- 8 hours ago
The Assembly UK S02E05 (2026)
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TVTranscript
00:04Oh
00:05Hi, we're gonna die. He might say yes if you ask him you cut him stare at him
00:11Don't take it easy. I know you got a cross from page but take it easy
00:16That's time
00:17I'm good. He's coming. Oh
00:19Yo, hey, hey, hey
00:21Oh my god
00:25You've got glasses
00:27Hello, hello, hello, hello, hello, hello. Okay. Nice to meet you. Nice to meet you. Nice to meet you
00:33Hi, yeah, let's do it. My name's Caroline. Nice to meet you Caroline. Why are you a rapper? Why am
00:39I a rapper? Yeah, I?
00:42Don't know. I don't know why I'm a rapper. I just it just happened. Do you love biggie? I love
00:47bigger
00:47What happened? Why did that shot? I don't know why he got shot. That's his business. I don't know about
00:52all that
00:57Hey, okay, what's good? What's good?
01:00Nice to meet you. Nice to meet you. You're not hating on your steps are you?
01:05No, there are other members in that band there are there are five members in steps. I'm the much younger
01:09better version
01:11Okay
01:14Get roasted. I don't get roasted
01:19I'm ready
01:24Ali introduce us
01:25Why are you wearing sunglasses?
01:29I've got a sore eye
01:30Oh, okay
01:31Hello and welcome to the assembly
01:34Our collective of autistic newer divergent and learning disabled interviewers
01:40Our rules are no questions are out of bounds
01:45No subjects are off the table and all might happen
01:52Can you please tell us who you are?
01:54Yes, my name is H. I'm from Manchester and I'm a rapper
01:58H which stands for Harrison, right?
02:01Yes, sir
02:01Nice one. I got it right
02:02Love that. I love that
02:05And we're gonna start with a question from Nicola
02:10Hello, Nicola
02:11Hello, Nicola
02:15Calm down
02:21What is your PIN number?
02:24My PIN number?
02:26What is your PIN number?
02:29No, your PIN number
02:32Oof
02:33Oh my days
02:34Nicola
02:35Yeah?
02:36I really don't want to lie to you
02:38But I can't give you my PIN number right now
02:40Why is that?
02:41I agree with him because it's private
02:43Only because everyone else is in the room
02:48Next question
02:51Why do people treat us like we don't understand?
02:59Because the fuckers
03:00That's why
03:02No, I'll tell you exactly why
03:05Because
03:06Some people
03:07Remember, everyone grows up
03:10Differently
03:10So, sometimes
03:13Stuff that's not considered
03:16Normal
03:17Some people don't know how to handle it
03:20I don't think they're being nasty
03:22I think sometimes people just don't know how to handle things
03:26Do you get what I mean?
03:28I know what you mean
03:29Yeah, I know what you mean
03:30Yeah, yeah
03:30So, how much you got on now?
03:33How much have I got on now?
03:35Yes
03:35Now, yeah
03:39So, I've got a watch on here
03:43How much is that?
03:44Ooh
03:45I love that golden watch
03:46How much?
03:47Yeah, how much is the golden watch?
03:48How much is the golden watch you're wearing now?
03:50It's the real?
03:51This watch is about
03:53Shit
03:54This watch is about
03:5670 grand
03:57How much?
03:5970 grand
04:00For that
04:00Yeah
04:01And your necklace
04:05Necklace
04:08Probably
04:10Maybe like 50
04:11Fucking hell
04:13Yeah
04:14I've spent a lot of money on silly things
04:15Okay
04:16Thank you, Nicola
04:17Thank you, Nicola
04:19Thank you
04:20Elijah, you're up
04:23Hello
04:24Hello
04:24Hi, Elijah
04:26Um
04:28Would you talk about a man the same way you rap about women?
04:31Have you called a man a bitch?
04:33Oh
04:34Oh
04:34Oh
04:37Er
04:40Okay
04:44It's a good question, that
04:45I feel like
04:45I definitely have said certain things
04:47Not just about when
04:48About everything
04:49That
04:50I probably wouldn't say again
04:53As a young rapper especially
04:55You think
04:56There's certain
04:57Things you have to say
04:58To
04:59To be a rapper
05:00Do you get what I mean?
