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Girl Climber [Full Movie] [New Drama]Full EP - Full
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00:00:06Oh
00:00:30Let's go.
00:01:10Rito, open that up.
00:01:12Come on.
00:01:13Get it open.
00:01:16I totally knew it.
00:01:18I totally knew it.
00:01:21What is it?
00:01:23It's a rope.
00:01:24Get rid of that box.
00:01:26Another 12 year old would love a rope for Christmas.
00:01:29Yeah.
00:01:31Yeah.
00:01:31Come on, Em.
00:01:33Yeah.
00:01:34Woo!
00:01:35Yeah!
00:01:37Yeah!
00:01:38Yeah!
00:01:39Yeah!
00:01:39Yeah!
00:01:45Emily.
00:01:46Emily.
00:01:47Emily, where are we?
00:01:48I don't know.
00:01:50I don't know.
00:01:51We're at El Capitan.
00:01:57From Colorado, Emily Harrington.
00:02:02She's certainly a force to be reckoned with.
00:02:06Emily, make it look easy.
00:02:12Five-time national champion.
00:02:22But Emily is certainly one of the most well-rounded American female climbers.
00:02:27Part of your brain knows that this is slightly illogical.
00:02:32It is dangerous.
00:02:33But life's boring if you don't have that little element of spice, right?
00:02:38We should try to get a little bit more comfortable with being afraid.
00:02:46I love exploring my perceived limit and trying to push past it.
00:03:06I love watching my family.
00:03:08I'm out of one million miles from that.
00:03:08I haven't seen it?
00:03:09I would've seen it.
00:03:17I don't know.
00:03:20I don't know.
00:03:20Yeah, I don't know.
00:03:21I do.
00:03:22I don't know where you're going.
00:03:22I'm going to have fun.
00:03:44I think this is my pee bottle.
00:03:51Nope, it's just a normal water bottle.
00:03:59A little flare in the van.
00:04:15I'm really proud of my career so far.
00:04:18But if you want to call yourself a successful all-around climber, you've got to be up on El Cap.
00:04:26There it is, in all its glory, El Capitan.
00:04:47It's always surprising how big it is.
00:04:50I never think, oh, like, it doesn't look that bad, or it doesn't look that big.
00:04:54It's always fucking so big.
00:04:58I don't know why no one talks about how scary it is.
00:05:04I wish I could not feel afraid anymore.
00:05:11El Capitan is a 3,200-foot granite face.
00:05:18It doesn't get much bigger, doesn't get much more difficult, doesn't get much more high-quality than El Cap.
00:05:28It's just the most impressive, most beautiful stone in the world, and it's so hard to free climb.
00:05:38When you look at El Cap, it looks impossible.
00:05:41It looks smooth, and you can't imagine what there would be to climb it.
00:05:44It always attracted people that are curious to push themselves to the highest level.
00:05:52For decades, climbers have been testing themselves up there.
00:05:58Climbing El Capitan is the most badass thing that you can do as a human.
00:06:04With the exception of Lynn Hill and a few other women, it's very much like a boys' club.
00:06:09Come on! Go fast! Stop!
00:06:13When I started climbing, the first person I learned about was Lynn Hill.
00:06:18She was the first to free climb a route on El Capitan called the Nose.
00:06:24And then the following year, she went back and free climbed it in a day,
00:06:29which was the most groundbreaking, astonishing achievement.
00:06:34I didn't feel like I needed to prove anything after that.
00:06:38Because I was at the age where I wanted to have a kid, I wanted to have a family,
00:06:41and having the freedom to just go rock climbing was not going to happen forever.
00:06:47At a certain point, you have to be happy with what you've done.
00:06:56What's your ring?
00:06:57You want to hear my alarm?
00:06:58Yeah. This is mine. What's yours?
00:07:01Mine's more the other end of the spectrum.
00:07:02I was in Yosemite looking for a project, some sort of inspiration.
00:07:08I was working on my personal quest to free solo El Cap on the free rider.
00:07:12And she was willing to go up the wall to support me for a day of climbing.
00:07:15I got really excited because climbing with Alex on El Cap is like playing basketball with Michael Jordan.
00:07:21It's like you're with the best of the best.
00:07:25First time I met Emily was at a cliff called Jail House.
00:07:28She was already a very established, very successful climber.
00:07:32She was a lot better than me.
00:07:34And the thing that really made an impression was that she was all kind of done up
00:07:37and she had earrings and things, and I was like,
00:07:39man, how can someone climb that hard with earrings?
00:07:42She was just so well put together and going to college
00:07:45and doing the hardest thing at the cliff.
00:07:46You know, everything about it was just different than what I was living.
00:07:49I was like, whoa, that's a different level.
00:07:53You could tell he just didn't really care about anything but climbing.
00:07:56And he is very famous for free soloing, which is rock climbing without a rope.
00:08:04No person does what he does at his level.
00:08:10I was incredibly inspired by the way he moved.
00:08:16He was so perfect.
00:08:19He seems so at ease, and I've always envied that.
00:08:23With the green ground, you can climb up to the spire and reflake the rope and manage.
00:08:28I'm just trying to nurture you into a simulclimbing machine.
00:08:35Good work.
00:08:38Good work.
00:08:39Good work.
00:08:40That was good.
00:08:41There's no way I would have done any of that without you.
00:08:44Isn't that pretty rad?
00:08:45That was pretty rad.
00:08:46That was a life experience.
00:08:47Yeah.
00:08:49I don't think you could do that in a day.
00:08:51You do?
00:08:52Yeah.
00:08:53I don't think it'd be that bad for you because you just have the base fitness that you need,
00:08:56you know?
