- 1 day ago
My Dad Is Poseidon
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Short filmTranscript
00:12Slow-ass sea slug! Your launch today, beach!
00:33Slow-ass sea slug!
01:00Filthy scavengers! When Lord Poseidon ruled the Deep, you Skyrats swore never to breach the surface.
01:10Poseidon? Fish food ages ago.
01:37Sire, Zeus' people just breached your outer barrier.
01:41I'm retired. Don't bring that crap to my door.
01:48Sire!
02:04Who the hell broke my new console? I'm gonna go deal with that bastard!
02:09Sire! You're finally stepping in!
02:25Go fight somewhere else. Don't block me from clearing my game.
02:28My king! Even Poseidon himself would still be fit to shine my boots!
02:54What did you do? Turn me back right now!
02:57What did you do? Turn me back right now!
03:02Sire! The entire Abyssal Realm awaits your command! Lead us against Olympus! We beg you!
03:08Zeus' brain's probably been eaten out by Chlamydia for years. I'm retired. I don't waste breath on crazy people.
03:21Screw power struggles. Rotting in bed playing games is the real way to live.
03:30Fight!
03:37Get your hands off me, creep!
03:39Sorry. I didn't mean to...
03:45Wait. Pointy ears. A dryage? What's a forest nintz doing here?
03:54He's just a regular human. A total nerd. Damn it. The Aphrodisians kicking in.
04:09You're burning up down here. Way harder than I pictured.
04:14I was drugged. This whole thing is Dylan's sick setup. If I don't mate someone before the timer runs out,
04:21I die. I really need this guy.
04:29Goddamn. You really know how to flip my switch.
04:40I need more. A lot more.
04:50Don't stop. Harder. Squeeze me tighter.
05:01What the hell did you do to me last night?
05:05Hey. I put in a lot of work. Don't tell me you forgot.
05:09What?
05:10Leora! I know you're in there! Nowhere left to run!
05:14Damn it. He tracked me.
05:29Leora. You're my fiancé. You belong with me. Come home.
05:33Get away, Dylan!
05:37As the leader of the Sacher, you actually drugged me.
05:44Why the fuck are you wearing some dude's shirt?
05:47You slept with someone?
05:50Who screwed up my plan?!
05:54Oh, so you're the genius who roofed her.
05:57Newsflash, tough guy. Real men don't need tricks.
06:00You talking to the boss like that, punk?!
06:08So you're the loser who ruined everything?
06:10You actually fucked this beach bomb shut in?!
06:20Touch him again and you'll regret it!
06:22Her body's tainted now, but her blood still has value. Can't push too hard yet.
06:28I won't kill him.
06:31But you're coming with me, Loria.
06:34Babe, if you don't want to go, I can handle this clown.
06:43Forget today ever happened. Go back to your life.
06:59Seriously? Can't I just play my game for once?
07:12Those assholes are back already.
07:14What are you talking about?!
07:21Hey, Pencil Neck! I'm Dylan's top enforcer.
07:24Either get the hell out of this water, or kneel and call me daddy.
07:28Dylan Hook, speak up man, my ears are shot.
07:31Keep acting tough!
07:32Jax can stomp boulders to dust!
07:34Even Narius' sea folk give him a wide burn!
07:49You asked for this.
07:50You asked for this.
08:03You one-shotted pants-toppin' orcer?!
08:05Who the hell are you?!
08:15You one-shotted pants-toppin' orcer?!
08:17Asshole. Using my divine power to barbecue.
08:20Hope you die alone and miserable.
08:24What are you whining about?
08:26Nothing!
08:27Heat's too low. Sprinkle this and baste it again.
08:35Molly? Gods make heroes with it, you seasoned food?
08:41Huh. Tide barrier just got tripped.
08:50Mommy, is daddy stationed way out in the deep sea?
08:53Is that why he never comes to see me?
08:56Yeah, baby.
08:57But he retired recently.
08:59We're gonna find him now.
09:01Don't, don't, don't, don't.
09:09I'm badly wounded.
