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Girl Climber [Full Movie] [English Subs]Full EP - Full
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00:00:06Oh
00:00:30Let's go.
00:01:10Rito, open that up.
00:01:12Come on.
00:01:13Get it open.
00:01:16I totally knew it.
00:01:18I totally knew it.
00:01:21What is it?
00:01:23It's a rope.
00:01:24Get rid of that box.
00:01:26Another 12 year old would love a rope for Christmas.
00:01:29Yeah.
00:01:31Yeah.
00:01:31Come on, Em.
00:01:33Yeah.
00:01:34Woo!
00:01:35Yeah!
00:01:37Yeah!
00:01:38Yeah!
00:01:39Yeah!
00:01:39Yeah!
00:01:45Emily.
00:01:46Emily.
00:01:47Emily, where are we?
00:01:48I don't know.
00:01:50I don't know.
00:01:51We're at El Capitan.
00:01:57From Colorado, Emily Harrington.
00:02:02She's certainly a force to be reckoned with.
00:02:06Emily, make it look easy.
00:02:12Five-time national champion.
00:02:22But Emily is certainly one of the most well-rounded American female climbers.
00:02:27Part of your brain knows that this is slightly illogical.
00:02:32It is dangerous.
00:02:33But life's boring if you don't have that little element of spice, right?
00:02:38We should try to get a little bit more comfortable with being afraid.
00:02:46I love exploring my perceived limit and trying to push past it.
00:02:53uded before.
00:03:18Yeah.
00:03:19Yeah.
00:03:29Are you biting my nose?
00:03:45We got fire.
00:03:47I think this is my pee bottle.
00:03:51Nope, it's just a normal water bottle.
00:03:59A little flare in the van.
00:04:15I'm really proud of my career
00:04:17so far, but if you want to call yourself a successful all-around climber,
00:04:23you've got to be up on El Cap.
00:04:26There it is, in all its glory.
00:04:47It's always surprising how big it is.
00:04:50I never think, oh, it doesn't look that bad, or it doesn't look that big.
00:04:54It's always fucking so big.
00:04:58I don't know why no one talks about how scary it is.
00:05:04I wish I could not feel afraid anymore.
00:05:11El Capitan is a 3,200-foot granite face.
00:05:18It doesn't get much bigger.
00:05:21It doesn't get much more difficult.
00:05:22It doesn't get much more high quality than El Cap.
00:05:28It's just the most impressive, most beautiful stone in the world,
00:05:32and it's so hard to free climb.
00:05:38When you look at El Cap, it looks impossible.
00:05:41It looks smooth, and you can't imagine what there would be to climb it.
00:05:44It always attracted people that are curious to push themselves to the highest level.
00:05:52For decades, climbers have been testing themselves up there.
00:05:58Climbing El Capitan is the most badass thing that you can do as a human.
00:06:04With the exception of Lynn Hill and a few other women, it's very much like a boys' club.
00:06:09Come on! Go fast!
00:06:13When I started climbing, the first person I learned about was Lynn Hill.
00:06:18She was the first to free climb a route on El Capitan called the Nose,
00:06:23and then the following year, she went back and free climbed it in a day,
00:06:28which was the most groundbreaking, astonishing achievement.
00:06:34I didn't feel like I needed to prove anything after that.
00:06:38Because I was at the age where I wanted to have a kid, I wanted to have a family,
00:06:41and having the freedom to just go rock climbing was not going to happen forever.
00:06:47At a certain point, you have to be happy with what you've done.
00:07:02I was in Yosemite looking for a project, some sort of inspiration.
00:07:08I was working on my personal quest to free solo El Cap on the free rider,
00:07:12and she was willing to go up the wall to support me for a day of climbing.
00:07:15I got really excited because climbing with Alex on El Cap is like playing basketball with Michael Jordan.
00:07:21It's like you're with the best of the best.
00:07:25First time I met Emily was at a cliff called Jailhouse.
00:07:28She was already a very established, very successful climber.
00:07:32She was a lot better than me, and the thing that really made an impression
00:07:35was that she was all kind of done up and she had earrings and things,
00:07:38and I was like, man, how can someone climb that hard with earrings?
00:07:42She was just so well put together and going to college and doing the hardest thing at the cliff.
00:07:46You know, everything about it was just different than what I was living.
00:07:49I was like, whoa, that's a different level.
00:07:53You could tell he just didn't really care about anything but climbing.
00:07:57And he is very famous for free soloing, which is rock climbing without a rope.
00:08:05No person does what he does at his level.
00:08:11I was incredibly inspired by the way he moved.
00:08:16He was so perfect.
00:08:19He seems so at ease, and I've always envied that.
00:08:23With the Griegeron, you can climb up to the spire and, like, reflake the rope and manage.
00:08:28I'm just trying to nurture you into a simul-climbing machine.
00:08:35Good work.
00:08:37Yeah, good work.
00:08:39Good work.
00:08:40That was good.
00:08:41There's no way I would have done any of that without you.
00:08:44Isn't that pretty rad?
00:08:45That was pretty rad.
00:08:46That was a life experience.
00:08:47Yeah.
00:08:49I don't think you could do that in a day.
00:08:51You do?
00:08:52Yeah.
00:08:53I don't think it'd be that bad for you because you just have the base fitness that you need,
00:08:56you know?
00:08:56Yeah.
00:08:57It'd definitely be a dream.
00:08:59Yeah, it'd be sick.
00:09:00Just gotta start somewhere.
00:09:01Yeah.
00:09:03I mean, you know.
00:09:05That's when I first thought of trying to free climb El Cap in less than 24 hours.
00:09:12Climbing it in a day is the epitome of hard rock climbing.
00:09:16And there's a desire to prove myself.
00:09:18Like, I do deserve to be here.
00:09:20I do deserve to be climbing with all of these people that I've looked up to and idolized
00:09:25for a long time.
00:09:27That's awesome.
00:09:28That's pretty good.
00:09:29I like a dagger, too.
00:09:31It's the sense of belonging that I want.
00:09:48I see some big wet streaks, but I also see dry rock, so it's kind of a mixed bag up
00:09:55there.
00:09:58It is not going to change a single thing.
00:10:03Most people free climb El Cap over five days or so.
00:10:06It's so much harder to free climb El Cap in a day.
