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00:00Let's see what I am doing tonight.
00:02Best-selling musical artist.
00:04Nate's parents did not let him listen to rock and roll.
00:07Man.
00:08If he knows a lot of these, he's going to get grounded.
00:10Cat Stevens.
00:11Billy Ray Cyrus.
00:13Michael W. Smith.
00:15Amy Grant.
00:16Amy Grant.
00:18Golly.
00:20From the Nashville Municipal Auditorium,
00:23it's the only comedy show that also happens to be a game show.
00:27The Greatest Average American.
00:32And now, your host, Nick Byrnes.
00:39Thank you very much.
00:41Thank you so much.
00:43Welcome to our new show where it's not about what you know.
00:46It's about what your fellow average American knows.
00:50Speaking of average, we've got my buddy and fellow comedian,
00:53Julian McCullough, warming up the audience tonight.
00:59And our announcer and fellow comedian, Greg Ward.
01:05Greg, who do we have playing tonight?
01:07A retired meteorologist from the Sunshine State of Florida.
01:11Let's welcome Linda.
01:15A former delivery driver from Chicago, Illinois, it's Chris.
01:23And last but not least, a fly fisher and newlyweds from the land of 10,000 lakes, that's Minnesota, it's
01:30Kayla!
01:34Wow.
01:35And you just like go stay, you wear the things.
01:37You know it, you know the, yeah, and you're in the stream.
01:40I got the waders, yeah.
01:42A lot of bear?
01:43I have run into bears, and it's tough because we're both looking for the same thing in the river, usually.
01:49So you gotta watch your, you know, watch your back.
01:51All right, that's very, that's very exciting.
01:54All right, let's get to the game.
01:56We're going to play through two elimination rounds, with one person going home after each one.
02:02Last player standing earns the title of the greatest average American, and moves on to our bonus round,
02:08where you could win the average American salary of $67,920.
02:16There we go.
02:17In our first round, we asked Americans questions about how they feel, what they like, and how they live.
02:25I'll reveal the questions, and all you have to do is choose the response said by the majority of Americans.
02:31These first two questions are worth one point each.
02:34Here's your first question.
02:37We asked 100 average American pizza delivery drivers, which of these would be the worst place to deliver a pizza?
02:46Airport baggage claim.
02:48B, seventh floor walk up.
02:51C, a dog park.
02:53D, your ex's house.
02:56That one came, 10 seconds.
02:58That one, that one came out of nowhere.
03:03Um, I deliver pizzas.
03:09Chris, what did you say?
03:11Okay, I said B.
03:13Yeah, seventh floor.
03:137th floor walk up.
03:14Now, I'm not a pizza delivery, but I did do Uber Eats.
03:17Yeah.
03:17So I did Uber Eats and DoorDash, and that seventh floor, even with the elevator, it's just so long.
03:22Like, don't nobody want to do that.
03:23Uber Eats and DoorDash, that's like your world, right?
03:26No.
03:27But yeah, keeping a job is pretty hard for me.
03:29I know it's not your world, but I mean, it is made for people that have trouble keeping a job.
03:34You are damn hard.
03:35It's got, if they would have had that in my day, oh my goodness.
03:39Come on now.
03:41Literally, we make our own schedule.
03:43Oh, it's the best.
03:44You know what I'm saying?
03:44It's the best.
03:45All right, Linda.
03:47I'm right with Chris on this.
03:49I don't think there's any way I want to be climbing seven floors to deliver a pizza up and down.
03:55No way.
03:55Kayla?
03:56I also said B.
03:58Seventh floor walk up.
03:59We're all in sync.
04:00But I mean, it was like, do you got to, like, go through TSA with the pizza?
04:04Are they checking it?
04:05Not a baggage claim.
04:06And then ex's house, I was like, there could be some people out there wishing their ex would make them
04:10come deliver pizza because maybe they don't want anything to do with them.
04:12So, I was confident.
04:13Seventh floor walk up.
04:14You're not trying to carry that all the way up there.
04:16All right.
04:17Well, let's find out.
04:19Did the average American audience agree with you?
04:22What did they say?
04:25Seventh floor walk up.
04:28One point for each.
04:30Yay!
04:31We all in.
04:32I'll go with me.
04:33All right.
04:34This one's a little different.
04:35You're guessing the percentage of people from zero to 100.
04:38Gotcha.
04:38All right.
04:39Whoever comes closest to the correct answer gets the point.
04:44We asked 100 average Americans if you won $67,920 on a game show.
04:51And then a good friend asked if they could have $10,000.
04:55Would you give it to them?
04:56What percent said yes?
04:59Ten seconds.
05:02Y'all might be finding out.
05:10Oh, God.
05:11Kayla, let's start with you on this one.
05:13This one was tough because I wanted to answer what I would do, but I had to take myself out
05:17of it.
05:17I would say yes if I win.
05:19Don't call me, guys.
05:21But I put 36%, which I feel like was kind of high, but now that I turned it, I'm like,
05:27maybe that's low.
05:28It's an aggressive amount.
05:29It is.
05:30Chris.
05:30Okay, so I went with 38%.
05:33Wow.
