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Rooster S01E03

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00:24So, uh, what did you do with your last night in Florida?
00:28It was awesome sauce. My boys gave me a little bit of a send-off, because I'm not going to
00:33be back till Christmas.
00:34Your boys?
00:34No.
00:35Who are your boys?
00:36You know, my boys. Sam, Cliff, Norm.
00:40So, the cast of Cheers.
00:42I did not know you'd do that show.
00:43Was Coach there?
00:45Unfortunately, Coach passed. Season three.
00:47I'm sorry.
00:50Look at this house they're giving me.
00:53Wow.
00:54Oh, a gift basket.
00:55They asked me what your favorite booze was.
00:58Oh!
00:58Thank you, honey.
01:00Didn't buy it. Just replied to a text.
01:02Well, you remembered.
01:04Oh.
01:06This place is way too big for one person.
01:08I'm not moving in with you, Dad.
01:09I wasn't thinking that.
01:10Yes, you were.
01:11Yes, I was.
01:12We'd have so much fun!
01:14Oh, I like this.
01:16Mmm.
01:16What do you think?
01:17Yeah.
01:18Could I wear this under a blazer?
01:19Never do that.
01:20No?
01:20Um, Dad, we have to talk about something.
01:23Oh!
01:25Dill pickle flavored corn nuts?
01:27Is that regional?
01:28I don't know.
01:30Ooh!
01:32It's taken me a while to get out of Mom's shadow.
01:35And you're here now.
01:38Mm-hmm.
01:38Which I've decided is great.
01:41Oh, that took a nice turn.
01:42I've been trying to get you out of your rut since you and Mom split up.
01:45And this is definitely that.
01:47But with my marriage collapsing and my suspension, I can really take care of myself.
01:54So if I feel like I need to take care of you, we need to give each other some space,
02:00you know?
02:00Mm-hmm.
02:01Jesus Christ, just eat them.
02:03Sorry.
02:04They taste like crunchy pickles.
02:05Mm-hmm.
02:08Mmm.
02:10Okay.
02:10Okay.
02:11Um, I have my own life.
02:13One more.
02:17As you were saying.
02:18Okay.
02:19Um, I have my own life here.
02:21Mm-hmm.
02:21I can't have you holding my hand.
02:23Got it.
02:24You can fight your own battles.
02:25And if you can't fight them by yourself, we will fight them together, hand in hand.
02:29It was a joke.
02:30Yeah.
02:30I'm leaving now.
02:31And I'm taking the Toblerone.
02:33And honey, thank you for this.
02:36Also, I wasn't serious about living together.
02:38Oh, really?
02:39I was just thinking how the dead hockey coach's house is kind of lonely and it might be fun to
02:43crash here for a couple of weeks.
02:44Do it!
02:45Order pizza!
02:46I will get a...
02:47Oh, that was not nice.
02:49That was not a nice thing to do.
02:50I love you, too.
02:51Oh, I, oh, I, oh, I, I played before.
02:59I laugh at me, I'm trying, trying.
03:04Falling sometimes, sometimes flying.
03:08Cry me in, I'll shine up, white liners.
03:12Crawl, crawl, crawl.
03:15Oh, oh, oh.
03:40Oh, hey, hey, new neighbor.
03:43So weird.
03:44Remember, your friend was supposed to live in this house.
03:46I remember.
03:48Calm down.
03:49I'm not mad at you.
03:50Thanks, God.
03:53Oh, can I walk with you?
03:55Got the first day jitters and I don't know where anything is.
03:58Come on.
04:01What's up with the shoes?
04:02You going to prom?
04:03Oh, I knew they were too shiny.
04:05You okay?
04:06Yep, I'm good.
04:07Okay.
04:08Hey, you got a minute to help me with something?
04:10Yeah, of course.
04:11You name it.
04:12Okay.
04:12Ooh, that is cool.
04:14You should get one.
04:16I need to lock in my summer internship.
04:18I don't think you know how much I'm freaking out.
04:20I mean, you don't exactly sound so freaked out.
04:22Why don't you give me something with a little gusto?
04:23How are you feeling?
04:24I'm not sleeping at all.
