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00:06Previously on The Summer I Turned Pretty, my family's been going to Susannah's Beach House
00:10and Cousins every summer since I was a baby. Look who came back all grown up. Susannah told me that
00:16when I was born she knew I was destined for one of her boys. I always hoped it would be
00:20Conrad.
00:21I wrangled Belly an invitation to be a debutante. Now, which one of you is gonna be Belly's escort
00:26to the ball. Uh, so are you and Jeremiah like a thing? They're like basically related. I'm not
00:33going with either of you. I am going to find my own date. I don't know what to think about
00:36you this
00:36summer. You have new friends, you have a boyfriend. I don't even know who you are anymore. Is that why
00:41you threw yourself at my brother so that you could get back at me? My heart's beating really fast. You're
00:45having a panic attack. It's my mom. I know you said you didn't want to do chemo, but I'm not
00:50putting
00:50myself through treatment again. I'm gonna tell the kids when we get back to Boston. Why are you acting
00:55so different? I mean, something's going on. Just tell me. Belly, I think about you. I do. You know
01:00I do. I just can't. You're my best friend. Three times I wanted to be more. I was just waiting.
01:06I mean,
01:06how am I supposed to fully jump into something with Jeremiah if a piece of my heart still beats
01:11for his brother? Will you go with me to the temple? Hey, does my mom seem okay to you? I
01:17heard your
01:17parents talk about it, and your mom seemed really upset. Hey, have you guys seen Jeremiah?
01:27Colorado, we need to talk, all right? It's important. It's about mom. You've known this whole
01:30fucking time you didn't tell me. I told them I'd do the trial. It's going to work. Belly, I'm sorry
01:36for being so shitty all of a sudden. I mean, you were going through all this alone. I wish you
01:41had told me
01:41so you didn't have to. No matter what happens next, I will always come back to this place
01:46and these people.
01:59You live in my dream step
02:01I look at my fantasy
02:05I stay in reality
02:08You live in my dream step
02:112020, 2020, 2020
02:13vision
02:13Cupid hit me, Cupid hit me with precision
02:17You're back
02:18I'm back
02:22I said I'm sicka, sicka, sicka, sicka, sicka
02:25They get it. You guys are into each other
02:29Don't listen to him
02:30You two are perfect together
02:43I don't know
02:44if I'm gonna see you again
02:48I wasn't in Cousins.
02:51Conrad and I weren't together.
02:53And Susanna was dead.
02:55Nothing would ever be the same again.
02:57Hey, you dropped this.
03:02Conklin.
03:03What?
03:04I said you dropped this, Conklin.
03:06You're reading The Hunger Games in French.
03:10Trying to.
03:11I almost know the English version by heart,
03:13so it's not that difficult to follow.
03:16Very cool.
03:18Thanks.
03:21Escaping to your dreams is easier than living with your memories.
03:25It's the being awake that's the hard part.
03:36This almost doesn't feel real.
03:40How about now?
03:48I can't stop smiling.
03:52You know, you have the prettiest smile I've ever seen.
03:55Your whole face just lights up.
03:58I wanted to say that to you all soon.
04:04Uh, there's something that I need to tell you.
04:11I don't even know how, um...
04:13Okay.
04:14What is it?
04:16You figured out?
04:20I, um...
04:22A few days ago,
04:24Jeremiah told me what she owns for me.
04:32Oh.
04:34Wow, okay.
04:37So what did you say?
04:41I kissed him a few times.
04:53So, um...
04:57So when we both came to pick you and Taylor up from the side of the road,
05:00you know, and you went with Jay,
05:02were you two already...
05:04Yeah.
05:07You know, but there were moments this summer
05:09where I thought maybe there could be something with you and me,
05:11and then, you know, you'd shut down and get really cold.
05:15And I get it.
05:15I get it.
05:15I'm sorry.
05:16I'm sorry.
05:17No.
05:17It's all my fault.
05:18I know.
05:20I mean, it's mine too.
05:26Do you want to be with him?
05:30Being with you is all I've ever wanted.
05:32Okay.
05:33That's great.
05:34Be with me then.
05:35What?
05:37What?
05:37Is that funny?
05:38No.
05:39I'm sorry.
05:39It's just weird.
05:40I mean, everyone in our house knows that I've had a crush on you
05:44ever since, like...
05:45Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait.
05:45Hey, you have a crush on me?
05:47Oh, I'm set up.
05:49Yeah.
05:53You're good for me, Billy.
05:58I don't want to hurt Jay.
05:59Me neither.
06:01Look, I'll talk to him.
06:03He might not even be that upset, you know?
06:05It's Jay.
06:06He never takes anything too seriously.
06:07It's not...
06:10It's not like how it is with us.
06:15Um, I'll talk to him first.
06:17I owe him that.
06:19Okay.
06:28Shh.
06:29Somebody sit down.
06:41Early morning walk on the beach?
06:44Um...
06:45Yeah.
06:46Mm-hmm.
06:51I knew it.
06:53I knew it.
06:57I'm gonna go...
07:00Here you go.
07:01Okay.
07:06Sit down.
07:09So?
07:11Mom, just let me change first.
07:17All right.
07:18Enjoy your summer.
07:19All right.
07:20Enjoy your summer.
07:21All right.
07:28No, but seriously, it's gonna be wild.
07:30It's the best team we've had in years.
07:31Oh, I made us these matching crop tops.
