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Chasing Her Ashes The Fallen Arbiter
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00:00En Midgard, yo usé mi poder para hacer un secreto en maravilla,
00:03tirando a él de su abuelo de su abuelo.
00:05Después de la muerte, él ascended como el árbol de Helheim,
00:08emprisonando y torturando me.
00:09Por cien años, él hizo asegurado que cada alma en Helheim
00:12sabía que yo era su esposa.
00:13Luego, en el encontro de su hermano de su hermano,
00:16él drove dozens de espacios de helforged en mi cuerpo.
00:19Él declaró que mi corazón era vile,
00:21mi manos estén con las vidas de los inocentes,
00:24y él flooded mi alma con la oscuridad.
00:26Entonces, antes de cada mirada, él me dio dos opciones.
00:30Mane y ser su hermano de su hermano como penance,
00:33o entrar en la Halla de Anguición como un corrupción de su alma,
00:35a sufrir endlessly y ser reborn en su servitud
00:38a través de todas las vidas,
00:39nunca a conocer una buena muerte.
00:40Él sabía que yo feared el dolor, feared el dolor,
00:43pero si tuviera que tener todo el dolor,
00:45si mi vida no sabía de su hermano de su hermano,
00:47no podía no dejar de su hermano de su lado un momento más.
00:50Después de 100 años, en el abuelo de Segred,
00:52yo me fui finalmente liberado de ese lácteo de su dungeon.
00:54Cuando el iron chains fell de mis pierced collarbones,
00:57pensaba que me sentía más ligera.
00:59Instead, todo lo he felt fue la dense,
01:01crushing wave de dolor de dolor.
01:02Seguiendo me hesitate,
01:04un death guard shovedme hard from behind.
01:06Mi lords, suave me to the wanted one city.
01:09Move!
01:11Don't make me late with my dreams.
01:13Su expression was stone cold.
01:15He no fear de que me disobeyen,
01:16porque Segred ha puesto un curse en mí.
01:18Desde el momento de la Halla de Anguición,
01:20I was every soul's dog,
01:21summoned,
01:22dismissed,
01:23forbidden to resist.
01:24Now,
01:25I lowered my eyes,
01:26swallowed the pain,
01:27and walked out of the Arbiter's Hall.
01:29The moment I entered the city,
01:30a force seized me and wrenched me down.
01:34I crashed hard to the ground.
01:36The wounds on my shoulders tore open,
01:38another bloom of blood and rot.
01:40Zorin,
01:40standing at Segred's side,
01:42let a flash of pleasure cross her eyes.
01:44Then she twisted her face into fear
01:46and reddened her eyes.
01:47Segred,
01:48what did I ever do
01:50to make Rowan hate me so much
01:51that she would sever my limbs
01:53and have me tortured to death?
01:55The moment she spoke,
01:56Segred's gaze turned to ice.
01:57Don't be afraid.
01:59I'll make her pay.
02:00He never merely said things.
02:01The moment the words left his lips,
02:03he drove dozens of hellforged spikes
02:05into my forelimbs.
02:06The agony hit like a collapsing sky.
02:08I couldn't hold back my scream.
02:10Every wound Saurin bore,
02:12I will return to you a hundredfold.
02:15Rowan's heart is rotten.
02:17She has taken lives without mercy.
02:19Her crimes are unforgivable.
02:21Under Saurin's cues,
02:22the crowd began to point and condemn.
02:24A woman like her
02:25deserves to be cast
02:26into the deepest abyss of Niphim,
02:29never to be reborn.
02:30Hearing their words,
02:32Segred poured more darkness
02:33into my soul,
02:34his voice cold as iron.
02:36I give you two choices.
02:37Either remain and serve Saurdur
02:39in penance,
02:39or enter the Hall of Anguish
02:41as a corrupted soul,
02:42be reborn into slavery
02:44across every life,
02:45and never know a good death.
02:47The pain was so absolute,
02:48I couldn't form a single word.
02:50Of course.
02:51You're too selfish,
02:52too cowardly.
02:53Why would you ever choose
02:55the cycle of Yggdorick?
02:57He turned and took Saurin's hand.
02:59Let's go.
03:00We have a wedding to plan.
