- 18 hours ago
Category
🎥
Short filmTranscript
00:15Oh, fuck.
00:16Okay, time to go.
00:18What is this? It's 6 a.m. Oh my God, baby. It's too early.
00:21First of all, let me be very clear. I am not your baby.
00:25Second of all, get out of my house before I call security.
00:28Are you crazy?
00:29No.
00:30Just very busy.
00:32You are seriously kicking me out after all the fun we had last night.
00:37Last night was fun for you. For me, not so much.
00:41Time to go.
00:42Rapido, rapido. Let's keep going. Keep it going.
00:46Hey, listen.
00:47Don't you know who my father is? You couldn't have had it all.
00:50I'll be treating you like a queen by now.
00:52That is quite the offer for a one-night stand.
00:54You listen to me. No man in their right mind would ever, but not ever, marry you.
00:59Do you understand? You are going to die alone, you heartless fucking cow.
01:04Well, lucky for me, I would rather die than get married.
01:07To you or to anyone. Goodbye.
01:12My shoes are still there.
01:15Fuck.
01:19You're so naughty.
01:21Oh, listen, I gotta go after that.
01:22I love you too.
01:24Well, you look happy this morning, Brian.
01:27Did your boss die or something?
01:28I don't think Satan can die.
01:31But it's promotion day, baby.
01:33I don't know how you do it.
01:35Honestly, you just have to know how to handle a filly like her.
01:38Jenna's tough.
01:39I'd rather work for Jenna than anyone else at the company.
01:41Even when she is being a co-
01:46A new script came in.
01:47I need you to redo the whole thing.
01:50Right.
01:51Big wigs are waiting for you in the conference room.
01:53This is it.
01:55I've worked my ass out for this.
01:57And what a fine job you've done.
02:02I know that shit, Aiding Grin.
02:04What do you want?
02:05It's promotion day.
02:06For you and me.
02:08I'm just dreaming of my new window office.
02:10Ooh, out of the question.
02:11What?
02:12Oh, no, no, no, no, no.
02:13I have done everything you've asked for three years.
02:16You made a deal with me when I took this job.
02:18I stayed with you and put it with all of your-
02:20Look, Brian.
02:21I am the boss.
02:22You are the glorified secretary.
02:25I decide who gets what around here.
02:28You jump when I say jump.
02:29You bow down when I say so.
02:32Got it?
02:33Yeah.
02:34So, on your knees.
02:47That's a good boy.
02:54Don't say shit.
02:57Hi.
02:58Huh.
03:01Jenna, we've had our eye on you.
03:03And we'd like you to be the next CEO.
03:07However, there is one little snag.
03:11For you to be our CEO, you're gonna have to be married.
03:15Huh?
03:16That cold-hearted bitch.
03:18No promotion, huh?
03:20That's it.
03:20I'm gonna quit.
03:21I'm gonna go in there and tell it right to her sadistic fucking face.
03:27I'm sorry.
03:28You're saying my options are I get married in a week or I forfeit the CEO position?
03:36Where is this coming from?
03:37Sure, Hoeders.
03:41You know my son, Devin.
03:43He's our newest board member, as of this morning.
03:46We know it sounds a little backward.
03:49Shareholders expect traditional family values.
03:53As a single woman, you're just too intimidating for these guys.
03:58Jenna, we need to talk.
04:01All right?
04:03I can't hold an enemy longer.
04:04Me neither.
04:05Surprise!
04:07We're engaged.
04:25We're engaged to Brian.
04:30Seriously?
04:32It's been three years.
04:34Arnhem.
04:35Brian Arnhem.
04:35My assistant and the love of long life.
04:39Oh, right.
04:41Is this true?
04:44Of course it is.
04:47Jenna King is my kind, sweet, loving Beyoncé.
04:52Beyoncé.
04:59Damn.
05:00What did you say to her?
05:02It's all settled then.
05:04We'll get the paperwork made up immediately.
05:07Next week after the wedding, we'll make it official.
05:10Of course.
05:11Engaged means we'll be getting married next week.
05:16It's different when you say, like, it's different when you say, like...
05:19Congratulations.
05:21Congratulations.
05:22See you at the wedding.
05:26You're going down, King.
05:27Not if things went the way they did last night.
05:39What the fuck?
05:41I know.
05:42What the fuck?
05:43I know.
05:45Look, they weren't going to give me the position unless I said that I was married.
05:50I panicked.
05:51Oh.
05:51Well, you can keep panicking.
05:53Because we're not getting married.
05:55I came in here to tell you that I quit.
05:58What?
05:58And that you're a selfish asshole.
06:04Okay, that sounded a lot more harsh out loud.
06:06What are you going to do about it, huh?
06:09Fire me?
06:10You are selfish, Jenna.
06:12Yeah, but so are you, Brian.
06:14Oh?
06:15What do you want?
06:18I want a raise.
06:20Fine.
06:20No, no, no, I want a promotion, then the raise.
06:23This is not a fucking magic lamp, Brian.