00:10:11The difference between doing a multi-day ascent and doing a one-day ascent is huge.
00:10:16To climb that thing in a day, it's outrageous.
00:10:19It's an audacious undertaking.
00:10:23I'm left wondering whether she can pull it off.
00:10:28Most people who free climb El Cap in a day have done it via the free rider because it's
00:10:33the easiest route.
00:10:34I wanted to do a more challenging route, and that's why I chose Golden Gate.
00:10:41There are very few climbers who have free climbed any route on El Cap in a day other than the
00:10:46free rider.
00:10:47Golden Gate is quite a bit harder.
00:10:50Golden Gate has only been free climbed in a day by three people.
00:10:53Three of the best El Cap climbers in the world.
00:11:00These guys are heroes of mine, and I want to be a part of that group.
00:11:11Golden Gate has 34 pitches.
00:11:14My goal is to climb from the beginning of each pitch to the end without falling.
00:11:19That will be a free ascent.
00:11:21If I fall, I have to go back to the beginning of that pitch and try again.
00:11:26And I need to do this in under 24 hours.
00:11:36That's going to be really hard for her.
00:11:38I give her a 20% chance of sending, honestly.
00:11:42She just hasn't paid her dues like Honnold has.
00:11:52It's hard to put yourself out there and say you're going to try to do the hardest thing
00:11:57you've ever done.
00:11:58Just because I'm trying to protect myself from people finding out that I'm afraid or that
00:12:03I fail or that I'm just like everyone else.
00:12:08I mean, I don't want to say it's mansplaining, but primarily there's men that have accomplished
00:12:12this goal.
00:12:13And so it's like, I get a lot of advice and it's a lot of like, oh, you need to
00:12:18be committed
00:12:18to this and you need to go here for this amount of time and you need to do it this
00:12:21way.
00:12:22And you should be doing this and you should be doing that.
00:12:23But I've been climbing for 22 years, like I know how to approach a goal.
00:12:31I don't need someone to tell me how to do it.
00:12:35But obviously that's a hard, that's a hard thing to convince yourself of as well.
00:12:40It's hard for me to convince myself that I know what I'm doing.
00:12:44Do you think I need more than one three?
00:12:45I wouldn't even take the three.
00:12:46Oh my God.
00:12:48Maybe I don't need this and two purples.
00:12:51I always had it in my mind ever since he asked me to support him that he would probably
00:12:56be willing to support me on Golden Gate.
00:12:59I'd like to think I may be the best supporter in the world for El Cap, just because I know
00:13:04the roots really well.
00:13:04I've worked on them a long time.
00:13:06I don't think anyone has climbed any of those parts of the wall faster.
00:13:09Are you climbing the monster with just one six?
00:13:11Yeah.
00:13:12Awesome.
00:13:12And I wanted to help Emily achieve this big dream of hers.
00:13:16Alex is very comfortable, very confident, but I also trust him.
00:13:20Having someone up there who you can tell is right at home makes me feel that much more
00:13:26comfortable.
00:13:26I'll give you that.
00:13:28Go up and try your best and...
00:13:30That's all I'm doing.
00:13:30I'm just going to go try.
00:13:31Move by move, you just do your best and see how it plays out.
00:13:34I'm allowed to fall.
00:13:36Yeah.
00:13:36I mean, that's the beautiful thing.
00:13:37You have a rope.
00:13:38It's like a good shit.
00:13:40I'm really happy that I have a rope.
00:13:45It's like a good...
00:13:46I'm just going to find a little bit more.
00:13:54It's like a good one.
00:14:03All right.
00:14:05It's like a good thing.
00:14:05It's called a good thing.
00:14:06It's like a good thing.
00:14:06You have a good thing.
00:14:08So, you're out there.
00:14:10I don't know if you're doing that.
00:14:11You're out there.
00:14:11I'm going to take a time, enjoy.
00:14:16Remember, climbing mountain is fun.
00:14:35The way that I climb the bottom 2,000 feet of the route with Alex is something called simul climbing.
00:14:40So I'm leading, placing gear, and Alex is following, climbing at the same time as me.
00:14:46So we're moving up the wall together, and it enables you to move a lot faster,
00:14:52but it cuts some corners because you're placing less safety equipment between yourself and your partner.
00:14:58So if either of us falls, we can get severely injured or we could die.
00:15:03But this is really the only way to climb it in a day.
00:15:08I was kind of proud of myself, honestly.
00:15:10Yeah, that was good.
00:15:11I just hand-over-handed the rope. I was like, fuck that.
00:15:34That was the easiest that the monster has ever felt, but it's still really hard.
00:15:40That was way faster than ever before.
00:15:43Oh, yeah?
00:15:43Yeah, like 45 minutes.
00:15:48You've found 2,000 feet already. You may as well climb one more picture.
00:15:51I'm going to try. I don't know if I can, though.
00:15:53Yeah, of course you can. Just get in there and engage.
00:15:59Alright, you need someone to, like, punch in the nuts.
00:16:00I have nuts.
00:16:02I have nuts.
00:16:02Ovaries.
00:16:03I have roots.
00:16:15You're doing great.
00:16:16Thank you. I really appreciate it. I'm really digging deep here.
00:16:18I mean, this is, you know, this is, uh...
00:16:20This is my first effort.
00:16:21Yeah.
00:16:22Do you think it's worth giving it one to the death effort?
00:16:25I mean, I've been trying to give it to the death.
00:16:27Yeah, what is that to the death?
00:16:28It seems a little, like, worky.
00:16:31If we decide to go down, let's fully debrief.
00:16:34Like, what are you going to do differently?
00:16:35What are you going to do better?
00:16:36Where can you save energy?
00:16:38Yeah.
00:16:39Because, I mean, obviously there's a ton of room for improvement today.
00:16:41A lot of room for improvement.
00:16:47Yeah, that's crazy.
00:16:53It just went from perfectly okay to perfectly not okay.
00:16:58Oh!
00:16:59Oh my god, it hurts so bad.
00:17:07Hey, give me a hug.
00:17:08Oh, you needed a hug from you all day.
00:17:11These bruises are just all from one pitch.
00:17:14I was secretly happy that we got rained off because everything just felt so hard.
00:17:24I don't really foresee me trying again this spring.
00:17:27I'm kind of worked over from the season.
00:17:31I didn't feel ready, and I haven't put in the work in order to be successful.
