- 6 days ago
She's Not Homeless, She's Healer Goddess
Episode
Episode
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🎥
Short filmTranscript
00:00:02Healer goddess, hear my plea.
00:00:06Please, save my child.
00:00:23Rod of a sepulis.
00:00:43Rejuvenate.
00:00:51Praise! She is the healer goddess!
00:00:55No, please. Don't call me that.
00:00:58What?
00:00:59I'm just glad I could help.
00:01:04Here you go, miss.
00:01:09Why be weighed down by a throne when I can live amongst the common people and help those the most
00:01:13in need?
00:01:26You must be rushing off to go find your jewels, because only a sackless coward would hit a puppy and
00:01:31run!
00:01:34Aw, it's okay, little guy. I'll fix you right up.
00:01:44Right rewrites the wrong.
00:01:49Rejuvenate.
00:01:53See? Good as the day you can kick him out of your mother's womb.
00:01:59Come on, Cleo! Let's go!
00:02:06Come on!
00:02:06Come on, Cleo!
00:02:06You're getting away!
00:02:08Come on!
00:02:13Hey, hey, hey!
00:02:16Please!
00:02:17My brother's been in a coma the last two years.
00:02:21We have no idea what the illness is.
00:02:23If anyone can help cure him, we will pay you handsomely.
00:02:26The Elizander Armstrong!
00:02:27His military family basically owns the entire global stock market.
00:02:32He's so hot.
00:02:34Does he come with the money?
00:02:35Yes. He'll even marry you if you can cure him.
00:02:38Money. Fame. Power. It's all yours.
00:02:46Are we still moving forward, Miss Trixie?
00:02:48Yes. Give the presidential contract to Marissa.
00:02:52Oh, I have another call coming in.
00:02:55Grandma!
00:02:56I'm dying! Save me, Trixie!
00:03:00Grandma?
00:03:02Grandma.
00:03:03When are you getting married? I'm already a hundred years old.
00:03:07I'm gonna keep you healthy forever, Grandma.
00:03:09And Butch is still on deployment, so that's why I haven't been married yet.
00:03:16Oh, but why marry a vegetable when I can bang a younger stud like you?
00:03:22We're talking about my brother's life. I don't have time for jokes.
00:03:27No!
00:03:36Please go feed your dog, Miss. Don't let it starve like you.
00:03:39Oh, kind stranger. Let me repay you by granting you a wish.
00:03:43Grant me a wish? That you can barely feed yourself.
00:03:46The downfall of humanity. It all starts with the loss of faith.
00:03:51What?
00:03:52Oh, geez, this is giving me a migraine. Are you telling me to pray to God because we've been doing
00:03:58that?
00:03:58I'm telling you to have some faith in me.
00:04:01Okay, uh, I wish for you to cure my brother's illness. Can you do that?
00:04:07I can topple mountains and make a king out of a frog if I wanted to.
00:04:11Cleo, stay right here for a second.
00:04:13Don't go too far, Cleo.
00:04:18Hold still.
00:04:25What? My migraine's gone.
00:04:28Okay, then let's go. If you can cure my brother, he'll even marry you.
00:04:31Come on. Come on.
00:04:47How is he? What is the diagnosis? Remember, you will not marry him unless you cure him.
00:04:53I'm sorry. I don't know what this is.
00:04:55Aren't you the queen of medicine? You're supposed to be one of the best.
00:04:58Don't worry, General. I'm the angel herbalist and I have mastered all healing methods of the East.
00:05:05I can detect what condition your son has with just one needle.
00:05:26I have no clue what this is.
00:05:29Oh, it looks like the angel herbalist doesn't live up to her name after all.
00:05:35That's why we saved the best for last.
00:05:37Me, the witch doctor.
00:05:39I'll save your son, Lysander.
00:05:52He's not budging. There's no movement.
00:05:54Truly, I have saved thousands of patients all over the world, but I don't know what this is.
00:06:01Lord, I've scoured the earth for the best doctors. They've tried all these methods and they've all failed.
00:06:07If we can't save him, there's only one person who can.
00:06:12Who?
00:06:16The goddess of healing.
00:06:19Wait a second. You're not talking about the legendary goddess healing.
00:06:23That's correct. Her right rewrites the rond and her left leaves the bereft.
00:06:30That's her motto.
00:06:31It's what makes her a sage amongst mortals. We are nothing compared to her.
00:06:36She is eccentric and elusive. No one has ever seen her before.
00:06:41If this legendary healer is the only one that can truly save my son, I don't care if I go
00:06:47bankrupt.
00:06:48I will find her. James, come put out a bounty to the entire world.
00:06:54Whoever finds the goddess healer will give her five million dollars.
00:06:59There's no need.
00:07:13I'll save your son.
00:07:16Who the hell is she?
00:07:18Dad, she says she can cure Lysander.
00:07:20She's gonna save your brother? Don't be ridiculous.
00:07:23How can this shit-stained hobo cure your brother?
00:07:27Exactly. God, the unemployed are getting crazier and crazier.
00:07:31She's trying to scam her way into marrying the rich.
00:07:34Ew! She even brought a filthy dog with her.
00:07:38I bet it has fleas.
00:07:40That flea-infested dirty thing is your companion.
00:07:44Don't try to steal Lysander Armstrong from us.
00:07:50Don't touch him.
00:07:54They say don't judge a book by its cover, but I can see from all your faces that you've failed.
00:07:59So step aside. I'll take it from here.
00:08:02Could you hold this?
00:08:04Oh, you're not gonna touch my son.
00:08:07I'm the richest tycoon in this country and a former general.
00:08:11I know a gold-digging whore when I see one.
00:08:14I bet she's only here because giving blowjobs on the street corners wasn't paying enough cash.
00:08:20Who knows what an unskilled poor girl like her would do for some.
00:08:24A skinny-ass beggar trying to take advantage of Lysander Armstrong when he's unconscious?
00:08:30Ew!
00:08:32Disgusting.
00:08:33Go back to being a prostitute.
00:08:34Security!
00:08:35Get this STD-infested peasant out of here now. Let's go.
00:08:39If you throw me out, you're tossing away your son's last chance at life.
00:08:47Sir, we are at our wit's end trying to find a cure for Master Lysander into no avail.
00:08:52Maybe we should give her a try?
00:08:55You can always deal with her later if she turns out to be a fraud.
00:08:58Alright, I'll give you a shot.
00:09:00But I warn you, if you fail, I'll have your and your dog's head mounted on my wall.
00:09:07Is that any way to ask for help?
00:09:09You'd be blessed to have me.
00:09:12And I'm only here to repay your younger son's kindness.
00:09:15But since I'm not welcome here, I'll leave.
00:09:20Devon, come find me when you have a different wish.
00:09:22No, Miss Trixie, my brother is a hero to me. I can't lose him.
00:09:28Well, if he's a hero to you, then that means he must be a good person.
00:09:34My brother is a war hero who single-handedly saved this country from a terrorist attack.
00:09:38Also, he's great with puppies. He'd make a great husband.
00:09:44Who says I want to marry him?
00:09:45As if the number one hottest 30 under 30 would even dream of marrying a penniless bum like you.
00:09:52Only a lunatic would be crazy enough to marry her.
00:09:55I mean, look at her.
00:09:56Even if she cleaned herself up, you couldn't find an ounce of femininity on her.
00:10:02Only those cut from the lowest ranks were bigger over such trivial matters.
00:10:06Continue wasting your time.
00:10:07But I'm saving this patient.
00:10:19Oh, okay!
00:10:22What's happening?
00:10:24What are we doing?
00:10:27What are we doing?
00:10:35Oh!
00:10:35Oh!
