- 7 minutes ago
Crookhaven S01E01 (2026) [Full Movie] [Ranked]Full EP - Full
Category
🎥
Short filmTranscript
00:05So here's the first thing you should know about me, I never stole from just anyone, I had rules, rule
00:12number one, they had to be rich, like, they could spare a few quid, rule number two, they had to
00:19be alone, no witnesses, oh, definitely no one with kids.
00:26Normally, I wouldn't have picked an old man, to be honest, but what can I say, we were hungry, and
00:32he was the perfect mark, posh, alone, distracted.
00:41Oh, sorry, sir, should look where I'm going, let me help you.
00:45I think not.
00:47My bad.
00:51It was too easy.
00:58I guess I should have known.
01:01Look, I know coppers have a dodgy rep these days, but they seem like one of the good ones.
01:06So I was thinking we could just all call this an honest mistake?
01:10I'm arresting you for theft, you do not have to say it.
01:12Wait, there's actually one tiny little thing that I would like to say.
01:21Wait, get back here!
01:26Wait, get back here!
01:30Stop right there!
01:31I don't know.
01:37Oh, my God.
02:12I can't believe you're 140 this time, honestly.
02:15You and Scratchguards, what's your secret?
02:17I guess I was just born lucky.
02:22Someday soon, we're going to eat like this every night.
02:25Not every night. Look at me here.
02:27We're going to live in a caravan by the sea.
02:29You're going to have to clean for those stupid mercies.
02:33I'm going to give you the last you deserve.
02:36I swear.
02:40What are you up to?
02:42It's us against the world, right, Grandma?
02:45Always.
02:50What is it, honey?
02:51My coin. My lucky coin.
03:17We can retrace our stout.
03:22No, I'll turn it.
03:44Where am I?
03:58No, no, no!
03:59X4
04:07Look around, bro.
04:08Literally, nothing here. Just like, words.
04:11Well, don't blame me. They said get off at Warhart.
04:15Look, this is Warhart.
04:17Nice job, bro. Now I'm stranded in an actual wasteland.
04:20I'm not giving the tactical choice between this and police custody.
04:23I just thought...
04:24What?
04:28Who are you?
04:29Could ask you the exact same question.
04:33Where are you going? We're in the middle of a conversation here.
04:36Rude.
04:41Just out of interest, you aren't told to, like, board a train by, say, a cryptic message on your computer.
04:47Word to the wise.
04:48When you got that message, you aren't hypothetically maybe engaged in something ethically challenging.
04:54What if I was?
04:56Look, man, it sounds like we're both brung here by the same evil genius.
05:00So don't it kind of make sense to share what we know?
05:03All I know is whoever this is, I need to take back what they stole.
05:06Didn't stole nothing from us.
05:08And do whatever it takes to stop them grassing me up.
05:11Otherwise, my life is basically over.
05:36This was a bad idea. A bunch of kids walk through the woods. That's literally the plot of every horror
05:43movie ever made.
05:44Hey, mystery man. How do you even know you're going the right way?
05:48He doesn't. He's about 45 degrees off course. Look, I saw a glitch from the GPS.
05:53It's like the whole area just deleted from the map.
05:57That's where we're heading, no? You're hackers.
06:00What makes you say that?
06:02Jigs up, bro. Mazzle fest.
06:05Yep. We are actually the brothers' crim. Amade? We's heading.
06:11The brothers' crim?
06:13B-hacking legends? No?
06:17And you are?
06:19The signal's just gone. Someone blocked it. Look, the screen's just died.
06:33This whole thing's a trap. That phone is not going to be the only thing that's there to you. We're
06:37lost.
06:39In the middle of a wood, no way of calling for help. No one even knows who are here. Except...
06:44Them.
06:47Whoever them even is.
07:00It's a maze. This whole wood's a maze.
07:03Yeah, right. Toast a maze.
07:05It's not a trap. It's a test.
07:10Come on. I know where to go.
07:25Level one complete. Power up.
07:28Sorry, how exactly did you do that?
07:30Ha. I'm happy. Yes.
07:38Where place to put a statue?
07:40Ezekiel Locket. 1781 to 1857.
07:45What's up with Ezekiel?
07:48We have help here?