04:26You're stressed.
04:27Guys, guys, guys, guys, guys, please.
04:28I'm trying to work on my book here.
04:30Oh, my God.
04:31I am so sorry for talking in my own apartment.
04:35I hate him.
04:36We will keep it down.
04:38I need an advisor with Paul.
04:39I should just ask President Mann.
04:41He's at the gym all the time.
04:42Right.
04:43Oh, you and Walt.
04:44That's really not ideal for me.
04:46Ideal for you?
04:48Yeah.
04:49Permission to be frank.
04:50Break up.
04:51Let's wrap this up.
04:52Go home.
04:53It's just that I have been in the spotlight quite a lot lately,
04:56and I think maybe in lieu of drawing more attention to us,
04:58she just rolled her eyes at me saying in lieu.
05:00Educated people say in lieu, Mo.
05:04My editor is calling me every single day,
05:07asking to see new pages on this.
05:08This book is not just for me.
05:10It's for our child's future, all right?
05:11So I think it would behoove us to create conditions
05:14under which I can succeed.
05:16Walt, he is, like, the biggest gossip on campus, all right?
05:19And the last thing that we need is that man
05:21rooting around in our lives.
05:24Okay, fine.
05:26I won't ask him.
05:31So you think it's okay to just hire him,
05:33even though you already promised the writer-in-residence gig
05:36to my friend Ruby?
05:37If this is what you meant by helping, I don't love it.
05:39Hiring Greg was a once-in-a-lifetime opportunity.
05:41Your friend can do it next semester.
05:43Maybe that'll give her time to write something someone's heard of.
05:45Ruby won the Bailey Gifford Prize in nonfiction.
05:48We all have our resumes.
05:49Look, Walt said that I had to take the job
05:53or Katie was gonna lose hers.
05:54And I would appreciate it if we'd just keep that between us.
05:57Because Katie would kill me.
05:58Of course.
05:58Better watch your back, Greg,
06:00because he might stab you in it.
06:01You understand, this isn't even about her friend.
06:03This is about the review.
06:05I don't know what the review is.
06:07That is a shitty thing to say.
06:08That I take it back, I do.
06:10We're supposed to be friends, Walt.
06:11And you just tossed it aside.
06:13You need to handle your job
06:14with a little more grace and sensitivity.
06:16Do you know why I am so deeply drawn to Greg?
06:19You don't...
06:20That's not necessary.
06:21Because he is the only one around here
06:23who doesn't actually want something from me.
06:27It's a teeny tiny violin.
06:28I was gonna ask what that was.
06:30It is really small.
06:31If you would excuse us,
06:32I have to help Greg find his new office.
06:35Come this way.
06:36Bye-bye.
06:41And here we are.
06:43I think I could have found this on my own.
06:45Do I need to apologize to Dylan?
06:46Oh, we did nothing wrong.
06:47She should be apologizing to us.
06:49Let me show you my favorite part of this whole setup.
06:54Do you love it as much as I do?
06:56So your office is connected to my...
06:58You can come by and say hi any time.
07:01That'll be fun.
07:02We got a hockey game tomorrow night.
07:04Hired a new coach.
07:04Care to come?
07:05I'm not really a hockey guy.
07:07I wish that you had told me
07:09that I was taking Dylan's friend's job.
07:11I bet Dylan's friend.
07:12Wish we told her as well.
07:13Crystal!
07:14Emailed her and sent a box of pairs.
07:16Gym bag?
07:18Oh, shower shoes.
07:22Door open or closed?
07:23Uh, open.
07:24It's fine.
07:24Thanks.
07:25Good choice.
07:32Wouldn't you know it?
07:33Those rascals were in my bag the whole time.
07:35I'll be back in a jiff.
07:36Okay.
07:39See you soon.
07:42Why are you making me do this?
07:44This is like a labor camp.
07:45This is hell.
07:46You're fine.
07:47I'm not.
07:47Believe me.
07:49Be right back.
07:50Uh, Dean Riggs, I'm Sonny Sulewski.
07:53I'm in your evolutionary bio class,
07:55and I would like for you to be my advisor.
07:56Whoa, buy me a drink first.
