- 10 hours ago
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00:00:05Well, it looks like we'll have to bung the advert in for another week, Miss Kilding.
00:00:10I can't understand it, Mr. Handy. Not a single reply.
00:00:15And we're supposed to open for business today.
00:00:18I'll just have to postpone.
00:00:20When you open a gaff, an enterprise like this, you have got to employ people with no-how, flexibility.
00:00:25People who are ready to undertake anything for anybody.
00:00:27That's the whole idea behind helping hands.
00:00:30Never mind, Mr. Handy, dear. I'm sure you'll get staffed.
00:00:35Eh? Oh, staffed.
00:00:51Morning.
00:00:52Morning.
00:00:53Oh. Nothing interesting?
00:00:55Well, if there was, I'll be after it myself.
00:00:57I say, are you looking for a job, Mr. Twist?
00:01:00And why should I not, Mr. Infield Hoppin?
00:01:03I'm not a fixture here, you know.
00:01:05They didn't build a place around me, you know.
00:01:08A Ministry of Labour clerk can get fed up with his job like ordinary people, you know.
00:01:12Watch out, Mr. Infield Hoppin. Watch out, Mr. Twist.
00:01:14What have you got today?
00:01:15Oh, there's nothing, Mr. Weston.
00:01:17Honestly, it's hardly worth my friend's petrol to bring me here each day.
00:01:22Ah, bonjour, guten tag, bonjour, no, shalom aleichem.
00:01:27Hi.
00:01:28I'm saying good morning.
00:01:29Just demonstrating four of the 16 languages I speak fluently.
00:01:33For your benefit, Mr. Twist, there must, must, must be a worthwhile appointment for me today.
00:01:39Please say there is.
00:01:40Please say there is.
00:01:42Mr. Courtney?
00:01:43Yes.
00:01:44There isn't.
00:01:46Do you mind?
00:01:47Do you mind?
00:01:48Oh, charming.
00:01:49You're in a nice mood, aren't you?
00:01:51Oh, I'm sorry, but I'm absolutely fed up.
00:01:53So am I.
00:01:54I'm looking for an interesting job.
00:01:56Me too.
00:01:57There just aren't any exciting jobs for women.
00:02:00You're so right.
00:02:01It's a man's world.
00:02:02Yes, well, it's about time somebody did something about it.
00:02:05I agree.
00:02:06Come on.
00:02:07No, no, we can't go in there.
00:02:10Here, here, here.
00:02:11You can't come in here.
00:02:12Why not?
00:02:12I can do a man's job, and I will too, if it's interesting enough.
00:02:15Me too.
00:02:16What have you got?
00:02:17Nothing.
00:02:19Hello, hello.
00:02:20Isn't it a lovely morning?
00:02:21Anything on the cards?
00:02:22Nothing.
00:02:23Look, I've been coming here for three weeks now.
00:02:26I've been coming here for three weeks now.
00:02:27I've been coming here for three weeks now.
00:02:29I've been coming here for three weeks.
00:02:30I've been coming here for three weeks.
00:02:31This is not one thing.
00:02:33I've never seen him move so fast.
00:02:35He was reading the paper.
00:02:37The paper?
00:02:38That can only mean...
00:02:39A job.
00:02:40A fascinating job.
00:02:41Just a minute.
00:02:42Lowery up.
00:02:44They're so fascinating, it's not been notified here.
00:03:08Twist is the name, Sam Twist.
00:03:10Francis Courtney, at your service.
00:03:11Mike Weston, that's me.
00:03:13Delia King, miss.
00:03:15Dimple.
00:03:16Gabby Dimple.
00:03:17Lily Duveen, that's me.
00:03:19Montgomery, Enfield-Huffington.
00:03:22Seven.
00:03:22Seven, that's my lucky number.
00:03:23You're all right.
00:03:26All right.
00:03:29Good morning.
00:03:30Who's responsible in charge, you're here?
00:03:33Thanks.
00:03:33Oh, you must be Mr. Hayden, then.
00:03:35How do you do?
00:03:36Yes.
00:03:37I own this, Lieutenant's Great Thore, and have no chance to do the first meeting.
00:03:43Oh, yes.
00:03:44No, we haven't for this.
00:03:45You don't seem to understand my meal.
00:03:47Well, yes, certainly, sir.
00:03:48What's the job?
00:03:49There's no job, Miss Sat, for this.
00:03:51You don't seem to understand the basic only 25-0, Mr. Hayden.
00:03:55Well, look, just give all the details to my secretary of the assignment.
00:03:59You know, Miss Cooley, she's right there.
00:04:00Assignment?
00:04:01There's no reason to assignments, you know, Miss Cooley and Thames, say, in the Thames, say.
00:04:04You know, I've come from this monthly grill, and come to meet you as the Thames, therefore,
00:04:08and to principal for it, and I take it you're he.
00:04:11Well, we do undertake anything, yes.
00:04:13Look, you tell Miss Cooley all about it, will you?
00:04:15Really, this is the most provocative and courage mould.
00:04:17Here I've come to milk and the human kindly, and come to give it to you from the monthly thing,
00:04:21as you'll be afflicted first from month to month, you'll look in your hymn bowl for it,
00:04:24and all you can philolop me off in your secretary.
00:04:26A bit of a charm, Miss Mustard gave for it, but that's not the pearl.
00:04:29Well, I don't think that's too tough an assignment, do you, Miss Cooley?
00:04:32No.
00:04:34No.
00:04:36You've got a note of it, then?
00:04:37No.
00:04:38No, and I should think not.
00:04:39I'd even utter a worm, and I don't think I will for it.
00:04:42The age of his courtesy and his carriage mould in this comes to the way it's finished, I feel.
00:04:46And if you want me to convey my solicitor, I'll do his legal fur for it,
00:04:50and serve you a writ in the early mordee.
00:04:51I'll tell you, I can be as cold and legal as the next, sir, and crystal clear.
00:04:55Good morning.
00:04:58Oh, sorry.
00:05:00Was that a job?
00:05:02What did he want?
00:05:03New set of teeth, by the sound of it.
00:05:05A nutcase.
00:05:06Well, we get them.
00:05:07I mean, this kind of organisation is swamp with nuts.
00:05:09And customers, I hope.
00:05:11But not at the moment for you.
00:05:12Girls.
00:05:39They're right.
00:05:40How would you like to try on a lady's complete wardrobe?
00:05:43Would I?
00:05:44Get correctly, Ned.
00:05:44Oh, thanks.
00:05:47I suppose she won on points.
00:05:53Such a lovely idea.
00:05:55A first anniversary truce over your wife.
00:05:57Feels so good.
00:06:01Yes, doesn't look bad either.
00:06:04A perfect fit.
00:06:05Thank you, Miss King.
00:06:09Can't wait to try on the others.
00:06:57Perfect.
00:06:58A perfect fit.
00:07:00Thank you very much indeed, Miss King.
00:07:02Oh, it's been a pleasure.
00:07:04What a marvellous surprise for Mrs. Delling.
00:07:07Well, I expect you'll want a coffee when you're dressed.
00:07:09Oh, thank you.
00:07:10Perfect.
00:07:24Are you dressed?
00:07:25Oh, Mr. Delling, does it look like it?
00:07:27Helen, my wife.
00:07:29She's just getting out of a taxi.
00:07:31I thought she was away until tonight.
00:07:32So did I.
00:07:33Oh, well, it only means she gets her surprise a few hours earlier.
00:07:35It means she'll get one I didn't plan.
00:07:37What's that?
00:07:37You.
00:07:38Me.
00:07:39Oh, me.
00:07:40Quick, hide.
00:07:42Not in there.
00:07:44You haven't got time to get out.
00:07:46And I've not dressed for the street.
00:07:47Precisely.
00:07:47Come on.
00:07:48Can we just explain?
00:07:57Helen.
00:07:58What on earth are you doing here?
00:08:00I missed the train.
00:08:01It's not worth going now.
00:08:06Well...
00:08:07What's this?
00:08:09I know I'm absent-minded, but I'm sure I'd have remembered ordering all this.
00:08:14Did I?
00:08:16No, darling, I did.
00:08:18I wanted you to see them all and then wear some for our anniversary dinner.
00:08:22Oh, darling, it's the most staggering gift.
00:08:27Well, suppose they don't fit?
00:08:29Oh, they will.
00:08:29I've seen to that.
00:08:31How?
00:08:32Does it matter?
00:08:33Oh, poor darling husband.
00:08:36All upset and nervy because I've spoiled his lovely surprise.
00:08:39Never mind.
00:08:40You stay here and I'm going to go and make you a lovely cup of coffee.
00:08:42Well, it is rather manic.
00:08:43Helen!
00:08:44What?
00:08:44What are you doing?
00:08:45Well, putting my coat away.
00:08:47Well, you shouldn't even have taken it off.
00:08:49Well, why not?
00:08:50Because the central heating has given out.
00:08:52Darling, are you all right?
00:08:55Yes, perfectly.
00:08:57I think you need something stronger than coffee.
00:08:59Helen, give me that coat.
00:09:01That's no way to treat clothes.
00:09:02Let me hang it up.
00:09:03That little thing.
00:09:04Oh, what?
00:09:05I bought it two months ago.
00:09:06Give it away.
00:09:07Throw it away.
00:09:07It's certainly not worth hanging up.
00:09:09Helen!
00:09:10Please!
00:09:11Don't open!
00:09:17Father!
00:09:18Had a good look round in there, Mr. Darling, and I'll let you have the estimate for the
00:09:21new clothes rail as soon as possible.
00:09:24Morning, Mum.
00:09:28Darling, you're not going to believe this because, you see, he came to try on your clothes, but
00:09:32there's absolutely nothing between us, I promise you, because he's really a very nice girl.
00:09:37Oh.
00:09:48Sam, relax.
00:09:49Relax?
00:09:51I'll relax when I get an assignment.
00:09:52Everyone else is out and about except me.
00:09:54Oh, don't be silly.
00:09:54They're all on routine jobs.
00:09:56I'll bet you that fate has got something very exciting in store for you.