05:34Right at each other.
05:34I know.
05:35Nerve's wrecking.
05:36But $10,000, that's a lot of money.
05:38That's a lot of money.
05:38If I got $60,000 and you asked for $10,000?
05:41It's nuts.
05:42You're not getting that.
05:43I bet you couldn't wait to tell them no.
05:45Oh, no.
05:46I'm going to be like, girl, can we lower with him?
05:48I don't give you $1,000, but no.
05:49Yeah, yeah.
05:50All right.
05:51Uh, Linda?
05:52I feel really cheap right now.
05:57Okay, somebody had to go low.
05:58Yes.
05:59So, there you go.
06:017%.
06:02Wow.
06:02No save.
06:04It's not her.
06:05It's what...
06:05I know there's people clapping.
06:08Thank you, thank you.
06:09It's a chunk.
06:11It's $10,000.
06:12I agree.
06:13That's a lot of money.
06:15I think it's crazy.
06:15I think your friend has a problem.
06:18Yeah, that's a good job.
06:19Okay.
06:20I agree.
06:21Look, I'm excited to see what happens.
06:23What percent said yes?
06:25Oh, yes.
06:2863%!
06:30Trish, got it?
06:31Got it!
06:33Humanity has been restored.
06:35That's unbelievable.
06:36Wow.
06:37That's not a complete lie.
06:38Those people are lying.
06:40Wow.
06:41All right.
06:41Good job.
06:42But good.
06:42You know what?
06:43We've got some good people out there.
06:44All right.
06:44Just two questions left.
06:46I'm going to raise the stakes a little,
06:48so this next one is worth two points.
06:51We asked 100 average Americans,
06:53who has the easiest job at the North Pole?
06:57A, Santa.
06:58B, the elves.
07:00C, reindeer.
07:02D, Miss Claws.
07:06Ten seconds.
07:08I don't know.
07:10I don't know.
07:11I don't know.
07:17All right.
07:19Chris, you're at two points.
07:21Linda and Kayla, you're at one point.
07:23Linda?
07:24I went with the reindeer because basically they just work one day.
07:30I feel like throwing Mrs. Claus in there was totally, very tricky.
07:35It's tricky.
07:36No guy can say Mrs. Claus.
07:38You can't.
07:39You just can't.
07:40Yeah.
07:40You can't say the truth out here.
07:42You know what I mean?
07:42Hey, hey, hey.
07:43It does.
07:44No, I'm joking.
07:45You can't say that for real.
07:46But the reindeer, they're flying all over the world in 24 hours.
07:51That's a lot.
07:51But that's, but yes.
07:53But that's only one day the reindeer work.
07:54That's one day.
07:55It's a big day.
07:56I went with the reindeer.
07:57Yeah, yeah.
07:58That's right.
07:58Reindeer.
07:59All right.
08:00Chris?
08:00Oh, okay.
08:01I went with D, Mrs. Claus.
08:03Oh!
08:04Look, I think.
08:05Okay, let me give my reasoning.
08:06Because Santa, he got a lot going on.
08:09The elves are the real hard workers.
08:11And reindeer, that's a lot of work flying in the air.
08:14Shout out to them.
08:15So, Mrs. Claus, she's just making everybody feel good.
08:18So, she's like the real housewives of the North Pole.
08:20Yeah.
08:20Yeah.
08:20She is the real housewife.
08:22You know, she's the ultimate housewife diva down.
08:24Yeah.
08:25So, I went with Mrs. Claus.
08:26I mean, do you want to change your answer because of what Chris said?
08:30That's how good it was.
08:31I did a great job.
08:33Kayla?
08:34Clearly, it was a women's trend.
08:35I said reindeer.
08:36Yeah.
08:37Reindeer.
08:38I mean, the reindeer are bred for it.
08:39They're probably looking forward to that one day.
08:41They get to fly around.
08:42I'm with you.
08:43There's no song for Mrs. Claus, though.
08:45No, no, no.
08:45If she's doing all this work, why, she ain't got no song?
08:48You know what I'm saying?
08:49Look.
08:49Where's the song with Mrs. Claus in it?
08:51If she's the hardest working.
08:53She should write one.
08:54I think it's Mrs. Claus.
08:55All right.
08:56We asked the 100 average Americans, what did they say?
09:02Santa.
09:02Wow.
09:03Hey.
09:04Good night.
09:06Oh, my gosh.
09:06I don't even.
09:08Well, I guess.
09:0840% said Santa.
09:11Is that crazy?
09:12Miss Claus, 34%.
09:13Oh, wow.
09:15I agree.
09:16That's because you just can't say Miss Claus.
09:18You can.
09:19All right.
09:20Chris has got two points.
09:22Linda, one point.
09:23Kayla, one point.
09:24This is the last question.
09:25Uh-oh.
09:26It is worth a whopping three points.
09:31We asked 100 average American Olympic fans if you had to compete in one of these Olympic
09:37sports with exactly one week of training, which would you do the best at?
09:44Okay.
09:45A, wrestling.
09:46B, synchronized swimming.
09:49C, break dancing.
09:51D, pole vault.
09:5410 seconds.
09:54Oh, my gosh.