03:02He knew I feared pain,
03:04feared suffering.
03:04He didn't believe
03:05I would choose rebirth,
03:06and so he went off cheerfully
03:07to plan his wedding.
03:08What he didn't know
03:09was that the moment
03:10I was released from the dungeon,
03:11I had already gone
03:12to the Hall of Anguish
03:13to register for the cycle
03:14of Yggdrasil.
03:15Even if I had to endure
03:17every torment,
03:17even if my next life
03:18would know no peace,
03:19I could not bear to remain
03:20at his side one moment longer.
03:24By now,
03:25every soul in Helheim
03:26knew the story.
03:27In Midgard,
03:28I had used my power
03:28to force Sigrid into marrying me.
03:30I had murdered his aging mother.
03:31I had ordered Saurin's limbs severed
03:33and left her to be tortured.
03:35He had hated me
03:36with everything he had.
03:37In Midgard,
03:38he endured it all in silence,
03:39and in the tenth year
03:40of our marriage,
03:41he slaughtered
03:42the entire Rowan clan,
03:43dozens of lives,
03:44and then killed me.
03:46After my death,
03:46I learned the truth.
03:47He was the arbiter of Helheim,
03:49the High Valkyrie.
03:50Because of his hatred for me,
03:52he kept me imprisoned
03:52at his side for a century
03:53and subjected me
03:54to every torment
03:55he could devise.
03:56But what he didn't know
03:57was that he had hated
03:59the wrong woman.
03:59I had never killed his mother.
04:01I had never touched Saurin.
04:06For the first ten years
04:07of my imprisonment,
04:08I never stopped
04:09trying to explain.
04:10It wasn't me.
04:11But Sigrid would grab me
04:12by the throat,
04:13eyes blazing red,
04:14and scream,
04:14I only believe what I saw
04:15with my own eyes.
04:16Time wore me down.
04:18I went numb.
04:19I stopped explaining.
04:20Now he told every soul,
04:21it was I who had taken him
04:22by force
04:23and compelled him
04:24into marriage.
04:24He had forgotten.
04:26The year we first met,
04:27he was huddled
04:28among beggars,
04:28and he took the bowl
04:29of porridge
04:30I extended to him
04:31and he looked up at me.
04:32That young man
04:33had gazed at me
04:34with something pure
04:34and shy in his eyes.
04:35My lady,
04:36do you need a guard?
04:38I'll work for a meal.
04:40It was a time of war
04:41and chaos.
04:42My heart had gone soft.
04:43I brought him home.
04:44I had people care
04:45for his ailing mother
04:46and younger brother.
04:47Years passed.
04:48He stood in front of me,
04:49unyielding,
04:49when danger came.
04:50Then came the day
04:51the royal house
04:52called for concerts.
04:53He grabbed my hand
04:54with reddened eyes
04:54and pleaded,
04:55Don't go.
04:57I'll work until
04:58I'm worthy of you.
04:59Can't you
05:00just consider me?
05:02I had no desire
05:03to marry some prince
05:04and he had moved me
05:04just a little.
05:05So I said yes.
05:06He said he loved me.
05:08He said he would
05:08give himself fully
05:09and would not waver
05:10for a lifetime.
05:11After we wed,
05:11he gave me everything.
05:12He was tireless,
05:13devoted,
05:14always striving.
05:15Ten years passed.
05:16We were bound
05:17without doubt or shadow.
05:18Then came the moment
05:19he raised a bow
05:19and put an arrow
05:20through my chest
05:21and I finally understood
05:22he had never loved me at all.
05:27Now he looked
05:28at my wretched figure
05:29with not a single
05:30flicker of emotion
05:31in his eyes.
05:32In seven days,
05:33Sorda and I will be wed.
05:35Right now,
05:35I need to take her
05:36to be fitted
05:36for wedding robes.
05:37Crawl back on your own
05:38and prepare to begin
05:39your penance.
05:40With that,
05:40he left with Sorin.
05:42The onlookers
05:42needed no invitation.
05:44The sneering words
05:44came fast.
05:45She entered Helhem
05:46and immediately
05:47called herself his wife.
05:48I almost believed
05:49they were devoted
05:50to each other.
