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  • 3 weeks ago
The 2 Johnnies Late Night Lock In Season 3 Episode 7
Transcript
00:00Oh, it's back in town, oh, it's a bad guy.
00:06I said, oh, it's a bad guy, oh, it's a bad guy.
00:10Oh, it's a bad guy.
00:11Oh, it's a bad guy.
00:25Woo!
00:26Hello and welcome to the best of the two Johnnies late night blocking!
00:40Now there were so many great moments from the last series, who can forget Margot Robbie giving Johnny B a piggyback?
00:45Ah, the time we bet Ronaldo on headers and bollies!
00:47Yeah, Taylor Swift and Sabrina Carpenter, remember they did that acoustic version of the guy to scam the rat?
00:52That's right!
00:53But it tells you just how good tonight's show is, cause none of them made the highlight real!
01:00Alright, let's take a look at what did make the cut. Roll that 10!
01:07Now, it's time to find out who's in the bar!
01:10We're in the bar!
01:12Who's in the bar?
01:13We're in the bar!
01:15I don't know how I learned how to do this, but I can balance things on my nose and my face.
01:19I can balance pretty much, pretty much anything I think.
01:22On your face!
01:23Yeah!
01:24That's your base!
01:25Now, now!
01:26It's time to beat me to see you!
01:27Oh!
01:28Oh!
01:29Oh!
01:30How are you?
01:31To the three!
01:321, 2, 3!
01:331, 2, 3!
01:35I put one ear in first, and then another one, but this is where the real trick happens.
01:56That's amazing!
02:02P-Po-D-Clap, I've got to keep on dancing at the peep-po-d-clap.
02:09I've got to keep on dancing down and last only once.
02:14I've got to keep on dancing at the peep-po-d-clap.
02:18Peep-po-d-clap.
02:20Yeah!
02:25Oh, Jesus, lads.
02:27What do you say to that?
02:29Can you do that? I don't want to put you on the spot.
02:31What do you reckon, lads?
02:34All right, here we go.
02:35What am I bloody down here?
02:38Yeah!
02:39Yeah!
02:41Yeah!
02:42CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
02:44CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
02:47Oh!
02:49CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
02:51CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
02:53CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
02:55I used to...
03:04See, sir!
03:08LAUGHTER
03:09I can count people.
03:12Give it up!
03:13You yourself almost had a career as a pop star.
03:34I did audition for a boy band for Louis Walsh.
03:37How did it go?
03:38Yeah, not great.
03:40It was in the pod in Dublin.
03:42Remember the pod?
03:43Yeah, yeah.
03:44They called my name up and I'm starting to sing
03:46I can show you the world from Aladdin.
03:48Good song choice!
03:50What song choice?
03:51What?
03:52I don't know.
03:53And do you know what?
03:54I started to, boy.
03:55I was like...
03:56I started and went, I'm in trouble.
03:59LAUGHTER
04:00So afterwards, anyway, Louis kept going to me.
04:01He wanted to get you.
04:02I'm going to put you in a band.
04:03I'm going to put you in a band.
04:04I was like, yeah, yeah, yeah, okay, cool.
04:05I'm getting all brilliant.
04:06After that audition, he took me outside and he says,
04:08maybe not this band, but I'm definitely going to work with you in something.
04:10I was like, alright, brilliant.
04:11Ah, thank God!
04:12We really messed up, I was like, yeah.
04:13No, we get you in something...
04:14He's like, brilliant.
04:15We want to be in something.
04:16Brilliant.
04:17He's like...
04:18I really want to do something with you.
04:19I was like, brilliant.
04:20He said, no, we have to get something done with them ears.
04:27What?
04:28We have to get something done with them ears?
04:29For ears?
04:30Yeah, and I was like...
04:31he's like, I'm one of you is 16.
04:33I'm like, yeah, OK.
04:34Yeah, yeah, sure.
04:35So I went home and I was saying to my ma saying,
04:38they said I have to get something done with me ears.
04:39I was thinking my mum would say, like, cheeky bastard.
04:42Yeah, yeah.
04:43And then my mum turned around and said,
04:44do you want to get something done with them?
04:47I was like, what the fuck is wrong with me ears?
04:50Last week in York, there was a man playing with himself
04:52up in the stalls of the show.
04:55I know, I was thrilled.
04:56Yeah.
04:59I was absolutely delighted.
05:01I was like, shut up.
05:04Was he hot? Was he wearing a ring?
05:05What was the crack?
05:06Because that just never happened.
05:08But he was, like, having a...
05:09Now, I was fed...
05:11I didn't know how...
05:12He was having a little go of himself, I'd say.
05:14What happened?
05:15He wasn't having a full...