00:08:56Yeah.
00:08:57It'd definitely be a dream.
00:08:59Yeah, it'd be sick.
00:09:00It's gotta start somewhere.
00:09:01Yeah.
00:09:03I mean, you know.
00:09:05That's when I first thought of trying to free climb LCAP in less than 24 hours.
00:09:12Climbing it in a day is the epitome of hard rock climbing.
00:09:16And there's a desire to prove myself.
00:09:18Like, I do deserve to be here.
00:09:20I do deserve to be climbing with all of these people that I've looked up to and idolized
00:09:25for a long time.
00:09:27That's pretty awesome.
00:09:28That's pretty good.
00:09:29I like a dagger, too.
00:09:31It's the sense of belonging that I want.
00:09:48I see some big wet streaks, but I also see dry rock, so it's kind of a mixed bag up
00:09:55there.
00:09:58It is not going to change a single thing.
00:10:03Most people free climb LCAP over five days or so.
00:10:06It's so much harder to free climb LCAP in a day.
00:10:11The difference between doing a multi-day ascent and doing a one-day ascent is huge.
00:10:16To climb that thing in a day, it's outrageous.
00:10:19It's an audacious undertaking.
00:10:23I'm left wondering whether she can pull it off.
00:10:28Most people who free climb LCAP in a day have done it via the free rider because it's the easiest
00:10:33route.
00:10:34I wanted to do a more challenging route, and that's why I chose Golden Gate.
00:10:41There are very few climbers who have free climbed any route on LCAP in a day other than the free
00:10:46rider.
00:10:47Golden Gate is quite a bit harder.
00:10:50Golden Gate has only been free climbed in a day by three people.
00:10:53Three of the best LCAP climbers in the world.
00:11:00These guys are heroes of mine, and I want to be a part of that group.
00:11:11Golden Gate has 34 pitches.
00:11:14My goal is to climb from the beginning of each pitch to the end without falling.
00:11:19That will be a free ascent.
00:11:21If I fall, I have to go back to the beginning of that pitch and try again.
00:11:26And I need to do this in under 24 hours.
00:11:36That's going to be really hard for her.
00:11:38I give her a 20% chance of sending, honestly.
00:11:42She just hasn't paid her dues like Honnold has.
00:11:52It's hard to put yourself out there and say you're going to try to do the hardest thing you've ever
00:11:57done.
00:11:58Just because I'm trying to protect myself from people finding out that I'm afraid or that I fail or that
00:12:04I'm just like everyone else.
00:12:08I mean, I don't want to say it's mansplaining, but primarily there's men that have accomplished this goal.
00:12:13And so it's like, I get a lot of advice.
00:12:16And it's a lot of like, oh, you need to be committed to this and you need to go here
00:12:20for this amount of time and you need to do it this way.
00:12:22And you should be doing this and you should be doing that.
00:12:24I've been climbing for 22 years.
00:12:27Like I know how to approach a goal.
00:12:31I don't need someone to tell me how to do it.
00:12:35But obviously that's a hard, that's a hard thing to convince yourself of as well.
00:12:40It's hard for me to convince myself that I know what I'm doing.
00:12:44Do you think I need more than one three?
00:12:45I wouldn't even take the three.
00:12:46Oh my God.
00:12:48Maybe I don't need this and two purples.
00:12:51I always had it in my mind ever since he asked me to support him that he would probably be
00:12:56willing to support me on Golden Gate.
00:12:59I'd like to think I may be the best supporter in the world for El Cap just because I know
00:13:04the roots really well.
00:13:04I've worked on them a long time.
00:13:06I don't think anyone has climbed any of those parts of the wall faster.
00:13:09Are you climbing the monster with just one six?
00:13:11Yeah.
00:13:12Awesome.
00:13:12And I wanted to help Emily achieve this big dream with her.
00:13:16Alex is very comfortable, very confident, but I also trust him.
00:13:20Having someone up there who you can tell is right at home makes me feel that much more comfortable.
00:13:27I'll give you that.
00:13:28Go up and try your best.
00:13:30That's all I'm doing.
00:13:30I'm just going to go try.
00:13:31Move by move, you just do your best and see how it plays out.
00:13:34I'm allowed to fall.
00:13:36Yeah.
00:13:36I mean, that's it.
00:13:37That's the beautiful.
00:13:37Then you have a rope.
00:13:38It's very good to show it.
00:13:40I'm really happy that I have a rope.
00:14:07There.
00:14:11You're going to take a little time, enjoy.
00:14:16Remember, climbing mountains is fun.
