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The Miniature Wife S01E06 [Full Movie] [Trending]Full EP - Full
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00:11Whatever.
00:22If I was mom, what would my password be?
00:34Oh, yeah.
00:36Darling Daughter by Lindy McMichael Littlejohn.
00:39What if I told you I spent nine months building a jail, only to sentence myself to a lifetime in
00:45prison?
00:46That I've discovered is what motherhood actually is.
00:51From her adorable baby's face, those demonic eyes stare out, laughing at me.
00:56Yes, she's saying, I've ruined your fucking day again.
01:01Mommy, she cries, her voice a razor blade to my ears.
01:04I want her to call out for me.
01:06I want to be there for her.
01:07I want my maternal instinct to kick in.
01:09Why won't I?
01:10I dream of a life without a daughter sucking up the teat of inspiration, preventing me from being,
01:16fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck.
01:21Fuck.
01:22Mom hates me.
01:35But I thought I'd ask you just to say, what are you doing New Year?
01:44I got your invitation.
01:47A New Year's Eve brunch for me?
01:50I mean, I'm honored, but what, what, what problem is this?
01:55A new perspective.
01:57Oh.
01:58I'm embracing my six-inch self, and I realized I've been kind of a jerk.
02:05Hey, the jerk is strong, given the circumstances.
02:08See, you've been nothing but kind, Richard, and I wanted you to know I am grateful for you and your
02:16company.
02:18The course of true love never did run smell Shakespeare.
02:21No.
02:23New Year, new me.
02:25I'm sorry.
02:26Mama says it's never too late to begin again.
02:30Oh, your mom.
02:31So wise.
02:33Right?
02:33It's a new beginning.
02:34You know what else my mom said?
02:36Should we eat?
02:37It's just gonna get cold.
02:38Okay.
02:39Okay.
02:39Okay.
02:40Okay.
02:40Okay.
03:01A tremendous success.
03:03Subject expanded to regular size and stabilized for 2 minutes and 3.3 seconds, an increase
03:09of 1 minute and 32.7 seconds.
03:12Yes!
03:13Science progress!
03:14Yeah!
03:15Oh, great job.
03:18Well done.
03:18Great job.
03:19Oh, well done.
03:19Yeah, slowing the reaction down, way, way down.
03:21Help.
03:22Yes, the nuclei need time, which is acceptable to form stronger bonds.
03:27Yes, it's fundamental to, yes, for those fragile to cement those connections.
03:32Or alliances.
03:33Yes, yes, yes, yeah.
03:35Are we talking about science?
03:37Yes, Hilton.
03:39We're always talking about science.
03:40This is a lab of science.
03:42Okay, well, I heard a bang and then there was like a cheer of release, so my mind went there.
03:45Where's my head?
03:46Is there good news?
03:47It was a big win, yes.
03:48Slowing the expansion of the corn mitigated the molecular disequilibrium, yes.
03:54Translation, it's remarkable progress.
03:56Fuck yeah.
03:57We should celebrate.
03:58I'm having a New Year's Eve shing dig tonight at my place.
04:01Gonna be amazing food, crazy guest list, and you are all invited.
04:05Wait, it's New Year's Eve?
04:06I can't go.
04:08It's my anniversary.
04:09Oh, just bring Lindy.
04:11It'll be great to see her again.
04:12Well, well, I only organize fantastic parties.
04:18You gotta come.
04:20Done.
04:20Set.
04:20Happy.
04:21See you all there.
04:24Woo!
04:26Translation, see you all there means less only.
04:29And you can't say no.
04:35Do you think you'll bring Lindy?
04:36Um, I don't know.
04:38I mean, it's, uh, I don't know.
04:42Hey, I've done a lot of thinking, and I'm embracing my six-inch self, so new year, new
04:48me.
04:49I forgive you for shrinking me on purpose.
04:51Meet me in the dollhouse.
04:53I have an anniversary surprise for you.
05:00Oh, the missus, she left.
05:03Was she mad?
05:05She had two glasses of wine and left.
05:07Oh, she was mad.
05:08Maybe disappointed.
05:10That's worse, isn't it?
05:13Happy New Year.
05:15Charlie, what's happening?
05:21He shouldn't be alone right now.
05:23Let him go.
05:24Hi.
05:25Let him be.
05:26Hi.
05:31Hey, Lindy.
05:33Hey, Les.
05:35Happy anniversary.
05:38It's okay.
05:39Lay into me.
05:40I deserve it.
05:41You do.
05:45But I understand.
05:49You do?
05:49You're caught up in your work.
05:51And when you're in it, you can lose track of birthdays.
