- 26 minutes ago
Watch The Big Bang Theory GalaxyTV Season 8 Episode 5 online in HD on Dailymotion.
Category
🎥
Short filmTranscript
00:03Hey, I read that someone invented a way to convert your footsteps into electromagnetic energy so you can charge your
00:09cell phone while walking.
00:11We had that idea years ago. How come we never did anything with it?
00:14Probably because we left the diagram of it in the restaurant and none of us wanted to walk back.
00:20I know the real reason you never made progress with that idea.
00:23You thought of it September 22, 2007.
00:27Two days later, Penny moved in, and so much blood rushed to your genitals, your brain became a ghost town.
00:35That's not what happened.
00:37I remember it distinctly because I had just composed my annual poem commemorating the anniversary of Dr. Seuss's death.
00:44No one wants to hear it.
00:45Why die? Why did he die? Old told. I was told he was old.
00:52Penny is not the reason I didn't pursue that idea.
00:55Oh, really? Since meeting her, what have been your greatest accomplishments?
01:00Easy. Sleeping with Penny.
01:02Getting Penny to go back out with him after she dumped him.
01:05Chicking Penny into getting engaged.
01:07And a few weeks ago, he almost did a pull-up.
01:12I think someone owes me an apology.
01:16Well, don't feel bad. I think we've all been distracted since the girls entered our lives.
01:21You admit Amy's a distraction?
01:23Oh, very much so.
01:24Listen to this. This is from two days ago.
01:28Hi. Hope you're having a good day.
01:30Who has time for this constant sexting?
01:34Well, maybe we have lost our focus.
01:37It wouldn't kill us to get together and brainstorm ideas.
01:41Ooh, we could have one of those retreats.
01:43Like our own science retreat.
01:45My cousin has a cabin out in the woods.
01:47I'm not going to a cabin in the woods.
01:49Did you see the movie Cabin in the Woods?
01:52Then we'll go to a hotel.
01:54A hotel? Did you see The Shining?
01:58We could go up to Big Bear and get a house on the lake.
02:01Well, did you see the lake house?
02:04Nothing bad happens in the lake house.
02:06Well, no, not to them. To me.
02:09Time-traveling mailbox.
02:11The only time that travels an hour I have in my life down the toilet.
02:14Okay, fine. Then we'll just stay here and do it.
02:16Well, you didn't suggest a beach house.
02:18You would go to a beach house?
02:19Well, good lord. Now, have you seen Jaws?
02:23Our whole universe was in a hot, dense state
02:27that nearly 14 million years ago
02:29expansion started way more.
02:31The earth began to cool.
02:32The autotrophs began to drool.
02:33The androids developed tools.
02:35We built the walls.
02:36We built the pyramids.
02:37Math, science, history, unraveling the mystery.
02:40It all started with the Big Bang.
02:49Hey!
02:49Hey.
02:50So, the guys and I are talking about having kind of a science retreat this weekend.
02:53I just wanted to know if that's okay.
02:55You and I talked about going to brunch on Sunday.
02:57Want to go to Vegas this weekend?
02:58Of course I do.
03:00Bernadette, Girls Week in Vegas. You in?
03:02Oh, yeah.
03:02Yes.
03:04I'll check flights.
03:05I'll check hotels.
03:06I'll check my underpants.
03:06I'm so excited, I think I peed.
03:17They seem okay with it.
03:24Hey.
03:25Hey.
03:25I didn't think you'd make it.
03:27Why not?
03:27Well, because you have a steady girlfriend now,
03:29and we assumed you'd have to stay home
03:30to lower the food down to her and the pet.
03:37For your information, Emily's working tonight.
03:41Yeah, one would assume I'm getting out of the pit.
03:45Okay, let's focus.
03:47The girls are gone.
03:47We have 48 hours.
03:48There are no distractions.
03:50Let's change the world.
03:51Thinking caps on.
03:52Here we go.
03:53Ooh, this is exciting.
03:54We're innovating.
03:55I feel like we're in the Facebook movie.
03:57Oh, I never saw that.
03:59Yeah, really?
04:00Ooh, it's wonderful.
04:01And I swear I'm not saying that because Justin Timberlake is in it.