06:25Oh, well, then I'll just tell them you lied.
06:26Oh, Devin!
06:27No, no, no, no, no, no, okay, fine, fine.
06:28You can have a raise.
06:30And your promotion.
06:32And your promotion.
06:33Yeah.
06:35I didn't know you were so annoying.
06:38Oh, well, I certainly knew you were.
06:42You're engaged?
06:43Huh?
06:44How could you?
06:47Oh.
06:49What are you doing?
06:50Penny.
06:56How?
06:57How?
06:57Um.
06:59It's not like you would tell your ex-girlfriend that you're even seeing someone?
07:03What?
07:04Betrayal!
07:05Tasha, come on.
07:07We went out for one drink.
07:09And then we slept together for months.
07:13Don't.
07:15Oh, don't touch me.
07:17As an inter-office relationship, you both are subjected for an HR interview.
07:22Answers to this interview are considered on the record and result in considerable fines
07:28if found to falsely represent the relationship.
07:31Okay, that doesn't sound legal.
07:33I don't make the rules, Mr. Arnhem.
07:35But I do.
07:38Isn't that funny?
07:41As you know, it's a very powerful company, which means that if we ever find out that
07:47this engagement of yours is a sham, not only will you lose the CEO position, but we will
07:53ruin you.
07:55Legal or not.
07:59Question number one.
08:01When was the first time you two were intimate?
08:07Oh, you owe me a big time.
08:11It was, uh, after the Poulsen style party.
08:15Yeah.
08:16Ms. King, uh, Jenna invited me as her plus one.
08:22Clark, honey, you said you would do it.
08:25I don't want to.
08:26Hey, stop.
08:37And, uh, we shared a very, very special night.
08:42What?
08:44Please just stop.
08:47No, I'm not.
08:48Come on.
08:49I'm not.
08:50Okay.
08:51Come on, show me.
08:51What do you got?
08:52Best move.
08:53Step touch.
08:55Okay.
08:59Come on.
09:00I don't know, man.
09:04I'm going to kiss you.
09:11Such a gentleman.
09:14Time to go.
09:22Thanks, bud.
09:24Let's go.
09:25Let's go.
09:28Yep.
09:30That was the first time we were intimate.
09:33Charmy.
09:34Moving on.
09:35What is Jenna's favorite underwear?
09:39This is ridiculous.
09:40Stand-up procedure.
09:42Yeah.
09:43But if you don't want to go through it, I'm more than happy to tell the board that you are
09:46receiving the offer of CEO.
09:50Black lace.
09:52From agent lace.
09:54Collab with lovely design.
09:55Is it also standard procedure to have her strip right here to prove it?
10:00This is so funny.
10:01He's so funny.
10:04Favorite movie?
10:05Speed 2.
10:07Favorite flower?
10:08Peonies.
10:09Especially when they're not in season.
10:15Well, you two seem to know a lot about each other, right?
10:18But Brian, did you happen to know that your fiancee here, she was cheating on you last night?
10:25With me.
10:30Yeah, well, we had a sort of last hurrah moment.
10:36And honestly, I'm just surprised that she spent her last hurrah slumming it with you.
10:43You two better watch her back because I'm coming for you.
10:47And I'll expose you.
10:49And then I'll ruin you both.
10:53Good luck.
11:04That was brutal.
11:06I can't believe you slept with that guy.
11:09You're one to talk.
11:10Touché.
11:12He's right, though.
11:16If we're going to do this, we need to really commit.
11:20You need to move in.
11:21Tonight.
11:24Here.
11:25Take my card.
11:26I'll cover any moving expenses.
11:29Look, this isn't ideal for me either.
11:32Believe me.
11:33But we need to make it at least look like we're on a united front.
11:41By the way, how did you do that in all the answers to the questions?
11:44It's like you were living in my brain.
11:47Jenna.
11:48It's literally my job to know and anticipate everything about you.
11:52Well, it's creepy.
11:54Hey, just be glad they didn't ask anything about me.
11:57What is that supposed to mean?
11:59You know absolutely nothing about me.
12:02That is incredibly untrue.
12:04Where am I from?
12:05Uh, farm?
12:07Mm-hmm.
12:09Ville?
12:10Nice.
12:11How old am I?
12:12Hopefully over 18, am I right?
12:15I'm turning 30 on Sunday.
12:17Really?
12:1830?
12:18And you're still an assistant?
12:22My bad.
12:23Uh, I will take you out for a nice dinner.
12:28Sunday is the day that we're getting married.
12:30Right.
12:33Ranger?
12:35Oh, this is serious, Jenna.
12:39All right, it's probably fun for you fucking around with finance bros, but this could ruin
12:45us.
12:46And you might be fine, but I could lose everything.
12:49I'm out on a limb for you.
12:51I know.
12:52I know I'm asking a lot of you, but I swear I will make it up to you.
12:57Starting today.
13:03Get off my ass.
13:11That's right, mother fuck!
13:17No fucking way.
13:19Welcome home, sweetheart.
13:22What did you do?