05:16Right.
05:17You know what I mean?
05:18He wasn't full of pepper shit.
05:19No, it was like...
05:22Yeah.
05:23It was a little sprinkling.
05:25Would you say a little sprinkling of sorts?
05:27A fondle?
05:28A fondle.
05:29It's like he was playing three blind mice on himself.
05:32Because then, I didn't know...
05:33Well, anyway, I saw the footage of it
05:35and it was quite innocent in the end.
05:36Okay.
05:37It wasn't the compliment I thought it was.
05:38Right.
05:39Yeah.
05:40But when he was removed, you just went.
05:41And I was like, that's not that hot.
05:42You should have fought for me.
05:43Do you know what I mean?
05:46I want to stay and finish.
05:47She's still hot.
05:48I just left.
05:49So that's the closest thing I've had.
05:51What kind of commitment is that?
05:52I think I'm seeing him now.
05:54I think we're going to date.
05:55True or false.
05:56Were you the only boy in an all-girls school?
05:59True, yeah.
06:00True, yeah.
06:01True.
06:02Why?
06:03I don't know.
06:05I didn't make up the rules.
06:06Not with me, folks.
06:08I think they just left it so long to put me into a school
06:11that there was no...
06:12In our local area, there was no places left, right?
06:15Yeah.
06:16You have to just get...
06:17You have to go to school.
06:18It's law.
06:19Yeah.
06:20And eventually, the only school that would take me
06:21was the girls' school.
06:22So I went in.
06:23So I spent the first seven years of my school
06:25with all girls.
06:27In my class and everything.
06:28We have a picture of you here.
06:29Yeah.
06:40Very over-dressed for a Monday.
06:41Yeah, yeah.
06:42That was just what I wore to school.
06:44I looked like a little cult leader in that time.
06:47It's like all these little miniature wives
06:49that this little cult leader has.
06:52Looking back on it, I was like,
06:53no-one's going to want to touch me.
06:55Well, I was wrong.
06:56I didn't know it blew up.
06:57And then I tweet Putin
06:59and it was the worst thing ever.
07:02You tweeted who?
07:03Putin?
07:04Vladimir Putin?
07:05I tweeted...
07:06What did you say to him?
07:08I just said,
07:09Hey, bro.
07:10How much did you pay them?
07:11He's here tonight, Mick.
07:14He's here tonight, Mick.
07:19And that lad.
07:24Scourious...
07:25The time of the...
07:26for about a year or two after that,
07:28anything about some versions,
07:29I shit myself,
07:30I was like, someone's just going to stick a pen on me or something.
07:32And I'll have say now, Poisman.
07:34What is your record in the long jump?
07:366.32.
07:376 metres.
07:390.32.
07:40Right, well, the reason we're asking that
07:42is because earlier,
07:43myself and Smacks gave it a go.
07:47We didn't know what was a good length,
07:48what was a bad length.
07:50We've got a video here of Johnny trying to...
07:52Do you want to see it?
07:53Yeah.
07:54Here we go.
07:59No, I just want to say,
08:00I am carrying a quad injury.
08:02The grind's a bit tight.
08:03I didn't have the right runners,
08:07several things.
08:08Right, okay.
08:09Would you do the honours?
08:10Can we stand up?
08:11Yeah, here you go.
08:12You can reveal that...
08:13Where you are there?
08:14Smacks got 1.7.
08:16I'll take that.
08:17Pretty good.
08:18It looks better measured out than it does on the video.
08:27Let's have a look and see how Johnny B got on.
08:30He was cheating, he had really good runners on.
08:35What did you get, John?
08:37I did slightly better, I got 2.2.
08:40What did you see you got again?
08:426.32.
08:436.32, okay.
08:44We're just going to explain that to people.
08:46If we can.
08:47You jumped.
08:48There's 4.
08:49There's 5 metres.
08:506.32 here.
08:51Well, I have 2 dogs.
08:52I had 2 dogs.
08:53I've had a 3-legged lurcher called Lola for years.
09:09And then we fostered Mick, who has 4 legs.
09:12And there they are there, yeah.
09:14I don't know.
09:15I don't know what they're doing.
09:17I don't know what they're doing.
09:21Lola looks happy.
09:26They're not happy.
09:27They're not happy.
09:28It looks like Lola's going, you've got to earn your place in this house mate.
09:33We know at the same time that say all ye jockeys, you're all in the same way room.
09:37You're all kind of togging out together for want of a better room.
09:39We're literally beside each other.
09:40Can I get spicy in there?
09:41Can I be?
09:42Do you know what I mean?
09:43I'll be honest.
09:44If some lad cut me off now in a corner, he'd be, you know.
