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Boyzone No Matter What S01E01 (2025) [Full Movie] [Ranked]Full EP - Full
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00:01The following programme contains strong language.
00:10Hello!
00:12No, far away, far away now.
00:14Faraway trivia.
00:16Stephen Gagey once lived in a faraway trivia.
00:18Hi Melinda, hello.
00:21Are you laughing? Are you laughing at me?
00:23No, no.
00:24We were the most unlikely bunch to succeed.
00:28We weren't perfect, we weren't polished.
00:30Shane! How are you?
00:32We were a bunch of kids, put together.
00:36Pushed out on a world stage.
00:38Don't know where Mikey is.
00:39Ah, there he is.
00:41Told to look like superstars.
00:43Good luck, guys.
00:44Perhaps that was part of our charm.
01:06And the winner is...
01:08MyZone!
01:16Look at that one.
01:17Look at that one.
01:19Turn that way, look at that one.
01:29There was a massive argument in the dressing room.
01:32And I lost the plot.
01:34The band imploded.
01:35I was ready to get the fuck out of there.
01:38It was a lonely time.
01:40Standing on stage in front of 100,000 people.
01:43Fucking lonely.
01:45It was absolutely scandalous, horrendous,
01:49what the newspaper did to Stephen.
01:51The famous Louis Watson.
01:53Louis hurt me.
01:54He knew how to hurt me.
01:57Vicious, bitchy, horrible things.
02:00I think he was afraid that the monster might become bigger than the creator.
02:04As it became bigger, so did their egos.
02:07They believed their own publicity.
02:10They forgot I wrote it.
02:11Good evening, Manchester!
02:17The boy's own singer, Stephen Gately, has died.
02:21He was 33.
02:25It's very hard.
02:35We loved each other, the five of us.
02:39But you never truly allow people to see all of you and who you are.
02:43I don't think I've processed everything that's happened in my life.
02:47I don't know how much they do know about me and my struggles.
02:53After 30 years, I think now's the time to talk about it and close this chapter in our lives.
02:59This chapter.
03:26Hi, we gave hi.
03:32OK, so I want you to sort of take me back early 90s.
03:37Look, I'm back on it.
03:39And the 90s were a fucking blur.
03:43What is love?
03:45Baby, don't hurt me.
03:46Three, two, one. Go, Bobby!
03:58One is love.
04:03Another fantastic year for take-backs.
04:06They swept the smash-its home in a party board completely clean.
04:16In 1993, I was 16 years of age.
04:19I was in school.
04:21We were a working-class family in Dublin.
04:23Didn't have a lot of money.
04:25There was a story in the paper.
04:27They're holding auditions for the Irish answer to take that.
04:31This was right up my street.
04:33I love to sing, love to perform.
04:36It was happening that evening around the corner,
04:39and I remember just seeing these big lines of guys
04:42all down the stairs, outside, out onto the street, about 300 lads.
04:47I remember walking in and walking up the stairs
04:50and looking at these guys thinking,
04:52wow, they look like pop stars.
05:02Wow, they look like pop stars.
05:13They look like pop stars.
05:17I've forgotten them around,
05:20I just remember thinking, I'm never going to get in.
05:22I clearly remember that a million per cent.
05:27But I got noticed by Louis Walsh.