07:33They're pink, obviously.
07:34And I got a bunch of new knee pads.
07:35Ooh, knee pads, Taylor.
07:37Shut up.
07:38Hey, Bells.
07:39Oh, my God.
07:40It's not too late to sign up for volleyball camp, you know?
07:41Woo-hoo-hoo-hoo!
07:43Oh, our school is over, bitches!
07:46Woo-hoo!
07:47It's not just loud, Steven.
07:48Hey, if I were going to Princeton,
07:50I'd be screaming about it, too.
07:52Thank you, Evelyn.
07:53Wait, are you going to Princeton?
07:54That's so cool, I couldn't tell.
07:56Oh, you couldn't tell?
07:57You couldn't...
07:58Yo, yo, yo, yo, yo, yo, yo, yo.
07:59Oh, this bike, what's up, man?
08:01What time is a grab party tomorrow, man?
08:03Oh, the band comes on at 10.
08:04I'm dating the singer.
08:06Uh, yeah, the Machine Gun Kelly wannabe.
08:08I tried to veto him from playing,
08:10but I guess we couldn't find anybody cheaper, huh?
08:12Oh.
08:14Wait, so...
08:15Are you coming to the party?
08:17I don't know.
08:18No.
08:20Belly.
08:21Belly.
08:21Can I talk to you for a minute, please?
08:25Gotta go.
08:27Okay.
08:28See you, Belly.
08:29Bye.
08:29Sorry.
08:31Bye.
08:35Belly.
08:36I was reviewing your end-of-term transcripts,
08:39and I couldn't help but notice
08:40that your grades have taken a serious dive.
08:42I mean, you kept an A in French,
08:44but you won't impress colleges with just French.
08:47Is there something going on?
08:48Uh, there's a death in the family.
08:51Oh.
08:52I'm so sorry to hear that.
08:54But your grades have been dipping all year.
08:56You even got your volleyball captaincy revoked?
08:59Yeah, I...
09:00I choked at regionals.
09:02Okay.
09:02Well, have you, um...
09:04Have you thought about where you're gonna apply next year?
09:06Um, I mean, I know I'm not getting into an IV,
09:08but there's always Penn State.
09:10Well, that might be a reach at this point.
09:12Without volleyball,
09:13you'll have to focus on less competitive schools.
09:15Have you heard about Finch?
09:18Um, yeah, I know someone who's going there in the fall.
09:21A family friend.
09:22Great.
09:23Well, maybe you can visit them and grab a tour.
09:25I doubt it.
09:28Come in.
09:32Good morning, Bells.
09:34Hey.
09:35Come here.
09:41So, I stayed up all night
09:43doing research on the trial my mom agreed to.
09:46And, Belly, I'm feeling really hopeful.
09:49That's...
09:49That's great, Jer.
09:51I mean, I'm so glad that Susanna agreed to do it.
09:54Yeah.
09:54I mean, if I'm being honest,
09:56I'm still kind of pissed Connor
09:57never told me what was going on with her,
09:59but, you know,
10:01at least it worked out, right?
10:03Right.
10:04That's kind of why I think
10:05we should tell
10:07Conrad about us as soon as possible.
10:10I don't want any more secrets,
10:11and plus, Stephen already knows.
10:14Hmm.
10:18Actually, that...
10:19That's what I wanted to talk to you about.
10:23Okay.
10:23See, um...
10:25The thing is, um...
10:27Last night, I really couldn't sleep all night,
10:31so I went to...
10:34watch the sunrise on the beach.
10:37And Conrad was there,
10:39and we just started talking,
10:41and one thing led to another,
10:43and, um, and we...
10:45we kissed.
10:53You kissed my brother.
10:56I'm sorry.
10:57I didn't think that, you know,
10:59like, he...
11:00We...
11:01I mean, we wanted to tell you right away,
11:02so, you know...
11:03You're already a we?
11:04No.
11:05No, no.
11:06I...
11:06I just didn't...
11:07I don't know.
11:08I didn't want it to be weird.
11:09Well, yeah, Billy, it is weird, okay?
11:11No, Cher, please.
11:12No, no, you know what?
11:13Actually, it's cool.
11:14It's cool.
11:15I get it.
11:15You know, I was just a distraction
11:17to keep you busy while you waited for Conrad.
11:19I'm glad it finally happened for you, Billy.
11:22It's great timing.
11:23It's not like my mom has cancer or anything.
11:24Cher, I didn't want to hurt you.
11:26You're...
11:26You're one of my best friends.
11:28No.
11:29No, you don't...
11:29You don't get to call me that.
11:34You don't mean that.
11:36I do.
11:37Now, can you please get out?
11:43Just so you know,
11:47he's going to break your heart.
11:58We should already be in the car.
12:00Coming!
12:07Hey, is this okay?
12:08I swear I left the tickets here.
12:11I thought your dad was meeting us there.
12:13Will you...
12:14Shoot, I forgot to make the reservation for lunch.
12:16Yeah, I figured, so I did it.
12:17Well, they're not going to start without me.
12:19We've got time.
12:20I was supposed to iron that shirt for you.
12:22Take it off and I can...
12:23It's handled.
12:24It's handled.
12:25It's handled.
12:25See?
12:25I use the starch spray that makes it look real smooth, huh?
12:30Oh, is that for me?
12:32What?
12:37Sweet, a laptop?
12:38Well, who sent this?
12:39What?