00:14:35the way that I climb the bottom 2,000 feet of the route with Alex is something called simul
00:14:40climbing so I'm leading placing gear and Alex is following climbing at the same time as me
00:14:45so we're moving up the wall together and it enables you to move a lot faster but it cuts
00:14:53some corners because you're placing less safety equipment between yourself and your partner so if
00:14:59either of us falls we can get severely injured or we could die but this is really the only way
00:15:05to climb it in a day I was kind of proud of myself honestly yeah that was good thank you
00:15:11I just hand
00:15:12every hand of the roof I was like fuck that
00:15:34that was the easiest that the monster has ever felt but it's still really hard that was way faster than
00:15:41ever before oh yeah yeah like 45 minutes
00:15:48you found 2,000 feet already you may as well climb one more picture I'm gonna try
00:15:52I don't know if I can though yeah of course you can just get in there and engage
00:15:59all right you need someone to like punch in the nuts
00:16:02ovaries
00:16:15you're doing great thank you I really appreciate it I'm really digging deep here you know this is uh
00:16:20this is my first effort yeah do you think it's worth giving it one to the death effort
00:16:25I mean I've been trying to give it to the death yeah what is that to the death it seems
00:16:29a little
00:16:29like worky if we decide to go down let's fully debrief like what are you going to do differently
00:16:35what are you going to do better where can you save energy yeah because I mean obviously there's a ton
00:16:40a lot of room for improvement today it just went from perfectly okay to perfectly not okay
00:16:59oh oh my god it hurts so bad
00:17:07hi give me a hug oh you needed a hug from you all day thank you these bruises are just
00:17:12all from one pitch
00:17:14I was secretly happy that we got rained off because everything just felt so hard
00:17:24I don't really foresee me trying again this spring I'm kind of worked over from the season
00:17:31I didn't feel ready and I haven't put in the work in order to be successful
00:17:54oh that was her first wetsuit look at how tiny that little thing is here you go here's a bunch
00:18:02of
00:18:02trophies climbing stuff first place
00:18:10junior nationals oh when she was 12 years old I don't remember what that one was
00:18:19what's that one from serious shovel oh yeah this is the world cup she won
00:18:28oh there's a little mohawk look at that mohawk
00:18:35I would say I had like a very normal childhood my dad was really into any activity that was in
00:18:44the
00:18:44mountains ski
00:18:51I had this idea that girls were inferior in some way desperately wanted to prove that I wasn't like that
00:19:05I grew up with my two cousins who were boys and we were super competitive with each other
00:19:11all I wanted to do was be better than them I wanted to do well in everything and I tried
00:19:19really hard
00:19:24when I found climbing this switch went off it was like instantly that's what I wanted to do
00:19:34the feeling of lightness and strength and invincibility was pretty profound
00:19:46I liked the feeling of success
00:19:52and if I didn't measure up to that I was so upset and disappointed
00:20:05competitions being the best winning to me that was what climbing was
00:20:15I definitely started putting more pressure on myself my self-worth was so tied to my success in
00:20:23climbing and then my success in climbing was tied to my weight the less mass you have the easier it's
00:20:32going to be to stay on the wall it just became this cycle of punishment
00:20:38I remember being completely exhausted all the time she was so thin and I didn't know what to do
00:20:48and I remember her hands were orange because all she was eating was carrots
00:20:53and I wasn't sleeping well and I was dizzy sometimes and then climbing wasn't very fun
00:21:04I feel like I barely laughed
00:21:08I started realizing that this isn't how I want to live my life and is climbing going to be a
00:21:17positive
00:21:17force in my life or is it always going to be this negative thing
00:21:24I guess now is the best time and here is the best place to say this
00:21:28I have an eating disorder I can't admit it to anybody else but at least I can admit it to
00:21:34myself
00:21:35I feel out of control when I indulge in food and my all-or-nothing behavior makes me depressed and
00:21:42unhappy
00:21:43I don't ever give myself a break I want to be perfect all the time
00:21:47I must run fast climb strong and eat as little as possible
00:22:01eventually my body and my brain just couldn't really handle all the stress and the pressures
00:22:07I realized that competing wasn't something that I really wanted to do anymore
00:22:16the pivotal thing that happened was I joined the North Face athlete team and got invited on an
00:22:25expedition to Mount Everest I had no idea what it would do for me in my life
00:22:34she was keen to try out mountain climbing
00:22:38so it's like oh first mountain climbing trip how about Everest
00:22:42a little bit crazy but why not it's the tallest and most precipitous mountain range on our planet
00:22:50if you want to test your mettle that's where you go
00:22:53I remember just saying Emily no I do not want you going to Everest
00:22:59Tim said to her you're not going and she said dad I'm not 16 and that was the end of
00:23:05that
00:23:08Emily at 25 barely coming out of the gym as a gym climber and then being on Everest
00:23:15I mean that's a huge leap to me
00:23:17I was a little like dark in those days so um I might have just totally written her off
00:23:25as a first impression you know just kind of like uh whatever
00:23:36it wasn't until I got there and realized that Conrad was like completely hands-off with Emily and
00:23:41he was like well you step in you know I'm like I don't even know her I don't want to
00:23:45do this I'm
00:23:46not a mentor I was not very helpful I definitely am not an incredibly sympathetic person
00:23:58I'm ready to go up tomorrow I'm a little nervous and scared uh to go through the ice fall
00:24:06that's knowledge happens like five times a day it's really unnerving
00:24:17I want to get through the ice fall and then I'll feel okay
00:24:28Conrad saw something in her and he was right
00:24:35she just didn't give in
00:24:48I came to care immensely for Emily over the time of that trip
00:24:54we talked about my relationship we talked about my climbing we talked about her kids and how much
00:24:58she missed her kids and just life and it gave me a peek into what my life could be like
00:25:04in the future
00:25:28she passed me and she was by herself and I was like Emily why are you by yourself where's the