00:09:59Well, it'll be the first time in my life.
00:10:03Open hands.
00:10:05Oh, yes, with pleasure.
00:10:06Immediately?
00:10:07Yes.
00:10:09Right.
00:10:10Got it.
00:10:12What did I tell you?
00:10:13No.
00:10:14What?
00:10:15Something exciting?
00:10:16Babysitting.
00:10:34Good evening.
00:10:35I'm from helping hands.
00:10:38Hello.
00:10:40Come in.
00:10:41Do.
00:10:47Is this the right place?
00:10:49I mean, have I, um...
00:10:50Yes.
00:10:51This is the right place.
00:10:54Um...
00:10:55Panting?
00:10:56No, that's the way I always breathe.
00:10:58What?
00:10:59What?
00:10:59And your name?
00:11:01Um...
00:11:02Twist, madam.
00:11:03Sam Twist.
00:11:05Do sit down.
00:11:14Yes, well, uh, where's the baby?
00:11:18Oh, look.
00:11:23Oh, delightful.
00:11:26And so like you too.
00:11:28Yes, well, madam, uh, I know that you're wanting to get out and I have no wish to delay you.
00:11:32So if you just show me where the little baby is and...
00:11:35Oh, come here and relax, Mr. Twist.
00:11:39Relax?
00:11:41Uh, no, thank you, madam.
00:11:42Not while I'm on duty.
00:11:44Well, madam, uh, where is the baby, please?
00:11:47I haven't got a baby.
00:11:50It's my niece.
00:11:52Oh.
00:11:54Sit down.
00:12:00Uh, no, no.
00:12:01Oh, please, Mr. Twist, don't make it difficult for me.
00:12:04Oh, well, actually, you're making it a little bit difficult for me, madam.
00:12:08Well, I'll explain, Mr. Twist.
00:12:11You see, I have deceived you.
00:12:15I don't really need a babysitter.
00:12:18Oh, well, in that case, I'll just be going...
00:12:21But I do need a man.
00:12:23Mrs. Panting.
00:12:24You will help me, won't you?
00:12:26Well, depends what you want.
00:12:29You.
00:12:30Why me?
00:12:32Why me?
00:12:33Well, it could be any man, really.
00:12:35Just, I thought it better to keep the whole thing on a professional basis.
00:12:38I must have a man by eight o'clock.
00:12:40Well, we only supply helping hands.
00:12:44Why eight o'clock?
00:12:45Because that's when he gets home.
00:12:47Oh, so, yes, does he.
00:12:49Who?
00:12:50Mr. Panting.
00:12:53My husband.
00:12:56Oh.
00:12:57Madam.
00:12:59He neglects me.
00:13:01Oh.
00:13:02I find that difficult to believe.
00:13:03He ignores me.
00:13:05Oh, it's possible.
00:13:07He takes me for granted.
00:13:09Sorry not.
00:13:11I know he loves me.
00:13:13But I want him to show it more.
00:13:17Ask him to, um, have a little chat with him.
00:13:21No, it's no good I've tried.
00:13:23No.
00:13:23He needs a lesson.
00:13:25So do I.
00:13:26I mean, that he does, yes.
00:13:28I've got to make him jealous, you see.
00:13:29That's a ticket.
00:13:30He must find me in the arms of another man.
00:13:32Oh, you're so right.
00:13:33At eight o'clock.
00:13:34I'm the dot.
00:13:35Now do you understand?
00:13:36Oh, yes, Mrs. Panting, I...
00:13:38No!
00:13:38Oh, no, no, no.
00:13:39No.
00:13:40Please, Mr. Twist, it's nearly eight o'clock.
00:13:42You stay away from me, you dangerous lady.
00:13:44He's never late.
00:13:44He'll be here within seconds.
00:13:45Oh, my lord.
00:13:46He'll catch us together anyway.
00:13:47You might as well make it look good.
00:13:48Kiss me.
00:13:50Madam, mate.
00:13:51Kiss me.
00:13:52Kiss me.
00:13:52No, no, no, no.
00:13:53Kiss me.
00:14:00Panting.
00:14:03Let me go, you beast.
00:14:05Who can I help if I'm irresistibly attracted to other men?
00:14:09Mr. Panting, I can explain everything, sir.
00:14:12I come from helping hands, please.
00:14:13Oh, God, please.
00:14:14I can explain everything.
00:14:16My braces.
00:14:17I can explain everything.
00:14:19Your wife, my, my braces.
00:14:23It all started with the baby, sir.
00:14:26Darling.
00:14:27Darling.
00:14:29Did you hurt your hand?
00:14:32Mr. Panting.
00:14:42Attractive man required next week to model for our photographer.
00:14:46Oh, oh.
00:14:46Morning.
00:14:47Morning.
00:14:48Sorry.
00:14:49Blew off.
00:14:51Oh.
00:15:02Hi, hi.
00:15:06Yes, madam.
00:15:12Right away.
00:15:13Yes, certainly.
00:15:16Here we are.
00:15:17Job for you.
00:15:18As a model?
00:15:18Not yet.
00:15:19Lady wants someone to take her pet for a walk.
00:15:21It's a lovely day.
00:15:22It's a world of good.
00:15:23It's a nice address.
00:15:24Anyway.
00:15:27Good day, good day.
00:15:28I'm from helping hands.
00:15:29I understand you want me to take your pet out for some fresh air.
00:15:31Oh, yes.
00:15:32I got such an awful cold.
00:15:34I can't go out.
00:15:35There you are.
00:15:36Well, never mind.
00:15:37Where is the little chap?
00:15:38Here.
00:15:41Oh, I really, I...
00:15:43I rather, uh...
00:15:45Well, helping hands said they could do anything.
00:15:47And so we will.
00:15:48What's his name?
00:15:50Yoki.
00:15:51Yoki.
00:15:52Yoki.
00:15:52Don't let him out of your sight.
00:15:54No.
00:15:55Come on, Yoki.
00:15:57Achoo.
00:16:03Which way?
00:16:04This way?
00:16:05That way?
00:16:06Oh, down here.
00:16:07All right.
00:16:07Come along.
00:16:09Have a nice walk, shall we?
00:16:11Come along then.
00:16:12Walk nicely, Yoki.
00:16:14I don't care what you say.
00:16:15You're not bringing that thing on here and that's final.
00:16:17But he's tired of walking.
00:16:18Besides, I want to give him a proper outing.
00:16:20And the best way to see London is from the top of a bus.
00:16:23Not from the top of this one, mate.
00:16:24Great airy thing.
00:16:25I am not.
00:16:27I...
00:16:27Hold tight.
00:16:28I have a good mind to report you to the RSPCA.
00:16:31Cheeky monkey.
00:16:33No offense.
00:16:34Yes, the British Transport Commission should hear about this.
00:16:37I have never been treated like this before in my life.
00:16:40Taxi.
00:16:42Taxi.
00:16:45Can you take us to...
00:16:47I'll take you, but not your brother.
00:16:49I beg your pardon.
00:16:50We've had a long walk and we're very tired.
00:16:52Why don't you climb in a tree and have a kip?
00:16:54Thank you very much and good night.
00:16:57Charming.
00:16:57You see that?
00:16:58You hear what he said?
00:17:00Oh.
00:17:01Ooh, do you want to go somewhere?
00:17:03Ah, I see.
00:17:05You want to see your friends.
00:17:07And so you shall.
00:17:08Just in time for tea.
00:17:09Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha.
00:17:12Yes, come along.
00:17:39Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha.
00:17:45Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha.
00:17:46Morning, Lell.
00:17:47Morning, boss.
00:17:48Is it worth taking my coat off?
00:17:50Yeah.
00:17:50I've got a beaut for you today.
00:17:52Just collecting invitation cards, and being pleasant.
00:17:54I say that'll be nice.
00:18:18Good morning.
00:18:19Good morning.
00:18:21Well, that seems to be everybody, Mr. V.
00:18:22And quite a nice crowd of people there are, too.
00:18:24Yes, very.
00:18:25Is there any further service I can render?
00:18:27I mean, just collecting these cards in my hospital hands
00:18:29doesn't really add up to sweated labour, does it?
00:18:33Please be our guest.
00:18:34Oh, I see. Thanks.
00:18:38Are you a lover of the grapes, Mr. V?
00:18:40No, actually, no.
00:18:42I never know what to do with the pips.
00:18:43You know, flick away, collect in the palm of the hand or spit.
00:18:46Quite a social problem, don't you, Faye?
00:18:47Well, I've never really...
00:18:49Will you excuse me?
00:18:51Madam, for you, a soupçon?
00:18:53Oh, really? What kind of soup?
00:18:54Soup?
00:18:56Madam, there is no soup.
00:18:58But you just said there was.
00:18:59I did not, madam.
00:19:00I inquired whether you would care to taste our 1952 vintage.
00:19:03Oh, rather.
00:19:04Oh, such a pretty colour.
00:19:05Rather like Coca-Cola.
00:19:07Thanks, yes, I'll try it.
00:19:08Chircle.
00:19:10Madam, please.
00:19:12Please don't unsettle it.
00:19:14Wow.
00:19:14Oh, that's what they really call a drink.
00:19:16Yes, I'll have some more.
00:19:18Thank you. Fill it up.
00:19:19Fill.
00:19:20Yes, to the brim.
00:19:21I've had a taster.
00:19:22Now, let's have a proper drink.
00:19:23Madam, you don't seem to understand.
00:19:25You're supposed to taste several wines.
00:19:26Oh, don't worry.
00:19:27I will.
00:19:28Come on, fill it up.
00:19:34Not exactly heavy-handed, are you?
00:19:38Oh, well.
00:19:39Here's cream on your salad.
00:19:47Tickle.
00:19:53Nice.
00:20:05Bye, George.
00:20:26Hello there.
00:20:27Cars will stop.
00:20:28I see you have the Nuit Saint-Georges.
00:20:30Have I?
00:20:31A dignified wine, don't you think?
00:20:33Oh, very.
00:20:34Yes.
00:20:35I found it a fascinating experience.
00:20:37Tell me, have you ever...