00:10:36What the hell are you doing?
00:10:39I knew she was a perv!
00:10:41She's definitely trying to steal Lysander from us.
00:10:43Do you all not know that sweat can tell you everything that's medically wrong with a patient?
00:10:47Are you insane?
00:10:48Security, smash her face in for licking my son!
00:10:53He's born with congenital heart disease, has a peanut allergy,
00:10:56and the condition he has is called endogenic cryomorphy.
00:11:00Yeah, right!
00:11:01I mean, no way you got all that just from licking him!
00:11:04Oh, okay.
00:11:05I've studied every disease known to man, right?
00:11:07I even have the badge of universal medicine right here.
00:11:11And I've never heard of endo-cryo-what?
00:11:18This?
00:11:25It is worth nothing when I have the real thing right here.
00:11:28What?
00:11:29What?
00:11:30So you think that this crummy walking stick of yours is what?
00:11:34The rod of a sepulius?
00:11:35Why don't you go back to the homeless asylum where you came from if you're going to be this delusional?
00:11:41I agree.
00:11:42I mean, even if she does solve this medical mystery, what is the point as of doctors who have studied
00:11:48for years?
00:11:48We are all certified.
00:11:50But Lysander does have congenital heart disease.
00:11:54She's right about everything.
00:11:58Yeah, but if she just throws out a bunch of fake diagnoses, one of them is bound to be right.
00:12:03And again, there is no such thing as endo-cryo-what-what!
00:12:07Endogenic cryomorphy.
00:12:08Oh.
00:12:09And of course none of you have heard of it.
00:12:10Because I just discovered it.
00:12:13This condition only affects those with both CHD and a peanut allergy.
00:12:17The chances are a billion to one.
00:12:19A hundred times rarer than winning the lottery.
00:12:22But lucky for you all, you've hit the jackpot by finding me.
00:12:26What a bunch of baloney.
00:12:28I mean, you wouldn't be homeless if you were actually any good.
00:12:33Precisely.
00:12:34You are just a scamming prostitute.
00:12:36You don't compare to me, us, who actually studied real medicine.
00:12:41Listen, I bet you were too poor to go to real medical school.
00:12:45Oh, so she went to the super circus instead.
00:12:49And now she's here putting on this clown show coming up with fake diseases,
00:12:53which mean nothing if you can't wake him up.
00:12:56Is that supposed to be a challenge?
00:12:59Oh my God.
00:13:01If you three incompetent doormats want to show me up,
00:13:04I think you all should grow parts of your brain back.
00:13:07Which, by the way, that condition is called an encephaly.
00:13:11What is that supposed to mean?
00:13:13It means you're being schooled by me.
00:13:14And I'm about to walk all over your medical licensees.
00:13:19Then let's have a bet.
00:13:21If you can't heal him, we'll break your hands.
00:13:26And then you can't pretend to have healing hands anymore.
00:13:32These hands have saved more lives than all three of you combined.
00:13:37You're that desperate to get rid of your competition, huh?
00:13:40Miss Trixie, don't risk your hands for them.
00:13:43There's too many lives at stake.
00:13:47Don't worry. I got this.
00:13:51It's a deal.
00:13:54I'll save Lysander Armstrong.
00:13:56No one is dying on my watch.
00:14:04Lysander Armstrong has been in a vegetative state for two years.
00:14:11Are you stopping me because you're scared I'd actually succeed?
00:14:15Homeless or not, if you save my son, I'll give you everything.
00:14:27I'll even have Lysander, my heir, marry you.
00:14:30I'm not doing this for the money or for a wealthy husband.
00:14:33I just believe in helping good people and doing the right thing.
00:14:38Prepare a Jacuzzi set at exactly 113 degrees Fahrenheit.
00:14:41Wait, wait, wait, wait. What for?
00:14:43Don't listen to her.
00:14:45She probably stinks so bad that she just wants a bath to wash the homeless stench off of her.
00:14:50Firstly, this is called greatness.
00:14:53Secondly, even if you drown yourself in plastic surgery,
00:14:57you couldn't get rid of your own ugly moral character.
00:15:01What? Did you just call me?
00:15:05There's a man's life at stake here, and you're standing in my way.
00:15:10Don't don the mantle of doctor when you're only capable of harm.
00:15:14Now stop getting in my way, or I promise you,
00:15:17you will be bubbling at the mouth very soon.
00:15:20Oh, yeah?
00:15:21Hey, you wanna see real pain?
00:15:22Where's the dog?
00:15:23Well, put down the dog!
00:15:25With pleasure.
00:15:35Oh!
00:15:41Left leaves the wrong bereft.
00:15:48You don't deserve to call yourself a doctor.
00:15:53She's been poisoned!
00:15:56It was her!
00:15:57Do you see any poison on me?
00:16:00Medicine in the right hands can save lives, but in the wrong hands, it becomes nothing but poison.
00:16:06This bitch isn't good enough to take down the queen of medicine!
00:16:09Do you have one of your antidotes on you?
00:16:11Of course.
00:16:12I've saved entire civilizations with my antidotes.
00:16:16If I wanna save someone, even the grim reaper can't stop me.
00:16:35Why is she spitting blood?
00:16:37This wasn't supposed to happen!
00:16:38I thought you said even the grim reaper can't get in your way, angel herbalist.
00:16:43This is what I call...
00:16:45Malpractice.
00:16:47This isn't fatal. She'll live.
00:16:49But she deserves a little punishment.
00:16:51Well, where's the jacuzzi I asked for?
00:16:54Jacuzzi is ready?
00:16:55Right this way.
00:16:56Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait!
00:16:58What the hell is going on?
00:16:59You say you want your son to live on to give you tons of grandchildren, don't you?
00:17:03Then stop getting in my way. Every second counts.
00:17:08Let's go for a dip, shall we?
00:17:13General Armstrong, your family is the richest and most powerful in the nation.
00:17:19Are you really gonna let this hobo slut touch your son?
00:17:23Hold on. You two are going in there... alone?
00:17:27If you don't want these drooling vultures to see your son naked, then sure, invite everyone in.
00:17:32Alright, but I warn you, no funny business.
00:18:20You thought I would love to call me.
00:18:21You thought it was pretty good?
00:18:22Well, you thought it was pretty good?
00:18:23That's the taken.
00:18:24It's over.
00:18:24You thought it was pretty good.
00:18:25It's so much better than you, he says.
00:18:26Oh, can't you do that to the door?
00:18:28What's your reward?
00:18:28That's fine.
00:18:28That's fine.
00:18:32I'm self-recognizing.