05:51Turns out,
05:52he only kept her around
05:53to let his beloved
05:54vent her anger.
05:54They laughed.
05:55They sneered.
05:56I did not raise my head.
05:57I used every last
05:58fragment of strength
05:59to drag myself forward.
06:00Blood trailed
06:01in thin streaks
06:02across the road.
06:03I ignored the pain
06:04consuming my body
06:04and crawled,
06:05truly crawled,
06:06back to the Arbiter's Hall.
06:10When I finally looked up,
06:11I did not know
06:12how much time had passed.
06:13Sigrid and Sorin
06:14returned to find me
06:15at the gates,
06:16drenched in blood.
06:16Sorin let out a sharp cry
06:17and rushed over,
06:18pulling me upright.
06:19Rowan,
06:21why are you covered
06:22in blood like this?
06:23She asked,
06:24though she already knew.
06:25The delight behind her eyes
06:26was unmistakable.
06:27My stomach turned.
06:28I tried to pull my hand free.
06:29Sorin crumpled
06:30straight to the ground.
06:31Sigrid's eyes
06:32went wide with fury.
06:33Sorin!
06:34He caught her immediately.
06:35When he saw she had fainted,
06:37his expression darkened.
06:38Without pause,
06:39he blasted me away.
06:39I was hurled a dozen meters
06:41and slammed into a wall.
06:42I couldn't stop the blood
06:43that came up with the impact.
06:44The pain in my body doubled.
06:46I clenched my fist against it.
06:48Out of the corner of my eye,
06:49I watched Sigrid
06:50carry Sorin on his back
06:51and leave swiftly,
06:52pausing only to give a cold order.
06:54Throw Rowan
06:54into the chasm of Niggdug.
06:56Let her learn her place.
06:58I won't have her
06:59forgetting what she is.
07:00He didn't hesitate
07:01for a single breath
07:02before concluding
07:03it was I who had harmed Sorin.
07:04He never once asked,
07:05what could I,
07:06a hollowed out soul,
07:07have even done?
07:08I said nothing.
07:09I did not call after him.
07:10I simply let the death guards
07:11drag me away.
07:12Because I already knew,
07:13Sigrid would never believe me.
07:15The pain was overwhelming.
07:16I couldn't stop my eyes
07:17from closing.
07:20I drifted in and out
07:21of consciousness
07:22as they hauled me
07:22off the street.
07:23They were not gentle.
07:24They dragged me
07:25through thorns,
07:26leaving me torn and raw.
07:27A figure made of blood.
07:28The guards felt nothing.
07:30They simply pitched me
07:31over the edge
07:31and into the chasm
07:32of Nidhugger.
07:33The chasm is the one place
07:34every soul dreads most.
07:36The void serpents down there
07:37will keep you drowning
07:38in your own suffering,
07:39alive enough
07:40to wish you weren't.
07:41Every soul in this realm
07:43can see how much Sorin
07:44and means to our lord.
07:46You still went
07:47and provoked her.
07:48You deserve exactly this.
07:51They believed I deserved it.
07:52They walked away,
07:53not knowing I had done nothing.
07:55But I understood.
07:56Even if they knew,
07:57they would not help me.
07:59Without Hala present,
08:00Helheim answered to Sigrid.
08:01There was nothing more to say,
08:03nothing that would matter.
08:04The wind screamed past my ears.
08:06Then came the impact.
08:07I hit the floor of the chasm
08:08and the force tore more blood from me,
08:10painting my pale-faced crimson.
08:11The void serpents caught the scent
08:13and struck without waiting.
08:14Fang sank into my arm.
08:15As the venom spread,
08:16I closed my eyes.
08:19Long buried memories were pulled free
08:21and without meaning to,
08:22I smiled.
08:23Yet a single tear slipped into my hair.
08:25At the start of the story,
08:26my eyes had been full of happiness.
08:27Then a snowstorm passed
08:29and my eyes were dyed in blood.
08:30My beautiful husband came with an army
08:32and slaughtered my entire clan.
08:34When he looked at me,
08:35his eyes held nothing but hatred.
08:37That night,
08:37surrounded by the bodies
08:38of everyone I had loved,
08:40I screamed until I had nothing left.