07:58I'm looking for an internship in biotech
08:01with a focus on health and wellness.
08:02Look, you seem like a beautiful young scientist,
08:05but I can't.
08:06I'd explain further,
08:07but I've been told not to by my attorney.
08:10Good luck.
08:13Smoke break.
08:14You earned it.
08:15Young lady, if I may,
08:17don't pick your advisor
08:18based on what you think they can do for you.
08:21It should be someone with whom you have a real connection.
08:25Thank you, sir.
08:27Onward.
08:29No, I should have just asked him.
08:31I mean, he was already advising me.
08:32No, no, no, darling, no, no, no.
08:33He was eavesdropping
08:35and inserting himself into your conversation.
08:36That is just what Walt does, trust me.
08:38Look, okay, once,
08:40totally offhand, right,
08:41I mentioned to Crystal
08:42that I might someday want to have a dog.
08:45Next thing I knew,
08:46Walt is in my living room with Roscoe.
08:49He'd already called him Roscoe.
08:50I wouldn't call him Roscoe.
08:52I would have called him something more whimsical,
08:53like Giuseppe.
08:55Okay, don't pretend you're not in love with that dog.
08:56I've seen you open-mouthed kissing him.
08:58He prefers it that way.
09:00He's Italian.
09:01Look, Riggs loves me.
09:03I'll speak to him.
09:04I'll get him to change his mind.
09:04What are you doing?
09:05I am texting you a study
09:06on the fecal matter in dogs' mouths.
09:10You shan't be reading that.
09:11Okay, so you can use these notes
09:13on The Impressionist as a general guide.
09:15I'm sorry about the pizza sauce.
09:17I had a pretty late night.
09:18Have you ever seen Rick and Morty?
09:21Respecting boundaries by knocking.
09:25Hi, hi, hi, hi, hi.
09:26I just wanted to check to see
09:28if you looked at that lesson plan that I emailed.
09:30Uh, hi, oh, I'm sorry.
09:32Am I interrupting?
09:33100%.
09:33Um, this is Lily, my TA.
09:35She smokes.
09:36Yes, I love it.
09:37Yay.
09:38Yay.
09:38I'm just prepping her to cover my classes.
09:40Oh, okay.
09:41I can wait.
09:42Uh, but what time is her class?
09:44Because mine starts in 25 minutes.
09:46Okay, fine.
09:48Um, you know, I did take a look,
09:49and this is way overscheduled.
09:51This is giving me flashbacks
09:53to when you were coaching my U8 soccer team,
09:55and you had that big binder of plays.
09:56Yeah?
09:57Oh, yeah, you've got to relax.
09:59Okay, all right.
10:00Okay, do you remember
10:01when you finally said screw it,
10:02and you told us to just
10:04kick the ball around and have fun?
10:05Yeah, I remember that.
10:06Right, that was the first game that we won.
10:08Well, the other team's goalie
10:10was like four years old.
10:11Honey, honey, I get very nervous
10:13speaking in front of people
10:14unless I have a plan,
10:15and I am not a rock star teacher
10:16like you are.
10:18At the moment,
10:18I'm not any kind of teacher.
10:20Okay.
10:21You know what would cheer you up?
10:23There's a hockey game tomorrow night.
10:24You want to go together
10:25like we used to?
10:26Sure, Dad.
10:27Are you...
10:28Really?
10:29Whatever.
10:29I did not expect that answer.
10:31Okay, I have to get to class.
10:33Okay.
10:33I love you.
10:34Lily, do not smoke.
10:35It's not good for you.
10:36Yes.
10:42Yeah.
10:44That's a cool shortcut.
10:58That's a dangerous shortcut.
11:00Okay.
11:03Hello.
11:04Hello, everybody.
11:05Woof.
11:06You look like Stonehill got you.
11:07Yeah.
11:08New shoes.
11:09And I forgot to scuff up the bottom, so...
11:11No biggie.
11:11Your leg is bleeding.
11:12Yeah, it doesn't hurt, though.
11:15Okay.
11:15So, I'm not sure how many of you
11:18are familiar with my work.
11:20Oh, Miami Amore.
11:22That's a crowd pleaser.