12:41Oh, my God.
12:42It's from Susanna.
12:45She must have planned it before.
12:47Classic Beck.
12:49I wish she could have been here.
12:52Yeah, Conrad and Jeremiah, too.
12:54They were busy.
12:56Yeah, sure.
13:04I feel awful.
13:08Brady, he was so angry at us.
13:12And he has every right to me, honestly.
13:17It's going to be okay, Billy.
13:19I promise.
13:24How?
13:33I think maybe we should hit pause.
13:38What?
13:40No.
13:42I don't want to make things harder for you guys than they already are.
13:44You're not.
13:45I promise.
13:46The most important thing right now
13:50is that you and Jeremiah are there for each other.
13:52Are there for Susanna.
13:53And I...
13:56Us being together would make that impossible.
13:59Ellie, come on.
14:02I can't do that to him.
14:16I hate that.
14:20Yeah, me too.
14:21I don't want to do it.
14:29Um...
14:34This was always yours.
14:38No matter what happens,
14:41we'll still be infinite.
15:09You should read this.
15:11Later.
15:11Here, we should go.
15:13Found them.
15:14Come on.
15:19They say that everything happens for a reason.
15:23Now, who they are exactly is unclear.
15:26Maybe a theologian coined it, or...
15:28I don't know.
15:29Whoever configured the simulation we're clearly living in.
15:33Maybe it was Rihanna.
15:34No, no, no.
15:36Rihanna can do no wrong.
15:38You're definitely not her.
15:41But we've heard it.
15:44Time and time again.
15:45It's supposed to convince us.
15:47You know, that everything had to happen.
15:49Exactly so in order to teach us something about ourselves.
15:52In order for us to grow.
15:56And meet our destinies.
16:02I think that's BS.
16:03I'm sorry, Mom.
16:05Sorry.
16:07You know, breakups don't always lead to breakthroughs.
16:10Sometimes a girl dumps you after an awesome summer,
16:14and it sucks.
16:15And you learn nothing from it,
16:17but you eventually force yourself to move on anyways.
16:24You know, but then, the unthinkable happens.
16:27And you realize it's pointless to think of life that way.
16:30Belly.
16:34Hey, I never see you in here.
16:36Ugh, your mom assigned me this room to clean.
16:39It's the easiest,
16:39since I don't think she sat foot in here once
16:41to do any writing this summer.
16:44Don't you hire cleaners anyway?
16:46Shh.
16:52I love that necklace on you.
16:56Connie told me everything that happened
16:58with the three of you.
17:02I'm sorry.
17:03Don't be sorry.
17:04It's not how I wanted this summer to end.
17:08Especially not.
17:13I just feel like I'm losing everyone.
17:15You're not.
17:17It just takes time.
17:19And you'll find your way back to each other eventually.
17:23And this place is always here for you.
17:27Yeah, but you've made every summer here so magical, Susanna.
17:31I mean, what happens...
17:32What happens...
17:34Belly?
17:36You love this place the same way I do.
17:41If anyone can keep the magic going here, it's you.
17:47You're my special girl.
17:53I need to call the cleaners.
17:57Promise me you'll never leave me.
18:04Because everything just happens.
18:07You know, good things, bad things, all in ways that you'd never expect.
18:12All in ways that are so completely out of your control that they could just drive you insane.
18:20There are times where it feels like the world is happening to you.
18:25But remember that you are also happening to the world.
18:30So don't wait.
18:32Make what you want happen.
18:34Because tomorrow isn't promised.
18:35So you better make fucking sure that you are living today.
19:03So extra.
19:04Although he did earn it with that speech.
19:06It was good.
19:07Yeah.
19:08The speech kind of pierced my soul.
19:13Don't laugh.
19:14No, no, I'm sorry.
19:15No, I feel like I've been in this nightmare ever since Susanna died.
19:19Maybe it's time to wake up.
19:22Oh, I gotta go find Milo.
19:24He needs my help putting together a look for tonight.
19:27Cool.
19:28Um, do you want to come over after and help me with mine?
19:31No fucking way.
19:32Are you coming?
19:33Yeah, yeah.
19:34Really?
19:35And I'm going to sign up for a varsity volleyball camp too.
19:38Yes!
19:39Oh my God, babe, this party's going to be insane.
19:41Like, you are going to die when you see Milo play.
19:43Uh, no, yeah, I mean, you literally might.
19:46Because, oh man, I could smell him from the podium.
19:48Really?
19:48Yeah.
19:48Oh, I'm sorry.
19:49Excuse me.
19:49My man doesn't have that Korean gene that makes you have no body odor.
19:53Okay, all right, come on, Kelly.
19:54Mom and Dad are meeting us at the restaurant.
19:55Bye.
19:56Bye.
19:56See you later.
19:58It was a great speech.
20:01Susanna would have loved it.
20:02Yeah, I know.
20:05You know, I'm glad you guys are coming to the party tonight.
20:08Wow.
20:08I can't believe what I'm hearing.
20:11You really want me and Taylor at your party?
20:13Why, I never said want.
20:14I just, I just think it's better than moping around at home.
20:20Like, you should drive.
20:22Really?
20:23I gotta read all the love in my DMs for my speech anyway, so.
20:26All right, come on.
20:27Ha ha.
20:32Yo, this is dope.
20:34I'm going viral on TikTok.
20:35Is that a good thing?
