- 3 hours ago
Taskmaster - S17E05 - Snooker Cue Umbrella Chin [Full Movie] [Trending]Full EP - Full
Category
🎥
Short filmTranscript
00:02Oh
00:38If my social media communications are anything to go by attracts sociopathic nerds who mistakenly believe they have the right
00:46to reply
00:49Titans please welcome Joanne McNally
01:02I'm next to me a man who on a night out recently confided in me about his theory that strength
01:09of regional accent is directly related to lack of intelligence
01:16Don't shoot the messenger shoot
01:27I want to talk about something quite her grown-up a bit of adult stuff
01:33So sorry, but what what's that under there Greg what's that under there? Well, what's that under there?
01:49See you at the price does
01:51Price task and things are gonna get hot in here because we're gonna get to see their most
01:56Extraordinary pictures five points for the picture Greg thinks is the most extraordinary and one lucky winner will take home
02:01five extraordinary pictures
02:02Hello, Sophie. Oh, I love what?
02:05Extraordinary picture have you bought me? I set up a little studio in the dressing room and I made you
02:10this
02:10Oh
02:13It's the dancing bowl from episode one. Oh, that's great. Really? Well, let me give you a different take on
02:19it, Nick
02:21Why is it extraordinary though? I mean it's extraordinary to discover that you've got some level of ability art
02:31GCSE
02:33I think why it's extraordinary is look at the fur at the ends that's flight flinging off that was purposeful
02:39Could it be evolved that's very recently died I
02:45Thought it was running into a fire
02:49It's neither bad nor extraordinary
02:52Well done Sophie
02:55Nick what have you brought in well art so this is a picture that I have taken and it's a
03:01picture of a sign outside of a
03:03Church quite near where I live and I just find it extraordinary that teases is so big
03:16There's a slight raise of voice on till and Sunday as well
03:21homemade cream
03:22Tease 3 p.m. till 5 p.m. Sunday
03:26Scoot the shit out of me that
03:29It is extraordinary
03:31Thanks Greg
03:32John
03:32Hi Greg
03:33Can you beat a shouty sign?
03:34We all work in entertainment in various forms and people watching us might think it's a very glamorous industry
03:41However, my picture was taken of a comedian called Paul McCaffrey and captures the true bleakness of being a traveling
03:49comedian better than any image in the history of civilization
03:54Jesus Christ that's a builder
04:03Oh my god, I have been in that chair
04:07I love that he's being packed in a restaurant
04:10He's being recognized from a TV show and the guy taking the picture is sort of unaware of the moment
04:18of complete
04:20Sort of it's a mixture of self-hatred
04:24Yeah
04:26It's bafflement at how life turned out this way
04:29Do you know what?
04:29When I first saw it I didn't even realize that someone had taken that picture and posted it
04:33I thought it was someone Paul knew
04:35No
04:35No, it's a member of the public
04:39Wow, that's going to take some beating
04:40Joanne
04:41You said an extraordinary picture and I was like mine's more experiential
04:45Mine's a thought and movement and experience
04:48Ready?
04:49Yeah
04:49Ready for the experience
04:50I'm going to turn away and then I'm going to experience it
04:52No, you have to look at it to experience it
04:54LAUGHTER
05:01There, look, oh, Shea, yeah
05:05LAUGHTER
05:07But that's Shea Guevara
05:09I know who it is
05:11LAUGHTER
05:11On a balloon?
05:12Yeah
05:14I thought it was important to just raise awareness
05:17Oh, Shea Guevara
05:18Of Shea on a balloon
05:19Yeah
05:20And if I, if you give me the five points I will donate my fee to the Cuban revolution
05:25LAUGHTER
05:25They do have a GoFundMe, I've just found out
05:27The Cuban revolution
05:29LAUGHTER
05:31What is the political statement you were making?
05:33I'm making the statement that
05:35Balloons are, balloons are pricey
05:37That's it, inflation
05:38LAUGHTER
05:44Actually, you did say it would be extraordinarily good
05:46You just said extraordinary
05:47Mine's extraordinarily shite
05:49LAUGHTER
05:51Very great, very great
05:54Hello, Steve
05:55Hello, are you all right?
05:56What I've brought in is a photograph of two friends
05:58Here it is
05:59LAUGHTER
06:04The gentleman on the right, whose name is Glug Gravy's
06:10He was a geography teacher who took early retirement
06:13And then his friend, Alan Horns, runs a pub quiz
06:17It is sinister, isn't it?
06:19I mean, we're not, we're not great looking guys with our own faces
06:24LAUGHTER
06:26But, Jesus Christ
06:28You must have thought about it though
06:30I must have thought about swapping our faces
06:33On a long flight, all I think about is your torso
06:36And one of my eyes, one of yours, your legs, my arms
06:39And just see what, you know, see how that works
06:41LAUGHTER
06:41LAUGHTER
06:42That's funny, isn't it?