11:23But I doubt that any of my books
11:25are on the shelves
11:26of this hallowed institution.
11:28They aren't.
11:28Oh, hey.
11:29I recognize you.
11:32Okay.
11:33They are called beach reads.
11:36And yes,
11:37you can usually find them
11:38at the airport.
11:39But if you pick a good one,
11:41you can't put it down.
11:44Welcome to the art of the page-turner.
11:46Let's fucking go!
11:47Oh, yeah.
11:48Okay, so,
11:49I'm gonna start...
11:50I'm gonna talk about
11:51some of the authors
11:52who made me want to tell stories.
11:54People like Greg McDonald
11:56or Sue Grafton
11:57or Carl Hyasson.
11:59Mine was Zadie Smith.
12:00Yes.
12:01Absolutely love him.
12:03Or her.
12:06Or they.
12:08I know it's a little uptight here,
12:10so I would like you
12:12to call me Greg.
12:16You're all Gerg, bro.
12:17Hmm?
12:17The whiteboard.
12:18You're all Gerg.
12:20And that's a permanent mark.
12:21I was gonna say Gerg all year.
12:22Mr. Russo?
12:23Yes.
12:24Question here.
12:25Is this supposed to be you?
12:26Because if so, dude,
12:28nice washboard.
12:29No, no, no.
12:29That is not me.
12:30I have absolutely nothing
12:31to do with the artwork.
12:32I read that you get approval
12:34on all your cover art.
12:35Did you, Ronnie?
12:36You read that?
12:36Mm-hmm.
12:37Okay.
12:38You know, I, uh,
12:40I emailed you all a syllabus
12:41and a breakdown
12:43of how every class
12:44is going to go
12:45minute by minute.
12:46Oh, man.
12:47You made this sound like fun, man.
12:48This is not fun.
12:49I don't know any of these authors.
12:51I'm not sure if this literature
12:53will speak to me.
12:55Oh, just you wait, Ronnie.
12:57You are going to be
12:59my white whale.
13:01At this institution,
13:02we have zero tolerance
13:04for body shaming.
13:05Believe me,
13:06I was not shaming her.
13:08I was referencing
13:09a very famous book
13:10that I have not read.
13:12Maybe do.
13:12And besides,
13:13it doesn't really
13:14even make any sense.
13:16Ronnie has a,
13:17a lovely figure.
13:18No, no, nope.
13:20Nope, nope.
13:21If I may,
13:22life's complicated.
13:24We all mess up.
13:25We mess up at our jobs,
13:26mess up at our relationships.
13:28But aren't we all
13:30trying our best
13:31to navigate
13:32the complexities
13:33of this life?
13:35The slings and arrows
13:35of outrageous fortune.
13:37That's Hamlet, Greg.
13:39Personally,
13:39I think that the quickest route
13:41back to forgiveness
13:42is if we accept the fact
13:44that in our cause,
13:46we're just good people.
13:48You are a bad person,
13:50and I hate you.
13:51I'm fine here
13:52with a verbal warning.
13:53Oh, thank God.
13:54Walk with me,
13:55Mr. Russo.
13:57You're a bad boy.
14:06Ten years ago,
14:07the school didn't even
14:08have a disciplinary board.
14:10It's a real gotcha culture now.
14:12The last thing I'd want to do
14:13is make a young woman
14:13uncomfortable.
14:14Same.
14:15Yet we both keep doing it.
14:16Yeah.
14:17What?
14:18So how are you getting on here?
14:20You finding your bearings?
14:21Not even close, no.
14:23I'll tell you what, Greg.
14:25Come by my place tonight.
14:26I'll give you the lay of the land.
14:28We can have a drink on the porch.
14:30I cannot tell you
14:31how much I would love to do that.
14:32I have a great bottle of whiskey.
14:33Porch whiskey it is.
14:35Look forward to it.
14:38Okay.
14:39See you then.
14:40Not your voice,
14:41not your milk,
14:42not your own voice,
14:44not your milk,
14:45not your own voice,
14:45not your own voice,
14:45What is all this?
14:48They double booked
14:48the free speech zone.