00:18:38you really shouldn't leave your precious son in there with that homeless con woman general
00:18:43armstrong exactly what if she gets pregnant by him she could blackmail you for millions
00:18:50that's what i would do if i was that poor and then the armstrong family will be the laughing
00:18:55stock of the nation held for ransom by a homeless woman dad you can't seriously be listening to
00:19:02that we have to have faith where did you actually find this low light uh on the streets are you
00:19:11shitting me you found this bum on the streets are you nuts you don't know her you don't know her
00:19:17background she could be a psychotic murder that is it general you have to go in and stop this now
00:19:22you're right that's it i'm shutting down this clown show right now james let's go yes sir
00:19:38i told you all to stay out
00:19:45this is a critical moment for you we can't be interrupted otherwise we both die
00:19:54i'm not gonna let this homeless hoochie mama trap my son
00:20:00i'm gonna save him myself
00:20:06you see that general this isn't just a gull-dicking con woman this is a witchcraft
00:20:13i know what this is this is the dark witch i've heard of her she uses her dark magic to
00:20:20steal the
00:20:21hearts of young handsome men and she eats them alive oh i'm gonna kill that bitch before she takes
00:20:26my son james get the swat team yes sir
00:20:34you regain consciousness
00:20:45help me i just want
00:20:52something's wrong
00:20:56you were drunk with an aphrodisiac
00:20:59lysander armstrong and his fortune will soon be mine
00:21:04that's one more thing i'm saving you from
00:21:13sir the swat team is here captain morales
00:21:18my son is trapped behind there with a devious man-eating witch i need you to do whatever
00:21:25you can to tear down that door rest assured general armstrong we'll break down that door
00:21:30and bury that bitch alive
00:21:37right rewrites the wrong
00:21:42human
00:21:46who the fuck are you and why the hell are you niggity
00:21:51good you're awake i'm saving you
00:21:54saving me by bathing with me
00:21:58who are you a fucking spy
00:22:00talk i swear to god i'll have you arrested for this
00:22:05you're the one who's trying to kiss me in your stipper
00:22:10i will never
00:22:11oh really
00:22:25look who's guilty now
00:22:29look i don't know what the fuck this is all right but it is a biological fact
00:22:33a man is attracted to a naked woman and her breasts
00:22:38science okay just means that my body
00:22:41oh shut up
00:22:45you're distracted me with your phone
00:22:47and i'm a professional
00:22:49i hear lysander's voice captain do something now
00:22:52ready
00:22:53ready
00:22:58we're almost there
00:23:01aim
00:23:02get em boys
00:23:04get em
00:23:06fire
00:23:10fire
00:23:10fire
00:23:39those
00:23:41um master armstrong you are too easily fooled this homeless psycho doesn't even have the
00:23:47skills to make a living how is she going to save someone else's life that's right the queen angel
00:23:52and i are already the top female doctors in the world if we can't save him no one can except
00:23:58for
00:23:58the goddess healer think about it we heard lysander's voice he's been in a coma for two
00:24:03years miss trixie must have woken him up you're right this homeless girl is maybe
00:24:09the goddess maybe this homeless girl is really the god no no absolutely not there is no way this
00:24:19hobo girl is better than us but how could you know for sure right now what we need to do
00:24:24is not
00:24:24interrupt miss trixie you're wrong sir this homeless snake is using the forbidden techniques on master
00:24:31lysander it's called borderline revival she uses torturous pain to wake the patient but only
00:24:38temporarily it's a trick to pull the wool over your eyes and ears that means my son is in tremendous
00:24:45pain i'm gonna ask you two to do whatever you can to kill that antler rod bearing witch my son
00:24:52doesn't
00:24:53deserve this he is dying right now naked in a jacuzzi with a smelly vagrant then it looks like it's
00:25:00up to
00:25:00me the witch doctor only i know the right techniques to take her down my son's life is in your
00:25:08hands you
00:25:09heal him i will give you whatever your heart desires i don't know who you are but there is no
00:25:16way i am
00:25:17letting you rip my golden bachelor away from me this isn't the finishing touch i must now give you the
00:25:26kiss
00:25:26the kiss of life so we can both survive
00:25:47it's poison gas
00:25:50poison gas will smoke them out and end her torture over master lysander poison gas my son is in there
00:25:57you're jeopardizing his life as well no don't worry general gold diggers like her only care about
00:26:03themselves soon she'll come out crying to mommy then we can reverse the poison on your son and then
00:26:10he can marry one of us they really won't stop until they get both of us killed
00:26:18i made a promise to you that i'd save you it's now or never
00:26:35what the hell are they doing in there it's been over 10 minutes wait a second
00:26:40you don't think that they're you you suffocated my brother and miss trixie in there don't point
00:26:46your fingers at me if your brother's dead it's because of that homeless gold digger oh my god
00:26:51yeah she's the one who sealed the door shut i mean she probably locked themselves in there on
00:26:57accident miss trixie wouldn't have to do that if you weren't trying to sabotage her from saving my
00:27:02brother this is taking way too long captain morales it's time to get out the big guns
00:27:08these bazookas can flatten even a bomb shelter bazooka she won't be able to hide even if she's the
00:27:15devil himself crap oh my god get back suck ready aim oh shit
00:27:27quit your whining and stand down
00:27:42the parasite's been extracted shooter dead now do i need to fix your hearing too i said stand down
00:27:50don't listen to her she's a fraud a termite to the field of medicine i just saved this man that
00:27:56otherwise would have died in your care if i'm a termite then you're worse than a disease spreading
00:28:02tick wait a second are you saying you cured my son he'll wake in just a moment you can see
00:28:08for
00:28:08yourself well now you're just asking to be exposed that is it no more stalling general if you won't
00:28:16punish her i will
00:28:20don't hurt her
00:28:26he's secure
00:28:33his pulse is regular in fact it's never been better
00:28:40there's no sign of illness infection or disease
00:28:51miss trixie did it dad lysander's warm again he's not cold and pale like before
00:28:56and his heart is strong come feel it
00:29:01i saved my son thank you next time don't go seeking medical advice from those with ill will
00:29:07your son would have otherwise died by their greedy and unskilled hands
00:29:11i've learned my lesson i will not let these two nutjobs ever practice their voodoo voodoo magic again
00:29:18wait wait no no there is only one person in the world
00:29:22who is more skilled in the field of medicine than the queen angel and i
00:29:33could you really be the goddess of healing but rumor has it that the goddess of healing is well
00:29:39over 100 years old and you don't look a day after 20 it doesn't matter who i am what matters
00:29:46is that
00:29:46the patient is healthy again devon i've repaid your kindness by fulfilling your wish of saving your brother
00:29:51take care take care no wait miss trixie we still haven't fulfilled our promise to you yet
00:29:57he's right we are men of our words and as i promised you my heir lysander would take you as
00:30:03a wife if you cured him
00:30:04and you did just that of course you're welcome to marry me instead
00:30:09i really appreciate it but i'm sorry i i'm already engaged
00:30:19already engaged i am i've been patiently awaiting his return from deployment for the last three years
00:30:24and he's coming back today but don't be disappointed really i'm no one special
00:30:30i just got lucky with your brother some guru taught me that spa water can cure all kinds of ailments
00:30:36but you're still lysander's savior please let me give you what i promised take the gold
00:30:41no really i don't need anything i just believe in doing good in the world
00:30:51tricksy it's your fiance he's back and he says he's breaking up with you
00:30:58i must go
00:31:06hobo close halo glow