09:10I don't have much time.
09:12Find Lily's real father.
09:14Leave her with him.
09:16I just hope you two can live in peace.
09:20Far away from those bastards on Mount Olympus.
09:35There it is.
09:44Liara's wounded bad.
09:46Drag them both back to the Dillon.
09:48Lifetime of easy living.
09:54What the hell was that?
09:56Nothing. Just swapped a bug.
10:02That girl from five years ago.
10:04You came looking for me?
10:07She's your daughter.
10:09We need you now.
10:11So you're my dad?
10:13You're actually pretty handsome.
10:16This aura?
10:17She's got my blood.
10:24Who did this?
10:25Don't worry about it.
10:27Just keep Lily safe.
10:33Mommy.
10:34Mommy!
10:52It's too late, boss.
10:54Her heartbeat's fading fast.
10:55No.
11:10Somebody help me!
11:24give me a name Leora
11:25who did this
11:27I'm going to tear them apart
11:30it was
11:52your father sold you to me a long time ago
11:55you're my fiance my property
11:57you filthy whore
11:59spread your legs for some stray dog
12:04but at least your bloodline is still worth something
12:12no let go
12:15with nymph blood in my veins
12:18even Olympus will bow to me
12:27I got careless
12:30diving near a shipwreck
12:31my fault
12:32shipwreck
12:34those cuts are surgical Leora
12:36someone did this to you
12:40you're just a regular
12:42other guy
12:43stay out of it
12:44boss
12:45soup's ready
12:52if I don't make it
12:54promise me you'll take care of Lily
12:57she's all we have left
12:59she's safe
13:00now drink
13:03soup isn't gonna fix this Jack
13:07Jack
13:14ambrosia residue
13:15golden apple sap
13:17I studied this in grad's time
13:19Greek meth said it could raise the dead for mortals
13:22where the hell did you get this
13:25more
13:25try it
13:37these ingredients
13:38where did you get them
13:44it's my first time meeting daddy
13:47I gotta find the prettiest shell for him
14:13what a lively little snack
14:15what a lively little snack
14:26I just fished this stuff out of the bay
14:28you want more
14:30I've got a ton of it laying around
14:32this guy's luck is insane
14:36a random mortal just happens to have relics of the old gods
14:40is this coast a secret Olympian vault
14:43you're safe here Liria
14:48we've got a kid together now
14:51I'm not letting anything touch
14:53you or Lily
14:56Jack
14:56I'm grateful but I
14:57Daddy
14:58help
15:01something's trying to eat me
15:05Lily's in trouble
15:12I'm not tasty
15:14my mommy and daddy are super strong
15:17please don't eat me
15:22divine power runs through this girl
15:25devour you
15:27and I might even claim the sea king's throne
15:32ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha
15:36Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh.
16:04You disgusting freak!
16:06What do you think you're doing to my daughter?
16:08Mommy!
16:11I've got you, baby.
16:14Touch my kid again, and I'll rip her head off your shoulders!
16:19Ha! You ruined my meal?
16:23Wait. The baby mama herself. Perfect.
16:32Perfect. Two courses for the price of one!
16:41You bitch!
16:47Jack, take Lily and run. Go!
16:55Run from the Lycian Hydro, you pathetic little insects.
17:07You...Posei?
17:09That kid's his. No wonder the power's so pure.
17:13That's Poseidon's bloodline. If I stay, I'm dead.
17:24What the hell just happened? It ran?
17:27Damn, Leoya. Your powers are badass. You straight up scared the monster off.
17:32Me? No way. Even at full strength, I couldn't take that thing. I'm still recovering.
17:39Wait. Maybe it sensed the Guardian of the Sea Vault?
17:44Whatever. Let's get home. That thing might circle back.
17:51About that monster.
17:57Failed at the perfect time? Figures. He's just a regular guy, after all.
18:02Failed at the dead.
18:10Oh my God!
18:13Oh my God!
18:17You're a magic engineer!
18:17No!
18:18Oh my God!
18:19Oh my God!