06:43It's a relatively short thing he said to me
06:45And yet I still tuned out halfway
06:48LAUGHTER
06:50Sometimes I just mark on instinct
06:51Hmm
06:52OK?
06:53I didn't find Shake of Ara's balloon going down
06:55Remotely extraordinary
06:57I'm giving it one point
06:57I don't like looking at our faces
06:59Even if they're chopped off and put on the other face
07:02I'm giving that two points
07:03I think you're perfectly good at art
07:04All right, thank you, I'll take that
07:06I'll give you three points
07:07Shouty Tees, four points
07:09The Paul McCaffrey Scream of Despair
07:12LAUGHTER
07:12Five points
07:13Well done, Paul Moria
07:14APPLAUSE
07:16Right, let's get on with the task proper, shall we?
07:19OK, then, Greg
07:19And get a load of this one, if you can bear it
07:35Alex?
07:35Nick Mohammed?
07:37Hi, yes
07:37Present
07:38Thank you
07:43Ah!
07:44What are you wearing?
07:45My special belt
07:48Hello
07:48I was hiding
07:49You were hiding?
07:50You look like a sort of action hero
07:52Or as close to an action hero as you're ever going to look
07:57Sophie?
07:58Yes?
07:58Are you all right?
07:59Just taking precautions
08:00Right, oh, God, OK
08:03Hello?
08:04Are you wearing a girdle?
08:07LAUGHTER
08:08Be the most impressive load-bearer
08:12Be the most impressive load-bearer
08:15Hmm
08:16In 15 minutes' time
08:17You would stand at the doormat
08:18Wave with one hand above your head
08:20And give a nice big thumbs up with the other
08:22Whilst bearing the most impressive load
08:27Right
08:29Your load must not be touching anything other than you
08:32Your time starts when Alex interrupts-
08:48You
08:54You
08:56I missed my opportunity
08:58I'm going to try again
09:02You have to say something
09:06I'll have to interrupt you physically
09:13I'll have to interrupt you physically
09:14Because I can
09:16Fair enough for you
09:16I'm wearing a weightlifters belt
09:23There's no reason for him to wear it
09:27He's just going
09:28Everyone look at me
09:29Everyone goes
09:29Oh, he's such a nice guy
09:30No, the guy's a prick
09:33Um
09:34OK
09:35It's all about load-bearing, right?
09:37Yeah
09:37We start with a bit of Joe
09:38And a bit of sow
09:40OK
09:40Well, I suppose I'll take that
09:41Yeah, yeah
09:43What's this for, to balance it out?
09:45It's for strong men
09:45Oh, so can I stick stuff in there?
09:47Do whatever you want, Joanne
09:50Hmm
09:51What's impressive as a load?
09:54What's an impressive load?
09:56Like, could I wear that around my neck?
09:59No
10:07Brought the bucket of balls
10:08I mean, let's build a lot of this
10:10It's just looking in that shed
10:11And sort of having a panic attack, isn't it really?
10:17Well, well, well
10:18Look at this
10:20I think it's all about
10:23Utilising different structures, isn't it?
10:25Within
10:26Your own body
10:28Are you in pain?
10:30Not at all
10:31I've never felt better
10:35So I've maximised the load
10:36By using the pegging system
10:39Yeah
10:40That's a load in itself
10:41And then I've loaded the loader
10:43And then there's some steering wheels
10:44And hula hoops around the neck for balance
10:46Oh, and a plunger in there somewhere
10:48Yeah, look at that
10:49Lovely
10:50This is good, cos then what I can do
10:52Is put the balls
10:53In the skirt
10:55Shall I pour them in?
10:57Yeah
11:02Right
11:03It's quite wet
11:04Yeah
11:05It's just quite wet
11:06So I wasn't expecting that
11:07No
11:12Release
11:14Oh no
11:16Oh no
11:21Do anyone know and saw that today?
11:22Thank you
11:29Thank you
11:30Thank you
11:30Well, interesting
11:31I thought both ladies did what we call on this show
11:34A shed panic
11:37Joanne
11:38Yeah?
11:38Did you think it was impressive?
11:39Did you think it was impressive?