00:17:54Oh!
00:17:55That was her first wetsuit.
00:17:58Look at how tiny that little thing is.
00:18:00Here you go.
00:18:02Here's a bunch of trophies.
00:18:05Climbing stuff first place.
00:18:10Junior nationals.
00:18:12Oh, when she was 12 years old.
00:18:15I don't remember what that one was.
00:18:19What's that one from?
00:18:22Sierra shovel.
00:18:23Oh yeah, this is the World Cup she won.
00:18:28Oh, there's the little mohawk.
00:18:30Look at that mohawk.
00:18:35I would say I had like a very normal childhood.
00:18:40My dad was really into any activity that was in the mountains.
00:18:45Ski.
00:18:50Turns.
00:18:51Growing up, I had this idea that girls were inferior in some way.
00:18:58I desperately wanted to prove that I wasn't like that.
00:19:05I grew up with my two cousins who were boys,
00:19:08and we were super competitive with each other.
00:19:11All I wanted to do was be better than them.
00:19:15I wanted to do well in everything, and I tried really hard.
00:19:23When I found climbing, this switch went off.
00:19:29It was like instantly that's what I wanted to do.
00:19:34The feeling of lightness and strength and invincibility was pretty profound.
00:19:46I liked the feeling of success.
00:19:52And if I didn't measure up to that,
00:19:57I was so upset and disappointed.
00:20:05Competitions, being the best, winning.
00:20:08To me, that was what climbing was.
00:20:15I definitely started putting more pressure on myself.
00:20:19My self-worth was so tied to my success in climbing.
00:20:24And then my success in climbing was tied to my weight.
00:20:30The less mass you have, the easier it's going to be to stay on the wall.
00:20:35It just became this cycle of punishment.
00:20:38I remember being completely exhausted all the time.
00:20:43She was so thin.
00:20:46And I didn't know what to do.
00:20:47And I remember her hands were orange.
00:20:51Because all she was eating was carrots.
00:20:53And I wasn't sleeping well.
00:20:56And I was dizzy sometimes.
00:21:00And then climbing wasn't very fun.
00:21:04I feel like I barely laughed.
00:21:08I started realizing that this isn't how I want to live my life.
00:21:13And is climbing going to be a positive force in my life?
00:21:18Or is it always going to be this negative thing?
00:21:24I guess now is the best time.
00:21:26And here is the best place to say this.
00:21:28I have an eating disorder.
00:21:30I can't admit it to anybody else.
00:21:32But at least I can admit it to myself.
00:21:35I feel out of control when I indulge in food.
00:21:38And my all-or-nothing behavior makes me depressed and unhappy.
00:21:43I don't ever give myself a break.
00:21:45I want to be perfect all the time.
00:21:47I must run fast, climb strong, and eat as little as possible.
00:22:01Eventually my body and my brain just couldn't really handle all the stress and the pressures.
00:22:07I realized that competing wasn't something that I really wanted to do anymore.
00:22:16The pivotal thing that happened was I joined the North Face athlete team and got invited on an expedition to
00:22:25Mount Everest.
00:22:28I had no idea what it would do for me in my life.
00:22:34She was keen to try out mountain climbing.
00:22:38So I was like, oh, first mountain climbing trip? How about Everest?
00:22:42A little bit crazy, but why not?
00:22:46It's the tallest and most precipitous mountain range on our planet.
00:22:50If you want to test your mettle, that's where you go.
00:22:53I remember just saying, Emily, no, I do not want you going to Everest.
00:22:59Tim said to her, you're not going. And she said, Dad, I'm not 16.
00:23:04And that was the end of that.
00:23:08Emily at 25, barely coming out of the gym as a gym climber, and then being on Everest.
00:23:15I mean, that's a huge leap to me.
00:23:17I was a little, like, dark in those days, so I might have just totally written her off as a
00:23:25first impression, you know, just kind of like, whatever.
00:23:36It wasn't until I got there and realized that Conrad was, like, completely hands-off with Emily, and he was
00:23:41like, well, you step in.
00:23:42You know, and I'm like, I don't even know her. I don't want to do this. I'm not a mentor.
00:23:47I was not very helpful. I definitely am not an incredibly sympathetic person.
00:23:58I'm ready to go up tomorrow. I'm a little nervous and scared to go through the icefall.
00:24:06That's knowledge.
00:24:09Happens, like, five times a day.
00:24:11It's really unnerving.
00:24:17I want to get through the icefall, and then I'll feel okay.
00:24:28Conrad saw something in her, and he was right.
00:24:35She just didn't give in.
00:24:42Emily, what's up?
00:24:44Nice job, Em.
00:24:48I came to care immensely for Emily over the time of that trip.
00:24:54We talked about my relationship, we talked about my climbing, we talked about her kids, and how much she missed
00:24:59her kids, and just life.
00:25:01And it gave me a peek into what my life could be like in the future.
00:25:11Hey.
00:25:13I'm at the South Coal.
00:25:16Getting ready to go up for the summit.
00:25:24Just stuck behind a line of people.
00:25:28She passed me, and she was by herself.
00:25:30And I was like, Emily, why are you by yourself?
00:25:31Where's the Sherpa that you were climbing with?
00:25:34She was like, oh, God, I feel so bad.
00:25:36He was slow, so I left him behind.
00:25:39Was that really bad? Should I go back and get him?
00:25:48She crushed it.
00:25:51It was so out of her main sport that it just was all the more of a huge achievement.
00:25:59As a climber, you're the sum total of all your ascents and expeditions.
00:26:04And each experience that you have builds into who you are as a climber, and Emily got that.
00:26:11I was a lot stronger than I thought I would be.
00:26:15Climbing on Everest has made me appreciate the style of climbing that I do.
00:26:20I do want to continue to be in the mountains and to learn from them.
00:26:26Hello.
00:26:42Hello.
00:26:43Good morning.
00:26:45Here's your coffee.
00:26:50I sat up late last night and got all these emails and texts with China and Nepal and Tibet.
00:26:55and I'm like scared to turn on their phone
00:26:56and see what everyone wrote.
00:26:59Come back to bed.
00:27:01No.
00:27:03I have an interview in 15 minutes.
00:27:06Okay, I'll make breakfast.
00:27:09Hi, this is Adrian.
