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Taskmaster - S15E07 - Schrödinger's Egg [Full Movie] [Full Story]Full EP - Full
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00:02Brace! Brace!
00:03I'm bracing!
00:12No, no, no, no, no!
00:18No!
00:23Ah!
00:25What?
00:31APPLAUSE
00:36Hello, everybody, and welcome to Taskmaster.
00:40The road to Taskmaster victory is long.
00:42There are many hurdles, physically and psychologically.
00:44Different individuals respond in different ways,
00:47and sometimes on camera there are those that seem not to care
00:50at all how well they do.
00:51But do not be fooled.
00:53One of them came to my dressing room last night,
00:55hot tears streaming down their face.
00:57I want this more than I've ever wanted anything before.
01:01I want to make my family proud.
01:03Please, Greg.
01:04Please don't take this from me, please.
01:06Now, I would never reveal that person's identity,
01:09but I'll say this.
01:10Chin up!
01:11You're doing fine.
01:12And don't be silly.
01:13Of course you'll be able to show your face in Scotland again.
01:15LAUGHTER
01:19Let's meet them all now.
01:21Please give it an enormous round of applause to Frankie Bale!
01:24CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
01:25I know Graham.
01:27Jenny O'Klaan.
01:29Bael Smith-Baino.
01:31And Mae Martin.
01:34And next to me, a man who smells his own farts
01:37using what he describes as his guff and cup system.
01:40LAUGHTER
01:42It's...
01:42Eddie Clarence Hall!
01:48Hello.
01:49Hello.
01:50Hello.
01:51Hello.
01:51Good evening.
01:52How are you?
01:52I am great.
01:55Wow.
01:55For once.
01:56And I want to take an opportunity, if you wouldn't mind,
01:59an opportunity to thank this man,
02:01because, er, you get a lot of stick from people
02:04for being mean to me.
02:06I thought you were very nice.
02:07Four months ago, Greg gave me a watch.
02:09He said,
02:09I want to give you this,
02:10and he gave me that,
02:11and I...
02:12It's really nice.
02:14So...
02:14I mean, I don't know how to do it.
02:16APPLAUSE
02:16This is just true.
02:17Nice guy.
02:18I haven't got you anything,
02:18but you may do what you may...
02:21with me.
02:23LAUGHTER
02:24Pay back for my lovely present.
02:26LAUGHTER
02:28Put your tongue out.
02:30LAUGHTER
02:31What do I do?
02:33LAUGHTER
02:33OK.
02:38APPLAUSE
02:52..C'mon, then.
02:53Yesterday I got prized half-time,
02:54and this week, the category is...
02:55and this week the category is...
02:55..the most brilliant thing that pops up.
02:58You'll give five points to the top of the pops,
03:01and then one of them will be really happy at the end of the show
03:02when they win five brilliant answers.
03:03things that pop up back to you pops right obviously anyone who's brought a
03:08toaster in get ready for no points I thought hello hello Greg what's the most
03:14brilliant thing that you've brought in that pops up it's of course the game of
03:18whack-a-mole with a bespoke taskmaster twist here it is he's done this I like
03:30it more than I ever imagined I would not too proud not to put myself in the
03:36whack-a-mole I suffer as we all shall at the hands of the bat well it's nice you
03:44made the effort to make it taskmaster centric and I enjoy that it feels mid
03:49range at this stage the Japanese format of whack-a-mole magura tataki mole smash
03:54it's popular worldwide and now it's got our faces on it five points please
04:05you want me to enter five points I do not hello May you remember what you said about toasters
04:14bear with me okay I've brought a pop-tart but no way yeah this is May's most brilliant thing that
04:23pops
04:23up on the pop-tart is the most brilliant mind of our time my man professor Brian Cox look at
04:34his hair and welcome I was looking more attractive are you a fan of professor
04:40Brian Cox yeah he's fit yeah no I respect his mind all you're gonna see is my burning face
04:54have you never had an impression show Jenny you must be feeling a little bit encouraged by
05:03professor Brian Poptar do you like David Bowie do I yeah I don't mind him right David Bowie would
05:10never have had those big balloon trousers had it not been for this bloke called Oscar Schlemmer
05:17right and he designed the Bauhaus ballet so I have bought for you a Bauhaus ballet pop-up book here
05:27is the book yeah here it comes
05:29oh did you hear that noise the audience loved it Greg come on I don't mind it it's interesting because
05:39the lineage from Oscar Schlemmer
05:41to Bowie is all in the Bauhaus movement that's why these people came here Jenny yes
05:55the most brilliant thing that pops up is obviously oneself and what better thing to pop up on than a
06:02pogo stick
06:03oh my parents genuinely got me a pogo stick for Christmas I'm 35 years old I was like oh what
06:24what should I do with it and they were like bounce around with your friends
06:32you might avoid being bottom because I used to have a pogo stick and I quite liked it and that's
06:35the only reason I really like the image of you on a pogo stick
06:39that's quite good got into a nasty accident with Mark landed on his foot poor lad was he one of
06:45your students
06:51I think you must be feeling pretty confident here I I brought something that pops up regularly in my house
06:58I've tried to throw out of my
07:00house I think on three occasions and it always returns and I've ended up just hanging it on the wall
07:06in my living room and
07:07it is this very sinister painting here it is
07:10it is awful but I sort of love it who's putting it up the children deny
07:20but they're not trustworthy what is the least brilliant thing that pops up Greg well
07:25what do you think I feel like it might be the pop-tart it is
07:28oh it's just annoyed me it's out one point one point to my pogo stick two points
07:32oh book lazy three points unbelievably a whack-a-mole that he got some faces out
07:40I don't know why it's got four points Mae you're right it's inconsistent
07:43that's fine
07:44Ford driver
07:45and that painting doesn't deserve any praise but weirdly it's getting five points
07:48there
07:49one two three four five points
07:51for Frankie
07:54let's get Tuscan
07:55hmm well more like let's get pulping
08:12hello Alex
08:13hi Jenny
08:13please stand on the little circle
08:15okay
08:15what do you think this is?
