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Best Movie Of Jennifer Connelly - Career Opportunities [Full Movie] [Official Release]Full EP - Full
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00:05:19How are you doing?
00:05:37You got to fire it again, didn't you?
00:05:39Yeah.
00:05:39Didn't you?
00:05:41Who told you that?
00:05:43Hubie Marshall called me at work.
00:05:45He called you at work?
00:05:47That's it.
00:05:48That's it.
00:05:48Okay.
00:05:48I'm going to have a...
00:05:49I'll speak.
00:05:50What did he say?
00:05:51He said he fired you.
00:05:55And you believe them?
00:05:56Damn straight, I do.
00:05:58All due respect, Dad, you.
00:05:59Mr. Gullible, sometimes.
00:06:03The truth of the matter is, Dad, I resigned.
00:06:06And I'll tell you something else, Dad.
00:06:07Shut up, Jimmy.
00:06:08When I took the job,
00:06:09I had no idea it was going to be a higher fire situation.
00:06:14Luther Bettenhauser's boy's doing much better.
00:06:16What's wrong with him?
00:06:17I'm filling up his grandfather's silo.
00:06:18He's got brain damage.
00:06:20He does not.
00:06:21He does, too.
00:06:22Hoover faces, his tongue's going to hang out the side of his mouth for the rest of his life.
00:06:26And when he dies and they bury him, it's a funeral.
00:06:29They're going to put a mask on him.
00:06:30Do I have to listen to this while I'm eating?
00:06:34Let's talk about something else.
00:06:41Josie McClellan moved to New York.
00:06:43She did not.
00:06:44I just saw her today.
00:06:46Well, I don't know how you could.
00:06:48I heard at the bank that she got tired of taking care of her father and she told him to
00:06:52jump in a lake.
00:06:53And then she left for New York to get her an MBA in high fashion design at the University of
00:06:57New York City.
00:06:58I just saw her down at the gas station in Living Color.
00:07:02We had a cup of java together.
00:07:05Well, I'm going to take Lou Selby's word over yours any day.
00:07:09Lou Selby.
00:07:10Lou Selby's a drunk.
00:07:13You know, for a guy who's just lost his umpteenth job, you sure are handy with the tongue sword.
00:07:17You got canned again?
00:07:19Well, he didn't get canned.
00:07:22You got fired.
00:07:25There's got to be some kind of record.
00:07:31Not only are you an obnoxious slug, but you're a freeloading obnoxious slug.
00:07:36Well, you should talk.
00:07:38What are you, in your mid-40s and still living at home?
00:07:41I'm 24 and I pay rent.
00:07:45So do I.
00:07:46You did pay rent.
00:07:48Dad?
00:07:49You mean you're cutting my rent?
00:07:51Hell no.
00:07:54Not paying rent because you don't have a job.
00:07:55You don't have any money.
00:07:57You're out of school and you live in this house.
00:07:59You pay rent.
00:08:04I want to stay home.
00:08:09I want to stay home right here.
00:08:14I want to stay home today.
00:08:18I want to stay home.
00:08:20I want to stay home.
00:08:21No, Jim.
00:08:21Jim.
00:08:22Wake up.
00:08:24Hey.
00:08:25Jim.
00:08:27It's only six o'clock.
00:08:32When my day begins.
00:08:35You know, getting this job, restoring your faith and pride in me is a number one priority right now, Dan.
00:08:43Priority ought to be making something of yourself.
00:08:46That's right up there.
00:08:47When I was your age, I couldn't wait to get out of my folks' house.
00:08:53I love living at home.
00:09:06I don't think this is such a great place for me to work, Dad.
00:09:12Okay.
00:09:13Say I don't get this job, hypothetically.
00:09:17Are you going to be upset?
00:09:19You don't get this job, you're on a bus to St. Louis.
00:09:22St. Louis?
00:09:23Well, Jeff's offered to put you to work in his garden shop.
00:09:26I don't know anything about gardening.
00:09:28You will learn.
00:09:31I'm getting a distinct feeling that you want me out of your life.
00:09:34I don't want you out of my life.
00:09:36I want you out of my house.
00:09:40Stop!
00:09:41Okay, okay, okay.
00:09:42Shh!
00:09:58Are you sure I can't offer you a coffee and a bear claw?
00:10:02No, thanks.
00:10:03They're very good.
00:10:04They're fresh.
00:10:05No, I'm fine.
00:10:06You don't want one, and I don't need one.
00:10:09Right.
00:10:10I love the darn things, though, I tell you.
00:10:12You know, I've got a sweet tooth.
00:10:14I could eat those things by the dozen, by the looks of what I have.
00:10:17Right, right.
00:10:19I tell you, I'm so excited that you're considering joining the Target team.
00:10:24We all are.
00:10:32We're prepared to offer you $42,500 a year with a full benefit package.
00:10:38That's dental, medical, that's dental, medical, profit-sharing pension, expense account, car allowance, vacation, of course, and any and all
00:10:49relocating expenses.
00:10:51This is our first, best, and last offer.
00:10:54What do you think?
00:10:57Well, a CD.
00:10:59With all due respect, I came in here with the number 45 in my mind, and I...
00:11:29You've got me.
00:11:3245, it is.
00:11:35Welcome aboard.
00:11:38I'd like to buy you lunch.
00:11:39No, no, no, no, no.
00:11:40Your money's no good here.
00:11:41Lunch is mine, all right?
00:11:43I'm not going to argue with you.
00:11:44You better not.
00:11:44I'm bigger than you are.
00:11:47Hang on a second.
00:11:48Well, yeah, I told her to hold my calls.
00:11:49Get it.
00:11:49Yeah, Peg.
00:11:51Uh-huh.
00:11:53No, it's okay.
00:11:55No, he's right here with me now.
00:11:57Hi, Peg.
00:11:58Yeah, we just closed the deal.
00:12:00Uh-huh.
00:12:01Oh, he's a slam dunk, too.
00:12:03Yeah, I got him for 45.
00:12:10No, he's right here.
00:12:14What do you mean he missed the plane?
00:12:19Then who the hell am I talking to?
00:12:24Oh, Lord.
00:12:27I'll, uh...
00:12:28I'll get back to you.
00:12:31I know a great little Italian place
00:12:33that has the best pasta primatones in the world.
00:12:36Excuse me about it, will you, please?