11:40I mean, yeah
11:41I clipped all the cotlery individually onto that pagan thing
11:43I mean, that's the one thing I would say you did quite well
11:46Yeah
11:47Aside from that, what I wrote down is
11:49You look like an old lady who had to fall into a room of her own tat
11:55This is Sophie and Joanne
11:57They're in their impressive loads
12:01If I didn't know what this task was, I wouldn't say that woman's got an impressive load
12:09Yeah
12:09I look deranged
12:10Oh
12:11Oh
12:12I mean, you look like you've done a lot of shouting in a high street
12:18You...Sophie looks like she's turned up to a beach party that everyone has desperately tried to stop her finding out
12:24about
12:26I mean, it's hard to know which one of these two you want to turn up less
12:33Both of them are saying, I didn't get any of the Whatsapps
12:37Have you got some new statistics?
12:39Yeah, so we did weigh the amount of load they were bearing
12:43Sophie, 13.2 kilograms versus 5.4 for Joanne
12:47Half of which was the traffic cone
12:50Right, who are we going to see next?
12:52It's time to get a load of Nick and Steve
12:55They're an impressive load
12:57Bear
12:58Bear
12:59Bear
13:00Bear
13:01Got a rare tiger, don't know why
13:02But it's quite impressive
13:04Also, it's got a sort of natural
13:08How heavy is the caravan?
13:11I'm only kidding
13:13It's just some dress-up clothes
13:14If you go into the secret room
13:17The secret room?
13:18Yeah, it's in the caravan
13:19Ah
13:20It's like
13:20This is a way of sort of
13:22Being higher
13:24Have you done this whole thing before?
13:25No
13:25Right
13:26Have you found the secret room?
13:28Um
13:28This?
13:29Yep
13:29Oh my god
13:30You're kidding
13:32Oh my god
13:33This is amazing
13:35Come on Linda
13:37Nick
13:38Oh yeah
13:41Um
13:41Um
13:42Right
13:45What I'm going to do is create somebody who's riding the tiger and the tiger and the person are on
13:50my back
13:55We could do this
13:57We could do this
13:58We could do this
13:59We could do this
13:59We could do this
13:59Another six inches, Steve
14:00It's easy for you to say
14:03How to do it
14:04Still maintain some dignity
14:08That is the question
14:16Oh
14:16Oh
14:17Oh
14:17Oh
14:17Oh
14:27Yeah, how long about your eyes you've got two minutes Nick we are
14:34Attempting something that's not been attempted before
14:38on UK TV
14:46Oh, you've got your dignity. Thank you
15:01Well Steve, what is it what a showman
15:03You know what when I found out there was a secret dressing-up room
15:07I was that little five-year-old boy again and to see you acting like a five-year-old boy
15:12was very creepy
15:14One of my favorite moments on the series so far is the question and answer have you ever done this
15:19before no
15:23The way you pick that chair up I thought well he's obviously done street performance
15:28The confidence with which you can pick up a chair
15:34You didn't have to wave and do the thumbs up for any certain length of time
15:37Oh, you just have to be up to it very very briefly you did
15:39Oh, the load was on his chin
15:41Yeah
15:45Right, I'm suspending all joy for a few minutes. Why?
15:49With these adverts
16:02Welcome back to the second part of today's Taskmaster Hour
16:06Yes, and as Darwin said, a man who dares to waste one hour of time has not discovered the value
16:12of life
16:13Whoopsie
16:14Our contestants are trying to become the most impressive load-bearers
16:18We only have one man left to see and his John is Robbins
16:24Oh, I don't mind that
16:27Have we got any model Greggs around because it would be quite impressive to have Greg on the old shoulders
16:33Yeah, I can get you some Greggs
16:35Yeah, can you get me some Greggs, please?
16:41I've got some little Greggs. I've got one more big Greg coming
16:43So what I'm thinking is
16:47Well, it's a classic case of a gutter of Greggs
16:52Yes, Alex
16:53I've got a Gregg for you
16:54Oh, this is good stuff
16:56The Gregg for your gutter
16:57This is great
16:58Gregg
16:59This is Gregg, sorry
17:01Ladies and gentlemen
17:03I'm proud to present the most impressive load ever carried by man or woman
17:08Feast your eyes
17:11On the one and only
17:13Gutter of Greggs
17:19Yes
17:20Yes
17:20Yes
17:32Ladies and gentlemen
17:34There is nothing we can't do
17:37With a gutter of Greggs
17:42That's your time up, John
17:43Thank you, Alex
17:45Bye-bye
17:47APPLAUSE
17:50You think appealing to my ego is going to get you points on the show, do you?
17:55Yep
17:55Very wise
17:57LAUGHTER
17:58Well, you just have to work out how impressed you are
18:00So, first of all, Sophie and Joanne, who look like this
18:04Yeah
18:05LAUGHTER
18:07And then the three gentlemen did these things
18:10Oh, that's... yeah
18:11We have Nick
18:12Come on, that looks good
18:13Why have they blurred the cow's face?