08:18prime pan
08:19a Victorian satellite
08:20I think this is a like a World War 2 bomb
08:23be careful
08:24I'll put the safety gloves on
08:26of course if it's a bomb
08:26yeah yeah yeah
08:27okay
08:29rotate the pulper wheel without pulping the egg
08:31you must not move from this spot at any point
08:34if you pulp the egg you are disqualified
08:37most rotations wins
08:39you have a maximum of ten minutes
08:41pulper wheel
08:43obviously
08:45then what's a pulper?
08:46I see no egg
08:47this is a pulper
08:49right
08:49and the egg's in it
08:51where?
08:52wait hang on what's a pulper?
08:54obviously it's very tempting to go
08:55ha ha
08:57he's lived his whole life in cotton wool
08:58he's never used a pulper wheel
09:00but even
09:02much more practical
09:04contestants than me
09:05this is their first time doing this I think
09:09can I say I don't know what a pulper is?
09:11have you said your time starts now yet?
09:13no
09:14I wouldn't dream of it
09:15hmm
09:16you're going to have to say your time starts now
09:19your time starts now
09:21APPLAUSE
09:25over this series we're building up a very clear picture of what you were like as a child
09:30yes
09:32I've met that boy so many times
09:33no no no no
09:36let's start
09:36yes let's start
09:37we purchased the pulper
09:38and this is what's going to happen
09:39first up we're going to see Kael and Frankie starring in a little film I've called Pulp Friction
09:45the egg you said is what inside?
09:48in the mouth of the pulper
09:49where's that?
09:51I can't tell you anymore
09:51but I want to see it
09:53you can't see it
09:53how do I know it's there?
09:55you have to take my word for it
09:56try that before
09:58so it's just a kind of blind Schrodinger's egg
10:02exactly
10:03this?
10:04the pulper machine
10:05yes
10:05presses the cherries across an iron faceplate
10:08it might be a different one
10:09the pulper drives the impeller to rotate through the motor
10:12and the slurry in the tank is sucked out
10:14what?
10:16oh I hear the egg
10:234 to the turn
10:25do you reckon that was the egg?
10:27does it sound like an egg?
10:28mmm
10:29or a calculator
10:30no
10:47I mean it can be pulped if it's making that much noise
10:50I mean that's another way of looking at it
11:04I don't think that was the egg
11:06that's half a rotation
11:08I wonder if it goes faster
11:10it's less likely to break
11:18yeah I think the lack of speed is a problem
11:22hold it
11:22hold it
11:33I know what that was
11:35plastic chair
11:36plastic chair
11:38okay
11:45we're on eight and a half rotations
11:47stop in there
11:48yeah I think that's pretty good
11:52nothing there
11:55two
12:00it's gone
12:01you stopping there?
12:02yeah it's gone
12:03two and three quarters rotations
12:08this is the first time they've seen the interior of the pulper
12:11so they were blind obviously
12:13and the more you spun it the higher the egg got towards danger
12:16that's how it worked
12:17oh
12:19eight and a half turns then
12:20is quite an impressive bit of
12:22pre-pulp spinning
12:24brinkmanship
12:25the egg survived for both of them
12:26we've got a score of eight and a half
12:28versus two and three quarters
12:29but they're both still in play
12:30I put it to you Kael
12:31that throughout the task
12:32and indeed when you left
12:33you didn't know what was going on
12:37I still don't know what pulper is
12:38yeah
12:39we want to show more
12:40yeah
12:41okay next up to the pulper are Jenny and May
12:46right so the egg is in the machine
12:48oh yeah
12:49I'm gonna go very gently
12:58that's the egg
13:00I haven't even done a single rotation yet have I?