05:01I've said certain things
05:03Because I've felt like I've needed to
05:05Not because
05:07That's what I really wanted to say
05:08Which is wrong of me
05:09That's what you should never do
05:10Your next song should be about
05:12How much you love women
05:13And how much you respect women
05:15It can be
05:16100%
05:16Yeah
05:18Are you a dancer?
05:19Are you a dancer?
05:20I'm not the best
05:22Er
05:23You know what I can do
05:24I won't do it for you right now
05:25But before I go
05:26I promise I'll do it for you
05:27I can do a handstand for really long
05:29Ooh
05:29You can stay
05:30You need a lot of space for that
05:32Yeah, yeah
05:32At the end
05:33I promise you I'll show you my handstand
05:35Okay
05:35It was nice to meet you
05:36Thank you, nice to meet you
05:37Thank you, Elijah
05:40How many children you had?
05:42What, in the past?
05:43Yeah
05:44Six
05:45That's a lot
05:48And now, Kieran
05:49My brother would always, like, defend me
05:51Like, just having autism and being different to everybody else around me
05:54Yeah, yeah, yeah
05:55I know that your sister's a bit younger than you
05:57Yeah, yeah, of course
05:57But did you ever get any stick from, like, your pals?
06:00Because she has a dancing job
06:02Not one person around me had anything bad to say
06:07I was quite lucky when it came to that
06:09Apart from one person
06:12Who...
06:13Really and truly looking back
06:14I didn't really consider him my mate anyway
06:16He was just part of the group, whatever
06:17And one time, actually
06:19He was, like, pretending to be me
06:22Rapping
06:23And then, like, said a line about my sister
06:25Yeah
06:26That I didn't really like
06:27Yeah
06:29And if you want me to keep it absolutely real with everyone
06:31I seen him a couple days after in college
06:35And I absolutely fucked him up
06:36Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah
06:39Do definitely not condone no violence
06:41But no-one can say that
06:43About anyone's little brother or sister
06:45Yeah, I agree
06:45Yeah, yeah, yeah
06:46So, one person
06:47And he'll never do it again
06:49I promise you that
06:49Fair play
06:51Thank you, bro
06:51Appreciate it, thank you
06:53H brother
06:54Thank you
06:54It's good
06:55Next up, our question's from Essin
06:57Can you give us a tattoo tour
06:59As I'm looking for inspiration for some tattoos?
07:02Oh, yeah, I can't
07:03I don't really like my ties
07:05Why?
07:06Why?
07:06I go on and off, but
07:08This one here
07:09It says, don't be afraid
07:10My sister wrote it
07:11That's what my sister says all the time
07:13Don't be afraid, yeah
07:14Gracie
07:15This is a cowboy hat with a love heart on it
07:18My other sister is called Hatter
07:19And we call her Hat
07:20This one is a symbol for Down syndrome
07:24It's like a...
07:26Oh, wow
07:26People with Down syndrome, they have an extra 21st chromosome
07:30Mm-hmm
07:30So that's my sister, Gracie
07:32Yeah
07:33This love heart here
07:35I got this matching with a random girl that I met in Germany
07:38Oh
07:38I was drunk and there was a tattoo artist in the restaurant saying, who wants tattoos?
07:43And she looked at me and said, should we get a matching tattoo?
07:46And I said, I don't even know who you fucking are, but yeah
07:49So that was that
07:50And I've got some on my chest as well, but I don't... I can't... I don't think...
07:53No
07:53Yeah, this is not... I promise, I promise
07:56I'm not flirting
07:58I was just looking for inspiration for tattoos for myself
08:01I'd go simple
08:02Next up, we've got Harry
08:04Oh, Harry
08:05Yeah
08:05The real H
08:07My name is H as well
08:08Yeah
08:10Love that
08:10With double Hs
08:12Double Hs
08:13If you were going out on a date with a lady
08:16Yeah
08:16What would be your romantic place to take her?
08:19Ooh
08:22I'm not the fanciest person in the world
08:24I like doing activities
08:26Especially on a first date
08:27Yeah
08:28Because the first dates are always the most awkward
08:30And this is what happens on the first date all the time
08:32You sit down at the table, you're facing each other and it's like
08:39Because remember, we've already spoke all the way in the car
08:43That's it
08:44Do you get what I mean? So we're speaking, speaking, speaking, speaking
08:46By the time you get to the restaurant, you kind of run out of things to say
08:49And then the next thing that comes out of your mouth is
08:50You're like this, you're like
08:53What are you getting?