04:06Yeah, I have it on Blu-ray.
04:08We should watch it.
04:09Oh, cool.
04:10I'll make the popcorn.
04:12Guys, in 30 seconds, we went from let's change the world to let's watch TV.
04:18I'm sorry.
04:19Is that a no?
04:21Okay, no, Leonard's right.
04:22We're here to focus.
04:23Didn't we used to have a list of all our ideas?
04:25I think I still have it.
04:27I did not get a clear answer.
04:29I'm going to set this down now.
04:32Ah, here it is.
04:34Oh, I haven't looked at these in years.
04:37Robot girlfriend.
04:39Mmm, that was mine.
04:42Robot prostitute.
04:45Also mine.
04:47Wait, I'm confused.
04:48Why would you need both a robot girlfriend and a robot prostitute?
04:51It's just some things you don't do with your robot girlfriend.
04:57Boy, when you met Bernadette, the field of robotics really took a hit.
05:02Okay, let's just skip all the inventions you can have sex with.
05:13All right, no, here we go.
05:15Ergonomic heated seat cushion.
05:16No, it vibrates.
05:17Keep going.
05:21You know, let's just come up with something new.
05:24You know, a number of significant innovations have been inspired by science fiction.
05:28The geosynchronous satellite from Arthur C. Clarke.
05:31The Motorola flip phone, that came from Star Trek.
05:34Yeah, and I have long suspected that the idea of an African-American president was stolen from the movie Deep
05:39Impact.
05:43Hey, the future of the show in Back to the Future 2 is only a year away.
05:48A lot of things in that movie haven't been invented yet.
05:51How cool would it be if we could make one of those a reality?
05:53If we could figure out the scientific basis for Marty's hoverboard, that would have universal application.
05:59It's possible at absolute zero, but we would have to remove the temperature restrictions.
06:04Oh, I have an idea.
06:05I think I have the same one.
06:07We gotta watch Back to the Future 2.
06:11I'll make the popcorn.
06:15So, where should we go first?
06:17Oh, there's a cover band in the lounge.
06:20Nah.
06:20But they play Barry Manilow.
06:22No.
06:23But they're called Fairly Manilow.
06:27Oh, okay.
06:28Great!
06:29No!
06:31What do you want to do?
06:32Well, we're in Vegas.
06:34I want to go downstairs, get a bucket of margaritas, dance until I vomit all over a roulette wheel, and
06:39watch it go everywhere.
06:41What if we don't want to vomit?
06:43Oh, you will.
06:44That's why they give you the bucket.
06:47Uh-oh.
06:48What?
06:48It's my boss.
06:50They move my field right up to Monday.
06:52What does that mean?
06:53It means instead of having a week to study, I only have two days.
06:57That sucks.
06:58Oh, can you start in the morning?
07:00It's kind of a lot.
07:01You know, let me do a little tonight, and I'll catch up with you guys later.
07:04You sure?
07:05Yeah, it's okay.
07:05Go ahead.
07:08So, um, now that Penny's not coming...
07:10We're not seeing Fairly Manilow.
07:19Hold on, pause.
07:21Something doesn't make sense.
07:23Look.
07:25In 2015, Biff steals the sports almanac and takes the time machine back to 1955 to give it to his
07:33younger self.
07:34But as soon as he does that, he changes the future.
07:37So the 2015 he returns to would be a different 2015, not the 2015 that Marty and Doc were in.
07:43This is hot tub time machine all over again.
07:49If future Biff goes back to 2015 right after he gives young Biff the almanac, he could get back to
07:55the 2015 with Marty and Doc in it.
07:57Because it wasn't until his 21st birthday that 1955 Biff placed his first bet.
08:03Wait, whoa, whoa, whoa.
08:04Is placed right?
08:05What do you mean?
08:06Is placed the right tense for something that would have happened in the future of a past that was affected
08:12by something from the future?
08:15Had will have placed?
08:18That's my boy.
08:21Okay, so it wasn't until his 21st birthday that Biff had will have placed his first bet and made his
08:28millions.
08:28That's when he altered the timeline.
08:30But he had will haven't placed it.
08:36What?
08:38Unlike hot tub time machine, this couldn't be more simple.