13:04oh fuck it
13:05pulp the egg
13:06it's more under pulpit
13:08pulp the stupid egg
13:10yeah get the egg pulp
13:11I'm not gonna win anyway
13:15there's no way that egg is not pulp
13:17that's one rotation
13:19I'm gonna pulp this egg
13:21get it pulp
13:22I want you smashed to smithereens
13:25you've still got nine minutes
13:26what?
13:27I can't keep this up for another nine
13:30in the olden days
13:31is this what the pulpers did?
13:32pulpers would come home to their wives
13:34the wives would be like
13:35did you pulp the egg?
13:37and they would be like
13:38I did eight rotations
13:43that's I want ten
13:44you want ten okay
13:45ten rotations
13:50it's smashed isn't it?
13:52the egg is smashed
13:52it's eleven
13:54I think an egg could survive this
14:04it's not the egg
14:06thirteen
14:07you want to stop one minute?
14:08okay
14:09yeah?
14:10yeah
14:10thanks Jenny
14:12how long?
14:13you've got just thirty seconds
14:17I would just poke myself
14:19if I hadn't pulped it
14:21and I stopped turning
14:36I'm intrigued by the characters
14:37that you created during that
14:39that's Mr and Mrs Egg Pulper
14:40yeah
14:41yeah yeah yeah
14:41where are they from that couple?
14:43wherever Nancy from Oliver Twist is from
14:45they're all yeah
14:46ow
14:47like that
14:49I mean I really enjoyed that
14:51they did very well but also very badly
14:52which means Kyle is still in second place
14:55and sometimes it doesn't matter if you don't understand the task
14:59right part one is about to have it on its toes
15:02open the back doors of the van and we'll bundle part two in shortly
15:05bye
15:06whoo
15:07whoo
15:09whoo
15:11whoo
15:11whoo
15:12whoo
15:13whoo
15:14whoo
15:16whoo
15:17oh yes
15:20hello we're back
15:21it's the second part of the show
15:23and there's a really noisy task in motion to test the bravery of our quivering quintet
15:27yes they're proactive pulpers that's for sure
15:30none of them knew what was happening inside the machine
15:32but they knew they needed to keep their eggs intact at all costs
15:35so far there have been two successful and two unsuccessful attempts
15:38so here's Ivo Graham to upset the balance
15:43I haven't been very good at lateral thinking tasks
15:45and I haven't been very good at egg tasks
15:48but I'm gonna find the egg
15:55can I move this spot
15:56all of the information
15:58well
15:59is on task
16:00yeah
16:13are you now better informed?
16:15no I wish I hadn't seen all this for you
16:19oh
16:20oh
16:23you've got five minutes left
16:24yep
16:44you've got three minutes left
16:45thirty
16:46thirty
16:47thirty
16:48thirty-one
16:48thirty-three
16:54ten seconds
16:55last poll
17:05I felt some weird level of prize watching the Ivo frog bounce his way round
17:13I think there was immense dignity watching my body spasm with a glove peg in my mouth
17:20so it wasn't cheating?
17:22you just had to stay on the spot at all times
17:24oh shit why didn't I think of that?
17:27well he clearly rotated it more than anyone else 56 times congratulations Ivo
17:35so Jenny and May don't get any points apologies three points to Kael
17:39four to Frankie but of course five to Ivo Graham
17:44let's have a scoreboard pass boy
17:45okay it means that those two Frankie and Ivo are in the joint leading spot nine points each
17:51mmm
17:54I think it's about time we're in another team task
17:56oh I do too Greg it feels so right
17:59so here's a pretty sweet one just for you
18:16oh
18:17yeah
18:17Frankie
18:20oh Ivo
18:21hello
18:22oh my goodness this has gone a bit S&M-y
18:25oh okay
18:26hello
18:28ooh
18:28it's you first
18:31me
18:32mm-hmm
18:35do we have a safe word?
18:37you've done this before
18:39yeah I'm really at home
18:40great
18:41well I've been arrested obviously but I haven't done sex games with these
18:46couple more things
18:51jelly babies
18:52jelly babies?
18:53yes
18:54they're numbered one two three four five
18:58hmm
19:02completely free yourselves and have a team hug
19:05fastest team hug
19:06wins
19:07your time starts
19:10now
19:10okay
19:11so there's a one on here and is there another number on this one?