00:25:32Sherpa that you were climbing with she was like oh god I feel so bad I he was slow so
00:25:37I left him
00:25:38behind was that really bad should I go back and get him
00:25:48she crushed it she crushed it it was so out of her main sport that it just
00:25:55was all the more of a huge achievement as a climber you're the sum total of all your
00:26:02ascents and expeditions and each experience that you have builds into who you are as a climber and
00:26:10Emily got that I was a lot stronger than I thought I would be climbing on Everest has made me
00:26:16appreciate
00:26:17the style of climbing that I do I do want to continue to be in the mountains and to learn
00:26:25from them
00:26:46I'm
00:26:46I
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00:27:42I just remember this charismatic guy
00:27:44he was super nice and fun to talk to
00:27:48the sad fact of high altitude climbing is there's just not many women I certainly noticed Emily
00:27:55as an anomaly but 21,000 feet is really miserable so you kind of like have a crushing headache at
00:28:02the
00:28:02same time you're trying to be like social and funny and interesting it's not like a great
00:28:06flooding opportunity
00:28:08it was this really powerful connection that we had
00:28:11I'd never felt like that with anyone before
00:28:14and we knew that we wanted to stay connected
00:28:19Adrian is gone most of the year guiding in the Himalaya
00:28:23and because I have this big project I'm working on we are going to spend the next four months apart
00:28:30I
00:28:30I don't really look forward to this time of year as it is
00:28:33because
00:28:35Adrian's gonna be gone for a really long time and
00:28:38I have a lot of like I put a lot of pressure on myself for my own projects
00:28:46I've spent a lot of time with people who have lost their partner in the mountains and
00:28:52every time he leaves I have this part of me that is afraid he won't come back
00:29:02the secret stash
00:29:05okay I'm overwhelmed again I'm gonna go eat some toast
00:29:08I'm really overwhelmed right now
00:29:10goodbye
00:29:11here we go
00:29:15it kind of sucks
00:29:19cat stuff
00:29:21I have food
00:29:23coffee stuff
00:29:24music
00:29:25music
00:29:26bed
00:29:39and she's off
00:29:44it's always hot
00:29:47this one especially
00:29:58I'm going to Moab because I want to prepare for the upcoming Yosemite season
00:30:04and Moab is a great place to do that
00:30:09it's a great place to do that
00:30:09last spring I just wasn't ready
00:30:11I hadn't put in the work
00:30:18look at these nails too
00:30:19these are the gel nail
00:30:21gel nail magic
00:30:22it's supposed to last for like three months
00:30:28I did not grow up
00:30:30learning how to crack climb
00:30:32and for climbing in Yosemite it's a required skill
00:30:46I wouldn't consider myself a super confident person when I'm standing on the ground
00:30:50it's more why I'm like climbing that my confidence shines through
00:31:04I think I did get better technique
00:31:07it's nice to feel a little more confidence
00:31:12I'm excited to go do something
00:31:13and it's nice and happy
00:31:13I don't know
00:31:15but I'm so happy
00:31:20I'm so disappointed
00:31:22I'm so happy
00:31:34I'm so happy
00:31:35I'm so happy
00:31:45I've been in Yosemite now for a few weeks training on Golden Gate.
00:31:49It's been long days hiking in and practicing the harder pitches.
00:31:54It's really the only way to know every pitch for that in a day attempt.
00:32:03There's five hard sections of the route for me.
00:32:07The first one that comes up is the monster.
00:32:10You have to kind of wedge your body into this crack.
00:32:14And this pitch is almost 200 feet long.
00:32:17The monster off with is harder if your foot can't bridge the crack.
00:32:20My foot can span between one side of the crack and the other side so I can easily wedge one
00:32:24foot and push upward.
00:32:25If you have a smaller foot, it's harder to make upward progress.
00:32:36The next pitch that's really hard for me is called the down climb.
00:32:41There's essentially no hold.
00:32:43You're kind of standing on a less than vertical, smooth surface, just pasting your feet on the
00:32:51wall and using the friction in order to stick.
00:32:54Come on.
00:32:55Your balance has to be pretty perfect in order to not get spit off.
00:33:01Oh, that was it.
00:33:05The next hard pitch is called the move.
00:33:08At the end of the pitch, there's a really hard boulder problem.
00:33:12So a series of really hard moves.
00:33:18For me, it's the most powerful section of the route.
00:33:21It has the hardest single moves.
00:33:26The next section is called the golden desert.
00:33:30It is a really long crack climb mixed with some funky traversing under a roof.
00:33:41And then the very next pitch after that is called the A5 traverse.
00:33:44And that's kind of the pitch that guards you from success.
00:33:49Imagine traversing this steep sloping rail and trying to stand on feet that are the width
00:33:56of dimes.
00:33:58The A5 traverse is the spot where most people fail.
00:34:02By the time you've climbed almost 3,000 feet to get there, your arms are just incredibly
00:34:05tired and it's really hard to hang on them.
00:34:10I'm still a little nervous about the A5 traverse.
00:34:27I'm still a little nervous about the A5 traverse.
00:34:42Thankfully, Adrian came home from Everest.
00:34:45Everything was fine, but there was weeks there where I thought he might not.
00:34:51It's not really that safe even if you make good decisions.
00:34:54Is it true?
00:34:56That I thought you might die?
00:34:57Yeah.
00:34:59I thought you might die.
00:35:00So you figured you'd stop moving on right away?
00:35:03Yeah.
00:35:04I'm just going to be a bachelorette and be just in my little world, independent.
00:35:10It could happen.
00:35:11It could be the other way around.
00:35:13Yeah.
00:35:13I think I think about it less, but I think about it sometimes as you start speed climbing
00:35:17more and more, cutting corners, rock fall.
00:35:22There's plenty of things that can kill you.
00:35:23It's a little bit of a stretch, but I'm not going to die.
00:35:26I'm not going to die rock climbing.
00:35:28But you've got to think about it and acknowledge it's a possibility.
00:35:30It's true.
00:35:31I just think that I've finally like come to a place where I'm okay.
00:35:37Not okay, but more okay.
00:35:41More okay is good.
00:35:43Yeah.
00:35:50Okay, questions.
00:35:52Okay, get married already.
00:35:53When are you getting married?
00:35:54Are you going to have babies?
00:35:55Babies.
00:35:56Get married already.
00:35:58Do you plan on having kids soon?
00:36:01Okay.
00:36:04I do plan on having kids eventually, I think.