00:12:38Lovely wife you have.
00:12:39Dodge, James?
00:12:42Mm-hmm.
00:12:45James, I'm afraid we have a little misunderstanding here.
00:12:48You see, I-I thought you came in
00:12:50for the, uh, operations manager's job.
00:12:54I have you down here as, uh, night cleanup boy.
00:13:00Well, I'm a little overpaid for night cleanup, boy,
00:13:03wouldn't you say, CD?
00:13:06The truth is, James, I can offer you, uh, $4.44 per hour.
00:13:14Uh, $4, $4, $4.44.
00:13:17$4.44.
00:13:19What about the benefits?
00:13:21Two 15-minute breaks and a half hour for lunch.
00:13:25And the title is, uh, night cleanup boy?
00:13:29Yes.
00:13:33I'll take it.
00:13:35Oh, and, uh, lose the curl.
00:13:39Welcome to the Target team.
00:13:42So the parrot says,
00:13:44of course I can talk.
00:13:45Can you fly?
00:13:50I don't want any damn Japanese automobile plant in this town.
00:13:57It means jobs.
00:14:00I don't need jobs.
00:14:02Your governor's trying to use my town as a political chip.
00:14:05Gentlemen, I resent that.
00:14:06Well, there could be some specific benefits for you personally.
00:14:15Josie!
00:14:19Yeah?
00:14:20Come here.
00:14:21I want you to meet these gentlemen from the governor's office.
00:14:25Come on in here, honey.
00:14:44Honey, I want you to meet, uh, Bill, uh...
00:14:46Bob, uh, Bob, uh, Bob Bozenbeck.
00:14:53Bob.
00:14:56Bob.
00:15:10Dave.
00:15:15I'm pleasure, Dave.
00:15:17Right.
00:15:19Dave Hockner.
00:15:22I don't want to interrupt your meeting.
00:15:25Very nice to meet both of you.
00:15:27Bye.
00:15:29Bye.
00:15:36Josie?
00:15:39Josie!
00:15:48You pull another stunt like you did today,
00:15:51I'll beat the living daylights out of you.
00:16:08You pull another stunt like you did today,
00:16:16I'll beat the...
00:16:18Ohhh!
00:16:20I don't know each other, man.
00:16:22Ah, really?
00:16:24Warm enough!
00:16:25You put it in there,
00:16:26Ow!
00:16:45Right on, Tommy.
00:16:50Everything's going as planned.
00:16:53You ordered a limousine?
00:16:56Of course.
00:16:59My first day of work, I was going to look if my dad drives me.
00:17:03I'll treat myself for getting the job.
00:17:05It's only 50 bucks.
00:17:10Right on time, Henry.
00:17:12Yes, sir.
00:17:13Henry, yes, sir.
00:17:14Very well, sir.
00:17:16Yeah.
00:17:19Now.
00:17:28Hey, Jim.
00:17:29Where are you going?
00:17:31Hello, boys.
00:17:34Going to Paris on an F-14.
00:17:36Got a little peace meeting with the vice president of Bulgaria.
00:17:40Business, you know?
00:17:41Then I'm going to Venice for a big spaghetti dinner with the princess of Austria.
00:17:45Beautiful lady.
00:17:46Really big bones.
00:17:48Remember to brush your teeth, Melvin.
00:17:50You too, Sidney.
00:17:53Happy house.
00:17:56Jim is so cool.
00:18:01Now, listen to the beat.
00:18:02I beat up the song, song.
00:18:03I beat it in my head, head like a bum doll.
00:18:06Listen to the beat.
00:18:07I beat up the song.
00:18:08I beat it in my head, my head like a bum doll.
00:18:11Drinks I checked in through the book and lock won't be flopped.
00:18:13I don't know why the soul won't have it clothed.
00:18:15I sing my song and I'm a rockin'.
00:18:17I beat it in my head, my head like a bum doll.
00:18:19I beat up the beat, beat of the song, song.
00:18:21You're buzzing in my head, head like a bum doll.
00:18:24Listen to the beat, beat, beat of the song.
00:18:26You're buzzing in my head.
00:18:29Tweets and chatted to the boogie light.
00:18:31Tweets and chatted to the boogie light.
00:18:33Tweets and chatted to the boogie light.
00:18:36King.
00:18:37Welcome.
00:18:38Fire.
00:18:40I beat up the song, song.
00:18:42I beat it in my head, my head like a bum doll.
00:18:44Listen to the beat.
00:18:45I beat up the song, song.
00:18:46Got buzzing in my head, my head like a bong-dong
00:18:48We're standing alive with a kick on fire
00:18:51To the kick on jack
00:18:52On the gabinet boogie
00:18:53It's a matter with me
00:18:54It's a matter with me
00:18:55I'm playing like a shaggy
00:18:56I know they talk on a key
00:18:57To the beat, beat of a song song
00:18:59Buzzing in my head, my head like a bong-dong
00:19:01We're listening to the beat, beat, beat of a song song
00:19:04Got buzzing in my head, my head like a bong-dong
00:19:06To the boogie like one big flop
00:19:08Don't know about the soul, one habit clock
00:19:10I sing my song and I'm a rocker
00:19:13Burn it up with a blue ice cream
00:19:15To the beat, beat of a song song
00:19:17Got buzzing in my head, my head like a bong-dong
00:19:19Now we're standing alive with a kick on fire
00:19:22Kick on fire, kick on fire
00:19:23On the gabinet boogie
00:19:24Just standing alive with a kick on fire
00:19:26Kick on fire, kick on fire
00:19:27You've got a loose towel here
00:19:29First thing in the morning I want you to take some epoxy cement
00:19:31And take care of this
00:19:31I don't need a lawsuit, okay?
00:19:34I've got enough to worry about
00:19:38Who is he?
00:19:39Attention shoppers, the store will be closing in five minutes
00:19:43Please bring all your purchases to the front of the room
00:19:45Thank you
00:19:46Thank you
00:20:06Listen to the beat
00:20:07Listen to the beat
00:20:25Are you a slacker?
00:20:29Uh, no, Presbyterian
00:20:31What did you say?
00:20:32What did you say?
00:20:33Now I'm asking you a simple question
00:20:35Are you lazy?
00:20:36No, sir
00:20:37Because the last guy that wore that uniform was a lazy slacker
00:20:40And I fired his no good butt
00:20:44Uh, about the uniform
00:20:46Will I be getting my own?