18:15LAUGHTER
18:16We have Steve
18:17That doesn't look as good as I remember, Steve
18:19LAUGHTER
18:20And then we have John's
18:22It's a bit much, though, isn't it?
18:24It is
18:24Yeah
18:25Sorry, Joanne, yours is the least impressive final load
18:29LAUGHTER
18:29One to John
18:30Five
18:32Two points for Sophie
18:33Three for Steve
18:34The narrative was impressive
18:36OK
18:36I'm showing humility by giving four points to John
18:38And I'm sorry
18:39The final image that I found the most impressive
18:42Was old snooker cube umbrella chin
18:45And I stand by it
18:46Five points for now
18:46APPLAUSE
18:47Well done
18:50Can you tell me the skills?
18:52Yes, Sophie and Steve, both on five
18:54John and Nick, both on nine
18:56APPLAUSE
18:57And Joanne as well
18:59APPLAUSE
19:02What is next, young fellow, my lad?
19:04Ooh, well, let's just sit back and have a right laugh
19:06Watching the Fresh Prince of Midair
19:09LAUGHTER
19:22MUSIC PLAYS
19:24What on earth is going on in here, then?
19:27Oh!
19:29Oh, that's clever, isn't it?
19:32Ooh, yeah
19:34Wow
19:36It took me a while to get it just right
19:38Yeah
19:40Magic
19:41Lovely
19:42Love it
19:44Hi, Nick
19:44Hi, Alex
19:46Could you turn the hairdryer off?
19:47It's a bit noisy
19:48Yeah, sure
19:49Ooh
19:50LAUGHTER
19:52That is very good
19:53Yeah?
19:55Oh, I saw that
19:57Pardon?
19:57Cheeky
19:58What do you mean?
19:59The string and the...
20:00There was a lot going on there
20:01LAUGHTER
20:02Oh, I did it too early
20:06LAUGHTER
20:08LAUGHTER
20:10Take the most dramatic photo of yourself in mid-air
20:13You have 15 minutes and may take five photos
20:17In mid-air?
20:18I've never been a good jumper
20:20Your time starts now
20:23This is going to be a health and safety ball ache, isn't it?
20:26LAUGHTER
20:26The most dramatic photo of yourself
20:29So what I'd love is to get the hair bands that they wear, the really bad knives to your head
20:35Do you have to be actually mid-air or could you be pretending to levitate?
20:40We've got a hairdryer
20:42We have got a hairdryer
20:45Whoa!
20:46No, no
20:46Um, yes
20:48OK
20:49I've been doing a selfie on the top of a very tall building
20:52I've fallen and I'm plunging as I'm taking the selfie
20:57I'll have a wander
20:57Yeah, see what strikes you
20:58I'll have a wander and a think
21:01Photos of yourself in the air
21:02Right, I'm going to have a wander round
21:04Yeah
21:07Yeah
21:08Yeah
21:08That hasn't been very helpful
21:09Yeah
21:12APPLAUSE
21:14You've got a history of jumping, Sophie?
21:17No, I'm not a great jumper
21:18I'm more of a slut dropper
21:20LAUGHTER
21:20I'm very floor-based with my moves
21:23OK
21:23Joanne?
21:24I do all my own stunts
21:26Yeah?
21:27Oh, wow
21:27Always have, always will
21:29I enjoy the adrenaline
21:32Highest you've ever jumped?
21:33You know, I'm not great on measurements now
21:35I'd say, like, a metre
21:36LAUGHTER
21:38Shall we all have a little jump?
21:40Yeah, why not?
21:41Shall we all have a little jump?
21:42Nick, you may as well sit down
21:43No, I'm quite good
21:44LAUGHTER
21:47Three, two, one, jump!
21:49It wasn't it?
21:50It wasn't it?
21:52It wasn't it?
21:53APPLAUSE
21:54APPLAUSE
21:54I apologise
21:56Can you see them in the air?
21:57Well, we're going to see the montaging first of all
21:59and then we'll see the photos
22:00So, enjoy this, Greg
22:02Right, well, we need to light a fire
22:03We can light a fire
22:04Good
22:05Let's light a fire
22:08Right
22:09Now, Alex, I might need a bit of help
22:10OK
22:11Want me to come with you?
22:12Yeah, please
22:12Yes
22:15Now, I've been experimenting with how to get some g-force into my face
22:19Of course you have
22:20I thought this would be quite a nice...
22:23Huh?
22:24Do you feel g-force in my face?
22:27Horrible
22:27Ah, yeah
22:29Wow
22:31It's my big day
22:32How's the day gone?
22:33It started out OK
22:34Things took a turn
22:36Yeah
22:37One
22:37Two
22:38Two
22:38Three
22:39Go
22:41LAUGHTER
22:46Hang on, hang on
22:55Right
22:56I got my parachute
22:58You what?