00:36:07I want one kid, so I'm not really in like a huge rush.
00:36:12I, I say we, right?
00:36:14We, I think I've come around on that.
00:36:17We kind of settled on one because Adrian wanted like three.
00:36:20He wanted three.
00:36:22But I just want one, so I'm not in a rush.
00:36:24And I have like, we both have things we want to do first.
00:36:27I've got a couple about asking me about LCAP and what happened.
00:36:31And if I'm going back, basically I, I failed.
00:36:35And I also had terrible weather, but that's like a second part of it.
00:36:38Um, that prevented me from succeeding.
00:36:41And yes, I'm going back in the fall.
00:37:00So we've got two liters of water.
00:37:01Okay.
00:37:02I have extra shock.
00:37:04Okay.
00:37:05Cool.
00:37:06Are you taking that much extra shock?
00:37:08I'm very concerned about the heat.
00:37:10It weighs nothing.
00:37:12I guess it just, it seems like a lot of shock for, yeah.
00:37:15But we don't have to bring it.
00:37:16No, no.
00:37:17No, but I actually really want to.
00:37:18If you think it'll make you feel better, it's definitely going to bring it up.
00:37:20Okay.
00:37:21Extra shock.
00:37:21I'm bringing these.
00:37:22It's really hot.
00:37:23What are those?
00:37:25They're breakable ice packs for my hands and feet.
00:37:28Seems totally absurd.
00:37:30So if we want to climb by three, what time should we meet in the meadow?
00:37:33Well, like 2.30.
00:37:342.30.
00:37:35That's like pretty early.
00:37:37Pretty early.
00:37:37Pretty early.
00:37:57Okay.
00:37:59Okay.
00:38:06Nice job, man.
00:38:45Come on, come on.
00:38:47Come on, come on.
00:38:49Come on.
00:38:49Come on.
00:38:51Come on.
00:39:02Nice job.
00:39:08If you do it today, in this style, just like you just did it, I'd be pretty sick.
00:39:16Think about how good that's going to feel. I can't yet. I've got to finish the rest of it.
00:39:28Yeah, we started 11 and a half hours ago, so it's a good time, actually.
00:39:34This is when you rely on your World Cup fitness.
00:39:50Pretty sure you can just climb one more pitch.
00:39:54Pretty sure there's like five more pitches.
00:40:13I'm falling. No, no, you're okay. Come on. Come on.
00:40:16No, it's too much. Stay with it.
00:40:20It just fucked everything up and like...
00:40:23That's all right.
00:40:24Oh my God.
00:40:25It just like, had like shit.
00:40:31Really good. Yeah, really good.
00:40:40Ellen. Ellen.
00:40:44Come on. There you go.
00:40:47I don't have it, you guys. I don't have it.
00:40:51I'm just too tired.
00:40:54I'm giving it everything I have.
00:40:56I just...
00:40:58I just couldn't do it.
00:41:00I couldn't keep climbing.
00:41:03I'm like super bummed, but it's like everything I could possibly do.
00:41:09I failed on the last hard pitch.
00:41:13Pretty heartbroken.
00:41:28I think you have to try things that you're afraid of, that you might suck at, that you're going to
00:41:35most likely fail at in order to actually really get to know yourself and know what you're capable of.
00:41:49When I was trying to figure out how to make a team to go on this seven week, totally unknown,
00:41:57jungle bashing, crazy Alpine, Myanmar expedition, I wanted Emily to go.
00:42:04Like, I wanted her to go more than anyone, like I wouldn't go if Emily didn't go.
00:42:11This is like an anti-Everest trip.
00:42:18Think of Everest from the minute you get off the plane to the summit of Everest.
00:42:22Every step of the way is mapped out.
00:42:25The Kakabu Ratsi was exactly the opposite.
00:42:29Wanting her on the team was met with a lot of resistance, but I put my foot down and she
00:42:35was stoked to do it.
00:42:45It was a month before we even got to base camp.
00:42:49We had to cut our gear by two thirds.
00:42:53Ran out of food.
00:43:04A lot of the things that I did today, I've never done before.
00:43:22It's scary, the heavy pack.
00:43:24I feel it off that one's a little.
00:43:26Good job, Em.
00:43:31Way more rad, way more gnarly than Everest.
00:43:38My favorite day on that whole climb was Emily and I were stuck on this ridge for 48 hours.
00:43:49Winds blowing 60 miles an hour non-stop.
00:43:53And at one point Emily looks at me and she's like,
00:43:56what do you think?
00:43:57Do you think we're going to be okay?
00:43:58I looked at her and I was like, I don't, I don't know.
00:44:01I hope so.
00:44:03And she was like, all right, cool, okay.
00:44:10And five minutes later we're laughing and like doing what we can to like stay alive.
00:44:19Emily and I have talked a lot about how crazy it was and how strung out we were and how
00:44:24close to just like laying down on the trail and giving up we were and we just didn't.
00:44:31She was everything I expected her to be on that trip.
00:44:35She was gritty.
00:44:36She was funny.
00:44:37She helped me when I was low.
00:44:39She tackled massive scary things.
00:44:583.30 in the morning, November 20-something.
00:45:08I dragged everyone into helping me climb El Cap in a day.
00:45:15A massive snowstorm is approaching like tomorrow, so.
00:45:20Day after tomorrow.
00:45:21Last day of the season basically.
00:45:23Dragging everyone up here to support me one more time.
00:45:26One more character building day on the mountain.
00:45:28One more character building day on the mountain.
00:45:31It's like 4 a.m.
00:45:33It's way colder than it was last time, so that's good.