00:20:48You work out, which I doubt
00:20:50You could have yourself a new name patch
00:20:57Would I be able to have it laundered?
00:20:59It smells a little bit like Darnell
00:21:01I don't think you know who you're messing with, boy
00:21:04All right, after you clean the ladies and the men's crappers
00:21:07And I'm talking about
00:21:07You better be able to eat off those bowls
00:21:09Oh, sure
00:21:09You clean my coffee maker
00:21:11Then you wax my desk
00:21:12Uh, now, clean what?
00:21:14You clean my coffee maker
00:21:16And wax my desk
00:21:17Oh, yes, I got it
00:21:18You sweep the aisles
00:21:19Starting with health and beauty
00:21:20And you work your way over to juniors and misses
00:21:22Ups and downs
00:21:23Leaving you debris in the cross aisles
00:21:25So I start with health and beauty
00:21:27What did I just say?
00:21:28I just said you start with health and beauty, okay?
00:21:30Then you do your cross aisles
00:21:31That'll bring your dustbin into play
00:21:33You take the debris
00:21:34You load it into the dustbin
00:21:36You take the dustbin
00:21:37Out to the load and dock area
00:21:38And you empty it into the receptacle
00:21:40Huh?
00:21:41You got that?
00:21:41Yeah
00:21:42Easy as pie, huh?
00:21:43When I was in blood for a brief period of Del Taco
00:21:45I really don't care about your Del Taco experience
00:21:48All right, now, we got this little problem
00:21:50In this store with grazers
00:21:51You know what a grazer is, boy?
00:21:52Uh, is that some sort of farm truck?
00:21:55A grazer is a customer
00:21:56Or an employee that eats off the shelves, okay?
00:21:58Sort of similar to a cow
00:22:00Grazing in a field of grass
00:22:01Mm-hmm
00:22:01Only this isn't a field of grass, okay?
00:22:03And you're not a cow
00:22:03There's no eating
00:22:05You're not being paid to eat, so don't
00:22:06You got any questions?
00:22:08Uh, not right offhand, no
00:22:09You think you can handle it?
00:22:11Oh, I'll give it the old college try
00:22:12Don't touch me!
00:22:16Well, despite our age difference
00:22:17I think I'm really gonna enjoy working with you
00:22:19Let's get something straight, boy
00:22:20You ain't working with me
00:22:21You're working for me
00:22:22Well, still
00:22:23I think it's gonna be fun being around you
00:22:25Yeah, well, I'm gonna be anywhere near you
00:22:27I'm gonna be home pumping the pasties
00:22:29At, uh, Colleen Jackson
00:22:30You're not gonna be here?
00:22:31Hell no
00:22:34I'm gonna be here by myself?
00:22:38Yeah, that's right
00:22:39And you better stay out of the ladies' undergoods
00:22:43Wait a minute
00:22:44Nobody told me that I would be here alone
00:22:46What are you doing?
00:22:48Saving money
00:22:49Wait a minute
00:22:50You're turning off the lights?
00:22:51The 25 seconds you got light in every third aisle
00:22:53When the sun comes up
00:22:55You turn off all the lights
00:22:56You understand?
00:22:57No, no
00:22:57I don't understand
00:22:58Just hold on a second
00:23:00I'm locking you in
00:23:02When I come back at 7
00:23:03Open up
00:23:04I'll let you out
00:23:07You're locking me in?
00:23:09What, you take me for a fool?
00:23:11Nobody gets a set of keys on their first night
00:23:13Nobody
00:23:14Now get to work
00:23:17What if there's a fire?
00:23:18Then the fire department'll come
00:23:20I could perish
00:23:22Boo
00:23:23You can't do this
00:23:24A locked inn
00:23:25A loan
00:23:25In the dark
00:23:26What was that a part of my employment agreement?
00:23:35What if there's a fire department?
00:24:18You got to wash with the crocodile in the river
00:24:22You got to swim with the sharks in the sea
00:24:27You got to live with the crook and the politician
00:24:31Trust those things that you can never see
00:24:34Oh yeah, yeah, yeah
00:24:36This is funny
00:24:37Oh yeah, yeah
00:24:38Ah yeah, yeah
00:24:40This is funny
00:24:41Oh yeah, yeah
00:24:42Money
00:24:51It's a cool, crazy, beautiful world
00:24:55Every day you wake up
00:24:58I hope it's a blue, blue sky
00:25:03It's a cool, crazy, beautiful world
00:25:08One day in the world, I won't let you say goodbye
00:25:16Say goodbye
00:25:23It's your last name, goodbye
00:25:27It's your last name
00:25:469.17
00:25:48Time for a break
00:26:17Hello?
00:26:22Anybody out there?
00:26:24When I accepted the post of President Gran Puba of Target
00:26:31Realizing that I have brought
00:26:35Meaningfulness and peace and happiness into the lives of thousands of people
00:26:40Jim Dodge from Monroe
00:26:42Top moneymaker on the tour
00:26:44His father's here today, Bud Dodge
00:26:46And Sister Penny, sad, sad story
00:26:49Was just admitted to University Hospital
00:26:52While trying to pop a zit, her head
00:26:54Mysteriously exploded
00:27:21Dad, hi
00:27:22Jim, do you know what time it is?
00:27:24You know, I started to think about Christmas
00:27:27Like gifts
00:27:28Because, you know, I'm in a store, a big store
00:27:29And I'm starting to get a lot of gift ideas
00:27:32Hi
00:27:33Mom
00:27:33Hi
00:27:34How's it going?
00:27:36Well, I finished all my janitor stuff
00:27:38I've finished most of it
00:27:39I've got to save some stuff for later
00:27:41But it's easy
00:27:42Um, honey
00:27:44It's a little late
00:27:46Yeah, it is kind of late
00:27:48Well, sleep tight
00:27:50See you in the morning
00:27:51Love you too
00:27:57Mr. James Dodge
00:28:07Watch
00:28:08Hey
00:28:11Hey
00:28:13Hey
00:28:23Hey
00:28:25Hey
00:28:25Hey
00:28:31Let's go.
00:28:57I can't be as happy as a night clean-up, boy.
00:29:04Sweetheart, he wants us to call him a janitor.
00:29:10Maybe I should have spent less time harping and more time helping.