08:41But my parents,
08:42who had cherished me,
08:44my sister,
08:45not one of them
08:45would ever answer me again.
08:47Secret stood with a bow in his hands,
08:49soaked in the blood of the Rowan clan,
08:50his eyes cold with savage satisfaction.
08:53I watched,
08:54numb,
08:54as he stepped forward
08:55and drove his blade through my chest
08:56without flinching.
08:57Before I fell,
08:58I asked him,
08:59Why?
09:00He stepped closer.
09:01With quiet tenderness,
09:03he wiped the blood
09:04from the corner of my lips,
09:05then smiled,
09:06and the smile was winter.
09:07I only ever saw Saul
09:09as a younger sister.
09:10Even if she was in love with me,
09:12why did you have to destroy her utterly?
09:14My mother treated you
09:15with nothing but kindness.
09:16You didn't spare her either.
09:18Rowan,
09:18how can you be this cruel?
09:20Desolation rose
09:20from somewhere deep in my chest.
09:22He was my husband,
09:23and without a single question,
09:25he had butchered my entire family
09:26and laid every crime at my feet.
09:28I had barely crossed paths with Sorin
09:29more than a handful of times.
09:31I had loved him
09:32with everything I had.
09:33Why would I ever have harmed his family?
09:35But it didn't matter.
09:36Nothing had ever been real between us.
09:38There was no tenderness to speak of.
09:40Not once.
09:40Not ever.
09:43Self-loathing sank
09:44into the marrow of me.
09:45I could not stop
09:46the anguished sounds
09:47that tore from my throat,
09:49nor the tears
09:49that fell without ceasing.
09:51The void serpents
09:52fed greedily on my suffering,
09:53curling the corners
09:54of their mouths
09:54in satisfaction.
09:55My family appeared before me,
09:57and their accusations
09:58came one after another.
10:00Rowan,
10:00how can you still love
10:02the one who destroyed us?
10:03He killed your family.
10:05Why haven't you made him pay?
10:07Rowan.
10:07If you hadn't let jealousy
10:09drive you to hurt
10:10Sorin and Sigran's mother,
10:12we would never have died.
10:14The whispers
10:14and the contempt
10:15circled me without end.
10:17I shook my head violently.
10:18The disappointment in their eyes
10:20broke something inside me.
10:21I didn't do it.
10:22My voice came out
10:23as a ragged rasp.
10:24My eyes were so swollen
10:25I could barely see.
10:26The suffering pouring from me
10:28drew more and more
10:28void serpents close.
10:29They sank their fangs in again,
10:31extracting the anguish,
10:32harvesting it.
10:33There was no escape.
10:34I could only relive it,
10:35drown in it,
10:36again and again,
10:37until I lost consciousness entirely.
10:40When I opened my eyes again,
10:42I was no longer
10:43in the chasm of Nidhuger.
10:44The familiar surroundings
10:45told me at once
10:46this was Sigrid's estate.
10:48Rowan,
10:49I'm so sorry.
10:50I never expected Sigrid
10:52to misunderstand
10:52and throw you into the chasm.
10:54I only fainted yesterday
10:55because I can't stand
10:56the sight of blood.
10:57Startled myself, really.
10:59I'm terribly embarrassed about it.
11:01Rowan is so kind-hearted.
11:03You'll forgive me, won't you?
11:05After all,
11:07I've decided not to hold a grudge
11:09about what you did
11:09to me in Midwar.
11:10Her eyes were filled with triumph.
11:12She was telling me plainly,
11:13even the smallest incident
11:14would be enough
11:15to make Sigrid
11:15turn his fury on me.
11:16I didn't speak,
11:17but Sigrid's face
11:18had already hardened.
11:19Soren came to apologize
11:20in good faith,
11:21and this is how you respond?
11:23She's chosen not to pursue
11:24what you did to her
11:25in Midland,
11:26and you can't even offer
11:27a single word of apology.
11:29Today,
11:30you will apologize to Soren.
11:32If you don't,
11:33I have no problem
11:34keeping you in the chas
11:35of Nindo indefinitely,
11:37suffering every single day.