00:45:36If you were really pro, you'd be racked onto the harness already.
00:45:40Oh yeah, I didn't do that.
00:45:4510 more feet today, okay?
00:45:47Yeah, exactly, exactly.
00:45:4910 more feet today.
00:45:53Go, Em, go.
00:45:54Here we go.
00:45:55You're gonna crush it.
00:45:56Thanks, Sonny.
00:46:04Nice, Em.
00:46:07You're crashing.
00:46:09It's such a still day up on the captain.
00:46:30Creaky old grandpa.
00:46:31I'll sit down and tighten the shoes up.
00:46:36Nice, Em.
00:46:44Are you okay, Em?
00:46:45Emily, are you okay?
00:46:49Em?
00:46:50Holy shit.
00:46:52Oh my god, Em.
00:46:56Should I lower you to the ledge?
00:46:57Emily, you're okay.
00:46:59I'm okay.
00:47:02Lower.
00:47:03Em?
00:47:05Talk to us.
00:47:07Talk to us, Em.
00:47:08Are you okay?
00:47:09Are you right side up?
00:47:13She's not right side up.
00:47:15Fuck.
00:47:16Can you confirm me your number is 404-610?
00:47:18Correct.
00:47:19I'm gonna be on hold while I try to get a ranger, okay?
00:47:22Okay, thank you.
00:47:23Okay, thank you.
00:47:29You're stable now, huh?
00:47:31Hang in there, Em.
00:47:36You know, I can tell that it's terrible.
00:47:37It's all terrible.
00:47:38Like, you can tell it's a giant fall.
00:47:41The only thing I was thinking about was whether or not she'll walk again.
00:48:12You all right?
00:48:13I got a cricket.
00:48:21I've climbed this pitch so many times.
00:48:23I know it's slippery, but I've never fallen.
00:48:25I know my feet are cold, but I need to be confident.
00:48:31I wasn't scared, I just...
00:48:35Now it's scary, though, to think about.
00:48:49Oh, I'm sorry, guys.
00:49:00Yeah, I still have some stuff to learn, I guess.
00:49:07Oh, my God.
00:49:09Oh, my God.
00:49:28Oh, my God.
00:49:33world-class climber Emily Harrington trying to make history falling from Yosemite's El Capitan
00:49:38rescued by one of the most famous climbers in the world falls are apparel of the sport no matter
00:49:44your skill level thank goodness she was with people like Alex Honnold the climber at the
00:49:48center that Oscar-winning documentary free solo I was blanks I'm holding the rope but then when
00:49:53she fell so much rope fell into the system like so much rope pooled at my feet basically that
00:49:58I wound up actually grabbing the rope with my hands in an effort to catch her sooner I don't
00:50:03know if you guys had a chance to watch free solo oh he was I mean fantastic amazing what they
00:50:08do and
00:50:08boy you gotta have some nerves of steel yes you do okay a full recovery
00:50:15how are you feeling about it all shitty about it like sad yeah
00:50:24everyone is interested in El Cap and everyone is interested in the fact that I was climbing with
00:50:29Alex Honnold so they want to write a story about the damsel in distress who was rescued by the free
00:50:35solo star oh adrenaline junkies like risking their lives falling off of sheer cliffs gets rescued like
00:50:44it's just stupid and not true and it's misunderstood I had a bad fall climbing because rock climbing is
00:50:51inherently dangerous but and Alex did what exactly what any good partner would do yeah and that's the
00:50:58end of the story we were choosing to take a certain level of risk that day it was a hundred
00:51:09percent not
00:51:09it's not his fault what happened
00:51:43I was afraid of not being good enough and now the entire world thinks that as well
00:51:56she is no Alex Honnold do this without the security of a rope and then you can pretend to have
00:52:02accomplished something woman go back to kitchen please let man's doing this stuff she's too fat
00:52:28I'm bruised and have a rope burn on my neck and a pretty intense concussion
00:52:33I'm slowly recovering but mentally I'm struggling
00:52:41I just spiral into the negativity of oh I'm never gonna be able to get anywhere with this
00:52:50lots of doubt and lots of kind of like questioning of like why am I doing this why am I
00:52:54even like
00:52:55trying so hard and just feel like giving up there's just this really big fear and it's all circling
00:53:02around like the whole kid thing and the the clock is ticking idea and I really do want to have
00:53:10fun
00:53:10and enjoy climbing I do I just don't know how right now yeah it's hard to trust myself I guess
00:53:34it's passover happy passover guys hug some map john hug some map to you and uh we can tell that
00:53:41it's
00:53:41passover because we are in our houses hiding from a plague and because in a recent breakfast podcast
00:53:47very loud podcast very loud on your door will stop coronavirus we are one day short of a month
00:53:56since we've been home april 12th easter sunday and it's sunday but it doesn't really matter that it's
00:54:07sunday every day is pretty much very similar
00:54:15adrian and i have been physically together for longer than we have ever been
00:54:21it's felt like this period of deep connection
00:54:25what's your favorite color this is like a rapid fire question oh really i actually
00:54:33what's your favorite color gray gray that's a terrible favorite color my favorite color is green
00:54:44really yeah i never knew that well you learn something new every day don't you i don't think
00:54:49i've ever bought you anything green better start now
00:54:55we've discussed starting a family in more serious ways but i really have to finish this project
00:55:02before i can start thinking about taking that stuff i don't want to take eight years to free
00:55:07climb yellow cap in a day then i'll be 40 and then you know it might be too late
00:55:25if i let something like fear something like an accident stop me from doing something
00:55:32then i'll never go back i'll never try something hard again