00:29:15Harping on him to help him what?
00:29:19Harping on him to leave and helping him become a good, mature, productive person he could be.
00:29:35Harping on him to leave and helping him become a good, mature, productive person he could be.
00:29:56Yeah!
00:29:59Yeah!
00:30:01Yeah!
00:30:08Yeah!
00:30:25Yeah!
00:30:30Yeah!
00:30:44Yeah!
00:30:46Yeah!
00:30:46Yeah!
00:30:46Yeah!
00:30:48Yeah!
00:30:52Yeah!
00:30:56Yeah!
00:30:57all right yes I'm fine thanks and you what are you doing here I work here
00:31:19well so she didn't leave on the bus apparently she isn't here let's go look
00:31:23for her someplace else she wouldn't be dumb enough to thumb would she does she have any friends that
00:31:29she might have run off with boyfriend would you just get in the car so we can go look for
00:31:36the
00:31:36girl please I'm tired I had to get out of the bed I have any coffee I don't feel good
00:31:41my daughter
00:31:42I don't know where the hell she is you're standing by the car there sounding like some goddamn preacher
00:31:46or something come on get the car prick are you sure you didn't hurt yourself oh no I'm kidding
00:32:01no I'm fine can I ask what you were doing uh oh I was roller skating I know but why
00:32:09oh why not
00:32:11get bored one thing led to another and I'm roller skating in my shorts better question would be what
00:32:20are you doing here shopping uh well we've been closed for five hours yeah I fell asleep while
00:32:28shopping no in the ladies dressing room that makes no sense you're a high-profile young ingenue I was
00:32:35debating what whether or not to get arrested for shoplifting doesn't your father own like 10
00:32:41million dollars worth of real estate in this town well it's not my fault no no I didn't imply such
00:32:47it
00:32:47just seems funny that someone of your wealth if you will would be shoplifting I didn't do it
00:32:54I chickened out would consider shoplifting it's a long dull self-indulgent highly unromantic story
00:33:03about overbearing father deceased mother and brother and a completely confused girl looks a little like me
00:33:49I sure am glad you dropped by I was getting pretty tired of being with myself
00:33:58I guess uh I guess I'm what you call a people person
00:34:05what are you cooking uh hobo chicken it's a glazed chicken and wine sauce with uh vegetables and skin
00:34:11on potatoes silverware silverware silverware it's only 210 calories and I don't know if you're watching
00:34:22your figure but I sure am uh if you could just grab a serving spoon over there I think we'll
00:34:27be set
00:34:34uh keep your distance from these things I think it's safe to keep five feet
00:34:43I think they're about done
00:34:48well Donningham's right this way
00:34:53hmm
00:34:55hmm
00:34:57oh I think my father poured the cement for your pool
00:35:02he's a cement contractor good man bud dodge my mother works at the hanukkahs over christmas part-time
00:35:11my sister is a teller at the bank my brother's in grade school he's not employed at the moment
00:35:16I used to work at the animal shelter but I was terminated and uh now I'm working here
00:35:31I was thinking maybe we should go into sales I've actually tried that
00:35:46some fresh brown pepper please
00:35:53some people don't like a lot of pepper say one that's fine
00:35:57um I happen to really like it a lot I think it enhances the natural flavor of the chicken
00:36:06I hope you don't take this the wrong way
00:36:10I've had dreams about you
00:36:12you've had dreams about me
00:36:16well not recently
00:36:17I've had dreams about you in the past
00:36:19I mean I've had dreams about an entire cheerleading
00:36:22so don't get me wrong
00:36:24I mean it's kid stuff you know
00:36:25how about you
00:36:26do I dream
00:36:30it's about all I do
00:36:46raising a kid's hard work
00:36:48you got any kids
00:36:50no sir
00:36:50no sir
00:36:51and from listening to you talk
00:36:52and from observing this
00:36:54I'm kind of grateful
00:36:56that old Emily turned up infertile
00:37:15shouldn't you be cleaning up the store
00:37:18I got plenty of time
00:37:20big store
00:37:22huge
00:37:24always smoke cigars
00:37:27I enjoy a good one after a fine meal
00:37:30settles the stomach
00:37:33you're the town liar right
00:37:40what
00:37:41I'm sorry
00:37:41that
00:37:42that really came out wrong
00:37:45something like that could come up right
00:37:47I guess I meant that's what people call you
00:37:48but I'd mean to imply that it's actually true
00:37:50people actually calling me that
00:37:50I thought you knew
00:37:52no what
00:37:53that I was a town liar
00:37:54you didn't
00:37:55no I'm not
00:37:56I think you might have the wrong information
00:37:58I didn't mean to offend you
00:38:00do you think that was a compliment
00:38:02no
00:38:02no
00:38:03and I apologize
00:38:04you know I just
00:38:04I can't repeat things like that
00:38:07don't
00:38:07think about it
00:38:08it's all right
00:38:09as I said I think you've gotten the wrong information
00:38:12but if people are calling me that
00:38:13it's only because they're small
00:38:15cheap
00:38:15petty
00:38:16and jealous
00:38:16small towns
00:38:17notorious for that kind of thing
00:38:18oh yeah
00:38:19I'm sure there's a word for me
00:38:20sure
00:38:21what do they call me
00:38:23there's tease
00:38:24tease
00:38:27yeah
00:38:28I can see that
00:38:31actually
00:38:32I never teased
00:38:33this is
00:38:34it's becoming amusing
00:38:36but who exactly
00:38:37calls me a liar
00:38:39everybody
00:38:40everybody
00:38:40no not everybody
00:38:41I'm sure there's some old people in town
00:38:43right
00:38:51what do you think
00:38:53what do I think
00:38:56do you think
00:38:57I'm a liar
00:38:57oh
00:38:58I don't know you well enough
00:39:02you know me for
00:39:02almost 17 years
00:39:04we went to the same schools
00:39:05from kindergarten on up
00:39:06I knew of you
00:39:07but I didn't know you
00:39:08personally
00:39:10that's always bothered me
00:39:12I mean that old
00:39:14in out
00:39:15us them
00:39:15thing
00:39:16it's the way it's always been
00:39:17I know
00:39:17it's always bothered me