00:27:12Doing some final prep for a big trip
00:27:14I'm leaving on early next week.
00:27:16You know, the average Everest expedition
00:27:18is two months long and I'm probably away,
00:27:22you know, seven to eight months a year
00:27:24and you're still traveling and climbing around the world.
00:27:28Adrian is a high altitude climber and a mountain guide
00:27:32who spends a lot of time in the Himalaya.
00:27:35We met at Camp 2 on Mount Everest.
00:27:41I just remember this charismatic guy.
00:27:44He was super nice and fun to talk to.
00:27:48The sad fact of high altitude climbing
00:27:51is there's just not many women.
00:27:53I certainly noticed Emily as an anomaly.
00:27:57But 21,000 feet is really miserable.
00:28:00So you kind of like have a crushing headache
00:28:02at the same time that you're trying to be like social
00:28:04and funny and interesting.
00:28:05It's not like a great flirting opportunity.
00:28:08It was this really powerful connection that we had.
00:28:11I'd never felt like that with anyone before.
00:28:14And we knew that we wanted to stay connected.
00:28:20Adrian is gone most of the year, guiding in the Himalaya.
00:28:23And because I have this big project I'm working on,
00:28:26we are going to spend the next four months apart.
00:28:30I don't really look forward to this time of year as it is
00:28:34because Adrian is going to be gone for a really long time.
00:28:36and I have a lot of, like I put a lot of pressure on myself
00:28:41for my own projects.
00:28:42No.
00:28:46I've spent a lot of time with people
00:28:48who have lost their partner in the mountains.
00:28:51And every time he leaves, I have this part of me
00:28:55that is afraid he won't come back.
00:29:00Yes.
00:29:02The secret stash.
00:29:05Okay, I'm overwhelmed again.
00:29:07I'm going to go eat some toast.
00:29:08I'm really overwhelmed right now.
00:29:10Good night.
00:29:11Here we go.
00:29:15It kind of sucks.
00:29:20Cat stuff.
00:29:21I have food.
00:29:23Coffee stuff.
00:29:25Music.
00:29:26Music.
00:29:27Bed.
00:29:39And she's off.
00:29:45It's always hard.
00:29:47This one especially.
00:29:58I'm going to Moab because I want to prepare
00:30:02for the upcoming Yosemite season.
00:30:04And Moab is a great place to do that.
00:30:09Last spring, I just wasn't ready.
00:30:11I hadn't put in the work.
00:30:14Music.
00:30:15Music.
00:30:18Look at these nails, too.
00:30:20These are the gel nail.
00:30:21Gel nail magic.
00:30:22It's supposed to last for like three months.
00:30:28I did not grow up learning how to crack climb.
00:30:32And for climbing in Yosemite, it's a required skill.
00:30:37Music.
00:30:38Music.
00:30:41Music.
00:30:45I wouldn't consider myself a super confident person
00:30:49when I'm standing on the ground.
00:30:50It's more why I'm like climbing.
00:30:53That my confidence shines through.
00:30:56Music.
00:30:59Music.
00:31:04I think I did get better technique.
00:31:07It's nice to feel a little more confidence.
00:31:10Music.
00:31:12I'm excited to go to Yosemite.
00:31:13I'm excited to go to Yosemite.
00:31:19Music.
00:31:45I've been in Yosemite now for a few weeks, training on Golden Gate.
00:31:49It's been long days, hiking in and practicing the harder pitches.
00:31:54It's really the only way to know every pitch for that in a day attempt.
00:32:02There's five hard sections of the route for me.
00:32:07The first one that comes up is the monster.
00:32:10You have to kind of wedge your body into this crack.
00:32:14And this pitch is almost 200 feet long.
00:32:17The monster off-width is harder if your foot can't bridge the crack.
00:32:20My foot can span between one side of the crack and the other side, so I can easily wedge one
00:32:24foot and push upward.
00:32:26If you have a smaller foot, it's harder to make upward progress.
00:32:36The next pitch that's really hard for me is called the down climb.
00:32:41There's essentially no hold.
00:32:43You're kind of standing on a less than vertical, smooth surface, just pasting your feet on the
00:32:51wall and using the friction in order to stick.
00:32:55Your balance has to be pretty perfect in order to not get spit off.
00:33:01Oh, that was it.
00:33:05The next hard pitch is called the move.
00:33:08At the end of the pitch, there's a really hard boulder problem.
00:33:12So, a series of really hard moves.
00:33:18For me, it's the most powerful section of the route.
00:33:21It has the hardest single moves.
00:33:26The next section is called the golden desert.
00:33:30It is a really long crack climb mixed with some funky traversing under a roof.
00:33:40And then the very next pitch after that is called the A5 Traverse.
00:33:45And that's kind of the pitch that guards you from success.
00:33:50Imagine traversing this steep, sloping rail and trying to stand on feet that are the width
00:33:56of dimes.
00:33:58The A5 Traverse is the spot where most people fail.
00:34:02By the time you've climbed almost 3,000 feet to get there, your arms are just incredibly
00:34:05tired and it's really hard to hang on them.
00:34:10I'm still a little nervous about the A5 Traverse.
00:34:42Thankfully, Adrian came home from Everest.
00:34:45Everything was fine, but there was weeks there where I thought he might not.
00:34:51It's not really that safe, even if you make good decisions.
00:34:55Is it true?
00:34:56That I thought you might die?
00:34:57Yeah.
00:34:59I thought you might die.
00:35:00And I was trying to be...
00:35:01So you figured you'd start moving on right away?
00:35:03Yeah.
00:35:04Just going to be a bachelorette and like be just in my little world, independent.
00:35:10It could happen.
00:35:11It could be the other way around.
00:35:13Yeah.
00:35:13I think I think about it less, but I think about it sometimes as you start speed climbing
00:35:17more and more.
00:35:18Cutting corners.
00:35:20Rock fall.
00:35:22There's plenty of things that can kill you.
00:35:23It's a little bit of a stretch, but I'm not going to die.
00:35:26I'm not going to die rock climbing.
00:35:28But you've got to think about it and acknowledge it's a possibility.
00:35:30It's true.
00:35:31I just think that I've finally like come to a place where I'm okay, not okay, but more
00:35:40okay.
00:35:41More okay is good.
00:35:43Yeah.
00:35:50Okay.
00:35:51Questions.