05:54Holidays.
05:56I know I do.
05:57Did.
05:59You supported me in the way I needed it.
06:01So, I'm supporting you.
06:07Okay.
06:09Mm-hmm.
06:09So, I was mad.
06:13I mean, I was alone in a restaurant on New Year's Eve.
06:19But then I came home and I got cozy and I was going to watch the ball drop with Lulu,
06:24but
06:24she won't come out of her room.
06:25Probably something to do with Steffi.
06:27And so I opened up a bottle of your do not touch until never wine.
06:33And now I feel better.
06:37I love you.
06:45I love you, too.
06:49I feel free to apologize profusely.
06:51And maybe next time bring me those chocolates I like from the drugstore.
06:54I am sorry and I apologize profusely for disappointing you and for forgetting our anniversary.
07:15It's like the big box.
07:17Yeah.
07:18Well, happy anniversary.
07:20Happy anniversary.
07:22All right, well, it's forgiven.
07:27I think you dropped this.
07:29Fuck you!
07:31Are you top dancing?
07:33No, fuck you!
07:35Hey, hey, I think this is down far enough!
07:38You know what, Richard?
07:40I think you're right.
07:48Hold on.
07:54This is not good.
07:56Oh, you think?
07:56You think?
07:57I can't believe you did this on purpose.
07:59On purpose?
08:00Why would you do that?
08:01Richard, hey, hey, hey.
08:03This is not about you.
08:03Where's my mom?
08:06No!
08:07Richard!
08:08Listen, we gotta talk about this.
08:10Let's please.
08:11No man could have resisted the siren song of that woman.
08:15The beguiling webs she weaved.
08:17The hypnotic allure of that brunch.
08:19She deceived me.
08:20She deceived both of us.
08:21No.
08:23You deceived me, Richard, for six and a half months.
08:27We share thoughts.
08:29We share science.
08:30We do not share my wife.
08:32Les, I'm sorry.
08:33Nothing else in between us.
08:34I see.
08:35Okay, you're squeezing kind of tightly.
08:38Les.
08:40Please.
08:41Where are we going?
08:43Les, no, no, no.
08:44No, no, no.
08:44Hello, Timorris.
08:46Les, please.
08:47Les, please.
08:48Les, please.
08:49Les, please.
08:50Les, Les, no.
08:52No, please.
08:52Les, Les, Les.
08:53No, no, no.
08:55Oh, hmm.
09:00No!
09:01No!
09:02Oh, please stop.
09:04My leg thing I'm gonna throw up.
09:06Let's go.
09:07Ah!
09:11Ah!
09:11Ah!
09:11Ah!
09:13Ah!
09:19Ah!
09:20The pet.
09:21His name is fuck you.
09:22I don't want to play with the bird.
09:23I don't want to play with the bird.
09:24Ah!
09:25Oh!
09:26Oh!
09:28Ah!
09:32It's, uh...
09:33The words, right?
09:36Good play.
09:37Good party.
09:40Oh.
09:41Ah!
09:42The pet.
09:43Is the pet.
09:44It's really lighter than the sword.
09:45Oh, my God!
09:48I'm not sure.
09:50I'm not kidding.
09:55Oh!
09:57Shit.
10:04What is he doing?
10:09What?
10:14What is that?
10:16Shut the fuck up, Space Enos.
10:26Live in darkness.
10:39Ah!
10:41Uh-uh!
10:45Uh-uh!
10:47Uh-uh!
10:52Richard?
10:56Richie!
11:09Richard!
11:11Richard!
11:13Richard!
11:21Richard!
11:27Richie!
11:29Richard!
11:31Where are you?
11:33Richie!
11:34I'm sorry!
11:36I know this is all my fault!
11:39Oh fuck.
11:41That is a lot of text.
11:44What?
11:51No!
11:52Oh my God!
11:53What is she?
11:56Good morning.
11:57We recently featured Pulitzer Prize winning author Lindy Littlejohn on the Read With Jenna segment of our show.
12:02We've learned Lindy's been accused of plagiarizing her recently published New Yorker short story, Untitled On Purpose.
12:09The shocking allegation originated from an unexpected and personal place,
12:13a viral TikTok video posted by the author's own daughter, Louise Littlejohn.
12:18So, my mom is a, quote, successful writer, unquote.
12:23Woo!
12:23She wrote one book, 150 years ago.
12:27Anyway, this week, out of nowhere, mom drops a short story in the New Yorker and everyone loses their shit
12:34over it.
12:35Well, I'm gonna let you in on a big secret.
12:38My mom didn't write it.
12:41She stole it.