09:47Yeah, there's kind of a code.
09:48Right.
09:49It can get spicy.
09:50There'd be a couple of, but really like we're small little lads.
09:53It's kind of a Mormon.
09:54Don't do that again.
09:55Why is Samba so hard?
09:56Because it's all about like bouncing and moving your hips and your body.
10:00So.
10:01Is there any music in this place?
10:02Yeah.
10:03Can we get a bit of Samba music?
10:04Oh.
10:05There we go.
10:06There we go.
10:07Can you explain how it's going?
10:26That's actually, wherever put that song on, that's very fast.
10:35fast. We don't normally go that quick, but they're bacchicadas that you would do to
10:40that. I knew it was a bacchicada. Classic bacchicada. So you close your feet. Right, close your feet, lads, I hope you all do with us. Come on, we all do with us. Let's, and girls, come on. You take a step back, here we go, lads. Right, okay, listen, here we go. So we close our feet and we're going to go back on our right and then left. So it's literally just back, back and stay up on your toes, wiggling your hips. So we literally go, bump, bump, bump, bump, right? Not bad. And then we'll just shake.
11:05Are you ready for music? Hang on, hang on, hang on. But do you reckon we want people to learn to dance? Oh, you're doing it behind the bar. We want people to learn to dance. Yeah. But there probably won't be too much samba music on in the pub in
11:17February. Yeah. Okay. So can we do this to a song that you might hear in a pub in Ireland? Oh, we can make it work. Okay, right, lads.
11:23Wah, wah. Okay, well, seeing as you are the only real pro presenter, let's go,
11:53here you do live television all the time would you read the autocue and throw it to the link for
11:57us i would love to where am i going down here you see this screen is on top here here we go
12:00okay we have got a camera on the streets of waterford where everyone tell you absolute
12:04we have got a camera on the streets of waterford where everyone smells of cabbage and i'd never
12:28go there because they're all sod busting blighting bog monsters and limerick to know what it is
12:33it's way better also i love the two audience let's have another game of irish or aussie let's head
12:50back to coogee beach in sydney oh it feels like home in a way doesn't it right so just by looking at
12:58somebody who's this man this lad looks so scared get in on him get in on him oh he's got budgie okay
13:10don't say anton man you're live on television nod your head if you're up for playing a game
13:15i think he's got a big irish head in him but he's australian from the neck down
13:18yeah if that's at all possible i agree with you the pants aren't they they're not no irish man
13:26to wear those pants but he does have an irish head i'm confused audience what do you reckon irish
13:32or aussie okay what's your name mate and where are you from john from ireland
13:38we've got a game that we're calling we aren't family yeah so we've got a camera out in the streets
13:46of galway where all the members of the of a family are dancing to the same tune but here's the catch
13:50one person isn't in the family your job is to spot the imposter okay okay all right let's go live to
13:57galway okay here we go lads we've got the de santas family i know already from one to six straight
14:07away roddy you're looking at them who do you think is not in the family
14:12the family yeah they're all they're all a family bar one that fella number two he looks a bit
14:17wrong andrew what do you reckon number three because he looks too happy no family's that happy
14:27yeah okay karen what do you reckon oh now you're going close it's hard yeah no so that's so they
14:32look the image yeah that fella on the end looks like he's just being plumped there yeah it could be
14:38him right they say the rhythm is in the genes so let's uh find out we'll get them dancing let's see
14:44let's see is this live yeah this is live and going yeah okay right hit the music
14:54oh i'm taking number four
14:58who do you reckon oh it's amazing number four is dancing with his tongue
15:07who found the family oh that's so hard i tell you i think i think number three is american
15:12number three looks a bit yeah he looks a bit foreign okay but so does number one that girl looks
15:18too jolly compared to the rest of them okay who's not in the family
15:24what do you call it what number four are you reckon
15:25rodney rick is four i'll tell you what say it not because we'll find out after the break
15:42we've seen the santos family on the streets of galway but one person wasn't actually part of the family john
15:48yes let's go back to galway and see lads right looking at the screens who do we think
16:08is not part of the family that's what you reckon what number
16:13what are we saying okay okay moment of truth moment of truth we think it's number four
16:18some people are saying number six would the real imposter please step forward
16:22okay number four what's your name and how do you know the family or have you ever met them before