14:49So on this side,
14:50we have vegans,
14:51and on this side,
14:51we have gun control.
14:52What side are you on?
14:53I haven't really decided yet,
14:54because on the one hand,
14:55I do want jackfruit tacos
14:56in the caf,
14:57but I also don't love
14:58the idea of getting shot.
14:59Tough call.
15:01The free speech zone
15:01was over by Cabot Hall.
15:03Why is it outside my office now?
15:05I guess someone
15:05must have moved it.
15:06I don't know.
15:08I don't know.
15:08I don't know.
15:09I just wanted to say
15:10thank you again
15:10for taking on, Sonny.
15:11An 86,
15:12Malik Volney.
15:14You must love
15:15your mistress very much.
15:17Well,
15:17we need to talk.
15:19I'm being summoned.
15:21Just give me a minute.
15:22Did you move
15:24the free speech zone
15:25outside my office?
15:26You should thank me.
15:27I usually do more
15:29when people complain
15:29about me to Walt.
15:31Oh, my God.
15:31Are you that petty?
15:33I'm going to answer
15:34your question
15:35with another question.
15:36Yes?
15:42Would you give me
15:43that water, please?
15:44No.
15:46You pompous prick.
15:49You are a walking
15:50relic of the past.
15:52And nobody's
15:52going to miss you
15:53when you're gone.
15:53Are you trying to be funny?
15:54Don't you slide
15:55out of your chair.
15:56What are you doing?
15:58Rick!
15:59Call 911.
16:00What?
16:01Crystal!
16:02Oh, my God.
16:03God, why do bad things
16:04keep happening to me?
16:10Hello.
16:11Yes, I'm just calling
16:11from Ludlow College.
16:13There's a man
16:14who I think
16:14has maybe fainted.
16:16Well, I'm not a doctor,
16:17but isn't it great?
16:27It's bad.
16:28You drive.
16:35It was a heart attack.
16:37Susan says
16:38he will pull through.
16:40Luckily,
16:40she has a friend
16:41over there with her.
16:42Good, good.
16:43Did they say
16:43if a sip of water
16:44would have made a difference?
16:45What?
16:46I've already taken care
16:47of his classes for the week,
16:48but we need an interim
16:49dean of faculty.
16:50Okay.
16:50Today.
16:51Check.
16:51Then don't dilly-dally do it.
16:52You're the one
16:53who's preventing me
16:54from doing what
16:54you want me to do.
16:55Fine.
16:56The show must go on.
16:58Position's yours.
16:59No.
17:00You'll do great.
17:00Congrats, Dylan.
17:01No, no, no, no.
17:02I'm not it.
17:02No, thank you.
17:03Well, it's a rule
17:04that goes back
17:04to gladiator times.
17:05You kill a man,
17:06you get his job.
17:07I did not kill him.
17:08Well, the paramedic
17:09said he was dead
17:10for three minutes
17:10and you said
17:11that water thing
17:11that was suspicious.
17:12Plus, you can show me
17:14how to do it all
17:14with grace and sensitivity.
17:16Huh.
17:16I see what you're doing.
17:19Fine.
17:20I'm in.
17:21Congrats again, Dylan.
17:22Appreciate you.
17:23That's the spirit.
17:24The man's an ox.
17:25He'll be back
17:26before you know it.
17:32Have you ever seen
17:33him look so peaceful?
17:36No.
17:37He really valued
17:38your friendship.
17:40Yeah.
17:43V-Riggs.
17:44He's the best.
17:47I should go.
17:49No, please stay.
17:50Stay for Vincent.
17:52Vincent.
17:53Dean Riggs,
17:55who I call Vincent
17:56because he is my friend.
17:59You know,
18:00he could sense
18:01that I was feeling
18:02a little lost.
18:04Then he reached out to me.
18:07Do you want to hold
18:08his other hand?
18:10Okay.
18:20Are we able to close your eyes
18:21and picture something?
18:23Go ahead.
18:23Close your eyes.
18:24Close your eyes.
18:24The year is 1929.
18:26Are your eyes closed?
18:27Yeah, they're closed.
18:28Stalin,
18:28he's become this kind of,
18:30this myth.
