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Taskmaster - S16E06 - Brother Alex [Full Movie] [High Quality]Full EP - Full
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00:40We are the Olympic-level testers of professional jesters.
00:45We're the World Cup for those who do stand-up.
00:48We're the summit of Everest for folks whose mouths never rest.
00:51We're the final of Wimbledon's for the trying-to-be-funny ones.
00:59We're the Henley regatta for those making laughter.
01:03The US Open Golf Tournament for people working in merriment.
01:07We're the World Championships of Sumo for individuals committed to making you go ho-ho.
01:13That's exactly my point.
01:18Please welcome Julian Clary, Lucy Momoa, Sam Combo, Sue Perkins and Susan Wakoma.
01:33And next to me, a man whose hair has gone so grey during the time we've been making this show
01:38that his wife told me, in confidence, that she no longer desires him
01:42and, in fact, wonders if she ever really did.
01:47LAUGHTER
01:47LAUGHTER
01:49I'm the Henley's hand!
01:53APPLAUSE
01:57All right, chat time.
01:58Er, I'm not going to have a chat tonight, actually.
02:00OK.
02:01I just... I have prepared something, but I've, er...
02:03It's on a QR code, so just scan that.
02:05LAUGHTER
02:08Is that a real QR code?
02:09Yeah.
02:10It does lead to something.
02:10Something really good.
02:12LAUGHTER
02:12What's the prize task category for today's episode, please, Alex?
02:15Well, listen up, guys, and listen up good,
02:18because it's the greatest thing that makes quite a loud noise when you shake it.
02:22LAUGHTER
02:23There are five points for the greatest thing that makes quite a loud noise
02:25when shaken, and the winner of the episode will win the lot,
02:27which will be the first time in television history
02:29that these very specific prizes have ever been won, Greg.
02:33LAUGHTER
02:34Hello, Susan.
02:34What is the thing that you've brought in
02:36that makes quite a loud noise when you shake it?
02:38It is...
02:40a waterbed!
02:42LAUGHTER
02:45When I was a child, me and my siblings,
02:47we'd bring all our mattresses into the front room
02:50and we'd all, like, have a little sleepover.
02:52For Christmas one year, my mum got a waterbed,
02:55and then we started playing with it
02:56and it made a really shaky sound.
02:58LAUGHTER
03:01Sorry, I got distracted,
03:02cos I thought I could hear a bird in the studio.
03:04LAUGHTER
03:05One point!
03:07LAUGHTER
03:08Do you want to hear the quite loud noise when you...
03:10Yeah, this might save it.
03:11Yeah.
03:13BUZZER
03:13BUZZER
03:14BUZZER
03:17All right, Susan, thanks!
03:19LAUGHTER
03:19Thanks for opening the batting!
03:22Sue?
03:23The magnificent thing that I bought
03:24that makes quite a loud noise when you shake it
03:26is that great, great, great Aunt Margaret's glass swan collection.
03:31LAUGHTER
03:32These actually have a history in that she was a survivor of the Titanic
03:36and most swans were also saved in the lifeboat that she got into,
03:41and they were passed down the generations.
03:42And it does make quite a loud noise when you shake it.
03:45OK, here go the swans.
03:48BUZZER
03:48BUZZER
03:48BUZZER
03:51BUZZER
03:51That's what someone's going to win.
03:53She...
03:53She didn't really survive the Titanic, did she?
03:56I mean, she was...
03:57Towards the end of her life, she was...
03:59She was a fantasist, so we don't know.
04:00OK.
04:13It's...
04:13There's a cream attached to it.
04:15Yeah.
04:15When you shake the cream, the noise comes out the horn.
04:18BUZZER
04:19BUZZER
04:20My God, this is a new low.
04:23LAUGHTER
04:25Can I just have some pints, please?
04:27Yeah.
04:28I'll tell you now, you're doing the best so far.
04:31LAUGHTER
04:31And that's incredible,
04:33bearing in mind you stuck an air horn onto a can of cream.
04:36LAUGHTER
04:37Sam.
04:38I've got that bucket.
04:41Lined with sandpaper.
04:43OK.
04:44Full to the brim of matches and fire alarms.
04:50LAUGHTER
04:53I mean, that is full to the brim.
04:57This is going to be a hell of a noise, right?