00:39:18I'll tell you
00:39:19sure
00:39:19but it's water over the dam now
00:39:22yeah
00:39:22but it's your dam
00:39:23and my water
00:39:24I got crapped on
00:39:25a lot of years
00:39:26I just meant that
00:39:27it's in the past
00:39:28well
00:39:29the present is a result
00:39:30of the past
00:39:31I look at my high school yearbook
00:39:33and I don't see
00:39:34four fabulous years
00:39:37actually
00:39:37what I'm reminded of
00:39:38is what it feels like
00:39:39to have my underwear
00:39:40yanked up my ass
00:39:41by some big football player
00:39:42with arms like telephone
00:39:43poles
00:39:43okay
00:39:44and where are those guys now
00:39:47I know they're not
00:39:48working nights at Target
00:39:49I'll tell you that
00:39:52yeah
00:39:53you know
00:39:55I look at my yearbook
00:39:57and I see
00:39:58four
00:39:59fabulous years
00:40:01that are gonna be
00:40:02the highlight of my life
00:40:04here's what it's like
00:40:06first
00:40:06you feel a hand
00:40:08going down the back
00:40:08of your pants
00:40:09and tighten around
00:40:10the elastic waistband
00:40:11and then
00:40:12highlight
00:40:12you know
00:40:13sometimes I'd actually
00:40:13see stars
00:40:14not gonna get any better
00:40:15and if I was
00:40:16particularly unlucky
00:40:17my shorts
00:40:19like
00:40:19ripped completely free
00:40:21and I would get this
00:40:21really drastic fabric
00:40:23do you hear me
00:40:27yeah
00:40:31I don't really care
00:40:32about a graphic description
00:40:33of a childhood prank
00:40:35hey that prank
00:40:36was a motif in my life
00:40:41you know
00:40:42I'm
00:40:42locked in this store here
00:40:45because I didn't have
00:40:46the guts to steal a skirt
00:40:48so I could get arrested
00:40:49and embarrass my father
00:40:51in this
00:40:52stupid
00:40:52desperate
00:40:53childish
00:40:54pathetic attempt
00:40:54to leave home
00:40:57when you have
00:40:57your underwear
00:40:58yanked up your ass
00:40:59I have my entire
00:40:59life
00:41:00yanked up my ass
00:41:03well
00:41:04you were speaking
00:41:05figuratively
00:41:05I was speaking
00:41:06literally
00:41:06and you're happy
00:41:07you know
00:41:08you're happy
00:41:10I'm not happy
00:41:11I'm working nights
00:41:14everybody thinks
00:41:15I'm a liar
00:41:15my whole family
00:41:17is laughing at me
00:41:17Reverend Harwell
00:41:18gave me the finger
00:41:19last week
00:41:20okay
00:41:20you're not happy
00:41:21but at least you have
00:41:21some control
00:41:22over your life
00:41:23so do you
00:41:23my father controls
00:41:24my life
00:41:25you're over 18
00:41:27tell him to drop dead
00:41:28and get on a plane
00:41:29so can you
00:41:30I don't want to
00:41:33I like living at home
00:41:35no you don't
00:41:37what am I
00:41:38a garden snail
00:41:40an involuntary muscle
00:41:41in a janitor suit
00:41:42I know what I want to do
00:41:45what could you possibly like
00:41:47about living at home
00:41:47at your age
00:41:49the meals
00:41:50are great
00:41:51there's the
00:41:52there's cable
00:41:55the accommodations
00:41:56are excellent
00:41:57five star
00:41:57what do you care
00:41:59if I'm living at home
00:41:59or not
00:42:01hey
00:42:01I didn't come here
00:42:03to irritate you
00:42:04well
00:42:04you're beginning to
00:42:09great
00:42:10it's really great
00:42:11I gotta stop saying
00:42:13those kinds of things
00:42:13really
00:42:15those freaking kids
00:42:16I knew I couldn't
00:42:17trust them
00:42:17town liar
00:42:19nice wreck
00:42:20nice wreck
00:42:20I bet it was Gregory
00:42:21that little weasel
00:42:22top secret
00:42:23top secret I tell
00:42:24and they still
00:42:25shoot off their mouths
00:42:26if I had really been
00:42:27a French spy
00:42:28those little tots
00:42:29would have gotten me killed
00:42:31piano wire wrapped around my neck
00:42:32my testicles shoved down my throat
00:42:34piece of dynamite
00:42:35stuck up my ass
00:42:42she's so beautiful
00:42:46and I'm the town liar
00:42:47I'm the town liar
00:43:06I'm the town liar
00:43:14Fell in love on a summer day
00:43:22You're only here once, but that's alright
00:43:29Because it's just so good to be alive
00:43:37Take away your troubles, take away your troubles
00:43:41Nothing on my mind except my new love
00:43:49Nothing on my mind except my new love
00:43:59Shalalalalalalala
00:44:03Shalalalalalalala
00:44:30Jim
00:44:33There's no reason to lie right now
00:44:36There's no one to impress
00:44:38Anyway, I'm not impressed by a man telling me he likes living at home
00:44:42Excuse me, I'm not lying
00:44:45And I'm not trying to impress you
00:44:47So if you'll excuse me, I have work to do
00:44:49I have to clean dead flies out of the lighting fixtures
00:44:52Okay, okay, my error, I apologize
00:44:54It's just that I can't imagine a man
00:44:59Giving up his independence, his right to mate
00:45:03To have a family
00:45:05To have children, to build a life for himself
00:45:08For good cooking
00:45:10Hold on
00:45:10I have not given up my right to mate
00:45:14Okay
00:45:14I have the right to mate
00:45:16Anytime
00:45:18I feel like mating
00:45:20You go out with someone
00:45:21You bring her home
00:45:24You introduce her to
00:45:25Mom
00:45:26Dad
00:45:27Sis
00:45:28Billy
00:45:30Woofie's dog
00:45:30Cocktails in the rumpus room
00:45:32And then
00:45:33Do it on the bunk bed
00:45:35Oh
00:45:37Let's analyze that remark
00:45:39For
00:45:40I don't have a dog
00:45:41My brother's not named Billy
00:45:43And I don't even have a rumpus room
00:45:46So I don't even
00:45:46You know what I mean
00:45:53Yeah
00:45:54I know what you mean
00:45:57Spit on me
00:45:57Make me feel lousy
00:46:05Jim
00:46:08You said something that wasn't true
00:46:11No
00:46:13No, I said that I can have sex when I want to
00:46:18And I do
00:46:18I do
00:46:20However, I was looking forward to a nice quiet evening of janitoring
00:46:26I don't think you see what I'm getting at
00:46:29I see what you're getting at
00:46:30I'm a lying monk
00:46:32With an oedipus complex
00:46:33And an appetite for home cooking
00:46:34Don't forget
00:46:35You're the indecisive shop
00:46:36Yes!