22:59My parachute
23:00LAUGHTER
23:03Ready
23:05Good luck
23:06Thank you
23:06Good luck
23:07Good luck
23:09Thank you
23:11Oh, no, I'm gonna...
23:12You're gonna need to take anything higher up, Alex
23:16Go!
23:18Go!
23:23I'm gonna give you some g-force
23:25Just...
23:33You ready?
23:34On your marks?
23:35Yeah
23:35Go!
23:44Yeah, not bad
23:49Can you justify to me that you were in mid-air deck?
23:53You know when you put just a few things in a washing machine and it's going around quite slow
23:56They sort of there is a moment where they sort of suspend as it's kind of yes, of course
24:00They are in technically in mid-air
24:01So that's what you were hoping for the way I interpreted it. Yes was I was watching a father of
24:06three rammed into some tires
24:08Being pushed into some baked bean cans
24:14Here is Nick dramatically in mid-air
24:23I mean you arguably could couldn't be less midair
24:28Who's can we see next jilted Joanne I?
24:33Think you might be back in the game taskmaster is proving to me that I have the creativity of a
24:38wheelie bin
24:41So this is a jilted bride on her wedding day. She's just found out her husband's riding the nanny
24:49She's just had laser she just had laser eyes
24:53On the way to the wedding. God, she's had a bad day hasn't she?
24:57It's a hell of an image if you want to see the rest of their mid-air pictures you're gonna
25:02have to come back
25:03Promptly and if you're off for a poo do factor in the wipe. You never factor in wipe time
25:07Well, I'll give you back
25:18Hello and welcome back to another life-affirming episode of taskmaster
25:22We're partway through seeing some dramatic mid-air pictures aren't we Alex?
25:25Oh, we sure are and Nick rolled around in some tires
25:28The next picture is the one taken by Sophie in midair. I mean I cannot wait
25:34Oh
25:42Was it another shed panic did you want to plan this I've been wanting to get in that pigeon head
25:47from the moment I saw it
25:48People do people do
25:51And how nice for once that it's the pigeons themselves that are covered in shit
25:57All right, who's next do you want to see robins in flight, please?
26:03Blood yeah
26:05That's good. He's been shot out of the cannon. He's going towards a little bucket of fire. No eye patch
26:10though
26:13I'm
26:13Did you get in a cannon? Yeah
26:17You really want this don't you?
26:20Look at the air look at the air I've got I'm pleased with that you've got nice air you've got
26:25a bucket of fire
26:26You've got a pretend cannon and you've got that prick. There's a lot there
26:30Who's next? The final one have a look at Steve Pemberton in midair
26:43Oh
26:43It's a failed parachute. It's a failed parachute. I like the cut rope that's drama. Yes, this captures the moment
26:50of realization that he's going to splat
26:54See the g-force. I hope that they would have painted out the elastic band
27:00You would hope they would have made it look like you're in midair
27:05I
27:06Put all five up to you Greg and then you can book out which is the most dramatic
27:10Christ, okay, well, let's let's deal with Nick first of all right
27:16It looks at like a completely different task
27:20You're welcome. Thank you, and then there's got to be a jump up. I'm gonna give John Joanne and Steve
27:26four points, but I'm gonna give that
27:30Insane pigeon madness fight. I don't know why I just think it's the most dramatic because possibly because I'm worried
27:36about her state of mind
27:42Let's try and squeeze another one in shall we oh vicar isn't it
27:48One more than and it's a tie
28:04Oh
28:04Jesus hey, John. Hi Alex. I have a little lie down
28:12Oh
28:13Hello
28:14Hello. Oh, hello. Make yourself comfortable. I shall
28:18Oh lovely. It's nice of a lay down isn't it?
28:24Okay, I'm quite
28:27Tired
28:29There goes the task. Shall I get it now? Can you reach? Yeah
28:35Oh
28:36And I've got a tie is a bonus
28:38Oh, she's nice tie yourself to the bed most tidal person wins
28:44You must be horizontal
28:46Whilst in the lab if you pull down the terrible tie you are disqualified
28:51Well, how do I know which is a terrible tie? Oh, you'll know your time starts now
28:58Is is is going up like that horizontal? Going up like what? Like that? Oh, no, that's not horizontal
29:04Is that horizontal? No
29:05So this is horizontal? That's horizontal
29:07So I need something to help me access
29:09I'm just out of reach, Alex
29:13How the fuck do I take them down?