09:57Last question.
09:58It all comes to this.
09:59Greg, you were a Division I wrestler.
10:02I was, Nate.
10:03That was the old me.
10:04I would go break dancing.
10:05Time's up.
10:08All right.
10:09This all comes down to this.
10:10Oy.
10:11I know.
10:11I'm scared.
10:12I know.
10:13Kayla, what did you say?
10:14I panic ordered.
10:16I don't want to do any of these.
10:17I was hoping curling was going to be up there.
10:19Yeah.
10:19I picked wrestling.
10:22I needed that, guys.
10:24All right.
10:25Chris.
10:26I went with break dancing.
10:28See.
10:28Yeah.
10:29I think you could do it.
10:30I think you could do that.
10:30I know.
10:31That's why a lot of people talk about it being an Olympic sport.
10:35In fact, we think we could teach it in a week.
10:39Linda.
10:40I did go with the break dancing.
10:42Break dancing.
10:43This makes this interesting.
10:45I just don't think you have to be that good at it.
10:47I mean, you don't have to.
10:48No, it's hard to tell if someone's a good dancer.
10:50It is hard.
10:50But you got to win.
10:52I don't know.
10:52All right.
10:53This is a big one.
10:54It all comes down to this one.
10:55We got two break dancing.
10:57One wrestling.
10:59What did the average American say?
11:04Wow!
11:05That's crazy.
11:07Wrestling.
11:07Come on, Deva.
11:08Let's go.
11:09Wrestling.
11:10I did not see that.
11:12I'm going to wrestle right now after that.
11:13Like, what?
11:13All right.
11:14Congratulations, Chris and Kayla.
11:17You're moving on.
11:20Unfortunately, Linda, you are the most below-average American tonight.
11:24Thank you so much for playing.
11:27With the greatest average American return,
11:29our players will be predicting how average I am
11:32at throwing football.
11:34Do not go anywhere.
11:37Woo!
11:38Woo!
11:39Woo!
11:39Woo!
11:39Woo!
11:40Woo!
11:43Woo!
11:47Welcome back to The Greatest Average American.
11:50Chris and Kayla are one step closer
11:53to playing for the average American salary
11:55of $67,920.
11:58Woo!
11:59Woo!
12:01Woo!
12:01Woo!
12:01Woo!
12:01Woo!
12:02Woo!
12:03Woo!
12:03All right.
12:04This next round is all about getting into the mind
12:06and body of the original Greatest Average American himself,
12:09and that is myself.
12:13Tonight, I am playing armchair quarterback.
12:18I will be seated in this comfy recliner
12:20and tossing footballs at these targets.
12:23I've got 60 seconds to nail as many as I can.
12:26And to figure out who's going to the bonus round,
12:29you two are predicting how I'm going to do.
12:31One of you will start off by guessing exactly how many
12:34I can make in 60 seconds.
12:36The other will then write over if you think
12:39I will make more than that,
12:41or under if you think I will make less.
12:44Kayla, you scored the highest in the first round,
12:46so you get to decide.
12:48I will be doing the over-under.
12:50Wow.
12:50Only the numbers to you, Chris.
12:52There we go.
12:53Chris, how many footballs do you think
12:55I can get into these targets in 60 seconds?
12:58Write down your guess and show everybody except me.
13:01I do not want to see.
13:03Don't show me.
13:12All right.
13:13Kayla, you saw how many he said I would hit in 60 seconds.
13:16Do you think I'll go over that number or under it?
13:19Write down your guess and don't show anyone.
13:25All right.
13:25Answers are in.
13:26It's my time to shine.
13:28Greg, a little help.
13:29All right.
13:30Good luck, Nate.
13:3360 seconds on the clock, please.
13:37On your mark.
13:40Oh, boy.
13:41Get set.
13:44Paint!
13:46He's got more.
13:51Yeah!
13:56I got so hard.
13:59It's kind of mean.
13:59I got so hard.
14:00Eight more.
14:0135 seconds.
14:01Unbelievable.
14:02You've got two.
14:03Oh, I'm a ghost.
14:05Let's get down to the way.
14:07Oh, baby.
14:0830 seconds.
14:09Why don't you have your best shot?
14:13Oh, baby.
14:1630 seconds, Dave.
14:17You're halfway home.
14:18He's on fire.
14:20Oh, baby.
14:2520 seconds, Dave.
14:2620 seconds, Dave.
14:26You have eight.
14:27I'm a ghost, baby.
14:27You have the best shot.
14:3010 seconds.
14:31You have ten.
14:3510 seconds, Dave.
14:37You have 11.
14:50All right.
14:51All right.
15:05I shouldn't make that chip, bud.
15:09How many did I get?
15:1013.
15:1113?
15:12A solid 13?
15:13Not bad.
15:14I feel good.
15:15I feel good.
15:17All right.
15:18Chris, how many did you think I could do?
15:22All righty.
15:22So I went with 20 A's.
15:24I should have done 20 A's.
15:27Kayla, if you guessed under, you win.
15:30But if it's over, then you're going home.
15:32What did you say?
15:34I said under.
15:34Yeah!
15:38That means Kayla is moving on.