13:23You told me I needed to move in, so I moved in.
13:26It's like a fucking manosphere threw up on my house.
13:31Our house.
13:33You know, I'm starting to agree with Devin.
13:35This place could use a bit more of a masculine touch, bro.
13:39Mm-mm.
13:40Oh, and here, these receipts are for you.
13:43Get your feet off of the designer chair.
13:46Were you raised in a barn?
13:48No.
13:49The farmhouse next to the barn.
13:57Two.
14:00God, I love that.
14:05Is this a fucking waterbed?
14:07You know, my landlord would never let me have it.
14:09Where is the $3,000 California king I had custom made?
14:13Hmm?
14:14Oh, right.
14:15Um, in the alley, being used by a wino as a toilet.
14:18Hey.
14:20Don't worry about it.
14:22Ah.
14:23Oh, come on.
14:24Now we can sleep all close and snuggly.
14:26Very cute.
14:27Now I can see that you're pleased with yourself, torturing me.
14:30Oh, I thought you'd like it.
14:31I don't let anyone sleep with me.
14:34Not even hookups.
14:35Hmm.
14:36This is supposed to be my space away from people.
14:40My sanctuary.
14:42Our sanctuary.
14:42Finish that word.
14:45I will smuggle you with a pillow.
14:52If this is going to work, there are going to be certain rules that we both need to agree to.
14:58A contract.
14:59Hmm.
15:00Got it?
15:01I'm keeping the bed.
15:03Keep the bed.
15:04I will sleep in the guest room.
15:09What does our engagement contract say about consummating the marriage?
15:13Don't.
15:14Take that as a no.
15:16Okay.
15:17Engagement contract.
15:18Here are the terms.
15:21Sleeping quarters will be separate.
15:26Next, add physical affection only when required.
15:29Like, in public.
15:32Nothing gratuitous.
15:34Gratuitous?
15:40You mean.
15:45Think this.
15:50Yeah.
15:51Try to control myself.
15:58Good.
16:00Nothing gratuitous.
16:02No dating or hooking up until the CEO paperwork is signed.
16:05And my promotion paperwork.
16:08Whatever.
16:09And...
16:10Full and total verbal commitment to each other.
16:12Blah, blah, blah.
16:13I get to pick the wedding DJ.
16:14No.
16:15No DJ.
16:16This is going to be a good old-fashioned courthouse shotgun wedding.
16:20Except I am not pregnant.
16:21Just when I thought you couldn't get any less fun.
16:23Where do I sign?
16:25We, Jenna King and Brian Arnhem, enter into this agreement of engagement willingly and of our own volition.
16:32What?
16:33Were you like a lawyer or something?
16:35Used to be.
16:36Okay.
16:39What?
16:39I practiced before I joined Purple Rabbit.
16:42Now.
16:44Sign there.
16:47Sign there.
16:47Sign there.
16:54Sign there.
16:56Sign there.
17:00All right?
17:07Hey, Jenna, it's alright.
17:09These are my parents.
17:11Mary and Cody.
17:12Your parents.
17:14Your parents?
17:16And you must be Jenna.
17:17It's so nice to meet you.
17:20Appreciate y'all having us.
17:22Right.
17:23Mom, Dad, what are y'all doing here?
17:27You said you couldn't make it home for your big birthday weekend because of work.
17:30So, surprise, we came to you.
17:33We went by your old place, but your roomie said you were here.
17:36And that you were getting married.
17:39Right, yeah, we almost forgot.
17:42We're engaged.
17:43You want to hear all about the engagement after we unpack.
17:47After you what?
17:49Right.
17:51Lovely.
17:52Are you guys sure you wouldn't be more comfortable in, like, a hotel or something?
17:57Jenna, they'll stay in the guest room.
17:59Family stays with family.
18:01And hey, you're family now, Jema.
18:04Jenna.
18:05Plus, we want to get to know the gal that stole Bright's heart so suddenly.
18:09Right.
18:09So, how long are you guys staying?
18:12We just wanted to stay for the big birthday weekend.
18:15But now that you two are engaged, we've got weeks of planning to do.
18:22Weeks.
18:24Weeks.
18:25Weeks.
18:25Really?
18:27We will be married and divorced by then.
18:29Why didn't you tell them that we're getting married next week?
18:32Come on.
18:33A courthouse wedding would devastate my mother.
18:35She's so excited about this.
18:36Just play along for a few days until I find a time to tell her.
18:40Fine.
18:41But remember when I said I don't like people invading my privacy?
18:44Well, yeah, I was going to ask you about that.
18:46Are you just afraid of people knowing the real you or is it more of a preservation thing?
18:49Stop guessing about my neuroses.
18:53I wouldn't have to guess if you'd just trust me.
18:59I do trust you.
19:02Obviously.
19:03No.
19:04You trust me with your schedule and your dry cleaning.
19:07Alright?
19:08I know almost everything about you.
19:11You know nothing about me.
19:17Am I wrong?
19:20I'll sleep on the floor.