04:59Here we go.
05:14The worst round.
05:17LAUGHTER
05:19Taskmaster kiss.
05:20Hey, listen, my grandad gave me this and he was in the Hindenburg.
05:24LAUGHTER
05:27Julian, it's all for the take-in.
05:29Ah, yes.
05:30This is a drawer full of cutlery.
05:35LAUGHTER
05:36Looks like someone's back in the game.
05:39LAUGHTER
05:39I mean, just generally from my home
05:41and the cutlery is from the Isle of Wight Ferry.
05:46LAUGHTER
05:48OK, here's a drawer full of cutlery from the Isle of Wight Ferry.
05:50From the Isle of Wight Ferry.
05:51Yep.
05:52There we go.
05:52LAUGHTER
05:55APPLAUSE
05:56It's the worst ever.
05:58It's the worst round in 16 series.
06:01LAUGHTER
06:01LAUGHTER
06:03So who's getting the solitary point, Greg?
06:05Well, Susan, of course she is.
06:08LAUGHTER
06:08Next up.
06:09Yeah.
06:09I don't care if they were from the Isle of Wight.
06:12LAUGHTER
06:12Two points to Julian.
06:15At least something got destroyed with Sue's.
06:18LAUGHTER
06:18Three points.
06:18LAUGHTER
06:19I'm going to give Lucy four points for her cream horn.
06:23Lovely.
06:23And Sam Campbell takes home the big five.
06:25Really?
06:26APPLAUSE
06:31OK, what have you got for me, Alex?
06:33Mm-hm.
06:33Well, now, on Channel 4, it's Robot Wars.
06:37LAUGHTER
06:56This is the most impressed I've been.
06:59LAUGHTER
07:00LAUGHTER
07:04I've got knee pads on.
07:06Thank the Lord.
07:08Promising.
07:08Yeah.
07:10It's fallen over, that dog.
07:11Yeah, if you want to ride the dog, that'd be great.
07:15Thank you, Sue.
07:15What even is that?
07:17That's a weasel.
07:18Busy little shit, isn't it?
07:20LAUGHTER
07:22Is this part of it?
07:23Don't worry about the dog, he's happy.
07:27Avoid the rubbish robots.
07:30You may not remove your blindfold at any point.
07:33And at least one of your knees must be touching the floor throughout.
07:41LAUGHTER
07:44Longest time untouched by a rubbish robot wins.
07:49Your time's...
07:51Your time starts when the rubbish robot starts.
07:56These are the rubbish robots.
07:57The rest are just animals.
07:59Oh, so they're not my enemies?
08:00No, they're your friends.
08:03Are you going to ask me to kneel down in a masterful voice?
08:07Kneel, Julian.
08:11Right, that's what... Is that your starting position?
08:14It is.
08:14At times I've been asked that.
08:17LAUGHTER
08:19APPLAUSE
08:24Well, quite formal to be asked.
08:28LAUGHTER
08:29Is that your starting position?
08:31Then I'll begin.
08:33Sam hated everything about this task, correct?
08:36Yeah, yeah, yeah.
08:37I've loved some of the others, but this one I thought was a dud.
08:40LAUGHTER
08:43How do you feel?
08:43Well, I think we're all looking forward to watching it now.
08:46LAUGHTER
08:47First one.
08:48He came with hope.
08:49Will he leave with glory?
08:50It's Julian Clary.
08:53All right, Julian, here we go.
08:59Ah, no, it just hit your back foot.
09:00That's the end of the task.
09:03Is it over now?
09:04It's over.
09:05Well, I...
09:06Did you enjoy it?
09:08Didn't last long, did it?
09:09That sometimes happens.
09:11LAUGHTER
09:11Thanks, Julian.
09:13APPLAUSE
09:17That was quite right.
09:19It's not one of your best.
09:22LAUGHTER
09:23That was, for me, two and a half seconds of gold.
09:26LAUGHTER
09:27Who's next?
09:28OK, will they be jammy dodgers?
09:30It's Lucy and Susan to the rescue.
09:32I'm quite close to them here.
09:34Right.
09:36Right.
09:37That's where you're going to go, is it?
09:40OK.
09:41OK, well, your time starts when the robots start.
09:43Here we go.
09:44All right.
09:48I don't know what's going on.
09:51I don't like it.