08:57I'm enjoying this
08:57Whereas like, if you go do an activity
09:00Conversations are popping out left, right and centre
09:03If I'm going to take a girl to bowling
09:04And she bowls it straight away and it hits the gutter
09:07I can be like, hi, you're shit
09:08Do you know what I mean?
09:10And then, and then, and then she's like
09:11Who you talking to?
09:13And I'm like, you, you
09:13And then bang, you get what I'm saying?
09:15Now the conversation is flowing
09:16Gotcha
09:17And then you can do the whole
09:18Right, let me teach you
09:19Oh, crazy gov
09:20You know that one when you go
09:21Yes, I do, yep
09:22I know crazy gov
09:23You know what I'm saying?
09:23Yes, I do
09:24So, I'm more of an activity man
09:28Okay, Harry, have you got another question, love?
09:30Yes, I do
09:30So, when I overthink, I worry too much
09:39Always worried I'll think I'm getting on people's nerves
09:41And no one wants to help me out at all
09:44Do you ever feel let down with other people?
09:49Hmm
09:51Hmm
09:51Oh
09:53Sorry my eyes
09:55I feel like
09:57Yeah, people let me, yeah, people let me down all the time
10:00Hmm
10:02But I don't think you should see it as like the worst thing in the world
10:05Because like no one's, no one's living for you
10:08You've got to live your own life
10:11You are going to get let down every now and again
10:13And sometimes it's not because the other person is a bastard
10:17It's just because they've happened to let you down this time
10:20Hopefully they won't next time kind of thing
10:22Yeah, yeah, yeah
10:22Blimey, sorry about that
10:23There's no more to cry, Harry
10:25Don't worry, Harry
10:25Be happy
10:26Oh, I've got to be overwhelmed a bit now
10:28Sorry, H
10:29No, no, don't worry about that
10:30Oh, blimey
10:32Good job I've got shades on, innit?
10:34Yeah, yeah
10:37Please take my advice and just...
10:40Yeah
10:42I'll take that advice as well
10:45Yeah
10:57Are you in army?
10:59I'm in trousers
11:00No, I'm not in the army
11:01No, no
11:03I'm not
11:03I'm not
11:06I'm not
11:07Nice to meet you
11:07Nice to meet you, bro
11:09Have you seen any benefits?
11:11To being a white rapper?
11:13Or
11:14Do you think it's harder?
11:19Alright, cool
11:21I'm not going to say it's harder
11:22But you definitely don't get taken as seriously
11:25When I wanted people to take me in
11:27I would always get people
11:30To listen to the audio
11:31Not watch the video
11:33I like that
11:34Because when
11:35When
11:36Let's just
11:36I'm just going to get real with you
11:37I'm not some dumb white boy
11:39I know how shit it looks
11:40For a white man to be rapping
11:43Yeah
11:44You have to be pretty decent
11:45In my opinion
11:46Otherwise
11:47Even
11:48Even I'm going to scroll
11:49This is really bad of me to say
11:50By the way
11:51But I'm going to say it like
11:51Go on
11:52Even I have to
11:54Double take at a white rapper
11:56I didn't have a skinhead these times
11:57I had a proper white boy haircut
11:59Comb over
11:59And it was like
12:01I don't want people to watch this
12:02And just not even listen to what I'm saying
12:04Because of what I look like
12:06So
12:07To answer your question
12:08Is it harder or easier?
12:10It depends what
12:11Situation you're in
12:13If it was just as simple as
12:15The white rapper can smash it
12:17There would be 20 big white rappers right now
12:20And there's not
12:21It really just comes down to like
12:22You're in for the craft
12:24And you love what you do
12:25Which shines through the audio
12:27Exactly
12:27Exactly
12:28Yeah
12:28I can feel that just from talking to you
12:30Thank you
12:31Nice to meet you
12:32I love that
12:33Do you swear your whacks?
12:34I do sometimes
12:35I shouldn't
12:36I know
12:37I know I shouldn't swear
12:38But swear words are good sometimes
12:39Okay
12:43Now we've got Jodie
12:46I can't do this
12:47Yeah you can
12:48I know I can
12:49You know you was in the jungle
12:51Yeah
12:51Do you like spiders?