08:03Want to hear a joke? How many kids does it take to open a door? One to pick the lock,
08:08and the other three to stand around like morons.
08:11You will not brought us here.
08:13Clearly not, dude. I'm in the same kayak as you. Word to the wise.
08:21Followed your sense of station. 12.3 miles.
08:26We were being followed.
08:27Knew it.
08:29You might not show your face till now.
08:30I assumed this was a trap, and you would all die horribly.
08:39Nope.
08:41It's a decoy.
08:43Real lock must be hidden.
08:52Metal gun.
08:54Why is he pointing at the wall?
08:55Not as dumb as you look.
09:03Oh, duh.
09:04Totally different color.
09:10Watch and learn, suckers.
09:14Oh, duh.
09:35Hey!
09:36I'm awake!
09:37I'm awake!
09:37I'm awake!
09:38Oh!
09:40Head rush.
09:43Hang on.
09:45Forties?
09:47Together already?
09:48I wasn't expecting you for hours.
09:50Right then.
09:51Give us a hand, would you?
09:52Yeah, right.
09:53We'll just get on some random boat.
09:55It's a weird looking streamer.
09:58Maybe start with who you are, and why we're here.
10:01First one's easy.
10:03I'm Mickey, but I'm not at liberty to tell you the rest.
10:07Just supposed to ferry folk to the island.
10:10What's on the island?
10:12Your future.
10:19But where we were going wasn't just our future.
10:24We were heading for a whole new world.
10:27A million miles from the one we knew.
10:30A world I'd never have believed even existed.
10:35Until I saw it with my own two eyes.
10:41Welcome to Crookhaven!
10:55Right, you lot kindly surrender all electric devices.
10:58Be like cutting my arm off.
11:00Really?
11:00That can be arranged some.
11:06Give me eight.
11:07Dude, it's a camera.
11:10I'm not going to make any calls on it.
11:12Right, look lively.
11:13Come along, keep it moving.
11:15Let's go!
11:35This is like some kind of swanky mansion.
11:37But why did both guys say it's our future?
11:40Guessing it's not a luxury hotel.
11:42No one else getting major prison vibes?
11:45Now I am.
11:52I am.
11:57Right, Al.
11:58Horace.
11:59Get this on charge.
12:01Yes, sir.
12:01Let the gaffer know we have all four of these guests.
12:03We'll have to stay.
12:04We'll have to stay.
12:06We'll be.
12:11I understand about catching flies.
12:14Come on.
12:15In your trot.
12:15..
12:30Don't touch him.
12:33Well, it just crawled in.
12:35Merit?
12:35Gotta be.
12:36They reek of it.
12:38We should make him feel at home.
12:47the motive governs the meat yeah that's our uh it's our credo sorry this this must all seem
12:53very confusing uh overwhelming but come we'll explain everything so this is a school
13:01crook haven's not just a school it's the world's oldest academy for crooks and the most exclusive
13:08in theory all crooklings must register within five minutes or we'll assume you're a hostile
13:14intellectual how does this make sense i mean they get us here by threatening to grasp us to the cops
13:19and i want to teach us to be criminals not criminals crooks that's the whole point we only use our
13:26skills to do right how do i put this in a way that even a merit can understand um criminals
13:30baddies
13:31us goodies what's a merit thank you edgar
13:37we'll take it from here my pleasure whisper at miss jericho always happy to help see you later
13:43all deception classes are cancelled with me this way hold on wait a sec what did he call whisper
13:51whisper whisper we got hacked by a whisper ain't no other for my sins i teach cyber intrusion
13:58i teach infiltration sorry just to be clear so you use your skills to do right does that mean you
14:06work for like the government it's a complex symbiosis officially we don't exist unofficially
14:13we've been vital to global security for almost 200 years
14:18um
14:24and we just entered the fifth dimension from twins to octuplets bro like quintillion nerds
14:29bad enough seeing you guys in one mirror this is my own personal help
14:34what is this we call it the specularium it's a shortcut
14:40and an escape route and a vital training course to hone your spatial orientation
14:50an elite crook needs all six senses to be on point why do you need an escape route why wouldn't
14:56we i still don't get why we're here why us the crooked complex keeps constant lookout for fresh
15:04blood the four of you were handpicked out of thousands for your skills
15:09crucially you guys only ever steal for the right reasons
15:15this way time to meet the big guy
15:25my apologies