18:32Like the tooth fairy.
18:34If the tooth fairy
18:35had lent several
18:35violent purges.
18:39Stalin's cult of personality
18:41was equal parts
18:42power
18:43and equal parts
18:44fear.
18:45Fear?
18:47Oh, gosh.
18:48I'm so sorry.
18:49Oh, gosh.
18:50I hear it.
18:50I'm sorry.
18:51I hear you.
18:52Not, no.
18:53I'm sorry.
18:56It'll probably go faster
18:57without all those loop-de-doos.
18:59Professor Shepard.
19:00Thanks.
19:01I hear it's Dean Shepard now.
19:02Congratulations.
19:03Yes, thank you.
19:03You're welcome.
19:04I recently submitted
19:05a proposal for my
19:06new philosophy curriculum.
19:08Weeks ago, actually.
19:09So I'm going to need
19:10to hear back
19:10like ASAP, please.
19:11Wow.
19:12A philosophy emergency.
19:13Don't get those a lot.
19:15I do.
19:16Let's give Dean Shepard
19:17a few days
19:18to get her feet wet.
19:19Teaching young people
19:19how to think.
19:20I could use that power
19:21for good
19:21or I could use it
19:22for something not good.
19:24They all want something,
19:25so never give anyone
19:26your time
19:26unless it's an emergency.
19:27Mm-hmm.
19:29Hi, what's up, doc?
19:30No, what?
19:31Uh, sorry.
19:32I, is it, I'm, uh, I,
19:34I, I know I burned
19:35a house down.
19:36Ah, but if I don't have work
19:39and I'm sitting at home,
19:39my mind is going
19:40to some dark and crazy places.
19:41You threatening
19:42to strike again?
19:43No, no, no.
19:45No.
19:46I should give her some time.
19:47Yeah, I think that would be best.
19:48Let's go to my office.
19:49I'd love to.
19:50Okay.
19:51Let's party.
19:53And done.
19:59I let you sleep.
20:02You looked almost beautiful.
20:04Is it morning?
20:06Oh, no, no, I'm late.
20:08I'm late.
20:09Ah!
20:10Ow!
20:12I told myself I came to campus today
20:14because I missed being here,
20:16but I came to watch Arch teaching.
20:19Sorry, I don't know
20:20why I'm telling you this.
20:21We don't even know
20:21each other that well.
20:22It's okay.
20:23Part of my job.
20:24Really?
20:24I don't know.
20:25I met Archie two weeks
20:26after I started teaching here.
20:29I don't really have friends of my own.
20:31Your dad's here now.
20:32He could be your friend.
20:33Nope.
20:33I heard it.
20:34My bad.
20:35I think I just need a win.
20:37So, is there any chance
20:39that you would lift my suspension?
20:41Again, don't know how my job works,
20:43but I'll try.
20:47He should have seen him today in class.
20:49Bouncing around all happy.
20:52Why isn't he struggling like I am?
21:03Hello, you.
21:04Hi.
21:04Are you okay?
21:05Yeah.
21:06I was just looking at some
21:07old photos of Roscoe.
21:09Thought you were going to give that to Riggs.
21:11Sadly, I never got the chance.
21:14Well, I need an advisor
21:15who can breathe on his own.
21:16So, I made a list of potential candidates
21:18and factored in their professional connections
21:21relative to how likely they are to die.
21:24I crossed off two fatties and a smoker.
21:26That's quite morbid.
21:27I mean, it's only October, Sonny.
21:29What's the rush?
21:30What's the rush?
21:31I've got a blueberry inside of me
21:33that's going to grow to the size
21:34of a fucking watermelon,
21:35so it would behoove me
21:36to lock in an internship
21:37before I start showing
21:38seeing as very few biotech companies
21:39want someone knocking over beakers
21:41with a baby bump.
21:42Well, hey.
21:44They can't actually discriminate
21:45against you for that.
21:46That is illegal.
21:47Great.
21:47I'll make a thousand citizens arrests.
21:50You can go back to jacking off
21:52to pictures of your gassy dog.
22:08Hold on, hold on, hold on.
22:09I'm here.
22:10Oh, no.
22:10Sit down, sit down, sit down.