00:35:52Okay.
00:35:52Get married already.
00:35:53When are you getting married?
00:35:54Are you going to have babies?
00:35:55Babies.
00:35:56Get married already.
00:35:58Um, do you plan on having kids soon?
00:36:01Okay.
00:36:02Um, I, I do plan on having kids eventually.
00:36:06I think I want one kid, so I'm not really in like a huge rush.
00:36:12I, I say we, we, right?
00:36:14We.
00:36:15I think I've come around.
00:36:16We kind of settled on one because Adrian wanted like three.
00:36:20Teen.
00:36:21Um, but I just want one.
00:36:23So I'm not in a rush.
00:36:24And I have like, we both have things we want to do first.
00:36:27I've got a couple about asking me about LCAP and what happened.
00:36:31And if I'm going back, basically I, I failed and I also had terrible weather, but that's
00:36:37like a second part of it, um, that prevented me from succeeding.
00:36:41And then yes, I'm going back in the fall.
00:37:00So we got two liters of water.
00:37:01Okay.
00:37:02I have extra shock.
00:37:04Okay.
00:37:05Cool.
00:37:06Are you taking that much extra shock?
00:37:08I'm very concerned about the heat.
00:37:10It weighs nothing.
00:37:12I guess.
00:37:13It just, it seems like a lot of shock for, yeah.
00:37:15We don't have to bring it.
00:37:16No, no.
00:37:17No, but I actually really want to.
00:37:18If you think it'll make you feel better, it definitely makes me feel better.
00:37:20Okay.
00:37:21Extra shock.
00:37:21I'm bringing these.
00:37:22It's really hot.
00:37:23What are those?
00:37:24They're breakable ice packs for my hands and feet.
00:37:28That seems totally absurd.
00:37:30So if we want to climb by three, what time should we meet in the meadow?
00:37:33Well, like 2.30.
00:37:342.30.
00:37:35That's like pretty early though.
00:37:37Pretty early.
00:37:58Okay.
00:38:06Nice job, man.
00:38:08Nice.
00:38:10Nice job, man.
00:38:24Nice.
00:38:46Nice job, man.
00:38:46Come on.
00:38:47Come on, Al.
00:38:47Come on.
00:38:47Oh, good.
00:38:48Come on.
00:38:49Come on.
00:38:49You're good.
00:38:50Come on, come on.
00:38:51Come on.
00:38:52Yeah, hot yeah.
00:38:54Come on.
00:38:56Always.
00:38:56Very good.
00:38:57Come on, Al.
00:39:02All right.
00:39:08if you do it today in this style just like you just did it be pretty sick
00:39:16think about how good that's gonna feel i can't yet i gotta finish the rest of it
00:39:28yeah we started 11 and a half hours ago so it's a good time actually
00:39:34this is when you rely on your your world cup fitness
00:39:50pretty sure you can just climb one more pitch pretty sure there's like five
00:39:56more pitches
00:40:13good i'm falling no no you're okay come on no it's too much
00:40:17stay with it it just fucked everything up and like that's all right oh my god
00:40:31really good yeah really good
00:40:46i don't have it you guys i don't have it
00:40:51i'm just too tired i'm giving it everything i have
00:40:58just couldn't do it i couldn't keep climbing i'm like super bummed but it's like everything i could
00:41:06possibly do i failed on the last hard pitch pretty heartbroken
00:41:28i think you have to try things that you're afraid of that you might suck at
00:41:34that you're gonna most likely fail at in order to actually really
00:41:39get to know yourself and and know what you're capable of
00:41:49when i was trying to figure out how to make a team to go
00:41:53on this seven week totally unknown jungle bashing crazy alpine myanmar expedition
00:42:02i wanted emily to go like i wanted her to go more than anyone like i wouldn't go if emily
00:42:10didn't go
00:42:11this is like an anti-everest trip
00:42:18think of everest from the minute you get off the plane to the summit of everest every step of the
00:42:23way is
00:42:23mapped out pakaka borazzi was exactly the opposite
00:42:29wanting her on the team was met with a lot of resistance but i put my foot down and she
00:42:35was stoked to do it
00:42:45it was a month before we even got to be scanned we had to cut our gear by two-thirds
00:42:53and ran out of food a lot of the things that i did today i've never done before
00:43:22it's scary the heavy pack peel off that ones a little good job am thank you
00:43:31way more rad way more gnarly than everest
00:43:38my favorite day on that whole climb was emily and i were stuck on this ridge for 48 hours
00:43:48winds blowing 60 miles an hour non-stop
00:43:53and at one point emily looks at me and she's like what do you think you think we're gonna be
00:43:57okay
00:43:58i looked at her and i was like i don't i don't know
00:44:01i hope so and she was like all right cool okay
00:44:10and five minutes later we're laughing and like doing what we can to like stay alive
00:44:18emily and i have talked a lot about how crazy it was and how strung out we were and how
00:44:24close to just like laying down on the trail and giving up we were and we just didn't
00:44:31she was everything i expected her to be on that trip she was gritty she was funny she helped me
00:44:38when i
00:44:38was low she tackled massive scary things
00:44:43she was so nice
00:44:583 30 in the morning november 20 something
00:45:08dragged everyone into helping me climb el cap in a day
00:45:15A massive snowstorm is approaching, like tomorrow, so, last day of the season, basically, dragging
00:45:24everyone up here to support me one more time.
00:45:26One more character building day on the mountain.
00:45:28One more character building day on the mountain.
00:45:31It's like 4 a.m.
00:45:33It's way colder than it was last time, so that's good.
00:45:36If you were really pro, you'd be racked onto the harness already and pack your harness
00:45:40that way.
00:45:41Oh yeah, I didn't do that.
00:45:42I didn't do it.
00:45:43You guys needed it last time.
00:45:45Ten more feet today, okay?
00:45:47Yeah, exactly, exactly.
00:45:49Ten more feet today.
00:45:53Go, Em, go.
00:45:54Here we go.
00:45:55You're gonna crush it.
00:45:56Thanks, Sonny.
00:46:04Nice, Em.
00:46:07You're crushing.
00:46:09It's so, such a still day.
00:46:11Yeah, from the captain.
00:46:30Creaky old grandpa, I'll sit down and tighten the shoes up.
00:46:36Nice, Em.
00:46:38Oh my God.