29:22I
29:22Sometimes wonder whether you knew that the what the show was that you were signing up to
29:27They said the last you watched it the better
29:29That's what they said
29:32You do fairly regularly seem incredulous about being asked to do things
29:37Let's just have a look at it
29:38Okay, well, we're going to start with Jay and Jay
29:40No, not the American Multinational Pharmacutical and Medical Technologies Corporation
29:45It's Joanne and John
29:46Can I levitate? I can't I'd have to levitate myself up
29:50If you could levitate horizontally that would be perfect
29:52This is a bad idea
29:55That's not a good idea
29:56Don't hit yourself in the face with a buckle
30:00What do you need? I need the ties
30:01Yeah, I obviously can
30:02Oh, no, thank you
30:05Ah, for God's sake
30:11Ah, thank God
30:13Here we go
30:14Doesn't look terrible to me
30:16This is real 80s dad vibes, isn't it?
30:19Is that tied to the bed?
30:20Yeah
30:20Oh, no
30:24Some of the ties seem to have prayers on them, Alex
30:26Is it a prayer?
30:28Why do you think it's a prayer, John?
30:30What else are you going to write on a tie?
30:32That is Welsh
30:33How do which will o'clock, go on Beth, man, go on out, carry all in line
30:42This is something for like a really low-end brothel, isn't it?
30:46I hate the low-end ones
30:47At what point are you going to start tying yourself together?
30:50Maybe I'll make a start
30:51It's kind of like a survival course, but I'd actually rather drink a jar of piss than do this
30:56Right
30:57I'll cut it down
31:08Ah, this is good
31:12I don't know why I stayed the one way round for so long
31:16All right, you have still got one minute
31:21Is that the terrible tie?
31:23Pedwick, Wheeler, Clock, go on a Beth, man, go on a carry all yamlins
31:29You've got 20 seconds
31:30This better not be some snuff movie now
31:36Two on the head and one on the wrist, is it?
31:38Okay, I'm just going to just check on the on the ties
31:45You're so mean, yes, it's tied
31:48The rest are good, Joanne
31:50Thanks, John, you seem pretty tied up
31:59I'll be in my draft
32:06I'm so sorry that I can't give extra points for the for your exit
32:09Because it was really impressive
32:12They didn't stop me, no one said they'd untie me
32:15At one point you announced that the experience was like a low-end brothel
32:18Yeah
32:19At the time you were a woman tied to a camp bed with one tie
32:24Lazy brothel of middle-aged men
32:27But she did well, she's got a lot of ties on
32:29Yeah, she tied herself up with 15 ties
32:31Now, John was two on the hands, one on the wrist
32:33And then ten ties all tied together to make one long tie rope
32:36Which went round his middle and his chest
32:38Good
32:39Who's next?
32:41Okay, now it's for a tie between Bolton and Leeds
32:44It's Sophie and Nick
32:46I'm just going to strategise here first
32:48Okay, how long are you going to strategise for?
32:50Um, just a second
32:54I think I'm done
32:57You must be horizontal
32:58Sophie, does that mean that my sort of back has to be parallel to the floor?
33:02Exactly
33:02I could be on all fours, couldn't I?
33:04That's loud, isn't it?
33:06That's horizontal
33:07There's something I've missed, isn't there?
33:09Because this is what you kind of
33:12You know, this usually how it works, isn't it?
33:15There's something I've missed in the room
33:17He didn't say I need to use a tie to tie myself to the bed
33:21That was the trick
33:23Whilst in this room, I've got it, but I know what I'm doing
33:26Make sure you're horizontal
33:27Um, I am
33:28Quite a full there, so be careful
33:29Ooh, yeah
33:31Horizontal
33:32But then as soon as I've left
33:33I can actually be any
33:37How long have we got, Greg?
33:38Pardon?
33:39Yeah, Alex
33:41No-one's ever called me Greg before
33:42Ever in the whole show?
33:43Ever in the whole show
33:44I've been waiting, thank you
33:45Right
33:49Hello
33:52Right
33:52Oh
34:00I've got a lot of rub and no way of doing it
34:04I feel like there's something I've not got right here
34:07Tie yourself to the bed
34:09You've got to be horizontal whilst in the lab
34:12Whilst in the lab?
34:13I can't get out now
34:15You've got three and a half minutes
34:23I mean, I don't know what this is gaining me
34:28Um
34:31I don't think I've done this one right
34:37One minute left
34:38Yeah
34:40Thread it through
34:41Thread it through
34:42Are you threading it through?
34:44Yeah
34:44With the bed on over me
34:45So there's no way I'm not roped in here
34:49Looks quite well, actually
34:50One minute left
34:51Right
34:51Oh, God, quick
34:52Yeah
34:57No
34:58Um
35:01Oh, so close
35:05So are you still tied to the bed?