19:21Uh-uh.
19:23I am just as stubborn as you.
19:25And twice the gentleman.
19:27You're on the bed.
19:44Hello?
19:45I can't wait.
19:46You're my appetizer.
19:48Buffet feast.
19:50You're my appetizer.
19:52Buffet freak.
19:54When I come out to the spot.
19:55Got me cooking on here.
19:57You're my appetizer.
19:59Buffet feast.
20:01Hey!
20:01Hey!
20:06Joining me?
20:12You know, for somebody who loves their privacy, you sure hate knocking.
20:16Could you just put some clothes on, please?
20:19This is incredibly inappropriate.
20:21What are you saying, boss?
20:23Oh, yes.
20:24Speaking of, do your parents know who I am?
20:26What do you mean?
20:28Do they know I'm your boss?
20:29Probably not.
20:31You know, usually I just refer to you by one of my pet names.
20:34What pet names?
20:37Satan.
20:39Satan's mistress.
20:40Devil incarnate.
20:42The dark princess of the underworld.
20:44Mainly just variations on the same theme.
20:46Unbelievable.
20:49Truly.
20:52I don't think this will fit.
20:55I don't think it's a good idea for me to play hooky from work right now.
20:58You know, important business things and assistant.
21:00You could be sick one day.
21:01That witch doesn't deserve you.
21:03Right, Jenna?
21:05I'm sure that witch could do a day without you.
21:09Could she?
21:10It's not like she has anything hugely important going on.
21:15Okay, we'll have fun.
21:17Aren't you coming?
21:17Didn't you say you were between jobs?
21:20I did say that.
21:22Mm-hmm.
21:23Good.
21:24So what do you have in mind?
21:27There's a lookout at the top of the mountain!
21:29Come on, slowpokes!
21:31Sightseeing is very different than hiking, Brian.
21:35Oh, God.
21:36Oh.
21:38I...
21:40Oh, God.
21:45I just...
21:46I just need to say...
21:48I just need to say...
21:49Oh, hey, hey, hey.
21:56Okay.
21:58So, more of an inside, girly.
22:00Noted.
22:01I run every morning.
22:03Right.
22:05Cut, like, on a treadmill, like a civilized person.
22:11This is my nightmare.
22:14What?
22:15Well, all of this.
22:17Strangers in my home.
22:18Hugging me.
22:20A wedding!
22:21A wedding!
22:22Oh, my God.
22:23The thought of a poofy white dress literally makes me want to puke.
22:32Well, if it's any consolation, I really do appreciate you being here.
22:36You know, it means so much to my parents to be here with me, and they are psyched about you.
22:43Family is everything.
22:45Family is overrated.
22:47Oh, speaking of, I did invite your parents to the wedding.
22:51What?
22:53Just kidding.
22:55Sort of.
22:57I know family's not really your thing, but I did make a few fake invitations and left them on my
23:01desk.
23:02And just to really sell it, I just went to Mr. and Mrs. King.
23:08Is this fun for you?
23:10Terrorizing me?
23:11Oh, immensely.
23:13What do you do for fun?
23:14Besides feast on the unborn?
23:16Um, close the red floor stories deal.
23:19Um, review development slates, sign paychecks, manage schedules, order coffee.
23:24Work, work, work.
23:25You know, there is such a thing as work-life balance, right?
23:29That is the funniest thing I have ever heard.
23:31Do you think I like being this way?
23:34I have been there since I graduated, and I still have to work twice as hard for them to take
23:38me seriously.
23:41You're right.
23:42What?
23:43It must suck.
23:46You are the most talented producer they have, by far.
23:50And it must suck to have to prove yourself time and time again.
23:53Oh God, especially when idiots like Devin just prance on in because they have a dick.
24:00Granted, I assume it's a pretty small, oddly shaped dick.
24:04Yeah.
24:04But you do deserve better.
24:14Okay, now on to the top.
24:17Buck up, buttercup.
24:26Ma, here, I know how much you love your chocolate chips.
24:28Oh, thank you, dear.
24:30I sure do love my chocolate chip cookies.
24:34Jenna, that salad looks delicious.
24:37Oh, yeah, it's a chopped salad.
24:40Are you kidding me?
24:41That's not just any chopped salad.
24:43That's the chopped salad.
24:44Extra chopped, no basil, no spices, just the way she likes it.
24:47Wow.
24:48You're going to make a great husband, Bri.
24:53Right.
24:54Yes.
24:55Thank you, babe.
24:57Right.
25:03Oh, you don't have to be shy in front of us, kids.
25:05You know, when your father proposed, he couldn't keep his hands off me.
25:09Still can't keep you.
25:10Oh, stop it.
25:12No, please.
25:12No, no, no, no.
25:13You won't horned off me.
25:15Please, no, no, no, no, no.
25:15So you're parents.
25:15Yeah, sorry.
25:18Hey, you know, the old ball and chain.
25:23I am not old.
25:25Oh, well, you certainly act a lot older than you are then.
25:30Yeah?
25:31Yeah.