05:35ah i'm just waking up properly that's fine
05:43i prefer ordinary people because they work harder and they do they do whatever you wanted to start
05:50i wanted to do like an irish version of take that i was looking for boys with personality
05:57and talent and fun and irish charm i wanted that it was all about what what a girl's gonna like
06:07i had met shane before shane had a great look and even if he wasn't a great singer i was
06:15gonna work
06:16with him i would have been 17 years old i worked for my dad as a car mechanic working underneath
06:26cars fucking rain running down the back of your neck louis waltz promised us the sun moon and stars
06:34from the beginning he goes lads i'm gonna make this happen and you're gonna be big pop stars around
06:40the world and we went okay and believe them they were so keen they so wanted something different
06:47in their lives they were doing nothing and this was a chance of something great
06:52i do remember stephen gately
07:04steel steel just had this charisma that was crazy and he knew how to be a pop star he had
07:11he just
07:11had it he had that thing i was still at school doing my final exams but i i love singing
07:19i i go
07:20around all day every day singing singing singing singing i always knew that i wanted to be successful
07:26in in the entertainment business no matter what
07:34all of us had to sing and then they they stopped playing the keyboards and they wanted to see us
07:40dancing
07:45they they put on various songs and called different names and we'd have to jump up and
07:49and dance around the room so of course what did i do was pull my clothes off rightly or wrongly
07:57that's what i did and i kind of danced and and and probably gyrated i was 19 at the time
08:05dropped
08:05out of college i was living in a in an apartment it was more of a squat i'm going to
08:11be brutally honest
08:13and say i i definitely think you know i was put into the band because of how i looked at
08:17the time
08:18i don't think i was taken on because of my voice but they had to look good it wasn't just
08:24all about the
08:25vocals they had to look good you had to get girls attention
08:28shout me your sir lads ronan keith
08:31keith
08:33keith
08:34keith
08:35keith
08:36louie picked six
08:38steven
08:39shane keith
08:42myself
08:43and then two other lads uh richard and mark
08:47and that was that was boys on
08:50we were all young 16 17 18 year old boys
08:55nobody prepares a teenager for the for the world that they're about to live in nobody prepares
09:01them for the pressure cooker that they're about to kind of jump into
09:05okay well who is who now you identify yourself i'm ronan keating ronan keating where are you from
09:09i'm from swords from swords okay and who are you i'm mark walton mark walton from rohingy rohingy
09:14keith duffy rohingy rohingy rohingy shane lynch rohingy richard rock reminds stephen gaitley
09:19seventh place
09:20the next day
09:22the next day
09:23we get a call to say we're going on the late late show tonight which in ireland is the biggest
09:28it's the biggest tv show in the country i was told you don't play any instruments at all none of
09:33you
09:33i was also told that you don't sing at all none of you and louis wolf said you're going to
09:40perform
09:40on the late late show live and we said perform what we haven't learned anything we don't know
09:46each other that well you know perform what doesn't matter we'll make it up we just need to get you
09:51on
09:51tv we need to get you in the papers and we need to get you on tv so we didn't
09:54sing anything we just
09:55danced to a piece of music um and it was yeah it was pretty it was it was a moment
10:01all right okay
10:02cue the music
10:22oh god it hurts now today 30 years later it still hurts
10:32but we were loving it we didn't care we didn't give a shout we loved it
10:41i don't think there's any love hate relationship with that video
10:44whatsoever i hate it i hate it so much but how i felt at the time was great because i'm
10:53on the telly
10:54doing a little dance i'm in a band knowing the journey had begun
11:03it's just a little bit of a dance
11:03after the late late we thought we were pop stars
11:07after some photo shoots we did louis waltz wasn't happy
11:11visually wasn't happy with how we were looking
11:14and these other two guys mark walton and richard rock
11:21he just decided that they didn't fit in the group he decided that
11:25they didn't gel and the two of them were out
11:28i thought holy shit like if louis could get rid of two members of the man he'd get rid of
11:32any one
11:33of us at any moment so you've got to work harder 10 times harder than anybody else to keep your
11:37position
11:41in the band
11:41i had to let them know that they could all be replaced at any time
11:46i had to make sure they were hungry and they were ambitious and they didn't take anything for granted
11:53i was like that from day one
11:57they were all insecure because they didn't know whether they were going to make it or not
12:03they just had ambition that was the one thing they all had they all had great dreams and great
12:09ambitions as did i i knew five was the perfect number if somebody leaves you still have four left
12:19so you're okay so five was the perfect number and we got michael grayman