15:41Congratulations.
15:42You are the greatest average American,
15:45and you deserve a little something to go with your new title.
15:48How does $10,000 sound?
15:51But can she turn it into $67,920?
15:57Fun down in the bonus round when we return to the greatest average American.
16:04Hey!
16:13Welcome back.
16:14I'm here with our winner, Kayla.
16:17She has earned the coveted title of the greatest average American, and with that comes $10,000.
16:23Woo!
16:25There you go.
16:26There you go.
16:27That's yours to keep no matter what.
16:29But you now have a chance to increase your winnings to the average American salary of $67,920.
16:40And I, look, I know what everybody's thinking, especially the non-fun people.
16:45Well, you gotta pay the taxes on all that money if you win it.
16:48Not on my game show!
16:50I'm gonna put a little extra in to help cover all your taxes.
16:57What?!
16:57Yes!
16:58What will you do, uh, if you win it?
17:01I would take a dream trip that I've wanted to do for my entire life that is going to Scotland.
17:07I am Scottish, the Lockhart name, and I've dreamed of this trip for my entire life.
17:12Me and my husband got married in May, and we never got a chance to take a honeymoon.
17:16Is your husband here?
17:17He is!
17:18He's the most handsome man in the crowd!
17:21There he is!
17:22Look at that.
17:24If I had to guess a man to marry a fly fisherman, that's who, that's what I bet he looks
17:29like.
17:29All right.
17:31You showed you can think like the average American, but there's one more group of average Americans you need to
17:36face, and that's our audience.
17:39Before the show, we asked them seven questions.
17:42You'll have 30 seconds to correctly predict how the majority of them answered.
17:47Get five right, and you'll go home with $67,920.
17:52But beware, because it's three strikes and you're out.
17:56All right, audience.
17:58It's your answers that are helping win this money, so you should have some skin in the game.
18:02If Kayla wins, you're all going home with one of my favorite things.
18:05Julian, what are they getting?
18:06We're doing two backstage tours of the Grand Ole Opry.
18:11All right.
18:12Oh, my gosh!
18:14Wow!
18:15That's nice.
18:18The Grand Ole Opry.
18:19It's amazing. Look at it.
18:20It's amazing.
18:21You know, my first, I used to sweep the steps in that place.
18:24I'd be all serious.
18:25You laughed, and it was serious.
18:27But dead serious.
18:27That's when I would go back to when this falls apart.
18:31Yeah.
18:31I'll be able to win and let you guys see where he swept the floors.
18:34We're going to go see it.
18:35All right.
18:35Remember, three strikes, you're out.
18:37That's right.
18:39Five right, and you're going home with $67,920.
18:43Yes.
18:4530 seconds on the clock.
18:47Do you feel good?
18:48Yes!
18:49I feel fantastic.
18:50I'm about to change my life in 30 seconds.
18:52All right.
18:53Here we go.
18:55What did this audience enjoy more at Thanksgiving, the football or the food?
18:59Food.
19:01Have they ever gotten a piercing?
19:03Yes.
19:04How do they wear their baseball cap?
19:07Do they have a landline?
19:10Which chore do they like better?
19:12Laundry.
19:14Who do they think they would win in a fight, Godzilla or King Kong?
19:17King Kong!
19:20Would they rather be complimented on their looks or their brains?
19:22Brains.
19:23Brains.
19:24All right.
19:24Seven questions.
19:25There we go.
19:26We did it.
19:30All right.
19:31You feel good?
19:32You excited?
19:33I feel very confident about some.
19:35Yeah.
19:35And very, uh, definitely panic ordered on some.
19:39All right.
19:39Well, look, the first one.
19:41What does this audience enjoy more at Thanksgiving, the football or the food?
19:45You feel confident or you feel panicked?
19:47Could you picture Thanksgiving without the food?
19:49I feel like most of the people in the audience are with me.
19:52I agree.
19:52All right.
19:52All right.
19:53Well, let's find out.
19:54You said food.
19:55Did the audience say food?
19:57Yes!
19:57There we go.
19:59There we go.
20:01All right.
20:02Oh, man.
20:03Have they ever got a piercing?
20:05Pretty much every woman has their ears for ears.
20:07Yeah.
20:08And I'm hoping there's a lot of female in here answering.
20:11Yeah.
20:12Uh, all right.
20:13I'm scared.
20:13You said yes.
20:14I know.
20:15I did.
20:16There's no going back.
20:16Let's see.
20:17Let's see.
20:17Did they say yes?
20:18Come on.
20:20Yes!
20:21All right.
20:23All right.
20:25Oh, man.
20:27How do they wear their baseball cap?
20:28Ford backwards?
20:29You said Ford.
20:30Did they say Ford?
20:33Yes!
20:34Yes!
20:34Look at this.
20:37Three for three.
20:40Holy buckets.
20:41Do they have a landline phone at home?
20:46I would have loved for it to be yes.
20:48We all want to, right?
20:50Yeah.
20:50Everybody.
20:51Oh, that was the days.
20:52Yes.
20:52Those were the days.
20:54Uh, you said no.
20:56In this day and time.
20:57Did the audience say no as well?