12:54I did
12:55I could deal with it
12:56Okay I'll tell you a story about me
12:57Okay go on
12:58There was a spider in my room
12:59I was screaming
13:01So my mum and my dad had to get it out
13:03Yeah yeah yeah
13:04And I didn't like it
13:04So I don't want to be in the jungle either
13:06Yeah yeah
13:07I didn't like spiders yeah
13:08But when you're in the jungle
13:09You're so hungry
13:11Do you like EastEnders?
13:13I know where this is going
13:15Who's your favourite character in EastEnders?
13:17Well
13:18I only really know two characters in EastEnders
13:21Yeah Whitney
13:22Yeah Whitney
13:23Why are you flirting with?
13:25I wasn't flirting with her
13:26Do you think I was?
13:28Yeah you was because I saw you in my own eyes
13:30Really?
13:31You went out with her or something?
13:33I've not gone out with her no
13:34Are you sure?
13:35I'll take you on a date
13:36You can take me on a date
13:37Yeah yeah yeah
13:37Any day
13:38We'll go on a date instead
13:39Well done Jones
13:40Thank you
13:41I know you would say that
13:44Jacob
13:46Hello Aitch
13:47Hello
13:48I've read you've got into a few fights
13:50Do you still get into fights?
13:52I haven't had a fight for years
13:53But when you did fight
13:55Did you kick, hit or punch them?
13:58Did you do one of those things?
13:59Did you do two of those things?
14:01Did you do three of those things?
14:02I've done two of those things
14:03I like to punch and kick
14:04I used to be a kickboxer
14:05And the person who said nasty things about my little sister
14:09I punched and kicked him
14:10So you did two of those things?
14:12I did two of those things
14:13I was just punching and kicking
14:14And elbowing and kneeing
14:16So that's three
14:16Does a knee still class as a kick?
14:18We're still using our legs
14:19Well kicking's like this
14:21Yeah yeah yeah yeah
14:22Yeah
14:22Alright so maybe I've done four things then
14:24Thank you Aitch
14:26Good interviewing you
14:27I'll show you
14:27Pleasure
14:28Thank you very much
14:29Thank you
14:31We're gonna hear from Kate
14:35Hello
14:35Hello Kate
14:36Hi
14:37I'm 47
14:38Yeah
14:40What do you hope Grace
14:42Will be
14:43Like when she is my age?
14:48Honestly
14:49Not to get all soppy
14:50I just hope she's
14:51I just hope she's happy
14:52She's safe
14:53And I hope that
14:55She's still
14:57Enjoying life
14:58Every single day
14:59Because
15:01Right now she never has a bad day
15:03She wakes up in the morning
15:04And it's fun fun fun fun fun fun fun fun fun fun fun fun fun fun fun fun
15:07Until she falls asleep
15:09And then she wakes up and we go again
15:10So hopefully that still happens when she's older
15:14Thank you very much
15:16Thank you very much
15:35I love to spend my time with my dog
15:37And take her out for a walk
15:39Yeah
15:39How do you calm your mind down when you have an overwhelming moment?
15:48I feel like it's a really good question you know
15:53I think I'm still trying to figure that out
15:56I think I'm still trying to find that answer
15:58My brain does get like that a lot
16:00I feel a bit overwhelmed sometimes
16:02And like
16:03If I take my mind off things for too long
16:05That I'm doing something wrong
16:06And I need to be working
16:08And I need to be
16:12For me
16:13For me
16:13I think it's just
16:14Putting everything to the side for a second
16:16And just trying my hardest to sit there
16:18And think about nothing
16:20But
16:21To be totally honest with you
16:22I personally don't have the answer yet
16:25I am in the learning process
16:27Of that
16:28Right now
16:28And I need to take a leaf out of your book
16:30And maybe take my dogs for a walk
16:32And what not
16:32True
16:33Yeah
16:34Is there anyone
16:36You need to say sorry to
16:38And would you like to do it on this show today?