12:26well mick joined the band he came in the other two have left and this is the guy he's number
12:32five
12:33he was very talented very openly talented he could write songs and he he could sing and he could play
12:41and he could he could do all that so he was an immediate talent yes for sure
12:46he had a really cool look you know i just thought he's cool man and mick always had a guitar
12:50on his
12:51back and a foil full of songs under his arm and that was kind of his thing
12:58i've not spoke to mick for four years
13:04i think there's an element of industry that that damaged him
13:10and if i'm being honest i think mike mikey was a little bit lost in a boy band
13:16mikey himself is quite the recluse okay that's it cool one take two
13:31i just want to give my own honest account of my experience in the band and that is
13:43very very different from the other guys
13:55in the very early days everything was brand new to us and we had our whole future ahead of us
14:03and nobody had yet been tainted by any of the negative aspects of fame
14:16we spent 1994 traveling around ireland in a white transit van top to bottom north south east west
14:24we traveled everywhere
14:28we had some crack we had some crack in the back of that transit van it was a perfect fit
14:33it just
14:33felt like i had a family around me the boys were family it was great
14:50we were traveling around ireland and playing venues that weren't venues you know tables that were taped
14:55together in a nightclub we mimed two backing tracks we only had two live microphones and what we would
15:07do is we had three dummy microphones we choreographed movements so that we could turn and our backs would
15:13be to the audience and we could swap mics so that everybody got a chance to talk live between songs
15:18and
15:18do their link the girls all loved us the girls rushed up to the front but guys hated us they'd
15:28throw ice cubes
15:29at us and throw coins at us and they'd um they'd boo us there was loads of points where i
15:35thought oh i'm
15:35wasting my time this is not going to make any money are not going to be successful for anybody and
15:42i had a
15:42lot of sleepless nights but i knew they had something and i thought let's make the record to get them
15:51noticed get them attention and we borrowed the money it was 10 000 quid and we recorded the song
16:00i get a call from louis saying that myself stephen and ronan were being sent over to record the first
16:11boy's own song the three of us were sent over to london they obviously kind of knew from the
16:19from the auditions that do the lads had stronger singing voices than shane and i and for that reason
16:25there was no need for the additional expense of two more flights and two more hotel rooms and whatever
16:30we just felt absolutely robbed we felt that's not fair there wasn't a lot of money for flights so i
16:37just
16:37brought the best singers with me our parents paid for the flights for shane like to join the other
16:42three lads my parents certainly didn't have a lot of money so they would have had to scrimp and scrape
16:47to to get the money together for my flight but they did right lads let me explain what's going to
16:52happen
16:52all of you one at a time are going to start out listening to what's on tape and copying it
16:57i've done
16:57this for a few years i know what i'm talking about we went to meet this guy called ian levine
17:02who was the big
17:03pop producer at the time he produced bad boy zinc and early take that so this was a big deal
17:09for
17:09boys on to get in the room and we recorded um the detroit spinner song work on my way back
17:16to you
17:17one by one he put us in studio to record the lead vocal on the track and we were testing
17:26vocals and
17:27steven sang and mikey sang and then ian levine says to louis the blonde get rid of the blonde one
17:32he can't
17:33sing and i guess i didn't cut the mustard i wasn't good enough mikey and steven were immediately good
17:41enough um you know that i i found it very hard i was 16 years of age that could have
17:53broken me that was a
17:54very very tough thing to go through to be told that the get rid of the blonde when he can't
17:59sing
18:00so we recorded the song myself steven doing the lead vocals it felt good it felt positive
18:11i get into the band because i love to do music to write music so i felt that the future
18:17seems kind of
18:18brighter if it means that i can progress as a singer in this band onto bigger and better things
18:34there are a bunch of lads from north dublin who are being promoted as ireland's answer to take that
18:40would you please welcome boys on
18:48working my way back to you was only for irish release and i don't think we had an official
18:54record deal at that time i think we had a one song deal in ireland
18:57i used to love to make you cry it made me feel like a man inside we did all the
19:05work over here
19:07all the television work radio work everything everything non-stop
19:11working my way back to you went to number three i believe in the charts in ireland so we got
19:24quite
19:24successful in ireland with a number three hit that signal to the uk that ireland had a band that were
19:32worth checking out polydore records they came over to ireland and they offered us a global deal