21:00Come on.
21:00Yeah!
21:02Yeah!
21:03Cool!
21:08Oh, man.
21:12All right.
21:14Four for four.
21:16I know.
21:16My heart's pounding.
21:17You need one more to win $67,920.
21:24It's crazy.
21:25Oh, my gosh.
21:27Let's see.
21:28We got, uh...
21:28No pressure.
21:29Which chore do they like better?
21:31I don't know.
21:31Which one do you want to go to?
21:33Do we kind of want to see who would win in a fight?
21:36Um...
21:37Yeah, let's go.
21:37Let's go.
21:38That's the main thing.
21:38I feel like...
21:39I mean, King Kong, they're both scary.
21:40Don't get me wrong.
21:41But I feel confident.
21:42I feel confident.
21:43All right.
21:44To win the average American salary,
21:48did the audience say King Kong?
22:00All right.
22:02Oh, that's so great.
22:04Oh, that's so happy.
22:05That's so awesome.
22:07Congratulations.
22:08You feel awesome.
22:08Yeah, look at you all.
22:10Hey!
22:11All right.
22:13Congratulations, Kayla.
22:15You've won $67,920.
22:19And audience, you know what that means?
22:22Everybody's going home with a pair of tickets for the Grand Ole Aubrey backstage tour.
22:26When we come back, three new players will battle out to see who's the most average.
22:31Don't go anywhere.
22:33The greatest average American will be right back.
22:36Congratulations.
22:38Yeah.
22:39That's awesome, man.
22:41That's so awesome.
22:42Oh, my God.
22:43Thank you so much.
22:43We're going to Scotland.
22:45By the way, she went seven for seven.
22:47Got all of them right.
22:48Oh, my God.
22:58Welcome back to The Greatest Average American.
23:01Our pursuit of average continues with three new contestants.
23:05Let's see who we've got.
23:08Rick.
23:08Tonight, we have a father of three and a teacher from the great state of Wisconsin.
23:12It's Kevin.
23:13Hi, Luke.
23:18Next, it's a newlywed from my hometown of St. Louis, Missouri.
23:22Please welcome Natalie.
23:27And last but not least, we have an auto mechanic from the great state of New York.
23:31Give it up for Armani.
23:40Armani.
23:41Armani.
23:42If Armani was your last name, we wouldn't even be here, would we?
23:46No, I'd be famous somewhere in Italy.
23:47Yeah, yeah.
23:48Tell me, what are you most above average at?
23:51I am most above average at collecting exotic animals.
23:53Really?
23:54I have a leopard gecko, a bearded dragon, and a variety of exotic tarantulas.
23:58Yeah.
23:58At one point in time, I had 450 tarantulas in my room that I used to breed.
24:03You're a fun one to live with.
24:05I like it.
24:06I sure am.
24:06Let's get to the game.
24:08Woo!
24:08Yeah!
24:10Let's do it.
24:10Great.
24:11Let's do it.
24:12These first two questions, they're all worth one point each.
24:15Here's your first question.
24:17We asked a hundred average married Americans.
24:21Which of these is most likely to start an argument in your house?
24:26A, dishes left in the sink.
24:29B, making plans without asking.
24:31C, watching a head on a TV show.
24:35D, thermostat.
24:36You got 10 seconds.
24:39I'm currently in all four of these fights.
24:43I'm hidden for the cycle, as they say.
24:49Natalie, I kind of want to hear from you first, because you are newly married.
24:54Yeah, two months ago.
24:55Wow.
24:56My husband's right there.
24:58There we go.
25:00Yeah.
25:01So, what did you say?
25:02And I don't know if you had time to get in these fights, but maybe.
25:05You know, this feels familiar to me.
25:08I went with A, dishes left in the sink.
25:10Left in the sink.
25:11You know, I might be speaking from experience on that one.
25:13That's true.
25:13You hear that?
25:14Yeah.
25:15He knows what I would pick on that one.
25:18Kevin, how'd you go?
25:19I went with B, making plans without asking.
25:23Yeah.
25:23I've been known to just say, hey, I'm going to go do this, by the way.
25:28Oh, yeah.
25:28And you could be like, what?
25:29Kevin, let me tell you.
25:30We just met, but if I was asked how to describe you, I would say, making plans without asking.
25:37That's the, I think you're a fun time.
25:39And you're like, let's go.
25:41Armani.
25:41I feel like you have possibly all this going on.
25:45It's, I mean, you got the thermostat could be whack with these animals.
25:50So, what did you say?
25:52So, I went with option C, watching ahead on a TV show.
25:55Watching ahead on a TV show.
25:56That's our one time to bond together.
25:58How dare you get ahead and watch it?
26:00Yeah, exactly.
26:00Because that's just not right.
26:01All right.
26:01I like it.
26:02We asked 100 average married Americans.
26:04Let's see what they said.
26:06What did they say?
26:08Making plans without asking Kevin.
26:13Good job.
26:14What was second place, Drew?
26:15Dishes left in sync.
26:17Okay.
26:17There we go.
26:18There we go.
26:19Watching ahead was Lou.
26:22Wow.