15:26i had hoped to welcome you in person but you completed your tasks far sooner
15:30than expected
15:33caspian locket your new headmaster and of course i know fine well who you are
15:37ade and eddie korra jia u and
15:42gabriel
15:43avery
15:44may i introduce
15:45mr karp
15:47ahead of deception
15:53it was you
15:54a posh bloke
15:58and you you weren't even a copper
15:59that was quite the getaway
16:01the past 24 hours has been a test
16:04happily you passed
16:07here you all are
16:10whisper and miss jericho to the armory please
16:13you let me think i was going to jail
16:15that was the idea
16:16you stole from me
16:17you stole from me sir
16:20you set all that up
16:23disguise the fake cop
16:25for me
16:26we'd have done whatever it took
16:27just one thing mr locket sir
16:29we sincerely appreciate the offer but
16:32our parents aren't exactly going to be done with the idea of us coming to a school for
16:36crims
16:37crims gentlemen crooks
16:39naturally you will stay undercover for the rest of your lives
16:42you can't ask us to do that
16:44for them to learn the truth could be lethal
16:47we have some very dangerous enemies
16:55you're concerned about your grandmother
16:58don't be
16:59we've spoken
16:59you've done what
17:00same goes for all of you
17:02what did you tell her
17:03as far as they're concerned
17:04you're sitting an exam for st jude's academy right now
17:07should you accept
17:08you'll tell them you've been offered a full scholarship starting at once
17:11take tonight
17:13consider
17:14carefully
17:23i don't need time to consider
17:25there's no way i can leave my grandma
17:28that's not gonna happen
17:30i'll just take my coin and go
17:33thanks for the same
17:34you disappoint me mr ravery
17:37but i'm afraid you can't leave now
17:39the woods are far from safe after dark
17:42first thing tomorrow
17:43unless you change your mind
17:45i won't
17:49i can't
17:50sir
17:57remind you to students in the mess
17:59please recycle all packaging
18:01from return to stolen cutlery to the kitchen
18:04silverware is not for skulldugging practice
18:09i know that look
18:11i was you once
18:12but trust me it's madhouse and it feels like home
18:16thanks but
18:17i have a home
18:20that's penelope
18:21the ultimate legacy
18:23legacy
18:25yeah you and i amig we're merits
18:26we're here for one reason and one reason only
18:29because we're fire
18:31keep telling yourself that leon
18:33but most crooks like isabella here
18:35are legacies
18:36our parents or our grandparents were here
18:39some of us go back generations
18:41seven
18:42in my case
18:44we met earlier
18:46edgar de la combe
18:47this is dorian
18:48macartha
18:49only third gen
18:52and uh you are
18:54gabriel avery
18:55and merit
18:57good for you
18:58look forward to seeing what you can do in class
19:00well i hate to disappoint you edgar
19:02i won't be sticking around
19:04sorry but you've been offered a place at crookhaven
19:07and you're gonna turn it down so you can
19:08what
19:09go back to shoplifting
19:11stealing bikes
19:14that's a good one
19:15alright dorian
19:16it wasn't a joke
19:18thanks
19:19now i met you
19:21and now i've made the right decision
19:32so you don't just walk straight in
19:34hand into them on a stolen platter
19:36big bunch of napole babies
19:38that's fundamentally inequitable
19:40bro
19:40we're still a part of this
19:42we get to study cyber intrusion
19:43and deception
19:44and scorduggery
19:45and at the end of it
19:46we get to be a part of a secret network
19:48that's going to make us rich
19:49you mean help defeat criminals and restore justice
19:52yeah that's in most
19:53none of you guys bothered by the whole
19:55lying to your families forever thing
19:57your grandma under your steel
19:59yeah you're joking
20:00so what's the difference
20:02that's a little why i lie in this
20:06i mean this should be a whole secret life
20:12you know why i'm taking top one
20:15you know why i hate your house
20:16not like i do
20:17which one of us painted on the eiffel tower bro
20:19only because you had eaten in like an hour
20:21that doesn't count
20:23gabriel
20:24i stole this for you
20:27iron
20:29as it sells
20:35locket stole it again
20:36what is it
20:37my coin
20:38why am i the only one who keeps robbing
20:40hold the phone
20:43you're saying
20:44the thing you came all this way for
20:47risked your life for
20:50was a coin
20:50not just any coin
20:57ever
20:57i
21:16mi
21:17have you
21:17p
21:34Why are you spying on me, Avery?