12:42From one of her students.
12:44What?
12:44The actual fuck!
12:44My mom doesn't even write anymore.
12:46The actual fuck!
12:46She spends her days watching Housewives and making fake Paris review accounts so she can shit talk other writers.
12:51We were unable to reach Lindy Littlejohn directly for comment, but we were able to reach the author's mother, Diane
12:59McMichael Jones, who is widely suspected to have inspired the mother character in her daughter's Pulitzer Prize winning debut novel,
13:06My Rainbow Starts With Black.
13:08No, I have no comment.
13:12Except to say, I haven't read Lindy's little story, but I will say I didn't care for her portrayal of
13:18the mother character in her novel.
13:20The real crime is that Lindy made me out to be a terrible mother, which I'm not.
13:27What a wild, unexpected turn for Lindy Littlejohn.
13:31We'll continue to follow this story and keep you updated as it develops.
13:37I'm gonna let you in on a big secret.
13:40My mom didn't write it.
13:43She stole it from one of her students.
13:46The truth is, my mom doesn't even write anymore.
13:48She spends her days watching Housewives and making fake Paris review accounts so she can shit talk other writers.
13:55Oh, sorry, I didn't hear my name.
13:57I didn't call it.
13:58I wanted to bring it to you personally.
14:00Oh.
14:02Okay.
14:03I also have a complicated relationship with my mother.
14:07Here.
14:07The cake pop.
14:08On me.
14:09I hope you like vanilla.
14:12Thank you, St. Lulu to Lulu.
14:23And.
14:24When am I doing this?
14:26You guys are kidding me.
14:29Are you coming, lukeARA?
14:30For me Splayer populations.
14:35Put on me.
14:37Just in and out of mist, it's hurting my heart.
14:43Im always late thinking in on one day, I wish I knew you all my best.
14:53I'm very respected, I didn't know one of my best people about GerenCops.
15:05here's to us i thought you were bringing in us fuck that us new year new glass wow who knew
15:10hey no lindy tonight no no she's at home under a blanket not in a party oh well i can't
15:18say i
15:18blame her uh that interview turned into quite the greek tragedy but you can tell me i won't tell
15:24anyone other than everyone you should do it plagiarize the story oh i don't know what i don't
15:32know right answer deny deny deny all set for tonight everything is in place great oh general
15:39that word of course looking forward to the party trick party trick what a performance
15:46there are several important private equity investors here that hilton would love to
15:50impress with a preview of your tech absolutely not i am a scientist not a party clown you know
15:57the tech is incomplete what am i supposed to do fake it no it's just a preview short and sweet
16:02the corn is small ta-da the corn is big ta-da end of story it's fraud it's sales it's
16:09my ass in prison
16:10is what it is i've already got a journalist poking around the lab asking questions about bob the
16:14explainer's medbot brother-in-law what's to stop neils exposing me let me worry about neils and your
16:21ass it is one worth saving tonight the only thing on your mind should be no bell no bell no
16:31bell
16:36do you see what i say
16:42it's dr amiel schofhausen nobel prize recipient and a current committee member chair in fact
16:49i did my postgraduate work on dr schofhausen's theory of entanglement swapping he is a bona fide
16:54science genius yes yes yes just imagine what the support of a man like that would do for your
16:58work wrong it's just a preview short and sweet small and big
17:08ta-da
17:24hey why are you here why are any of us here oh god is this where we are um well
17:28everyone else is uh
17:30down the hall getting drunk as hell watching the tourists in time square freeze their asses off
17:34we're doing a shot every time a police force takes a dump i need something different in my life
17:44what's this something different
17:52did you open this no yes it's my job my eyes than yours
18:10what do i do
18:12oh it's him i know it you answer it you answer it it's your job
18:18i'm actually off the clock so you answer it
18:21what the fuck
18:27hello this is terry yeah it's me it's lindy oh i'm not missing a shitshell
18:32your phone is off for just this reason
18:36you're hiding from me because you failed me no no no no you failed me what happened to do nothing
18:44say
18:44nothing you don't understand i am so small i needed something well you're about to get smaller
18:56lindy the damage has been done the police committee is meeting and there's talk of rescinding your award
19:01no no not really no they can't they can and and they most likely will
19:06but but why am i without it
19:14a former client
19:18terry
19:19brutal but warranted lindy i tried i really tried but i'm somehow still clean in this this this
19:25shit storm shit sandwich a shit needle
19:27shit nado
19:29i warned you lindy and you chose jenna over me
19:33over our friendship our partnership i can't believe i'm saying this but i i
19:45i'm officially cutting ties with you
19:48terry
19:50please no please don't leave me i i have no one
19:55i am totally alone here i my my own mother my daughter my husband less fucking hates me
20:02it is truly over between us now and i can't lose you too
20:10i'm sorry it's come to this
20:24hey you had to i know it's hard i'll miss her too
20:28oh um miss oldham happy new year nothing happy nothing new
20:32why did you offer a jackie baldwin a six-figure book deal when i've seen no jackie no book no
20:37email
20:38no proposal sit she has the next big thing out well you better hope so no lindy no jackie no
20:44imprint
20:47love the top
20:50paper trail you're unclean
20:53so are you
21:12now i need a volunteer
21:35that's fantastic that's wonderful
21:38that's fantastic that's wonderful
21:40corn has been miniaturized into what appears to be one tenth its original size
21:46one twelfth to be precise and now
22:14this has serious implications
22:18so you know what you must be
22:19dr little john it's been an explosive evening
22:26quick the corn go
22:33here we are i was just saying to um dr schofhausen who was expecting an explosion
22:38how clever it was that we mitigated the explosion by storing the exothermally generated energy on a
22:43subatomic level yes it was an explosive
22:47discovery
22:50to an explosive new year
22:54to an explosive new year
23:06I've hit rock bottom.