19:16this is two
19:17hmm
19:18hmm
19:22well Johnny Eclairs the chirpiest S&M-er I've ever met
19:27fun
19:28listen let's focus on the task
19:29okay right
19:30I'm looking forward to seeing them free themselves
19:32okay let's see the handcuffed
19:34threesome of May, Jenny and Kyle
19:36there's a key here
19:38Kyle can you reach the key? let's try
19:44stretch
19:45come on
19:46that's definitely impossible
19:48first thing for a minute
19:50I'm gonna count my
19:51I've got 15 in here
19:52one
19:53hey what's that menu?
19:56okay so these are different flavoured jelly babies
19:59okay well I'm gonna bite the head off one and see if I've got a flavour
20:02four
20:02oh Jesus Christ that's the most disgusting thing I've ever used in my life
20:06six
20:06I think it might be chicken feet
20:08oh
20:10oh
20:11I'd like to have the bottom half of the jet
20:12there's 15 in here too
20:13I'm gonna eat one of these
20:14what wait but what is the
20:16because you want to or what is there a pen behind it
20:18this is a five digit code and there's five glasses
20:21but then what does it prove?
20:24we're gonna have to figure out what flavour all these are
20:26and then we're gonna have to use those
20:28but then they're not numbered
20:28those aren't numbers
20:29but that will correspond with the periodic table somehow
20:31before I buy anything
20:32I need to know
20:34four
20:35yeah
20:36very bad
20:37very bad
20:38wasabi
20:39wasabi
20:39okay
20:40wait but what do you mean okay?
20:41like okay and then fuck
20:42that's gonna correspond with that
20:44like maybe the initials of it
20:46what's w
20:4774
20:50oh
20:52it's mint and gravy
20:54I'm going mint
20:55it's mint and gravy
20:55all right
20:56so you had wasabi
20:57I'm gonna be sick
20:58mint and gravy
21:00it's mg
21:01which is magnesium
21:02and what number?
21:0312
21:03okay
21:05so you think that I should have 12 and then go to the
21:07yes
21:08so one two seven four
21:10seven four
21:11okay
21:11I'm gonna keep doing them
21:12number three is green
21:19you can do it
21:23hold on
21:24May if I do it one by one
21:26it's gonna give us a clue to what it might be
21:28because at some point
21:28oh that's really clever
21:31yes
21:32what was it?
21:33okay
21:34so what starts with a zero?
21:36what starts with a zero?
21:37so it could be bacon and kale
21:38it could be broccoli
21:39is that the green one?
21:41could it be broccoli?
21:41that's a B
21:42zero five
21:43so we start with five on the next log
21:45we're on to
21:46okay
21:49it's really weird
21:51this is definitely pepper and beetroot
21:53oh that's definitely beetroot
21:54lead
21:5582
21:56and then the next one was
21:58seaweed
21:59oh seaweed
22:01i've got it
22:02i've just got it
22:03i really hate
22:04yes
22:04uh
22:05yeah
22:06i've got it
22:10weeey
22:12there you go
22:14well done
22:15well done
22:15well done
22:15oh scene hunt
22:21is it fair to say that jenny and may were the most active members of the escape committee
22:25What I will say is that that has been edited very nicely in my favour,
22:34because I was a monster in that room.
22:37I'm so glad they cut it out, cos it was really tense.
22:40I wasn't putting fucking broccoli jelly babies in my mouth.
22:44I mean, that much quickly became apparent.
22:47It was a very difficult task.
22:49They took the same amount of time you could listen to
22:51all that I want is another baby five times.
22:5417 minutes 50.
22:56APPLAUSE
22:57OK, time for a break.
22:58Just time for those couples watching
23:00who let the family dog sleep in the same bed as them
23:03to reflect on the day you threw the towel in on your love life.
23:06Bye!
23:17Hello, and a warm welcome back to part three,
23:21tell me stuff, Alex.
23:22Sure, Greg.
23:23Well, jelly babies,
23:24the periodic table,
23:25handcuffs,
23:26and the ultimate goal of a hug.
23:27That's a typical day for me.
23:29Coincidentally,
23:29they're also the main ingredients of the current team task,
23:32but how quickly will the intelligent team of Frankie and Ivo
23:34work out the conundrum,
23:35release themselves from the cuffs,
23:36and embrace victorious?
23:38Let's find out.
23:40Right.
23:42We both have a five?
23:43Sure, OK.
23:46Mm, that's quite pleasant, isn't it?
23:48Green.
23:49No.
23:49Mm.
23:50It might be broccoli.
23:52In fact, it is broccoli, I think.
23:53OK.
23:54Number four is hot, do you think?
23:57Oh!
23:58Really fucking unpleasant.
23:59Could be cumin and radish.
24:00Cumin and radish.
24:01There must be a CR.