16:41Wow
16:50I'd just like to say sorry
16:52To
16:53Anyone
16:55That was
16:57Heavily
16:57In my life
17:02Before I got really big
17:04And now they're not in my life
17:08Whether that be my fault
17:09Their fault
17:10Someone else's fault
17:11Yeah
17:12Because I do have something called
17:13I think it's called survivor's guilt
17:15I think they call it
17:16Where like
17:17I've got a whole different life
17:19And my friends
17:20I've not seen them for years
17:21And
17:22Are in
17:23Sort of like the same position
17:25As they was ten years ago
17:26And
17:27I do feel a weird way about that sometimes
17:29I kind of wonder
17:31What people I grew up with
17:33Think
17:34Or say
17:34About me
17:36Which makes me feel a little bit weird
17:39Erm
17:43Maybe not everyone even needs an apology
17:45But I just feel the need to say it
17:47To say sorry
17:48To people
17:49Because I hope people don't think that
17:50That
17:51I've turned round
17:52And like
17:53Got a little bit of success
17:55And just went running away on everyone
17:56I didn't
17:57It's just that my life
17:59Has took me
18:00Down a different path
18:01That I would have never experienced
18:03If I just stayed over there
18:05I'm not a
18:06A bad person
18:08So I'd like to think that
18:09Everyone's understanding of that
18:10And
18:12At this point
18:13We're all adults now
18:15And
18:15Everyone's got their own life to live
18:18So yeah
18:21We're gonna hear from Nargis
18:24Hello
18:25You have stinky socks
18:26On top of a mountain
18:27I did have stinky socks
18:29On top of a mountain
18:29Yes I did
18:30Yes I did
18:31They stunk
18:32And
18:33We don't tell anyone
18:35Keep that shit
18:36I done killer Manjaro
18:37And I didn't have a shower
18:38For seven days
18:40You didn't have a shower?
18:41Didn't because I'm such a stinky bastard
18:43Stinky
18:44Oh my god
18:46I've got a tray for you
18:48This for me?
18:49Yes
18:50No it's not
18:50Is it really?
18:51Yeah
18:51Are you being serious?
18:53Yes
18:53Wear it
18:55Wear it
18:56Wear it
18:58Woohoo
19:00Now you're proper
19:01Did you really get this for me though?
19:03You're leaving it
19:04On the back of here
19:05Oh yeah
19:07H the assembly
19:08This is for you
19:09Thank you so much
19:11Thank you
19:11Appreciate it
19:16We are just gonna set up for some music now
19:19What's so great about Manchester?
19:21What's so great about Manchester?
19:23I'm from there
19:24I've got cousins all that way
19:25You've got cousins in Manchester
19:26But it doesn't matter
19:27It doesn't make it great
19:29Everyone's a little bit nicer in Manchester
19:31I was a doctor of your nap
19:40Maybe
19:42I don't really wanna know
19:45How your garden grows
19:47Cause I just wanna fly
19:51Lately
19:53Did you ever feel the pain
19:56In the morning rain
19:59As it slugs you to the bone?
20:03Maybe I will never be
20:06All the things that I wanna be
20:09Now is not the time to cry
20:12Now's the time to find a line
20:15I think you're the same as me
20:17We'd see things they'll never see
20:20You and I are gonna live forever
20:40Maybe I just wanna fly
20:43Want to live
20:44I don't wanna die
20:45Maybe I just wanna breathe
20:48Maybe I just don't believe
20:51Maybe you're the same as me
20:54Maybe you're the same as me
20:54We'd see things they'll never see
20:57You and I are gonna live forever
21:05We're gonna live forever
21:08We're gonna live forever
21:11We're gonna live forever
21:39That was absolutely unreal.
21:41That's made me so happy.
21:42I can't honestly swear to God.
21:43That was amazing.
21:45And why have you all got so good, amazing voices?
21:47I really didn't expect that.
21:48What's going on there?
21:50Do you know what?
21:51Yeah, I'll just be dead honest with everyone.
21:53I have not watched The Assembly before I came here today.
21:56You really should.
21:56Yeah, I should.
21:58You really should.
22:00You can watch it on ITVX and YouTube.
22:02Yeah.
22:06This is, like, the best morning I've had in God knows how long.
22:12Can you show us the handstand, please?
22:14Yeah, handstand.
22:15Yeah, handstand, please.
22:17I thought you would have forgot about that.
22:24Silence, please.
22:27Now, let's build it up.
22:288, 8, 8, 8, 8, 8, 8, 8, 8, 8, 8, 8, 8, 8, 8, 8, 8, 9, 9, 10!
22:43That was freaking good.
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