- 6 hours ago
Mini Sex Education By My Best Friend Db
Category
🎥
Short filmTranscript
00:00:04New Intimacy Level Unlocked
00:00:11New Skin Dangerously Hot is Equipped
00:00:20You're staring. You like what you see?
00:00:23Maybe.
00:00:32When are you gonna tell me who you really are?
00:00:34You know who I really am. I'm Valaqueen33.
00:00:37Such a dumb username.
00:00:39Oh, okay guacamolewizard275. Don't talk to me about dumb usernames.
00:00:44You know, you're lucky you're cute.
00:00:45You don't even know what I look like.
00:00:47Well, I would if you agreed to meet me in person. Or at least a photo.
00:00:52Maybe someday.
00:00:57Crap, I'm late.
00:00:59Good luck, Skylacher Queen.
00:01:03Who needs luck when I have my talisman to remind me of my knight?
00:01:11In the game of Castle Claimers, I might be a warrior princess in love with a dashing knight.
00:01:16But on my first day at Edmunds Academy, I feel like a peasant.
00:01:21Watch it! This isn't public school.
00:01:25Forget your training wheels.
00:01:28At least I have my knight's charm to help me get through the day.
00:01:42Stop! Stop! Stop! Stop the car!
00:01:46No!
00:01:48God, my knight's special talisman!
00:01:51It's ruined!
00:01:58He's so hot!
00:01:59Hey! I told you to stop the car!
00:02:06Oh my god, he's cold!
00:02:07He's so hot!
00:02:12Hey!
00:02:14What is wrong with you?
00:02:15Didn't you see me yelling and screaming for you to stop the car?
00:02:18Okay, I see you now, new girl.
00:02:20What are you with me, son?
00:02:22What are you talking about?
00:02:24Why?
00:02:26I thought you were one of my fans.
00:02:28No, I'm not one of your fans!
00:02:31You just broke something that's really important to me!
00:02:34Yeah, I break a lot of hearts, buttercup.
00:02:36Okay?
00:02:39You should know that.
00:02:40I don't know who you are, but you were a...
00:02:43You were a...
00:02:47Asshole!
00:02:52Alright.
00:02:53I broke something of yours.
00:02:56Sure, but...
00:02:57Hey!
00:02:58You got my attention.
00:03:01So, in that case, we're even.
00:03:09Don't do it, Hayley.
00:03:12Have a good day.
00:03:15Don't do it!
00:03:17I got a hot mess energy.
00:03:20Hey!
00:03:23Oh, fuck!
00:03:25Now we're even.
00:03:27My last thought better not be broken!
00:03:29I can't lose my connection to Valley Queen.
00:03:36You just made the wrong enemy.
00:03:39You just made the wrong enemy.
00:03:41I'm going to make every classroom, every hallway, and every rumor in this school your personal nightmare.
00:03:50I'm gonna make her watch a living hell.
00:03:53What's going on?
00:03:54Close fighting the new girl.
00:03:56Close leaving the new girl.
00:03:58Yeah, idiot.
00:03:58I can see that.
00:04:01Just met an unhinged person.
00:04:03Good thing the universe balances it with you.
00:04:06Same.
00:04:07Ran into a certified asshole.
00:04:09Can't wait to see you in the game tonight.
00:04:14Cole, do you need help?
00:04:15I can help you.
00:04:18The new girl poured coffee on him.
00:04:20This bitch thinks that she can just roll up and piss off Michael.
00:04:23But he's not your Cole.
00:04:24Shut up, Lindsay.
00:04:26He's not yet.
00:04:30Hi!
00:04:32I'm Jen.
00:04:33And this is Lindsay.
00:04:35Hi.
00:04:36I'm Hailey.
00:04:37So nice to meet you.
00:04:38You have first day jitters.
00:04:39It's totally understandable.
00:04:41We want to make sure you feel really welcome.
00:04:43And so we'll take you to your locker.
00:04:44Come in.
00:04:46Okay.
00:04:46Let's go.
00:04:51There you go.
00:04:52Thanks so much.
00:05:14Aw, you're welcome, new girl.
00:05:16Honestly, it's kind of an improvement on your face.
00:05:24Guacamole wizard.
00:05:26Guacamole wizard.
00:05:26What are you, catfishing some little lonely online gamer boy?
00:05:30I'm giving back.
00:05:32Hold on.
00:05:34Hey, if you go to Edmunds Academy, you should come to Locker 83 right now.
00:05:38Send.
00:05:39Here.
00:05:40Now your little gamer friend can see your ugly little face.
00:05:44So when can I meet the hero who ruined your billionaire shirt?
00:05:47I'm your friend first, Max.
00:05:49At least check on me.
00:05:50Oh, is it the online love-up?
00:05:52Ah, chill.
00:05:53Please.
00:05:56No way.
00:05:58What is it?
00:05:59Oh, that'll clean goes to the school.
00:06:06Please ignore that.
00:06:08Someone stole my phone and played a stupid prank.
00:06:10Send.
00:06:15What is wrong with you?
00:06:16You mess with Cole Edmunds, and you're gonna mess with me.
00:06:19Edmunds?
00:06:20What?
00:06:21You don't know that his family owns the whole school?
00:06:24Wow.
00:06:24You really did crawl out of the gutter, didn't you?
00:06:28Stop recording me!
00:06:31Jen is a new girl.
00:06:33Wait.
00:06:34Is the new girl...
00:06:35Valley Queen?
00:06:38There's no way the new girl is Valley Queen.
00:06:40Could it be...
00:06:41Jen?
00:06:44Ew.
00:06:48Your enemy is our enemy, Cole.
00:06:50And I just made sure that the new girl knows that.
00:06:53No chance it's Jen.
00:06:55So is it...
00:06:56She does look kinda cute.
00:07:05Please ignore that.
00:07:06Someone stole my phone and played a stupid prank.