00:20:40What are you doing down there?
00:20:42Getting up.
00:20:43But I can't.
00:20:45Come along, young lady.
00:20:46Up.
00:20:47No handling, if you please.
00:20:49But I was...
00:20:50I know your thoughts.
00:20:52That'll do.
00:20:57It's my soul.
00:20:59Well, it certainly was powerful stuff.
00:21:08Marvellous.
00:21:09Do you see that?
00:21:10I say do do it again.
00:21:11Madam.
00:21:17Oh, dear.
00:21:19Just shows you, doesn't it?
00:21:20First time must have been beginner's luck.
00:21:23I really don't...
00:21:24Night, night.
00:21:24I'm so sleepy.
00:21:26Well, you can't sleep here, madam.
00:21:27I say, what's going on?
00:21:28I don't know.
00:21:28I'm dropping off.
00:21:29Mr. Veen.
00:21:30Get her off me, will you?
00:21:31If my wife would have...
00:21:32What?
00:21:33You're a married man making advances to me.
00:21:35I didn't.
00:21:36Chuck him out.
00:21:37Mr. Veen, please.
00:21:37Listen, this is the second time I've been insulted at this doom.
00:21:41Mr. Veen, this is not a doom.
00:21:42Don't you speak to me like that or I'll do you.
00:21:45I'm most terribly sorry, sir.
00:21:46All right, all right, yes.
00:21:47I'm going.
00:21:48And I wouldn't stay here if you paid me.
00:21:54Really, sir, I can't apologize enough.
00:21:55Oh, I don't expect that.
00:21:56Come on, gorgeous.
00:21:58Hey, hold up there.
00:22:02Let's both get out of here together.
00:22:10Disgraceful.
00:22:11A load of drunks.
00:22:19We've got every single one of them working.
00:22:21On the day we've got our first office flowers, too.
00:22:24The sign of success.
00:22:26Flowers in the office.
00:22:27Isn't that wonderful?
00:22:29Cigar?
00:22:30No, I don't smoke.
00:22:34Come in.
00:22:36You again.
00:22:38I'd like no less more likes than me to be heed.
00:22:40Miss Cooley?
00:22:41Oh, not a grail.
00:22:43It's you I distinctly want for a Thorkus II.
00:22:45You to positively Thorkus II.
00:22:46And you I'm definitely going to Thorkus II, come what may load.
00:22:49That's right, yes.
00:22:50Just tell all the details to my secretary.
00:22:51Miss Cooley?
00:22:52Oh, perhaps I will.
00:22:56Perhaps this little lady we shall completely understand the simply method I have to offer you.
00:23:02Can I command your full attention, Hoad Maidler?
00:23:04A lovely day, yes.
00:23:06I'm not here discussing it the weather-eat.
00:23:08Yes, I think we ought to listen together.
00:23:10Now, you deal with it, Miss Cooley, please.
00:23:12Really, sir?
00:23:13There's no understand or reluctance in your eardrops to listen to my...
00:23:16It'll completely be on my compre-hoad.
00:23:18And your pretense not to understand the simple syllable which I was uttering.
00:23:21Are you from the sanitary department?
00:23:23I didn't catch that.
00:23:25He said something about the guttering.
00:23:27I did knockers.
00:23:28Oh, no.
00:23:29There's nothing wrong with the guttering.
00:23:30Even so.
00:23:31It's said in the third or fourth line which knockers in ternary pod or externary pod.
00:23:35And it's your responsibility.
00:23:35You didn't sign it for that.
00:23:37Oh, very interesting.
00:23:38You understand, Miss Cooley.
00:23:39No.
00:23:40What do you mean knockers?
00:23:41Do you think I'll come in here and stand and talk on the Dopplo Dutchery?
00:23:45Dutch.
00:23:46He's Dutch.
00:23:48We have a man.
00:23:50A landliney garbage man.
00:23:51Don't get excited.
00:23:52Listen.
00:23:53This man, very clever.
00:23:55He speaks 16 language.
00:23:57You come back.
00:23:58I am not Dutch.
00:24:00Now, look here, mate.
00:24:01I'm a very, very busy man.
00:24:02What do you think?
00:24:03I come in here and stand for a loafery?
00:24:04Oh, he wants a chauffeur.
00:24:06We don't compete with car, I affirms.
00:24:08Try down the road.
00:24:09I'm gone.
00:24:10But I recoil.
00:24:11To blaze with soliturous lessons all forms of communicale, save the English voice and
00:24:15its language.
00:24:16My voice and my language.
00:24:17This is an obsession with mode to convey to you the fullest message for understanding.
00:24:21By grace, I will fordoom that.
00:24:23I don't know what your little graves.
00:24:25But I'll play to the bitter hovers.
00:24:26By grabbers, I will.
00:24:27How dare you?
00:24:28And when I recoil, alert and refresh, you shall understand.
00:24:32Christ.
00:24:33And you.
00:24:35Handy?
00:24:36Handy?
00:24:37Who's handy?
00:24:37I am.
00:24:38Look it, I must say.
00:24:40Why don't you sit down?
00:24:41No time.
00:24:42I'm amalgamated scrap iron.
00:24:44You must be a millionaire.
00:24:46Four times over.
00:24:47Do sit down.
00:24:48I've already said no.
00:24:50Listen, do you provide substitutes?
00:24:52No.
00:24:53This is a respectable firm.
00:24:55You.
00:24:56Do you know the hospital up the road?
00:24:58Oh, yes, sir.
00:24:58Keep me place for me in the outpatient's department today.
00:25:01Eh?
00:25:02Didn't I make myself clear?
00:25:03Oh, yes, of course.
00:25:04But I just don't understand.
00:25:05I mean, after all, you're a millionaire.
00:25:07Four times over.
00:25:08And here you are going to a national health hospital.
00:25:10It's the principle of the thing.
00:25:12I buy my stamp every week and I have my money's worth.
00:25:14I really can't spare the time to vegetate in that waiting room.
00:25:18I've got four board meetings today.
00:25:19And I must take over international screws before five o'clock.
00:25:22Well, well, will you do it, yes or no?
00:25:24Don't you worry about a thing.
00:25:25I'll assign my best operative to the job.
00:25:27You won't.
00:25:29I want you.
00:25:30The head man or the deal's off.
00:25:32Very well.
00:25:33Have a cigar.
00:25:34Don't smoke them.
00:25:36Horrible things.
00:25:36Neither should you.
00:25:38Bad view.
00:25:40Oh, what a stench.
00:25:43Here.
00:25:43Have a flower to get rid of it.
00:25:51Good morning, doctor.
00:25:52Good morning, sister.
00:25:53Now, this is important.
00:25:54You'll be the first to see Sir Theodore when he arrives.
00:25:56And I want you to telephone me at once.
00:25:58Yes, matron.
00:25:58At once?
00:25:59Yes, matron.
00:25:59This is a vital inspection.
00:26:01I've instructed everybody.
00:26:02What he says goes.
00:26:03Is that quite clear?
00:26:04Yes, matron.
00:26:05But how do I recognize him?
00:26:06I've never seen him.
00:26:07Oh, yes.
00:26:08Well, he's not exactly handsome.
00:26:10But I'm told he has a certain rugged grandeur.
00:26:12And he always wears a flower on his buttonhole.
00:26:16Yes, matron.
00:26:23Doctor?
00:26:26Doctor, he's here.
00:26:29No.
00:26:30I'll phone matron.
00:26:34Hello, sir.
00:26:36Hello.
00:26:37This is an unexpected honor.
00:26:38Is it?
00:26:40Why, of course, sir.
00:26:41Well, that's very nice, of it.
00:26:42Matron will be along in a moment.
00:26:44Would you like to wait in the examination room?
00:26:45Oh, yes.
00:26:46I don't mind.
00:26:48Nice people.
00:26:52Good morning.
00:26:53Good morning.
00:26:54First patient, please, sir.
00:26:56Yes, doctor.
00:26:59Good morning.
00:27:00Good morning.
00:27:00Welcome.
00:27:01Welcome.
00:27:01Indeed.
00:27:02We feel most honored.
00:27:04Howdy.
00:27:05Good morning, sir.
00:27:05Would you please follow me, sir, Fyodor.
00:27:09Sure thing you do.
00:27:15Good morning, mageman.
00:27:16Good morning, sir.
00:27:17Good morning, sir.
00:27:22Good morning, sir.
00:27:25Watch closely, sister. You're seeing the world's most inspired diagnostician at work.
00:27:32He must be inspired to learn about a varicose vein by studying the patient's scalp.
00:27:38Watch, listen, learn.
00:27:41Never. What you mean, never?
00:27:43On that track, in the mud, never.
00:27:46Oh, yeah. I'll be following that horse.
00:27:48That's his trouble. Only punters follow him. Never other horses.
00:27:52Now, don't put me off. I'm doing you a favor. That's not a horse. It's a cow.
00:27:57Mind your own business. Okay.
00:28:00It's his funeral.
00:28:05Nurse? Sight ward.
00:28:09Oh, I'm sorry. Oh, I'm sorry, sister.
00:28:12Well, that's much too heavy a load for a little thing like you.
00:28:15Well, don't just stand there. Give it a hand.
00:28:20Let me help you, nurse.
00:28:25I want the help!
00:28:26Oh, cheer that chicken. It's all right. Here.
00:28:28There.
00:28:29Good for you.
00:28:30Where would we all be if we didn't help each other, eh?
00:28:33Right. Let's see some more.
00:28:37All great men are slightly eccentric.
00:28:40Yes, patron.
00:28:42Yes, patron.
00:28:43Yes, patron.
00:28:47Yes, patron.
00:28:47All right, lass.
00:28:49Good.
00:28:53Goochie, goochie.
00:28:55Oh!
00:28:56Little baskets.
00:28:59I mean, what, little baskets you keep the little baskets in?
00:29:02Oh, yes.
00:29:04I love kids.
00:29:05Have you any of your own, Sir Theodore?
00:29:08Well, I can't say I have. I can't say I haven't.