08:41When Biff gets the almanac in 1955, the alternate future he creates isn't the one in which Marty and Doc
08:48Brown ever used the time machine to travel to 2015.
08:51Therefore, in the new timeline, Marty and Doc never brought the time machine...
08:56Wait, wait, wait.
08:56Is brought right?
09:02Marty and Doc never had, have, had brought?
09:07I don't know.
09:08You did it to me.
09:11I'm going with it.
09:12Marty and Doc never had, have, had brought the time machine to 2015.
09:17That means 2015 Biff could also not had, have, had brought the almanac to 1955 Biff.
09:24Therefore, the timeline in which 1955 Biff gets the almanac is also the timeline in which 1955 Biff never gets
09:32the almanac.
09:33And not just never gets.
09:34Never have, never hasn't, never had, have, hasn't.
09:43Is right?
09:47Also, what kind of name is Biff?
09:49Sounds like when you pop open a can of Pillsbury dough.
09:53Biff.
09:56Oh, that stuff is so good wrapped around cocktail weenies.
09:59Guys.
10:00Do you know that the word wiener comes from the German name of the Austrian capital Vienna, or Wien?
10:05Do you know if you look at Austria on a map, it actually looks like a wiener?
10:09Guys, what are we doing?
10:10We sent the girls away so we could focus.
10:14I don't think it worked.
10:27Maybe after this you'll be in the mood for some Manilow.
10:31I think after this I'll be dead.
10:35Look at us, out, while Penny's in the room studying.
10:38I'm proud of her.
10:39This is a great opportunity, it's nice to see her take it seriously.
10:42It is.
10:43But enough about Penny, let's talk about us.
10:47We're looking good.
10:49We are.
10:51Better than good.
10:52I mean, look at you, your body's banging.
10:56Amy.
10:57Don't Amy me, we're always talking about how hot Penny is.
11:00Come on.
11:01Scientist to scientist, how big are those hadron colliders?
11:08You're embarrassing me.
11:10Oh, don't be embarrassed.
11:11I'll show you the divot in my spine.
11:14What?
11:14No, no, it's okay.
11:15I was born with it.
11:16If you put a double-A battery in there, it makes my leg kick.
11:23All right.
11:24Oh, this is already better.
11:26There are far fewer distractions in here.
11:29Plus, this is where our minds are conditioned to focus on work.
11:31So, I've been thinking about the hoverboards, and maybe there's a way we could use maglev technology.
11:36Or if we could figure out a way to super cool the materials, we could utilize quantum coupling.
11:40Oh, I wonder if anyone's tried that.
11:42Go online and look it up.
11:44I can't argue with him.
11:46It's right there on the screen.
11:47Austria does look like a wiener.
11:51That's nothing, dude.
11:53Go check out how hung Florida is.
11:57I'm sure Mrs. Florida's walking funny.
11:59Can we get back to work?
12:02He's right.
12:04Oh, here's a thought.
12:05What if we use some form of operant conditioning techniques to keep us from getting off topic?
12:11Like behavior modification?
12:12Yeah, exactly.
12:14Did you know those techniques were used to actually teach pigeons to play ping pong?
12:19That cannot be true.
12:30Hey, it was match point.
12:35Some psychologists perform operant conditioning with punishment.
12:38Maybe we can come up with a punishment for straying off topic.
12:42Not getting to see who wins that pigeon ping pong comes to mind.
12:47We could snap a rubber band on our wrists every time we get sidetracked.
12:51Not bad.
12:52You know, in medieval times, idle chatter was punished with a device called the scold's bridle.
12:58It's an iron cage that's locked around the head and pierces the tongue.
13:02Um, if only we had one.
13:08Oh, I'll check Amazon.
13:16Housekeeping!
13:20We got a complaint about somebody pooping on a party in there.
13:27It was us the whole time.
13:30Why did you tell her it was working?
13:33Was it working?
13:35Yeah.
13:37I'm so sorry.
13:40You guys look like you're having fun.
13:42We're having the best time.
13:44Guess who won a hundred dollars playing craps?
13:48That's a dollar.
13:50And guess who wildly over-tipped a cocktail waitress?
13:54Hey, Penny, let's go.