00:31:08i bet the goddess healer is just like miss trixie
00:31:11it was just dumb luck she's even dumber for not accepting his marriage proposal
00:31:16she could have been the richest woman in the world
00:31:19marrying the hottest most powerful bachelor around
00:31:25i'm gonna marry that homeless woman
00:31:31oh my god i mean i don't know about that homeless bimbo but this is godly
00:31:38no no no no my standard my standard was supposed to be mine
00:31:45i'd so much rather share him with you than let that penniless ugly bitch have him
00:31:50you two nut jobs are a disgrace to your profession
00:31:53take these two weirdos out of here and revoke their licenses
00:31:56wait no we're not brides no she's just better than us
00:32:02oh my god
00:32:05we were truly blessed to have miss trixie here huh
00:32:09she's no average jane no she isn't she said it was just dumb luck
00:32:13but if she truly had these special skills
00:32:16why did she wear that shit-stained dress and had an impeccable looking doll
00:32:19but think about the impenetrable walls
00:32:21no normal person could have done that
00:32:23goddess or not homeless or not i don't care
00:32:26i have never met a woman like that
00:32:28i have to find her i have to make her my life
00:32:31she won my heart over too
00:32:32but if my bestest big bro wants her
00:32:35i'll help you find her
00:32:36all right listen
00:32:38i need help finding three wedding gifts
00:32:45i'm dumping trixie so i want you your granddaughters filthy things out of my house
00:32:52now
00:32:53trixie paid for this house
00:32:54she waited for you for three years
00:32:58she was dumb enough to put my name on the lease
00:33:00and i'm upgrading for a better girlfriend now
00:33:02one with some serious fuck you money
00:33:05so get lost
00:33:06who gave you permission to bark like a rabbit hyena in my house
00:33:16grandma
00:33:18beatrice trixie amori
00:33:20i've been dying to throw this in your face
00:33:22i'm dumping you for your best friend
00:33:25marissa
00:33:27in fact
00:33:28the wedding's tomorrow
00:33:30so sign over the house
00:33:31now
00:33:37you gave me this ring and asked me to wait
00:33:40and i did
00:33:41for three years while you were deployed
00:33:43yet you cheat on me with my best friend
00:33:46and now you're trying to swindle my home
00:33:50do you have no shame
00:33:51we were together for three years
00:33:53and uh
00:33:53it was a complete waste of my life
00:33:55when i could have been with a loaded girl like marissa
00:34:03that's how much you would owe me if i was in the rent-to-boyfriend business
00:34:08i see you're fulfilling your highest aspirations of being a low-grade male prostitute
00:34:17oh yeah
00:34:18well marissa
00:34:21is so much better than you
00:34:22she grew up even poorer than you
00:34:26and now
00:34:26she's the ceo of an entire corporation
00:34:33and you
00:34:34and you
00:34:36you're still nothing
00:34:37so you think she's an upgrade
00:34:39of course she's an upgrade
00:34:41look what she uh got me for my engagement
00:34:45oops
00:34:46yeah
00:34:47that's maybe worth one millionth the presidential contract i gave her
00:34:57you gave her the presidential contract
00:34:59i certainly did
00:35:00in fact
00:35:02marissa
00:35:03you and your dimwit brother
00:35:05only have everything you have all thanks to me
00:35:12oh i think she's losing it bro
00:35:14that breakup must have hit her hard
00:35:17you two
00:35:18are the ungrateful cheating scum here
00:35:21my granddaughter
00:35:22supported you
00:35:24and your entire family for three years while you were gone
00:35:27how dare you insult her
00:35:31it's okay grandma
00:35:32let's not stoop to that level
00:35:35poor edna
00:35:36she still doesn't know what you're doing out there on the streets huh
00:35:39what is he talking about jersey
00:35:40show her bob
00:35:47this is how embarrassingly useless your granddaughter is
00:35:50she didn't purchase this house on her own
00:35:52she was begging on the street for money
00:35:56i can't be caught with a piss poor nobody like you
00:35:59even if you got no game
00:36:01i got street cred i got off keep
00:36:03you dig
00:36:03the word you're looking for is dignity
00:36:06and you're one to speak
00:36:08and you're one to speak
00:36:08cheater
00:36:10is this true tricksy
00:36:15i've been broadening my horizons grandma
00:36:17i want to see how regular everyday people live
00:36:20so that i can help them
00:36:22of course those without substance underneath would never understand that
00:36:27what is that supposed to mean
00:36:28it means the new girlfriend you think is an upgrade
00:36:32is actually a downgrade
00:36:37enough bullshitting already
00:36:38just sign the damn papers and we can each get on with our lives
00:36:54at your wedding i will
00:36:55what
00:36:57if you won't do good by me of breaking things off before two-timing me with my best friend
00:37:02why should i do good by you
00:37:04i'll give you my john hancock at your wedding
00:37:07as
00:37:08my charity
00:37:09to you
00:37:10fucking bitch
00:37:11you better keep your word
00:37:13oh that's rich
00:37:15after tomorrow you will never feel so rich ever again
00:37:17do remember that
00:37:25tricksy
00:37:27marissa's a millionaire now
00:37:28they'll destroy you if you show even so much as a hair at their wedding
00:37:33grandma
00:37:33i have to confess something to you
00:37:36i've secretly amassed a fortune worth trillions
00:37:39trillions
00:37:42that would make you the richest person on the planet
00:37:47it's because of the healing hands i inherited from aseplius
00:37:50the god of healing
00:37:52i've saved several world leaders with these hands
00:37:55that's how i was able to give marissa the presidential contract
00:37:59and become the goddess healer
00:38:01it makes me angrier hearing her name knowing how she betrayed you
00:38:05but please tricksy dear
00:38:07i know it was broken your heart
00:38:10but
00:38:11embellishing your worth and who you are
00:38:14it will only delay the healing process
00:38:17you don't have to believe me just yet
00:38:19after we lost mom and dad because we didn't have the money for their medical bills
00:38:24i vowed that i would do everything i can to serve those in need
00:38:29that's why i'm taking everything back from butch and i'm giving it back to charity
00:38:32you've always had an angel's heart
00:38:35i'm certain you will meet someone who will treat you right
00:38:39who actually deserves you
00:38:41you will see tomorrow grandma
00:38:45oh yeah
00:38:51you said tricksy's crushing your wedding
00:38:53she was bullying us too salsa
00:38:55she's probably trying to extort you now that she knows you're rich as fuck
00:39:00i hope when nobody steps on snake
00:39:02snake bites back hard
00:39:04so let her come and embarrass herself
00:39:08you mean
00:39:10we broadcast
00:39:12that video of you
00:39:16yes
00:39:16her cave woman's take the 19th century tin can
00:39:20she'll prop me up higher on my pedestal
00:39:22and the whole world sees her in her homeless mess
00:39:24against my presidential glow up
00:39:26let's turn this party into her funeral
00:39:35there he is
00:39:38welcome home brother
00:39:40welcome home general
00:39:44sir
00:39:44the homeless woman who saved you miss trixie
00:39:47this is the file of her ex butch tanner
00:39:49he served with your regiment in the marines
00:39:51you mean the butch tanner that can barely carry supplies
00:39:54well she's been providing for him and his entire family while he's been deployed overseas sir
00:39:58so she waited for him for years and then he betrayed her
00:40:01fucking coward
00:40:02according to intel she's planning to bring it down on them at their wedding
00:40:05and we should join her
00:40:07men
00:40:08i'm only alive today because of that virtuous woman
00:40:11and her incredible power
00:40:12that saved my life
00:40:13so she needs our support
00:40:14will you join me in protecting her
00:40:16yes sir
00:40:17we will learn our lives to protect her
00:40:19sir
00:40:20and let's roll
00:40:36welcome everyone to my wedding
00:40:38today is a very special day for me and butch
00:40:41not only are we getting married
00:40:42but in just one hour my company will be receiving the presidential contract
00:40:46allowing my biomedical company to go public
00:40:52congratulations on the contract once again mrs.