00:29:11Well, I always say that really brilliant men are a little absent-minded.
00:29:15Yeah.
00:29:26We give our nurses a regular check-up, of course.
00:29:31Well, now, is there anything else we can show you?
00:29:34I think I'll rest here a while.
00:29:36Come on.
00:29:43You're late.
00:29:44Where is he?
00:29:45Where's who?
00:29:45The man I hired to keep my place.
00:29:48What man?
00:29:49The man with a face like a relief map of the Himalayas.
00:29:53And a flower?
00:29:54Oh, yes.
00:29:55He had a flower.
00:29:56He's from Helping Hands.
00:29:57Where is he?
00:30:03Board 10.
00:30:04Board 10.
00:30:04Emergency.
00:30:06Yes, Sister.
00:30:10Sister.
00:30:10What is it?
00:30:11It isn't.
00:30:11Isn't what?
00:30:12I mean, he isn't.
00:30:13Who?
00:30:13That man.
00:30:14Which man isn't what?
00:30:15That man with Matron isn't Sir Theodore.
00:30:17Goodness gracious.
00:30:22Hello, Matron.
00:30:23That man's not Sir Theodore.
00:30:25He's an imposter.
00:30:26What?
00:30:40You're not Sir Theodore.
00:30:42Lady, I never said I was.
00:30:43Leave this instant.
00:30:44Yes.
00:30:45Right.
00:30:45Well, some other time then, eh?
00:30:47Any time you need help in hand, tell all your friends.
00:30:49Up!
00:30:58Yes, that's definitely my best side.
00:31:00Best side for what, Mr. Courtney?
00:31:03Oh, nothing.
00:31:03I was just...
00:31:04You were just rather hoping the photography job might go your way.
00:31:08What photography job?
00:31:10Would you like me to pencil you in?
00:31:12Well, I must admit, I would.
00:31:13I used to photograph awfully well as a child.
00:31:16All my relatives still treasure portraits of me.
00:31:19I was curly.
00:31:20Oh, you weren't.
00:31:22No.
00:31:24How lovely you must have been.
00:31:27Oh, do suggest me for the job.
00:31:29I'm most anxious to know how I'd photograph now in my maturity.
00:31:32I haven't been done professionally for ages.
00:31:35Leave it to me.
00:31:43Good morning, gentlemen.
00:31:46I'm your model.
00:31:48Can't believe it, eh?
00:31:50Well, I quite understand.
00:31:51There's no point in my being modest about it.
00:31:53I just do happen to have the perfect face for photography.
00:32:01We're awfully grateful to you, I must say.
00:32:03We tried all the top models in London and none of them would do it.
00:32:05I beg your pardon, would do, I mean.
00:32:08Poor fellow.
00:32:09Some of us have got it.
00:32:10Some of us haven't.
00:32:12You've got it all right.
00:32:14And soon thousands of poster hoardings up and down the country will have it too.
00:32:18My face.
00:32:19Won't you sit down?
00:32:20Good.
00:32:23Well, gentlemen, ready when you are.
00:32:26Let's go.
00:32:28Take your time.
00:32:29I'm rather difficult to light, I know.
00:32:31You're lit.
00:32:34I know your job, I must say.
00:32:36What's the product we're selling?
00:32:38I mean...
00:32:40Keep quiet still.
00:32:41Please.
00:33:09Come here.
00:33:10Come here.
00:33:11Come here.
00:33:16Oh.
00:33:17How is it done, Bal?
00:33:19Oh.
00:33:19Good morning, Sam.
00:33:20Good morning.
00:33:22Good morning, you say.
00:33:23Look.
00:33:24Look at that.
00:33:24You're late.
00:33:25You're late.
00:33:25You're late.
00:33:26Well, only a minute. No one else has arrived.
00:33:28Oh, only a minute, she says. Charming, isn't it?
00:33:31What would have happened if Julius Caesar had only been a minute for the Spanish Armada?
00:33:35What am I talking about? I don't know.
00:33:38Sam, are you in some kind of trouble?
00:33:41It's the worst.
00:33:43What's her name?
00:33:44Oh, please. It's worse than that.
00:33:47Look, Sam, tell me all about it and probably all your worries will disappear like a puff of smoke.
00:33:51Oh, don't say that.
00:33:52Oh, good gracious me. If you've got a hangover, it must be a real corker.
00:33:56Now, look, take my tip.
00:33:58Corker tip, please.
00:34:00No, hang on.
00:34:01Sam, what on earth is the matter?
00:34:05I want it.
00:34:09Cigarette, damn it, cigarette.
00:34:10Well, for goodness sake, have one.
00:34:12Come on.
00:34:12Why not?
00:34:13I've given it up.
00:34:13Well, then don't have one.
00:34:15I want one.
00:34:15Well, then have a... Oh, look, make up your mind.
00:34:18I have made up my mind to give it up.
00:34:20Well, then, there's an end to it.
00:34:23Oh, what?
00:34:24Sam, how long have you been like this?
00:34:26Oh, since yesterday's lunchtime, really.
00:34:29Oh, this is hell.
00:34:30I've got the answer.
00:34:32I've got it.
00:34:33A sweet.
00:34:34A what?
00:34:35A sweet.
00:34:35Oh, I don't know if you think about that.
00:34:38Well, I couldn't stand a day's inactivity without a sweet.
00:34:42Self-indulgence here.
00:34:43No willpower.
00:34:44Oh, look who's talking.
00:34:45Well, I can afford a talk if I want to, can't I?
00:34:47After all, I've been without it for 24 hours, huh?
00:34:50Without what?
00:34:51Cigarette.
00:34:53You just made me say that, didn't you?
00:34:54Oh, look at my sweet dog!
00:34:56Try not to make me say...
00:34:59Sorry, darling.
00:35:00I'm very sorry, sir.
00:35:01I'm smoking smoke.
00:35:02See?
00:35:03Can't do without it.
00:35:05I must have a smoke!
00:35:06I must!
00:35:07I must!
00:35:08I must!
00:35:12Watch it!
00:35:17Watch it!
00:35:20Watch it!
00:35:21Watch it!
00:35:29Oh, it's a human.
00:35:31Oh, it's a man.
00:35:34It's a man.
00:35:35Oh, that's a man.
00:35:36I think he has.
00:35:37Oh, okay.
00:35:38Oh, I must have no idea.
00:35:38Oh, yeah.
00:35:38Oh, that's a man.
00:35:39Better now?
00:35:40Oh, yeah.
00:35:43I swore that Raleigh certainly earned his knighthood.
00:35:51Oh, and it's strange, eh?
00:35:53Just a few puffs of that.
00:35:57Oh, and it makes the whole world look sort of all...
00:36:03most peculiar.
00:36:07Sam!
00:36:09Sam!
00:36:14It'll pass away.
00:36:15Well, so will you by the look of you.
00:36:17Don't worry.
00:36:19It's always like this,
00:36:21when you start smoking again after a layoff.
00:36:24Can you get up?
00:36:29Cigarette, dear.
00:36:30Sam, no.
00:36:31Please, Lil. Cigarette, please.
00:36:33No, you are going to give it up.
00:36:36Well, I can't give it up, Lil.
00:36:38I can't try six times it always ends like this, you know that.
00:36:40Let's face it, I'm a slave to them, I'm a slave.
00:36:43Six times, it's disgraceful.
00:36:46No, this time you are going through with it.
00:36:48Oh, no.
00:36:50I can't.
00:36:51Yes, you can. All you need is a helping hand.
00:36:55Funny, isn't it?
00:36:56A helping hand who needs a helping hand himself.
00:36:58Well, I'm gonna help you.
00:37:00How?
00:37:01Well, I promise I won't touch a single sweet
00:37:03and you won't have a single drawer.
00:37:05Together we'll share the experience of doing without.
00:37:08No sweets?
00:37:10No drawers.
00:37:19Yes, I already know you.
00:37:21Do you know who you are?
00:37:22You are a very sweet, sweet, sweet, sweet guy.
00:37:26That's all.
00:37:26He's on the nose.
00:37:27Full, full.
00:37:29If you ever do that, send him away.
00:37:31I've been a while.
00:37:32Yeah, just a moment.
00:37:33Yeah, just a moment.
00:37:36Oh, good day, Mr. Trelawney.
00:37:38I'm from Helping.
00:37:38Oh, yes, yes, I know.
00:37:40Come in, come in.
00:37:40Come in.
00:37:41You can start work at once.
00:37:43There.
00:37:45Now then, my dear.
00:37:47Would you kind of repeat what you said just now?
00:37:49Oh, I think you have understood me very well.
00:37:52Get out with him, but immediately.
00:37:54The lady wishes me to leave at once, sir.
00:37:56Oh, does she?
00:37:57Well, I'm paying you and I say you stay.
00:37:59Come in.
00:38:00Come in.
00:38:00Come in.
00:38:01Come in.
00:38:01Come in.
00:38:03Come in.
00:38:05Oh, gracious me.
00:38:06Well, what's she saying?
00:38:07Eh?
00:38:08Yeah, you're supposed to listen.
00:38:09Now, translate.
00:38:10No, I couldn't.
00:38:11Not that.
00:38:11Not in front of a lady.
00:38:13See, me shookeness.
00:38:14Idiot.
00:38:15Is the rent, we see.
00:38:16Oh, I say.
00:38:17I'm not interested in what you say.
00:38:19What did she say?
00:38:20No, I couldn't.
00:38:22No.
00:38:23Trevor.
00:38:24Ah, that's better.
00:38:26Trevor.
00:38:26Well, I know that.
00:38:27The name's the same in any language.
00:38:28What I want to know is what on earth my wife and I are arguing about.
00:38:31Ha!
00:38:33Look here, my dear.
00:38:34Would you care to elaborate?
00:38:35If that guy sits within two seconds, then I promise he'll let the lady in the head.
00:38:41Apparently, if I can't leave immediately, there's to be a physical assault.
00:38:44Stand your ground.
00:38:47On you.
00:38:48If only you'd let me finish translating.
00:38:49Very well then, since you're an interpreter here.
00:38:55There's no need for you.
