- 20 hours ago
Category
🎥
Short filmTranscript
00:11Love
00:15Exciting and new
00:17Come aboard
00:22We're expecting you
00:25And now
00:31Life's sweetest reward
00:33Let it flow
00:38It floats back to you
00:43Love boat
00:45Soon we'll be making them all run
00:50Love boat
00:53Promises something for everyone
00:59Set a course for adventure
01:02Your mind on a new romance
01:07And love
01:09Won't hurt anymore
01:15It's an open smile
01:19On a friendly shore
01:23It's love
01:28Welcome aboard
01:30It's love
01:37To be continued
01:39To be continued
01:43To be continued
02:08To be continued
02:10To be continued
02:11To be continued
02:20It's always a bad time
02:22Ever since we've been married
02:23Christmas is a bad time
02:24Easter is a bad time
02:25Summer is a bad time
02:27Somebody has to pay the bills
02:28The expensive penthouse apartment
02:30The summer house
02:31The fancy cars
02:33They all cost money
02:34I don't give a damn
02:35About those things, Lucas
02:38Listen, you don't have to go
02:42On this cruise, you know
02:43I mean, nobody's forcing you
02:45I do have to go
02:46I have some thinking to do
02:51Well, uh
02:53I'd better be heading back to town
02:55Aren't you gonna walk me to my cabin?
02:57No, I'm sure it's fine
02:59Besides, I don't want to hit
03:00The freeway traffic
03:01You take care of yourself, huh?
03:06Guess I'll have to
03:07I'll have to go
03:08I'll have to go
03:33Yeah
03:36Well, did you get a good look at her?
03:38Yes
03:39Tell me what makes you suspect
03:40She's running off to me to love her
03:42That is my business
03:43I'm just paying you to watch
03:46It's your money
03:48I just want a full report
03:50In my office next week
03:52You'll collect your fee
03:53I'll collect my fax
03:54And we'll never have to
03:55Set eyes on each other again
03:57That'll suit me fine, Mr. Bradford
04:07Look at that face
04:08Everybody else out there
04:09They're having a good time
04:10Laughing and throwing confetti
04:11What'd you do with my camera?
04:13I had to throw something
04:14You see that, Stella?
04:16Very nice
04:17That's the kind of thing
04:18That's caused our marriage to go
04:19Our marriage hasn't gone
04:21Our marriage has gone
04:23Our marriage has gone
04:24Oh, welcome to the club elegante
04:27Hello, I'm Julie McCoy
04:29Your cruise director
04:29I'm here to see you have a good time
04:31Well, where have you been
04:32For the past 23 years, honey?
04:35We're the Marshalls
04:36You've probably heard of me
04:38Maurice Marshall
04:38The Sausage King
04:40Oh, what a cute card
04:41It's shaped like a little sausage
04:43You ought to see his legs
04:47You're in suite 358
04:49On the Aloha deck
04:50You go up the stairs and out
04:52I hope you and the King
04:54Have a very romantic cruise
04:56Honey, for the past 10 years
04:58The King has been dating
04:59I'd rather be dancing clothes
05:01For repairs
05:01Hold it
05:02Now you see
05:03Now you see what you're doing
05:05We're starting all over again
05:07You're right, you're right
05:07We're just trying to keep our marriage
05:09From going foul
05:10And bitter
05:11And ugly
05:12And repulsive
05:13And nauseating
05:16But all we have is each other
05:18I love you too, sweetheart
05:21Joanne, please
05:21We can work this out
05:23Can't you get it through your head?
05:24I don't want this to work out
05:25Okay, okay
05:26Maybe you don't love me right now
05:27Dale, I never loved you
05:30Joanne, we had a relationship
05:32No, you had a relationship
05:34We had a week at your uncle's beach house
05:36For a week at the beach
05:37I'd have a relationship with your uncle
05:39Joanne
05:39Goodbye, Dale
05:40Joanne, you can't just go off like this
05:42With some guy you met in a car wash
05:43You don't know anything about him
05:44I know everything I have to know about him
05:47He drives a Mercedes
05:48Wait, wait a minute
05:49I need a ticket for this cruise
05:57Who do I see?
05:58Oh, sir, I'm sorry
05:58We're completely booked
06:00Are you sure?
06:01Maybe there's a cancellation
06:02People do that all the time
06:03They make reservations
06:04And they don't show up
06:05Well, yes, I know, sir
06:06But on our cruises
06:07All passengers pay in advance in full
06:10If they're alive, they show up
06:12Oh, well
06:13Maybe somebody died
06:15Would you check for me, please?
06:17Yes, sir
06:17Thank you
06:21You're in luck
06:22Somebody died?