21:36I wasn't spying, I was looking for...
21:38Who?
21:39Locket.
21:43Why?
21:47Because he's a thieving con-eye.
21:49Show some respect, that's your headmaster.
21:51No, actually, because I'm not staying.
21:54So, to me, he's just some stuck-up guy in an itchy suit.
21:57He likes playing mind games with kids.
22:00It's pretty messed up, when you think about it.
22:02You're talking about the greatest crook of his generation.
22:06Big whoop. Happy for him.
22:08Do you have any idea how lucky you are to be here?
22:12And you're just gonna throw it away?
22:16It's so ungrateful.
22:19So ignorant.
22:21What they even see in you.
22:24Not bad.
22:26To be fair.
22:29But there's something off.
22:32I just can't quite put my...
22:33Thanks, but I only need a critique from someone like you.
22:39Word of warning, don't go marching up to locket office.
22:42Won't end well for you.
22:44Thanks, but...
22:45I don't need advice from someone like you.
22:54It's the eyes that are greener than that one.
23:00It's your choice.
23:00It's my fault.
23:05I don't need a critique from someone like you.
23:08It's my fault.
23:11It's my fault.
23:13It has been an annoyance.
23:13It's my fault.
23:15It's my fault.
23:16It's my fault.
23:21I don't need to do anything.
23:21It's my fault.
23:21I don't need to be able to shoot for you.
23:23The one who needs you.
23:23I don't need to be able to forget that.
23:31Evening, Mr. Avery.
23:37What do you want with me?
23:39The first time is to get you here, the second time to keep you here.
23:43I already told you, I can't.
23:45How is stealing my coin going to change it?
23:47By showing how much you have to learn.
23:52I don't know when I need to.
23:53You're a blunt instrument.
23:54You didn't pause to consider why I had taken your coin,
23:57or the smartest way to retrieve it.
23:58You just went stomping blindly through the school like a man possessed,
24:01telegraphing your weakness.
24:03What weakness?
24:04You see everyone as a threat.
24:08You're a dodgy, posh bloke.
24:09He likes blackmailing kids.
24:12You are a threat.
24:16Coin, please, sir.
24:19I'm not here to threaten you, Gabriel.
24:22I'm here to save you.
24:24Save me from what?
24:26I can't bear to see talent go to waste.
24:29It would be a tragedy for you to spend the rest of your life as a petty criminal.
24:33What, when I could come here and be a professional criminal?
24:36I'm not a criminal, Avery.
24:38A crook.
24:38They steal, we restore.
24:39They destroy, we repair.
24:41We'll give you the skills to beat criminals at their own game.
24:44Right now, you're good.
24:45With our help, you could be great.
24:48Or, you could go back to being a nobody.
24:52You don't know what my life is.
24:53On the contrary, I know everything about you,
24:56right down to how much vinegar you like on your chips.
24:59Far too much, in my opinion.
25:01I know you have a deep sense of right and wrong,
25:03and I know that you long to save your grandmother from those despicable Merciers.
25:07But tell me this.
25:09How many pockets would you have to pick to buy that caravan by the sea?
25:12How much help would you be in a young offenders institute?
25:14Because the next time you're arrested, it won't be Mr. Khan.
25:21My coin.
25:23Now.
25:28Please.
25:34Well, I see I'm not going to change your mind.
25:36Well, perhaps you should call her.
25:41Because you'll be worried.
26:00Goodbye, sir.
26:08Why didn't you mention this St. Jude's place?
26:12What happened so fast?
26:14I didn't have time to explain.
26:15Well, no, you don't have to.
26:17Mr. Lockett came to see me.
26:20Told me everything.
26:22How he persuaded the police not to press charges,
26:24how he runs a school that turns kids' lives around.
26:27No, that's not true.
26:28Oh, enough, Gabriel.
26:31No more lies.
26:32You found the box in your cupboard.
26:35Eight hundred quid, a stolen money.
26:38And to think that I fell for all that stuff about scratch cards,
26:40you must think I'm so stupid.
26:42No.