09:55I don't know what's going on.
09:56I don't know how to do it.
09:59SCREAMING
10:00How can I feel?
10:01You want to avoid the robots?
10:04SCREAMING
10:07SCREAMING
10:11I trained at RADA.
10:16SCREAMING
10:22SCREAMING
10:23This is the future.
10:25This is what it's going to be like, isn't it?
10:27Everyone's trying to hide from robots.
10:30The whole point of, like, blindfold play is that you keep...
10:38Oh!
10:39You came with me.
10:39What?
10:40You've just been struck by a rubbish robot.
10:42Have I?
10:43I didn't know they didn't strike me.
10:45Look!
10:46I saw it hit you.
10:47It didn't hit me!
10:48Look!
10:49That's nowhere near me, mate.
10:51It struck your left...
10:52It didn't.
10:54Do they know I'm here?
10:56Oh, yeah.
10:57LAUGHTER
11:02Ah.
11:04Did you just get grazed on it?
11:05Oh, yeah, and again.
11:06I think...
11:07Yeah, I think that one...
11:08Yeah.
11:08I'm going to stop the clock there.
11:10Does it mean it's over now?
11:11Well, you say it didn't...
11:12We'll carry on if you say it didn't hit you.
11:14I don't think it hit me.
11:15I didn't feel it.
11:17Who's controlling the rubbish robot?
11:19God.
11:21SCREAMING
11:23Now it hit me, I felt that.
11:25OK.
11:25Well, I'll stop the clock then.
11:26Shall I go now?
11:28Yeah.
11:28Watch out for the robots.
11:29Ooh.
11:31APPLAUSE
11:37Do you think this is what the future's going to be like?
11:40Yeah.
11:40That is sort of like what my day-to-day life is like.
11:44That's my favourite task.
11:48To be fair, there were some genuine moments of jeopardy there.
11:51Her tactic was, I'm using my ears.
11:53Which is quite pleasant.
11:54She was listening for where the robots were, which is quite...
11:57It worked.
11:57She avoided the robots for three minutes and 42 seconds.
12:00God, that's good.
12:00That's good.
12:01APPLAUSE
12:03Susan had an interesting technique to avoid the robots,
12:07and that was to go into complete denial.
12:09LAUGHTER
12:10Complete denial that the robots had got anywhere near her.
12:12Yeah.
12:13I thought that was something furry,
12:14so I was like, that wasn't the robot.
12:15Yeah, I know, but the weird thing is,
12:16there was someone who was looking who...
12:19..confirmed that the robot did strike.
12:20No, by that point, I don't trust that guy.
12:22You were too deep in character, right?
12:24Too deep in character.
12:24As some nutter.
12:26Well, the first robot may or may not have struck her at 1 minute 56,
12:30and then we finally stopped at 3 minutes 03.
12:32LAUGHTER
12:32Are we taking the first one as a strike?
12:35Obviously.
12:35The one that did...
12:36LAUGHTER
12:37Maybe there was more jeopardy than you thought there, Sam.
12:41OK, if you are having a nice time,
12:43please stop having a nice time,
12:45because I present to you some adverts.
12:49LAUGHTER
12:49MUSIC PLAYS
12:56APPLAUSE
12:58Hello!
12:59Welcome back to the second part of Taskmaster.
13:02Yes, it's great to have you back,
13:03but I'm afraid there are still some rubbish robots
13:05causing absolute mayhem.
13:07We're down to the last two.
13:08It's Sam and Sue.
13:10Sue, can I touch the robot with something else?
13:12All the information on the task,
13:14please put it on your blindfold.
13:16Come on, Milo.
13:17Ooh, they're absolutely creepy AF to touch.
13:20LAUGHTER
13:22Can you see anything?
13:23No.
13:23OK.
13:25Can you see anything, Sue?
13:27Nope.
13:29UP
13:29Oh, OK.
13:30Right.
13:31OK, good luck.
13:32Your time starts when the robot starts.