16:35my name is kian and i have no idea who these people are put your hands together and a big thank you to
16:41everybody on the street we're raising children not to play outside because it's too dangerous
17:02don't let them play outside why what in case they discover exploration independence problem solving
17:07resilience and essential adult skills and ironically leaving them indoors with the ipad where the
17:13paedophiles actually live by the way on the internet so we find ourselves in an environment
17:22i learned this recently ireland has a navy
17:26we've seven boats lads oh the dictators of the world are shitting themselves now aren't they huh
17:36we have seven ships seven vessels and their job is to go around the island
17:42to go around the island now i don't know if they go up the north right
17:47i haven't googled it yet right so they go three quarters around the island right
17:52or update i'm a cross community comedian pick your side lads right and their job and i didn't know
17:58this when i go to bed at night on my lovely warm pillow there's men and women out there on the water
18:06away from their own families four or five weeks at a time protecting our country they're away from
18:11their own families riding each other oh they're all at it just like the guards and the teachers
18:26oh they love oh they love it out in the atlantic ocean they love it like
18:33and they're away from they're away from away from their own families protecting our country
18:37and i'm at home and these people will never let us down if we ever get invaded but only in ireland
18:43would this happen that one day on the news the government announced to the rest of the world
18:48that five of the ships were broken
18:52what sort of a country announces to the rest of the world that their first line of defense
18:59is broken keep your mouth shut lads tell him you have a hundred boats and say nothing right
19:07i know the uk have a policy to stop the boats in ireland we can't even fecking start ours like
19:12you know
19:18this is the weirdest rt show i have ever done ladies and gentlemen and i just recently did high road
19:25low road for rt1 anybody see it yeah if anybody see okay you flick a coin two percent just flick a
19:29coin one person gets the high road the high end five star experience the other person gets the low
19:33road uh the shite experience high road low road colin murphy and i went to poland colin murphy got
19:38front row tickets to a cold play concert backstage passes and a chance to chat to chris martin one-on-one
19:45for 25 minutes and i got the high road stay at home didn't shot the cold play i am single at the
19:58minute um oh yes meet me at the bar afterwards uh but i think i think i know why i'm single now i think
20:05i figured it out i think it's because i like to think i can change a man yes the girls over here as
20:11well we love a little bit of a project don't we you know the way some men like to fix cars well i like
20:18to fix men i'll look for something on the verge of breaking down and i'll be like come here to me
20:25and then i'll spend two years under that thing making sure it's road worthy
20:30don't worry guys as a comedian you're in safe hands with me i'm very woke unbelievable unbelievable
20:36like even when it comes to the old lgbqta i've got a best friend for every letter i do i've got a best
20:43friend for like lesbian that's my friend jyvonne like g that's my friend brian like t-trans that's
20:49my friend jyvonne again she's great she covers a load of letters from me actually
20:55because she's on the real that one she's great
20:58she doesn't cover asexual at the end people who don't want to have sex but my wife sorts that one out so
21:02it's fine
21:10you learn a lot when you become a dad the breastfeeding and all that i remember the very
21:14first time ever experiencing it i was there with my wife she was trying to feed the baby it wasn't
21:18really working i didn't realize i thought it just would work all the time you know and god bless the
21:22nurses a nurse came into the room and grabbed my wife's breast and my son's head with the elegance of
21:28a builder you know like picking an extension lead out of a puddle i'll get it to work don't worry
21:36and now i kind of thrive on the awkwardness you know i love it like my my uh my wife's dad was
21:42coming to visit when we had the baby and um i could see by the walk on the man when he walked into the
21:47living room that he was going to go for a kiss with the baby and i also knew his daughter was feeding the
21:53baby so i could have stopped him
22:02but i was bored out of my mind you know i said ah this would be good and fair play to him he must
22:08have known when he got to there but he kept going all the way down it was so awkward and then he tried
22:13to make a joke about it which is something i wouldn't recommend to be quite honest with you
22:17because the joke he went for that evening right was uh leave some for me you greedy little
22:22shit we haven't seen him since you know he doesn't am i the only that can see the obvious link