20:36What, millions of people around the world watching my speech on a loop?
20:40Yes.
20:42That is a very good thing.
20:44I gotta forward this to Khan and Cher, man.
20:49Thank you so much.
20:51Oh, I'm sorry.
20:52Could I get a box for all this?
20:54Yeah, thank you, man.
21:02Happiness is an activity.
21:04Um, okay.
21:07Okay, well, everyone agrees you are the best.
21:10It doesn't say that.
21:11It's so random.
21:11No, it doesn't.
21:12It literally says it right here.
21:13It literally says it right there.
21:14I don't know what you want.
21:14You want to see it?
21:15Yeah.
21:15You want to see it?
21:16Look, I don't know what you want from me.
21:17It says it right there.
21:18I know what you're telling you.
21:20We're so proud of you.
21:21You're going to have the time of your life at Princeton, right, Laura?
21:23Yeah, I love college.
21:25That's where I met Susanna.
21:29So, how are things going with your book?
21:31My publisher is hounding me to do this meet and greet event with booksellers.
21:35I said no.
21:38Why?
21:38Because it's not necessary.
21:42Okay.
21:43Uh, well, it's time for me to go get ready for the party.
21:45Mom, mwah, dad, mwah.
21:48Thank you for lunch.
21:49I'm going to go with him.
21:50Uh, it was delicious.
21:52All right.
21:53Have fun, kids.
21:54See you at home.
21:55Yep.
22:00So, you're not trying to promote your book?
22:03I'm not going to have schmoozy conversations about Susanna just to get prime placement in
22:07bookstores.
22:08Well, you did write a whole book about her.
22:10It might feel cathartic.
22:12I wrote the book in a fugue state.
22:14I have no interest in dissecting it just to come up with pithy insights on grief.
22:20Okay.
22:28Look, you wrote a beautiful book.
22:33I think Susanna would want you to share it with the world.
22:39She was always my biggest cheerleader.
22:42Guess now I have to be my own.
22:45Oh.
22:47I'll wear the skirt, but I draw the line at pom-poms.
22:55I am so excited that you're finally here this summer.
22:58Can we do, like, everything that we never got to do together?
23:00Like, parties, pool, mall.
23:02We have to get you a fake ID.
23:05Let's start by figuring out what I'm going to wear tonight.
23:06All right, okay.
23:08Okay.
23:12Susanna's earrings?
23:14They're perfect.
23:19Okay.
23:21Since my man is playing tonight, I'm going to need you to be the super hot friend standing
23:25next to his super hot girlfriend.
23:28Yeah.
23:28Let's get super hot.
23:29I love it when you agree with me.
23:33Um, I'm thinking this.
23:36That's what you call super hot?
23:38This looks so good on you.
23:40No, no.
23:41I've got to have something better.
23:42Oh, okay.
23:49Mm-mm.
23:53No.
24:03The call came the second week of September.
24:05Three weeks since the last time I'd seen him.
24:08It felt like a dream.
24:10Unreal.
24:12I've learned to love me as myself, but when you're with somebody else, I didn't expect
24:21to hear from you.
24:22Yeah, is it okay that I'm calling?
24:24I shouldn't have called.
24:24This was dumb.
24:25I'm sorry.
24:25No, no, no, no.
24:26It's okay.
24:26Um, we're still friends, right?
24:30Yeah, yeah.
24:32We're friends, yeah.
24:33Yeah, and, um, friends can talk on the phone.
24:37Yeah, yeah.
24:38Nothing weird about friends talking on the phone.
24:45Uh, so how's, how's college life?
24:48Um, it's cool.
24:50It's cool.
24:51My roommate snores even louder than you do, which-
24:54Oh, come on.
24:55I don't snore.
24:56Yes, you do.
24:57You a thousand percent do.
24:58I've heard you through the walls for years.
25:00Only when you're really tired, though.
25:05How's school for you?
25:06Boring.
25:07Painful.
25:08I mean, like, no, no.
25:09Who invented Trigg, and why do they torture innocent high school students with it?
25:15Can't be that bad.
25:16No, oh, it's, it's bad.
25:18It's, it's, it's really bad.
25:19I mean, I can't keep up with all the letters.
25:22Well, you know, the first thing you gotta do is determine if it's a right angle triangle or not.
25:25Badly, have you seen my, uh, big kettlebell, the 20-pound one?
25:28Steven, I'm on the phone.
25:29I'm gonna tell Taylor to go to bed.
25:30Hi, Steven.
25:35Hey, Conrad.
25:39It's not in here.
25:41Go away.
25:44Sorry about that.
25:46Okay, um, what were you saying about triangles again?
25:58Okay, if you want to wear the t-shirt, you know, we should at least crop it.
26:03It was Conrad's.
26:05You know, every time I think of him, I still get this, like, pain in my chest.
26:11Mm-hmm.
26:12I know.
26:14Socks, babe.
26:14But eventually, your emo always used to say, the best way to get over a man is to get under
26:20a new one.
26:27Heading to a grad party?
26:30Yeah, mine.
26:32Me and the guys are throwing it, remember?
26:34Oh, right.
26:35Well, have fun.
26:37And don't drink and drive.
26:38Oh, don't worry.
26:39I promised Steven I'd be the sober driver.
26:41Oh, and I ordered you a pizza, okay?
26:43So, please eat it.
26:44Don't worry about me.
26:46Go.
26:46All right.
26:47I love you.