25:31At least I don't act like a frat boy.
25:33Right.
25:34Right.
25:34Right.
25:35Right.
25:36Oh, my.
26:02Anybody want a drink?
26:03I know I do.
26:08Right.
26:11Pull yourself together, man.
26:13It's a contract.
26:14Strictly professional.
26:16Right.
26:18Hi.
26:19Do you have anything stronger than coffee?
26:24So, Jenna, tell us what you have planned.
26:28For what?
26:29Oh, boobies, probably.
26:33No, silly.
26:34The wedding.
26:35You are a hoot.
26:38Yeah, probably just something simple like a courthouse.
26:44Probably next week.
26:45Oh, a good old-fashioned shotgun courthouse wedding.
26:49Exactly.
26:50Except I'm not pregnant.
26:52No.
26:54No, you can't be getting married in some dusty old courthouse.
26:57Sweetie, last minute we can work with.
27:00But this is going to be your wedding day.
27:02It's fine.
27:03Don't worry, Jenna B.
27:04I will help you every step of the way.
27:07We'll start today.
27:09Ah, I'm actually...
27:10Oh.
27:11What did I miss?
27:13We are going wedding dress shopping.
27:16Oh.
27:18She loves dresses, especially wedding dresses.
27:21There's bourbon in here.
27:22Drink.
27:27Oh, isn't everything just so beautiful?
27:32Don't you just love, love?
27:34Uh-huh.
27:37Is something the matter?
27:42Maybe this is also complicated.
27:45Oh, sweetheart.
27:47I'm not going to lie to you.
27:48Marriage is complicated.
27:50If you follow your heart, you always end up in the right place.
27:54And I could see how good and big your heart is, Jenna.
27:58I don't know about that.
28:00It is.
28:01You've got to believe it.
28:05It's showtime.
28:07Woo-hoo.
28:09Woo-hoo.
28:10Hit me back.
28:11Never make it.
28:13Tell me something.
28:15You better not share.
28:17You're cutting out vicious.
28:20You're falling too deep.
28:21You're thinking laid back because.
28:23You promise to be in.
28:25So never give in to my natural emotions.
28:29Oh, keep in your head that you know the workbook to survive.
28:33Never give in to a natural emotions
28:37Baby, in your head, let you know that it just takes some time
28:44Just takes time
28:48Just takes time
29:01Yeah?
29:03I think you found the one
29:11Jenna, you feeling okay?
29:13You're looking a little pale
29:15Yeah, yeah
29:15It's probably just a hike and champagne and dancing
29:25I think I'm going to faint
29:27Jenna
29:27Oh, Jenna, Jenna
29:29You okay?
29:34Yeah
29:34Yeah, I'm good
29:36I'm good
29:36I'm good
29:37You look beautiful
29:40Oh no
29:46You should be fine
29:48Take her home
29:50Here
29:51Come on
29:52We'll get you some rest
29:57You know, you weren't kidding
29:58When you said wedding dresses really disagreed with you
30:01Not the time, Bri
30:02I don't even know what happened
30:04Oh, I talked to the doctor
30:07He said you just had too much fun
30:09A little bit of rest and you'll be right back on your feet
30:13Oh God, look on
30:16Here
30:20You can have my special blanket
30:23Yeah, there you go
30:26Some water over here if you need it to
30:28Your mom's really sweet, by the way
30:30Your whole family is
30:33I'll see where you get it
30:36Was that a compliment?
30:38Maybe we should take you to the ER
30:40Don't stop
30:41Don't make me laugh at my weekend's tape
30:44Sorry, sorry
30:48I don't think anyone's ever actually taken care of me before
30:51Really?
30:52But you make it so easy
30:58My parents never really cared about me like that
31:01It's like their careers and lives were so much more important than me
31:04Growing up, I was a parent
31:08And I think I just started
31:11Seeing and believing, really, that
31:14Showing vulnerability was a weakness
31:17Yeah
31:17Well, that sounds pretty hard
31:19Made me a good producer
31:21But a bad partner, I think
31:23You're not a bad anything, Jenna
31:26I mean, we're all humans
31:28Just
31:30Trying our best
31:33Except Devin
31:34Oh, yeah
31:35Except Devin, fuck that guy
31:36Fuck that guy
31:39Okay
31:43Fuck Devin
31:44Yeah, fuck Devin
31:45Bye-bye
31:48Bye-bye
31:49Bye-bye
31:54Bye-bye
32:22hi
32:23good morning
32:26I'm really glad you didn't turn into a pumpkin last night
32:29or whatever they have in hell
32:31right
32:33cause I'm the devil
32:40um
32:42thank you
32:45it was really sweet of you to take care of me
32:48what
32:50are you still sick
32:53do you have a fever or something
32:54I
32:57it feels really nice
33:09are you feeling okay
33:18I gotta go
33:20gotta go to work
33:28bye
33:35oh my god
33:36I love Brian
33:45wow
33:49I really have no friends to talk to
33:51maybe Brian was right about this whole work-life balance
33:55oh shit my meeting
33:57okay that is a problem for future Jenna
34:00just get it together babe
34:01and stop talking to yourself
34:03starting now
34:08okay
34:10so with the new script changes
34:12I wish Brian was here
34:16uh schedule changes
34:18I can't believe she slept with my husband
34:20did I just say husband?