00:46:37Exactly!
00:46:38I would do anything to be in your shoes
00:46:41These are Darnell's shoes
00:46:43You know what?
00:46:44You have freedom and you're not using it
00:46:47It makes me sad
00:46:49Well you have the collective wealth of the entire town
00:46:52And you're trying to get yourself arrested
00:46:53Now that makes me sad
00:46:55It makes me sad too
00:46:57That's pretty stupid
00:46:58It's very stupid
00:47:00Are you serious?
00:47:03I mean...
00:47:04You haven't been drinking?
00:47:05Just in the bottle talking?
00:47:07No
00:47:09Well then why don't you just talk to the guy?
00:47:14For the same reason that you can't leave home
00:47:17I can't tell my father to go to hell
00:47:21Why not?
00:47:22Why not?
00:47:26Because...
00:47:27I don't want to be alone
00:47:52I don't want to be alone
00:47:56Mr. McLellan
00:47:59Do you ever have any family problems, you and your daughter?
00:48:03What the hell do you think this is?
00:48:07I got a point
00:48:14would you go with me somewhere
00:48:19where florida wyoming spain it doesn't really matter just away somewhere
00:48:27i'd love to know i just can't afford to be capricious and carefree like yourself i i
00:48:35gotta set my sights on something and really go for it my janitor it's a beginning i i'm looking at
00:48:43it's an end maybe if you had like a destination in mind you know that that would make all the
00:48:51difference in the world why well i'm i'm just not built to aimlessly roam the world i'm i'm i'm too
00:49:01conservative for that well i was thinking about los angeles what for live work at what whatever
00:49:18and what about your father when i don't die he'll realize that i can make it on my own
00:49:27if i do i'll have the satisfaction of knowing that i can't if i run and he brings me back
00:49:32or
00:49:33if i go back on my own either way he's just trying to beat the shit out of me so
00:49:36it doesn't really
00:49:37make a difference what literally
00:49:43yeah
00:49:45sad
00:49:47yeah it's sad until he throws you across the room it's sad
00:49:52i'm just afraid to live with him i'm afraid to live without you know
00:49:55you didn't come to work to hear this stuff i'm really sorry
00:50:10i'm just surprised you know i thought everything was okay you know i figured you got a nice car
00:50:15you got a nice house you got some money everything's okay you know it should be
00:50:20but it's not it's twisted and it's distorted and it can't be changed and it cannot be saved
00:50:34i'll go with you
00:50:40really
00:50:43yeah
00:50:46we have to get a car
00:50:49let's get through the night first
00:50:51i have money
00:50:52how much
00:50:5352 000
00:50:58on you
00:51:01in my purse
00:51:15nine
00:51:1652 000
00:51:17wow
00:51:19i've never seen so much money in my life
00:51:22that's more than my house costs
00:51:25jim
00:51:27now that i'm spending the night
00:51:29how can i pay you back for being so cold to you in high school
00:51:36do you need an answer right away or
00:51:38no
00:51:41sometime before the sun comes up
00:51:46well uh
00:51:48you're probably not going to remember this
00:51:50but uh
00:51:53there was a homecoming dance our sophomore year
00:51:57do you remember mrs noble
00:51:59large
00:52:00hairy
00:52:01gym teacher
00:52:02suspiciously cumbersome groin bulge
00:52:04i had her for two years
00:52:06well she made everybody switch partners because all the fat girls were dancing together
00:52:08and and all the doinks myself included
00:52:10were standing against the wall blowing spit bubbles
00:52:12right
00:52:14well
00:52:14for uh
00:52:16three quarters
00:52:17of one verse of a slow song
00:52:21we we danced together
00:52:24you reeked of stridex
00:52:26oh no that was larry fry
00:52:29i'm sorry
00:52:32i i don't remember
00:52:35you got your hair caught in my braces
00:52:38i don't remember
00:52:39well it's not it's not important
00:52:43i had
00:52:45well i i just always
00:52:48dreamed of finishing that dance
00:52:53okay
00:52:57oh don't don't feel you have to answer right away
00:53:00i mean
00:53:00i mean
00:53:01it's just a small portion of my life that's incomplete
00:53:04i thought you were going to say something different
00:53:16first things first
00:53:33when things go wrong
00:53:38as they sometimes will
00:53:41when the road you're trotting seems all uphill
00:53:50when the funds are low
00:53:55and the debts are high
00:53:58and you want to smile
00:54:00but you have your side
00:54:07when care
00:54:09is pressing you down a bit
00:54:13rest if you're mine
00:54:20but don't you quit
00:54:25oh no
00:54:29don't you quit
00:54:33oh no
00:54:51but you never can tell
00:54:54how close you are
00:54:58you may be near
00:55:01when it seems so far
00:55:22you're too harsh there
00:55:34you're too harsh there
00:55:47aww
00:55:49aww
00:56:22Officer Don, you scared the crap out of me, I thought it was the custodian.
00:56:28Jim, what are you doing in there?
00:56:30I work here now.
00:56:37You want to let me in?
00:56:39I'd love to let you in. I don't have the keys.
00:56:43I'm locked in here till 7 a.m.
00:56:45What's going on?
00:56:47Have you seen Josie McClellan?
00:56:50Of course.
00:56:52Uh, dark hair, green eyes, beautiful.
00:56:57Oh, yeah, of course.
00:56:58You seen her recently?
00:57:00Oh, uh, matter of fact, I just saw her yesterday, yeah.
00:57:05We had a cup of java together.
00:57:07She come into the store?
00:57:09Oh, I don't know. I only work nights. Why?
00:57:14Well, she's missing.
00:57:16Now, I was looking around this side of town for her, and I come past, and I seen that the
00:57:22outside sign's on. The outside sign's never on.
00:57:26Oh, yeah, yeah.
00:57:28Did you try the library? Because, you know, maybe she fell asleep reading.
00:57:33No. She's probably just screwing somebody the old man don't approve of.