18:22Oh!
18:23All right!
18:24Oh my God!
18:28Oh my God!
18:31I don't wanna see more than that!
18:42My liege, have mercy, I didn't know she was your daughter, I swear it, please, spare my life.
18:49No problem.
18:50Thank you, my lord, thank you for your mercy.
18:52Try to remember that in your next life.
19:06Enjoying the show.
19:17My king, we had nothing to do with the Hydra, we swear!
19:21Listen to me, if any of you take one step near my daughter again, I will skin you alive.
19:28Now, get the fuck out of my sight.
19:31Yes, yes, my liege!
19:44My love, since you refused to tell me who did this to you, I'll just have to dig up the
19:49truth myself.
19:58That wild god Pan's always pulling power grabs.
20:02But Poseidon?
20:03Guy's long gone.
20:05Probably fish food in some trench, right?
20:07Sea god myth, ancient history.
20:10Wanna bet?
20:10There ain't no sea king anymore!
20:23The world's the same as ever.
20:26The dead are louder than the living.
20:28Who the hell are you?
20:29You're in Hades territory, asshole!
20:43Poseidon?
20:53Is Hades still breathing?
20:55If he is, tell him to get his ass out here.
21:02Who the fuck is tearing up my domain?
21:10I don't have time for this.
21:11I'm not wasting it on you.
21:13I need a background check.
21:19You know who I am?
21:21Hades' ace.
21:22You crash my spot, you die here!
21:47Little fish.
22:03Hades, you hiding? Come out, or this whole place turns into driftwood.
22:10One. Two.
22:15Thank the fates! The boss is here!
22:22Boss! This bum!
22:30You idiot! Piss off the Lord of the Oceans and we all drown. You're done. Get out.
22:35In front of Poseidon, you're ants. I'm saving your worthless heights.
22:45My Lord, is this handling satisfactory?
22:48I'm not here for fun. Dig up everything on that Leora and her daughter.
22:57Understood. I'll mobilize every team right now. You have three days. I'll be back.
23:05Everyone! Drop what you're doing! Full sweep on the Leora and child. Every resource, every contact. Now! Tell them Poseidon's
23:14back!
23:15Yes, boss!
23:21Poseidon's back. Let's hope this time he doesn't flood the place just to make a point.
23:33Dylan wants the woman dead. Kid comes with us alive. She's still hurt. Easy pickets.
23:39Let's move.
23:51We'll make a nice stew. Surprise daddy for lunch?
23:55Ha ha ha ha ha!
24:00Ha ha ha ha! A forest nymph playing happy home mater? Pathetic.
24:08Who are you?
24:11Dylan's orders. Come quietly to the stronghold. Or I drag your corpse back.
24:17Mommy? Who's the ugly goat man?
24:21Hand over the kid!
24:30Stay away from my daughter! Don't you dare touch her!
24:43Don't you dare touch her!
24:49Mommy, you're bleeding.
24:51This forest is locked down. Surrender now.
24:55I'll go with you on one condition. Let my daughter go!
25:00No! No, Mommy! I'm not leaving you!
25:14Kid's mine. You die.
25:19You... poisoned me?
25:23My poison fog. The more you fight, the faster it rots you from the inside.
25:29Give up!
25:31You've gone too far. Even if I die today, I'm not letting you win.
25:38You're wounded. Poisoned. Done. The kid's coming with me.
25:47Don't touch her! Come at me!
25:50Feisty one, Dylan wants you dead. But first, I'm gonna have some fun.
26:03Such a pretty face. All mine now.
26:09Let my mommy go, you bastard!
26:13Ah!
26:19Lily! Lily! Run! Get out of here!
26:26Serve me well, and I might let her run a little longer.
26:36Lily!
26:38Lily!
26:40Lily!
26:44Daddy?
26:50Your hands off her!
26:59You touch my woman, you're a dead man.
27:08Jack...
27:09What the hell just happened?
27:14You okay, babe?
27:16So you're the boyfriend.
27:17Too bad, I'll snap every bone in your body with one hand.