00:07:09What was I thinking?
00:07:11Of course she's not my online lover.
00:07:16Hey there, buttercup.
00:07:18Keep walking, Hayley.
00:07:20Just keep walking.
00:07:21You got a problem with shaving this morning, or...?
00:07:24My name's Hayley.
00:07:26Well, Hayley.
00:07:28I think you, uh...
00:07:29It means to spell on your upper lip right there.
00:07:34What a coincidence!
00:07:35So did you!
00:07:36Hell no!
00:07:40Oh, I'm sorry.
00:07:41I forgot you don't even need shaving cream.
00:07:44You're just a man-child with follicle issues.
00:07:49If your liver ends up with her, I must have failed an eye exam.
00:07:51Yeah.
00:08:04I was so relieved to see you.
00:08:06Something happened and I lost the game.
00:08:08I thought I'd never see you again.
00:08:11I think it's time we call this what it is.
00:08:14And what is this?
00:08:15What I think it is, is...
00:08:17I wanna be with you, and you wanna be with me.
00:08:22As more than just friends.
00:08:24Oh, thank God.
00:08:26I honestly want that more than anything.
00:08:28You're my soulmate.
00:08:29Like, I like you so much.
00:08:30Okay, well, since we're dating now, um...
00:08:34I'm ready to send my photo.
00:08:37Wait, really?
00:08:38Yeah.
00:08:39Get ready.
00:08:45Okay.
00:08:47No face.
00:08:48Just the boobs.
00:08:50Is it a bad idea?
00:08:51But all my online friends said it's cool.
00:08:54PG-13 nudes are harmless.
00:08:56All the kids do this.
00:08:57You'll love it.
00:09:02Ugh, this lighting hates me.
00:09:04Come on, Hayley.
00:09:06Confidence.
00:09:07You literally fight dragons online.
00:09:13Okay.
00:09:14Yeah.
00:09:15That's actually kind of...
00:09:20Oh my God.
00:09:22Seriously?
00:09:23Hello?
00:09:24Anyone?
00:09:26Don't look at me!
00:09:30Don't look at me!
00:09:31We're trying not for viable, are we?
00:09:33I don't think you're supposed to do it like that.
00:09:35Get out!
00:09:37Now!
00:09:37Fine.
00:09:39Ow!
00:09:40Damn it!
00:09:44Come on.
00:09:50Why?
00:09:54It's not good.
00:09:55Can we have any knives?
00:09:55For him?
00:10:06Hannity.
00:10:09Can I find a knife?
00:10:11He is.
00:10:11Yes?
00:10:13I can't find him, no.
00:10:14Oh my God!
00:10:14Can I find him?
00:10:17You're helping me.
00:10:19Yeah, well, I didn't point on it, but here we are.
00:10:28Excuse you.
00:10:29These boobs are for someone else.
00:10:31I love a boyfriend, do we?
00:10:32That is shocking.
00:10:34Yeah, actually.
00:10:35And he'd probably kill you right now if you saw him
00:10:37flirting with me.
00:10:38Flirting?
00:10:38Yeah, don't lie to yourself.
00:10:40I've got a girlfriend, too.
00:10:41My thoughts and prayers to her.
00:10:42Hmm, funny.
00:10:44Okay, well, can we just pretend this didn't happen
00:10:47and go her separate ways?
00:10:48Fine by me.
00:10:51Oh, and, um...
00:10:54Well, the purple bra, by the way.
00:10:56I like it in a weird way.
00:10:57I mean, I am my type, but, you know,
00:11:00power theory, whatever.
00:11:01Would you just get out of here?
00:11:11Hopefully, guacamole wizard will like it, too.
00:11:15Jen, red alert.
00:11:17Cole and the new girl are for sure flirting.
00:11:19I think it's time to take drastic action.
00:11:23Don't be a coward.
00:11:25Just send it.
00:11:26Jen.
00:11:30Oh, my God.
00:11:32Here goes nothing.
00:11:40Still no response?
00:11:42Don't freak out.
00:11:43He's probably just busy.
00:11:48Give it back.
00:11:49Why?
00:11:49You don't want me to see your slutty little nude?
00:11:53Oh, this is actually a really good photo.
00:11:55Honestly, it's so good that I think
00:11:56the whole school should see it.
00:11:58Did you get it, Lindsay?
00:12:00Got it.
00:12:03What are you doing?
00:12:14Oh, my God.
00:12:34Dude, your enemy's nude just got put up on the big screen.
00:12:36What?
00:12:36Yeah.
00:12:39Oh, my God.
00:12:51Come on.
00:12:53Let's see if these builds are photoshopped.
00:12:57Stop.
00:12:58Delete it.
00:12:58Please.
00:12:58Delete it.
00:12:59Strip.
00:13:00Strip.
00:13:00Strip.
00:13:01Strip.
00:13:02Strip.
00:13:02Strip.
00:13:03Strip.
00:13:03Strip.
00:13:04Strip.
00:13:04Strip.
00:13:05Strip.
00:13:05Strip.
00:13:05Strip.
00:13:11Oh, my brave knight.
00:13:12I wish you were here with me right now.
00:13:19Oh, my God.
00:13:20Oh, cool.
00:13:21Your enemy's kind of hot.
00:13:24Since you're so into slutty photos,
00:13:26why don't we just go ahead and go full nude?
00:13:31Jen, no.
00:13:31No, no, no, no, no.
00:13:32Jen, stop.
00:13:33Jen, stop.
00:13:34Jen, stop.
00:13:34Jen, stop.
00:13:34Jen, stop.
00:13:35Jen, stop.
00:13:35Jen, stop.
00:13:35Jen, stop.
00:13:35Jen, stop.
00:13:36Jen, stop.
00:13:38Jen, stop.
00:13:43Jen, stop.
00:13:47Jen, stop.
00:13:48Jen, stop.
00:13:51Jen, stop.