24:04So maybe if broccoli was B,
24:06so if we tick that as five,
24:08yeah, CR, chromium, 24.
24:11But how does that help us?
24:12Because that gives us two digits,
24:14unless we add them together.
24:15Why don't we add two and four together to make six?
24:20Let's see what number three is.
24:21This doesn't have a lot of taste to it.
24:23Mint and gravy?
24:24Yeah.
24:26Magnesium, which is 12.
24:27Mint and gravy.
24:28So we add those together, that would be three.
24:31Oh, no.
24:31So, I reckon if you just laid out the ten numbers,
24:34the first five would be padlock one
24:36and the second five would be padlock two.
24:38Well, that's complicated things.
24:40I think both the padlocks will be the same.
24:43BUZZER
24:44BUZZER
24:45What's that?
24:47Pepper and beetroot, maybe?
24:49PB.
24:508-2 would give us ten,
24:52which is a two-digit number,
24:53which is no use in this five-digit debacle.
24:56Adding those numbers together.
24:59You know, it does seem a waste of, you know,
25:01all these two-digit elements.
25:03Well, OK, let's just add you.
25:05I've got so much respect for you, Frankie,
25:07but I don't think it's adding the numbers together.
25:10I've never thought that.
25:12Your system or mine?
25:15Oh, let's go with yours, man.
25:17OK, so, one, two, seven, four.
25:21Broccoli, B.
25:22So the last number is O.
25:24Yes!
25:25Yes!
25:26And now...
25:28I was so wrong.
25:30Start with a five.
25:32Eight, two.
25:33Get ready to hug Frankie.
25:35There's the one.
25:36Here comes the six.
25:41Uh, you're not...
25:42You're not completely free.
25:43Uh-oh.
25:45All right.
25:46I'm at QB.
25:52There's no key here.
25:54Oh, and a jelly baby thing?
26:00It's not fair that you should make a task feel so like it's finally finished
26:04and then it'd just be getting started.
26:09It's right there above the periodic table.
26:11LAUGHTER
26:12It turned out to be a big ratchet hug, I'm afraid.
26:15Not from me, baby.
26:20CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
26:24Both hugs, for me, adorable.
26:26The handcuffed hug particularly.
26:30You felt reticent to point out to Frankie that his system was incorrect.
26:34Well, obviously, there was a period where there was a very strong chance
26:38that Frankie's system might be correct.
26:40It's co-pilot syndrome, isn't it?
26:42You know, a lot of plane crashes happen because...
26:44LAUGHTER
26:46The co-pilot is too scared to say to the brash pilot,
26:50look, we're going to cut the fucking ground here.
26:52LAUGHTER
26:55And that was that guy.
26:57And then, during it, I asked Alex to isolate a picture of the co-pilot's face
27:02when he knew that he had the answer but wasn't sure he should say anything.
27:06LAUGHTER
27:06This is the face?
27:07Yeah.
27:09LAUGHTER
27:14Let's talk about points.
27:15OK, the team of three took 17 minutes and 50 seconds.
27:20The team of two took 42 minutes...
27:24LAUGHTER
27:26I can't wonder.
27:28I'm guessing five points for the team of three.
27:30Of course it is.
27:31The team of two did achieve the task eventually.
27:34Oh, yeah, there's points.
27:34They can.
27:35I can't give them any more than two points for that.
27:37Oh, right.
27:37Five points to the team of three.
27:38Two to the team of two!
27:39There it is.
27:42Can we fit one more task in, please?
27:44Definitely, Greg.
27:45And this one begins with them making some very important decisions.
28:04This gold pen reminds me of school.
28:07Like, one boy in a year would have a gold pen.
28:10I'd have it by the end of the year, though.
28:12LAUGHTER
28:14Oh.
28:15Write down a number between zero and 100.
28:19A length of time between one minute and 20 minutes.
28:23Five ingredients.
28:24A country, a noun...
28:26And an adjective.
28:28This seems too simple.
28:30You have three minutes.
28:31Your time starts now.
28:33Why does that seem so easy?
28:35Well, and then what do I have to do with it?
28:37Prismally, there's some trick involved.
28:39Number between zero and 100.
28:4150.
28:4280.
28:4342.
28:44Meaning of life.
28:4575.
28:46Seven.
28:47Lovely.
28:48The length of time between one minute and 20 minutes.
28:51Two minutes.
28:5315 minutes.
28:5419 minutes.
28:56Four minutes, 20 seconds.
29:00What's the meaning of life?
29:0121 seconds.
29:06One minute and 21 seconds.
29:10Five ingredients.
29:11These ingredients are going to bounce back and hit me in the face.
29:14Chilli.
29:15Cherries.
29:15Sausage.
29:16Ketchup.
29:16Bun.