06:24No, I canceled
06:26But I'm afraid you can't have it
06:27Why?
06:28I'm a nice person
06:29I know how to act on a ship
06:31I won't make a nuisance of myself
06:32I won't eat with my hands
06:33I'm sure you won't, sir
06:35Then sell me a ticket
06:36I can't
06:37You're a man
06:38What's wrong with being a man?
06:40Nothing, sir
06:41I happen to be the male persuasion myself
06:43But these particular accommodations involve
06:46Sharing a cabin with another passenger
06:48And she happens to be a woman
06:50Which means we have to sell the space to another woman
06:52All right, look, I understand
06:53But now let me ask you something
06:54What if?
06:55What if?
06:55What if?
06:56Sir
06:58Uh, company policy
07:01We do provide entertainment
07:02But only in the public rooms
07:07I had to be a man
07:08You wanna trade?
07:22What if?
07:38Oh, I have to go
07:44Are you in the public room?
07:44Okay, please
07:47I don't need to go
07:51You're going to go
07:52Oh, it's the place
07:53Our five-day cruise will depart shortly for Puerto Vallada, Cabo San Lucas, and Ensenada.
08:22I, um, is the, uh, bingo...
08:27Never mind, I'll find it.
08:34You're a lucky young lady, Miss Riley.
08:36A man wanted this space, but I couldn't sell it to him.
08:39Just be thankful you're a woman.
08:41Oh, I am, believe me.
08:43I enjoy being a girl.
08:45I bet you the boys enjoy it, too.
08:48Only if I let them.
08:56Be still, my foolish heart.
09:22Oh, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no,
09:26no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no,
09:26no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no,
09:30no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no,
09:34no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no,
09:42no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no
09:53Of course, I could always come back later.
09:58Or I could find another room.
10:00No, no, no, it's not you.
10:04How do you do?
10:06My name is Susan Ridgely.
10:08Hello, I'm pleased to meet you.
10:09My name's Dale, Dale Riley.
10:11Dale, well, I'm sorry that I'm acting this way.
10:15It's just that this, uh, this...
10:21This is my honeymoon.
10:26Shouldn't there be somebody else here?
10:29Yes.
10:31Jerry.
10:33But he didn't show up for the honeymoon.
10:35He didn't even show up for the wedding.
10:38He didn't go to his own wedding?
10:40No.
10:41I can't believe that.
10:43We waited for two hours.
10:46All the candles burnt down.
10:49And the organist was playing requests.
10:54Oh, that's awful.
10:58But I'm sure there must be an explanation.
11:01There is.
11:03On his way to the wedding...
11:05Yeah.
11:06...he stopped off to pick up his tuxedo...
11:09Mm-hmm.
11:10...and he ran off with the girl who rented it to him.
11:15See, I told you there was an explanation.
11:19Oh, the man is an idiot!
11:21I know.
11:22But I love him.
11:24I can't live without him.
11:27No matter what lousy thing he does to me.
11:32So...
11:34I know what you mean.
11:38You do?
11:39Sure.
11:40You see, I was sort of jilted myself.
11:43What's his name?
11:45Joanne.
11:48Joanne!
11:49So I know what you mean.
11:50Oh.
11:53Well...
11:54I guess you and I have a lot in common.
11:57Yeah, we're both just a couple of lovesick girls.
11:59What are you doing?
12:00I'm gonna take a shower.
12:02Here?
12:04Nothing's silly.
12:06In the bathroom.
12:07Oh.
12:08Oh.
12:41Isaac here must be the best bartender on the ship
12:44because he always pours your doubles.
12:46And he always charges your doubles.
12:50Say, freshen that drink up for you?
12:52No, thanks.
12:53You know, you keep sipping that drink like that
12:55and I'm gonna have to have you arrested for loitering.
13:00Hi, we're Carl and Linda Daggett.
13:02Dennis Kingsley.
13:03Hi.
13:06Hi.
13:08I noticed you're sitting alone.
13:10Wouldn't you care to dance?
13:12No, thank you.
13:13I'm expecting someone.
13:15Lucky.
13:16But thank you for asking.
13:35Well, that's it for me.
13:40Good night, Isaac.
13:42You know, after you've been in this business a while,
13:44you get what's known as bartender's ears.
13:46And these bartender's ears could have sworn
13:48they heard you say you were expecting someone.
13:51From now on, I'll have to remember to whisper around those ears.
13:54I just didn't want to hurt the man's feelings.
13:56Oh, I dig.
13:57That's like my grandfather used to say.
13:59Do unto others as you would have them do unto you.
14:05Well, he wasn't the first to say it.
14:09Good night, Isaac.
14:10Good night.
14:12Good night.