26:23The one that was before it was Don't Own Reptiles.
26:26That wasn't even on there.
26:27Yeah.
26:28No.
26:28Next question, please.
26:31We asked 100 average Americans which animal would make the best non-traditional pet.
26:39Armani, buddy.
26:40Raccoon.
26:41B. Flamingo.
26:43C. Alpaca.
26:45D. Sea Otter.
26:4710 seconds.
26:48Armani, this is built for you.
27:00I mean, I think we're all waiting on one answer.
27:02All right.
27:04And it's starting to be...
27:05Well, obviously, I'm gonna go first.
27:06I picked alpaca.
27:07Alpaca, yes.
27:08Me, I love animals.
27:09And if I come into a house and there's an alpaca there, it would make my day because
27:12they're one of the cutest animals.
27:13If an alpaca came in your house, how long would it survive?
27:17Honestly, if the alpaca stayed away from that one room, it would have a great life.
27:21Well, the whole point is I want to know what happens if it gets to the room.
27:24Well, it gets to the room.
27:26I like the fact that you think an alpaca will list.
27:28You're like, you better not go in that room, alpaca.
27:30Stay out of the room.
27:31Stay out of the room.
27:32Natalie.
27:33All right.
27:34I went with C. Alpaca.
27:36Same thing, cuteness factor.
27:37Yeah, same exact reason.
27:38Alpaca all the way.
27:39Alpaca.
27:39Yeah.
27:40Kevin.
27:41I went with D. Sea Otter.
27:44Oh, Kevin, I could have guessed that for you, brother.
27:46That's what I...
27:47You feel sea otters.
27:48Oh, I just want to squeeze its cheeks.
27:50Yeah.
27:51I don't think they let you touch them, but I bet it'd be great.
27:53I love it.
27:54All right.
27:55Let's see.
27:56What did the average American say?
28:00Raccoon!
28:01Oh, my God.
28:01There's no way.
28:02What's a raccoon?
28:04There's a lot of raccoons.
28:05People have raccoons.
28:06Oh, I've seen it.
28:07Yeah, it's scary.
28:07Yeah.
28:08You have two questions left.
28:09I'm gonna raise the stakes a little, so this next one is worth two points.
28:13This one's a little different.
28:14You're guessing the percentage of people from zero to 100.
28:19Here we go.
28:20Next question.
28:23We asked 100 average Americans to point to Neptune in our solar system.
28:28What percentage got it right?
28:31Ten seconds.
28:32I can't do that now.
28:35Yeah.
28:44I think I know.
28:46Is it with rings?
28:48That's Saturn.
28:50That's Saturn.
28:50No, that's Saturn.
28:51Is it blue?
28:52It's the blue one.
28:54It's one farther.
28:56It's still whatever color that is.
28:57Now I'm feeling bad.
28:58It's light blue.
28:59Neptune's a little farther out than I thought.
29:01Yeah, me too.
29:01I'll be honest with you.
29:02I thought Neptune was closer.
29:03Man, where's Earth?
29:07I got that one.
29:09Natalie, what did you say?
29:10I went with 30%.
29:12Yeah, 30% of them could do it.
29:14I don't think that it's gonna be high enough to be like 50%, but I still think there are
29:18gonna be some people out there that know where it's at.
29:19Yeah.
29:19That are not us.
29:21They don't know.
29:21That are not us, yeah.
29:22Definitely some other people out there.
29:24Kevin, you're in the school system.
29:26I am.
29:27Do they know it?
29:27I was a little more confident because I work with some very wonderful students, so I
29:33said 55% because I think they may know.
29:36Let's hope they did this poll at your school.
29:40Armani?
29:41I actually went with 38%.
29:4438%?
29:45I mean, honestly, I don't think 50% of the people can pick where Neptune is.
29:49Yeah.
29:49And if they can, kudos to you because I couldn't do it.
29:51All right.
29:52Let's see what the percentage was.
29:5934%.
29:59Wow.
30:00Armani and Natalie push.
30:02The answer was 34 and y'all split right between y'all, so you both get two points.
30:06Oh, my God.
30:0738, 34%.
30:08That's good for you guys.
30:09All right.
30:1331 picked Jupiter.
30:14Seven picked Saturn.
30:15One person picked Earth.
30:18All right.
30:19One more.
30:20And it's worth a whopping three points.
30:22This is a big one.
30:24Yep.
30:24Last question.
30:27We asked 100 average Americans which of these is the most iconic Disney moment.
30:35Sharing spaghetti.
30:37The circle of life.
30:39C, carpet ride.
30:41D, glass sipper.
30:43Slipper.
30:4510 seconds.
30:47Glass.
30:47Slipper.
30:48That's how you say it.
30:51Last question.
30:58Kevin, what'd you say?
31:00So, I decided to go with B, circle of life.
31:04Mmm.
31:04I'd love it to be carpet ride because my dogs are named Aladdin and Jasmine.
31:08And it's perfect.
31:10But it can't be that.
31:11And glass slipper, it's cute.
31:13But I feel like the circle of life is current.
31:15It's now.
31:17So, I picked B, circle of life.
31:18Yeah.
31:18Good answer.