00:13:54Jen, stop.
00:13:54Jen, stop.
00:14:00Jen, stop.
00:14:01Jen, stop.
00:14:03Jen, stop.
00:14:05Jen, stop.
00:14:05Jen, stop.
00:14:05Jen, stop.
00:14:05Jen, stop.
00:14:05Jen, stop.
00:14:08Hi. You okay? Give that to me. Now give the phone back, Jen. What the hell, Cole? I thought
00:14:24you'd be happy. How does it feel being exposed to the whole school? Not good, huh? Now if
00:14:34you don't delete it off your phone, I'm exposed to what else is fake about you, and I know
00:14:38it's not just your purse. Why are you even defending her? She's the loser who has nude
00:14:43photos for random men. Amy's got more personality than all of you combined, and if you mess with
00:14:49her, you mess with me. You hear me?
00:14:55Haley, are you? Cole is on my side now? Is he doing this to play with my feelings? I just
00:15:01need to be
00:15:01alone. Haley! Cole is a rich asshole, and he said we were enemies. But why did I get butterflies
00:15:13when he looked at me today? Don't stay up too late, honey. Love you, Mom. Wait, Mom.
00:15:26Do people change? Like, can a spoiled brat somehow become nice? Well, maybe just give them
00:15:38a second chance.
00:15:56Tough day, huh? There's no more mozzarella sticks in the cafeteria. They're my favorite.
00:16:02Noted. Is that all? The whole school treats me like I'm their punching bag. I'm just trying
00:16:07to bring a little hope to my family and keep my scholarship. Oh, I'm really proud of you.
00:16:14And then there's this guy. He has this vendetta against me, but at the same time he's super contradictory.
00:16:19It's so confusing. Sounds like you're into this guy. Sounds like you're into this guy.
00:16:25No, I'm not into this guy. I like you. Only you. I really liked your photo, by the way.
00:16:36You did? Are you gonna reciprocate? I was thinking it would be better if we met in person.
00:16:41That sounds amazing. When? With? Well, after school. At the balcony. I'll bring flowers.
00:16:47Deal? I'm about to meet my boyfriend.
00:17:08Stop thinking about Cole.
00:17:18Call me father.
00:17:19I heard about you harassing Jen at school today. Defending that nobody. Haley girl.
00:17:25He's not a nobody, dad.
00:17:26Are those for her?
00:17:32What the fuck?
00:17:35What the fuck?
00:17:37I know what Haley is, Cole. Her mother works as a maid at my office. That whole family is trash.
00:17:44Stay away from her.
00:17:45What if I say no? Stay away from Haley Cole. Or I'll fire her mother.
00:17:51What if she found out that you were the one making her life miserable?
00:17:54I'm almost 18. Soon I'll have my inheritance. I hate to make Haley wait, but she can't know who I
00:18:00am before I make sure her family is safe.
00:18:04You're sick.
00:18:06It's called watching out for your future.
00:18:14Oh, hi. I'm Haley. Yes.
00:18:19So nice to meet you.
00:18:21God. I'd give anything just to hear her say my name. But the moment she knows, I lose her forever.
00:18:29Thank you for the flowers. You're so nice.
00:18:36Guacamole wizard.
00:18:38Fail.
00:18:41Guacamole wizard.
00:18:43Ew.
00:18:45You're waiting for your stupid little secret boyfriend?
00:18:48Pathetic.
00:18:49Maybe he's married.
00:18:50Or maybe he's fat.
00:18:52And maybe he's sitting on his back video.
00:18:55I don't want any more trouble.
00:18:58Why is guacamole wizard still not here?
00:19:01Oh no, we're not here to give you any trouble.
00:19:03We just noticed that you didn't have any lunch and so we thought we would bring you a sandwich.
00:19:08Eat it.
00:19:22Help me.
00:19:24So you think that you can just humiliate me in front of the entire school?
00:19:28You're a maid's daughter so you can go ahead and eat trash.
00:19:32Guacamole wizard, where are you?
00:19:35Oh and by the way, Nicole's not gonna come save you.
00:19:38Because after all, he's rich.
00:19:40Like me.
00:19:44I'm nothing like you.
00:19:50Yeah, I'm nothing like you.
00:19:53Cole again?
00:19:54Why is he always here when I need help?
00:19:57Pick it up.
00:19:58Cole, we were kidding.
00:20:00It's ketchup.
00:20:01Pick that bloody thing up.
00:20:06Take out of your phone and record this.
00:20:16Didn't your dad tell you not to mess with Hailey anymore?
00:20:18Don't think you have leverage here.
00:20:20Cause I'll tell your mom how fucked up you are.
00:20:22You wanna hold that thing next to your face and do what I say.
00:20:28I will leave Hailey alone.
00:20:32I will leave Hailey alone.
00:20:38Got it?
00:20:38Yeah.
00:20:39Let's go.
00:20:41What are you looking at?
00:20:45Got it?
00:20:46Let's go.
00:20:55Uh, thank you.
00:20:57Wow.
00:20:59Never thought I'd hear you say that.
00:21:03Why do you keep following me around?
00:21:05I just...
00:21:07I happened to see you.
00:21:09Were you waiting at someone?
00:21:11Yeah.
00:21:12My boyfriend, actually.
00:21:16Well, he...
00:21:17He kinda stood me up, so...
00:21:19Maybe you didn't do it on purpose.
00:21:23Maybe you gotta do it nice today.
00:21:25Cole, are you being nice to me?
00:21:28You thought we were enemies.
00:21:31I mean, I still find you incredibly annoying, though, so...
00:21:34Am I that annoying?
00:21:35Maybe you'll like me once you realize I have layers.
00:21:37Are you trying to play with my feelings, Cole Ednaz?
00:21:40Cause it's not gonna work.
00:21:41I'm like those stupid, spoiled heiresses.