00:40:55wake him
00:40:56stowe butch is taking my last name
00:40:58oh and please don't be so uptight secretary cho
00:41:01you are the secretary of the entire u.s health department but this is a par-tay after all
00:41:07i see some of the most important people in the nation have also arrived to celebrate you
00:41:13the u.s president will also be arriving soon to give you the contract herself
00:41:19it's an honor
00:41:20and that's why sasa is the best wife a man could ever dream of
00:41:25we will make sure the crowd is entertained tonight let the wedding begin
00:41:32not so fast the party doesn't start until i say it does
00:41:58you two really are a match made in hell
00:42:00so i've come to save your guests from this oncoming train wreck
00:42:04i don't recognize it from any of our elite circles who is she
00:42:07uh this is our entertainment for tonight sir just watch
00:42:14shh
00:42:15trixie what are you doing here this isn't the homeless shelter you lost
00:42:18i bet she's here to bum a meal off us you know being this poor
00:42:24me but my meal have you forgotten that it was i who bankrolled you two for the last three years
00:42:29and what evidence do you have of that look at me then go look at yourself in the mirror
00:42:34i'm a millionaire ceo even the first woman president will be here any second now to congratulate me
00:42:40and you're nothing but a washed up sewer rat
00:42:44sasa she's like so obsessed with me she'll
00:42:48see everyone butch already cut ties with his ex but she's so
00:42:52shameless and desperate that she'd still show up to my wedding
00:42:56to suck up to me this is what poor sad girls do
00:43:00they beg for scraps from us the rich and glorious
00:43:04projecting much marissa you might feel all high and mighty now
00:43:08but don't bite the hand that feeds you especially when i'm the one who's giving you the contract
00:43:18you giving me the contract you have no skills no education no connection so how could you possibly
00:43:26have a pool to get the u.s fucking president to give me a billion dollar contract we both share
00:43:32humble beginnings marissa and i saw potential in you even trusted you as my best friend but i recognize
00:43:39now that greed has poisoned you don't be all sore now just because i stole your man
00:43:45this is what us rich girls do they steal from lame spinsters for fun damn right
00:43:52you were too embarrassing for me sasa tramples you any day
00:43:57i could say that now that i'm marrying the rich bravo self-admission of a gold digger quick
00:44:03somebody put that on a memoir sasa she's embarrassing me in front of everyone
00:44:07drinkers up don't listen to her everyone she's the gold digging blood sucking leech
00:44:12and i don't even have to lift a finger and you're already embarrassing yourself in front of everyone
00:44:16for me butch
00:44:18you may look and sound like a man but you're nothing but a pathetic coward
00:44:23okay enough you know what i always couldn't stand about you your moral posturing but guess what
00:44:29morals are just lies to make you and girls feel better about yourselves that's why no man will
00:44:34choose you over marissa trixie because i've got the material goods and you're just all empty talk
00:44:40i'm not here to request to be chosen because i'm the one who's doing the choosing see this
00:44:59oh my god is that the billion dollar contract for sasa
00:45:06the one that's supposed to make us all rich as fuck no absolutely not i i don't believe it
00:45:12you all sound so scared already don't worry this isn't that contract
00:45:17it's the lease to the modest home you try to swindle from me
00:45:23see everyone she's just trying to bluff us but you don't even have the guts to go all the way
00:45:28look at her following orders i asked her to sign over the lease and here she is like a good
00:45:33little uh
00:45:34peasant slave that house is where all her life savings
00:45:40you want to uh i don't know beg for a little treat while you're at it
00:45:54you must understand me i'm here to take back everything i've ever given you
00:45:59i'm giving it to charity
00:46:08bro she's gone cuckoo in the head she thinks that just because she rented a pretty little dress she
00:46:12can pretend to be a deep pocket investment baddie you wish you had that kind of money to just toss
00:46:17away trixie it's just a drop in the bucket for me i i know what this is you've gotten delusional
00:46:24and you think you're cinderella so you can just show up to a fancy party and some prince charming
00:46:28will scoop you into money forever well that's not happening security lock the doors this woman
00:46:34doesn't leave until we're through with her this is where your dreams will die bitch
00:46:45we found miss trixie lysander she's being cornered by her ex and his mistress at the wickham wedding
00:46:49right now butch tanner well he's gonna wish he died in battle after i'm done with him let's go
00:46:58you think a few toy guns scare me marissa i've saved plenty of people for much worse
00:47:05including your head of command butch general lysander armstrong you mean the legendary war hero
00:47:12he's been in a coma for years after he saved the nation from a terrorist attack you're an unskilled
00:47:18unemployed ugly leech so how could you possibly have this magical ability to heal someone like
00:47:24general lysander armstrong no one here's gonna believe you if you really cured the incurable
00:47:29general then sasa is the fucking virgin mary and she's not you're just asking to be humiliated
00:47:36trixie you show them butch
00:47:43see for yourselves everyone trixie's just a freeloading beggar
00:47:51she won't leave me and marissa alone because we're rich as now i'm a major in the marines
00:47:57sasa she has a billion dollar biomedical contract with the military approved by the first female
00:48:05president of the united states herself bitch how despicable she's just trying to leech off you like
00:48:11a parasitic gold digger get out of here no one wants to marry you no free meals for the poor
00:48:17do you see this trixie this is high society so you're either born on a silver spoon or you're
00:48:24as accomplished as me to be here maybe if you do some serious dick sucking here
00:48:29maybe someone will drop a couple bucks in your tin can
00:48:35i already have everything one can dream of but i valued our friendship marissa which is why i came
00:48:40here to give you a second chance to see if you'd apologize and admit to your backstabbing
00:48:45but no you stooped so low it disgusts me nothing is more disgusting than you standing on street
00:48:52corners like a bum and who knows if you've already started offering sexual services
00:48:59well then why don't you get on your knees for me trixie my brother will never take you back no
00:49:06man will
00:49:07marry an embarrassment like you but make me happy and i might consider making you my personal prostitute
00:49:25how dare you hit my brother i'm never letting you leave here alive
00:49:31awesome don't worry my dear after i'm done with you trixie not even the goddess of healing will be
00:49:37able to save you oh is that so security get down on your knees and give bob one hell of
00:49:48a blowjob
00:49:48in front of everybody here or i'll pop so many holes in you the men here won't know which one
00:49:53to
00:49:53fuck i don't need to be the goddess of anything to punish you any of the powerful leaders i've
00:49:59saved before could crush you before you even touch me dream on you wish general lysander scooped you
00:50:06off your feet but you weren't good enough for me you're definitely not good enough for him enough
00:50:11you're souring my party so you either get the fuck out or i'm gonna shoot you on the count of
00:50:19three
00:50:19i think i quite like it here two
00:50:34this wine is so delicious one shoot
00:50:40nobody is laying a hand on my future wife
00:50:50it's it's
00:51:00who the hell is this
00:51:06i'm sorry that i'm late did they hurt you no i'm fine but um when did i become your future
00:51:13wife
00:51:15you saved me trixie remember i'm a man of my word they're never gonna hurt you ever again really it
00:51:23was nothing i saved you because you're a good man not because i want you to owe me any favors
00:51:35i see what this is you're the one who cheated on me trixie look at you guys all lovey dog
00:51:40don't
00:51:41try to pin this on her she waited for you for three years this is the kind of woman of
00:51:45virtue that a man
00:51:45would die for you don't make me laugh she's probably out there giving blowjobs for cash no man who in
00:51:56a
00:51:56hundred foot pole would want to touch her she should be happy bob was willing to give her some
00:52:05i see her in the marines
00:52:08i'm a major you know look man i know trixie is like uh i don't know like a seven now
00:52:15that she's all
00:52:15cleaned up but don't waste your manhood on a whiny worthless woman like that
00:52:25a real man never talks about a woman that way you're a coward
00:52:40we don't need to fight fire with fire to deal with the likes of them
00:52:44you're very gracious trixie you know that
00:52:49you're only getting off with it because she's so kind so you're gonna do me the favor of never
