said to walk over at noon.
07:56How are they going to get them out there?
07:58I didn't ask, and they didn't say.
08:01They just said it was handled.
08:05About two hours, Preston wrote a chapter on telling time from the son's position.
08:13It's alarmingly accurate.
08:18The girls asked me to arrange a plane.
08:23When?
08:24Tonight.
08:25Oh.
08:27Okay.
08:27They need closure, honey.
08:29They won't get it here.
08:31They have lives, and they need to go live them.
08:34I would very much like to plan a memorial service.
08:37He has a lot of friends that deserve a way to say goodbye.
08:40Does he?
08:40He does.
08:42And you know that.
08:44We could do it at the Explorers Club.
08:46Okay.
08:46Just have at the apartment.
08:49Have Corbon.
08:52Cater.
08:53They love that place.
08:55I already called.
08:56You find back, too.
09:02I have a very worried husband.
09:04He's convinced some distant cousin of the Unabomber is going to abduct me and hold me in his basement for
09:09ransom.
09:11Depending on the cousin, I'm not completely opposed.
09:14Of course, that's my warped romance novel version of abduction.
09:17I doubt that's how it would play out, Lily.
09:19That is how it would play out in my mind after two Percocets.
09:23You think I'm joking.
09:25No.
09:31I love you.
09:37There is nowhere I would rather be than with you when you need me.
09:41I know.
09:46I have a little bottle of Kahlua if you would like some blood in that coffee.
09:49Oh.
09:49Well, now you're talking.
10:13I'll give you some more.
10:16Have a breath.
10:17Okay.
10:46I'll give you some more.
11:04Of course, you pack the perfect dress.
11:13Is there some little black dress tree by the river that I am unaware of?
11:20Okay, girls.
11:24And Russell.
11:25I know.
12:06Where are they?
12:08Uh, Carmen.
12:12Sorry.
12:15Sorry, Miss.
12:18Sorry, Miss.
12:19No, it's fine.
12:27I'm sorry, Erin.
12:28You'll never know.
12:32Come on.
12:33Oh, my God.
13:10Okay, boy.
13:32Oh, my God.
14:02Oh, my God.
14:21Mrs. Glabber, I'm very sorry for your loss.
14:24Mrs. Glabber, I'm very sorry for your loss.
14:55Well, this is far from my first rodeo.
14:58Do you mind if I say something first and then give you all a chance to speak?
15:03I don't think my group has many speeches in them.
15:08Do you mind a prayer?
15:11I do not.
15:22Lord, we stand before you with heavy hearts.
15:25With the glory of love comes the pain of loss, and we look to you for comfort.
15:32Remind us that it is a selfish pain because you have promised a place called heaven where
15:38our departed bask in the glow of your grace.
15:42They are no longer men.
15:44They are angels who guide us through darkness, lift us when we are weak, and nourish our souls
15:52and spirits.
15:54Our pain is a selfish pain because we do not know this place heaven.
15:59We lean on our faith that it exists and on your mercy that it holds a place for us where
16:08we may sit
16:09in your light beside our loved ones and know only joy forever.
16:17I'm in.
16:20If anyone would like a word.
16:24Stacy, it's not the first time you've given that speech.
16:28No, ma'am.
16:30It's a good one.
16:33Do you care to say something?
16:37I have plenty to say, but I won't be saying it today.
16:49I guess that's it then.
16:53Um.
16:56So, what happens now?
16:58We'll take care of everything.
17:05Wait, that's it?
17:05That's it?
17:06That's it?
17:07If he has nothing to say, then say it, Paige.
17:09I don't know what to say.
17:11What are you supposed to say?
17:12I think that's our point.
17:18Which one's Paul?
17:29God damn you for taking it from us.
17:44I love you.
17:47I love you.
17:51I love you.
18:01Everyone deals with it different, don't they, boys?
18:05I don't think they're dealing with it at all.
18:08Not yet, anyway.
18:11Who can blame them?
18:27I love you.
18:30You're a lot.
18:31I love you.
18:33You're a great dog.
18:34This is it?
19:12Pretty sneaky, trying to have a funeral and not tell anybody?
19:15Oh, I, I, I didn't know anyone would care.
19:20We let you have the funeral.