00:21:49How'd that online boyfriend in your ears make you fall for her?
00:21:55He...
00:21:56He makes me feel safe.
00:21:59You wouldn't understand, though.
00:22:05You understand better than you think.
00:22:08Cole understands me better than I think.
00:22:13Does he...
00:22:14Why you touch him like this?
00:22:25If you keep staring, I'm gonna think you like what you see.
00:22:29No, my...
00:22:31My boyfriend has way better abs than you do.
00:22:36In the game.
00:22:38In the game.
00:22:39Oh, in the game, huh?
00:22:46Why does he have to smell so good?
00:22:52Are you a little slow in the game, too?
00:22:55I can see why he likes you.
00:23:07I can't do this.
00:23:10I love my boyfriend.
00:23:11And you will never understand that.
00:23:13He's smart, and he's kind, and...
00:23:16He loves me for who I am.
00:23:19That is so much more important to me than whatever this is between us.
00:23:23I wish I could just tell her right now.
00:23:25No.
00:23:33Wait.
00:23:34It couldn't be.
00:23:37Cole, what was that notification on your phone?
00:23:42There's nothing.
00:23:43Cole, who are you?
00:23:47What was that notification on your phone?
00:23:49It was my dad telling me my car got done getting waxed.
00:23:54Champagne problems, huh?
00:23:57You live such a tough life.
00:24:03What was I thinking?
00:24:04We are from two different worlds.
00:24:06He just wants to play with me.
00:24:08But why did I want to kiss him so badly?
00:24:15Why didn't you come to school today?
00:24:17I got into a car accident.
00:24:19Really? Are you okay?
00:24:21You have to keep me in the hospital till prom.
00:24:23He was right.
00:24:24Who?
00:24:25Nobody.
00:24:26Which hospital are you staying at?
00:24:27I want to come visit you.
00:24:29No, no, you can't. I look miserable now.
00:24:31You need to see me in style.
00:24:33Fine, if you say so.
00:24:36So, are we going to prom together?
00:24:38Hell yeah, we are.
00:24:40We send the fireworks wild.
00:24:44Why would anyone want to sit next to her?
00:24:47Whoever needs a charity case.
00:25:04Oh, you.
00:25:06Oh, me.
00:25:07Why is she so lucky?
00:25:09Cole's never been this way with any other girl.
00:25:12People think you're really lucky to be my lab partner.
00:25:15I'm sure you feel really lucky to be my lab partner.
00:25:17Because you don't do any homework.
00:25:24You finished it?
00:25:26It's okay.
00:25:27We'll get to know each other more.
00:25:29I'm a little bit curious about you, actually.
00:25:30I'm curious about you, though.
00:25:32Like, uh, how close were you with your mom?
00:25:36What is he trying to do?
00:25:38It's none of your business, but I'm very close with my mom.
00:25:41I'd kill anyone who hurts her.
00:25:55I'm sorry.
00:25:57I'm gonna do it.
00:25:58I'm gonna do it.
00:25:59I'm gonna do it.
00:26:05You're okay.
00:26:11I'm fine.
00:26:11I'm gonna do it.
00:26:13You are so full of yourself, you can do this on your own.
00:26:16Yeah.
00:26:19No way.
00:26:21It's a self-locking door.
00:26:23Really?
00:26:24Ms. Gorman's gonna be back in an hour, I'm sure it'll be fine.
00:26:26I'm stuck here with you for a full hour?
00:26:29Okay.
00:26:29Sorry, am I that bad?
00:26:31I think maybe we can pick up where we left off.
00:26:34Don't worry.
00:26:35Make me try something new.
00:26:37We're keeping our distance this time, actually.
00:26:39Yeah.
00:26:49That was my first kiss.
00:26:53My first kiss was not supposed to go like that.
00:26:56It was supposed to be special at prom and not just bumping lips.
00:27:10You're really good at this.
00:27:12One day when you regret it.
00:27:15You know, we can do more if you want.
00:27:32And I've been wanting back a lot more than you think.
00:27:36So you want me?
00:27:39I think you know much I want you.
00:27:45Do you want me?
00:27:48I want you.
00:27:53Oh shit!
00:27:57Anyone in here?
00:28:01Oh my god, how long have you two been in here?
00:28:04I really need to change this lock.
00:28:06Are you two okay?
00:28:07Oh.
00:28:08Yeah.
00:28:08Yeah, we're good.
00:28:10I think so.
00:28:10We're okay.
00:28:18You're just going to pretend like that didn't happen?
00:28:20What didn't happen?
00:28:21Hey, wait.
00:28:22It's just hormones.
00:28:24Jake.
00:28:26Can you still play after your accident?
00:28:28Relax, I'm not dead.
00:28:29Wait.
00:28:30Car accident?
00:28:31Guacamole wizard?
00:28:38I gotta go.
00:28:46Guacamole wizard.
00:28:48Huh?
00:28:50Are you all better after your car accident?
00:28:53Do I know you?
00:28:54Why is he being so standoffish?
00:28:56Is he trying to give me a surprise?
00:28:58Or he heard something about Cole?
00:29:01You're crushing your soda can.
00:29:04She thinks Guacamole wizard is Jake Myers.
00:29:06I was using a real car accident.
00:29:08According to you, so is Guacamole wizard.
00:29:12Cole, wait.
00:29:15Oh, shit.
00:29:20What's up, Gus?
00:29:23We were just chatting.
00:29:24Chatting about Jake's grand plans to kick balls?
00:29:28Was there something that you wanted, Cole?
00:29:31Hey!
00:29:32I just figured I'd bring you some mozzarella sticks.
00:29:35They're your favorite.
00:29:36Right?
00:29:38How did you know that?
00:29:40Tough day, huh?
00:29:41There's no more mozzarella sticks in the cafeteria.
00:29:44They're my favorite.
00:29:45He couldn't be Cole.
00:29:47Could he?