29:17Mustard.
29:17Grilled onions.
29:19You know what that means?
29:20I don't know.
29:21Hot dog.
29:22Ah.
29:23Basil.
29:24Cumin.
29:26Garlic.
29:28Salt.
29:30And...
29:31Cannellini beans.
29:33A country.
29:34Scotland.
29:35France.
29:35Guatemala.
29:37Peñar.
29:37Germany.
29:38Place to live there.
29:40Uh, noun.
29:41Duck.
29:42Shoe.
29:42Dog.
29:44Bench.
29:46Large.
29:47Splendid.
29:48Feisty.
29:5012 seconds.
29:51Oh.
29:52Cowering.
29:53Gold.
29:54Is this a trick?
29:57Ooh.
29:58See you later.
29:59All right.
30:14The adjectives are more interesting than the nouns.
30:16Duck.
30:17Duck.
30:18Shoe.
30:18Dog.
30:18Bench.
30:19That's what they've gone for.
30:20Bench.
30:20Two of them went for duck.
30:21The first noun that came in.
30:22Yeah.
30:23There were a lot of ducks around the house, though.
30:25That may be something to do with it.
30:26Yes.
30:27There were?
30:28Like...
30:29No, not real ducks.
30:30OK, OK.
30:32Shall we start with the double duckers?
30:33Double duckers.
30:33Yes, well, they both chose duck as their go-to noun.
30:36So let's see Ivo and May together.
30:40Hello.
30:40Hello.
30:41Hello.
30:41Hi.
30:42If it isn't, my dream five ingredients.
30:46Make a splendid Guatemalan duck.
30:49Make a feisty French duck.
30:51You must use all these ingredients and you must also clap 80 times.
30:55And you must also clap 42 times.
30:57You have four minutes and 20 seconds.
30:59You have 19 minutes.
31:01Your time starts now.
31:07I could have picked any noun and I picked duck.
31:10So, which is a food?
31:118, 9, 80.
31:13That would be good news if any of this was...
31:16duck.
31:21Does it?
31:22Yeah, sweet corn.
31:23Sure, I saw duck.
31:25What I need is to make a mould of a duck.
31:29Christ!
31:30The time!
31:31That's a duck.
31:34Good.
31:35Really good.
31:37No.
31:38No, not so good.
31:39Why didn't I just ask for more time?
31:41I designed my own task.
31:44Oh, it's burning.
31:45It's burning.
31:46French duck.
31:48Oh.
31:50God!
31:53Um, so what else is...
31:55I think this is all about confidence.
32:06I think I've just got to just do a duck.
32:09Just be honest.
32:10WHISTLE BLOWS
32:14Good evening.
32:16Good evening, mate.
32:17I've made for you a splendid Guatemalan duck.
32:23Bonjour, Alex.
32:25Don't do what I go.
32:28I've been busy.
32:30Too late to pop a little berry on?
32:35Do you see the beak?
32:37Do I see the wings?
32:38Uh, they were removed.
32:40It's Guatemalan because of the sauce, is it?
32:42And corn comes from Central America.
32:44Mm-hmm.
32:45Splendid.
32:48Why is he French?
32:49Well, the garlic is obviously doing some pretty heavy lifting.
32:52It's too heavy to hang around the neck, unfortunately.
32:55He's got a beret on, but I did forget to do all my claps.
32:59Yeah, it's good.
33:00Really?
33:00Yeah.
33:01I like it.
33:07And, May, I put it to you that your duck mould was no more useful
33:11than just chucking two piles of sweet corn onto a plate.
33:15Yeah.
33:15Did you think the end result was splendid?
33:17Actually, Alex, like, went back for a second bite.
33:20Like, it was not that bad, was it?
33:22He'll eat anything, though.
33:23All of that is true.
33:25You won't eat anything, will you, Alex?
33:26Didn't see you sort of tucking into my...
33:29All I could do, surely, was lick your duck.
33:33Niftyly moving that spot around the pulper
33:35feels a long time ago now.
33:39It does make me feel quite sorry for you sometimes
33:41when you grip your head.
33:43Yeah.
33:44Like a chimpanzee whose habitat is under threat.
33:50Oh, dear.
33:51Right, there's just one part left,
33:53and in it, someone will win today's competition and scream,
33:55Yes!
33:56At last, I've won a Professor Brian Cox Pop-Tart
33:59and a pogo stick!
34:00Woo-hoo!
34:09CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
34:12Hello again!
34:14Welcome back to the final instalment of today's show.
34:17Alex, can you please sum up your break for me in one word?
34:19Plop.
34:21Rather than go into detail, let's get the current task finished.
34:24The comics wrote down some numbers, some ingredients, a country,
34:26a noun, and an adjective, all to give them the chance
34:29to make the next part of the task nice and easy for them.