19:42so this was our big break this is our really big break it was a big moment for the band
19:47the record
19:48company said send your best singers let's make the best record name age and where you're from okay
19:55my name is mikey graham i had to pick who i wanted to be at the lead singers michael there
20:01was part of
20:01me that made me believe that i maybe wasn't as good as i thought i was and that maybe i
20:07didn't have a
20:08position in the band or a place in the band and i'm ronan keating from swords i'm 17. ronan he
20:16was
20:16passionate he was he was driven was he competitive yes hugely competitive he would do whatever he
20:24needed to do to win to get what he wanted i was a sprinter 10 11 12 13 14 and
20:33i won the irish title
20:35i took a bit of that with me when i went into the band i was trying to impress louis
20:40because he was the
20:41manager he had already gotten rid of two members in the band i had to impress louis so i was
20:48attentive
20:48i was professional tried to always make myself look like a pop star ronan was always trying to prove
20:55himself as a singer as an artist as an all-rounder he always wanted to be the front man in
21:02the band
21:02and good for him that's what made him into ronan he had ambition yeah i don't think people realize
21:08how much work it is it's non-stop all the time it's dead easy don't worry we have a great
21:13time look at
21:14this guy here say hello to the count this is louis walsh yes the famous louis walsh that you hear
21:20so much
21:20about i decided ronan and steven were the lead singers i knew steven and ronan had something special
21:29and i knew girls liked them and i knew they wanted it so badly i couldn't take a chance i
21:37had to make
21:37the best record with the best singers that was it there was no favoritism as such without any word to
21:46anybody ronan was taking the lead role i was upset about it at the time i tried to convey
21:58that but it fell upon dead ears listen they all wanted to be lead singer ronan and steven were and
22:05that was it end of story steven and i went in did the vocals on that first big single in
22:14the uk
22:15couldn't wait for my mom to hear it that's what i was that's what i was most excited about
22:21oh wow i've i made that you know that kind of feeling that i made that it's mad
22:53and then love me for a reason goes number two in the charts at christmas time
22:58i never had to look back after that because once that single was a hit i was seen as a
23:02singer in
23:02the band and i established myself as a singer boyzone was never going to change after that and i think
23:08we all felt that we all knew we were we had a place in the band
23:23that was the beginning of a hard struggle for me through the years
23:32my confidence that i had beforehand about music fell through the fall
23:43and it was a bit heartbreaking i'll be honest with you when you see an audience full of posters you
23:50know
23:50for steven and ronan and shane and keith and then you might see the odd one with mikey you know
23:58remember i was 21 as a kid that was tough and louie went from one day speaking with me
24:07to never speaking to me for seven years and i never knew why i had absolutely no idea why
24:15i just thought he didn't like me i probably ignored him a little bit not realizing but it's because the
24:23others were so full-on i thought he was happy being michael and being the quiet one at the back
24:30i was kind of struggling with wanting to contribute more musically so the record company sent me
24:45away on my own i was working in this other studio and really hoping that what i came up with
24:53would be
24:54considered brought my stuff back to the record company and they already had the album
25:00done in london and i wasn't on the album at all don't even think of singing it that hard that
25:08hard
25:14in that loss of ambition high spiritedness vitality when that left me a lot of things left me
25:23my interest in my own appearance
25:29and i didn't drink until i turned about 24 ish and i was introduced to jack daniel's and coca-cola
25:38and that became the thing that kind of got me through the next few years of
25:42the sadness and the disenchantment i was very frustrated angry depressed because of all of that i
25:55would withdraw from the band the truth is i don't know how bad it got because i didn't talk to
26:06him
26:06the truth is i didn't recognize any of his struggles i know mick suffered from sleep he was an
26:15insomniac um and i think part of that was pressure part of that was mental struggle part of that was
26:21you know frustration but i don't know how bad it was because we didn't talk
26:30i also had a young daughter so i had that responsibility financially to make sure that
26:36she and her mother were taken care of but to be honest if it wasn't for the responsibilities i had
26:45in life like my daughter you know i would have walked and i nearly did a couple of times
26:52till i kind of calmed down and realized the financial impact it would have on my family
26:59so i stayed around oh i think there was still a lot of issues and maybe i'm to blame for
27:12that maybe i i
27:13i should have paid more attention and maybe reached out to people that i felt were struggling but i was