26:47Bye.
26:47Bye.
26:48Love you.
26:48Be safe.
26:49Bye.
26:49I love you.
26:50Bye.
27:06Oh, my God.
27:09Milo.
27:11Hi.
27:12Thank God you're here.
27:14Bye.
27:20Bye.
27:20Oh, my God.
27:21Hey, so I need to be able to see you when I'm up on stage.
27:24Yeah.
27:24Nice.
27:24Stay up close.
27:25Okay.
27:26Yeah.
27:26Yeah?
27:26Mm-hmm.
27:27My boy!
27:28Yeah!
27:28That's fine.
27:30You call this a party?
27:31Where are all the hot ladies, you promised?
27:34We're literally standing right here.
27:36Oh, no offense.
27:38I'm into older women.
27:40Personal preference.
27:41Yeah.
27:42Hey, babe, I'm going to go help the guys finish something.
27:44Okay.
27:44All right.
27:46Bye.
27:47Bye.
27:48Bye.
27:50Okay.
27:51Well, have fun, everybody.
27:53I got to go make the rounds, entertain the people.
27:55You know, host shit.
27:57Okay.
27:58Come on, Spike.
28:00You're so cute tonight, you know that?
28:02Come on, let's go get some drinks.
28:03I can't drink.
28:04I'm trying.
28:05Okay.
28:08What?
28:09Oh, my God.
28:10But camp is going to be so much fun.
28:12I bought us all matching PJs.
28:14Oh, you are going to need to buy one more set.
28:17Guess who finally decided to join us?
28:19The killer B is going to have her captaincy back from Donna in, like, no time.
28:23You know what I mean?
28:24Yeah, right?
28:25But Coach Shaw, he's okay with it.
28:27You know.
28:28Come back.
28:29I actually haven't talked to Coach yet.
28:31I wanted to talk to you guys first.
28:34I mean, after last season, I totally don't blame you if you don't want me back on the team.
28:39Oh, shut up.
28:40You're always one of us.
28:41Yes!
28:42Right answer.
28:44Bump, set, hit, swipe.
28:45That's the way we like to fight.
28:48Come on.
28:49Come on, team.
28:50Let's hear you scream.
28:53Here.
28:54And for you.
28:55There we go.
28:56Oh, my God.
29:05It's game point, Miss Conklin.
29:07Bye-bye, Conrad.
29:09Hey, you still there?
29:12So, my roommate, Trusky.
29:14Oh, did he sleepwalk in his underwear again?
29:16No, he didn't.
29:17He didn't, thankfully.
29:18But we were talking and it turns out he's a 5G conspiracist.
29:22So, apparently, that guy that Katie was seeing had a girlfriend the whole time.
29:27I mean, it just sucks.
29:28Like, he didn't really seem like the type, you know?
29:37Did you know my dad cheated?
29:41Adam cheated on Susanna.
29:43Yeah, the first time my mom was sick, he had an affair with his secretary, Kaylee.
29:51I found out about it last spring.
29:52I mean, like, the same day I found out of my mom's cancer coming back.
29:59How'd you find out?
30:00Um, I came home early from school one day and heard them fighting.
30:10She was crying so much, Belly.
30:12She, I've never heard her cry like that before.
30:17So, I left.
30:19I went back out.
30:20I drove around town for two hours and came back and pretended not to know anything.
30:25I'm so sorry.
30:27It sucks that you had to carry that secret for so long.
30:32Yeah, it's just exhausting.
30:34Like, I couldn't turn my brain off.
30:38It was like, if you do that, then this horrible thing is going to happen.
30:42But if you do this, then, you know, it's just this catastrophic thing will happen.
30:47Oh, my God.
30:48That sounds so stressful.
30:55Oh, my God damn it.
30:56It's two o'clock.
30:57You said you had practice early.
30:59I should let you go.
30:59Oh.
31:02Yeah.
31:04Um, off-season workouts suck.
31:06But, uh, there's a rumor that a college scout from Finch is coming to watch our club team play this
31:11weekend.
31:12And there's a chance coach might make me captain.
31:14What?
31:15That's crazy.
31:16I'll definitely let you go.
31:18I didn't know that.
31:20Five more minutes?
31:24Yeah.
31:25Okay.
31:25Yeah.
31:26I'll do it.
31:27I'm gonna do it.
31:28Yeah.
31:29Oh, yeah.
31:29Mm-hmm.
31:30Yeah.
31:30What are you waiting for?
31:31I'm actually doing it.
31:33I'm fine.
31:33Good luck.
31:40Wow, you're, uh, really good at operating a keg.
31:45Wow.
31:45Hi, Conklin.
31:46Oh, um,
31:47How do you want Katniss Epita?
31:50Uh, in Paris Immortal, as usual.
31:53Yeah, good.
31:55I didn't know you took French.
31:57Oui.
31:58Want one?
31:59No, no, I'm okay.
32:00Thanks.
32:01Uh, I'm the Didi tonight.
32:03Cheers.
32:04Cheers.
32:05Cheers.
32:08I could spend my life in this sweet surrender.
32:15I could stay lost in this sweet surrender.
32:38Do you want to know something so romantic?
32:43Milo wrote this song for me.
32:46It's a cover.
32:49Love that song from the movie Armageddon?
32:52Oh.
32:53Well, it's still romantic.
32:55Okay, wait.
32:56Don't make me beg you for details.