11:38Rowan,
11:39just bend a little.
11:40After this,
11:41we can be friends again.
11:42Her contempt was clear as glass.
11:44It pricked at something in me.
11:47I'm sorry.
11:48I had no desire to apologize,
11:50but I knew with certainty
11:51Sigrid would make me pay
11:52on Soren's behalf regardless.
11:54Good.
11:55At least you know
11:56when to yield.
11:57I couldn't afford
11:58to lose my chance
11:59at the cycle of Yggdrasil.
12:01That apology bought me
12:02a brief,
12:02fragile peace.
12:03A few days later,
12:04the moment I was well enough
12:05to leave my chamber,
12:06I moved to go,
12:07but Soren stepped into my path.
12:11Going out to enjoy yourself,
12:12Rowan?
12:14Then bring me back a lantern.
12:16I'm too occupied
12:17with the wedding to bother.
12:20I had no desire to humor her,
12:22but even less desire
12:23to endure her wheedling.
12:24I agreed.
12:25The moment I stepped out
12:26of the estate,
12:27I went straight
12:27to the hall of anguish.
12:28The warden led me inside,
12:30but no sooner had I faced
12:32the first trial of love
12:33and hatred
12:33than I nearly came apart
12:34at the seams,
12:36my soul unraveling.
12:40The warden brought me back out,
12:43shaking his head with a sigh.
12:45You cannot yet withstand
12:47the torments of love,
12:48hate,
12:49and obsession.
12:51I'll hold your place.
12:53Come back when you've recovered.
12:57There was nothing to be done.
12:58I could only return
12:59to the Arbiter's Hall.
13:00Secret's curse left me no choice.
13:01When Soren saw me,
13:02she immediately took the lantern
13:03from my hands with a smile.
13:05I wanted to leave.
13:06Someone grabbed my wrist.
13:10I turned.
13:11You went to the Hall of Anguish?
13:13I lowered my eyes slightly.
13:15I merely passed by.
13:16He looked at my ashen face,
13:18pressed the unease back down.
13:19What?
13:21You saw the trials
13:23and were frightened
13:23into looking like that?
13:25He exhaled with quiet relief,
13:27a scornful thought
13:27crossing his mind.
13:28I was so small
13:30and so cowardly.
13:31Why would I ever enter
13:32the cycle of Yggdrasil
13:33just to leave him?
13:34I said nothing more.
13:35I turned to go,
13:36then heard Soren
13:37let out a sharp cry
13:38and collapse,
13:39vomiting blood.
13:40The lantern had been unwrapped.
13:42The warmth of Midgard
13:43still clung to it.
13:44Any soul who had passed
13:46into Helheim
13:46would be burned
13:47by such living light.
13:49Do you hate Sura so much
13:51you'd see her soul torn apart?
13:53I pressed my lips together
13:54and said nothing.
13:55Since you love the light
13:56of the living world so much,
13:58let me give you
13:59your fill of it.
14:03At noon the following day,
14:05I was taken to Midgard.
14:06The blazing sun fell on me
14:08like a judgment.
14:09The pain was beyond bearing.
14:10In the shadows,
14:11a death guard shuddered.
14:13You can offend anyone
14:15in this realm.
14:16Just join me.
14:17My lord is merciless.
14:20For one moment,
14:21I felt myself beginning
14:22to dissolve.
14:23Then Sigrid reappeared
14:24and wrenched me back
14:25into Helheim.
14:26I was forced to my knees
14:27before Soren.
14:27Sigrid's voice was flat
14:28as still water.
14:30Apologize.
14:31He stood firm.
14:32I said nothing.
14:34Soren glanced between us
14:35and waved Sigrid off.
14:37Let me have a word
14:38alone with Rowan.
14:40Of course.
14:43The moment he left,
14:44Soren rose from her sickbed
14:45as though nothing had happened
14:46at all
14:47and produced a memory stone.
14:49Look at these people.
14:51Do you recognize them?
14:53I looked up instinctively.
14:55My parents.
14:56My family.
14:57All of them.
14:58Surrounded by something
14:59that looked like
14:59the inside of a furnace.
15:02Because of you,
15:03Sigrid and I
15:04were torn apart.