00:46:44Are you okay, Em?
00:46:45Emily, are you okay?
00:46:49Em?
00:46:50Holy shit.
00:46:52Oh my God, Em.
00:46:56Should I lower you to the ledge?
00:46:57Emily, you're okay.
00:47:02Okay.
00:47:03Em?
00:47:05Talk to us.
00:47:07Talk to us, Em.
00:47:08Are you okay?
00:47:09Are you right side up?
00:47:13She's not right side up.
00:47:15Fuck.
00:47:16Can you confirm your number is 404 seconds?
00:47:18Correct.
00:47:19Okay, I'm gonna be on hold while I try to get a razor, okay?
00:47:22Okay, thank you.
00:47:30Hang in there, Em.
00:47:36You know, I can tell that it's terrible.
00:47:37It's all terrible.
00:47:38Like, you can tell it's a giant fall.
00:47:41The only thing I was thinking about was whether or not she'll walk again.
00:48:20I've found this pitch so many times.
00:48:23I know it's slippery, but I've never fallen.
00:48:25I know my feet are cold, but I need to be confident.
00:48:30I wasn't scared, I just...
00:48:35Now it's scary though, to think about.
00:48:49Oh, I'm sorry guys.
00:49:00Yeah.
00:49:01Still have some stuff to learn, I guess.
00:49:08I'm sorry five times.
00:49:10Mogul?
00:49:26I'm sorry.
00:49:29I think it, okay, my完成 did a lot more time,
00:49:29that's right, I know.
00:49:29Do you think we have another place to go.
00:49:30Okay, in inaker, I'm sorry.
00:49:33Who's май hold cannot separate.
00:49:35And I was very reagent to ask you all,
00:49:37but I'm just恭喜 you.
00:49:37El Capitan, rescued by one of the most famous climbers in the world.
00:49:41Falls are apparel of the sport, no matter your skill level.
00:49:45Thank goodness she was with people like Alex Hunnell.
00:49:48The climber at the center of that Oscar-winning documentary Free Solo.
00:49:51I was blank, so I'm holding the rope.
00:49:52But then when she fell, so much rope fell into the system,
00:49:55like so much rope pooled at my feet, basically,
00:49:57that I wound up actually grabbing the rope with my hands
00:50:01in an effort to catch her sooner.
00:50:03I don't know if you guys had a chance to watch Free Solo.
00:50:05Oh, he was...
00:50:06I mean, it's amazing what they do,
00:50:08and boy, you're going to have some nerves of steel.
00:50:10Yes, you do.
00:50:11You sure do.
00:50:11Hope you have a full recovery.
00:50:15How are you feeling about it all?
00:50:18Shitty.
00:50:19Shitty?
00:50:19Shitty about it.
00:50:20But sad.
00:50:21Yeah.
00:50:24Everyone is interested in El Cap,
00:50:27and everyone is interested in the fact that I was climbing with Alex Hunnell,
00:50:30so they want to write a story about the damsel in distress
00:50:33who was rescued by the Free Solo star.
00:50:37Oh, adrenaline junkies, like,
00:50:40risking their lives and falling off of sheer cliffs
00:50:43and gets rescued.
00:50:44Like, it's just stupid and not true,
00:50:46and it's misunderstood.
00:50:48I had a bad fall climbing
00:50:49because rock climbing is inherently dangerous, but...
00:50:53And Alex did exactly what any good partner would do.
00:50:57Yeah, and that's the end of the story.
00:50:59Don't look at that close to me, I know.
00:51:02We were choosing to take a certain level of risk that day.
00:51:07It was 100% not his fault what happened.
00:51:10It was 100% not his fault.
00:51:43I was afraid of not being good enough,
00:51:45and now the entire world thinks that as well.
00:51:56She is no Alex Honnold.
00:51:58Do this without the security of a rope,
00:52:00and then you can pretend to have accomplished something.
00:52:05Woman, go back to kitchen, please.
00:52:08Let man's doing this stuff.
00:52:10She's too fat.
00:52:27I'm bruised and have a rope burn on my neck
00:52:30and a pretty intense concussion.
00:52:33I'm slowly recovering,
00:52:35but mentally I'm struggling.
00:52:41I just spiral into the negativity of,
00:52:44oh, I'm never going to be able to get anywhere with this.
00:52:50Lots of doubt and lots of kind of like questioning of like,
00:52:53why am I doing this?
00:52:54Why am I even like trying so hard?
00:52:57And just feel like giving up.
00:53:00There's just this really big fear,
00:53:01and it's all circling around like the whole kid thing,
00:53:04and the clock is ticking idea,
00:53:07and I really do want to have fun and enjoy climbing.
00:53:12I do.
00:53:12I just don't know how right now.
00:53:15Yeah.
00:53:16It's hard to trust myself, I guess.
00:53:34It's Passover.
00:53:35Happy Passover, guys.
00:53:37Hogsamehack, John.
00:53:38Hogsamehack to you.
00:53:39And we can tell that it's Passover
00:53:41because we are in our houses,
00:53:43hiding from a plague,
00:53:44and because in a recent...
00:53:46Breakfast, podcast, very loud podcast.
00:53:48That smearing blood on your door will stop coronavirus.
00:53:51We're going to find it.
00:53:52Tell me that.
00:53:54We are one day short of a month since we've been home.
00:53:58April 12th, Easter Sunday,
00:54:04and it's Sunday,
00:54:05but it doesn't really matter that it's Sunday.
00:54:08Every day is pretty much very similar.
00:54:15Adrian and I have been physically together
00:54:17for longer than we have ever been.
00:54:21It's felt like this period of deep connection.
00:54:26What's your favorite color?
00:54:28This is like a rapid-fire question.
00:54:31Oh, really?
00:54:31I actually...
00:54:32I actually...
00:54:32What's your favorite color?
00:54:35Gray.
00:54:36Gray?
00:54:38That's a terrible favorite color.
00:54:41My favorite color is green.
00:54:44Really?
00:54:44Yeah.
00:54:45I never knew that.
00:54:46Well, you learn something new every day, don't you?
00:54:48I don't think I've ever bought you anything green.
00:54:50Better start now.
00:54:55We've discussed starting a family in more serious ways,
00:54:59but I really have to finish this project
00:55:02before I can start thinking about taking that step.