32:57What did you and Corey talk about?
33:00Uh, the book I'm reading.
33:03I'm sorry, you suck at talking to guys.
33:05Okay, I'm Rusty, and also he's the one who brought it up.
33:09And he spoke to me in French.
33:10Bitch, what?
33:11In French?
33:12Okay, that's so hot.
33:13Like, he sounds obsessed with you.
33:16Yeah, I don't know.
33:17I mean, that combo took so much effort.
33:20Like, is it supposed to be that hard?
33:23I mean, like, look at you and Milo.
33:24You guys just make sense.
33:29Well, Milo and I are soulmates.
33:31I don't want to fall asleep
33:32Cause I miss you, baby
33:34And I don't want to miss a thing
33:37Cause even when I dream of you
33:40The sweetest dream would never do
33:43I still miss you, baby
33:45And I don't want to miss a thing
34:16Can we forget?
34:18About the things I said when I was drunk
34:22I didn't mean to call you that
34:26I can't remember what was said
34:29Or what you threw at me
34:32Please tell me
34:34Please tell me why
34:39My cousin
34:40Belly, I'm a crowd sir
34:41Hold my shirt for a second
34:43And make sure no one spills anything on it
34:44Ew!
34:45Steven, no, I don't want to hold your bloody teeth here
34:50What the hell?
34:51Are you okay?
34:53It's not my belly, I'm sorry
34:54No, yeah, no, I'm good
34:56I'm totally fine
34:57I'm just, um
34:58I'm gonna go get a drink
35:01Well, you're my sober driver, belly bells
35:04Don't let me down!
35:05Steven!
35:06It's no surprise to me
35:08I am my own worst enemy
35:10I had this weird thought today
35:15Yeah?
35:17I love weird thoughts
35:18I was thinking
35:19If my dad had cheated on my mom
35:24She probably wouldn't have even cared
35:27Is that harsh?
35:29No, but you really think Laurel wouldn't have a reaction
35:31I mean, kinda
35:33Like, nothing about my dad ever excited her
35:36You know?
35:37They were, like, never romantic around each other
35:39And you want to see your parents being romantic?
35:44Maybe
35:45I mean, I just can't imagine marrying someone
35:49Who didn't give me fireworks
35:51You know, like, like electric jolts every time I saw them
35:57Were you surprised when you found out your parents were getting divorced?
36:00Uh, yes and no
36:02I mean, I always thought divorce meant fighting, you know?
36:06And there was none of that
36:07I mean, they were cold for a little while
36:08But, um, everything's kind of back to normal
36:15In a weird way, that must almost be a little harder to understand
36:19Exactly
36:23Oh, wow
36:25What?
36:26I don't know
36:28I've just never sent any of this to anyone before
36:32Me either
36:37Hey, can I ask you something?
36:39Anything
36:41Um, how's, how's JR?
36:44Is he, is he doing okay?
36:45Um, yeah, yeah, he seems good
36:48Why?
36:48I don't know
36:49I've, I've texted him a few times since summer ended
36:51And, uh, he never writes back
36:54Yeah, no, I mean, he's probably just busy with senior year stuff
36:57Right, right, right
36:58Or, you know, it's that he'll never get over what I did
37:00And hold it against me for the rest of our lives
37:02Belly
37:02Yeah, fine
37:04Forget I said anything
37:05Forget I said anything
37:13I learned something kind of cool
37:15Tell me
37:16Did you know that Venus is an evening star for 263 days out of the year
37:23And then it disappears from the sky for 50 days before returning as a morning star for another 263 days
37:31I did not know that
37:33I did not know that
37:33That is very cool
37:34And right now it's an evening star
37:36It's really bright next to the moon
37:39I'm actually looking at it right now
37:44It's probably, uh, against the rules to say this but, um, I wish we were looking at it together
37:56Me too
38:04And Belly?
38:06I'll be there
38:33Hey!
38:34Hey!
38:35Hey, Conklin!
38:36Hey!
38:36Long time no see, huh?
38:38Yeah!
38:38No, I know it's been ages, right?
38:40Yeah
38:41Is that seat taking?
38:43Uh, nope, nope
38:44I'm right ahead
38:45Yeah
38:53I wonder if Venus is a morning star or an evening star tonight
38:57I think Venus is a planet
38:59No, actually, uh, ancient astronomers, um, you know what?
39:05Never mind
39:06Okay
39:06It's dumb
39:09You know, you can hardly see any stars this close to the city anyway
39:13There's a lot more by the beach
39:18I, uh, used to spend every summer at this beach in Massachusetts
39:21Hmm
39:24Are you going this summer?
39:26Uh, no, no I'm not
39:28Yeah
39:29So then you'll be here for the 4th, huh?
39:31Yeah
39:32Okay
39:33Well, my folks are going to be out of town
39:34And I'll just think about having a few people over
39:37You and your friends should totally come
39:39That, that sounds cool
39:41Alright, cool
39:46Come here
39:47You kind of have something
39:49Uh, Belly, no, I was just
39:54Oh my gosh, yeah
39:55No, I was just, you had something in your
39:56I have something in your
39:57Yeah, yeah
39:58You know why?
39:58Because I just, it's crap
39:59Because I just got kicked in the head
40:00That's right
40:01Holy shit
40:01But no, no, no, I'm totally fine
40:02I'm just, um
40:03Oh my god
40:03I'm gonna go
40:04Okay, see ya
40:05Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah
40:06Um, hey, hey, Belly, actually
40:08Um, could you do me a favor?