13:38MUSIC PLAYS
13:40LAUGHTER
13:42GOOD
13:42MUSIC PLAYS
14:12Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
14:26I'm afraid that one of the rubbish robots just caught your left and right foot it's
14:34nice that you let your nephew come up with tasks and once every while it makes me appreciate
14:48the really good you've really got in for this task as soon as we saw shots from the rubbish robots
14:53perspectives Wow so your ferret swiping technique was pretty sweet I just needed to grab them by the
15:09tail and let them work for a living they both did good tactics by starting behind the robots instead
15:16of immediately in front of them but their times it's such an exciting task this one for one minute
15:24and four seconds Sue one minute and seven seconds Wow so the final score Susan actually came second
15:32with a woman at 56 gets four points Sue three points for one minute oh seven Sam two points
15:37woman oh four Julian one point for two and a half seconds Lucy three minutes and 42 seconds
15:43so it's a full five points to Lucy hey I'd love to see a scoreboard please Alex well she's actually
15:54in
15:54first place Lucy's got nine points in the lead
16:00and what is next pray tell okay next we have a team task in two places at once
16:24oh what is the post pull it do you think oh it's under it's in it's in here oh cool
16:31is it a guinea pig
16:35recreate your teammates garage scene you have 15 minutes your time starts when your teammate calls
16:43can I touch this oh shit oh Christ zero Oscar are you receiving over hello are you receiving me
16:54roger so you're right always you may not say any of the words on any of the labels you may
17:16not leave
17:17your location the most accurate recreation wins you had 15 minutes you've got an extra instruction there
17:32you can read it as long as you don't press a button on the walkie-talkie also you must try
17:38on all the
17:38outfits in the basket one at a time and not mention anything about it to your teammates yeah just to
17:46make
17:46life a bit more fun I'll just get them out of the box one at a time sure
17:52awaiting instructions
18:09everyone's going to be terrible at this we're going to see all them at it all at once in a
18:14montage
18:18okay your feet warm can you put down fast over it's a rug or a carpet or something oh I
18:26thought
18:26it was sauce in the center of the room I would like you to place a floor covering in the
18:32middle of that
18:33you could also position a piece of furniture used for sitting in right if you're looking at your rug can
18:39you put them on the right hand side and at the front over just put away Lucy those are the
18:45words there you're not
18:45allowed to say oh fuck's sake oh for fuck's sake please
18:51take a column of some description and put on the top of the column some statuary
18:57okay over and out
19:01is there anything else
19:03yeah there's loads of things
19:04something that you have in your house that's green and that you have to water
19:11that looks like someone I once went out with
19:13can you remember which hand I write with
19:16oh left hand that might be where you want to put the plinth
19:20so there
19:21the thing that they have
19:22in shops
19:27are you okay is there smoke is there gas in the shed
19:31you know what hand do you write with so that side I'd like another plinth
19:36and what I would like on that is something that goes quack
19:40is that making sense
19:41um you know those two things that they have in zooms
19:45they're very brightly coloured
19:47flamingos
19:48I want to
19:49yeah
19:49so many dots
19:51tell us where to put the things that we've got them
19:53okay brilliant right
19:55okay so
20:05and I'm facing the back wall of the garage
20:08waiting for you to respond
20:09roger
20:13right
20:14a rubbish receptacle
20:16with the face of
20:18a red-nosed
20:20entertainer
20:20I could just think of father christmas but I don't think he's a red-nosed entertainer
20:23he's just a red-nosed man
20:27where was the mannequin
20:28I'm going to go through all the positions
20:31in front of you
20:32plinth
20:33on the other
20:34plinth
20:35oh
20:36column
20:36column
20:37column
20:38the mannequin
20:39there's a door on the back
20:40you put the thing at the circus
20:42that kids are afraid of
20:44opposite ends
20:45so the thing that goes in the back
20:47you put the thing that they have on churches
20:50that's evil
20:51crucifix
20:52it's evil
20:53oh we'll go this hour I reckon
20:5620 seconds
20:57how long have we got
21:0010
21:01you've got 10 seconds
21:02we've got 10 minutes do you
21:04no 10 seconds
21:0510 minutes
21:0510 seconds
21:07right
21:08our task is complete
21:09I think you'll be very pleased
21:13sorry about your cough
21:15you want to suck a fisherman's friend