34:23you seem a little distracted Jenna
34:26no
34:26not a good look for the next CEO
34:29no no
34:30everything
34:30everything is good
34:31everything is great
34:32let's just pick this up after the wedding
34:34you seem to have a lot on your mind right now
34:40yeah
34:43tick tock
34:44tick tock
34:45it all falls down
34:49it's two different nursery rhymes
34:51you moron
34:52did you just call me a moron?
35:00okay I'm just gonna
35:03tell him that I have real feelings
35:04and
35:05be over the thing straight
35:09Jenna
35:10I met your new neighbor
35:18Clark?
35:21long time no see Jenna
35:23oh
35:24you two know each other
35:26I'll start dinner so you can catch up
35:28Brian will be home soon
35:30who?
35:31uh
35:31Brian
35:32he's
35:34he'll be home soon
35:35so what are you doing here?
35:39funny enough
35:39just moved in
35:40down the street
35:42why
35:43you hate this neighborhood
35:44things change
35:46people change
35:48look I'm not the man who I once was
35:50okay
35:51I'm not the one who let you get away
35:58what we had
36:00that was special
36:01you can't deny that
36:02I
36:02I don't know what to say
36:04say it's not too late
36:06is it?
36:09right
36:14I'm engaged
36:15didn't answer my question
36:16you
36:16left me
36:18you broke my heart
36:19you don't know how sorry I am
36:21truly
36:21I wasn't ready then
36:23but
36:23I am now
36:24okay
36:25I'll prove it to you
36:27I don't have time for this
36:29do you love it?
36:30if you do just
36:32tell me
36:32I'll leave you alone for good
36:34oh you've got to be kidding me
36:39Clark would you like to join us for dinner?
36:42um
36:43no no
36:44sure
36:46hey
36:50come on
36:51dad if you don't mind
36:52oh
36:53sure
36:56here you go pal
36:58thanks for coming
37:00yeah
37:00appreciate it
37:01look at this
37:01all right
37:03let's
37:05oh
37:06nice
37:07comfy
37:08yeah
37:08that's about right
37:12Craig could you pass the wine?
37:18Brian could you pass the wine?
37:27hi
37:27I'll do it myself
37:30Clark said you two go way back
37:33yeah I knew Jen before all sass
37:35no frass
37:38I rather like strong independent Jenna
37:42sass and all
37:43well
37:44any Jenna's better than no Jenna
37:47right?
37:50uh
37:50Jenna
37:51any wedding progress today?
37:54oh no
37:55we're still
37:56planning
37:57I thought you hated
37:58planning weddings
37:59people change
38:01right?
38:24I know you and Clark
38:27they did
38:29but
38:31were you ever in love with him?
38:35we were engaged
38:47glad to see you're still running
38:49mind if I join?
38:55may I?
39:04there
39:10hey come on
39:15come on
39:16come on
39:17come on
39:17come on
39:17come on
39:18come on
39:18come on
39:18come on
39:26hey it was great
39:27catching up Jen
39:30What's up, Brian?
39:33What's up?
39:39Do you make breakfast?
39:42I did.
39:45That plate's for you.
39:47Although, I see you are gay.
39:49Got a little something left.
39:51He is harmless, Brian.
39:53Really.
39:55Brian, we're going to be late to meet my parents.
39:59You should put a shirt on.
40:10Oh, my God.
40:11It's so good.
40:12You like it?
40:12It's delicious.
40:15Very good.
40:20Here.
40:22Brian, I'll give Jim some of this.
40:25Here you go, sweetie.
40:30If it isn't the happiest couple ever.
40:37That's a spirit.
40:40Airplane, thank you.
40:41Hey.
40:42Oh, Dad.
40:44These are the board members of my company.
40:46The big day is almost here.
40:48Are you getting excited?
40:49Over the moon.
40:49I just have to figure out how to smuggle a wedding cake into a courthouse.
40:54No, you can't get married to the courthouse.
40:57Devin, call the staff.
41:00Tell them to prepare the house for a wedding this Sunday.
41:03No.
41:04Can we at least offer you some cake?
41:07Well, um.
41:08Oh, no, no.
41:08He's probably really busy.
41:10He's got very important.
41:11That's what meeting is going on.
41:12No.
41:13It's usually very.
41:15I need you to meet me at the cafe right now.
41:18Hey.
41:20How are you guys doing?
41:21Oh, my God.
41:22I'm coming right on in.
41:23Mm.
41:24Really good.
41:25You know what?
41:25I just realized we haven't heard the proposal story yet.
41:28It must be amazing, huh?
41:29So good.
41:30Please, tell us about it.
41:33It was actually a really funny story.
41:35Really?
41:35Um, Clark.