00:29:53The truth is, um...
00:29:54A dickhead?
00:29:57Would you honestly get out of here, bro?
00:29:59You came to my table, bro.
00:30:00And knocked my ball away.
00:30:08There it goes again.
00:30:10Cole is jealous.
00:30:11We got a problem here, Cole?
00:30:13We don't have a problem.
00:30:15We don't have a problem.
00:30:17Right?
00:30:17Tell Cole to get my ball, and we don't have a problem.
00:30:21Jake, it would take me forever to find one of your balls.
00:30:25I have the ball now.
00:30:26Can we stop measuring each other's dicks?
00:30:30Cole and Jake are fighting over Haley?
00:30:33Maybe I can use that.
00:30:37Jake!
00:30:38Hey!
00:30:39What if I told you that I have an internship opportunity for you with my dad?
00:30:43Wait, seriously?
00:30:44Yeah. Just one little catch.
00:30:46You have to pretend to like Haley Roth.
00:30:51Alright, you have the rest of the period to work on your lab reports.
00:30:54If you have any questions, I'll be at my desk.
00:30:57I thought Guacamole Wizard would feel more like Cole.
00:31:01But if he's really Jake, then maybe this was always going to end.
00:31:05You've literally been staring for five minutes.
00:31:07I'm thinking.
00:31:08About the report or about him?
00:31:10Why are you making it so weird about Jake?
00:31:11We literally made out of a sore dream.
00:31:14Maybe I've known Jake longer.
00:31:16No, you don't.
00:31:18How do you know that?
00:31:18You're going to prom with someone else.
00:31:20Stop acting like you're serious about me.
00:31:22You have no idea.
00:31:28Oh my god, is Jake asking me to prom?
00:31:44Haley, someone's here to see you.
00:31:58Are you asking me to prom?
00:32:01Too cheesy?
00:32:02No, it's cute.
00:32:04The accident?
00:32:06The mozzarella sticks?
00:32:07He is Guacamole Wizard.
00:32:09So, um, what do you think?
00:32:12You want to go to prom with me?
00:32:14I...
00:32:14I should feel happy.
00:32:16But why does this feel so wrong?
00:32:20Hey, can we not?
00:32:24Hey, can we not?
00:32:26Dude, seriously, what is your problem?
00:32:28My problem here, dude, is that me and my lab partner have work to do.
00:32:31And you're out here to strike me with bad puns.
00:32:34Wow.
00:32:35That is some weak shit, man.
00:32:38That's weak shit?
00:32:39Is this weak shit?
00:32:40What?
00:32:43Oh my god.
00:32:51Wow.
00:32:52He's got really pretty eyes.
00:32:59Wait, I can't.
00:33:01Colt, put me down.
00:33:02Put me down.
00:33:05Don't do that again.
00:33:19New couple alert.
00:33:21Fuck off, Jen.
00:33:23Why do you hate me so much, Colt?
00:33:24You and I, we're not that different.
00:33:26And if you'd realize and give me a chance, I think that we would make a great match.
00:33:31Like, say, if you asked me to prom.
00:33:34I might say yes.
00:33:37Jen, you wanna go to prom with me?
00:33:41Jen, you wanna go to prom with me?
00:33:44We're both hot and we're both rich.
00:33:46And our dads have been in business, like, forever, so...
00:33:50How romantic.
00:33:51I think I'll pass.
00:33:54You're gonna regret this, Colt Edmonds.
00:34:01If I message Corcomole Wizard, I wonder if Jake's phone will ding.
00:34:07What should we wear to prom?
00:34:09And the Dean's List.
00:34:19Um, I'll talk to you later.
00:34:20I'll see you around school, okay?
00:34:21Okay, yeah, I'll see you later.
00:34:22Bye.
00:34:22Stay with me.
00:34:24Stay with me.
00:34:24He's so different.
00:34:25Maybe he's still recovering from the accident?
00:34:28Stay with me.
00:34:30Hayley?
00:34:39Geez.
00:34:41God.
00:34:46Here, I'll get it.
00:34:48Uh, no.
00:34:48No.
00:34:52Oh.
00:34:53You're scared of me seeing all the girls in your phone?
00:34:56I don't care.
00:34:57I do care.
00:35:00Here we are.
00:35:17You don't put a problem with Jake.
00:35:18I mean, he only knows you like mozzarella sticks because of me.
00:35:21He doesn't even know you.
00:35:23And you do?
00:35:24How do you know I like mozzarella sticks?
00:35:26That's something I've only ever talked about.
00:35:27Because I pay attention to what you like.
00:35:31Hmm.
00:35:32I noticed it at lunch.
00:35:34The first day.
00:35:36You were watching me?
00:35:38Just...
00:35:38Just don't go to promenade Jake.
00:35:54Move.
00:35:56Cole is talking to Hayley.
00:35:58Again.
00:35:58Your job is to keep them away from each other, Jake.
00:36:02Unless you don't want that internship that my dad got you.
00:36:04Obviously I do.
00:36:05Okay.
00:36:06Then break them up, idiot.
00:36:08Um...
00:36:09What do I do?
00:36:11I've got a few ideas.
00:36:17Hey, look.
00:36:19Someone will take you to prom.
00:36:21Alright, I promise.
00:36:22Yeah?
00:36:23Really?
00:36:23Like who?
00:36:24I mean, the whole school hates me.
00:36:25Except for Jake.
00:36:27And you.
00:36:28But you're not asking me.
00:36:32Hey.
00:36:33Oh, hey Jake.
00:36:35Hey Hal.
00:36:35Um...
00:36:36I just wanted to thank you again for...
00:36:38The other night.
00:36:40The other night?
00:36:42Yeah, it was...
00:36:44So...
00:36:45Sexy.
00:36:47You're so sexy.
00:36:49Jake, what are you talking about?
00:36:50I hate to break it to you asshole, but she's my prom date.