14:16Good night.
14:44I'm sorry, sir, but there's no Joanne Dressen on my pad.
14:47I don't know what's going on in the passenger list.
14:48Well, she's probably using his name.
14:49She's using his name?
14:51I mean, she's with a man, Peter something.
14:54Another P, I think, like Piper.
14:56You don't have any Peter Pipers, do you?
14:57I have a Peter Pringle.
14:59That's it.
14:59Peter Pringle.
15:00Picked a peck of peppered shingles?
15:03Tom.
15:04Uh, Pringle, Mr. and Mrs. That's cabin E214.
15:08214, thanks.
15:09By the way, they're not Mr. and Mrs.
15:11Don't you have some kind of a rule about that?
15:13No, not unless one of them complains.
15:22You're making this awful hard, boy.
15:25That's good.
15:27Uh-huh.
15:28Now, now, take the Red Queen, put it on the Black King.
15:30Mm-hmm, that's fine.
15:33Good.
15:34And now, the Black Six on the Red Seven.
15:37That's good.
15:38And now, you can move the Red Five from the third column.
15:42Wait a minute.
15:43Mm-hmm.
15:45And now, the Black Six goes on the Red Seven.
15:48Mm-hmm.
15:49And now, you can move the Red Five from the third column.
15:53And start a new column with the King.
15:57You're doing great.
15:59Oh, I didn't know I was playing.
16:00Oh, I'm sorry.
16:01I can't resist kibitzing.
16:03You've given the word solitaire a whole new meaning.
16:08Maybe, Adam?
16:09Oh, hi.
16:11Anytime you say.
16:12Uh, Jeanette, this is, uh, Greta Wilkes.
16:15I promised to take her on a tour of the ship.
16:19Poor doctors.
16:20You're always on call.
16:21Well, somebody's got to do it.
16:23You're lucky this isn't Wednesday.
16:25I'd be playing golf.
16:50Nice to see you.
16:51Nice to see you.
16:52Nice to see you.
16:54That's a linen club.
16:56Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, yes, I know, silly me.
16:59I thought it was the powder room.
17:00Yes, but, uh, it says linen.
17:03Oh, yes, but when I'm in a hurry for the ladies' restroom, I don't have time to read.
17:08You know how we girls are excused.
17:09Yes, yes, I know, but I must say it's refreshing to find the young lady these days who'll admit it.
17:16Yes.
17:18Isn't it a crime these days what they're doing to the sexes?
17:22Very sad.
17:23If things keep going on like this, we could all end up just one big sex.
17:28Better than no sex at all.
17:32I hope we'll see each other again.
17:34Well, I don't know.
17:35It's such a big ship and all.
17:37Not when you're the captain.
17:51Oh, baby face, my dearest darling, dreamboat, it's dinner time.
17:56Coming, kitten.
18:00Well?
18:01Hey, come on, get dressed.
18:02I'm going to be late.
18:04You think I got all day?
18:05Look, I'm only kidding.
18:07You look beautiful.
18:08Just beautiful.
18:10Mwah!
18:10Let's go.
18:12Oh, almost forgot.
18:14Thought the captain might like one of these party packs of assorted sausages.
18:18Why?
18:19Do you think if he was coming to our house, he would bring us a boat?
18:23Come on, everybody likes Sausage King sausages.
18:26Put them in your pocketbook.
18:27I don't want to put them in my pocket because it'll spoil the line of my tux.
18:31Oh, come on.
18:32I'm ready, I'm ready.
18:34You hold things up.
18:35I told you if you want to look.
18:38You know, I think this cruise is just what our marriage needed, darling.
18:42Yes, we should have done this a long time ago, sweetheart.
18:45I told you, I've been saying, me too.
18:47Good evening.
18:47Oh, good evening.
18:48Good evening.
18:49Oh, it's my favorite.
18:50Now, don't tell me.
18:52What is that?
18:53Chanel No. 5.
18:55Oh.
18:56I thought I smelled sausage.
19:05Here, you take them.
19:07There's nothing wrong with sausage.
19:09Can't you complete just one sentence without using the word sausage?
19:13Oh, I didn't know it bothered you that much.
19:16It didn't seem to bother you when sausages was buying you diamonds and minks.
19:19Oh, no, you loved sausages then, didn't you?
19:21Forget it.
19:22I'm going back to the room.
19:26No, you don't.
19:27We promise to be good to each other.
19:30That's why I'm going back to the room.
19:32Because if I stay here and alone, I'll kill you.
19:37No, we're going to eat with the cat.
19:42I'm going back to the room.
19:54Now, look what you do.
19:55We're stuck.
19:56What am I supposed to do?
19:58Oh, shut up and enjoy the sea air.