19:22We will not be denied our feast.
19:27When they decided to build these cabins, they wanted to do it all themselves.
19:31Mill the wood, frame it, roughing the electric, the whole deal.
19:36Look at the bottom of them there.
19:37They're sitting on railroad ties.
19:39And I could not figure out what in the hell purpose that would serve.
19:42And I told them they're going to be colder than the devil in winter.
19:45And every skunk and raccoon and God knows what else is going to set up shop underneath them.
19:50Well, Preston just looked at me and nodded.
19:52Didn't say a word.
19:54About six months later, tax assessor comes by my place and says, have you seen these cabins they built next
19:59door?
20:00I said, I had.
20:01And he asked me if I'd ever seen them move.
20:04I said, move.
20:05What do you, what do you mean move?
20:07Tax assessor says, when he tried to put a value on them, your husband said they was mobile homes.
20:14You pick them up with a forklift and move them and asked me if I'd ever seen them be mobile.
20:19Well, I told them, yeah, they haul them all over the place.
20:23And if you look at the back of that outhouse, your husband nailed tires from a shopping cart and said
20:29that son of a bitch was mobile too.
20:32He did not want to pay any taxes.
20:35I wondered what those were for.
20:36Preston always had issues with authority.
20:39Wheels on outhouse.
20:40Never seen anything like it.
20:45Indian tacos.
20:46Good stuff.
20:48Want some?
20:50How about some of those cookies?
20:52Oh, good choice.
20:54I was thinking like three.
20:58What's your mom going to say about that?
21:00My mom's not going to say anything because she's not going to see me eat them.
21:03Let's keep this between us.
21:06I think that's a good idea.
21:20Thank you for today.
21:22It means more than you know.
21:24Someone had to do it for me.
21:25I know what it means.
21:28I'm sorry it had to be done.
21:32We're flying out tonight.
21:33Girls have missed enough school and I have exhausted my wardrobe.
21:41But I'd like to come back.
21:44Or dare I invite you to New York?
21:48Well, the only way you get me to New York is if it seceded from the Union and I was
21:52drafted
21:52into the Army to take it back.
21:54Okay.
21:54You got to go a little easier on my city, buddy.
21:57I'm not knocking it.
21:58I'm just not going there.
22:00Fair enough.
22:02Then I'll come visit.
22:05Sure.
22:06I mean it.
22:10Okay.
22:13I mean it.
22:20I'm a sheriff's deputy who makes $52,000 a year.
22:23I have $12,000 in the bank and I'm about to spend six of it on a pretty average rope
22:28horse.
22:29Three nights a week.
22:30I'm going to load him in a trailer and drag him all over Montana trying to win back what
22:33I spent on him in October.
22:35I'm going to take my boys in the mountains for a month and fill our freezer with elk.
22:39I ain't never land on no beach.
22:40I'm never going to Europe or San Francisco or any city bigger than Billings.
22:46Ever.
22:48What part of that sounds good to you?
22:50None of it.
22:51Now walk me through your life.
22:53What won't you change?
22:54I don't have those kind of absolutes.
22:55Just walk me through it.
23:00Macy has gymnastics every morning.
23:03From there I go to Pilates.
23:06From Pilates I go to my therapist.
23:08From my therapist I go to coffee with my girlfriends to talk about all the bullshit advice my therapist
23:11gave me.
23:12Then I pick up Macy and I get Bridget and we go to ballet.
23:15We have recitals every Friday night.
23:17Saturday morning we have competitions.
23:19I take the girls the same parts for Christmas.
23:21Italy for the month of July which you would love.
23:24I will point out.
23:30Who feeds the horses?
23:33Isn't there a service for that?
23:35You have to do it every day?
23:38Okay.
23:39Okay.
23:40There is no future in this but
23:41you are tall and kind
23:43and fucking beautiful.
23:46You are tall and kind and beautiful.
23:48Okay.
23:48So can we just agree
23:48to fuck this up together
23:50and have as much sex as possible
23:53until
23:54until we can?
23:55Yeah.
23:55You city girls do spell it out, don't you?
23:57Yeah.
23:58We get to the point.
23:59Yep.
24:00We do.
24:00You go from wondering when we're going to see each other
24:02to wondering when you're going to leave.