00:57:44Would you know that if the custodian comes by to check up on people?
00:57:50Oh, no, I wouldn't think he'd do that, Jimmy.
00:57:54I feel pretty good now.
00:58:05I'm sorry, sir. I had to practice a little therapy.
00:58:10The boy's in his own world.
00:58:19The boy's in his own world.
00:58:39The good looks like a baby.
00:58:41Where are you, baby?
00:58:43We used to have so much fun.
00:58:45You drive me crazy.
00:58:47Somebody tell me where he's going.
00:58:49Where are you, baby?
00:58:50We used to have so much fun.
00:58:52You drive me crazy.
00:58:55You've been through the window.
00:58:57This is too much for me to handle.
00:58:59Already caused a scandal.
00:59:01A disturbance like a banjo.
00:59:03I've lost track of all time.
00:59:04Cause you're always on my mind.
00:59:06And you're just back down for God.
00:59:08That will make me cry.
00:59:09Oh, why? Oh, why? Oh, why? Oh, why? Oh, why?
00:59:11That's disappeared.
00:59:12This feeling is really weird.
00:59:14You're free to send me dear.
00:59:15Can you feel it?
00:59:18Where are you, baby?
00:59:20We used to have so much fun.
00:59:22You drive me crazy.
00:59:23Somebody tell me where he's going.
00:59:25Where are you, baby?
00:59:27We used to have so much fun.
00:59:29You drive me crazy.
00:59:54You drive me crazy.
00:59:56You drive me crazy.
00:59:58You drive me crazy.
01:00:00You drive me crazy.
01:00:01You drive me crazy.
01:00:02You drive me crazy.
01:00:02You drive me crazy.
01:00:31Ah!
01:00:45Why don't we get underneath the bench?
01:00:50Do you want to get on top?
01:01:00You check the office, I'll scope the dressing room.
01:01:02Great.
01:01:12You're on top.
01:01:16Did you want to be on top?
01:01:18Oh, no. No, no, I'm just fine right where I am. Sure.
01:01:33I'm just fine.
01:01:43I'm just fine.
01:02:02I think he went to the back.
01:02:04I'm just fine.
01:02:34I'm a missing person. The whole town is looking for me.
01:02:38What, are you hiding now?
01:02:40Yes. And I would appreciate it if you would let us sit up.
01:02:44What about the tattoo?
01:02:46I don't have one.
01:02:48You owe me a buck.
01:02:50Actually, it's a two-nine bar that went off to yesterday at Burger King.
01:02:54Excuse me.
01:02:57Are you planning to shoot us in the back of the head?
01:03:00We haven't decided yet, have we?
01:03:04Who are you?
01:03:07Uh, you don't want to know.
01:03:09They wouldn't have asked you if you didn't want to know, butthead.
01:03:11He's a little crazy.
01:03:12He's my brother.
01:03:13He's not quite right.
01:03:14That's not true.
01:03:15She doesn't even know me.
01:03:17Somebody better start talking straight.
01:03:19This is the truth.
01:03:20Okay.
01:03:24You want to know?
01:03:27Mm-hmm.
01:03:28Okay, good.
01:03:29Uh, but, uh...
01:03:32Come on over here.
01:03:35What?
01:03:36Come on over.
01:03:37Come on over here.
01:03:39Over here.
01:03:40Over here.
01:04:01This way, down here.
01:04:03Down here.
01:04:04Down here.
01:04:06Okay.
01:04:09You dumb sons of bitches.
01:04:12Do you realize that you have just walked straight into a $60 million drug transaction?
01:04:22so you're running this multi-zillion dollar drug transaction by yourself little target boy
01:04:30no no i i'm not doing it by myself i'm not as a matter of fact
01:04:39in about 10 minutes this place is gonna be alive with the meanest ugliest most impatient animals
01:04:47you guys have ever seen so i'll tell you what i'll give you five minutes to take whatever you want
01:04:52the whole store anything you want and just go i won't tell just go just take your guns and go
01:04:57scoot
01:04:58okay then who's the girl
01:05:02i'm his hostage yes yes yes is that true
01:05:10yes yes it's true and um
01:05:17if the deal doesn't go down she becomes a pig deed
01:05:20bullshit oh really
01:05:27we'll blow her away
01:05:28come on that's bullshit
01:05:31okay
01:05:34then give me your guns
01:05:36and i'll do it for you
01:05:39it's bullshit right
01:05:42we'll see
01:05:45roll over
01:05:46yeah
01:05:47yeah come on you heard it
01:05:48what
01:05:49roll over
01:05:49that's right you too honey
01:05:51you heard me roll over
01:05:52come on do it
01:05:53come on come on come on
01:05:54roll roll
01:05:55thank you
01:05:55very nice
01:05:57mmm
01:05:59yeah
01:06:00um
01:06:02give me the guns
01:06:04no way man
01:06:06uh-uh
01:06:06fine fine fine you you do it i i don't need her anymore anyway
01:06:12i only need you to get the customs
01:06:13i don't like this
01:06:15this sucks it's not worth it
01:06:16come on we don't have much time do it
01:06:19all right
01:06:23it's nothing personal
01:06:25it's too late they're here
01:06:27it's too late
01:06:28come on come here
01:06:28it's too late
01:06:29it's too late they're here
01:06:30then hold your fire
01:06:32hold your fire
01:06:33hold your fire
01:06:33head and housewares hold your fire
01:06:35tiny exporting goods hold your fire
01:06:36then hold your fire
01:06:38there are infrared scopes
01:06:39trained on your head
01:06:40we didn't want this
01:06:41we didn't want this
01:06:42the girl you want not us
01:06:43just relax
01:06:44okay dad we got a wd-40
01:06:46that's where the full scale pms
01:06:47okay
01:06:47okay everybody just relax
01:06:49now now
01:06:50okay everybody
01:06:50everybody just relax
01:06:52okay the whole place is gonna blow
01:06:53everybody just relax
01:06:54now put down your guns
01:06:56put the guns down
01:06:56now they're putting down the guns
01:06:58they're putting
01:06:58are you putting them down
01:06:59they're putting them now
01:06:59now get down
01:07:00because lives are at stake here
01:07:01now get back
01:07:07spread the legs
01:07:08okay
01:07:11put the dogs down
01:07:12put the dogs down
01:07:13both of them
01:07:14the dogs down
01:07:14that was great
01:07:19i got a big surprise for you guys
01:07:21we have a bit of a surprise for you too
01:07:37I got an idea. How about a truce? I'm full of shit, you're full of shit. I think everybody
01:07:45at one time in their life is full of shit. I'll throw in a couple of corndogs and we'll
01:07:49all get to know each other. I like to know what goes on inside your heads. Okay, you had
01:07:53the big one and you had the big one. I lied. These are the men that killed that guy in
01:08:11Saltburg.