20:09Good evening.
20:16Hey, Doc, I can fix you up with that redhead.
20:20On the last night of the cruise, maybe.
20:22Not yet.
20:29Yeah.
20:29Oh, I'm sorry.
20:30I'll let you do that.
20:32Thank you, Thomas.
20:33Uh, we'd like a nice French red wine, please.
20:37Something a little bubbly.
20:41I shouldn't have come.
20:42I mean, it's crazy.
20:44A honeymoon for one.
20:45Look on the bright side.
20:47When you get home, you'll be well-rested.
20:51Jerry was always unpredictable.
20:53We were at a drive-in movie once,
20:55and I went to the snack bar.
20:57But when I got back,
20:58the girl from the box office was in the car with him.
21:01Can you imagine?
21:02I had to stand there eating buttered popcorn
21:05until the movie was over.
21:09When you love someone, you do dumb things.
21:12It's degrading things.
21:14Tell me about it.
21:23Do you know them?
21:27No.
21:29I think he's beautiful.
21:31Maybe a little too beautiful, if you know what I mean.
21:34No way.
21:37Straight arrow.
21:38What?
21:38You can tell by looking at him?
21:40I can tell by the way she's looking at him.
21:43It's the same way I used to look at Jerry.
21:46Jerry.
21:58What's the matter, honey?
21:59Haven't you ever seen red hair before?
22:04I wasn't talking to you.
22:08Hello, hello, hello.
22:10We're stuck in the elevator.
22:14Oh, they can't hear me.
22:15They don't know how lucky they are.
22:17What am I?
22:19Push the emergency button.
22:20I pushed it four times.
22:21You see the crowd in the tractor.
22:23If you was any kind of man,
22:25you'd get us out of here.
22:27Hold on, I have to force open the trap door.
22:30Give me a boost.
22:30What?
22:31Just cup your hands together.
22:33I'll step in them and you boost me up to the roof.
22:35Oh, okay.
22:38You ready?
22:39Yeah.
22:39Okay.
22:40All right.
22:41A little higher.
22:42You're stepping on my fingers.
22:44Lift me off.
22:45If I could lift you,
22:46I would have thrown you overboard this afternoon.
22:49Hey, wait a minute.
22:50Wait a minute.
22:50Wait a minute.
22:51I got a better idea.
22:52You lift me.
22:57Okay.
22:58Let me see.
23:01Easy.
23:02Okay, ready?
23:03Ready?
23:04Yeah.
23:05Okay.
23:08What'll I do now?
23:09Well, force open the trap door.
23:11Climb onto the roof.
23:13Shitty up the cable.
23:15Spring over to the door on the next floor.
23:17Pry it open and then call for help.
23:19Let me down, fool.
23:20I'd rather you step on my fingers.
23:24You must be looking at all my pearls.
23:27My pearls are you, pearls are you?
23:29Your pearls are my back.
23:30You must be some kind of new suit.
23:37I hate anything with starch in it.
23:39I look like a penguin.
23:41Carl's still waiting for the night.
23:43They allow pajama tops in the dining room.
23:45I don't know.
23:46I kind of enjoy getting into this thing.
23:48Makes me feel like it's going to be a big night.
23:50A big night for penguins.
23:52Stop complaining.
23:53You've got the beat to match.
23:55Oh, honey, honey.
23:56Oh, Dennis, I hope you don't mind,
23:59but we invited a terrific girl we met at the pool today
24:01to join us for dinner.
24:03You better warn her to be careful.
24:05The stretch runner's about to hit his stride.
24:09Oh, here she is.
24:14Hi, Jeanette.
24:15Hi.
24:16Say hello to Dennis Kingsley.
24:17Dennis, Jeanette Bradford.
24:18How are you?
24:19Nice to know you.
24:20You look beautiful, Jeanette.
24:24Don't you just love getting dressed for dinner?
24:26It makes me feel so festive.
24:28Yes, Dennis just said the same thing.
24:32Well, we lovers of elegance
24:33are better sick together.
24:34Why?
24:35Oh, I'd love some.
24:37It's a very good year.
24:41What better way to start a very good evening?
24:47To a festive night.
24:49Oh.
24:49Mm-hmm.
25:15How about that?
25:16She's warm for your form.
25:18I'd rather give my body to science.
25:23It's stuck between floors, sir.
25:25The electrician said it's a short in the wiring.
25:27I thought I smelled insulation burning.
25:29I thought I smelled sausages.
25:34So I look out the kitchen window,
25:35and there's my little girl, Missy, who's six,
25:37sitting there very quietly holding a tin can on her hand,
25:40while her brother, Mark, who's nine,
25:42bangs on top of the can with a shovel.