00:37:00And she's a real tiger in the bedroom.
00:37:04Oh!
00:37:04Oh shit!
00:37:06Look!
00:37:06Oh shit!
00:37:08Oh shit!
00:37:18Oh my god!
00:37:23Stop!
00:37:24Guys, stop it!
00:37:25Stop!
00:37:25Stop!
00:37:27What the hell is going on over there?
00:37:31Shit.
00:37:32It's Principal Stevens.
00:37:33I've got to save Cole.
00:37:34I mean, Jake.
00:37:35I've got to save Jake.
00:37:40Oh!
00:37:42Oh my god!
00:37:43Principal Stevens!
00:37:44I'm so sorry!
00:37:45Bailey!
00:37:46Bailey Rock.
00:37:47That's detention.
00:37:49After school.
00:37:50Don't be late.
00:38:07What are you doing here?
00:38:09Can we keep you company?
00:38:11It's the least I could do after you saved my ass today.
00:38:15The locker thing?
00:38:16That was an accident.
00:38:18Oh, sure.
00:38:21So, uh, you and Jake, huh?
00:38:25No.
00:38:27He lied about that.
00:38:28I don't know why though.
00:38:30Good.
00:38:31I know.
00:38:33Father that asshole, every time he looks at you makes me sick of my stomach.
00:38:37Thinking about him touching you, kissing you.
00:38:40I could kill him.
00:38:44Promise me you won't go to prom with it.
00:38:49Okay, fine.
00:38:50I won't.
00:38:53Because I want to go to prom with you.
00:38:57Okay, everyone.
00:38:59Let's start off by mixing our sodium bicarbonate.
00:39:08Oh my god.
00:39:09I am so fed up with this.
00:39:29Sorry.
00:39:30I tripped.
00:39:31No.
00:39:32No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no.
00:39:33Jack.
00:39:34What?
00:39:34It always has to be about her, doesn't it?
00:39:40They're dead.
00:39:41They're both dead.
00:39:42Oh.
00:39:44How am I going to be able to talk to guacamole wizard?
00:39:49Oh.
00:39:50What are you?
00:39:51Are you almost crying?
00:39:53It's probably because you can't afford a new one.
00:39:57Jen, what's going on over there?
00:40:09What's going on is Jen is getting a taste of her own medicine.
00:40:13Mrs. Gorman, it's burning.
00:40:14Mr. Edmonds.
00:40:15Oh, please.
00:40:16It's baking soda and water.
00:40:17You're fine.
00:40:18Detention.
00:40:19Today, after school.
00:40:20Oh.
00:40:21Shit.
00:40:33Jake, hey.
00:40:34Oh, uh, sorry.
00:40:36Gotta get to student council.
00:40:40Hey, you didn't even try the rice trick.
00:40:43The rice trick?
00:40:44The rice trick?
00:40:46Yeah.
00:40:48You don't know about the...
00:40:51Come on.
00:41:04Hey.
00:41:05Um, Ella.
00:41:07It's Emma.
00:41:09Yeah.
00:41:09That's what I said.
00:41:10Can you hack a broken laptop?
00:41:20Hey, it's gonna be okay.
00:41:23We'll pour out in a few more minutes and it'll be like the whole thing never happened.
00:41:27No, it's not just the phone or the laptop.
00:41:29It means...
00:41:30It means I can't...
00:41:32Can't what?
00:41:36I talked to a friend online.
00:41:38He's really important to me.
00:41:43And...
00:41:43I'm sure...
00:41:45You're really important to him.
00:41:55You know, Cole...
00:41:57If you look past...
00:41:58All that hair gel and...
00:42:01Big ol' ego and...
00:42:02Rich kid bravo.
00:42:03Okay, okay.
00:42:04I-I get it.
00:42:08You're kinda sweet.
00:42:13Hey, look at that.
00:42:16Oh, my God.
00:42:19Oh, my God.
00:42:21You're a miracle worker.
00:42:28Oh, what is taking so long?
00:42:30You doused this thing in sodium bicarbonate.
00:42:32Shut up, Ella.
00:42:34It's Emma.
00:42:35Whatever.
00:42:41Oh, my God.
00:42:49Oh, morning valley whore!
00:42:52How are things in the castle?
00:42:59Valley whore?
00:43:00What are they talking about?
00:43:16Guacamole wizard, when can we be together in person?
00:43:20Guacamole wizard, I want you so badly, I dream about you touching me.
00:43:24Oh my God, someone hacked my Castle Claimers messages.
00:43:27Touch me, guacamole wizard.
00:43:30Yeah, hey, Valley Whore, show them what you really like.
00:43:51Here you go.
00:43:53Here, this is for you.
00:43:58Oh, do you like what I've done with the place?
00:44:00You hacked my laptop?
00:44:03Oh no, it wasn't me.
00:44:04It was that kid, Ella.
00:44:06But I definitely got to reap the benefits.
00:44:08What kind of incel sex over a video game, Hayley?
00:44:11What are you, catfishing this guy?
00:44:13No, I'm not trying to catfish him.
00:44:15Hey everyone, I think Valley Whore is a catfish.
00:44:19Because who in their right mind would spend their time thirsting over you?
00:44:48Stop it, stop, stop!
00:44:52I thought I'd send the janitor some time.
00:44:57Jane!
00:44:59Hey.
00:45:01Now's the time.
00:45:03Tell them.
00:45:04Tell them what?
00:45:05That you're a guacamole wizard.
00:45:08Who's guacamole wizard?
00:45:11Here you go.
00:45:14Oh, my God.
00:45:15Did you think that Jake was your secret little online boyfriend?
00:45:18Oh, sweetie, I've been bribing him this whole time to pretend to like you.
00:45:23What?
00:45:23Why would you do that?
00:45:24Oh, I don't know, Cole.
00:45:25Why do you think I would do that?
00:45:29Jake, is this true?