23:13It's all fucking gone.
23:17What is the point?
23:28Richie, you're alive!
23:30Oh my god!
23:31No, no, no, you disgust me.
23:34I'm me and I'm disgusted.
23:37It consumes me.
23:38My heart, my mind, my soul.
23:41Everything hurts.
23:42Richie, oh god, I'm so sorry, but I...
23:45But...
23:46Well, but...
23:49A true apology should never include a qualifier.
23:53You're right.
23:55I'm sorry, no but.
23:57What I did was inexcusable.
24:01I had no idea Les was gonna react like that.
24:03I didn't think it through, I...
24:05I suppose a reaction of that magnitude couldn't have been predicted.
24:09I... I need you.
24:12Now more than ever, you have no idea what has happened to me.
24:16What happened to you?
24:18Yeah, the...
24:21I have the floor.
24:23Okay.
24:24I'm gonna finish my monologue.
24:25Of course.
24:27I was forced to do unspeakable things to one of God's beloved creatures.
24:32I was coerced into abandoning my moral code and playing a part in your marital folly,
24:38but I am not above reproach.
24:41I am guilty on two counts.
24:43One in the name of love, and the other...
24:46In the name of science.
24:49I believe in Les.
24:50I believe he'll solve the restoration formula before his 30 day deadline.
24:55And I will...
24:56Bank him!
24:59To forgive me.
25:00Then I will throw myself at the mercy of science in the hopes of being restored to my regular size.
25:06Please.
25:10Did you say 30 day deadline?
25:14That is what you heard?
25:16No!
25:16No, I heard it...
25:17I heard it all.
25:18The...
25:19Folly and the...
25:20Les and the...
25:21But...
25:22But!
25:23But what the fuck is the 30 day deadline?
25:26According to the contract, Les has 30 days.
25:29The sold the formula, or he's fired and the tech reverts to Hilton.
25:33He has 22 days left.
25:38He only ever had 30 days.
25:41And now he only has...
25:4222.
25:43Oh my god!
25:44Oh, it's closer to 21, actually.
25:48Another fucking lie!
25:50Oh my golly!
25:51Right?
25:52No.
25:52Wait, where are you going?
25:53I need space from you!
25:56Okay, but...
25:58I'm getting my own place.
25:59I'm getting my own place.
26:03Oh...
26:04Fucking less.
26:06He is gonna pay for this.
26:13What kind of monster makes a horrible TikTok video about their own mother?
26:17You are a spoiled child and a lying liar!
26:20Whoa!
26:20Mommy mad?
26:22If you thought that was crazy, wait until you hear...
26:26DJ Todd's remake!
26:28Yeah!
26:32Yo, my dog!
26:33My dog!
26:34My dog!
26:35My dog!
26:35My dog!
26:36My dog!
26:36My dog!
26:39My dog!
26:43My dog!
26:46If you can do that, it won't be a threaten.
26:48And a monster and a monster.
26:49And a monster, and a monster, and you will take a huge amount of money to our own mother.
26:52Yes!
26:53Ya!
26:53My lion!
26:57Who are you?
26:59What?
26:59Who are you?
27:01I don't recognize you!
27:03I'm St. Lulu DeLulu!
27:05You gotta have that right.
27:07Hey, I read the book. How fucking Lindy was my move?
27:11Very.
27:11See?
27:13I think you missed the point.