25:44She just sat there.
25:45She didn't say a word.
25:46So I run outside, and I say to her,
25:48how can you sit there like that?
25:50How can you sit there and let him do that to you?
25:52And she just looks up at me with those innocent little eyes
25:54and says, it's okay, Daddy, he's almost through.
25:58Oh, they sound terrific.
26:00Are they just the two?
26:01Oh, are you kidding?
26:04For your sake, I hope those all aren't children.
26:07Yeah, well, they're not.
26:07One's a credit card.
26:08That's how I paid for the children.
26:12There's Missy.
26:13You can tell from the dent in her head.
26:15That's Mark.
26:16Those are the twins, Amy and Jennifer.
26:18They're four.
26:19You better hold on to that credit card you're gonna need.
26:23Oh, is that your wife?
26:24Hmm.
26:25She died two years ago.
26:27If it weren't for the kids, I'd never have made it.
26:30We were pretty close.
26:32She's very beautiful.
26:34And fun.
26:35We did everything together.
26:37Took courses, played tennis,
26:39listened to music, went for long walks.
26:42That's the way it should be.
26:44It's funny.
26:46It's the first time I ever took a trip without her.
26:49We both hated to travel alone.
26:53Oh, I'm sorry.
26:55That was stupid of me.
26:57Well, that's all right.
26:58My husband would have come, but he's very busy.
27:04I think he's very foolish.
27:12Well, it's been lovely.
27:14Thank you for a nice evening.
27:16My pleasure.
27:17Well, say, why don't we have one dance?
27:20Oh, I don't know.
27:20Well, come on now.
27:21We didn't put these glad rags on for nothing, did we?
27:23Besides, if we don't join Carl and Linda,
27:25you know, they're gonna think we fell overboard.
27:28Okay.
27:29Shall we?
27:30All right.
27:48Remember what I said about one dance?
27:50Mm-hmm.
27:51I lied.
27:52I really meant a lot.
28:15I don't want to be alive.
28:17Oh, yes, you do.
28:21No.
28:22I can't live without Jerry.
28:24Well, come on now.
28:25You'll find somebody else.
28:27There's nobody in the world like Jerry.
28:31Oh, Susan.
28:33What?
28:34Don't you have a nightgown?
28:36It was supposed to be my honeymoon.
28:38I didn't think I'd need a nightgown.
28:43Why are your eyes doing that?
28:44Hmm?
28:45Oh, that?
28:46Oh.
28:47Well, that's just a nervous condition.
28:50I'll get you a tranquilizer.
28:52No!
28:52That'll just make me more nervous.
28:55Sleep.
28:55I need sleep.
28:57Either that or a cold shower.
29:00Can we Captain Mary a couple at sea?
29:02Sure he can.
29:03Perfect.
29:04Then he can divorce us.
29:05Oh.
29:05Well, it's too bad he's not trapped in there with us.
29:07Because by the time this door is open,
29:09I can walk out of here a free man.
29:10It depends on what you mean, free.
29:14I've got 20 years invested in this, buster.
29:18And I'm getting my share.
29:20We're going to split it 50-50.
29:23I'll take the car and you take the garage.
29:27No, no, no.
29:28Hold on.
29:28What, you think I'm some kind of idiot?
29:29Okay.
29:30Then you take the garage and I'll take the car.
29:36Okay.
29:36It's a deal.
29:37I want to be fair.
29:38I'll take the kids.
29:40Oh, no, you don't.
29:41Look, I love those kids just as much as you do.
29:44I'll pour out everything I have inside of me out for those kids.
29:47We're going to divide them up two.
29:49You take, uh, what's his name?
29:51And I'll take the short one.
29:53The short one?
29:54You don't even remember her name.
29:56What's the difference?
29:57I know when I see it.
29:59I bet you if we traced our marriage back to the first insult, we'd find out who's to blame
30:03for this mess we're in now.
30:05That's easy.
30:06It was the day we got married.
30:08The minister said, is there any reason why this couple should not be joined in marriage?
30:12And you said, give me a minute.
30:14I'll come up with something.
30:20That was funny.
30:22Your mother thought so, too.
30:23Oh, by the way, you get to keep your mother.
30:26Now, wait a minute.
30:27Let's be fair.
30:32Morrie, you don't really want to divorce, do you?
30:35Who would you have to fight with?
30:37Well, there's always Jack Dawson down at the plant.
30:40Jack Dawson?
30:41You call him a fighter?
30:44He's not even in my class.
30:46Yeah, you're right.
30:47And he can't cook.
30:48Neither can I.
30:50Hey, well, how many things can you do with a sausage?