21:17oh
21:18thank you
21:26Lucy
21:26I sometimes think that you're doing some of these tasks deliberately badly
21:33for a large section of it
21:35you didn't even press the walkie-talkie
21:37so that people could hear you
21:40but
21:40you did press the walkie-talkie
21:43when you had a coughing fit
21:46Sam
21:47I don't know how the hell you got to flamingos
21:49given the description you were given
21:50which was
21:51those two brightly coloured things they have in zoos
21:54and you went
21:55flamingos
21:59that is yeah
22:00the mind is so
22:00like fascinating
22:02isn't it
22:06okay thank you
22:08I do think that when Sue goes into action mode she sounds like a second world war fighter pilot
22:15it's biggles
22:15it's so in control
22:17except
22:18there was one moment
22:20that I just loved
22:22where panic set in
22:23and caused Susan to go
22:25don't panic
22:28it's funny when I'm making notes watching these
22:30sometimes I forget why I've written them
22:31and I've I've written down
22:33can I have a clip of Susan shouting tits
22:37how long have we got
22:40tits
22:47it was definitely worth hearing again
22:54so how many words did they get wrong
22:56yes the team of two nine words wrong
22:57the team of three 27
23:00why why no
23:02yes she said left once
23:03front four times back three times
23:05duck once
23:06right twice
23:06right again eight more times
23:08back five times middle once
23:09rug twice
23:10they were on the board
23:11they were all on the board
23:14those left and right
23:15they were instructions
23:16I was giving them
23:17yes
23:17yes exactly
23:24this is a list of things you weren't allowed to say Lucy
23:32look at it
23:36so just bear that in mind Greg
23:37I'm bearing it in mind
23:40so we're going to see what they did
23:41the real garage in the middle
23:43you can see the mannequin represented in the bottom left
23:46all right
23:47they both did the kind of
23:48I think they genuinely did pretty well
23:50pretty good
23:51I've got a team of two six things pretty much right
23:53the team of three getting seven things pretty much right
23:55but they did keep saying all the words they weren't supposed to
23:58so if I penalise Lucy for saying all of those words
24:00if I took a point off them
24:01it would make that this was a tie
24:03all right
24:03so let's say three points each
24:05three points each
24:06three points each
24:11break time
24:12quick
24:12hop onto twitter
24:13and tell your followers that you're watching something on television
24:16feels like a good use of life right
24:18wrong
24:18do something else
24:20live
24:31oh yeah
24:33hello again
24:34it's part three of taskmaster and there's a bozo next to me
24:37who's just desperate to say something trite before introducing the next task
24:42right and now on to the next task
24:45which really is head and shoulders above the rest
25:06Susan
25:07hi
25:08ah there you are
25:11radiating your usual charisma
25:19a piece called heads shoulders
25:22knees and toes
25:28shoulders knees and toes
25:31knees and toes
25:36head shoulders knees and toes
25:38Knees and toes. Knees and toes. Knees and toes. Knees and toes.
25:42Knees and toes. Most powerful piece wins.
25:47You have 20 minutes. Time starts now.
25:49You could do a very powerful piece. That's all we're hoping.
25:52If someone could. Probably not me.
25:55But, uh, no, I could.
25:58Don't tell yourself that.
26:00When I was in Vietnam, I had to do an English class.
26:03The only thing I could think of was to teach them, like, a nursery rhyme,
26:06heads and shoulders, knees and toes.
26:08Knees and toes. What I didn't realise is there were two kids at the back
26:11and every time they bent down to do knees and toes,
26:13when they got up against your heads,
26:15they slammed their heads really hard on the desk.
26:18So part of me wants to do a powerful piece
26:21around how nursery rhymes can go very badly wrong.
26:24I would like A4 sheet of paper, A5 sheet of paper.
26:30Do you know which one A5 is? It's bigger than A4, isn't it?
26:34No.
26:34I think that we can incorporate some drama.
26:39I went to drama school, so I should make use of that money that I spent.
26:43She doesn't have any shoulders.
26:45No.
26:46She's got a head there.
26:48Is it going to be a script?
26:50We'll play it the fastest.
26:51What's the most Michael-E style?
26:58So I just need a knee and a shoulder and some toes.
27:02Yeah.
27:10So some great inspirational material that's going to lead to these performances.
27:15Three years in RADA?
27:16Whole three.
27:17How much did RADA cost you for three years?
27:1930 grand's worth, yeah.
27:2030 grand for what we're about to see, yeah?
27:23Just you wait.
27:25Just you wait.
27:26Lovely that you've got the experience and you're going to put on the best show.