34:32Here's Frankie making a dog, Jenny making a shoe,
34:34and Kael making a bench.
34:37LAUGHTER
34:37So, these are the things I mentioned earlier.
34:39It was a trick.
34:41Make a large Scottish dog.
34:44Make a cowering Kenyan bench.
34:47Make a gold German shoe.
34:49You must use all these ingredients.
34:51And you must also clap seven times.
34:5350 times.
34:5475 times.
34:56You have 15 minutes, most accurate creation wins.
35:00One minute and 21 seconds.
35:03Two minutes?
35:05Yeah, that's what you wanted.
35:12Oh, God.
35:14The time starts now.
35:18You've got just over a minute left.
35:20Oh, wow.
35:21I'm going to cook that fucking potato,
35:23because this is going to be edible.
35:25We've got an eye.
35:26Oh, man.
35:30There is a gold shoe outside.
35:33Mein Geldschuh.
35:35Bitter.
35:36Jawohl.
35:38I was hoping that it would look like a tail,
35:39but it just looks like it's sort of shat everywhere.
35:42You've got 30 seconds.
35:45That goes in there like that.
35:51Hi, Frankie.
35:57Hi.
35:58What have you made me?
35:59I've made you?
36:00A large Scottish dog.
36:01Look, there's the St. Andrew's flag there.
36:04Oh, to show that it's Scottish?
36:05Oh.
36:06Yeah, but what's showing that it's a dog?
36:10Erm...
36:11That's dinner.
36:12It's here.
36:13It's a slightly undercooked jillicum carne.
36:16I'd eat with caution and milk.
36:19I normally do.
36:21It's a cowering Kenyan bench.
36:25Please, can you show me the Kenyan aspect?
36:27It's difficult to see with the human eye.
36:30But on every part of those grilled onions, it says Nairobi.
36:34Oh.
36:35Is it?
36:36I'm cowering.
36:37It's hiding from this...
36:39It's not, it's not really a sort of eating situation, is it?
36:43Oh.
36:48Very nice.
36:49Is it?
36:49This might be my perfect meal.
36:55Taste of Africa?
36:57It's delicious.
37:03Well, I suppose the obvious question, Mr. Frankie, and it's, erm,
37:07have you ever seen a dog before?
37:09The big red eyes of a Scottish dog.
37:12The singular big red eye of the flowery Scottish dog.
37:17Erm, in what way is, erm, chilli con carne stuck in a shoe German?
37:21Other than you kept speaking like a cast member of Hello, Hello, of course.
37:26I just was trying my best.
37:29I know that you're going to tell me something that's so awful.
37:32I don't think I clapped.
37:34I don't think I fucking clapped.
37:36I don't think I clapped.
37:38Did I clap?
37:39I didn't clap.
37:40Jenny, not only did you not clap, you finished with one minute to go
37:43and sat down.
37:45LAUGHTER
37:47APPLAUSE
37:48Kyle, I have to say, it was pretty impressive
37:51that he managed to create that.
37:53And I did understand the imagery as well.
37:56I mean, I maybe questioned whether he'd had time
38:00to engrave Nairobi onto the onions.
38:02LAUGHTER
38:03It's hard to see.
38:05I genuinely was quite impressed.
38:06Was Jenny's chilli nice?
38:08The task wasn't really about whether it tasted nice.
38:11I didn't have to eat them.
38:11I was just making conversation, you bellend.
38:14LAUGHTER
38:16Go on, let's get on, if you like.
38:18Here are all five.
38:20Pay close attention to Frankie's top left.
38:23Also, he didn't clap, so it's not that relevant.
38:26Well, they're all so wonderful I feel a bit mean giving zero.
38:30I would give the people who didn't clap one charity point.
38:34So the top row, Frankie, Ivo and Jenny all one point.
38:36And the other two, I'm sure I'll be judged very harshly for this,
38:40but I am more impressed by the bench.
38:42LAUGHTER
38:42I am.
38:43It took only a minute.
38:44APPLAUSE
38:44Kyle gets five points.
38:47I need a scoreboard update, please.
38:49In this episode, Greg, two people who've not won a show yet
38:52could do.
38:53Kyle's in the lead on 15, Frankie's in joint second on 12.
38:56APPLAUSE
39:00Right, then.
39:01You know the drill.
39:03Please vacate those seats for the final task of the show!
39:07APPLAUSE
39:14Hello, young man.
39:16My tongue is still sore.
39:18LAUGHTER
39:18Who will read the task out?
39:20May Martin, please.
39:22Say the word given to you by the taskmaster
39:24in the accent on the card you choose.
39:27The taskmaster will guess what accent you're doing.
39:30Highest score after three rounds wins.