13:56We found a place that has Australian male strippers.
13:59We want to see if they twirl their junk in the other direction.
14:14That sounds so great, but I have a little more studying to do.
14:18Can you believe this, nerd?
14:22Come on, do you want to sit here and be a loser?
14:24Or do you want to watch me climb into an Australian man's G-string like a baby kangaroo?
14:35All right, guys, look, I would love to go out, but I've got to get this done, okay?
14:39So have fun at the club.
14:40And if you get in trouble, find a policeman.
14:43And if he's taking off his pants, he is not a real policeman.
14:47Okay, okay, this is obviously very important to her.
14:50Let's just, well, help her study so she can get done quicker.
14:54Here, here, I'm going to quiz you.
14:55I'm going to quiz you.
14:58I got your notes!
15:00I got your notes!
15:02I got your notes!
15:03If you want these, they're going to be at the strip club!
15:08Where did you go, Jason?
15:10To the walk-in closet, sure.
15:20Okay, so we agree.
15:21Whenever someone takes us off topic, they get their arm hair yanked off.
15:26Can I really go and let that happen, or the girl who does my eyebrows will think I've been cheating
15:29on her?
15:31All right.
15:32Now, one benefit of quantum coupling is...
15:35Boy, no, a question.
15:36Who decides if someone's gone off topic?
15:38I think it'll be pretty clear.
15:40If not, we'll take a vote.
15:41Oh, also...
15:42Ow!
15:45What?
15:46We didn't vote!
15:47We didn't have to.
15:48That was clearly a tangent.
15:49Now, come on.
15:50Back to work.
15:51If we're leaning towards quantum coupling, we just...
15:53Ow!
15:55You said quantum coupling.
15:57That made me think of the show Quantum Leap.
15:59That's a tangent, and it's your fault.
16:02Ridiculous.
16:02Sheldon, I vote.
16:03That is not a tangent.
16:04Yeah, thank you.
16:05And now I owe you one.
16:06Ow!
16:08That was your fault.
16:10Yay!
16:11That is a lot of hair.
16:14Ow!
16:16And now I'm going to hear it from Jenny.
16:20Everyone stop.
16:21This was a stupid idea.
16:23Negative reinforcement isn't working.
16:25I think you mean positive punishment.
16:27Negative reinforcement is the removal of a positive stimulus.
16:30It's a common mistake.
16:31Negative reinforcement is really wrong?
16:33Oh, it's used incorrectly all the time.
16:36Even Bill Murray makes that mistake in the first scene of Ghostbusters.
16:39No way.
16:40Not Bill Murray.
16:43I'm studying the effect of negative reinforcement on ESP ability.
16:48Huh.
16:48Bill Murray did get it wrong.
16:51Jump ahead to the Stay Puft Marshmallow Man.
16:53No!
16:56Leonard's right.
16:57We can't just jump ahead.
16:59We have to watch the whole movie.
17:02We keep procrastinating.
17:04Oh, we saw Back to the Future 2.
17:05Pigeons playing ping pong.
17:06A bunch of countries that look like genitals.
17:08And one guy whose genitals look like Denmark.
17:12Yeah, sorry for clicking on that.
17:16It's late.
17:17We've wasted hours.
17:19Can we please find it in ourselves to do any amount of work tonight?
17:22But we didn't see them bust one ghost.
17:27So you're saying we should stand here in my lab on a Saturday night
17:32and watch the rest of Ghostbusters on a crappy laptop?
17:35No.
17:44It really does hold up.
17:58See, is this better than a hotel room?
18:01Yep, shake that thing.
18:04Have you ever seen a body so fun?
18:08We had some pretty hot corpses in my anatomy class,
18:11but none of them move like that.
18:25Good morning.
18:27You want to go to the pool?
18:29Oh.
18:31Come on.
18:32You said it yourself.
18:34Only nerds and losers stay in the room.
18:40Wow, it's bright out.
18:42Isn't it bright?
18:43I should probably close these curtains.
18:45Nah.
18:45Bye.
18:48Please close the drapes.
18:50Okay.
18:52Okay.
19:04We'll see you next time.
19:13Bye.
19:16Bye.
19:19Bye.
19:22Bye.
19:23You
Comments