15:07And your family,
15:09they deserved
15:10what they got.
15:11Sigrid kept them around
15:13and overstimed
15:14so I could my anger.
15:16They're screaming.
15:18Isn't it lovely?
15:19Don't you want to hear it?
15:21Her smile was radiant.
15:22Her eyes were full of cruelty.
15:23My vision flooded red.
15:24I couldn't stop myself.
15:25My hands closed
15:26around her throat.
15:27You deserve to die.
15:32But she laughed
15:33and then her face
15:33crumpled into fear.
15:36Sigrid!
15:37One word.
15:38Sigrid came at once,
15:40pulling her free,
15:40and the rage that blazed
15:41in his eyes
15:42when he turned on me
15:43was absolute.
15:44Since hatred is all you have,
15:46I'll send you
15:47to the Hall of Anguish
15:48and strip it out of you.
15:51I won't have you
15:52thinking about
15:53hurting Sorin ever again.
15:57In an instant,
15:58I was thrown before
15:59the gates of the Hall of Anguish.
16:01Sigrid expected me to beg.
16:02I didn't look back.
16:03I walked straight
16:04through the doors,
16:05into the blazing Hall of Hatred,
16:06without hesitating
16:07for a single step.
16:08Sigrid watched.
16:09Something lodged
16:10in his chest,
16:11but he turned
16:12and left anyway.
16:14In the days that followed,
16:16Sigrid went through
16:16the motions
16:17of preparing the wedding,
16:18distracted and hollow.
16:20And I,
16:20inside the Hall of Anguish,
16:22walked through
16:22every trial there was.
16:24On the day of their wedding,
16:25I finally stepped
16:26onto the path
16:27of Yggdrasil's cycle.
16:28The old woman
16:29held out the mead
16:29of oblivion.
16:30I drained it
16:31in one swallow
16:31and left no trace
16:32of it on my lips.
16:34She watched my retreating back
16:35and shook her head quietly.
16:37All things are written
16:38in fate.
16:39Before the wedding ceremony began,
16:41Sigrid turned his gaze
16:42toward the Hall of Anguish,
16:43as if drawn by something
16:44he couldn't name.
16:45Zoran concealed the malice
16:46in her eyes
16:47and spoke with a bright smile.
16:48Why don't we bring Rowan back?
16:51I'd like her here
16:52to bless us.
16:54He gave her the opening
16:54she needed.
16:55Sigrid's face shifted.
16:56I'll go.
16:57I won't be long.
17:00He went to retrieve me,
17:01but the warden of the hall
17:02stopped him cold.
17:04Rowan has already endured
17:05all four trials
17:06as a corrupted soul
17:07and entered the cycle
17:08of Yggdrasil.
17:11Sigrid could not believe it,
17:12but when the warden
17:13summoned the vision
17:14from an hour prior,
17:15all the color drained
17:16from his face.
17:16Because I had truly
17:17stepped into the cycle
17:18and I had not looked back.
17:20Not once.
17:21A sharp pain
17:22struck him in the chest.
17:23He stood there,
17:24stunned,
17:25something nameless
17:25and bitter rising through him.
17:27Sorin,
17:28tired of waiting,
17:29came after him.
17:29She took one look
17:30at his hollowed expression
17:31and reached out
17:32to tug at his sleeve,
17:33barely masking her impatience.
17:36Sigrid,
17:36the ceremony is about to begin.
17:38Let's go back.
17:39She had no interest
17:40in where Rowan had gone.
17:41All she knew
17:42was that if she didn't hold on
17:43to what was in front of her
17:44right now,
17:44she would never have
17:45another chance.
17:46But Sigrid,
17:47who had always been
17:47so tender with her,
17:48wrenched her arm free
17:49without a word
17:50and flew toward the gate
17:51of the cycle.
17:52Sigrid!
17:52Sorin screamed after him,
17:54but he didn't turn back.
17:55Her expression darkened.
17:56She almost followed,
17:58then stopped herself.
17:59The memories she carried
18:00from Midgard
18:01were not ones
18:01she wanted to revisit.
18:02She bit her lip
18:03and sent a spirit messenger
18:04to bring him back.
18:07The memories she carried
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