00:52:52coming near her again you understand you want to with me a little dipshit i'm a major
00:52:58you're probably lowest rank of the military grunts i'll i'll destroy you do you really not know who
00:53:04this is butch i thought you were in the marines what have you been doing this whole time if you
00:53:08don't
00:53:09know who this war hero is he was just a supply boy war hero is this all part of your
00:53:18plan trixie
00:53:19poor girl did you sell your house to hire this actor so you can feel better about yourself a woman's
00:53:25worth is tied to the man she marries trixie is worthless because that guy looks like a cowboy
00:53:34a bum girl and a pimp what a pair seems like they don't know who you are since you've been
00:53:40out of
00:53:40action for so long maybe we should try to pay some off some more don't you think bring in the
00:53:46wedding gifts
00:53:55what is all this trixie listen i know that you didn't ask for anything after you saved my life
00:54:01but i know that we shared a moment
00:54:06i'm not the kind of man to get close to a woman and then just disappear it's not in my
00:54:10nature
00:54:12like somebody else here listen trixie i have never met a woman like you so incredible and kind
00:54:24and beautiful so i know that you're the one for me this guy's either nuts or a really really good
00:54:33after oscar worthy oscar worthy no first gift
00:54:43trixie i know that you just lost your home so i'm gifting you with your own new mansion worth 500
00:54:50million dollars previously owned by jennifer aniston second gift
00:54:59this contains all the rights to my entire fortune which is now yours entire fortune from a cowboy
00:55:06actor you must be that easy they already spent their entire life savings on this clown show they've
00:55:11got nothing left why sander i really don't care for any of us look i i know i know that
00:55:18you are the
00:55:18farthest thing from a material woman okay which is exactly why well my third gift is um
00:55:34wealth
00:55:41cleo hey oh my god you found my dog
00:55:51trixie i'm just a man but with you it's so much more trixie amore
00:56:00will you marry me
00:56:03you know i can't say no to this doggo
00:56:09yes i will marry you
00:56:27go go power couple whoo okay stop the only power couple here is butch and i
00:56:36let's remind everyone how worthless trixie is no man in their right mind would marry that
00:56:44embarrassing sack of scraps hey i don't care if she's homeless or not but i'm making this woman my
00:56:50wife which means that she will be treated as and cherished as the most precious woman on earth understand
00:57:00you still don't realize that my brother is the most powerful man on earth this is general
00:57:06lysander armstrong
00:57:15as if like the almighty general lysander armstrong would propose to a homeless prostitute like
00:57:22trixie yes the armstrong family basically control the global stock market lysander armstrong would
00:57:27sooner marry the princess of england than someone from the lowest rank of society i bet my life
00:57:33you're all just actors then you better enjoy your last breath come on lysander what are we waiting
00:57:38for let's show them what we can do and get revenge for trixie what can a bunch of piss poor
00:57:42people do to us the elites infect us with your poor people bad luck she wishes she could blame her
00:57:48low status on bad luck truth is she's just a useless lazy bitch and bum she's utterly unmarriable
00:57:58i can dispose of them in other means if you don't prefer violence i'd handle them myself but
00:58:06i'll let you do all the heavy lifting go ahead lysander
00:58:17yes hello this is lysander please bankrupt marissa wickham for me
00:58:22oh my gosh i'm so scared anyone these days could call anyone and pretend to be on the phone
00:58:34uh hello yes
00:58:39what
00:58:54hey hey hey are you sure that was the call saucer that that was a real call people don't just
00:59:00suddenly go bankrupt like that my company's dead evaporated poof it's a thin air
00:59:08that's impossible who are you what did you do secretary cho you said you're the secretary of
00:59:15health right and you yourself said that the armstrong family owns the entire global stock market
00:59:20could that be how they bankrupted miss wickham then that means
00:59:27you're really lysander armstrong the richest and most powerful man in the country
00:59:33tricks he's married the famed war hero the man every girl wants and every man wants to be
00:59:41now you believe me those who do bad will always end up losing everything
00:59:46there's got to be some some trick to this you guys are just bums trying to extort money from us
01:00:00i know why you're all over tricksy because you've been in the military for so long you don't know
01:00:04what a real woman can do for you let me take you to my wedding chamber and i'll show you
01:00:09a good time
01:00:12do you remember your hands for me or i'll have them removed for you
01:00:15i would never be interested in a woman who's as vile and cruel and wicked as you are guess the
01:00:27cheater gets cheated on eventually
01:00:31sasa was just trying to save the company i don't blame her at all your double standards are incredible
01:00:37okay you don't want me fine but there's plenty of other efficiency i can give you a room full of
01:00:43pageant winners uh 18 years old fresh for the taking
01:00:53i did that so you wouldn't have to miss tricksy thank you devon
01:00:59marissa not only have you backstabbed me your best friend by stealing my fiancee
01:01:06but now you'd sell at other innocent girls just to get your company back you're an insult to all
01:01:11good women out there no to all of humanity so now everything that i've ever given you to
01:01:17i'm taking it all back
01:01:21wait everyone stop
01:01:25they're imposters
01:01:30i just got off the phone with the president and she said your contract is not getting cancelled
01:01:34because it was assigned by the goddess healer herself so we won't go bankrupt the goddess healer
01:01:41you mean the eccentric and highly elusive sage in the field of medicine approved of my biomedical
01:01:46products yes that's the highest honor anyone can have in the field of health and medicine the goddess
01:01:52healer's motto is the right rewrites the wrong the left leave the wrong bereft that means she's
01:01:59rewarding me the president would never let your company go bankrupt in fact she's on her way now
01:02:07so you're telling me this dashingly handsome motherfucker over here isn't lysander armstrong
01:02:14who the cares who he is if the president and the goddess healer approves of my products who
01:02:19cares about this washed up war hero we can break his legs break his arms no one would even bat
01:02:24an eye
01:02:24she even gave us explicit permission to call upon secret services fbi fbi
01:02:31you're under arrest for fraudulent claims and identity theft gotcha
01:02:41guess i still get the last laugh tricksy no don't arrest her tricksy is a good person please officer
01:02:49don't arrest her grandma mr rogers mrs williams what are you all doing here the neighbors heard
01:02:55about the breakup between you and butch we were worried so we came here to back you up listen officer
01:03:01i can attest that tricksy amoria it's a good neighbor she's very kind-hearted and would never
01:03:07break the law yes and one time when my daughter needed university tuition tricksy gave her everything
01:03:13she had just to help her out she also paid for my recent heart surgery as well my fiance really
01:03:19is
01:03:20an incredible woman she's an angel descended from heaven you must be the criminal pretending to be
01:03:30general lysander armstrong my brother is not a criminal he's a war hero who single-handedly saved
01:03:36this country from a terrorist attack without him this whole country would have been bombed to ash and
01:03:42that's why it's twice the crime is stealing his identity general lysander armstrong only fell into
01:03:47a coma because of the fight with the terrorist and we've received no word that he's woken up yet so
01:03:51this must be an imposter i can tell that this whole dilemma with my identity is causing you a lot
01:03:57of trouble i promise that i'll get it resolved and we can focus on taking down your scumbag ex
01:04:04if you want to arrest me fine but don't fuck with my fiance you don't get to decide punk let's
01:04:11go
01:04:34get him if you can
01:04:42uh
01:04:58uh
01:04:59uh
01:05:27Is that enough pain, or do you want more?
01:05:37Legend is written all over you, Leicenander.
01:05:43Grandma, meet my new fiancé.
01:05:48Wow, your new fiancé?
01:05:50He's so manly.
01:05:52Much better than your last one.
01:05:54I always knew you'd find someone better.
01:05:57It's Butch's loss.
01:05:58Trixie has always been so much better than Marissa.
01:06:02She's like a shining star in the sky, and Marissa's like a roach in the sewers.
01:06:07Bitch, we name calling now?
01:06:09I'll drown you out with insults from my side, right fam?
01:06:12Drown out the poor!
01:06:13Drown out the poor!
01:06:15Drown out the poor!
01:06:16Drown out the poor!
01:06:18Drown out the poor!
01:06:19Drown out the poor!
01:06:19Drown out the poor!
01:06:22Drown out the poor!