00:38:57To be ignorant.
00:38:59To be ignorant.
00:39:00Of my sorrow and anger.
00:39:03It is this.
00:39:04It is this.
00:39:04Hey, what even I can get that?
00:39:06When a wife has a new hairstyle.
00:39:11And a new hat.
00:39:12And a new hat.
00:39:13And a new hat.
00:39:14And a new hat.
00:39:15She likes it to be commented on.
00:39:17And if he does not.
00:39:18Yeah.
00:39:19When it is not so.
00:39:21Yes.
00:39:22That only means one thing.
00:39:23The husband's interest is elsewhere.
00:39:30Probably with that old trollop of a secretary at his office.
00:39:34What is that all?
00:39:36Alles.
00:39:37All?
00:39:38Oh, you silly girl.
00:39:43Don't call me a silly girl.
00:39:45Oh, but you are.
00:39:46I am not.
00:39:47I am a deeply passionate woman.
00:39:53Oh, I know.
00:39:58I know.
00:39:58I know.
00:40:00Well, you don't behave towards me as if I was one.
00:40:03How can you say that?
00:40:05For a whole week you've shown no sign of love towards me.
00:40:15That's only because I was too tired.
00:40:17Yes, of course.
00:40:18My mood.
00:40:19He's tired of me.
00:40:20Oh, no.
00:40:21Darling.
00:40:25It's that brass stenographer.
00:40:34There's no need to be so convincing.
00:40:36I can't help it.
00:40:37I think your wife's got a point.
00:40:40Oh, do you?
00:40:41Well, you're here to translate, not to pass judgment.
00:40:43You don't come from a broken home, do you?
00:40:46As a matter of fact, I don't.
00:40:47Oh, well, I do.
00:40:49Beg of you.
00:40:50I beg of you.
00:40:51Think of your children.
00:40:52Yeah.
00:40:53We haven't got any children.
00:40:55You won't have it to go on like this.
00:40:57You tired.
00:40:58You with your hats.
00:41:00You ought to be thoroughly ashamed of yourselves as a pair of you.
00:41:10Please.
00:41:11Please don't upset yourself.
00:41:13I can't help it.
00:41:16Surely, darling, you're back in English.
00:41:18Does that mean...
00:41:19It means that our trivialities are as nothing compared to the profound emotional turmoil of this delicate and wounded soul?
00:41:28Well, make up, you two.
00:41:31That's the only thing that'll help me.
00:41:33If only for my sake.
00:41:35Make up.
00:41:39All right, then.
00:41:41All right.
00:41:42Yes.
00:41:43Yes, nice.
00:41:46Second's out.
00:41:47Lefty with it.
00:41:49Good, blimey.
00:41:50How bad.
00:41:50Bert Andy.
00:41:52I thought it'd be you.
00:41:53A little older, of course, but I'd recognize that ugly mug anywhere.
00:41:56Well, you should, blimey.
00:41:57You have to make it like it.
00:41:58It's marvelous.
00:41:58Let's sit down and have a nap.
00:41:59Wish I could, but this is business.
00:42:01Can't stop.
00:42:01Listen.
00:42:02You've got four open airs free tonight.
00:42:04I need a couple of seconds.
00:42:05You're not going back in the ring.
00:42:06No.
00:42:07Only as far as the corner.
00:42:08Bert, I'm in management.
00:42:09I've got me a fighter.
00:42:11Yeah.
00:42:11Dynamite Dan Grimsby.
00:42:13Never heard of it.
00:42:13You will after the light.
00:42:14His first fight in the fairground booth.
00:42:16Who's he fighting?
00:42:17Mickey McGee.
00:42:18Massive Mickey?
00:42:19Yeah.
00:42:19Are you going punchy?
00:42:20Listen, I'll tell you my kid's dynamite.
00:42:22Yeah?
00:42:22Yeah.
00:42:22I'll tell you what I'll do.
00:42:23I'll come to myself tonight just to gee him on.
00:42:25Will you?
00:42:25Yeah.
00:42:26And don't worry about the seconds.
00:42:27They're on the house.
00:42:27Good old Bert.
00:42:43Oh, harking great brute.
00:42:46And such a show off.
00:42:49Bit nervy.
00:42:51There.
00:42:52Not to worry.
00:42:53Just one big whack in his fat belly.
00:42:56That'll knock the wind out of him, you'll see.
00:42:58Who?
00:42:59Me?
00:43:00Yeah.
00:43:00Do you mind?
00:43:01Listen, I give the advice around here.
00:43:03Massage his pants.
00:43:08Ah!
00:43:14Oh!
00:43:15So sorry.
00:43:16I do beg your pardon.
00:43:17Right.
00:43:17Right.
00:43:18It hurt my finger.
00:43:20Oh!
00:43:21Get this one off.
00:43:23Oh!
00:43:24Oh!
00:43:25Oh!
00:43:25You'll be all right, son.
00:43:26No one, Nefty.
00:43:28This is a right horrible sprain.
00:43:29I can't fight tonight.
00:43:31You've got to.
00:43:31With one hand?
00:43:33Mr. Vincent, how can you be so inhuman?
00:43:35Ah!
00:43:36Shut up!
00:43:37Listen, Dan!
00:43:38Dan!
00:43:38He's a very hurt man.
00:43:40Okay, sir.
00:43:43Ready?
00:43:44No, not tonight.
00:43:46Hey?
00:43:48Well, he's sprained his little finger.
00:43:54Ladies and gentlemen, your attention, please.
00:43:58Dynamite Dan Grimsby is forced to withdraw oint to a sprained little finger!
00:44:10Oh!
00:44:14You unsympathetic lump!
00:44:15Why didn't somebody punch him on the nose?
00:44:18Why don't you?
00:44:18It's all your fault.
00:44:21Ha, ha, ha!
00:44:23Ha!
00:44:26Ha, ha, ha!
00:44:29Ha, ha, ha!
00:44:32Ha, ha, ha!
00:44:32Ha, ha, ha!
00:44:33Ha, ha, ha, ha!
00:44:33Ha, ha, ha!
00:44:33Ha, ha, ha!
00:44:34Ha, ha, ha, ha!
00:44:35Ha, ha, ha!
00:44:36Runner!
00:44:39Hey, you!
00:44:41Come on back and fight!
00:44:43Will!
00:44:44What are you waiting for, your honking great brute!
00:44:46Have it you or do I have to strike the first blow very well then don't say I didn't warn
00:44:50you
00:45:22Oh
00:45:47Run, guide! Run!
00:45:50Faster!
00:45:54Get up!
00:46:08He's coming, guide!
00:46:16Get up, guide!
00:46:19Get up, guide!
00:46:32Yes?
00:46:34I see. How very disappointing.
00:46:39I shall have to make alternative arrangements.
00:46:43Take care. Goodbye.
00:47:01Helping Hands Limited.
00:47:03I beg your pardon?
00:47:05I'm sorry, sir. I can't understand.
00:47:07Yes?
00:47:09Too loud now.
00:47:10I still can't understand.
00:47:14Now, sir, what was it you wanted?
00:47:17Yes?
00:47:19Yes.
00:47:21The what? Are you sure?
00:47:23I'm terribly sorry, but I find it very difficult to understand you.
00:47:29Yes, of course, I got a notice. Yes.
00:47:31Fourth Bridge.
00:47:33Rest assured, sir.
00:47:35Goodbye.
00:47:43I wish I'd turned it down.
00:47:45Oh, I'm glad you didn't.
00:47:47I mean, this, this to me is, it, it, it, it's adventure.
00:47:50I mean, it, it's like, what's the name of that thing?
00:47:52Um, the, the 39 steps, or the train and all.
00:47:55Oh, dear. I didn't hear him very well. It was all so indefinite.
00:47:59Ah.
00:48:01These things usually are.
00:48:04The agent, cool, alert, and debonair.
00:48:07He's only ever given a rendezvous.
00:48:10He receives his instructions there.
00:48:14I might even be contacted on the train.
00:48:18Ah.
00:48:19Scotland.
00:48:20A lot of hydroelectric stuff up there.
00:48:25I bet you this has something to do with atomic energy.
00:48:28Oh, gracious. I do hope you don't finish up in Russia.
00:48:32Well, if I do, Miss Cooling,
00:48:33I should behave myself as an ex-corporal of the pioneer course should.
00:48:37Name, rank, number, and keep your hand off me shoveling this a lot.
00:48:40Don't go. Think of brainwashing.
00:48:44How can they wash what isn't there?
00:48:47Well, by that I mean, of course, I don't know anything.
00:48:50Yet.
00:48:52Excuse me, Miss Cooling, my train.
00:49:00Well, au revoir, Miss Cooling.
00:49:03Or maybe, goodbye.
00:49:06Oh, dear.
00:49:12Come on.
00:49:30Going all the way?
00:49:33I heard.
00:49:34That's our man, then.
00:49:41What?
00:49:48Do youь!
00:49:55Come on,рий.
00:49:59Good job.
00:50:30You're not English.
00:50:33You're not Chinese.
00:50:36So what?
00:50:37So this.
00:50:38We might be on the same journey.
00:50:42Of course, dear.
00:51:04Trend of the month.
00:51:06Persevere.
00:51:14Okay, I'm persevering.
00:51:16So I see, and I don't like it.
00:51:18Ah, quit the pretense, baby.
00:51:20I'm your man.
00:51:21What?
00:51:22I'm very glad we've met.
00:51:23I wasn't all together looking forward to you jumping off the train.
00:51:27Huh?
00:51:28But that's okay by me.
00:51:29If you say we jump together, then we jump.
00:51:32Can't we talk this over somewhere less public?
00:51:41Sorry, mate.
00:51:44Brown wings.
00:51:47What?
00:51:52This is it, kid.
00:51:54We're approaching the bridge.
00:51:56Now listen.
00:51:57You've got to jump out.
00:51:59There's not going to be any contact down the train.
00:52:03When you jump, let every muscle go slack.
00:52:07Not now, stupid!
00:52:08When you jump.
00:52:11Okay.
00:52:12You're not nervous anymore, are you?