41:41Clark.
41:42Clark?
41:44I thought your name was Brian.
41:50Why don't you join us?
41:52We're just hearing about the proposal story.
41:54What if I do?
41:56Go on, Jenna.
42:01It was our anniversary.
42:04And, um, he wrote me a poem.
42:11It was so sweet.
42:13And masculine.
42:15And hot.
42:17And then he took me to a poetry reading.
42:20I didn't know you liked poetry, son.
42:22I don't.
42:23But apparently Jenna does.
42:25You know, Ode to a Fancy Urn is my favorite.
42:29Go on, babe.
42:30Why don't you tell the rest?
42:32Fine.
42:33I will.
42:35And then he cried.
42:37And he cried.
42:38And he cried.
42:39And then he got down on Whitney and he proposed.
42:41Yeah, well, that's not exactly how I remember it.
42:43Fine.
42:43Then you tell them.
42:49Pre-wedding jitters.
43:18What the hell are you doing?
43:20That is not fair.
43:21It is not my job to know things about you.
43:24You're right.
43:26But you never tried to either.
43:40I came to check on you.
43:42I'm fine.
43:44I'm fine.
43:44I couldn't sleep.
43:44I know you, Jen.
43:46You're not okay.
43:48It's just this whole wedding thing.
43:51And Brian drives me nuts.
43:54He does seem a little high-strung.
43:57Yeah.
43:58He's always, like, doing things for me.
44:00Not, like, in a patronizing way.
44:02In, like, supportive way.
44:05And he's ambitious and smart, which is annoying.
44:10And he listens to me, which is so weird.
44:14Jen, I can't stop thinking about you.
44:18Can I kiss you?
44:27I'm marrying Brian in two days.
44:29Look, I messed up.
44:30I can see that now.
44:31But if you have an ounce of feeling the way I feel about you,
44:35then you should be mine.
44:38I want to marry you.
44:39What?
44:42I thought you said marriage was a loss of independence.
44:45It's worth it to be with a person you love.
44:50Yeah.
44:52Yeah, you're right.
44:58Hey, think about it.
45:08Did you buy it?
45:09Every word.
45:11Sweet.
45:13Very sweet.
45:16Just play the part until she falls for you.
45:19And break it off with that loser, Brian.
45:21Then you're going to be free to leave her again.
45:23And I'll get you the rest of your money.
45:25You got it.
45:26I'm so glad you're again.
45:27Win-win for me.
45:28I get paid.
45:29I get some tail in the meantime.
45:31I kind of forgot how hot she is.
45:33I like you, Clark.
45:37Hey, hey, hey.
45:39You need to talk.
45:42I need your help.
45:44To teach someone a lesson.
45:48Like a team?
45:50You're a team.
46:00I thought you said you hated hiking.
46:03Well, like you said, people change.
46:06I'm glad you called this morning.
46:07Look, I like Bri.
46:09But no one makes me feel the way you do.
46:23God, I've missed you.
46:28Wait.
46:29Can we, baby?
46:31Here?
46:32Hey.
46:33I am all yours.
46:35Yeah.
46:35Do whatever you want.
46:36What about Brian?
46:37What about Brian?
46:39Brian.
46:45I don't have to take my shoes and socks off, right, babe?
46:47I mean, there's pokey stuff everywhere.
46:49That actually depends.
46:52On if you want to hike down fully nude or not.
46:57I think I'm going to puke.
46:59I think I'm going to puke.
47:01Oh, God.
47:02I know this was part of the plan, but watching that was truly sickening.
47:05Oh, well, at least you don't have his tongue in your mouth.
47:07Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa.
47:08What's going on?
47:10We need to talk.
47:11Look, there is nothing between me and Clark.
47:14There was at one time, but that is over.
47:18I am marrying you.
47:22Go to bed.
47:25Every time you come into my life, you fuck it up.
47:29You're the reason I didn't want to get married.
47:31You are a pathetic, impotent excuse for a man.
47:37Even if I hadn't seen this video of you and your little dirtbag boyfriend this morning,
47:42I knew you were up to something.
47:44So I strung you along until I could figure it all out.
47:48Thank you for coming to Jenny King's TED Talk.
47:50Kobe!
47:51Oh, no, no.
47:51Oh, come on.
47:55Thanks for doing this.
47:57Have a nice hike down.
47:59Douchebag.
48:00Brought me home.
48:01Bye.
48:08Oh, dear.
48:09You look beautiful.
48:12I want you to meet Grandma Sandra.
48:14She has something special for you.
48:17Grandma?
48:18Welcome to the family.
48:20Huh?
48:21We want you to have this.
48:23Oh, I really...
48:25Oh, yes.
48:27Absolutely.
48:28Yes, yes.
48:28We insist.
48:30It's an Arnhem family heirloom.
48:32And we want you to know, every time you look at it, that you belong.
48:38Farming.
48:39Farming.
48:40Fun.
48:41And family.
48:42Family.
48:57Hey, now.
48:59I told Jenna this already, but I got the whole CEO paperwork right here.