27:33No!
27:34No!
27:45If I pull this vine, the whole cliff goes with us, demon.
27:50Run all you want!
27:51My pack tears you both apart!
28:05No!
28:09No!
28:11No!
28:12No!
28:14No!
28:15No!
28:15No!
28:19No!
28:21Oh, my God.
28:53Daddy, don't leave Mommy. I don't want to lose her.
28:57Shh, Lily. Don't cry. Daddy promises Mommy's going to be okay. We're going back for her right now.
29:09Hand over the kid. I'll make your death quick.
29:20Lily, turn around and cover your ears, okay?
29:25Daddy's going to do a little magic trick.
29:28Okay.
29:32You are the best.
29:41Some nobody dare stare me down? You're asking to die.
29:48You're not human. Who the hell are you?
29:51My daughter's here, so I'm keeping it clean. Disappear.
30:13Okay, Lily. You can turn around now.
30:19Daddy? What happened to the bad guy?
30:23He got so dazzled by how cute you are, he just passed out.
30:32Lily, stay right here inside this circle. Don't move. Daddy's going to help Mommy beat the bad guys. I'll be
30:38right back.
30:43Daddy, be careful.
30:46Don't worry, Lily. No one's ever beaten your dad.
30:55That poison's eaten you alive, little nymph.
30:58How much longer you got? Let me have my fun first.
31:03So what? I'll drag you to hell with me before I die.
31:18Damn. You take a hit well.
31:21Let's enjoy this body.
31:23Then I'll turn you into my eternal trophy.
31:26For Jack and Lily, even if I die, I'm taking this beast down with me.
31:33No signal? You trying to hog the glory?
31:36More coming. Killing one won't save Jack and Lily. No choice.
31:40I'm taking them down with me.
31:42This the woman Dylan wants?
31:44Where the kid?
31:45Some guy took the brat.
31:48Useless.
31:49Grab her first, then we hunt the child.
31:55Just let Jack and Lily be safe.
32:01You all want to come at once?
32:03Then die together.
32:04Pick your graves.
32:17Why did you come back?
32:19Where's Lily?
32:23Lily's safe.
32:24Don't push yourself.
32:28So this is the woman's secret lover.
32:31Her taste is trash.
32:33Beg now.
32:34And maybe I'll leave your corpses in one piece.
32:37Refuse, and you'll be screaming.
32:40End it fast.
32:44You, in our eyes, you're not even an enemy.
32:47Just weeds to be crushed under feet.
32:50Just hold on a little longer.
32:53Jack means more to me than anything.
32:55I won't let him get hurt.
32:57No!
33:03No!
33:04No!
33:06No!
33:07No!
33:08No!
33:08No!
33:11No!
33:13No!
33:15No!
33:16No!
33:18No!
33:42You're half dead already!
33:45How the hell did you knock me back?
33:47The sea is sinking.
33:48Those are Poseidon's warriors.
33:52This can't be.
34:17Ancient Ekethra.
34:19The coastal legend monster?
34:22Why would she be here?
34:25Ha ha ha!
34:26Our boss has real backing!
34:28He summoned three of Poseidon's elite guards!
34:31No matter how strong you are, kneel and beg!
34:35They're coming for us.
34:36We're finished.
34:38Don't worry, darling.
34:39Things might turn around.
34:40Lyra Vale has been captured.
34:42Now, we await the Sea King's warriors to execute this peasant.
34:48They're here for me!
34:49Jack, stay behind me!
34:51With me here, no one touches you.
34:54Stop saying that, Jack!
34:55Look around!
34:56We're surrounded!
34:56We could actually die here!
35:04My lords!
35:05Let me teach this adulterous couple a lesson!
35:12You worthless creature!
35:14You shouldn't even exist where I stand!
35:24Who dares show such insolence before the Lord of the Sea?
35:30Who dares show such insolence before the Lord of the Sea?
35:33Who dares show such insolence before the Lord of the Sea?
35:35Who dares show such insolence before the Lord of the Sea?
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