27:15That was the point.
27:18Want another drink?
27:20Sure, boss.
27:21Me too.
27:22Face yourself to Lulu.
27:33Can I fucking help you?
27:35I don't want your help.
27:37Wow, judgment from the shirtless wonder.
27:39She's your mom.
27:40She's a liar.
27:42You'll regret it.
27:44Fuck that.
27:45I am her literal regret.
27:48You sure are living up to that title, aren't you?
28:10You good?
28:12I'm peeing.
28:15You're scrolling.
28:18Fuck off, Tarzan.
28:20No one made you come here.
28:22My bladder made me come here.
28:23You think you're so clever.
28:25I know you came here tonight to see me.
28:27Yes, this is the guy who followed me into the bathroom.
28:31What if I did?
28:32What if I did?
28:32Is that for I knew?
28:34A little.
28:37Did you buy that?
28:39I kind of wanted to.
28:40Is that bad?
28:43Kind of.
28:45But you kind of liked it.
28:47You did.
28:49You followed me in here.
28:52Busted.
29:00Lindy.
29:02Lindy.
29:04Guess who's getting his big prize?
29:13This is going to open a bottle, but not to be open, never.
29:17Me.
29:20Oh, that's Richard.
29:23Richard?
29:26Doors?
29:26Richard?
29:27Oh, God.
29:28Oh, God.
29:30Oh.
29:32Is that blood?
29:33Who's blood?
29:35Is that human flesh?
29:38Richard?
29:39Richard?
29:41Richard, I'm sorry.
29:44I'm sorry.
29:46Richard?
29:47I was angry and I was hurt and I thought a few pecs would even the score.
29:52Richard?
29:56Richard?
29:58Please.
29:59Please, Richard.
30:00Reveal yourself.
30:06Lindy?
30:16Lindy?
30:18Lindy?
30:18Lindy?
30:18One, two, one, two, one.
30:30I'm going to kill the man.
30:33The man of science sold us.
30:44Are you anonymous?
30:47That is the only way this works.
30:57I'm not used to the Hulk-looking-tagger routine.
30:59I'm not scientific American.
31:01Do you know who I am?
31:03Yeah, you're...
31:06anonymous.
31:07You passed.
31:09Drive.
31:18Who were her?
31:24Richard!
31:25Janet!
31:27Happy New Year!
31:28Happy New Year to you two.
31:30Oh, what happened to your head?
31:33Oh, I just...
31:34I had an altercation with a bird.
31:36On the farm?
31:37Yeah, something like that.
31:39So, listen, I just wanted to say thank you for the quill pen.
31:44It, um, saved my life.
31:46Well, the pen is minier than the sword.
31:49I can assess for that.
31:51Where are you?
31:52I'm at the lab in the creepy basement,
31:55here to reboot the thermal energy tank.
32:00You drew the short straw again?
32:02Mm-hmm.
32:03Bob should have stepped up.
32:05Oh, yeah, it's...
32:06It's okay.
32:07I was, um, I was out anyway.
32:08Oh, you on a date?
32:11No, no, I was, um...
32:13It was a work event.
32:14You wouldn't guess where.
32:16Tell me everything.
32:18It was at Hilton's Mansion.
32:20He invited all of us.
32:21Me and the bobs.
32:22Well, not the bobs.
32:32No, not the bobs.
32:34No, not the bobs.
32:39No, not the bobs.
32:51I'm not the mobs.
33:19Happy New Year, lad!
33:33Where's Richard?
33:35Who knows?
33:36Weren't you the last one to see him?
33:38How's the formula coming, huh?
33:40What, have you got 22 days left or is it technically 21 now?
33:45Lindy!
33:45Either way, I bet you're so close!
33:49Make that the epitaph of my tiny headstone, fucker.
33:52I didn't want to tell you because I didn't want to worry you.
33:55And I'm not worried.
33:57I've accepted.
33:59You can't solve the formula.
34:01I will solve the formula.
34:02Fuck you, you lie even to yourself.
34:05I've made peace with being six inches tall.
34:08I even kind of like it.
34:10And I plan to make the next 21 days of your life be living hell.
34:15What?
34:16Why?
34:16Careful, sweetie.
34:18Your ass is on fire.
34:31Oh, God.
34:33I've created a tiny monster.
34:39Oh, no.
34:46Stars have claimed one of their own.
34:52It's been an honor, space colonel.
35:17I'll see your tiny cat, Dr. Little John.
35:20And raise you a tiny, silenced reporter.
35:28Ta.
35:30Ta.
35:34AHHHHH!
35:35AHHHHH!
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