22:32between the decline of drinking alcohol and the rise of celibacy it's obvious um
22:40siobhan and no i don't know how long you've been together 24 years right we don't even need to
22:46check right unless you're muslim or a recovering addict no you were off your tits the first time
22:51you got it on with siobhan there is no there is no there is no other way there is no there is no
23:00oh sorry guaranteed well well we know well now now that's guaranteed then i know we don't even
23:17need to check no do not confirm i know for a fact you wouldn't even be here tonight you never would
23:23were it not for alcohol you would not have been created there'd be an empty space there'd be no
23:28rose no i would have had to get to the point where i go i could see two of you can i smash one of you
23:33it would have been something like that wouldn't it it's going on thank you that's it put your chips
23:39on my back now well that's it that's it i can feel the vinegar on my chinese tattoo
23:47thank you very much good evening
23:49ladies and gentlemen it's time for one of the greatest quizzes of all time it's the parish quiz
24:07i also heard your lifeguard your qualified lifeguard yeah technically yeah but i can't swim
24:21right so you're a lifeguard you can't swim you're aware of what lifeguards do yeah
24:26how how did you qualify um i did a class in school with about 20 other people and i was the only one
24:32that failed and they felt bad so they passed me in two minutes i'll tell you one thing dean if i'm
24:38ever in the river lad please please just offer me a soup instead or something uh what are you up to
24:42yourself oh doing a bit of milking doing a bit of nursing a bit of milking a bit of nursing a bit of
24:47nursing a bit of milking yeah the two ends of it you know are you a nurse trying i'm in my
24:55i only dropped out once and i didn't drop out this past two years so i'm doing well now should
25:01get on to dean's teacher he'll definitely pass it and who are you looking or who are you looking for
25:08who are you looking for
25:12pat callan he's a fellow up the road for me so right milking there nearly five years so
25:18now we heard uh you had an interest in the old rose trillie yourself what's this what's going on
25:24i know we look so we're only about 40 minutes odd from trillie at home so we go back every year so
25:29i recognized a few of the faces when i came in this evening and i know we love it yeah and how do you
25:33think caitlin is doing oh she's fab caitlin's a dote yeah such a good guy great answer rose trillie answer
25:38oh 100 i feel like that you're already do you have a favorite animal i do um snoopy the cow
25:51snoopy the cow now is snoopy the cow just your favorite or is it a pet or what oh it's a pet
25:55yeah no uh she as as a calf and a heifer she used to snoop into our pockets right see what she could
26:02find usually sweets or something you know something good so that's why she got the name
26:08snoopy the way i left your retirement there's a lot of money in there there's none of that johnny
26:14and representing us is jake kiney holy jake too bad no well jake how are we getting on man right
26:22how's your act fair a long way up
26:27we're up here every week man come on yeah you could stay at home we'd see each other as well
26:33kicking off with john in rossnery here's your question
26:36hi johnny congratulations on becoming the third johnny just to ask you who was the captain of the
26:42saint mary's adult team that won the junior b championship and here's his mother
26:48the man asking the question is then right there and then the water is there
27:04you obviously recognize that woman yeah i do yeah who is it who is it it's mommy
27:13the woman in the video is your mother yeah okay so the answer to the question is
27:17uh my brother james lynch
27:24and the answer is james lynch
27:26yes
27:31munter connacht we're back to you let's have your next question
27:36well amy connor here i'm with the two fergals you're with the two johnnies
27:40muncheponic last won the junior championship in 1976 against spania our question for you today is
27:47whose cows are those
27:51whose cows are they out the back of the ga field right it is
27:55own brodie's cows own brodie's cows yes right well let's find out if you're right
28:00and the answer is the brodie's
28:02we're starting with nerdy here we go here's your question hi pike jillian here from the shop can you
28:13tell us which local farmer sells us these potatoes no tie that's jillian from the shop no need for
28:22first names the shop i like how i like how you're all in nerdy too much hardship to name the shop
28:29it's just a shop uh who produces them spuds uh john burn john burn okay all right john burn you say
28:39let's find out if you're right and the answer is the burns
28:43okay let's go back to khalidi for your next question hi ashley margaret and mike here we're
29:01here in the shop in rahina and margaret has a question for you ashling what year did my mother
29:06opened the shop oh like i think it's the 50s i'm between 53 or 54. go on give it a go 54. 1954.