22:11We're still having class.
22:12I don't have my lesson plan.
22:15Could someone go online
22:16and check the syllabus?
22:18It is 1046.
22:20What does it say
22:20we should be doing right now?
22:21Five minutes of spirited discussion.
22:23Okay.
22:24Does it say about what?
22:26Uh, reflections
22:27on what we've discussed so far.
22:32You know what?
22:33Screw it.
22:35Let's just kick the ball around
22:37a little bit.
22:38Have some fun.
22:38No one knows what that means.
22:40It is another metaphor.
22:41Ronnie, not unlike White Whale,
22:44which I am saying directed at no one.
22:46All right, here's the deal.
22:48I didn't take many writing courses in college,
22:52partly because I didn't go to college.
22:54Nice.
22:54I have written 11 bestsellers,
22:57and the idea of teaching here is terrifying.
23:02All of you scare me, except Spooner.
23:05I got you, Greg.
23:07But you know what?
23:07I think we have some things in common.
23:09We all love to tell stories.
23:12Why?
23:13Why do we want to write?
23:19Okay.
23:20I thought that all that vulnerability
23:22might sort of loosen the jar,
23:25but I will go first.
23:26Um,
23:28the best thing about the Rooster books
23:31is that he gets to do everything
23:34I wish I could.
23:36Get in a bar fight
23:37or break the girl's heart.
23:40Honestly, I write because sometimes
23:42I wish I was someone else.
23:49When I used to write in high school,
23:50it was like the only time I felt smart.
23:53Thank you, Tommy.
23:54Anybody else?
23:55Uh, I started writing
23:57after my parents got divorced.
23:58Okay.
23:59Now I write a lot of sad stories
24:01about horses who love their kids.
24:03Beautiful!
24:03That's great creativity, Maya!
24:08I am so, so sorry.
24:10I blame the shoes.
24:13I actually got rid of them.
24:15Good.
24:15They were too shiny.
24:16No.
24:17I've never run one of these things,
24:18so what happens next?
24:20We have to go through the complaint.
24:22Okay?
24:22It says there you closed your hand
24:24firmly around her breast.
24:26Mm.
24:28Uh, I think firmly is an exaggeration.
24:31It was more of a soft and gentle cupping.
24:36Why did I put it like that?
24:39Miss Samuels acknowledges it was an accident.
24:43Yeah.
24:44I was bracing my fall,
24:45and her breasts happened to take the brace.
24:48Okay.
24:49Don't do it again.
24:51I'm out.
24:53Thank you, everybody.
24:54Appreciate it.
25:01Walter.
25:02Hello, hi.
25:03Sorry, have you got a moment?
25:04Do you have anything problematic in your life
25:05you still have a soft spot for?
25:07Uh, Michael Jackson, Woody Allen, plastic straws.
25:11It'd probably be Roald Dahl for me.
25:13Not great with our Jewish friends,
25:14but, I mean, Matilda the Musical.
25:16Oh, come on.
25:18Listen, I know that you only take on advisees
25:19if you feel that you have a particular sort of connection.
25:22If you just...
25:22Uh, Sonny, could I borrow you for a second, please?
25:25Sonny here is a fantastic neuroscience candidate,
25:28centering particularly on physical fitness and well-being.
25:30Two fiery passions of yours, if I'm not mistaken.
25:33I mean, Hal, listen, you know,
25:34you could take your advisory sessions in the sauna, you know?
25:38Aren't you pregnant?
25:39In Nordic countries, it's actually routine throughout pregnancy.
25:41And worst-case scenario, we just keep the temp below 170.
25:44You know, I always see you with a protein drink,
25:46and I, uh, make my own.
25:48If you...
25:50You'll taste pea proteins and a little bit of dehydrated cherry
25:53for flavors and antioxidants.
25:55That's incredible.
25:57I'll leave you to...
26:01You sure you're okay with me having a front-row seat
26:04to your interpersonal drama?
26:06I would actually love a third-party POV.
26:08Oh, I think we could have a great deal of fun with this.
26:15Don't be afraid to move it!
26:17Don't be afraid to move it!
26:23Oh, um, sorry.