31:00Marrie, when we were in the cabin and I was saying how much I loved you
31:07and you were saying how beautiful I was, that didn't seem like us.
31:14You know what that is, Del?
31:15Yes.
31:17Some people say it without feeling it, and some people feel it.
31:22without saying it.
31:23Yeah?
31:25Morrie, just once, I want to hear you say it and feel it at the same time.
31:35Oh, I love you, Del.
31:42The Mr. and Mrs. Marshall, my sincere apologies for this inconvenience.
31:46I'm just happy that we finally got you out.
31:50Oh, no, no, no.
31:51No, no, no, no.
31:51Chanel number five.
31:52Sausage.
32:14Here's a book you've got to read
32:15A Moveable Feast
32:16It's Hemingway's best
32:17Oh, it's always been my favorite
32:19You mean you've read it?
32:20I just blew five bucks
32:22Hey, Gopher
32:23Got a book for you
32:24It'll change your whole life
32:26Hey, a Moveable Feast
32:27You can always use another cookbook
32:30Sorry, Gopher, that's my book
32:31It was a present
32:33Well
32:38Let's see
32:40If you're lucky enough
32:41To have lived in Paris
32:42As a young man
32:44Then wherever you go
32:45For the rest of your life
32:46It stays with you
32:48For Paris is a Moveable Feast
32:51A Show-off
33:09Look, honey, I've got to make a call
33:11Grab some rays
33:12And then we'll go back to the cabin
33:14And work up an appetite for lunch, huh?
33:17Oh, Gopher, you're out right
33:18Oh, I love it
33:21Bye-bye
33:29If you ask me, I think he's a bozo
33:31Dale, what are you doing here?
33:32A friend of mine brought me
33:33I'm having an affair with a 747
33:37Joanne, look, I don't care what you've done
33:39I love you and I want you back
33:41Dale
33:41Please, you don't have to say anything
33:43I forgive you
33:44What in the name of
33:45I don't
33:45I do forgive you
33:46Running off with this guy
33:48The do not disturb sign
33:49Working up an appetite for lunch
33:50Everything
33:51I love you
33:52And that's all that matters
33:53Love
33:54You and me
33:55Together
33:55Forever and ever
33:56Amen
33:57Look, Dale
33:58There never was any love
33:59There never will be any love
34:01Zero love, Dale
34:02I don't love you
34:03So what are you trying to tell me?
34:04Dale
34:05You do love this guy?
34:06Who?
34:07Peter Dingle
34:08Pringle
34:09I don't know
34:10Why does everything with you have to be love?
34:12Who says I love anybody?
34:13You know what I love?
34:15I love his Mercedes
34:16And not your jalopy
34:17Goodbye, Dale
34:18And I really mean it this time
34:20Goodbye
34:26That does it
34:27You're the luckiest person I know
34:30How come when I win it's luck
34:31And when you win it's skill
34:32A-cum
34:34Let's see
34:3580 cents for this game
34:37That makes 3.90 you owe me
34:393.90?
34:40Well, I hope you're on master charge
34:42For someone who expected to be miserable
34:44I'm really having a great time
34:46I'm glad
34:47How about another game?
34:49Well, I'm game if you're game
34:51I'm sorry I said that
34:53Here we go
34:56It'd be easy
34:57Just step up on the rail
34:59Jump
35:01And they'd never
35:01Let her find my body
35:04My mother would hate that
35:05She wouldn't have anything to bury
35:11Hey!
35:13Don't!
35:14Let me go!
35:14Why?
35:15Debt is a lousy way to live!
35:16Oh, you don't know anything about it!
35:17I know your mother would hate it
35:18What?
35:19Both your parents
35:20Death always makes them feel like failures
35:22And over what?
35:22Some guy?
35:23It's not worth it
35:24Look, I was just about to do the same thing myself
35:27Over there
35:27I know what I'm talking about
35:29You were?
35:30Yes!
35:30And if you kill yourself
35:31I couldn't kill myself
35:32People would think I'm a copycat
35:34Let me put it another way
35:36Have you ever dived off something this high before?
35:39No
35:39Well, it's gotta be a hundred feet
35:41You could kill yourself
35:43You know, you're right
35:44I could kill myself
35:47Yeah
35:48So how about it, lady?
35:49You wanna get down now?
35:51Yeah
35:51Okay, can I give you a hand?
35:52Yes
35:56Oh, no
36:01Oh
36:02And over, Mark
36:05Well, to me
36:23To me it was love, but to her it was a week at my uncle's beach house.
36:26That's really cold.
36:29No colder than a guy leaving his bride at the altar while he tries on a tuxedo.
36:33Not to mention the girl who rents it.
36:35Well, I guess we're both losers.
36:37Yeah.