00:55:36this is no longer just a way to prove myself it's a way for me to gain back trust and
00:55:45confidence in
00:55:46myself i need to go back
00:55:58i've been really gentle with myself just accepting that i'm probably going to be a little more conservative
00:56:04this year i think i'm going to talk to alex about adjusting my method and just be like
00:56:08dude i don't want to like go so fast i want to be able to stop and take a breather
00:56:14and i want to be
00:56:14able to place more gear and feel way more safe
00:56:34and so it begins emily's yosemite season
00:56:443 a.m i'm out of bed in coffee em's waiting for a coffee the life of a superstar
00:57:05i'm back in yosemite for the first time since the accident and adrian's been helping me train
00:57:10on the hard pitches and build back that trust
00:57:14down to the move pitch
00:57:18dun dun dun
00:57:24yes
00:57:25there was no like massive screaming whippers out of the move today
00:57:29you just hit it every time you're stronger
00:57:32big support today thank you
00:57:40physically i feel better than i have probably ever in my life
00:57:45i'm trying to figure out the best tactics for climbing the monster
00:57:50and um so i'm gonna try putting on my climbing shoe
00:57:53and then i'm gonna try putting on a size 42 tc pro
00:57:57over top of it to make my foot bigger
00:58:08i'm so excited about this
00:58:15and so what time are we thinking about starting
00:58:17let's say starting the monster at 6 a.m which means starting climbing at 1 a.m
00:58:22that's what i was hoping to do tonight you know
00:58:25i know get some you signed up for it
00:58:27yeah no no i'm into it
00:58:28yeah knee pads and duct tape and elbow pads
00:58:31at this point you're gonna get to the top more fresh than when you left the ground
00:58:35i think it'd be tough to make this more comfortable
00:58:37yeah that's the whole point
00:58:39yeah exactly
00:58:39we're ready for the the long haul right now
00:58:43i'm planning to have two partners
00:58:45it is really valuable to have alex as a partner because he is so fast
00:58:50but up higher when the climbing gets slower i really like having adrian there
00:58:55he's really good emotional support for me
00:59:05go get her go get her
00:59:07move slowly and then like see how i feel when i get to that
00:59:11yeah cool it's the same time tomorrow as today basically
00:59:14i do feel ready i don't think i'm gonna be any more ready than i am right now
00:59:19if i achieve this i'll never not be a climber but i can like move on from being like solely
00:59:26focused on climbing like i can move forward with my life i could have a family like i could
00:59:30do all these things i've wanted to do that might not require so much like pinpointed focus
00:59:37it's that meaningful
01:00:03it's that meaningful
01:00:17at some point here i'm gonna have to tie my shoes and put them on and sort of like oh
01:00:21i've got
01:00:21flashbacks of the last year
01:00:23btsd
01:00:41i'm gonna run around to the top and hopefully get to meet them like two
01:00:44thirds of the way up
01:00:48nice am really smooth
01:00:50that was am she's done for three last
01:00:56yes great job did you feel
01:01:00okay
01:01:01danger
01:01:13you heard a call from the film team that am might be starting a monster
01:01:18but should be right on track
01:01:27It's so funny that you're wearing two pairs of shoes.
01:02:04Oh, so glad to have that bitch over with.
01:02:08I'm taking off all of my shoes, all four pairs of them that I was wearing.
01:02:15I was wearing Alex's shoes over my shoes so I could climb the monster easier and faster
01:02:20and it works.
01:02:25I want to say it's not often that I encounter a completely new rock climbing technique on
01:02:29a big wall.
01:02:30This is one of those times you've styled the hard stuff.
01:02:34Next M is going to lead us to the summit of the mighty El Capitan.
01:02:38That's what's happening next.
01:02:51Good.
01:02:52Really nice.
01:03:02Nice and relaxed.
01:03:09Just the feet.
01:03:12Perfect.
01:03:13Perfect.
01:03:14That's the one.
01:03:15Perfect.
01:03:17Really good.
01:03:23Good on.
01:03:31I'm not coming down off the mountain until I set this route.
01:03:36I'm never climbing that pitch again.
01:03:42Nice, Sam.
01:03:43Really smooth.
01:03:50I gotta say, you look really fit right now.
01:03:53Like, your arms are muscular.
01:03:58Thanks, Alex.
01:04:00Have you been working out more?
01:04:04Yeah, I've been putting some effort in.
01:04:07Like, have you really?
01:04:08Because you look like freaking kind of jacks.
01:04:11Yeah, dude, I have.
01:04:15Nice.
01:04:19Really good, come on, so strong.
01:04:37That's it, come on.
01:04:39Really good.
01:04:53I had to dig really deep for that one.
01:04:57I set the move pitch on my first try.
01:05:00Everything's going well.
01:05:03I'm waiting for the other shoe to drop.
01:05:22I'm waiting for the other shoe to drop.
01:05:32I'm waiting for the other shoe to drop.
01:05:32I'm waiting for the other shoe to drop.
01:05:35Yeah.
01:05:36It feels good.
01:05:37It was infinitely better than last time.
01:06:06You got it, man.
01:06:15No!
01:06:16No!
01:06:19Oh no.
01:06:24It's bleeding.
01:06:25Yeah, I see. Just a little.
01:06:28Want me to bring you down?
01:06:29Yeah.
01:06:30Okay. A little.
01:06:32You're okay.
01:06:42Let's see how bad it is.
01:06:51Like, I just don't know anymore about this whole hole. It just feels too hard for me.
01:07:00This stupid shit just keeps happening.
01:07:03No.
01:07:04You're getting better and better every time.
01:07:06I know.
01:07:07I just don't feel good enough right now.
01:07:18I wanted it so badly and maybe I just wanted it too much.