29:28okay let's go back to dexter's laboratory and find out
29:32and the answer is 1953
29:45shake you ready just to go up now let's go to the premier county for our next question
29:50hi jake andy here with firma cool's two hounds but last thursday evening this hound here peppy
30:01had a big birthday party in palmuka your father was there with many others he had a cheesecake
30:06the lads had sponge cake the lads had sponge cake but what age was pepe
30:13okay the question is the question is what age was pepe the dog last week
30:19i didn't even get to collect the feather that dog's fair old
30:2816 that's a fair age let's go back to andy and find out if you're right
30:34hi jake i hope you got it right or you'll be in trouble the next evening
30:37but mr peppy celebrated his 16th birthday
30:40it's a draw lads which means we need a tiebreaker right can we get davy russell to give us a hand
30:50with this tiebreaker davy russell
30:54jump in here this this is a tough quiz
30:58well you see you're not from those parishes
31:031953 and 1954
31:06okay lads so our question is
31:08davy russell champion jockey all his life had to be on top of his weight in order to race our
31:14question is now he's retired what weight is he
31:21tiger nerney to the nearest kg what weight would you say davy he's laying the mutton down
31:28what's your neck his hind quarters are
31:32have a good have a good look at now what would you put on him tig
31:38eh
31:39eh
31:41shhh
31:4188 kg
31:4388 kg
31:45what's that in all money you don't know i don't know what that is in all money yeah 88 kg
31:50ashley
31:51oh it's pure sat in the deck i'd say 85 kg
31:55okay she's meant for a little the less one 85 well here's the moment the truth davy jump on
31:59oh we're back in the way room oh i mean like with or without clothes
32:05we'll be back after the break
32:07we'll live on the clothes
32:09i'll just hop up on it she'll walk away
32:10i'll see yeah okay including the boots
32:1688 kg which means tiger's the winner
32:27now here is the moment of truth okay in one of these envelopes is an all expenses paid trip to las
32:35vegas
32:38now also in there okay is a bag of spuds from the shop
32:46which envelope are you going to take ty what's it going to be in one of them is the trip to vegas and
32:50the other is the bag of spuds we're going with this one you're going with that one closest
32:53yeah okay tiger open her up and let us know dead right bless yourself i've been fingers crossed
32:59hold the rest of the camera what have you got what's it going to be a bag of spuds
33:02free from desire
33:14mine and senses purify
33:16free from desire
33:18mine and senses purify
33:20free from desire
33:22mine and senses purify
33:24free from desire
33:42now ladies and gentlemen you may not know this um we don't like to bring it up too often but
33:47tip one the all-ireland
33:51take that carlo
33:54and tonight in the bar is a very important guest
33:58can i make my way down please if you don't mind ladies and gentlemen
34:01sorry how are you you're not our guest but thank you
34:04not you and the kenny jerseyina lads because if you don't mind right here behind you all all evening
34:09has been
34:10deline mccartor
34:17now
34:19tipper area we're lucky enough to win it this year but only 10 counties have ever won the hurling
34:24all-ireland championship and had the chance to climb those hallowed steps and make the famous speech
34:29so we thought we'd let some counties who have never won the all-ireland
34:35some people here in the audience might like to lift it
34:38like i see a whole mix of jerseys uh where are you guys from
34:41i'm baltimore america baltimore have never won it
34:46right is say for example is there anyone here from tyron
34:49yeah okay let's go have a chance this this this should go well i think
34:59okay who's from tyron
35:02tyron have never won the lee mccarty have they that's right i know well would you like the
35:06chance now to lift the cup and make a speech jeez i'd love it okay are you ready so in your own time ready
35:11who would you like to thank jeez i'd like to thank my whole family and
35:21all the good people at trillican especially my uncle rodney kelly a big inspiration
35:28no this is this is unbelievable never thought i'd left this thing in my life
35:33thanks very much
35:34give it up to ron everybody
35:36yay back to you johnny smacks thank you john now as johnny b said only 10 counties have won
35:45the lee mccarty cup one of those counties have won it since 1998
35:51i am of course talking about awfully uh neil do you remember the summer of 1998. shut your face
35:58yes it was brilliant absolutely brilliant first team to be knocked out and still win it when
36:01got in the back door the way all awfully people like to do it that sounded weird
36:10i'm from rosgrace all right on the border yeah occupied awfully yeah yeah so you know i'm i'm
36:16always kind of giving awfully a ribbon but i think it's it's time that you know we get the
36:19lee mccarty over give it to an awfully man oh yes i think it's only fair lans would you like to see neil
36:23delamere lift the lee mccarty cup
36:29i don't know if i can do this john there's a good chance there's a good chance i may not be able to
36:38show me face around ross grave for a while but neil delamere you've surely practiced this in the
36:42mirror as the young fella no i knew i was so shy i didn't get anyone here i'd like to thank my uncle
36:47uh rodney kelly and he's he moved down from tyrone and this is why we won can i do the speech i would
36:55make oh lads it's listen it's customary in this position we want to say hip hip array to the losing
37:01team but it was kilkenny and you can't beat those by enough so
37:12it's a lovely color till it gets the second dip that's the way with the owlands courtin you'll
37:27never know when he'll take a fit madam i'm a darling a diro dither oh oh madam i'm a darling a diro
37:34day oh madam i have gold and silver madam i have tracks of land madam i have ships in the ocean
37:41all i'm missing is a fine young man madam i'm a darling a diro dither oh oh madam i'm a darling a diro day
37:49oh going to the well for water washing it around for to make some tea he fell over i fell under all of
37:56the game was above today madam i'm a darling a diro dither oh oh madam i'm a darling a diro day oh madam
38:04you can tie my garter tie it up above my knee if you want you can tie it further madam i'm a darling
38:11a diro day oh madam i'm a darling a diro day oh madam i'm a darling a diro day oh madam i'm a darling
38:18a diro day oh madam i'm a darling a diro day oh madam i'm a darling a diro day oh
38:24So you can match the personality of an animal to what kind of person they should be with.