00:52:16No.
00:52:21Okay, kid.
00:52:24Near the bridge now.
00:52:25Your rendezvous.
00:52:26The bridge.
00:52:26Get going!
00:52:30Maybe...
00:52:31Maybe there is a contact on the train.
00:52:34Waiting for you.
00:52:36Yes.
00:52:37That's it.
00:52:38Waiting.
00:52:38Till the very last minute.
00:52:40Yes.
00:52:40To test your nerve.
00:52:42Yes.
00:52:42To see if you will prepare to jump.
00:53:00Excuse me.
00:53:01Yes, sir.
00:53:02Certainly, sir.
00:53:03Have you any orders for me, sir?
00:53:05Orders?
00:53:05No, I just want to pass.
00:53:07Are you sure, sir?
00:53:08Quite sure.
00:53:10Don't you want me for anything, sir?
00:53:12No, I do not.
00:53:43Stop it.
00:53:48No, please.
00:53:49END
00:53:50No, no, please.
00:53:51No, no, I say.
00:53:59Give me anything.
00:54:03Allia.
00:54:03Well, no.
00:54:04Algawayouine.
00:54:04Comming in at 290Qu
00:54:06Wink, wink, wink, wink.
00:54:20Helping hands?
00:54:22Oh, yes.
00:54:24Oh, it's you.
00:54:25Oh, yes, most honoured we are, sir.
00:54:27Trust everything's going according to plan?
00:54:30As you instructed, my man went to the fourth bridge.
00:54:33Went where?
00:54:34To the fourth bridge. Isn't that what you said?
00:54:37No, it isn't.
00:54:38What I wanted was a fourth at bridge.
00:54:41Oh, a fourth at bridge.
00:55:03This is it, Mr. Handy.
00:55:04Thank you, Miss Cooling.
00:55:07Publicity.
00:55:07It does not matter how well a firm is doing, it has got to have publicity.
00:55:11Yeah.
00:55:11Shut up.
00:55:13And that could very well be the finest publicity that this organisation could possibly have.
00:55:22Obviously, in a kitchen like this, work is a luxurious pleasure.
00:55:27And you can do so many things at once.
00:55:33Jolly good sell up here, old town.
00:55:35Oh, thank you, sir.
00:55:35But the PC's missing.
00:55:37PC, sir?
00:55:38Rather...
00:55:38Oxy cupboard.
00:55:40No, no, sir.
00:55:40We mustn't be naughty.
00:55:42Must we?
00:55:42Eh?
00:55:43You need manual control, and it will go as fast as you like.
00:55:47Observe.
00:55:55I say, there is a popsy cupboard after all.
00:56:06Perfect safety, but perfect.
00:56:08Fixed in a flash, and unfixed.
00:56:10Likewise.
00:56:30No.
00:56:31None of you children like to rock on the rocking horse.
00:56:33Don't you want it?
00:56:34Ride it yourself.
00:56:36Yes, I know what you want.
00:56:38Yes, come along.
00:56:39What about the swing?
00:56:40Anyone like a swing?
00:56:41None of you like a swing?
00:56:42No.
00:56:44Well, I'll have a swing myself.
00:56:46There.
00:56:46Just to show you.
00:56:47Isn't it lovely?
00:56:48Look at me.
00:56:50Oh!
00:57:01The all-purpose safety belt makes window cleaning, oh, so cosy.
00:57:05And pays for itself in only six tiny months.
00:57:09Ridiculous.
00:57:10Now, won't any little boy or girl sit on the other end and have a rock with me?
00:57:15No.
00:57:16Well, a grown-up, then.
00:57:18Do unharvest the all-purpose safety belt.
00:57:20All you do is...
00:57:21Oh!
00:57:22Oh!
00:57:22Oh!
00:57:23Oh!
00:57:23Oh!
00:57:24Oh!
00:57:25Oh!
00:57:26Oh!
00:57:27Oh!
00:57:31Oh!
00:57:32Oh!
00:57:34Oh!
00:57:36Oh!
00:57:36Oh!
00:57:38Oh!
00:57:39Oh!
00:57:44Oh!
00:57:45voice too loudly for fear of waking the people in the next house. I may introduce you also to the
00:57:51bed of the century. Here it is. Now, whatever it is that you like to do in bed, the bed
00:57:57of the
00:57:57century helps you to do it better. If you do not believe me, madam, come to bed with me. Ah,
00:58:05but
00:58:05first of all, the neighbors may be watching. That's better. And so, to bed, and we will find out.
00:58:27A little television, perhaps. The early morning cup of tea. Or maybe you feel like a little snack.
00:58:40Hmm? La Buffet. Perhaps you would like a nice, cozy read.
00:58:53Voilà. Or maybe you've come to bed merely to sleep. Hmm? It can happen, of course. Very well.
00:59:13The position not quite right, no? Well, how often that can happen. Very well. The bed of the century
00:59:21will solve the small problem for you. Merely recline. You must not move. The mobile mole-to-the-body
00:59:28mattress will do it all for you. Watch, watch, watch.
00:59:35Huh? What's going on?
00:59:40Freight! Freight! There's something wrong with the bed, Freight!
00:59:48Wagon train! No!
00:59:53No!
00:59:55Wagon train! No!
00:59:55No!
00:59:55No!
00:59:56No!
00:59:57No!
00:59:57No!
00:59:58No!
00:59:58¡No!
01:00:00Go!
01:00:00No!
01:00:02No!
01:00:03I don't know.
01:00:06No!
01:00:19Hey, you!
01:00:24You're not our loo.
01:00:26No, no, I'm not your loo.
01:00:28Your loo's a bit off-color today, you see, so, um, I'll come to take his place.
01:00:32In there?
01:00:33Never.
01:00:34Oh, it's quite all right.
01:00:35I know the rule.
01:00:36Absolute silence.
01:00:38You're not trained for it.
01:00:40Oh, come, come, come, please, Sarge.
01:00:43What training do you need just to keep nice and quiet for a few hours?
01:00:46Don't worry.
01:01:08Let's go.
01:01:12Let's go.
01:01:14Good job.
01:01:47Good job.
01:02:29Good job.
01:02:49Good job.
01:02:52Quiet.
01:02:53Quiet.
01:02:54Quiet.
01:02:56You mustn't speak.
01:03:05Good morning, Mr. Hamley.
01:03:07You look dazed.
01:03:09I am.
01:03:14What's it all for?
01:03:16Streamlined organization.
01:03:18Anything that's necessary for the business, of course.
01:03:21Perhaps you'd explain.
01:03:22Mr. Hamley, I have made some terrible mistakes.
01:03:25Now, Miss Coulomb, we're all human.
01:03:27You're a tower of strength to us.
01:03:28Every tower needs foundations.
01:03:31And these are mine.
01:03:32Look.
01:03:33As soon as a job is notified, it's filed here.
01:03:35Cross-referenced there.
01:03:37Tabulated in constant here.
01:03:38Assigned to the operator in question via the availability indicator.
01:03:41All of which, however, is secondary to the actual operative procedure.
01:03:45Oh, yes.
01:03:46Certainly.
01:03:46Operative.
01:03:47Yes.
01:04:06Oh, I don't suppose it'll matter.
01:04:18Morning.
01:04:19Morning.
01:04:22Ingenious system, eh?
01:04:23Yes.
01:04:24Oh, yes.
01:04:25There's no possibility of error.
01:04:26None whatsoever.
01:04:28Well, are you going my way?
01:04:29No.
01:04:30Oh, I thought we might share a taxi, you know.
01:04:32I'm afraid I wouldn't be very good company.
01:04:34Already thinking in Chinese.
01:04:36Chinese?
01:04:37Interpreting.
01:04:37That's my job today.
01:04:38Can't wait to get to it.
01:04:39Bye.
01:04:39Bye.
01:04:39Bye.
01:04:40Chinese.
01:04:41Very clever.
01:04:42I wonder if it's true what they say.
01:04:44Hey, Crouchy!
01:04:45Mr. Courtney!
01:04:54Good morning, madam.
01:04:56Dooshan?
01:04:57Pardon?
01:04:58Dooshan!
01:04:59Oh, yes, of course.
01:05:02Well, it's quite a coincidence.
01:05:04A friend of mine has gone all Chinese this morning as well.
01:05:09May I come in?
01:05:15Hi, Lord.
01:05:17Hi, Lord.
01:05:19Hi, Lord.
01:05:21Hi, Lord.
01:05:21Hi, Lord.
01:05:22Hi, Lord.
01:05:25Hi, Lord.
01:05:29Please, wait a minute, please.
01:05:31Please.
01:05:32It's been a mistake.
01:05:34A mistake is impossible.
01:05:37Oh, gracious.
01:05:37No.
01:05:38This must be Frances' job, this one.
01:05:48What's that's on for Ely, please?
01:05:50Number one, madam, over there.
01:05:53I'll show them if I need a keeper.
01:06:00Come along, girls.
01:06:01Come on through.
01:06:04Good morning.
01:06:05I'm your helping hand, I fancy.
01:06:07I fancy not.
01:06:08Go away.
01:06:09I get it.
01:06:10You expected me to be Chinese.
01:06:12Chinese?
01:06:13Well, we're quits.
01:06:14I expected your girls to be Chinese, too.
01:06:17I simply don't know what you're talking about.
01:06:18Don't alarm yourself, madam.
01:06:20As soon as I saw your girl's breasts...
01:06:22I beg your pardon?
01:06:23Breast pockets.
01:06:24Do listen.
01:06:25I was able to put two and two together.
01:06:27I want a policeman.
01:06:28No, you don't.
01:06:29I'll offer you a much better service.
01:06:31I do speak the language.
01:06:32A slight Cantonese accent, it's true, but good basic Chinese.
01:06:36Interesting group of girls.
01:06:37Europe here, of course, but obviously educated in China.
01:06:40On their first contact with London, and all it has to offer,
01:06:43you'll need someone like me to, uh...
01:06:46Well, shall we begin?
01:06:47Begin what?
01:06:48Just put yourself in my house.