26:43No, I just wanted to help.
26:44Help?
26:45There's crowing everything.
26:47Grandma, listen.
26:48No, you listen.
26:50You're the one good thing that's happened to me.
26:53The last thing I want is to see you go into some boarding school,
26:55but they offer you a place,
26:57then you take it.
26:59For your future's sake.
27:00Now, what about your future?
27:06Today's crooked value is cheating.
27:09Remember, cheat, but never cheat your friends.
27:11Gabriel, wait up.
27:15You were serious, then, about leaving?
27:17I thought maybe it was a bluff for Edgar's benefit.
27:23I promised my grandmother I'd never steal again.
27:27She begged me to stay here.
27:29But staying here means learning to steal.
27:32Lying to her.
27:33This is Crookhaven, amigo.
27:36Nothing's as simple as right or wrong.
27:39Here you go, see?
27:41Oh, it's not so frightening, huh?
27:43There you go, Amir.
27:45That gone solid, bro.
27:47Best of luck now.
27:49You keep that chin up.
27:51Come on.
27:52It's time to watch the baby crooklings embarrass themselves.
27:54What's she mean?
27:55Oh, the Crooked Oak.
27:57Trust me, you don't want to miss this.
27:59You can get the boat later if you still want to leave.
28:09I thought you weren't sticking around.
28:11I made up my mind.
28:13Well, you'd better decide soon.
28:14Because once your arrow hits the oak, there's no going back.
28:19For what it's worth, I really hope you stay.
28:24Congrats, I close you, right?
28:30Look, isn't that a mirror to one?
28:33When did she arrive?
28:36Never thought she had the nerve to show her face.
28:38Her brother is a traitor.
28:40Shock him.
28:41Crooklings!
28:42My name is Mr. Velázquez.
28:44It's my honor to teach skullduggery.
28:47You stand where I once stood.
28:50At the start of a long and crooked path.
28:53Once you become crooklings, you will be bound by our sacred values.
28:59Steal, but not from those in need.
29:02Cheat, but never cheat your friends.
29:06Lie, but never to yourself.
29:10From this moment, you are all in competition for this.
29:15The Crooked Cup.
29:16A chance to have your name engraved beside the greatest crooks in history.
29:23For a young crook, there is no higher honor.
29:26No greater way to announce yourself as a talent to be ready.
29:29Every Delacoon has won it since 1910.
29:32Dad's had been practicing five years for this.
29:33I won't let him down.
29:35It's yours to lose, Edgar.
29:36Last holidays, I helped put some bad people away.
29:40Never known a feeling like it.
29:41To this day, each new crookling accepts their place by firing a silver-tipped arrow with your name inscribed upon
29:55it.
29:55How are we supposed to bust out some mad archery skills?
29:58The motive governs the means, Gabriel.
30:02It's not about what you do.
30:06It's about why.
30:07Whoever comes closest to hitting Ezekiel's original arrowhead will win themselves five fucking points.
30:16But because we are a soft touch, we will allow you the best of two.
30:21So, crooklings, step forward and collect your arrow.
30:27Good luck.
30:29May your aim be true.
30:35I want you to know your name is poison and your presence is an insult.
30:41Guessing you're Edgar Delacoon, they warned me about you.
30:45They were right to.
30:48Made a decision yet?
30:50Guess.
30:57Oh dear.
30:58Wrong tree, Mr. Okoro.
31:01After that shockingly poor start, let's hope the next two crooklings fare better.
31:09Hey, at least we hit tree.
31:11Our next two crooklings are Penelope Lockett.
31:17Lockett.
31:18As in.
31:19As in.
31:20The headmaster's daughter.
31:21And Gabriel Avery.
31:24So, we have a merit versus a legacy.
31:27I thought we agreed.
31:28Raw talent needs nurturing, Diego.
31:31This is the best place for him.
31:32Let's be honest.
31:34It's you against me.
31:35Merit doesn't stand a chance.
31:37Neither do you, Edgar.
31:38Please, step forward.
31:45Ever held a bow before?
31:46How hard can it be?
31:51Make me proud.
31:52When have I not?
32:08Penelope, please retrieve your arrow.
32:13She's good.
32:14I'm better.
32:18I'm better.
32:20I'm better.
32:29I don't know.