01:07:30This worked really hard.
01:07:32No.
01:07:33You're not done, Em.
01:07:36You're not done.
01:07:40So stupid. Why did that have to happen?
01:07:43I didn't do anything wrong. I wasn't running it out. I wasn't doing anything wrong.
01:07:49I'm just scared now.
01:07:51You just bumped your head.
01:07:53You're fine.
01:07:55You didn't break anything.
01:07:57I know.
01:08:00I hope they all do it.
01:08:02You're gonna do it today.
01:08:06You're gonna do it today.
01:08:10It's not hopeless.
01:08:12Promise.
01:08:13Okay.
01:08:14I'm trying.
01:08:15I keep trying.
01:08:16I don't have, like, much confidence anymore.
01:08:20I think you've got more try on you.
01:08:23You know I'd tell you if I didn't.
01:08:25I don't.
01:08:26I don't.
01:08:26I think you can do it.
01:08:28You can try.
01:08:48You don't need to stop.
01:08:49Seriously, that's over here.
01:08:50I'm sorry, Cindy.
01:08:54And you're trying to scratch this in my head.
01:08:55Let me ask you something for a while.
01:09:24Super good.
01:09:26You look super good, come on.
01:09:29Yeah.
01:09:29Oh, no map for it.
01:10:37Thanks, no matter what happens, I'm proud of myself, I'm really proud of myself.
01:10:44Look at the sunset.
01:10:54Gotta keep climbing.
01:10:57Trying to rest before the last hard pitch.
01:11:00The A5.
01:11:01Yeah.
01:11:02The sight of...
01:11:05Last time's failure, last year's failure.
01:11:07Mm-hmm.
01:11:08Yeah.
01:11:09Pretty nervous for it.
01:11:12And we're out of water.
01:11:14Yeah, we are out of water. It sucks.
01:11:15Poor mountain guide planning.
01:11:22You look great. So proud of you.
01:11:24Have fun on this. This is the pitch you earn.
01:11:35Come on.
01:11:41Come on.
01:11:45Come on.
01:12:01Come on.
01:12:04Come on.
01:12:11Come on.
01:12:13Come on.
01:12:16Come on.
01:12:18Come on.
01:12:22Come on.
01:12:23Come on.
01:12:25Come on.
01:12:27You know what to do.
01:12:46Come on.
01:12:52Come on.
01:12:55Come on.
01:12:59Come on.
01:13:04No!
01:13:05Come on.
01:13:06Come on.
01:13:09Holy shit.
01:13:11Evelyn.
01:13:18Oh my god.
01:13:23Holy shit.
01:13:25Holy shit, Evelyn.
01:13:34I can't believe I did that.
01:13:36Okay, I've got to keep it together.
01:13:38We've got five more pitches.
01:13:41Oh my god.
01:13:43Dude, I'm falling so bad.
01:13:47I've always dreamed of being able to do this.
01:13:49And now it's happening,
01:13:51and it's just crazy how it's happening.
01:13:54It was so close so many times to falling just now.
01:13:57So close.
01:13:59But I just didn't fucking let go.
01:14:38Oh my god.
01:14:41Fuck you!
01:14:42No!
01:15:02I'm really, really happy and exhausted.
01:15:05My head kinda hurts and I'm thirsty
01:15:09and everything is perfect.
01:15:16I love you so much.
01:15:19I love you so much.
01:15:22You did.
01:15:27I'm so proud of you.
01:15:28You worked so hard.
01:15:32I did.
01:15:34And you believed.
01:15:35Yeah.
01:15:392112, 2113.
01:16:05You earned that.
01:16:08Mm-hmm.
01:16:09Yeah.
01:16:30I can say hi to everyone.
01:16:31Nice work.
01:16:32Thanks.
01:16:33Well done.
01:16:34You look worse.
01:16:37Actually, you look pretty good.
01:16:38He's went downhill a little bit after he left.
01:16:41You have to make it after it, dude.
01:16:43Why'd you leave us?
01:16:45Oh, my God.
01:16:46That is so funny.
01:16:50Dude.
01:16:51Come around.
01:16:52Oh, my God.
01:16:55That is so funny.
01:17:04Oh, my God.
01:17:12Oh, my God.
01:17:14Oh, my God.
01:17:19Oh, my God.
01:17:43I can still hear her voice in my head.
01:17:49and I think about whenever something's hard
01:17:54or something comes up that feels tricky
01:17:57or feels complicated,
01:17:59especially as like a woman and a mother,
01:18:03I try to think about how Hillary would handle it.
01:18:19Climbing is dangerous and it entails a level of risk,
01:18:22but climbing has given me so much
01:18:25and I'm just not willing to give it up.
01:18:33I'm excited for what's next.
01:18:36Bye bye, bye.
01:18:41Oh.
01:18:57I know the rise and I know the fall
01:19:01Cause the voice inside knows me best of all
01:19:09If I can't run, I'll walk or crawl
01:19:14I'll restart, restart
01:19:18I'll give my all
01:19:22To find my place
01:19:26My place on the wall
01:19:44I'll follow the path into the sky
01:19:48To kiss the heavens before I die
01:19:58Amidst the clouds
01:20:00Amidst the clouds
01:20:01The world seems small
01:20:03His tired heart
01:20:07Still wants it all
01:20:10I'll find my place
01:20:14My place on the wall
01:20:23It's been through the fight
01:20:26I've been through the fall
01:20:29I've been through the fall
01:20:30Giving my all
01:20:33Giving my all
01:20:34For my place on the wall
01:20:38I've been through the find
01:20:39I've been through the fall
01:20:44Oh
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