00:55:06I don't want to take eight years
00:55:07to free-climb Millocap in a day.
00:55:09Then I'll be 40,
00:55:10and then, you know,
00:55:12it might be too late.
00:55:25If I let something like fear,
00:55:28something like an accident,
00:55:30stop me from doing something,
00:55:32then I'll never go back.
00:55:34I'll never try something hard again.
00:55:36This is no longer just a way to prove myself.
00:55:40It's a way for me to gain back trust
00:55:45and confidence in myself.
00:55:48I need to go back.
00:55:58I've been really gentle with myself,
00:56:01just accepting that I'm probably going to be
00:56:03a little more conservative this year.
00:56:05I think I'm going to talk to Alex
00:56:07about adjusting my method
00:56:08and just be like,
00:56:09dude, I don't want to, like, go so fast.
00:56:12I want to be able to stop and take a breather,
00:56:14and I want to be able to place more gear
00:56:16and feel way more safe.
00:56:34And so it begins.
00:56:38Emily's Yosemite season.
00:56:453 a.m., I'm out of bed in coffee.
00:56:50M's waiting for a coffee.
00:56:52The life of a superstar.
00:56:57How's it feeling?
00:56:58It's okay.
00:56:59Where I fell last year.
00:57:00Where you fell last year.
00:57:02Yeah.
00:57:05I'm back in Yosemite for the first time since the accident,
00:57:08and Adrian's been helping me train on the hard pitches
00:57:11and build back that trust.
00:57:14Down to the move pitch.
00:57:25There was no, like, massive screaming whippers out of the move today.
00:57:30You just hit it every time.
00:57:32You're stronger.
00:57:33Big support today.
00:57:40Physically, I feel better than I have probably ever in my life.
00:57:45I'm trying to figure out the best tactics for climbing the monster.
00:57:50And so I'm going to try putting on my climbing shoe,
00:57:53and then I'm going to try putting on a size 42 TC Pro over top of it
00:57:59to make my foot bigger.
00:58:08I'm so excited about this.
00:58:15So what time are we thinking about starting?
00:58:17Let's say starting the monster at 6 a.m.,
00:58:19which means starting climbing at 1 a.m.
00:58:23That's what I was hoping to do tonight, you know?
00:58:25I know.
00:58:25Get some.
00:58:26You signed up for it.
00:58:27Yeah, no, no.
00:58:28I'm into it.
00:58:29Knee pads and duct tape and elbow pads.
00:58:31At this point, you're going to get to the top more fresh
00:58:33than when you left the ground.
00:58:34I think it would be tough to make this more comfortable.
00:58:37Yeah, that's the whole point.
00:58:39I think it's, yeah, exactly.
00:58:40We're ready for the long haul right now.
00:58:43I'm planning to have two partners.
00:58:45It is really valuable to have Alex as a partner because he is so fast.
00:58:50But up higher when the climbing gets slower,
00:58:52I really like having Adrian there.
00:58:55He's really good emotional support for me.
00:58:58Let's look at the bike.
00:59:08Move slowly and then, like, see how I feel when I get to that.
00:59:11Yeah, cool.
00:59:12It's the same time tomorrow as today, basically.
00:59:14I do feel ready.
00:59:15I don't think I'm going to be any more ready than I am right now.
00:59:19If I achieve this, I'll never not be a climber,
00:59:23but I can, like, move on from being, like, solely focused on climbing.
00:59:27Like, I can move forward with my life.
00:59:29I can have a family.
00:59:30Like, I could do all these things I've wanted to do
00:59:32that might not require so much, like, pinpointed focus.
00:59:38It's that meaningful.
00:59:58Boom.
01:00:02Love you.
01:00:03Have fun.
01:00:04Get some ass off there.
01:00:08Nice, Em.
01:00:17At some point in here, I'm going to have to tie my shoes
01:00:19and put them on, but I'm sort of like,
01:00:20oh, I've got flashbacks of the last year.
01:00:23PTSD.
01:00:23Yeah, exactly.
01:00:25Oh, my God, jeez.
01:00:41I'm going to run around to the top
01:00:43and hopefully get to meet them, like, two-thirds of the way up.
01:00:48Nice, Em.
01:00:49Really smooth.
01:00:53That was Em.
01:00:54She's done for free.
01:00:56Last.
01:00:57Yes.
01:00:58Great job, Deidre.
01:01:00How do you feel?
01:01:00Okay.
01:01:12I heard a call from the film team.
01:01:15Your dad might be talking to the monster,
01:01:19but you should be right on track.
01:01:27It's so funny that you're wearing two pairs of shoes.
01:01:30Oh, my God.
01:02:05Oh, so glad to have that bitch over with.
01:02:08I'm taking off all of my shoes,
01:02:09all four pairs of them that I was wearing.
01:02:15I was wearing Alex's shoes over my shoes
01:02:17so I could climb the monster easier and faster,
01:02:20and it works.
01:02:25I'll say it's not often that I encounter
01:02:27a completely new rock climbing technique on a big wall.
01:02:29This is one of those times.
01:02:31You've styled the hard stuff.
01:02:34Next, Em is going to lead us
01:02:36to the summit of the mighty El Capitan.
01:02:37That's what's happening next.
01:02:51Good, Em.
01:02:52Really nice.
01:03:02Nice and relaxed.
01:03:09Trust the beat.
01:03:13Perfect.
01:03:13That's the one.
01:03:15Perfect.
01:03:17Really good.
01:03:24Good, Em.
01:03:28Really good.
01:03:31I'm not coming down off the mountain
01:03:33until I set this route.
01:03:36I'm never climbing that bitch again.
01:03:42Nice, Em.
01:03:43Really smooth.
01:03:50I gotta say,
01:03:51you look really fit right now.
01:03:53Like, your arms are, like, muscular.
01:03:58Thanks, Alex.
01:04:00Like, have you been, like,
01:04:02working out more?
01:04:03Yeah.
01:04:05I've been putting some effort in.
01:04:08Like, have you really?
01:04:08Because you look, like,
01:04:09freaking kind of jacks.
01:04:11Yeah.
01:04:12Yeah, dude.
01:04:12I have.
01:04:16Nice.
01:04:17Come on.
01:04:19Really good.
01:04:19Come on.
01:04:20So strong.
01:04:22Come on.
01:04:23Come on.
01:04:36Come on.