36:40You know you haven't even told me your name?
36:42Dale. Dale R-R-R-R-Reinhardt.
36:46Dale? Sure, the second Dale I've met on this ship.
36:48Oh, my roommate's name is Dale.
36:50Susan, we have to talk.
36:53Oh, I'd really love to, Dale. But I really should find Dale.
36:57Um, the other Dale.
36:59You see, I promised to meet her and I don't want her worrying.
37:02She has a nervous condition.
37:04Uh-huh. Well, maybe we can talk over dinner.
37:07Oh, I... I already promised to have dinner with Dale number one.
37:12I'm sure she'd understand.
37:14But I feel terrible.
37:16You see, she's, um, sort of...
37:19Not very attractive.
37:22Oh.
37:24How about after dinner?
37:26Oh, I'd like that.
37:28Yeah?
37:28Yeah.
37:29Nine o'clock?
37:30Great.
37:30I'll see you then.
37:33Maybe even before.
37:37So there we were, Dale and I.
37:40Soaking went in the cabin.
37:41He had just saved my life.
37:43And suddenly...
37:44Suddenly it was as if Jerry never existed.
37:47Now, maybe this other Dale, um...
37:50Maybe it's just that he was in the right place at the right time.
37:54Maybe that's why you think he's attractive.
37:56You do think he's attractive, don't you?
37:58Oh, yes.
38:00And kind.
38:01And strong.
38:03And...
38:03To tell you the truth, if I hadn't been afraid that you might walk in, I might have...
38:13I would have...
38:15You wouldn't have.
38:16I know that's not like me at all, but that's what I wanted to do.
38:21Oh.
38:22Oh.
38:23You're a woman.
38:26Well...
38:26I mean, we have feelings like that, too.
38:31Sometimes, when you see a total stranger, you know, like in the supermarket, and he really
38:37does something to you.
38:39But you're a woman, so you're not supposed to feel things like that, so you pretend he's
38:42not there.
38:43No matter how he makes you feel, you never do anything about it.
38:47You do something about it at a supermarket, they won't cash your checks anymore.
38:54Dale.
38:56Could you do something for me?
38:59Anything.
39:00Anything.
39:01Tonight.
39:02Do you think you could...
39:05Um...
39:06Find someplace else to sleep?
39:09Are you serious?
39:10Are you serious?
39:13You understand.
39:26Well, it's almost nine o'clock.
39:27Is it?
39:28Yes.
39:29I'll see you tomorrow.
39:30And thank you.
39:31Oh.
39:32Thank you, Dale.
39:35Oh.
39:36No problem.
39:37Susan, if it'll make you happy, believe me, it'll make me happy.
39:43Thanks.
39:46Miss Riley.
39:47Yeah?
39:47You walked right past my table and didn't even say hello.
39:51Oh, Captain, I'm sorry.
39:52You are not trying to ignore me, are you?
39:55Moi?
39:56Oh, Captain, I was looking for someone else.
39:57Miss Riley.
39:58I think it's time you and I got to know each other better.
40:02Better.
40:11Excuse me, Julie.
40:14Yes?
40:15Julie, I'm waiting for a passenger.
40:16A Mr. Dale Reinhardt, who's late.
40:19Would you by any chance know what cabin he's in?
40:21Well, I don't write off hand, but I can certainly check for you.
40:24I'll be right back.
40:41I'll be right back.
40:42The days are going by too quickly.
40:43Yes, they are.
40:45I find myself counting how little is left rather than how much is ahead.
40:50Tomorrow cover some, Lucas.
40:51And the next stop, home.
41:10No, this is wrong.
41:13I was wrong to start something I can't finish.
41:16My heart keeps saying yes.
41:19But I'm old-fashioned, Dennis.
41:22I made a vow once and that means something to me.
41:26Juliette, you...
41:27I couldn't be happy if I deceived Lucas.
41:30No matter how bad my marriage is...
41:34You do understand that, don't you?
41:37Once trust and respect are gone, there's nothing left.
41:47Look, Jenna, there's something I have to tell you.
41:49Please, don't tell me anything, okay?
41:58I really appreciate you showing me the bridge in your office, Captain.
42:02Yes, this is where it all happens, Miss Riley.
42:04The buck stops here.
42:06Fascinating, but I do have to go.
42:08But you haven't seen any of my radar equipment.
42:11How much can a girl take in one night?
42:15Miss Riley, a man gets very lonely at sea.
42:19Yes, I can imagine.
42:21We must discuss it sometime, tomorrow.
42:24Tomorrow?
42:25Yes, can we discuss it tomorrow?
42:27Tomorrow's one of my favorite days.
42:29It might be one of my favorite days.