49:04Now, during the wedding ceremony, you're going to sign the marriage certificate, but you'll
49:09also sign this.
49:10Make it all official.
49:12Welcome to married life, son.
49:18That's your last chance, bro.
49:21I know it's all lies, lies, lies.
49:25I'm going to make a deal for both of us, so we can get what we want.
49:28If you owe Jenna, I'll promote you to her job, and I'll pay you three times the raise.
49:36But if you go up and sign that deal, I'm going to make good on my promise to ruin both
49:42of you.
49:42My offer stands for five more seconds.
49:46Five.
49:47Four.
49:49Three.
49:50Two.
49:51Oh, you know what?
49:53You're right.
49:54You are very consistent.
49:57Consistently the biggest D-bag I have ever seen.
50:02Enjoy having Jenna as your new CEO.
50:06Bye.
50:15That's all.
50:32That's all.
51:17It, uh, looks like our pan's gonna go off without a hitch.
51:22You sure about this?
51:27Stop the wedding!
51:32Oh, shit.
51:35Oh, my God.
51:41This marriage is a sham.
51:44As you can see in this contract right here, dated a week ago.
51:50I told you you shouldn't have given it.
51:51Not the time, Bri.
51:52They have deceived this company.
51:54And they have deceived all of you, ladies and gentlemen.
51:57Oh, my gosh.
52:00What's he talking about?
52:01I'm very glad you asked.
52:03In order to get promoted, Jenna, right here, forced her assistant, Brian, to marry her.
52:15Is this true, Jenna?
52:28You know, you would have made a really shitty lawyer.
52:32What?
52:33Look at the bottom of that page.
52:37I didn't sign that.
52:40You can wave that piece of paper around all you want.
52:44It's not gonna do anything for you.
52:46Because I made a promise to Jenna that I would marry her.
52:50That's exactly what I'm gonna do.
52:52You didn't sign the contract?
52:54Nope.
52:57So you did all of this because you're a good person.
53:06I'm sorry.
53:07I can't do this.
53:09Well.
53:12You have given me so much.
53:14What are you doing?
53:15You've given me years of your life.
53:17I threatened to ruin your career.
53:20I forced you to lie to everyone.
53:23I forced you to pretend to be in love with me.
53:26Look, you don't have to do this.
53:27You cannot stop.
53:28I'm sorry you ever met me.
53:33Wait.
53:37Just let me go.
53:39Trust me.
53:46I don't deserve this.
53:47No.
53:48I don't deserve to be a part of your family.
53:50You don't get to decide this.
54:05I guess she did all the dirty work to ruin both of you.
54:12That's why you'll never be CEO.
54:15What?
54:15Devin, you are an embarrassment to this company and to our family.
54:21If you insist on acting like a child, you are going to be treated as one.
54:26Go to your room and stay there.
54:29Please.
54:30Daddy, I can explain.
54:32Please.
54:43So how you doing, son?
54:45Pretty shitty, dad.
54:49I'm sorry I lied to y'all.
54:51You do what you have to do for true love.
54:54Including never giving up.
55:01Everyone can go home.
55:02It's over.
55:03She's gone.
55:07It's not over, Brian.
55:10Go find her.
55:12So what are you waiting for, son?
55:31Jenna.
55:33It's me.
55:35I know you're in there.
55:48Can I come in?
55:50I don't deserve this.
55:54Not after everything I've done.
55:58But you don't love me.
56:01This was all fake.
56:03I don't think you can fake the kind of connection we have.
56:06Do you?
56:08Why are you doing this?
56:10You don't need me.
56:12They offered you my position.
56:15Jenna, I quit.
56:17You what?
56:22Why?
56:23They, Devin offered you the position.
56:25That's your dream job.
56:27Why would you do that?
56:28I don't want to be anywhere you're not.
56:30Brian, I'm...
56:30Look, I know what you're going to say, okay?
56:33Because I know you better than anyone else.
56:38And I also know that I love you.
56:50And I have loved you from the day that I met you, Jenna King.
56:56And even when I've hated you, which I have many, many times,
57:03I've still always been head over heels in love with you.
57:07So, what do you say?
57:10No contracts, no professional strings attached.
57:22Will you marry me?
57:24For real?
57:27I love you, Brian.
57:29I love you, Brian.
57:42Brian, do you take Jenna to be your lawful wedded wife?
57:46So this is what you wanted?
57:48To get married tonight?
57:49I do.
57:52I don't want to spend another birthday without you.
57:55And Jenna?
57:57I do, too.
57:58You may now kiss your bride.
58:27Put the script in Cayman's hands.
58:29See if he likes it.
58:30Okay, oh.
58:31Hi.
58:33Oh, hey, could you get me a coffee?
58:34What happened to our new assistant?
58:35Amy's out there at the desk.
58:36Uh, Amy, could you grab us two lattes?
58:38Sure thing, boss.
58:40I'm the really tall guy.
58:42Yeah.
58:43Yeah.
58:44Yeah.