01:06:50I'll go in the first taxi with some of the girls, and then you...
01:06:53Police!
01:06:54Madam!
01:06:55Police!
01:06:55Madam!
01:06:56What on earth do you want the police for?
01:06:57I don't understand.
01:06:58What's the trouble, then?
01:06:59I don't know, officer.
01:07:00I merely approached this lady ready to pick up her girl.
01:07:02Oh, you did, did you?
01:07:03Yes, you see, I speak Chinese.
01:07:04You speak what?
01:07:05Chinese, Chinese.
01:07:06Can't you understand English?
01:07:07Arrest this man.
01:07:09Oh, no, please don't listen.
01:07:11They speak English.
01:07:12Well, what's so surprising about that?
01:07:14They should speak Chinese.
01:07:16I mean, what the devil am I doing here if they can speak English
01:07:18as well as what you and me can?
01:07:19I mean, what you and me do.
01:07:22Arrest this man.
01:07:23You're all mad.
01:07:23I'm only doing my job.
01:07:24I'm a linguist.
01:07:25That's the first time I've heard it called that.
01:07:27How dare you?
01:07:28I protest.
01:07:29Now, shut up.
01:07:29They're handling a genius.
01:07:31Oh, this is all wrong.
01:07:32I protest.
01:07:33Ah, ooh, ah, ah, ooh, ah!
01:07:44You're Martin Paul, the actor.
01:07:47That's right.
01:07:49I thought this wasn't a beauty salon.
01:07:51Pardon?
01:07:52Ah, won't you please come in?
01:07:56But I don't understand.
01:07:57I'm supposed to be demonstrating a new beauty treatment.
01:07:59A very pretty mistake too.
01:08:01Mr. Paul, please.
01:08:02You're just what I need to help me dress and undress.
01:08:05What a wonderful organization you belong to.
01:08:07Mr. Paul, really.
01:08:08I like helping hands.
01:08:09And I don't like helping yourself hands.
01:08:11But, my dear, you don't understand.
01:08:12Would you please try and control yourself?
01:08:14My fifth marriage has just ended.
01:08:15What's that got to do with it?
01:08:16Oh, to the devil with my rehearsal.
01:08:18Console me.
01:08:19Have pity on me in my hour of me.
01:08:21Be kind to me.
01:08:22Who knows?
01:08:23You may well be number six.
01:08:24Ah!
01:08:25Oh!
01:08:26Oh, Tom, you're merry.
01:08:27I'm off.
01:08:36Pity.
01:08:45Good morning, sir.
01:08:46Good morning.
01:08:46Uh, Isaac.
01:08:47Uh, is the rehearsal being held here?
01:08:49It isn't a rehearsal.
01:08:50It's a demonstration.
01:08:51Well, call it what you like.
01:08:52Uh, where's Mr. Paul?
01:08:53Who's Mr. Paul?
01:08:54Incredible though it may seem, there's been a mistake.
01:08:57Through there I've assembled the cream of the beauty trade to watch a lovely girl undergoing our
01:09:02latest beautification routine.
01:09:04And have I got a girl?
01:09:05No!
01:09:06I've got you!
01:09:07Here, steady on!
01:09:07And I don't want you!
01:09:09Don't want you!
01:09:18Hello?
01:09:20Hello?
01:09:21Togetherness marriage agency?
01:09:23This is Leonard Beamish here.
01:09:25It's three minutes after the time she's supposed to have arrived.
01:09:28Where is she?
01:09:30Here I am on the verge of the most important meeting of my life and you can't even get her
01:09:33here on time.
01:09:35Now, it's no use for saying she'll be here in a minute.
01:09:37The fact is she isn't here now.
01:09:40I may say I'm extremely dissatisfied.
01:09:42The next time I want a wife I shall take my custom elsewhere.
01:09:47She's here.
01:09:57Hello.
01:09:58Mr. Beamish?
01:09:59Oh, yes.
01:10:03How lovely.
01:10:04I know that everything's going to be all right.
01:10:06I see no reason why it shouldn't be.
01:10:09How exquisite.
01:10:10How fresh.
01:10:11How exciting.
01:10:13May I come in?
01:10:14Oh, please.
01:10:15Please do come in.
01:10:22How very thoughtful of you to brought flowers for me.
01:10:24Well, that's what you wanted, wasn't it?
01:10:26A woman's touch around your home.
01:10:28Please do sit down.
01:10:29I shan't be able to sit down, I'm afraid.
01:10:31There'll be so much to do.
01:10:32Yes.
01:10:33Now, where do you want me to start?
01:10:35Oh, I'll leave that to you.
01:10:36Hmm.
01:10:39That doesn't look very comfortable.
01:10:46Comfortable enough for anybody now, eh?
01:10:48Yes.
01:10:51Isn't it wonderful?
01:10:52We're the same religion.
01:10:54Eh?
01:10:55I mean, isn't it a good thing that the agency takes care of things like this?
01:10:58I didn't know they did.
01:11:00Oh, but they do.
01:11:00Do they?
01:11:01Oh, definitely.
01:11:02I can't think why.
01:11:03Your personal beliefs don't concern me.
01:11:06The important thing is to get on with the job and enjoy it.
01:11:10But don't you want to talk?
01:11:11Even a little?
01:11:13Talk?
01:11:14We both know what I'm here to do, what's there to talk about.
01:11:16You sound much more experienced than I'd imagined.
01:11:19Oh, I've had plenty of variety since I joined the agency.
01:11:22Variety?
01:11:22Hmm, that's why I joined.
01:11:24Of course.
01:11:25But I don't mind.
01:11:26You must take the rough with the smooth, that's what I always say.
01:11:29What are you doing?
01:11:30Stripping for action.
01:11:32I like to be comfy when I'm working.
01:11:34Now, you don't have to do anything.
01:11:36Just leave it all to me.
01:11:37I think you ought to go.
01:11:39Go?
01:11:40But I haven't done anything for you yet.
01:11:41And I don't want you to.
01:11:43There's been a basically mistake.
01:11:45Oh.
01:11:46You specifically asked for flowers.
01:11:48I've got the instructions here.
01:11:49And I've got the letter here.
01:11:50Show me.
01:11:51Show me.
01:11:52Show me.
01:12:02Helping hands.
01:12:04Marriage agency.
01:12:07I thought you just wanted someone to tidy the place.
01:12:11A woman's touch.
01:12:13Ready for...
01:12:14For a tea party.
01:12:15I'm giving my aunt in two weeks' time.
01:12:19Well, now, here we are.
01:12:21Aren't their lungs?
01:12:23They look like birds to me.
01:12:26Right.
01:12:27Where's the show then?
01:12:29Olympia.
01:12:29Next year.
01:12:31Olympia.
01:12:31No, no, no.
01:12:32I mean, I mean your show.
01:12:33Oh, that must be a corker.
01:12:35Must it?
01:12:36Oh, you're crafty, you are.
01:12:39Dead crafty.
01:12:40From the outside, this looks just like an ordinary house.
01:12:43Where do you keep them?
01:12:44Keep what?
01:12:45You know.
01:12:46Oh, but I don't know.
01:12:48Oh, now, look, lady.
01:12:49If there's one thing you can rely on with our agency,
01:12:51it's discretion.
01:12:52And if you want me to do the job, I must know where they are.
01:12:55But... but... but they're here.
01:12:58Can you not see?
01:13:01Where?
01:13:03What do you mean?
01:13:04Where do the girls undress?
01:13:06But there are no girls here.
01:13:08Who does undress here then?
01:13:10Only the old woman when she goes to bed.
01:13:12Quiet, Captain Hook.
01:13:13Put his head in a bucket.
01:13:15You do and I'll bite your thumb off.
01:13:17Get out of it.
01:13:18Look, you are from helping hands.
01:13:21Of course.
01:13:22I'm your chucker out.
01:13:24There's been a mistake.
01:13:37Oh, hello.
01:13:39What do you want?
01:13:40Your birds.
01:13:41And I can't wait.
01:13:42Tell me, what sort are they?
01:13:44What sort do you like?
01:13:45Blue tits.
01:13:46Eh?
01:13:46Have you got any?
01:13:47No.
01:13:48No, this place is centrally heated.
01:13:50Oh, tropical birds.
01:13:52We have got one from Ceylon, yes.
01:13:54Ceylon?
01:13:55Oh, my goodness.
01:13:56How do I keep the poor things warm in a taxi?
01:13:58Look, uh, chum.
01:14:00Yes, sir?
01:14:01You got us wrong.
01:14:02This is a respectable place.
01:14:03You could bring your aunt here.
01:14:05Oh, can I?
01:14:07You're not by any chance from helping hands.
01:14:09Yes, that's correct.
01:14:11I'm afraid you made a mistake.
01:14:12Oh, no, I can't.
01:14:13You see, we've got a system.
01:14:15I asked for a chucker out.
01:14:16We've been having trouble with gatecrashers,
01:14:18rowdy elements, forged membership cards.
01:14:21I wanted somebody tough to turf them out.
01:14:23And you got me.
01:14:24I got you.
01:14:26Yes.
01:14:27Well, a job's a job.
01:14:29Orders are orders.
01:14:30When do I start?
01:14:31You mean...
01:14:32You mean you take the job?
01:14:34Yes, please.
01:14:37Well, bully for you.
01:14:38Thanks.
01:14:42Oh, I say.
01:14:45You're quite wrong, you know.
01:14:47I couldn't bring my auntie here.
01:14:53You're welcome.
01:14:56Gee up, gee up, gee up.
01:14:58You need a good punch up the beak, you do.
01:15:07Oh, how do you do?
01:15:09Good morning.
01:15:09I've been thinking about this earlier, Busy,
01:15:11and I was wondering whether you'd gather together now
01:15:12or ready for the frail, if you worried for that.
01:15:14Yes, sir.
01:15:16Perhaps I'll be able to understand you if you talk slowly.
01:15:19Now, I'm sure it's my fault.
01:15:20But do me a favor.
01:15:22Slowly.
01:15:22I have, for many growthers.
01:15:25Ohm's that an investor moat craved for him.