38:34It's not die or relate again with animals is it?
38:36It kind of is.
38:38We're back to leash.
38:40There's two Jack Russells.
38:42We're wondering if you could describe, we've got an animal here for you.
38:46Yeah, this is Gujon who is a five-year-old golden retriever.
38:50I mean, what kind of person owns a Gujon?
38:53Well, the person who should own a golden retriever is someone that likes to walk and someone who's active.
38:58Because a lot of dogs are rehomed because people get a cockapoo and they live in a fucking flat in Dublin or something.
39:03So I would think a quite active person that likes walking.
39:06Yeah, we've got another dog for you here.
39:08Yeah.
39:09This is Ted Hastings, who's a four-year-old golden doodle.
39:12Yeah.
39:13You know, what kind of a person owns him?
39:15Well, that would probably be an old lady or an elderly gay man.
39:18Great.
39:19We can tell you there are two dogs.
39:23Nailed it.
39:24Well, the question is which Johnny owns which dog?
39:29Oh.
39:30Who's been doing more walking?
39:33It's impossible to tell, isn't it?
39:36Golden retriever.
39:37Yeah.
39:38That's my Gujon.
39:39Yeah, golden doodle.
39:40I am, of course.
39:41He's going to one.
39:42He's going to one.
39:43I am, of course, an heavenly gamer.
39:45Hello, Ash.
39:46Hello.
39:47So we have a series of pictures which show you at your absolute peak.
39:52So we thought we'd play a game.
39:53Are you up for this?
39:54Yeah.
39:55Okay, it's called Game Face, where you have to tell us which event you are participating
40:01in, just going from your facial expressions.
40:03Let's have a look at your first picture.
40:06It has to be long jump, because I always pull the worst faces to a long jump, surely.
40:11You reckon it's long jump?
40:12If I do that in any other event, that's really embarrassing.
40:15Let's find out if it is long jump.
40:17Yay!
40:18It's long jump.
40:19Always the worst photos.
40:20Always.
40:21Let's have a look at another photo, Kate.
40:22Now.
40:23I know it instantly.
40:24Could have been a really big curry.
40:25What do you reckon, Kate?
40:26Has to be the shot put.
40:27The shot put.
40:28Has to be.
40:29This is me trying to do maths.
40:30Right, let's find out if it is the shot put.
40:31It is.
40:32Yay!
40:33Let's have one more.
40:34Let's have a look.
40:35Um, I know it again, it's long jump.
40:36Has to be like.
40:37Okay, let's have a look.
40:38Is it the long jump?
40:39Has to be.
40:40It is you long jumping over the Libby.
40:41half. Right let's find out if it is the shot put. It is. Let's have one more, let's have
40:51a look, okay. Erm, I know it again, it's long jump, it has to be like. Okay let's have
40:57a look, is it the long jump? It has to be. It is you long jumping over the lift. So we're
41:06going to show you some pictures, this is the view you would have had when you were riding
41:11these horses winning races. Did I, these horses did I ride? Yes. So let's have a look at
41:16horse number one. No way. No way, I didn't ride that horse. It's got a double bridle on,
41:24no way. You did, that's one of yours. That's one of yours. That's one of yours, yeah. There's
41:31no denying it now. I know they don't all look the same when you see the photos. That's one
41:38of yours. They don't all look the same from behind Davy. Right Jaden, look, you rode this
41:44horse, who is it? Sam Crow. Max? Er, well Davy, let's find out if you're right. It is Sam Crow!
41:51That's amazing. Okay we've got another one. Yeah, we've got another. Okay Davy, here's
41:58a look at horse number two. No that is, that is, I would say a harder one. Very hairy.
42:07No, I... No, you did. They're all horses. They're all horses you rode. Right, I, I, I, I don't
42:19know that horse, no. Take a guess. Er, if it's, erm, Fieldor. It's not Irish Point. Oh, good
42:27horse. Yeah. It was my last winner. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. It was my last winner. Yeah,
42:33good horse him. Er, okay. Er, okay. Let's, let's, let's have a look at one more. Let's have
42:38a look at one more. Ah, the man himself, is it? What are you saying? What are you saying?
42:43Is that the tiger? It is tiger oil! Yeah! What is he? Good horse. Good horse. Good horse. Good horse. Good horse. Good horse. Good horse. Okay. Your man still gives out about your fashion choices from time to time.
42:56I mean, is it fair to say she's trolling you a bit? When I'm, she is my ultimate troll. I had to ban her from texting me when I'm live on television.