01:06:24You can't compete against me, even if you have one guy on your side who can fight.
01:06:28We're too honorable to fight dirty like you.
01:06:30So you're using defenseless lives as your shield, because you know we won't hurt them.
01:06:35Let them eat cake!
01:06:37Hmm.
01:06:46You can't shoot all of them.
01:06:48Grab what you can, fam.
01:06:49Attack!
01:07:07You will not hurt a single soul in my presence.
01:07:15What the fuck was that?
01:07:17I don't care what the fuck it was!
01:07:19I'm not letting her make a fool of me at my own wedding!
01:07:28Damn it!
01:07:29Damn it!
01:07:30Damn it!
01:07:32You forgot I had a gun too?
01:07:35That'll cheat you for messing with the wig hams.
01:07:36Take Miss Trixie and her family and get out of here.
01:07:39We're cornered.
01:07:40I'll sacrifice myself to fend them off.
01:07:42Devon, you and your brother are both good men.
01:07:45I will not let your injury be in vain.
01:07:48They will be punished.
01:07:52Now hold still for me.
01:07:56Right.
01:07:57Ray rides the world.
01:08:08Holy fuck!
01:08:10Did she just reverse the bullet?
01:08:11By chanting the goddess healer's chant?
01:08:13Is she the goddess healer?
01:08:19I'm all better now.
01:08:20Thank you, Miss Trixie.
01:08:22See, I knew that you were no ordinary woman.
01:08:25No.
01:08:26Please.
01:08:27I am just an ordinary girl.
01:08:29Don't put me on some sort of pedestal.
01:08:30Sure.
01:08:32You hear that?
01:08:33She's just some average homeless girl in the streets.
01:08:36She was probably holding out a super magnet that drew out the bullet.
01:08:39While I do not care for glory, I do believe in justice.
01:08:43Marissa and Butch, not only have you betrayed me, but now you've hurt the innocent too.
01:08:48I will make you both pay for your crimes.
01:08:51And who are you to judge me for what I do?
01:08:53God?
01:08:55Wrong.
01:08:56But you're close.
01:08:58Bullshit!
01:08:59I'm gonna show you how the elite can trail board you little lives.
01:09:04You wanna cross the line so bad?
01:09:06Then let's see you try.
01:09:07Charge!
01:09:17The hell is this?
01:09:19This is the line between life and death.
01:09:23Yo, was that extra neon spray paint?
01:09:26I'll admit it looks pretty good, but I'll die before I believe that's magic.
01:09:31You're not the Grim Reaper.
01:09:33What if it's a trap?
01:09:34That woman has many tricks up her sleeves.
01:09:36We ain't afraid of her.
01:09:37She's nothing but a circus prostitute.
01:09:40Why don't you cross the line and see for yourself?
01:09:43I will.
01:09:47Left leaves the wrong rest.
01:09:56I'm fine.
01:09:57Nothing happened.
01:09:58You'll see soon enough.
01:10:00Oh, please.
01:10:01I really wanna die.
01:10:03And you call this the line between life and death?
01:10:05I knew you were just making that shit up.
01:10:07Whoops!
01:10:08Just frosted again.
01:10:10Whoops!
01:10:11And again.
01:10:12Nothing's happen-
01:10:13Stop!
01:10:15Stop!
01:10:16Stop!
01:10:17Stop!
01:10:19Stop!
01:10:20Stop!
01:10:24No!
01:10:25No!
01:10:26Hey!
01:10:27What did you do to my brother?
01:10:29I didn't do anything.
01:10:31Your brother just didn't want to heed my warning.
01:10:34I suggest you take him to the U.R.
01:10:36If you don't want your wedding to become his funeral.
01:10:39Come on.
01:10:41Major.
01:10:42Are you not gonna help your own brother?
01:10:43How was he able to cross the line?
01:10:45See, this must be an illusion!
01:10:50Only the pure of heart can cross the line.
01:10:53Will somebody take my brother to the hospital, please!
01:11:02You're so sore I wouldn't marry you if you'd go and hurt my brother.
01:11:05Oh, please.
01:11:06You hurt us first.
01:11:08At first, I was really hurt by your betrayal.
01:11:11But I've come to realize your true colors are that of a snake and a coward.
01:11:16Marissa, thanks for taking this low life from me.
01:11:20You blame yourself for being worthless.
01:11:23You think anyone would want to marry you when you've got nothing to offer?
01:11:28When you wear odd and crazy clothes all day?
01:11:34Don't touch my wife.
01:11:38And instead, Trixie gets a handsome and protective husband.
01:11:43You can daydream all you want now, Trixie, but when the presidential contract arrives,
01:11:47it'll hit you like a fucking truck.
01:11:49That you're nothing but an ugly phony, and I'm the queen of everything.
01:11:52Oh, really?
01:11:54Then let me show you how it is I who has everything you want.
01:11:58You've got nothing on me.
01:12:02Yes.
01:12:03Tell the president to get here immediately.
01:12:10Goddess!
01:12:11Madam President, I require your assistance.
01:12:14Yes.
01:12:15We'll be there immediately.
01:12:19Get the VP.
01:12:20We're leaving now.
01:12:24Did she just pretend to call the first woman president of the United States?
01:12:28God, I knew you were cheap, but I didn't know you were crazy, too.
01:12:31I'm so glad I dumped you for Marissa.
01:12:34You're pathetic, Trixie.
01:12:36A secretary to remind everyone how I have the presidential contract coming?
01:12:39Miss Wickham is correct.
01:12:41I was on the phone with the president earlier.
01:12:43Only the most important people have Madam President's direct line.
01:12:47You hear that, everyone?
01:12:48There is no way low-life Trixie could have called the president by herself.
01:12:54She's just a desperate phony who doesn't get enough male attention,
01:12:58so she's come here to play up her importance.
01:13:00No.
01:13:01My granddaughter would never do that.
01:13:03Reversing time just to heal someone's wound, only the goddess healer can do that.
01:13:08Is Trixie really the goddess healer?
01:13:16Oh, first, your boy toy actor pretends to be the war hero General Lysander Armstrong,
01:13:23and now you, Trixie, are pretending to be the goddess healer who gave me my presidential contract?
01:13:28Is this how the working class think all the time?
01:13:31I never realized how delusional they were.
01:13:34You can only dream of what you can never have while we rub our riches and privilege in their faces.
01:13:40Look, I don't know what circus school you went to, but you trying to make me jealous, Trixie?
01:13:45It ain't working.
01:13:46You can't just fake the...
01:13:50Yeah, but goddess healing power is legendary.
01:13:53It's like real magic.
01:13:55Trixie, you're an angel, but the goddess healing is beyond your imagination.
01:14:00And if we steal her identity just to punish her ex, won't her followers be furious and riot against you?
01:14:08No.
01:14:09Trixie, look, I believe you.
01:14:12You saved me.
01:14:14Whether you're a goddess or not, you did that.
01:14:17No matter what happens, you are a goddess to me.
01:14:21We'll riot against you now.
01:14:23Tear her apart!
01:14:24Tear her apart!
01:14:26Tear her apart!
01:14:27Tear her apart!
01:14:29Tear her apart!
01:14:30Tear her apart!
01:14:31Tear her apart!
01:14:31The Vice President arrives!
01:14:48Who dare cause ruckus in here?
01:14:53You're General Lysander Armstrong.
01:14:56Wait!
01:14:57What?
01:14:58He's actually General Lysander Armstrong?
01:15:01No, we've been through you.