24:06I think I'd rather just miss you.
24:10I'm not gone yet.
24:11You know what I mean.
24:13So is this goodbye?
24:17I think it's best.
24:18Oh wow.
24:22Let me just clarify
24:25that you are breaking up with me
24:26at my father's funeral.
24:28No, we aren't together to break up.
24:30No, no, no.
24:30We seemed pretty together yesterday
24:31when you were lying on top of me.
24:33Don't fucking abby me now.
24:35You want to miss me?
24:36Is that what you want?
24:38Here's your fucking chance.
25:09It's time to go home, isn't it?
25:13Spend time, honey.
25:14ENT sugar
25:31And I'm sorry.
25:31Fuck!
25:34Forget about you here.
25:34It's time to hear all of you.
25:34Baby.
25:34We can't wait late now.
25:35You've gotta wait late now.
25:43You're the yelled and surprise me.
25:44Now I'm sorry, is this hard to be your story?
25:49when did your father die russell
25:53um it'll be uh six years in april where is he buried uh my mother had him cremated
25:59you know the plan was to spread his ashes at our place in montauk but
26:06he never did it i don't know why so he's sitting in a jar on our mantle which is an
26:12odd custom
26:16putting ashes in a jar above a fireplace full of ashes what do you miss most about him
26:27he used to call me every monday and uh tell me a joke really
26:34you still remember them oh yeah tell me one oh no no no yeah they um
26:40yeah my father had a uh rather warped sense of humor
26:44yeah well at this point i'm pretty hard to offend
26:52okay
26:53um
26:57okay so there are four nuns driving in a van and the van goes off a cliff and they all
27:02die
27:03funny no no no that's i'm getting sorry this is all just a setup yeah i got i got it
27:08yeah okay
27:09so they're standing at the pearly gates and saint peter looks them over and he says to the first nun
27:14this is your last chance to confess before you enter the gates of heaven
27:19and your conscience must be cleansed before you enter so the first nun thinks about it and she says
27:24well i used to sneak peeks at father riley in the shower saint peter says well you're a naughty one
27:31sister wash your eyes in this bowl of holy water and say five hail mary she does sends her out
27:37to
27:38heaven so he looks at the second nun asks her the same thing she says well on occasion i would
27:43stroke
27:44father riley's member with my hand saint peter just shakes his head tells her to wash her hand in the
27:50bowl of holy water say ten hail mary's so she does lets her into heaven now the third nun steps
27:57up
27:57but the fourth nun grabs her throws her to the ground and steps up to the bowl of holy water
28:02saint peter says what on earth are you doing sister and the nun says i'm gonna wash my mouth out
28:07in this
28:07bowl before that bitch puts her ass in it
28:14i stand corrected russell i can still be offended
28:19i was very poorly chosen i'm sorry it was the first one that came to my mind i am so
28:22sorry i
28:24it's terrible common denominator where their problem seems to be father riley yeah he uh did get around
28:32ah what's in it vodka soda easy on the soda god bless you the meeting's stuffing at the gym at
28:40nine
28:41if you're up for it oh yeah exercise it's exactly what i need
28:49i see things didn't end well with a cowboy
28:54how's that look about it
28:58page has been quiet i think this is going to be hardest on her
29:03i'm afraid
29:05how so
29:06when you've dedicated your entire life
29:08to gaining the attention of one person
29:13what is your purpose when that person is gone
29:16the girls are handling it well at least
29:18yeah well they're too young to know the difference
29:21just one less present at christmas
29:27i know an excellent therapist stacy
29:31you're my therapist
29:34you're my best friend
29:36i'm incapable of being impartial
29:38speaking to someone who can look at the situation with clarity
29:42and with zero opinion
29:43what i need is opinion
29:46if i want to know what the book on death says i'll buy the fucking book
29:49but that's why i think
30:19I don't know.
30:50I don't know.
31:28I don't know.
31:36I don't know.
32:06You are.
32:08You have the same look on your face pulling out those nasty boots as an 11-year-old pulling
32:12out his baseball cleats.
32:14It's the same look you get when Gucci has a sale.
32:16That's different.
32:18That's me saving you money.