43:04Because it was. Oh, state of your hair. Jesus. Bit heavy with the makeup. Bit heavy with the makeup this morning. Do you think that, that, do you think that shirt is right? Oh my God, are you pregnant? Did you forget to tell me? And this is just. Wait, in the middle of the show? In the middle of, like, it will start at seven and it will not stop until 10. So I had to ban her. We have some of the messages that your mam has sent you. Oh no.
43:25Oh. She's got out. This is for you. The hair is, the hair is a big page. Can't see your face with your hair. With your hair. Yeah. So this is in the middle of the show. You might check your phone at the brain. 7.40 in the morning. 20 to 8. I've been on air for 40 minutes. We have another one here. Hair lovely, but you're very pale. Very pale.
43:43It's not the time, Mary. We're living in different times, girl. Mary is on fire. 8.19. We've got another one here.
43:49Hate that blouse mirror. Bin bin. Bin bin. Bin bin.
43:54And I think this is my personal favourite. Love your jumper. TV3 keeps showing your spanks.
44:02We've wondered, like, what it's like to get hit by a professional boxer. Yeah. And thankfully Johnny V has said he's willing.
44:08to get hit by a professional boxer. So, I mean, would you? This one's not that potted. Good. Good. Good. It is. It is a bit. Give it to him, Mick. Fucking give it to him.
44:26Give it to him. You sound like that. Yeah. Right.
44:30I've got the wrong thing.
44:32Oh!
44:34Dang it.
44:35Dang it.
44:36Oh, that's all right.
44:39Oh, that's all right. All right. All right. All right. All right. All right.
44:40Why are you gone again?
44:42I've gone again again.
44:44Oh.
44:45What do you want more? You hit me with your bad hand?
44:47I do. Appreciate that.
44:49Oh!
44:51Oh!
44:52Oh!
44:53Oh!
44:54Oh!
44:59Well.
45:01That's what's all in time for tonight lads.
45:04Back in the house with the two johnny's plain no luck in season finale!
45:10Yeah, yeah! Fuck it, yeah!
45:15Shit, it's actually a maniac!
45:19All right.
45:23All right.
45:24Let's do this.
45:54It has no meaning.
45:56Are you ready now? Move to the madness.
45:58I'll call it back to you.
46:00We bring this group to you.
46:02Are you ready now?
46:04Move to the groove.
46:06Put your hands up in the air.
46:08One super question that I ask you.
46:10Are you ready?
46:14Let's do this.
46:16Let's do this.
46:18Let's do this.
46:20Let's do this.
46:22Every single person in the house tonight.
46:24Let's hear you see.
46:26She's a maniac.
46:28She's a maniac.
46:30Maniac on the floor.
46:32And she's dancing.
46:34And she's dancing like she ever did before.
46:38Why do you run the two Chinese dance floor?
46:42To the maniac.
46:44Maniac on the floor.
46:46And she's dancing.
46:48And she's dancing like she never did before.
46:52Audience, we need a patient time.
46:54She said, put your hands in the air.
46:58Side to side like you just don't care.
47:02Everybody in the house on a party night,
47:04scream up back to me.
47:06I'm the young, young, young.
47:08To the maniac.
47:10The maniac on the floor.
47:12And she's dancing.
47:14And she's dancing like she never did before.
47:18The Grand Night.
47:20The Grand Night.
47:26A huge thank you to everyone here in Swan's Bar tonight.
47:30And thank you to all of our guests throughout the series.
47:32And thank you at home for watching.
47:34Now for a very special performance from Dan McCabe playing Grace.
47:38We'll see you soon.
47:40Bye, bye, bye, bye, bye.
47:42Bye, bye, bye, bye.
47:44Bye, bye, bye.
47:46Bye, bye, bye.
47:48Bye, bye.
47:50Bye, bye.
48:00Bye, bye.
48:02Bye, bye.
48:04We have told us we must earn liberty
48:09We'll all I want in this dark place
48:15Is to you how you heal us
48:18Oh, gracious, hold me in your arms
48:26And let this moment linger
48:29You'll take me out the dark and I will die
48:36With all my love I place this wedding ring
48:44Upon your finger
48:46There won't be time to share your love
48:52For me the same
48:54Oh, gracious, hold me in your arms
49:03And let this moment linger
49:06They'll take me out the dark and I will die
49:13With all my love I place this wedding ring
49:21Upon your finger
49:23There won't be time to share our love
49:29For we will say goodbye
49:36There won't be time to share our love
49:43For we will say goodbye
49:52I will give up
49:57Thank you
49:58You
49:59Thank you
49:59All right
50:00You
50:00All right
50:01All right
50:02Go
50:10Go
50:14Go
50:15Go
50:16Go
50:18Go
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