40:10Could you put in a good word for me?
40:12With, uh, your friend Marcy?
40:16Yeah, Marcy?
40:17Yeah
40:17Yes, you, and you
40:18That makes sense
40:19Yeah, I totally will
40:20Cool
40:21Thank you for this
40:22Yes, okay, bye
40:24Ha, ha, ha
40:26Ha, ha
40:27Ha, ha
40:33Belly, Belly, come here
40:36Hey, sis
40:37Sis, sis, sis
40:37Check it out, check it out
40:38Check it out
40:40Oh
40:40Oh
40:41Oh my god
40:44I can't believe you did that
40:46This party sucks
40:47Dude, it's beer, man
40:49It'll dry, chill
40:51I'm leaving, okay
40:53Wait, wait
40:53Did something happen?
40:54No, nothing happened
40:55Whatever
40:56Uh, Steven, can you just get Spike to drive you home, please?
40:59Spike?
41:00No, Spike, Spike is drunk
41:02You, you, you promised to be my sober ride tonight
41:04Okay, well, I'm ready to go now
41:06Okay, well, I'm not
41:07Great, then can you just call an Uber or something?
41:09Why, why are you being such a buzzkill right now?
41:11Oh, I'm sorry
41:12Am I ruining your fun night, Mr. Perfect Valedictorian?
41:15Kinda, yeah
41:16Okay, well, in case you forgot
41:18Which it clearly seems like you did
41:19Susanna just died
41:21So I'm a little bit sad
41:22But please, don't let that stop you from having the time of your life
41:25Fuck you
41:25You know, I lost Susanna too
41:28Okay, you don't think I'm sad about that?
41:30Oh, what, were you crowd surfing the pain away?
41:32My apologies
41:32No, you should apologize
41:33You screwed up and out
41:35Now everything is weird with Conrad and Jeremiah
41:37I mean, they won't even text me back anymore because of you
41:39Okay, guys, wait a second
41:40That is not my fault
41:42Isn't it?
41:43Hmm?
41:43I should be celebrating with them tonight
41:46But they wouldn't come because you made things messy
41:50You had Jeremiah and it just wasn't enough
41:52You had to have Conrad too
41:55God, you are so fucking selfish
41:57Stephen
41:58What?
41:58Serious?
41:59I had to have Conrad?
42:01Are you kidding?
42:02I was in love, Stephen
42:04Like out of my mind in love
42:06What was I supposed to do?
42:10Belly
42:12Belly
42:12Stephen
42:15Hey
42:19Stephen is a drunk idiot right now
42:21Please do not listen to him
42:22No, he's right
42:23I mean
42:24I ruined things with both of them
42:26And then Susanna died
42:27And I completely ruined her funeral
42:28And I just, I wish I hadn't started any of it
42:30No, you don't
42:31Yes, I do
42:31No, you don't
42:32Yes, I do
42:32And I'm so tired of feeling sad all the time
42:35And I just
42:36I don't think I get to feel better
42:38You think that right now
42:39But I promise you
42:40No, no
42:41No, no, no, no, no
42:42Nothing is promised
42:43You can't promise anything
42:45Sorry
42:46Sorry, I just
42:47I know you're trying your best
42:50I don't
42:50I don't expect anyone to understand what I'm
42:53I'm
42:53Going through right now
42:54And I think I just have to
42:57Deal with it alone
43:03I'm gonna go
43:04Okay, I can come with you
43:05No, no, no
43:06You stay
43:07I mean, it's your boyfriend's debut
43:09And
43:11I just
43:11I just need to go to bed
43:14Will you text me when you get home, please?
43:16Yeah
43:18I love you
43:18Love you
43:35Love you
43:36Love you
43:37Love you
43:45Love you
43:45Love you
43:45Love you
43:45Love you
43:45Love you
43:46Love you
43:46Love you
43:48Love you
43:48Love you
43:48I got my driver's license last week
43:52Just like we always talked about
43:55Cause you were so excited for me
43:58To finally drive up to your house
44:02But today I drove through the suburbs
44:04Crying
44:05Cause you weren't around
44:05Crying
44:06Cause you weren't around
44:11And all my friends are tired
44:14Of hearing how much I miss you
44:18But
44:18I kinda feel sorry for them
44:21Cause they'll never know you the way that I do
44:24Yet today I drove through the suburbs
44:27And pictured I was driving home to you
44:34And I know we weren't perfect
44:37But I've never felt this way for no one
44:43Oh, and I just can't imagine how you could be so okay
44:50I know that I'm gone
44:54I guess you didn't mean what you wrote in that song about me
45:01Cause you said forever now I drive alone past your street
45:07You said forever now I drive alone past your street
45:25Hey
45:26Happy
45:27Almost Halloween
45:28Conrad
45:30I know I'm not supposed to be here but I'm
45:34Here
45:36I brought candy
45:41What
45:44What are you doing here?