01:15:02through this already once, okay? Right, Secretary Cho? This actor Trixie Hired pulled this weird
01:15:09stunt to try to bankrupt me, but you already confirmed with Madame President that I got
01:15:14the contract coming still, right? Yes, we all thought he was a fraud. What I mean is,
01:15:21you're the war hero, General Lysander Armstrong, and how dare you crash Miss Wickham's wedding?
01:15:27The moment you wake up, you fall under this vixen spell, and now you're attacking one of
01:15:32the most important allies to the president. He is the general, but he's in trouble now.
01:15:39Did you hear that? Even the vice president knows me as an important ally to the nation's leader.
01:15:45So what if Trixie picked up some washed-up war hero? We got the VP and the president. On our
01:15:51side,
01:15:52you'll always be nothing, Trixie. I told you. Now punish them, Vice President Langley. This is treason.
01:15:59Lysander Armstrong, you are stripped from your military honors and titles.
01:16:08Hurry! The goddess healer needs us.
01:16:13You can't do that, Mr. Vice President. My brother is a war hero. He single-handedly saved this country
01:16:19from terrorist attack. He was in a coma for two years. If it wasn't for Miss Trixie, he would...
01:16:23Enough! You speak another word, and I will bring down your entire family. Not just your brother.
01:16:30Devin. It's okay.
01:16:33Mr. Vice President, I've already given my life once for my country.
01:16:36I have no problem doing that again if it means protecting my fiancé's life.
01:16:41And let's be honest about one other thing, Mr. Vice President.
01:16:43I never gave a fuck about any damn titles.
01:16:49I truly saved a good man.
01:16:56I will not let you bring ruin to my fiancé.
01:16:59And what can you do about it?
01:17:01Oh, Mr. Vice President, I have a swell idea.
01:17:04My biomedical company invented the latest line of poison darts for the military.
01:17:08Let's try it out on them.
01:17:12Hold on, Mr. Vice President.
01:17:13There's no way that you're taking this seriously.
01:17:15Put innocent civilian lives in danger?
01:17:18Despicable!
01:17:18What's more despicable is that you and your filthy companions are disrespecting power.
01:17:24Miss Wickham, you can use full force on them.
01:17:28Did you hear that, boys?
01:17:33Oh!
01:17:42Shoot!
01:17:43Wait, that's the President.
01:17:55What the hell?
01:17:57Hey, idiots!
01:18:05Oh, my gosh.
01:18:07I'm so sorry, Madam President.
01:18:09That was...
01:18:10They were totally aiming for Trixie, the fraud in the middle.
01:18:14What is this?
01:18:15Oh, that's my new biomedical weapon, Madam, for your military.
01:18:19This is a war crime.
01:18:21These are innocent civilian lives you're messing with.
01:18:23You're the uncivilized buffoon.
01:18:25I can shoot whoever I want.
01:18:26I have the presidential contract.
01:18:28With great power comes great responsibility.
01:18:30And this is the kind of dastardly creation you've made with the contract I gave you?
01:18:35What are you doing?
01:18:35Reverse the poison and take it out of the present before it's too late!
01:18:39That is easy.
01:18:40There's no need.
01:18:42I'll save everyone.
01:18:56It's raining gold!
01:19:01What's happening?
01:19:02Trixie doesn't have that kind of money.
01:19:04It's got to be cheap glitter.
01:19:07She...
01:19:08She is...
01:19:10She is a criminal.
01:19:12Don't worry, Madam President.
01:19:13We will arrest her and we'll throw her in prison.
01:19:15I'd be quiet if I were you.
01:19:17Because you're the one that would be going to prison once everyone is healed up.
01:19:20What are you talking about?
01:19:21The President literally came here to give me my billion dollar contract.
01:19:34This contract?
01:19:36Yeah!
01:19:37Yes!
01:19:38Thank you, first gentleman.
01:19:57My contract, you bitch!
01:19:59And that's not all.
01:20:12This foul weapon will not see the light of day.
01:20:15There is only a need for a vaccine if there is a virus.
01:20:18Don't you realize?
01:20:19Or are you too much of a goody two-shoes to understand that?
01:20:23You're the real virus here, Marissa.
01:20:25Money is worth more to you than human lives.
01:20:28And that's something I cannot tolerate.
01:20:31So prepare yourself.
01:20:32Because I'm about to smite you.
01:20:35What are you going to do?
01:20:37The President is here and I just invented the best biomedical products in the world.
01:20:43You'll pardon me for that little mishap, right?
01:20:47Madam President, you've recovered now.
01:20:50So what's your final decision?
01:20:54I'll...
01:20:54She's going to give me my billion dollar...
01:21:02I'll smack her until she sees 50 stars.
01:21:05Ah!
01:21:08Ah, why are you attacking me, Madam President?
01:21:11You're supposed to be giving me the billion dollar contract.
01:21:14You wish, you idiot!
01:21:18I've never seen a woman so vile, so ugly on the inside, it makes me want to vomit.
01:21:24I don't understand.
01:21:25I was just trying to punish these imposters for posing as the Goddess of Healing.
01:21:29Ah!
01:21:30And do you know the Goddess Healer saved me and my son during childbirth?
01:21:36You've really seen the Goddess Healer herself in the flesh?
01:21:40The one and only.
01:21:43And it's...
01:21:46Her.
01:21:57What?!
01:21:59What?!
01:22:01What?!
01:22:08What?!
01:22:15You really are the goddess of healing, aren't you?
01:22:18How else did you think I saved you?
01:22:21Then why did you keep it a secret for so long?
01:22:25I wanted to walk the earth as a normal person.
01:22:28To help those in need.
01:22:30And make sure the man I chose loved me for me.
01:22:33No, so that means the billion dollar contract, it was you who gave it to me?
01:22:39She took it away just like that.
01:22:42That was her golden ticket.
01:22:44You were once my fiancé and best friend.
01:22:47But after everything you've done, we're officially getting ties with you both.
01:22:51No, please, I swear. I didn't know you were an actual saint.
01:22:57It doesn't matter who she is. Trixie has a heart of gold.
01:23:00She's an amazing person.
01:23:02And you ruin that the moment that you betrayed her.
01:23:06She's gonna be my wife.
01:23:07Because she is the most beautiful and amazing woman on this planet.
01:23:16I love you.
01:23:30All her gold. All her clothes. All that could have been mine.
01:23:35This is all your fault. This is all-
01:23:38She seduced me!
01:23:39Don't help me!
01:23:40You were the one that came onto me, you himbo!
01:23:43Please, Trixie, give me another chance!
01:23:47I want to be rich again!
01:23:49I'll be your slave.
01:23:51I'll kiss the ground you walk on!
01:23:53You've had your chance to apologize, but it's too late now.
01:23:56All I see is your greed and how much you'd hurt others just to benefit yourself.
01:24:02You two should be locked up.
01:24:03And she shall!
01:24:05For creating illegal weapons of mass destruction, arrest Marissa and Butch Wickham!
01:24:11It's all your fault, Marissa. I never loved you!
01:24:14It's your fault!
01:24:15I was only with you for your money!
01:24:17I didn't care!
01:24:18You were rich!
01:24:20I'll see myself now!
01:24:22Rest assured, goddess. We will not be using these biomedical weapons.
01:24:27My platform is spreading kindness, just like you.
01:24:31I knew you'd uphold our shared values. That is why I saved you.
01:24:35With these healing hands, I will work tirelessly to change the world one good deed at a time.
01:24:41Well, let's not let this wedding go to waste.
01:24:47Let's party!
01:24:48Wait, what if we just got married? Right now?
01:24:52Yes!
01:24:53Well...
01:24:54Woo!
01:24:56Do you take each other to be your lawfully wedded partner?
01:25:01I do.
01:25:02I do.
01:25:03You may kiss the bride.
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