00:45:30Have you been pretending to like me this whole time?
00:45:34Sorry.
00:45:36It was nothing personal?
00:45:42Yeah, nothing personal, huh?
00:45:45Oh!
00:45:46Oh!
00:45:50All right, all right, all right.
00:45:52Enough!
00:45:53What in the world is going on here?
00:45:55Is that a leaf blower?
00:45:57That's all him.
00:45:58Okay, well, you both have detention, so...
00:46:05Let me get this straight.
00:46:07You stole a leaf blower and defaced school property?
00:46:10It wasn't school property, Dad.
00:46:12It was Jen's cyber boy spreadsheets.
00:46:14Jesus Christ, how does she always get away with this shit?
00:46:17Could it be because her father's running for Senate, Cole?
00:46:20You think that's what it could be?
00:46:22Who cares?
00:46:22I care, and I hear she's got an eye for you.
00:46:27So you're taking her to prom.
00:46:29What?
00:46:29Not over my dead body.
00:46:31Oh, because you're like that Haley girl?
00:46:34I'm firing her mother right now.
00:46:36No, no, please don't.
00:46:37Please.
00:46:38Then you're taking Jen to prom.
00:46:40Max's dad called.
00:46:42He said he's having a party tomorrow.
00:46:43You're going to go, and you're going to ask Jen to prom.
00:46:47End of discussion.
00:46:53Come on, you big coward.
00:46:55Message him.
00:46:57Just do it, just do it.
00:47:00You must think I'm the biggest idiot.
00:47:09I could never think that.
00:47:16But I thought you were Jake.
00:47:18Please, can't you just tell me now?
00:47:19I think I've had enough public humiliation for one lifetime.
00:47:26I heard that guy Max is throwing a party tomorrow.
00:47:28If you want, I'll meet you there.
00:47:42Okay.
00:47:43You got this, Haley.
00:47:45Just take a deep breath.
00:47:46You got this.
00:47:48You got this.
00:47:51You look beautiful.
00:47:55Thank you, Mom.
00:48:15Hey, Haley.
00:48:16I'm glad you came.
00:48:17Hey, you look so pretty.
00:48:18Hi.
00:48:19Hey, Max.
00:48:20Your house is gorgeous.
00:48:22I mean...
00:48:23No, it's just my parents' blood, honey.
00:48:24You know they're upstairs watching The Last of Us right now?
00:48:26They don't care about shit.
00:48:28They don't care about shit.
00:48:28Get drunk, girl.
00:48:29Woo!
00:48:32Yeah.
00:48:43What are you doing here, Valley Whore?
00:48:47What are you doing here, Valley Whore?
00:48:47Looks like the catfish came out of the pond.
00:48:50Hey, everyone.
00:48:50Let's give it up for Valley Whore.
00:48:52Valley Whore!
00:48:57Jen, why are you doing this?
00:48:59What have I even done to you?
00:49:00To me?
00:49:00Oh, I'm actually concerned about our whole community because those little cringy messages on your
00:49:05castle game, those are concerning.
00:49:07Actually, I'm kind of a little bit of a perv.
00:49:10Did you know that, Haley?
00:49:12She's a little pervy princess.
00:49:14Pervy princess!
00:49:17Pervy princess!
00:49:19Pervy princess!
00:49:20Pervy princess!
00:49:23Hey, let's get perv'd tonight.
00:49:25Leave me alone.
00:49:27Is there a fire?
00:49:29Okay, we set off the alarm.
00:49:43Paul?
00:49:47I'm not gonna have one.
00:49:54Pervy has a fire!
00:50:04Darn me!
00:50:05Pervy princess!
00:50:21are you him would you stop trying to find your stupid little cyber boyfriend okay cole is not
00:50:29him anyways we are going to the prom together no i'm not yes you are it's okay you can be
00:50:36honest
00:50:36about your feelings so you too this whole time oh my god i am such an idiot hey wait wait
00:50:53please at least take my jackets you know if you really wanted to humiliate me you didn't have to
00:50:58go to the extra effort jen was doing just fine i wasn't trying to humiliate you then what were
00:51:02you trying to do i guess you obviously the white clothes were just an added bonus i knew i shouldn't
00:51:08trusted you now what about guacamole wizard what are you
00:51:22who is that just the devil get in the car
00:51:30i'm not going to ask you again cole get in the car
00:51:34dad can you just act normal for once and please introduce yourself to hayley
00:51:37i already assumed that's who this was i'm a servant so you're the scholarship trash that's
00:51:45hell-bent on ruining cole's life well i've got news for you young lady my son is going to marry
00:51:51a good
00:51:52girl from a respectable family and that's not you you will be forgotten you're a maid's daughter
00:51:59and your mom works for me stay away from him or i swear to god your mother is fire dad
00:52:07stop
00:52:08don't you touch my family i'll stay away
00:52:12hey come on you don't mean that
00:52:16i hate everything you stand for
00:52:19i hate your greed and your callousness and your elitist ideas of what you think a good person looks
00:52:25like i hate everything about you i hate all of it i don't want any part of it so cole
00:52:32go with your dad
00:52:36hayley
00:52:45no laptop and no phone for a week ever since mom died you've turned into this cold patriarch
00:52:51hayley not that's real love why do you have to make me so miserable
00:52:54i promised your mother i would make you a success son even if it meant saving you from yourself
00:53:07hi hayley i'm emma i know you are right i just felt kind of bad that i accidentally
00:53:15helped and ruin your life so i wanted to return your laptop to you goodness new
00:53:24oh wow thanks emma okay bye
00:53:33one down one to go you're so cool i know emma
00:53:38want to go to prom why not let's get these love birds together
00:53:49hi mr edmund
00:53:50hi max and max's friend sorry we weren't expecting you cole's grounded
00:53:56oh he is but it was his 18th birthday today what can i say max actions have consequences
00:54:05birthday or no cole is grounded
00:54:07well that really sucks because he he's uh also the president of the prom committee
00:54:13we were supposed to review budgets today
00:54:16cole my son cole reviewing budgets
00:54:20he's never reviewed a budget a day in his life well mr edmunds today could be that day