35:06Very much
35:07I mean, it was a very efficient tie
35:08Yeah, too efficient, really
35:12There we go
35:14Bye then, Nick
35:15See you later, Alex
35:17I'll get the door, don't worry
35:18No, I am stuck now, I think
35:29My favourite moment of both of those is just hearing Nick's little voice say
35:33I don't think I've done this one well
35:35I can't actually see my face at that point, but I was crying
35:40Talk me through the strategy
35:41It was quite good, I thought
35:42I don't think I had one, really
35:43You went and got a robe
35:45I did
35:45Just crawled about and got a rope and tied myself up
35:48Well, don't talk yourself down
35:49You saw what, Nick?
35:49No
35:51What was going through your mind when you were crawling around on the floor of the camp bed structure?
35:56I felt like a woodlouse that had inverted itself and just couldn't get back
36:00Once I, once I flipped, I just couldn't, there was nothing I could do
36:06But what I'm interested in is why did you flip?
36:09Yeah, well, it's a good question
36:11Yeah, yeah
36:13That's another part done, join us for part four
36:15When one lucky winner has to look happy on stage with a deflated Che Guevara balloon
36:20This is prime time, baby, they can't take the BAFTA off us now
36:34Hello
36:34Hello and welcome back to Taskmaster
36:36It's the last part of the show and there is a tricky tie task which needs completing
36:40That's right, Greg, they're trying to tie themselves up as best as possible while lying horizontally
36:45But if during the process they pull down the terrible tie, it's all over
36:50Finally, a man perhaps best known for his role as Mattis in Free Jimmy the 2006 animation
36:54Which also starred Woody Harrelson
36:56It's Steve Pemberton
36:59Oh, now you're talking
37:01I want to hire the bed
37:02So if I come off here
37:05I thought there'd be a way to screw
37:12Is this the horrible one?
37:15Oh, it's something in Welsh
37:19Oh, it's a big thing
37:19Gah!
37:22This is like sort of hook a duck, but
37:27With ties and lying down
37:29I want different body parts involved
37:31Oh, thank you, God
37:33The tie gods are shining down on me
37:36Oh, thank you
37:39Yeah, oh
37:43Ah
37:45I can't keep up with the number of ties the tie gods are giving me
37:49It's a whole tirade
37:5320 seconds
37:53Okay, I think I'm done to enjoy it now
37:56Five seconds left
37:59But if you could leave the lab now, that'd be great
38:08He was so violent with the mechanism
38:10He whacked it and he put it off at an angle
38:12So they couldn't they had nowhere to go but fall on top of Steve
38:14And he tied 28 ties
38:17Attached himself to the bed
38:18Or each of his fingers was tied up
38:19Individual fingers, mouth, head, pelvis
38:22Not through the pelvic bone, but
38:24No
38:25I mean, do you want to win or not?
38:29Let's talk about this Welsh tie business
38:31They weren't prayers
38:32No, they were my family mottos
38:33There's the green one
38:34That's the one that Joanne got
38:35And obviously that says
38:37Know what you want and have the confidence to go after it
38:39That's what I wore on my stag night
38:40No
38:42Joanne and John both got the yellow one down
38:44Don't wash the clock
38:45Do what it does
38:46Keep going
38:47I wore that on my wedding day
38:49Purple
38:49Steve got the purple one
38:50Which says whoever is happy will make others happy too
38:53And then the red tie of course
38:55My dad's tie
38:57Which says
38:57This is a terrible tie
38:59And that was brought down by Mr Steve Pepperton
39:04Of all the ties to rain down on me
39:07Poor Steve is out
39:08I liked Sophie's attempt and I thought the rope was impressive so I'm going to reward it
39:12Woo
39:13Most tied up person wins
39:14She was the most tied up person
39:15Yes
39:16And then we'll do it according to the amount of ties
39:18That were you so okay
39:19Well it's two points to Nick
39:20Three to John
39:20Four to Joanne
39:21Five points to Sophie Willen
39:23All right
39:25CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
39:28Do you want me to look at the scores?
39:29Yes Sophie's got a chance of winning
39:30She's on 15
39:31John is on the top with 16 points
39:33Ah
39:33Still ahead
39:39All right
39:40Well here we are
39:41Make your way to the stage
39:42Final task of the show
39:43CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
39:50What's cooking good looking?
39:51Who's reading the task out?
39:53I think Steve Pemberton's going to read this one out
39:55Is he?