32:19You know, this is proof of the genetic distinction between men and women.
32:24Tell me, oh love of my life, all the ways how when you buy something on sale, it saves me
32:31money.
32:31I'm gonna buy the damn thing no matter what.
32:33Waiting for the sale is how much I love you.
32:38That almost makes sense.
32:39Makes perfect sense once you accept the inevitability of the purchase.
32:47Why do you do that?
32:50What?
32:52It's your little mountain mistress, the jealous type.
32:57You wanna know?
32:58I do wanna know.
33:00I really wanna know.
33:02Because I lost it once.
33:04Fell off in the river.
33:05I spent two days looking for it and I'm not going through that shit again.
33:08So if I put it right there, I can't lose it.
33:13Panicked, were you?
33:16Terrified.
33:17It's nice to see I still have that effect.
33:20Oh boy, do you ever, baby.
33:39That was something I can drink.
33:42But I'm going through that.
33:43I'll take it right now.
33:43No.
34:08I'm going through that.
34:08I've was my daughter.
34:14Oh, Madison Avenue.
34:17How did they get the name, do you think?
34:22I always assumed James Madison.
34:24Oh.
34:24The president.
34:25Yeah.
34:26Of course, that would make sense.
34:27Yeah.
34:30I suppose they named the Madison River after him as well.
34:34Where's the Madison River?
34:36Montana.
34:39Where your husband spent time?
34:42Mm-hmm.
34:46Is that where he died?
34:48No.
34:49He died on another river.
34:50Actually, no.
34:52He died on a mountain.
34:55No.
34:55No river involved at all.
35:03How do you feel when you tell me that?
35:06How do you think I feel?
35:08I don't presume to know.
35:10That's why I asked.
35:11Isn't that your job?
35:14Like, tell me how I feel.
35:17My job is to help you understand how you feel.
35:20Hmm.
35:22More so, my job is to help you understand the behaviors that those feelings elicit.
35:29Hmm.
35:33And how would you describe my present behavior?
35:39Hostile.
35:42Hostile?
35:43Mistrusting.
35:45Which I understand.
35:48You don't know me.
35:50You don't know me.
35:51And yet here you are, in theory, willing to expose your most personal thoughts and intimate feelings.
36:01Trust me in my interpretation of those feelings and behaviors to guide your decision-making in the future.
36:11My decision-making.
36:13What decisions are we questioning?
36:15I'm not questioning anything.
36:17No, you are the one who said it.
36:18My husband died.
36:20The love of my life.
36:22The father of my children.
36:24My center, my soul, is gone.
36:29If you, by chance, have happened upon any information that might assist me in mitigating the desire to claw my
36:38eyes out with a fucking spoon to get rid of the pain, I sure would appreciate that.
36:46But I do not need you staring at me like I'm some bored housewife trying to justify her affair with
36:52her fucking tennis coach.
36:54I know those women.
36:55Plenty of them.
36:56I am not one of them.
37:01I am hurting.
37:03And I would like some help with that.
37:08If you can.
37:09If you can't,
37:13then I'll leave early.
37:15And you can keep the fucking change.
37:25You care for a drink?
37:29I would love one.
37:38Don't normally do this.
37:40Spend most of my time convincing my clients not to self-medicate.
37:47Don't mind whiskey?
37:48I don't give a shit what it is.
37:50I don't give a shit what it is.
38:15Not this.
38:17A lot of talking.
38:19A lot of talking.
38:20And yelling and crying.
38:21A lot of it.
38:22A lot of it.
38:23And often.
38:25And in time.
38:26And in time.
38:28Those memories will become fond again.
38:31They won't hurt to recall them.
38:34And you'll laugh.
38:38And you'll laugh.
38:41Will you love again?
38:43Maybe.
38:45I don't have any idea if that's something you want.
38:50Will you ever be whole again?
38:52Will you feel like you did before you died?
38:58No.
39:00But you know that.
39:03But you will heal if you let yourself.
39:07You will have as much life to live as you allow yourself.
39:15Or you'll have none.
39:20You'll have no life.
39:25Does that make sense?
39:30Yeah.
39:32Okay.
39:38Why don't you finish your drink and let me have it?
39:42Seriously.
39:43Come on.
39:43Give it your best shot.