39:33I hope Brian Cox is one of the options.
39:35LAUGHTER
39:36Are you ready for the first word?
39:37Yes.
39:38They've all been given a country.
39:39We're going to start with May and go from right to left.
39:41What's the first word, Greg?
39:43Taskmaster.
39:46Taskmaster.
39:47APPLAUSE
39:50Where is May from?
39:52Scotland.
39:53Let's see on the card.
39:56Oh!
39:57LAUGHTER
39:58My whole family are from Wales, mate.
40:01LAUGHTER
40:02Next up, it's Kael's.
40:04Kael, good luck.
40:05Tiss, mister.
40:10APPLAUSE
40:11South Africa.
40:13What's the country, Kael?
40:15New Zealand.
40:17LAUGHTER
40:18Jenny's turn.
40:21Taskmaster.
40:25Norwegian.
40:26Sweden.
40:28Sweden.
40:28It's so close.
40:29Very close.
40:29It is so close.
40:31High vote's ten.
40:32Taskmaster?
40:33LAUGHTER
40:36Is Disney a country?
40:39APPLAUSE
40:42Generic American in there.
40:43America?
40:44Sorry, May.
40:46Canada.
40:47Oh, close.
40:48Sort of is generic America, isn't it?
40:51LAUGHTER
40:53LAUGHTER
40:55APPLAUSE
40:55Frankie, you all right?
40:57Could get the first point in round one.
40:59Taskmaster!
41:01LAUGHTER
41:01He's from Ireland.
41:04It is from the Republic...
41:06I vote.
41:06Mr Gregory Daniel Davis.
41:08Yes.
41:09I think that's Ivo trying to sound like a street-tough New Yorker.
41:13I'm sticking with it, New York.
41:15I'm always trying to be street-tough.
41:17It's New York!
41:18CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
41:21Frankie.
41:22Mr Gregory Daniel Davis.
41:25LAUGHTER
41:27Absolutely easy.
41:28Belfast.
41:29Easy Impressionals.
41:30CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
41:33Man of a thousand voices.
41:36Two voices!
41:39So, round three's a little different.
41:41This time it's walking.
41:43On these cards, we've got all your names and our names.
41:47They are in there several times, so you might have the same ones twice.
41:51Grace is going to try to spot the person by the walk.
41:53May's going to start, right?
41:54Yes.
41:54OK.
41:55Good luck.
41:57LAUGHTER
42:07Whilst I personally don't think this is accurate.
42:11Are we correct?
42:13Yeah.
42:14CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
42:16K.L.
42:19LAUGHTER
42:25Well, I can assume it's a repeat.
42:26It is possible that it's a repeat.
42:28OK.
42:28I'll roll the dice.
42:29That was poor Jenny again.
42:32LAUGHTER
42:32She's become poor Jenny.
42:33He's correct.
42:35You know, when laughing tears are really, really...
42:38LAUGHTER
42:40Good luck.
42:41I'd love it if it's you.
42:43LAUGHTER
42:45LAUGHTER
42:59I know that subservient gait.
43:02LAUGHTER
43:03Alex Horne.
43:04Yes, it was Alex Horne.
43:07CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
43:21It was the, in my opinion, very graceful Jenny Eclair.
43:27When does this cross into bullying?
43:30LAUGHTER
43:30I've already lost the episode.
43:32I just wanted to have a go at it.
43:34LAUGHTER
43:36APPLAUSE
43:40Oh, lovely.
43:41One left.
43:42Frankie...
43:43With an unblemished...
43:44Frankie, roll the Jenny Eclair dice.
43:46LAUGHTER
43:54I think Frankie was doing Kael.
43:58May Martin!
43:59LAUGHTER
44:00And there we are.
44:02We'll add all that to the final scores and see where we get to.
44:04Come on down and join me.
44:12CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
44:12Good boy.
44:15Thanks, mate.
44:15Oh, can I call you mate?
44:16Thanks, mate?
44:17No.
44:18LAUGHTER
44:18Yes, well, Kael, May and Frankie came joint first.
44:22They each got two out of the three.
44:24So they get five points each.
44:26Well done, then.
44:26CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
44:28Unfortunately, thanks to Ivo throwing a go
44:30and Jenny's Newcastle abomination,
44:33they come joint fourth, so get two points each.
44:37There we go.
44:37They still did very well.
44:39You have a new winner.
44:41Never guess who it is.
44:42With 20 points, it's Kael Smith-Baino!
44:44CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
44:46Kael Smith-Baino wins!
44:48Please pop up to collect your proper prizes!
44:53CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
44:54To you again soon, but please, let's hear it once more
44:56for tonight's winner, Kael Smith-Baino!
44:59CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
45:22APPLAUSE
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