26:27Hi, Dad.
26:28Hey, where are you?
26:29You need to get down here.
26:31The new coach is drinking a beer,
26:32and during the last time out,
26:34he was singing Sweet Caroline to nobody.
26:37I actually ended up going out with Lily and some of her friends.
26:40So you're not coming?
26:42Oh, shoot.
26:43Well, I was excited to tell you about class.
26:46I tried that thing of yours,
26:48you know, the kicking the ball around.
26:49That's so great.
26:50Can I call you back?
26:51I'm actually having kind of a fun time.
26:53Sure.
26:54I'll just watch the game by myself.
26:56Maybe there's a daughter here without a dad.
26:58Please don't make me feel guilty for not hanging out with you.
27:01You took this job without asking how I felt about it.
27:03You did that for you.
27:05Yeah.
27:06I did that for me.
27:07I am a selfish guy.
27:09Selfish Greg.
27:11Well, have fun with Lily.
27:12And, honey, remember what they say about secondhand smoke.
27:15It's even worse than firsthand smoke.
27:16Okay.
27:17Love you.
27:20Here we go, Blue.
27:21Peluso, come here.
27:24Ah, finally a friendly face.
27:27Speaking of friendly faces,
27:28who's that happy fella?
27:30Oh, this is my jersey
27:31from when I played minor league hockey
27:33with the Ontario Indians.
27:35Ooh, ooh, ooh.
27:36Chief love hockey.
27:38Oh, my God.
27:39I have to take this off, don't I?
27:41I would.
27:42Oh, okay.
27:44Oh, my God.
27:45How hard is it for you
27:46to stop offending people?
27:49It's harder than you think.
27:52There we go.
27:53You can still see the feathers, damn it.
27:56Ten minutes ago,
27:57I was in my bed,
27:58in my bun with my tea.
28:00And then I get a call
28:02saying that as part of my new job
28:04that I got to drive down here
28:05and reprimand our drunk hockey coach.
28:08He might not be drunk,
28:09but he is definitely buzz.
28:11Come here, real quick.
28:12I got to tell you something.
28:15Be better.
28:16Be better.
28:18He's drunk.
28:18I don't want to police him.
28:20I don't want to police you.
28:21I am begging you.
28:23Please.
28:24We can't do your shit together.
28:25I'm trying.
28:27There's just nothing here makes sense.
28:29My daughter doesn't want me to be around,
28:31and I keep falling down hills.
28:33Walt's assistant is creeping me out.
28:36I don't have time for this.
28:37No, because you are busy,
28:39and I envy you for that.
28:41I have so much time on my hands
28:43that I got to read that book
28:45that your friend Ruby wrote,
28:46and it is not my thing, honey.
28:49Don't snap, Greg.
28:50Ah.
28:51You know, everybody says college
28:52is the best time of your life,
28:54but I think it sinks.
28:57I want to go home.
29:00You sound like a college freshman.
29:02Oh, yeah.
29:04But you're not.
29:06You're 60.
29:08You want to go?
29:11Go.
29:12I'm 57.
29:14And you're me.
29:17Come on.
29:19Oh, yeah.
29:21Hey, ah.
29:23Sweet Caroline.
29:26Bah, bah, bah.
29:27Good times never seem so good.
29:31So good.
29:32Everybody.
29:32So good.
29:33So good.
29:34Ah, you guys fucking suck balls.
29:40Oh, fuck.
29:41Who cares?
29:42Play on.
29:44Now I look at the night
29:51And it don't seem so lonely
29:54We fill it up with only two
30:02And when I hurt
30:06Hurting runs off my shoulders
30:09How can I hurt when holding you
30:17One
30:21Touching more
30:25Reach it out
30:27Touching me
30:31Touching you
30:35Sweet Caroline
30:40The times never seem so good
30:47I've been inclined
30:51To believe
30:53To believe
30:53They're never
30:54Ah
30:55Ha ha ha ha
30:56Bah, bah
30:57Oh
30:58Oh
30:59Oh
31:00Oh
31:02Oh
31:03Oh
31:03Oh
31:04Oh
31:04Oh
31:04Oh
31:04Oh
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