27:29No.
27:29Lovely that Sue's show is going to be based on having hurt some children in Vietnam.
27:34Literally unwittingly, but yeah, it's cultural that you don't confront your senior,
27:38so they just kept doing it and hurting themselves because it would have been too rude to say,
27:43I'm walloping my head really badly with your weird English nursery rhyme.
27:49So the first piece we're going to see is presented by Sam Campbell.
28:01Inspector.
28:04A ghastly business.
28:06I can't believe it.
28:09Some kind of insane maniac has killed my parents.
28:14They've decapitated them and hacked them apart.
28:18They've chopped off their heads.
28:20Their shoulders.
28:22Their knees and toes.
28:24Knees and toes.
28:26The security here is really good, but somehow they've...
28:31Some maniac, some fruitcake has come in and my beloved parents...
28:35They've chopped off their heads.
28:38Shoulders.
28:39Their knees.
28:41And toes.
28:42Knees and toes.
28:44Will you cut that out?
28:47Can't you see that I am in the throes of despair?
28:51Look.
28:52Look at what they've done.
28:53They've chopped off their heads.
28:56Their shoulders.
28:57Their knees and toes.
28:59Their knees and toes.
29:00Knees and toes.
29:01Knees and toes?
29:03LAUGHTER
29:05LAUGHTER
29:07LAUGHTER
29:08Where'd you get that?
29:10LAUGHTER
29:11A bit late for a banana.
29:12LAUGHTER
29:12It's midnight.
29:14LAUGHTER
29:24I didn't think that would be the punchline.
29:27It's crazy, cos if you saw someone eating a banana at midnight...
29:31Yeah.
29:31..you'd ring the police, but he is the police.
29:34LAUGHTER
29:35I'm off to a strong style.
29:36Right, next up, two presentations in one.
29:39It's Julian and Susan.
29:43Heads, shoulders, knees and toes.
29:47HEADS
29:48HEADS
29:48HEADS
29:50HEADS
29:53HEADS
29:53Hello, Julian.
29:54Oh, hello.
29:55This is the best paper I could find.
29:57So it's going to be powerful, isn't it?
29:58I think so.
29:59I'm quite confident that it will.
30:01HEADS
30:02SHOULDERS
30:03KNEES
30:04AND TOES
30:05HEADS
30:06SHOULDERS
30:07HEADS
30:08KNEES
30:08AND TOES
30:09NO-ONE WANTS YELLOW, DO THEY, IN AN ARTWORK?
30:14Really?
30:15There are some nice pictures with yellow in.
30:17It's a matter of opinion.
30:19OK.
30:20HEADS
30:20SHOULDERS
30:21KNEES
30:22AND TOES
30:23SILENCE!
30:26HEADS
30:27HEADS
30:28HEADS
30:29So do you do comedy?
30:31I've tried, yeah.
30:34Sometimes sing in a band, Julian.
30:36Do you?
30:36Hmm.
30:37What sort of music?
30:39Sometimes it's jazz.
30:40Jazz brings me out in hives.
30:42I know, me too.
30:44HEADS
30:45SHOULDERS
30:46SHOULDERS
30:46SHOULDERS
30:48SHOULDERS
30:49SHOULDERS
30:49SHOULDERS
30:50SHOULDERS
30:51SHOULDERS
30:52SHOULDERS
30:53SHOULDERS
30:54SHOULDERS
30:58SHOULDERS
31:00SHOULDERS
31:01SHOULDERS
31:05SHOULDERS
31:06SHOULDERS
31:06SHOULDERS
31:10SHOULDERS
31:10HOOSE
31:13SHOULDERS
31:34SHOULDERS
31:36Such as it is.
31:47It was 30 grand, yeah?
31:49Yeah.
31:52No, come on.
31:53It was avant-garde.
31:54It was French cinema.
31:57It was.
31:57It was, you know...
31:58It was imagery galore.
32:00Loads.
32:00It was a comment on the death penalty.
32:02Was it?
32:03Yeah.
32:03And you thought the most powerful way of representing that
32:05would be with a duck.
32:07We're not going literal.
32:09And what is the comment on the death penalty?
32:12Er, that it's bad.
32:16You're welcome.