01:08:13I'm fairly sure that we're going to die. I just want to tell you how disappointed I am
01:08:17that we're not going to get to go to California together. We're not dead yet. Pretty darn close.
01:08:23No, if I can get them to take me with them, maybe I can get away and then come back
01:08:29for
01:08:29you. I mean, don't forget, we do need a car and they obviously have one. Just go along
01:08:36with whatever I do, okay? So what's the word on you two? Are you married? Obviously you're
01:08:56going to hack crooks if you can't pull off a discount store job. What were you planning
01:09:02to steal? A little hairspray? Sorry.
01:09:14Lady, you got a job? No.
01:09:19Well, then don't knock ours. Crime isn't a job, it's a sickness.
01:09:23Yes. Whoops. Anyone have some change?
01:09:44You look like a lady in need of a quarter.
01:09:47I think I might need more than just a quarter.
01:09:52You know? You and I can make a lot of money.
01:09:56Hey, honey, me and Nestor, we're partners. Okay? We don't need us there.
01:10:01You don't know what you need, so why don't you just shut up?
01:10:07Hop on.
01:10:25Now. Let's go now.
01:10:31You know what you are?
01:10:33Yeah.
01:10:33You are one good-looking ball of trouble.
01:10:39Good.
01:10:51Go!
01:10:59Go!
01:11:18What do you think, for the car?
01:11:21No, no, no, the whole thing.
01:11:23We'll just lay it down in the back.
01:11:24We've got multi-site capabilities.
01:11:26Think of the sound.
01:11:33Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
01:11:55Let me just tell you, I'm not helping you load your car.
01:11:58I think it's in, boy.
01:12:00And you're not going to take the stolen merchandise out of the store.
01:12:03No, no, I'm not going to let you.
01:12:05No, I'm not going to let you.
01:12:06It's stolen, all of it.
01:12:08Give me that. Give me that. No.
01:12:09It's mine. Give it to me.
01:12:11It's mine.
01:12:18Wait a minute.
01:12:22You're not going with them.
01:12:24Yeah.
01:12:26You'll be an accessory.
01:12:29So?
01:12:31So?
01:12:32You don't know anything about them.
01:12:34You certainly don't know anything about him.
01:12:35These are hardened criminals here.
01:12:38That's enough, Gil.
01:12:43Don't waste your time. You could get a hernia.
01:12:45You know, if my foot could talk,
01:12:48it would say, may I please go up this geek's ass?
01:12:51Forget him.
01:12:51Come on.
01:12:51Forget him.
01:12:52All right, forget him.
01:12:53He's no use to us.
01:12:54After all, the guy's built like an oyster.
01:12:56Listen, little mister.
01:13:00If you're telling us,
01:13:02I'll kill you.
01:13:09Fine.
01:13:16Jim.
01:13:26Don't be an ass.
01:13:30Okay, Jimbo.
01:13:35Let's go.
01:13:36Shall we?
01:13:38Let's go.
01:13:41Let's go.
01:14:03All right.
01:14:05Let's go.
01:14:07Come on, come on, come on.
01:14:21Oh, okay.
01:14:25Okay. Okay.
01:14:27I got him. I got him. I got him. I got him.
01:14:36I got him.
01:15:07I got him.
01:15:11I got him.
01:15:14Let's go.
01:15:21Come on.
01:15:22Oh, my God.
01:15:53That wasn't a store robbery.
01:15:55That was an assassination.
01:15:58That wasn't a clerk. That was a wise guy.
01:16:00How do I know?
01:16:03I spent a little time with the FBI's organized crime unit.
01:16:06I guess you could say that I'm intimately knowledgeable of the seedy and rancorous workings of the mob in the
01:16:10Midwest section of this country.
01:16:13Let me just say, I know a gangland slang when I see one, and that's exactly what this baby is.
01:16:19I look into myself personally, but, uh, get a date tonight.
01:16:32Attention, target shoppers.
01:16:35I look into myself.
01:17:20Damn!
01:17:23Damn!
01:17:28Let's go.
01:18:00Let's go.
01:18:23Let's go.
01:19:23Let's go.
01:19:24It's not because I'm really easy to please.
01:19:27It's not the way you bring me down on my knees.
01:19:31It's just a feeling but it keeps coming back.
01:19:34It's a tiny little heart attack.
01:20:01It's not because I'm really easy to please.
01:20:04It's not the way you bring me down on my knees.
01:20:08It's just a feeling but it keeps coming back.
01:20:11It's a tiny little heart attack.
01:20:14It's just a tiny little heart attack.
01:20:19It's a tiny little heart attack.
01:20:48Got a snake skin suit that I really like
01:20:52Looking like the devil on a Friday night
01:20:55Got a shark outside in a swimming pool
01:20:59But there won't be trouble if you're staying cool
01:21:02Got my mind made up that I'm leaving you
01:21:05But it won't be easy, no, it won't be untrue
01:21:09Oh, oh, oh, oh
01:21:39Got a snake skin suit that I really like
01:21:43Looking like the devil on a Friday night
01:21:46Got a shark outside in a swimming pool
01:21:50But there won't be trouble if you're staying cool
01:21:53Got my mind made up that I'm leaving you
01:21:56But it won't be easy, no, it won't be untrue
01:22:00I'll never make it through a Saturday night
01:22:04I'll never make another move in the light
01:22:07Cause if I see you and you're looking like that
01:22:10I'll get a tiny little heart attack
01:22:14It's not because I'm really easy to please
01:22:18It's not the way you bring it down on my knees
01:22:21It's just a feeling but it keeps coming back
01:22:24It's a tiny little heart attack
01:22:26Give me a tiny little heart attack
01:22:30Give me a tiny little heart attack
01:22:33I want a tiny little heart attack
01:22:37Give me a tiny little heart attack
01:22:40I want a tiny little heart attack
01:22:44You
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