00:54:24and we just have to give him back this school sanctioned laptop so we can get back to his very
00:54:28important and very respectable budgetary work
00:54:40go away
00:54:44max what what are you guys doing here happy birthday cole
00:54:49i brought you my laptop and logged into your castle claimers account just get it back to me by tomorrow
00:54:53what what's going on dude it's your 18th birthday you can tell hayley who you are now you can be
00:54:59together
00:55:00just log into this stupid game and tell the girl who you love who you really are
00:55:06no i'll tell her myself stick me in your car
00:55:15i'm a wizard
00:55:19mom i'm fine i just need some time alone
00:55:30open the door wait what it's here
00:55:42it's you i should give you this to you a long time ago
00:55:48hayley i wanted to tell you who i was from the very beginning
00:55:51my dad threatened off all your mom and i had a really long time to tell you who i was
00:55:56i got my
00:55:57hair in this and i could protect you and your brainwain so you don't have to choose
00:56:13hey we are
00:56:15i understand that this changes things if you don't love me the way you
00:56:20you love guacamole wizard but i look i need you to know i love you
00:56:37cool i love you you do yes you idiot i've loved you for months
00:56:44i mean this whole guacamole wizard thing was so confusing though because i had to be loyal to him and
00:56:51but you're him you didn't expect her i i mean i i always hoped it was you
00:57:00until you hoped
00:57:03yes i hoped it was you you were always there for me
00:57:08you're hot now you're really fucking hot
00:57:16hey uh one of those things i said we could do
00:57:20yeah i don't
00:57:25take my clothes off
00:57:26yeah no don't worry
00:57:31i'm so beyond you
00:57:50okay so what do you think 10 out of 10 yeah yeah we'll do again i'll get sex with sex
00:57:58with me
00:57:58specifically i've only ever had sex with you specifically all right all right that's fair
00:58:04i'll uh i'll take that as a one
00:58:11what is my life now am i being nice to cole eggnance
00:58:16oh god now i fully expect you to continue to berate me endlessly and i'll just i'm just lost behind
00:58:23it
00:58:25there's always been lost behind it
00:58:26i'll see you in a minute now
00:58:36i think you know if it's prom or not
00:58:40but the real question is do you got a date
00:58:45cole are you asking me to prom
00:58:47oh i would have asked you earlier but jay kind of gave me to the gym
00:58:51oh god please don't mention his name again i don't want to hear it
00:58:54yeah you don't have to ask me once
00:58:56but i don't even have a dress
00:58:59later
00:59:04i just slept with cole edmonds and i'm in love with cole edmonds who would have guessed
00:59:12i thought only the best for my princess where did you get that uh i might have gotten you a
00:59:21dress
00:59:21on the off chance that you might have wanted to go to prom with me and maybe had nothing to
00:59:26wear
00:59:29of course i'll go to prom with you
00:59:35mr edmonds i didn't expect you to be here cole are you here cole are you here
00:59:44mr edmonds you can't just barge into my house like this
00:59:48i see you cole you are in big trouble
01:00:06hey uh you almost done in there you try changing into an evening gown and a bunch of thorny bushes
01:00:14okay i'm ready
01:00:27what do you think
01:00:31my god haley you are the most beautiful thing i have ever seen
01:00:37uh-uh-uh i just hunched over in a car mirror to do this lipstick you're not messing it up
01:00:42for at
01:00:42least 20 minutes 20 more minutes we're in
01:00:46thank you all for using the prom voting site to catch your votes i hear we have a winner
01:00:58and your 2026 prom queen is jen longfellow
01:01:05thank you guys so much seriously this makes the world to me i mean like who else would win right
01:01:15oh this is just the perfect moment
01:01:22oh my god that's haley and cole it was fun
01:01:28since where did you get kids
01:01:33hey or uh most time that's up no but who cares
01:01:40hell yeah
01:01:47i am the queen okay she's just a little pervy princess come on everyone say it with me
01:01:53pervy princess pervy princess pervy princess
01:02:03wait wait wait wait what are those those are texts between me and my dad
01:02:06make cole edmunds fall in love with you his dad's month is essential to funding my campaign
01:02:13don't worry daddy if i can't have him no one can i'm gonna destroy hayley roth's life is this real
01:02:23jen's crazy who did this who did this
01:02:30what you exploited me for a hacking job and didn't think i was gonna hack your phone you little skit
01:02:37you know jen as the principal i'm supposed to remain impartial and above all of this petty drama
01:02:46but quite frankly you are the worst and i think it's time that you are expelled from edmunds academy
01:02:54you can't do that i'm the principal so uh yes i can
01:03:07there was no internship you lied to me
01:03:23oh my princess finally has a crown now all i need is my handsome prince oh yeah no can do
01:03:31all i have
01:03:32to offer is a bowie knight with a chip on his shoulder and a awesome sense of humor oh how
01:03:40can i refuse
01:03:46oh no that's my dad
01:03:50we are going home right now you disobeyed me for the last time boy yeah i'm not a boy dad
01:03:58you talk all the time about wanting a man that's worthy of the family last name
01:04:02yet you can't see i've already become that man and it's because of hayley and you can accept that
01:04:09i'll make my own path and best believe me i can
01:04:13i'll say this that's the most backbone i've ever seen in you cole
01:04:20joy pro
01:04:27i am so proud of you
01:04:31i kind of done with all you being by my side that was terrifying it's not like we haven't slayed
01:04:38a
01:04:38dragon before no so i love you dale queen i love you guacamole wizard oh my god i gotta change
01:04:46that username and use that username yeah you do
01:04:49you
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