39:56Oh yes
39:58Park a vehicle in the parking bay
40:00Your vehicle must be rolled whilst standing on the spot
40:04And the worst parker each round is eliminated
40:07It's a parking challenge
40:08We have four parking bays there
40:10So in round one you've got to try to park one of these vehicles
40:13In parking space number one
40:15So you can now write down what order
40:16You want to park your vehicles
40:19As always happens in this show Greg
40:20The person in the lead goes first
40:22On this occasion it's John
40:24So John you have selected the car
40:25Yep
40:26You must stay on the gold circle
40:28You're aiming for parking bay number one
40:30John park that car
40:38It's not a bad start
40:40It's popped into two
40:43Right it's Sophie next
40:45Bring your little version of yourself with you
40:48That's lovely
40:52No
40:53No it's gone too far
40:54Fuck
40:58It's not a disaster
40:59It is a bit let's promise
41:01It's not great
41:03Nick you're up next
41:05And you've selected the buggy
41:07Yes
41:07You just you can just slot your little legs
41:10My own
41:11My own
41:11Well either
41:12Fine
41:17That's a bit clever
41:17Found it clever
41:20He's definitely made it through to round two I can tell you that
41:22Yeah
41:37Oh yeah
41:37Right. Finally, it's Steve Pemberton. What have you selected, first of all?
41:40I've selected the trolley.
41:43OK.
41:47Yeah.
41:49Is it enough?
41:50Let's have a look.
41:52Arguably, Sophie's only chance at winning an episode
41:55has just been dashed against the rocks.
41:58Unfortunately, Sophie, you've been eliminated in round one.
42:01Have I?
42:01And I must take small Sophie away from you.
42:04No.
42:04Yeah.
42:06Sit on the bench of shame.
42:10Sit on the what?
42:11The bench of shame.
42:12Right, round two.
42:13But, John, you're up first.
42:14You've picked the trolley.
42:15So, if you want to mount the trolley.
42:24This is another one.
42:25Aiming for number two, of course.
42:27Oh!
42:27Oh, gosh, yeah.
42:30It's hard to get the balance right with that trolley.
42:33Yeah.
42:36Parking bay two.
42:37Nick, also with a trolley.
42:41Oh, God.
42:42Confident.
42:43Oh, my God.
42:44Oh, this is good.
42:50That was a wreck.
42:53Joanne, you've selected the car.
42:55Do you remember what happened the first time the car was used?
42:58It went too far.
42:59So, what are you going to do?
43:01I'm going to win, Alex.
43:12I've got to say, despite being in the drop zone, I didn't want to see that.
43:18Steve, you're up.
43:19What have you chosen?
43:20I've chosen the buggy.
43:22You step on that board, I'm going to come up there like a windmill.
43:26LAUGHTER
43:30Oh, that's lovely.
43:31This is looking good.
43:32That is lovely.
43:38That is how you park a child.
43:41John's out.
43:43OK, it's the penultimate round.
43:49So, John, you're aiming for parking bay number three, of course.
43:51OK.
43:54Oh.
43:56It's very level.
43:58It's very level.
44:00That looks helpful.
44:02OK, you've seen how to do it.
44:04Good luck, Nick.
44:08APPLAUSE
44:14I think I'm out.
44:15Well, still, Steve, he just needs to not do that.
44:19The slightest shove will do it, Steve.
44:21What have you picked?
44:22I've got a horse as well.
44:23John, any advice on the horse?
44:24Just whack it right off the end.
44:29Oh, that's really good.
44:32Oh, it's...
44:32He's made it through your ass.
44:34Lovely.
44:36Greg and Fred, we have to say goodbye to Nick Muhammad.
44:43OK, so it's Pemberton versus Robins,
44:46and it's been a theme of the series so far.
44:48In the final round, you both push at the same time.
44:52Oh!
44:53A twist?
44:54Yes.
44:55Oh, my God.
44:57This to the glue factory now?
44:59Get in your vehicles, guys.
45:02Clear the nappet.
45:03Oh, that's lovely to see.
45:08You must roll on the whistle.
45:10I am genuinely excited.
45:12Yeah.
45:13Three, two, one.
45:16Oh.
45:17Oh, my God.
45:18Oh.
45:21Pemberton!
45:23Pemberton takes it!
45:34That is classic Pemberton!
45:38Well done, we'll add that to your final scores.
45:40Come down and join me.
45:40Well done.
45:47I tell you what, Pemberton can park.
45:50It's not me, it's the little guy.
45:52I have totted up the scores now, Greg,
45:55and those five points for Pemberton
45:57have very little bearing on the final scores
45:59because the third episode in a row has been won by Mr John Robbins!
46:03Oh, my God!
46:04CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
46:07John Robbins wins!
46:10Please pick up your extraordinary pictures!
46:14CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
46:16So, what have we learnt from today's show?
46:20Well, we all know that life has its ups and its downs,
46:23everybody has their struggles,
46:25but whatever you've been through, whatever you're going,
46:27always be worse.
46:29LAUGHTER
46:31That's us halfway through the series
46:33and this is your champion of the night,
46:36Mr John Robbins!
47:02CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
47:03LAUGHTER
Comments