42:32Four bells, my office.
42:34Fine, I'll see you then.
42:35Bye-bye.
42:36Bye.
42:36Bye-bye.
42:56Somebody stole my clothes.
43:00Damn.
43:02Oh, hi.
43:03I'm sorry I took so long, but...
43:05There's no Mr. Reinhardt on the ship.
43:08It figures.
43:10You'd think I'd learn by now, wouldn't you?
43:12I mean, all men do is lead you on.
43:14They tell you things that they think you want to hear,
43:16and you can never believe anything they say.
43:18Do you know what?
43:19I bet that he wasn't even going to kill himself either.
43:26Oh, Dale, he didn't show up.
43:28He didn't? No.
43:29Oh, you poor dear.
43:31I thought he was going to be different.
43:32He turns out to be just as rotten as the rest of us.
43:34I thought about him.
43:35Yes.
43:35He's a wonderful person.
43:37From what you've told me about him.
43:40Oh.
43:40Come, Susan.
43:41Let me take you back to the cabin.
43:47Oh, Dale.
43:48What am I going to do?
43:50Shh, shh, shh.
43:51Nobody wants me.
43:53First Jerry.
43:55Now Dale.
43:57The other Dale.
43:59Oh, Dale.
44:03Oh, Dale.
44:09Oh, Dale.
44:14I had a cinnamon one this morning.
44:16It was really good.
44:17Cinnamon and raisins.
44:18Do you have that one?
44:19Yes.
44:20Pardon me.
44:21Would you like a Danish?
44:22No, I'm looking for a passenger, Mr. Dennis Kingsley.
44:25I tried his room and he wasn't there.
44:26And he wasn't at breakfast today.
44:28No.
44:28Mr. Kingsley went ashore.
44:29He decided to fly back to Los Angeles.
44:34Hi.
44:40Hi.
44:40I'd like to book passage on this same cruise in two weeks.
44:43Certainly, sir.
44:44Well, you must have really enjoyed it.
44:46Yes.
44:47I mean, I did.
44:49Well, it's funny.
44:50I tried to meet all the passengers on this ship and I don't seem to remember meeting
44:53you.
44:54Oh, well, I stayed in my cabin most of the time.
44:58That's a reservation for Mr.
45:00But, you know, you do look familiar to me.
45:03Looks familiar to me, too, sir.
45:04Yes.
45:05Are you sure we haven't met?
45:08Positive.
45:09But I do remember peeking out of my cabin one night and seeing you by the linen closet
45:14with a big red head?
45:18Well, yes, yes.
45:19As I said, I try to meet everyone.
45:23That's a reservation for Mr. and Mrs. Dale Reinhardt.
45:26Oh, you're married?
45:27No, but I will be by then.
45:28I'll see you in two weeks.
45:29Bye.
45:34Couldn't be.
45:35No.
45:38Couldn't be.
45:56Thank you, Julie.
45:57It was a wonderful trip.
45:58We really enjoyed it.
46:00Oh, good.
46:00Hey, I'm sorry about the elevator.
46:02Oh, forget it.
46:03Come on.
46:03I'm in a hurry.
46:03Get over and see my little fellas.
46:05Oh, my children.
46:06No, my sausages.
46:07Oh, my goodness.
46:22Jeanette, I have to explain.
46:23You don't have anything to explain.
46:25Please, hear me out.
46:28I came back for two reasons.
46:30The first is something I should have told you long ago.
46:32I tried on deck the other night, but...
46:37Look.
46:40Your husband hired me to take this cruise to watch you.
46:48I flew back to Los Angeles and gave him his money back.
46:51He told me you're the best wife a man could have.
46:57The second reason I'm here is...
46:58I had to tell you I love you.
47:03I know how you must feel, but...
47:05If in time you...
47:10Why would...
47:12I'll be waiting.
47:45I'll be waiting.
47:45Hi. How did it go?
47:46Hello, Lucas.
47:48Well, how did it go?
47:50Did you, uh...
47:51Did you meet any interesting new people?
47:53Just one man.
47:54Your man.
48:04Look, Jeanette, uh...
48:06Why don't we, uh...
48:08Why don't we go back to the house and, uh...
48:10See if we can't talk things out, okay?
48:12There's nothing left to talk about.
48:17There's nothing left to talk about.
48:18In a way, you did me a favor.
48:22I'll check into a hotel.
48:23Goodbye, Lucas.
48:42Oh, taxi!
48:49Can I give you a look?
48:52Yes, I think I need one.
48:57Jeanette?
49:01It's the least you can do, seeing you still owe me $390 for backgammon.
49:21The End
49:23The End
49:26The End
49:37THE END
50:03THE END
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