01:15:28And with all his frail, so I can follow through him to gate for you.
01:15:31I give in.
01:15:32I just don't understand.
01:15:34I do.
01:15:35You do?
01:15:36I understand.
01:15:38He gobbledy gooks.
01:15:39I don't care what he eats.
01:15:41You don't understand?
01:15:42Oh, no, I don't understand.
01:15:44Translate it.
01:15:44How do you do?
01:15:46How do you do?
01:15:46You might deploy in territory.
01:15:47Well, how extraordinary is necessary for dooling these.
01:15:50But you can strow over as messes, tell these peatloes,
01:15:53and Mr. Hayden's that there was golden.
01:15:56Mr. Handy, you'll have to prepare yourself for a shock.
01:15:58This gentleman is your landlord, and he's just given you notice to quit.
01:16:02Quit?
01:16:03Just because I don't talk his language?
01:16:05Racial prejudice, that's what it is.
01:16:07Really?
01:16:07No prejudice in some of the color patterns.
01:16:10Wow.
01:16:10Oh, no.
01:16:11Each man's investment involved, and that was the future's late for his own gale.
01:16:15And so that's what I've drove for him, and therefore us all have sarks.
01:16:18He says not at all.
01:16:19He's just received a much better offer for these premises.
01:16:21Oh, that's nice, isn't it?
01:16:23Oh, dear, just as we were settling in so comfortably.
01:16:26Well, I don't realize the problem's sown for this thing like this.
01:16:29I don't get the message hold for weeks and on him the day when we're trying to concert these peatloes.
01:16:33He says he feels very come up about it, and he's been trying to tell you personally about it for
01:16:37weeks to soften the blow.
01:16:39Well, I'm sure we would all chip in towards the cost of the rent increase.
01:16:42Oh, yeah, sure.
01:16:43Yes.
01:16:44Yeah, yeah.
01:16:45We're not having that.
01:16:46We'll have to find new premises.
01:16:48Where?
01:16:49Took you three months to find this place, and it's no palace.
01:16:52That's the end of helping hands.
01:16:53Oh, back to the labour exchange.
01:16:55Oh, no.
01:16:56Surely there must be some way out.
01:16:57Yeah, that door, we're sunk.
01:16:58Well, you're a defeatist lot.
01:17:00Surely there's something we can do about it.
01:17:01No, we'll just have to be sensible about it.
01:17:04It's a matter of business.
01:17:05In his shoes, I'll do exactly the same thing.
01:17:06If I was in his shoes, I'd run for me life.
01:17:08But it's not going to solve our problem, is it?
01:17:10All conscious and deep and a shed a tear for those problems of the human being,
01:17:13and the suffering of the wet seal in the water dangling in the early moority.
01:17:16But I've got to suffer, and I would say that you could all stay or remain if you couldn't suffer
01:17:22just a small, gracious generous.
01:17:23Our landlord says he has been very moved by our loyalty to this enterprise and by the nature of the
01:17:29enterprise itself.
01:17:30We can stay.
01:17:31Oh, good.
01:17:32Oh, well, that's nice.
01:17:35If, if we will do something for him.
01:17:37What?
01:17:38Oh, I'll do anything.
01:17:40Yeah.
01:17:40Yeah.
01:17:41Yeah, come on.
01:17:42I have, and it's the very environs and beautiful green lawns as England's never known, a great build isn't been
01:17:46the Baroque,
01:17:47and the very fine parapetters, hide the side, gargoyle on the front entrails, a filly groom,
01:17:52windy staircrapes up to the ceiling, fine glinty scintillade, the dangly chandelier,
01:17:56this fine central grave with Van Gogh-y cylinders on either side of the womb.
01:18:01And if anyone will come, gather together, workin' in the hell bone,
01:18:04and work themselves to a stick of the shadow of the former soul,
01:18:07so this 99 which here is Lisey was handy-ho, free Garver.
01:18:11His main business is property development.
01:18:14You know, the buying and the refurbishing of old houses.
01:18:17He's just bought the oldest and dirtiest house he's ever had,
01:18:21and the cleaning bill for it is prohibitive.
01:18:23If we will all clean it for him, he's willing to give us a 99 years' lease.
01:18:30Oh!
01:18:31Well, why not make it the round hundred?
01:18:34You'm shabby cakey.
01:18:35You shut your cake hole.
01:18:53You know, it'll take 99 years to clear up this dump.
01:18:55Yeah, well, step by step, that's the method. Little by little.
01:18:58Okay then, boss. Where do we start?
01:19:00Well, I reckon to make it easy for us to walk about, we ought to sweep the floor first.
01:19:03I don't wish to interfere, but I'd have thought it better to start cleaning at the top of the house.
01:19:07Yes, quite right. I mean, disturbed dust will only fall down and muck up what we've already cleaned up.
01:19:11Ladies and gentlemen, may I submit, with the greatest respect and for the sake of efficient team-working that we
01:19:17all belt up.
01:19:18Here we are.
01:19:19Always the gent.
01:19:20Oh, any commonness.
01:19:21Let us put ourselves in the hands of Mr. Handy and listen to what he says.
01:19:25Well, I bow to the majority, of course, but I'd like it noted that I did suggest the suggestion I
01:19:29suggested.
01:19:30And very suggestive it was, too.
01:19:32Yes, all right. Come on, that's enough. Here, over here, please.
01:19:34Who's the scrubber?
01:19:35Come on, that's enough.
01:19:36Well, I've done it.
01:19:37You know, I'm pushing you out.
01:19:39I'll be doing a nice straight line.
01:19:41Yeah.
01:19:42Oh, get in the straight line.
01:19:44Come on.
01:19:45Oh, sorry.
01:19:46Come on.
01:19:46All right, now.
01:19:47You ready?
01:19:48All right.
01:19:48Quick.
01:19:49Freeze.
01:19:50One, two, one, two, one.
01:19:52Oh, my God.
01:19:53Oh, my God.
01:19:54Oh, my God.
01:19:55Oh, my God.
01:19:57Oh, my God.
01:19:57Oh, my God.
01:19:58Oh, my God.
01:19:59Oh, my God.
01:19:59Oh, my God.
01:20:01Oh, my God.
01:20:02Oh, my God.
01:20:09There's no water.
01:20:10We will have to on the main.
01:20:14Oh, my, my line.
01:20:16Oh, my, a water main.
01:20:17Oh, my mind.
01:20:18I wonder where they are.
01:20:20Oh, my full shell.
01:20:24Come on.
01:20:26Turn it down and have a look.
01:20:28I find it.
01:20:29I'll show it up and you turn the tap on.
01:20:30Right, right now.
01:20:32Oh.
01:20:33Oh.
01:20:33No!
01:20:34Okay, then.
01:20:34Mr. Handy.
01:20:35turn the flaming light on the flame yes um i'm not at all sure though where they put
01:20:41oh don't go there's so few of us left well what about the flaming light the electricity supply
01:20:50doesn't appear to be connected and someone might have told you the stairs begin immediately
01:20:54well they didn't did they no they didn't oh can you find the water main in the dark i'll try
01:21:04oh blimey i found it with my blasted shin why give me a hand don't you stand there i say
01:21:12how on earth
01:21:13did you know where i was standing oh oh oh oh i just remembered i left the tap turned on
01:21:19we got it
01:21:35women and children first thank you mother come on
01:21:39Move! That's all I've got!
01:21:42You've got to take it down!
01:21:44You've got to take it down!
01:21:51Francis, where are you?
01:21:58Francis, where have you gone?
01:22:14Run!
01:22:16Son!
01:22:17Turn it down!
01:22:24Turn it down!
01:22:26Shut up the mines!
01:22:30Let
01:22:30down it! Shut
01:22:31up the mines! Move
01:22:36rightward, go!
01:22:46Are you all right?
01:22:48Are you all right, Gabriel?
01:22:49Of course he is.
01:22:50He's done it before, haven't he?
01:22:51The clock!
01:22:53Don't you charge in a rotten old door like that?
01:22:55Oh!
01:22:57Hey!
01:22:57Gabriel!
01:22:59I mean, any idiot can tell whether a door's solid or not.
01:23:02No, all you want to do is haste it.
01:23:04Simple.
01:23:05Ow!
01:23:06Ah!
01:23:06Ha-ha-ha-ha-ha!
01:23:08Ha-ha-ha-ha!
01:23:08Ha-ha-ha-ha-ha!
01:23:08Ha-ha-ha-ha-ha!
01:23:10Hey, guys!
01:23:13Hello.
01:23:14I'm all right.
01:23:16And I've turned off the main.
01:23:17You'll see.
01:23:18The water will die down in a moment.
01:23:26Oh, there's a big hole.
01:23:28Don't want to say I told you, sir, but I did suggest we start it upstairs.
01:23:32Look at all the mess!
01:23:34I'm looking!
01:23:35Let's face it, chums.
01:23:36We're done for.
01:23:37This is the end of helping hands.
01:23:38Oh, come on.
01:23:39Well, let's do it.
01:23:39Let's do what we can.
01:23:49What a remarkable is this organization setting up to be shown.
01:23:53How on earth you would know if I was to change my Milo in the midst trail.
01:23:56Decide to follow up and demolish all this property and to build a very fine luxury modern flabberblot.
01:24:02You're going to say that again?
01:24:04Flabberblot.
01:24:04Oh, cool.
01:24:06Remarkable.
01:24:07Truly remarkable.
01:24:13Well, it only leaves one thing to sum it up on this.
01:24:17What's that?
01:24:19Cariochus.
01:24:22Goodly by-load.
01:24:25What a remarkable organization you all are.
01:24:28How could you possibly have known I'd changed my mind and decided to pull this house down?
01:24:33He said you can pull down the greenhouse, the outhouse and the wash house and the...
01:24:36That fell down of its own accord.
01:24:38Yes.
01:24:39Yes.
01:24:39And he's going to build instead a modern luxury block of flats.
01:24:42And he said only one thing remains to be said.
01:24:45Carry on.
01:24:46Regardly!
01:24:47Recordlyů
01:24:58THE END
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