39:50You're a terrible therapist.
39:52You know that.
39:53With that smug fucking sweater.
39:58You really like saying fuck, don't you?
40:00I know.
40:02I find it quite liberating at the moment.
40:08Good.
40:09Say it again.
40:11Fuck you.
40:12Are we going to do trust falls next, you fucking quack?
40:17It's a really good place to start.
40:19Come on.
40:19Keep it coming.
40:20Let's go.
40:21I'm serious.
40:27I'm thinking about it.
40:29I'm considering it.
40:32I know.
40:33I know.
40:33I know.
40:34I'm running away.
40:35Running away from my problems.
40:37This problem goes with me.
40:39So I'm not running from anything.
40:43Would I miss my daughters?
40:45Honestly, I don't.
40:48I don't know.
40:49And part of me thinks it would be better for them.
40:52You know.
40:52Live their own lives.
40:54Maybe they could move with you.
40:57I mean, it doesn't sound like either of them are bound to the city.
41:00That's what I said.
41:01My oldest daughter needs it.
41:03I actually threatened to cut her off if she didn't.
41:08That's not very nice.
41:10Oh, what do they teach sarcasm in therapy school these days?
41:16Well, if by therapy school you mean Dartmouth, then yeah, they kind of invented it there.
41:26Do you think I should?
41:30Not my place to say, but I think you should consider it, and I'll tell you why.
41:39Because you are actively weighing your future, and the consequences are your choices in that future, and that's healthy, that's
41:45good for your soul.
41:46So whether you actually do it is irrelevant, but you should seriously consider it.
41:52You should consider moving to Europe.
41:56Spend a year traveling.
41:57You've got the financial means.
41:59No responsibilities here preventing it.
42:01You should consider everything.
42:06Wish I could have met him.
42:08Must have been a hell of a man.
42:10Because you are a hell of a woman.
42:12You know who you are, and you're not ashamed of it.
42:14And this, yelling and crying and pondering.
42:18This is what you're supposed to be doing.
42:20This is grieving.
42:22This is accepting an immeasurable loss in your life, and racking your brain to try to find a way to
42:27survive it.
42:30And you will.
42:35Thank you, Phil.
42:38Oh, this has been pleasantly cathartic.
42:43I took one look at that sweater, and I had very little faith in you, but you, you overcame it.
42:50Turns out, you don't suck at your job.
42:53Well, that is wildly offensive. Thank you.
42:59Same time tomorrow.
43:00I'm thinking afternoon.
43:02I still got five clients, and I'm pretty drunk.
43:05I think you are a client to end the day with, not begin one.
43:08Fine.
43:09See you at happy hour.
43:20Good night.
43:22You all right.
43:23See you at Hannah.
43:32Let's go.
43:35Hello.
43:35Okay, I'll see you at that next time.
43:37Okay, so far.
43:37Okay, so far, I'll see you can at night.
43:38I'll see you at a time.
43:41who's your realtor yeah no matter what I do I can't stay here Lily I can smell
43:47him hold on hold on is everything okay so um pages is is in bed and she won't
43:58talk and she can't stop crying and she's well she's hyperventilating and I feel
44:02like I should call an ambulance but I don't like I feel like that might make
44:06her worse you're right you're right it would I'll be there in 15 minutes call
44:09Abby okay okay calling her name
44:39is she in the bedroom yeah
44:45uh do you have any sweets sweets okay get some ice cream rocky road and buy some chocolate chips
44:53put three scoops in a glass of milk put the chocolate chips on top and
44:57and then just bring it to me with a spoon that sounds uh disgusting to start I wasn't asking
45:02your opinion of it Russell
45:09I got rocky road desperate times call for desperate measures grab chocolate chips the shitty ones like she
45:15likes well looks like all we need from you is a cup Russell give it to her she knows how
45:20to make it
45:21got it okay
45:25hey hey hey hey hey hey it's okay it's okay it's okay it's okay it's okay it's okay it's okay
45:30you know what this is
45:32this is how much you love them and your body just doesn't know where to put all that love now