33:06How hard can it be?
33:10Our next two crooklings are Edgar Delacool and Gia Wu.
33:28Should I tell you how to hold it?
33:29No, I'll figure it out.
33:42I'm Chinese doofus.
33:44Archery's in my DNA.
33:45Bravo, Gia.
33:47A remarkable first shot, especially for a merit.
33:51A little wide.
33:52That's a breeze.
33:53I'll recalibrate.
33:55You can't get beat by a medic.
33:59Come on, Edgar!
34:14You can't get beat by a medic.
34:31What the hell, Duan?
34:32You were aiming at her!
34:34I was lining up the target.
34:35You made me shoot when you barged into me!
34:37You didn't ever shoot someone on purpose.
34:39I guess the rumours about you are true.
34:41You're no legacy.
34:42Arrow!
34:43Bring me Gia's arrow!
34:45Stay where you are.
34:49Move!
34:49Move!
35:04I'm afraid after that unedifying spectacle, Amira has forfeited her term.
35:10Interfering with another crookling shot is strictly forbidden.
35:12I mean, you can't be serious!
35:15Delacoon's the one who should be disqualified.
35:16He tried to shoot Gia.
35:18Amira's the one who saved her.
35:20Hey, don't be a bad sport, Gabriel.
35:22Just because your arrow barely hit the tree.
35:25It was an accident.
35:27Duan knocked into me.
35:43Yes!
35:44Great shot, Edgar!
35:46I believe our winner is Edgar Delacoon.
35:53I wouldn't be so sure.
35:57Meaning?
35:58Do you check the name on the arrow before you fired it?
36:06Mr Lockett, sir, you can't...
36:21The name on the arrow is...
36:24Gabriel Avery!
36:26Gabriel Avery!
36:28I want you to know your name is poison.
36:31And your presence is an insult.
36:34Guessing you're Edgar Delacoon.
36:36They warned me about you.
36:39The master!
36:43The rules state the arrow closest to the mark wins.
36:48This arrow has Gabriel Avery's name on it.
36:57Don't be a bad sport, Edgar.
37:00Just because your arrow barely hit the tree.
37:02That's not fair!
37:03He's making a mockery out of the crooked oak.
37:04How can you let him do this?
37:05He beat you.
37:07Deal with it.
37:13Oh, I'll deal with it.
37:16So you're staying?
37:20Looks that way.
37:22All it took was me almost getting shot.
37:30Good night, Brookhaven.
37:32Sweet dreams.
37:34Sweet dreams.
37:34Sweet dreams.
37:37Sweet dreams.
37:40Sweet dreams.
37:41Do you prayer?
37:48White dreams.
37:52Take down.
37:58Ta Times Square Garden.
38:00How ever?
38:03Tamara and
38:14Another year begins, Caspian.
38:17Another class of eager young crooklings to brainwash.
38:20But a word to the wise.
38:25There's a storm coming.
38:28A storm you can't escape.
38:31And you only have yourself to blame.
38:35So that's how it all began.
38:37I picked his pocket.
38:38He picked mine.
38:40I went to get my lucky coin back and next thing I knew, I was a crookling.
38:47New tie, new jacket, new life.
38:53It felt like maybe my lucky coin had finally brought me some real luck.
38:59Except of course it wasn't luck that brought me here, was it?
39:03It was Caspian Lockett.
39:06And when your headmaster and everyone in your school is a crook, the first lesson you learn,
39:16trust no one.
39:20What has Caspian started?
39:22You're not one of us.
39:23You don't belong here.
39:25I have to utterly humiliate him.
39:27I'm not here to make friends.
39:28I'm here to win.
39:29Game on.
39:29There's a storm coming.
39:32There's a storm coming.
39:33They're nameless.
39:35What's the nameless?
39:37An enemy that hates everything Crook Cave it stands for.
39:40You put the entire crooked network in danger.
39:43Gabriel, get out.
39:45They already have our blood on their hands and they'll burn this place to the ground.
39:49Listen up, losers.
39:50We need your help.
39:51Who cleans?
39:52Assemble.
39:53Leaving so soon.
39:56I thought I was here because I was good.
39:59This is Crook Haven.
40:00Everyone's hiding something.
40:07We're crooks.
40:09Honest is overrated.
Comments