45:46Um
45:48I wanted to see you
45:50So
45:51Yeah, yeah
45:52Um
45:53You know, but I thought
45:54Right, no, I know, I know you
45:57You were worried about Jared
45:58But look, I had a chance to talk to him
46:00And he's doing really good actually
46:02He's, um
46:03Doing on dates, you know
46:05And, um
46:06He's been on this high ever since he got made Homecoming King
46:08That's great
46:09So, um
46:11He's over
46:12Yeah
46:15I think he is
46:22Ellie
46:22I don't think I could ever get over you
46:26I mean, I'm not
46:27I'm here
46:30But whenever I talk to you, I'm just happy
46:33And I gotta say, standing in front of you right now, it's torture
46:36Not being able to kiss you
46:40Oh
46:40Oh
46:40oh
46:42Oh, my God.
47:06Belly, we need to talk.
47:08I'm kind of tired.
47:10Sit down.
47:20You didn't eat?
47:21Your guidance counselor emailed me.
47:24I didn't know you lost your volleyball captaincy
47:26or that your grades were so bad.
47:28Yeah, I'm sorry.
47:29I'm not getting into Princeton like Steven.
47:31That's not what I'm saying.
47:33You can do better than this.
47:35I'm really disappointed in you.
47:37Sorry, Mom.
47:38You know, Susanna died, remember?
47:39You don't get to use Susanna's death as an excuse.
47:41This whole year has been hard for me, too.
47:44You were barely here.
47:46And I don't blame you for being there for Susanna and the boys.
47:49They needed you, but you can't blame me either
47:51for things that happened because you were away.
47:53This isn't about blame.
47:55This is about you and the choices you made.
47:58It's about taking responsibility for yourself,
48:00even when things are hard.
48:02Life keeps going.
48:04You can't just give up.
48:05You want to talk about taking responsibility?
48:07You won't even promote your book
48:09because you refuse to talk about Susanna.
48:12You can't just suddenly be concerned about volleyball
48:14when you haven't gone to a single one of my games this year.
48:18I waited all year for you to step up and be a parent.
48:22You gave up way before I did.
48:35You have to do that at every stop,
48:37and it's kicking up my gag reflex.
48:39If you'd rather walk, we can let you out right here.
48:43I'd probably be safer, honestly.
48:45Hey, you don't got a word, man.
48:47I'm fully sober.
48:49Fucking belly, man.
48:51Taking my car and leaving me straight into my own party.
48:54Who does that?
48:55Hmm.
48:56I don't know.
48:57Who yells at their own sister in front of everyone for being sad?
49:00She yelled at me first.
49:02So mature of you, Steven.
49:04How about you try some compassion next time, asshole?
49:07Aren't you supposed to, like, come together and grieve?
49:11Life cannot be separated from death.
49:14Wow.
49:15So helpful.
49:17Man, thank you.
49:18Milo's very in touch with his emotions.
49:20That's what makes him a great musician.
49:22Aw.
49:23Thanks, babe.
49:25You know, I actually have a record label interested in Siamese.
49:30What?
49:31Yeah.
49:31Check it out.
49:33Cancel Culture Records.
49:37Babe.
49:38They only have one post.
49:40Yeah, this was so punk about it.
49:43Yeah, dude.
49:44Congrats, man.
49:45Congrats.
49:45Oh, sweet man.
49:49Oh, sweet man.
50:15I wish I could be there to watch you shine.
50:18But you have an extraordinary mom who will be with you every step of the way.
50:25Remember, the world is not only happening to you, but you are happening to the world.
50:31And don't forget to enjoy the ride.
50:35Love, Susanna.
51:01Hey, I know it's late, but about the bookseller event.
51:06I changed my mind.
51:07I'll do it.
51:14I knew I'd lose Susanna eventually.
51:20I just didn't know I'd end up losing all of them.
51:24In my memory, the three of them will always be entwined.
51:27Forever linked.
51:29There can't be one without the others.
51:39Now, they're all gone.
51:41I knew the darkness at 158.
51:44The words that you whispered for just us to know.
51:49You told me you love me.
51:51So why did you go?
51:55Away.
52:03Away.
52:03Away.
52:05Away.
52:05Away.
52:05Away.
52:05Away.
52:24Just like our lives
52:30Ellie?
52:32Hi, Jeremiah. I'm so glad.
52:34Are you with Conrad?
52:37Uh, no. Why would I be with Conrad?
52:39I don't know. I just thought maybe you guys would, um...
52:43Jared, what is going on?
52:47Conrad's gone.
52:49Wait, what do you mean, gone?
52:52He's not answering my texts or picking up my calls.
52:55Since when?
52:56Yesterday.
52:58I mean, isn't he in the middle of finals?
52:59Maybe he pulled in all night or at the library.
53:01No, no, I don't think so.
53:03Apparently, he told this from me that everything is fucked and then he just took off.
53:08I think I'm gonna go to Brown in the morning and see if I can track him down.
53:11I'll never get Susanna back.
53:13But I can't let Jeremiah and Conrad go too.
53:16Okay.
53:18But I'm coming with you.
53:24Yeah.
53:26I saw you dancing in a crowded room
53:30You look so happy when I'm not with you
53:34But then you saw me caught you by surprise
53:38A single teardrop falling from your eyes
53:42I don't know why
53:44I'll make you run away
53:51I'll make you cry when I run away
53:58Take me back
54:00Cause I wanna stay
54:02Save your tears for another day
54:06Save your tears for another day
54:13Save your tears for another day
54:38Save your tears for another day
54:43Save your tears for another day
54:49Tears for another day
54:54Save your tears
54:58Save your tears
54:58Save your tears for another day
55:46Save your tears
55:49Save your tears
56:19Save your tears
56:20Save your tears
56:21Save your tears
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