45:37okay but you don't have to put it anywhere and you don't have to stop loving someone when they're
45:41gardening in fact one could argue that you should love them more and here's a sad fact of life
45:51you will feel this way again yeah when I die when your husband dies and your friends and
45:58and someday your children will feel this way about you
46:03thanks mom I feel so much better
46:06I come bearing gifts
46:08I'm not hungry
46:09it's not food
46:10it is a drug
46:12it is sugar and chocolate in a mixture that only your metabolism can process in a way that doesn't end
46:17up on your hips
46:18and I hate you for it
46:23I used to eat this when I was like five
46:25no you still act five so
46:31fuck you and your bad roots
46:33no she's back
46:34I don't understand it
46:37it's the crunch
46:39with the cold
46:39and the mushy of the ice cream
46:41the explanation
46:44doesn't sell it
46:45page
46:45well
46:47you got her
46:49I got her but I cannot stay the night
46:50I can stay the night
47:00this is my favorite thing ever
47:04I know
47:17is she okay
47:20she will be
47:24is there a decent bar
47:26near here
47:28there's a
47:29there's a dive bar
47:31around the corner
47:32well
47:34Soho's version of a dive bar
47:37hmm
47:38hmm
47:51what's this place called
47:53um
47:54I don't know
47:55I'm not sure it has a name
48:10what's the name of this place
48:12name
48:13uh
48:14people just call it the bar
48:15or the bar down the street
48:17something like that
48:17no name
48:18not that I'm aware of
48:19no
48:20what does your paycheck say
48:21uh
48:23XT Enterprises LLC
48:25or some shit
48:28okay
48:29so
48:30bar just
48:32doesn't have a name
48:33no name
48:33what can I get you
48:34oh god
48:35I'm uh
48:36I am not in the mood
48:38to make any decisions
48:38hmm
48:40martini
48:41oh that is a cocktail
48:42and this is the furthest place
48:44from a cocktail bar
48:45so
48:45true that
48:46um
48:46how about an Irish car bomb
48:48I have no idea what that is
48:50trust me
48:51okay
48:52what about you
48:53what kind of amber ales do you
48:55that'll be two Irish car bombs
48:56yeah like your style
48:57two Irish car bombs
48:58I have to work in the morning
49:00it's one drink
49:01Russell
49:07oh I didn't see that coming
49:09oh gosh
49:10apologies
49:12Russell
49:14this is gonna hurt
49:19great
49:21you gotta
49:22yeah
49:23yeah
49:32it went down the wrong pipe
49:35I have a
49:36bad gag reflex
49:38no no
49:39I'm not
49:39I'm
49:40I'm not laughing at that
49:41what then
49:44oh
49:44life
49:47uh
49:47choices people make
49:49don't get me wrong
49:51she made a good one with you
49:55what are your dreams
49:59dreams
50:00or
50:00you know
50:01aspirations
50:03might be a better word
50:04for your life
50:06for
50:07my daughter
50:08I mean
50:09what
50:09uh
50:09you know
50:09we just got the townhouse
50:11so
50:12that's a purchase
50:13not a dream
50:16have you two
50:19talked about
50:19starting a family
50:21no page
50:23she just got down
50:23to a size zero
50:24and she worked really hard
50:25for it
50:26Russell
50:26Russell
50:26independent thoughts
50:27do you have any
50:31yeah
50:32I mean I guess
50:32I want
50:32I want to have kids
50:34mm-hmm
50:35okay
50:35I don't want to raise them
50:36and I want to
50:38I want to move out of town
50:39you know
50:40where they can have a normal
50:41you know
50:42trick-or-treat
50:43and
50:43and
50:43and
50:44play baseball
50:45and run out on the street
50:46you know
50:47no I don't know
50:48no I don't know
50:49I raised mine here
50:52well that would be my dream
50:55what about when they're grown
50:58what's the dream then
50:59I don't know
51:01I don't know
51:02I haven't gotten that far
51:03yeah
51:03well
51:04then you need a new dream
51:08honestly
51:08I always thought of you
51:09and Creston as the dream
51:15so did I
51:15Russell
51:20but that dream is over
51:24well I guess we both need a new one
51:29yeah
52:02but that dream is over
52:03there isn't over
52:03I don't know
52:03so does it
52:03you know
52:08you know
52:09understand
52:09he
52:12I
52:12have
52:15had
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