31:19We almost wouldn't put you in a bottle and sell you, buddy.
31:22You're nothing but fun.
31:24Natalie, what did you say?
31:25I disagree on the glass slipper.
31:27I went with D.
31:28I think this is iconic.
31:29As iconic.
31:29It is a little tough though.
31:30Sharing spaghetti, I will say I felt torn between that one.
31:33That's a tough one.
31:34That's also iconic.
31:35That's an old school one.
31:36Yep.
31:36Armani, I imagine you've seen every Disney movie.
31:41What did you say?
31:41So, I went B, circle of life.
31:43And I actually did this last night at a bar.
31:45Because someone had the bright idea of jumping.
31:47And I caught them and literally quite, and held them right here.
31:50Just like that.
31:50That exact moment.
31:52Yeah.
31:52I think it's the most iconic.
31:53I like that your answer's based off, truly, you're like,
31:55well, I've done that one the most recent.
31:59All right.
31:59It's all coming down to this.
32:01Armani, two points.
32:02Natalie, two points.
32:03One point.
32:04This is a big one.
32:06What did the average American say?
32:12Oh.
32:12Sharon Spaghetti.
32:13Wow.
32:14Why?
32:15Congratulations, Armani.
32:17Good job, you guys.
32:17And Natalie, you're moving on.
32:19Unfortunately, Kevin, you are the most below average American tonight.
32:24Thanks for playing.
32:25When we come back, the quest to crown the Greatest Average American continues.
32:30Our players have proven their averageness.
32:32And now it's my turn.
32:34Do not go anywhere.
32:37Give us some more.
32:38Give us some more.
32:39Yeah.
32:44Welcome back to the Greatest Average American.
32:46Armani and Natalie are one step closer to playing for the average American salary of $67,920.
32:58This next round is all about getting into the mind and body of the original Greatest Average American himself.
33:04And that is me.
33:06Let's see what I am doing tonight.
33:10Best-selling musical artist.
33:16I will have 60 seconds to name as many artists as I can who are included in the top 100
33:23best-selling artists of all time, according to the Recording Industry Association of America.
33:29I will have to give full names here, and we're talking about both bands and individual artists.
33:37And to figure out who's going to the bonus round, you two are predicting how well I'm going to do.
33:43Armani, you get to decide.
33:45Would you like to guess the number I will name or guess the over-under?
33:49Me?
33:50I think I'm going to have you guess the over-under.
33:54You're going to guess the over.
33:55You've got to do it right now, even though you don't know a number.
33:57No, I'm joking.
33:58I'm joking.
33:58I'm joking.
33:59Natalie, how many best-selling artists do you think I can name in 60 seconds?
34:04Write it down.
34:06Nate's parents did not let him listen to rock and roll, so if he knows a lot of these, he's
34:11going to get grounded.
34:14Very true.
34:15Top 100 based on album sales.
34:18How many do you think I can guess?
34:20Don't show me or say it out loud.
34:23Armani, do you think I will go over that number or under it?
34:27Write it down.
34:28Don't show anyone.
34:32It's my time to shine, Greg.
34:34Little help.
34:35Good luck, Nate.
34:36Can we put 60 seconds on the clock?
34:40On your mark.
34:42Get set.
34:44Nate!
34:45Madonna.
34:46Ariana Grande.
34:47The Beatles.
34:49Cat Stevens.
34:51That's my dad.
34:53Michael Jackson.
34:55Paul McCartney.
35:00Sabrina Carpenter.
35:01Sabrina Carpenter.
35:03Sabrina Carpenter.
35:04Sabrina Carpenter.
35:04Oh, man.
35:06I know it's crazy.
35:08It's crazy when you got a name on my...
35:10There's the number one.
35:12Rolling Stones.
35:14The...
35:1530 seconds.
35:16You have four.
35:18Nirvana.
35:20Tim McGraw.
35:22Kenny Chesney.
35:25Billy Ray Cyrus.
35:2915 seconds.
35:31You have seven.
35:32Seven.
35:32Man.
35:35Michael W. Smith.
35:39Amy Grant.
35:40Amy Grant.
35:41Sandy Patty.
35:42Three.
35:43Two.
35:45I know.
35:47I'm sorry.
35:48I'm sorry.
35:51All right.
35:51Sorry.
35:52I'm...
35:54I really...
35:54My parents didn't let me listen to a lot of stuff, so I'm not...
35:57You're grown now.
35:59What do you mean?
35:59I know, but I'm...
36:00You know, I still follow by the rules.
36:03All right.
36:03I got seven.
36:05That's pretty good for a guy not born in this country.
36:10Natalie.
36:11How many did you think I could do?
36:14I had full confidence in you.
36:15Yeah.
36:15I said 35.
36:1735?
36:2035.
36:20There it is.
36:21That's very nice.
36:22I had confidence.
36:23That's wonderful of you.
36:25Armani, if you guessed under, you win.
36:28But if it's over, then you're going home.
36:30What did you say?
36:33I'm not going home today.
36:34Under!
36:36Woo!
36:37That means Armani is moving on.
36:41Congratulations.
36:42You are the greatest average American.
36:45You deserve a little something to go to your new title.