01:04:37That's it.
01:04:38Come on.
01:04:39Really good.
01:04:44There you go.
01:04:45Where the hell is that?
01:04:46There you go.
01:04:48There you go.
01:04:48There you go.
01:04:48There you go.
01:04:49There you go.
01:04:49There you go.
01:04:53I had to dig really deep for that one.
01:04:57I set the move pitch on my first try.
01:05:00Everything's going well.
01:05:03Waiting for the other shoe to drop.
01:05:05I'll do it.
01:05:23I'll do it.
01:05:28I think it's going to go next to it.
01:05:30I see.
01:05:30I have to go next to it.
01:05:31I'm going to move it up.
01:05:32And what?
01:05:32otherwise looking good yeah he's infinitely better than last time
01:06:06you got it
01:06:07you got it
01:06:24it's bleeding yeah i see just a little
01:06:28want me to bring you down
01:06:42see how bad it is
01:06:51like i just don't know anymore
01:06:53about this whole hole it just feels so too hard for me
01:07:00this stupid shit just keeps happening
01:07:02no you're getting better and better every time
01:07:06i know
01:07:06i just don't feel good enough right now
01:07:18i wanted it so badly
01:07:20maybe i just wanted it too much
01:07:30this worked really hard
01:07:32no you're not done em you're not done
01:07:40stupid why did that have to happen i didn't do anything wrong i wasn't running it out i wasn't doing
01:07:46anything wrong
01:07:47i'm just scared now
01:07:50you just bumped your head
01:07:53you're fine
01:07:55you didn't break anything
01:07:57i know
01:08:00someday i'll do it
01:08:02you're gonna do it today
01:08:15i think you've got more trying you you know i'd tell you if i didn't
01:08:25i don't know i don't know
01:08:26i don't know
01:08:27i think you can do it
01:08:28you can try
01:09:23Super good.
01:09:26Super good.
01:09:27Hey, come on.
01:09:29Yeah.
01:09:30Come on.
01:09:31Don't nap for it.
01:10:36Thanks.
01:10:38No matter what happens, I'm proud of myself.
01:10:42I'm really proud of myself.
01:10:44Look at the sunset.
01:10:49Oh.
01:10:54Gotta keep climbing.
01:10:57Trying to rest before the last hard pitch.
01:11:00The A5.
01:11:01Yeah.
01:11:02The sight of...
01:11:05Last time's failure. Last year's failure.
01:11:07Mm-hmm.
01:11:09Pretty nervous for it.
01:11:12And we're out of water.
01:11:13Yeah, we are out of water. It sucks.
01:11:16Poor mountain guy planning.
01:11:22You look great.
01:11:23So proud of you.
01:11:24Have fun on this.
01:11:25This is the pitch you earn.
01:11:35Come on.
01:11:41Come on.
01:11:42Hmm.
01:11:44Come on.
01:11:48Come on.
01:11:49Come on.
01:12:02Come on.
01:12:03Come on.
01:12:10There we are.
01:12:12Come on.
01:12:16Come on.
01:12:18Come on.
01:12:22Come on.
01:12:25Come on.
01:12:27You know what to do.
01:12:47Come on.
01:12:53Come on.
01:12:54Come on.
01:13:04Mom.
01:13:09Holy shit.
01:13:11Evelyn.
01:13:13Ow.
01:13:20Oh my God.
01:13:23Holy shit.
01:13:25Holy shit, Evelyn.
01:13:34I can't believe I did that.
01:13:36Okay, I gotta keep it together.
01:13:38We gotta find more pitches.
01:13:41Oh my God.
01:13:43Dude, I'm falling so bad.
01:13:45Ladies and gentlemen.
01:13:47I've always dreamed of being able to do this.
01:13:49And now it's happening and it's just crazy how it's happening.
01:13:54It was so close so many times to falling just now.
01:13:57So close.
01:13:59But I just didn't fucking let go.
01:14:10He's just gonna be.
01:14:28Oh my God.
01:14:29Oh my God.
01:14:29Oh.
01:14:29Oh, my God.
01:14:29Oh my God.
01:14:30Oh.
01:14:30Oh.
01:14:31Oh.
01:14:31Oh.
01:14:39Oh, fuck you!
01:15:02I'm really, really happy and exhausted. My head kind of hurts and I'm thirsty and everything is perfect.
01:15:16I love you so much. Thank you. Thank you.
01:15:22You did.
01:15:27I'm so proud of you. You worked so hard.
01:15:34And you believed.
01:15:35Yeah.
01:15:382112, 2113.
01:16:01Wow!
01:16:05You heard that.
01:16:07Mm-hmm
01:16:29Can I go say hi to everyone?
01:16:31Nice work!
01:16:32Thanks!
01:16:33Well done!
01:16:34You look worse
01:16:37Actually you look pretty good
01:16:38He's went downhill a little bit after he left
01:16:40I don't know
01:16:41You have to make it after it dude
01:16:43Why'd you leave us?
01:16:45Oh my god
01:16:46That is so cute
01:16:50Dude
01:16:53Oh my god
01:16:54That is so cute
01:17:12That is so cute
01:17:14It is so cute
01:17:35It's albo
01:17:43I can still hear her voice in my head and I think about whenever something's hard or something comes
01:17:55up that's feels tricky or feels complicated especially as like a woman and a mother
01:18:03I try to think about how Hillary would handle it
01:18:19climbing is dangerous and it entails a level of risk but climbing has given me so much and I'm
01:18:25just not willing to give it up I'm excited for what's next
01:18:57I know the rise and I know the fall cause the voice inside knows me best of all
01:19:08If I can't run I'll walk or crawl I'll restart, restart
01:19:18I'll give my all to find my place My place on the wall
01:19:44I'll follow the path into the sky To kiss the heavens before I die
01:19:58Amidst the clouds the world seems small His tired heart still wants it all
01:20:10I'll find my place My place on the wall
01:20:18I'll find my place My place on the wall
01:20:27I'll give it to the fall I'll give it to the fall I'll give it my all
01:20:42Oh
01:21:02My place
01:21:03My place
01:21:07On the wall
01:21:38My place
01:21:39My place
01:21:40My place
01:21:40My place
01:21:43My place
01:21:43My place
01:21:44My place
01:21:45My place
01:21:46My place
01:21:48My place
01:21:49My place
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