32:19So, Julian, as far as I can work out,
32:21sat making withering comments toward you
32:24about your lack of talent
32:25and then drew something,
32:26but I didn't see what he drew.
32:27So, this is Julian's powerful piece.
32:29Heads, shoulders, knees and toes.
32:38What is it, Julian?
32:39I just bothered with the bits in question,
32:42head, shoulders, knees and toes, so...
32:44You bothered with them in what sense?
32:45I didn't mean...
32:46In that you labelled them.
32:48And I...
32:48Well, I didn't bother with arms
32:50because they weren't in the...
32:53...task brief.
32:55No, it wasn't head, shoulders, knees, arms and toes.
32:57We've all known someone who looks like that.
32:59Yeah?
33:00Who's the person that you know that looks like that?
33:02Er, my nana.
33:05When she didn't have a tea thing.
33:10And this piece is powerful because...
33:13Well, it's...
33:14Is it anti-death penalty?
33:17It's anti-a lot of things.
33:20I'm just struggling for where the power is.
33:23I like it.
33:24I like it.
33:25That's the power.
33:27LAUGHTER
33:29OK.
33:30Do you want to see a health and safety presentation?
33:33Oh, at last.
33:34Well, here's one.
33:35Let's go.
33:35Via Sue Perkins.
33:39Nursery rhymes are a dangerous source of head trauma.
33:41Just ask Jack and Jill, Humpty Dumpty,
33:44and the old man who went to bed and bumped his head
33:46and couldn't get up in the morning.
33:47This...
33:48This guy,
33:49that's what happens when you recklessly attend a nursery rhyme.
33:53But...
33:54There's another way.
33:55Here at Perkins and Perkins,
33:57we supply ready, prepared safety equipment for all eventualities,
34:01like this guy.
34:04LAUGHTER
34:06Be less this guy,
34:07and more this guy.
34:09Be better,
34:10be Perkins and Perkins,
34:12and don't let a rhyme stop you in your prime.
34:14LAUGHTER
34:15CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
34:22FILL THE CONFIRMATION that, as if we needed it,
34:24you were born in the wrong era.
34:28So 50, isn't it?
34:29I really liked it.
34:30It sort of belonged in the cinema when we were kids.
34:32Remember the guy dressed as Death?
34:34It was terrifying.
34:35Donald Pleasant's going,
34:36Don't swim here, you'll drown.
34:38Oh, no.
34:38And then we're just children falling to their death.
34:42LAUGHTER
34:42It's a little traumatising.
34:44It's horrible.
34:44You kids don't know how lucky you've got it these days with adverts.
34:47Oh, buy a train.
34:49LAUGHTER
34:52Right, join us after the break for today's final chapter,
34:56where the winner will stand alone on the stage,
34:58celebrating their victory with some squirty cream and horn,
35:01and some broken glass.
35:03Woo-hoo!
35:04It's prime time!
35:06CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
35:14Hello again.
35:15It's part four of four,
35:17and we're in the thick of a task based on heads,
35:20shoulders, knees and toes.
35:21Knees and toes.
35:22We've had a painting,
35:23two theatrical pieces,
35:24and a health and safety demonstration.
35:26Finally, here is something macabre from Lucy Beaumont.
35:29WHISTLE BLOWS
35:32BELLS
35:35BELLS
35:37BELLS
35:38BELLS
35:38Brother Alex,
35:39I am bored.
35:41BELLS
35:42BELLS
35:43Can we play a little game?
35:50Seals.
35:52Shoulders.
35:53BELLS
35:54Oh, little lizard.
35:56Oh, that's a funny tattoo.
35:58That was from the 1990s.
36:02LAUGHTER
36:03BELLSwave
36:07Shoulders,
36:09knees, ho, little
36:11polie.
36:12Use a plaster on that.
36:15Knees and...
36:19Toes.
36:24Mummy!
36:51Mummy!
37:21Mummy!
37:51Mummy!
38:21Mummy!
38:51Mummy!
39:21Mummy!
39:51Mummy!
40:21Mummy!
40:51Mummy!
41:21Mummy!
41:51Mummy!
42:21Mummy!
42:51Mummy!
43:21Mummy!
43:51Mummy!
44:21Mummy!
44:51Mummy!
45:12Mummy!
45:13Mummy!
45:51Mummy!
46:21Mummy!
46:50Mummy!
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