36:47How does $10,000 sound?
36:49That is good.
36:51Woo!
36:51Woo!
36:53But can you turn it into $67,920?
36:58Let's go!
36:59Find out in the bonus round when we return to the Greatest Average American.
37:05Let's win!
37:12Welcome back.
37:13I'm here with our winner, Armani.
37:15He has earned the coveted title of the Greatest Average American.
37:19And with that comes $10,000.
37:22Woo!
37:23Woo!
37:25That's yours to keep no matter what.
37:27But you know you have a chance to increase it to the average American salary of $67,920.
37:34Yeah!
37:35And I'm going to put a little extra in there to help cover all your taxes.
37:39That's right.
37:40Let's do it, baby.
37:41Let's do it.
37:42Let's do it.
37:42What, uh, what will you do with it if you win?
37:45So, my mother is the most important person to me in this world.
37:50That's beautiful.
37:51And I'm a mechanic.
37:52I love cars.
37:53I want to buy her the first car she ever bought, which was a 1988 Nissan 200SX, build it to
37:59the
37:59way that she had it as her first car, and basically give it to her, and she could drive off
38:02into the sunset.
38:03She'd be happy and be proud of it.
38:04Oh, that's beautiful, man.
38:05That's beautiful.
38:06Well, let's hope that happens.
38:09You showed you can think like the average American, but there's one more group of average Americans
38:13you need to face, and that is our audience here.
38:19Before the show, we asked them seven questions.
38:22You will have 30 seconds to correctly predict how the majority of them answered.
38:27Get five right, and your girl home is $67,920.
38:34That's the goal.
38:35But beware, because it's three strikes and you're out.
38:39Audience, it's your answers that are helping win this money, so you should have some skin in the game.
38:44If Armani wins, you're all going home with one of my favorite things.
38:47Julian, what are they getting?
38:49Crumble cookies.
38:50Cookies from Crumble.
38:53That is one of my favorite things.
38:55I love how they spell Crumble.
38:57It's how it should be spelled.
38:58All right.
38:59Feel good?
39:00That's right.
39:01There we go.
39:01That's right.
39:02Here we go.
39:02Here we go, baby.
39:03You ready?
39:04I'm ready.
39:0530 seconds on the clock.
39:07Please.
39:09Here we go.
39:11Where would this audience rather go on vacation?
39:14Hawaii, Florida.
39:16Florida.
39:18Do they think there's life on other planets?
39:21No.
39:23When their alarm goes off, do they hit the snooze button?
39:26Yes.
39:28Which do they prefer, dogs, cats?
39:30Dogs.
39:32Do they keep their Christmas tree up past New Year's?
39:35No.
39:37Do they drive an American car?
39:38Yes.
39:40Have they ever had to run through an airport to catch a flight?
39:43Yes.
39:44We got them.
39:45All seven questions.
39:46There we go.
39:49All right, you need five of them to win.
39:51Let's take a look at your answers.
39:53Where would this audience rather go on vacation?
39:56Armani, you said Florida.
39:58Did the audience say Florida?
40:00No.
40:00Probably said Hawaii.
40:02All right.
40:03I knew it.
40:04Yeah.
40:05That's all right.
40:06Hawaii's where they want to go.
40:08Florida's reality.
40:12Do they think there's life on other planets?
40:15You said no.
40:16Audience, did you also say no?
40:20Oh.
40:21They said yes.
40:21Oh, man.
40:22That's a tough one.
40:23Wow.
40:24All right.
40:24All right.
40:25You need this one to be right.
40:27When their alarm goes off, do they hit the snooze button?
40:30You said yes.
40:31Audience, please be normal.
40:32Did you also say yes?
40:36There we go.
40:37There we go.
40:41Which do they prefer, dogs or cats?
40:44You said they prefer dogs.
40:46Audience, did you prefer dogs?
40:49There we go.
40:50We got two.
40:51We got two.
40:55You got three left.
40:56Which one of these do you feel the best about?
40:59We can open whichever.
41:00Seven.
41:00You were seven.
41:01You knew already.
41:02You need this one to be right.
41:03All right.
41:04Have they ever had to run through an airport to catch a flight?
41:08You said yes.
41:09Audience, what did you say?
41:14Yes.
41:21Final two questions.
41:22We need both these to be right.
41:24Let's go for six.
41:25You want to go for six?
41:26All right.
41:28Do they drive an American car?
41:32You need this to stay alive?
41:35You said yes.
41:37Did they say yes?
41:44Oh my gosh.
41:46I bet they keep their Christmas tree up past New Year's too.
41:49They probably do.
41:50Yeah, they do.
41:51Of course they do.
41:53Yeah.
41:53But you're still going home with $10,000.
41:55That's great.
41:58Better luck next time, audience.
42:01No crumble gift cards for any of you.
42:05Join us next time to watch another Average American Rise to Greatness.
42:11Right here on The Greatest Average American.
42:14Good night.
42:19That happens.
42:20I could have went with my gut feeling.
42:26You know, you've only read a lot about his reps.
42:32You put it on the same page and R Word.
42:33After all, you're watching intense programs to know what does.
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