27:21very hungry and i wanted to be great and i wanted to have my opportunities and it created resentment and
27:28there's a resentment all sorts of demons can appear
27:37hi welcome back the boys are here boys from dublin hi nice to see you quick name check left to
27:41right
27:41i'm shane i'm mikey keith brown and steve well welcome thank you how long have you been together
27:46for uh just over a year now yeah after love me for a reason we got a big agent got
27:52a big promoter in the
27:53uk everything changed for them the star prize yeah it's these three yeah boys own hats yeah we were
28:00on all the uk tv shows pepsi chart show top of the pups and going live boys on was on
28:06everything
28:06hi we're boys on this is our new single keeps my life
28:15our first album was number one we had made it at that point that was just wow us five lads
28:24from dublin
28:25got this far it went crazy for boys own
28:32just traveling constantly airports airplanes vehicle tv studio radio station hi i'm keith and i'm
28:41ronan and we're from boys own and you're watching johnny's hit parade hi i'm keith and i'm brown
28:46you just do it on your own it's what he grabbed thailand you're watching smile tv you're watching
28:52channel v space shower tv mtv japan pop 10 tvk shuffle you're watching street they would literally
29:01work you from early in the morning like live radio show five or six in the morning to live tv
29:06show at
29:0611 o'clock at night you're just so tired when you're finished working you can sleep we're away we're in
29:17a
29:17hotel in germany we go to the bar you know we get drunk you go to bed you wake up
29:22you've got a
29:23hangover and you do it all over again the 8 special guests in the studio are boys on
29:29louis never traveled with us you know the odd time if it was something big if you're playing wembley
29:34but on the day-to-day slogging away louis hated to travel oh i'm in dublin i hardly i didn't
29:41want to go
29:42with them oh god no i don't think they knew what i actually did i don't think they knew the
29:49work that
29:49actually i did behind the scenes at all they've no idea i think they just thought i made phone calls
29:55and it all happened but it wasn't just like that really
30:03i don't think boys don't probably realized how instrumental he was
30:08to their success there was take that who were cleaning up and then there was boy zone
30:14who needed to do something fast to get people's attention next to this massive boy band
30:21and louis knew exactly what to do and exactly how to do it and that was through the tabway press
30:28i was working as the irish mirror showbiz editor my job essentially was to go get the biggest stories
30:35about the biggest stars every day you're challenged with beating every other newspaper
30:41and there were no rules there were no rules the only rule was you had to win so for me
30:47it was made very clear um when i when i got into the mirror that the sun were beating us
30:56this is one
30:56of the first conversations i had with my boss the sun are beating us every day on boy zone i
31:02didn't
31:02give a fuck a year ago he said because they were putting out a little old tat around ireland
31:07now london are getting obsessed with them and i need you to become their best mate
31:14i remember sitting down and being told to call this guy called louis walsh
31:24so i rang him and surprisingly he didn't just slam down the phone and say put in an interview
31:29request like everybody else he said give me call back in two days and i'll have a story for you
31:35i always had a really good relationship with all the people in the press
31:39and the tablas were very important so you know i i kept them on side i gave them stories i
31:44told them
31:45things louis walsh to me is the master and in 20 years of journalism is the master puppeteer of the
31:54press i mean you can't underestimate how he rewrote the rule book about engagement with the press and
32:01why you should do that he was access all areas he and he did play games he was shrewd he
32:10knew what the
32:10press needed if there wasn't a story going around louis would get you one and it didn't matter what you
32:18wrote as long as you wrote i didn't realize how much we were in the tabloids like twice a week
32:25for
32:26five years we were written about and we were out of the country so much that you know we'd speak
32:33to
32:33our mums or dads and they say oh i just read this in the paper is it true and we're
32:37like no it's not
32:39true who said that and you'd never know who said it oh yeah i mean sometimes the boys would read
32:47stories in the papers about themselves that weren't true and if they who told them that we no i did
32:54i told them because i am promoting you i make them up sometimes but that's fine
33:03he believed any story was a good story any story he would make up stories constantly about the band
33:10about relationships with girlfriends that were non-existent like plane crashes that were not
33:18true i had them in a plane crash once in australia and i forgot to tell the families i made
33:24it up but
33:25there was no plane crash but um it got a good story did you ever feel guilty about it i
33:30never felt guilty
33:31about it no way i was promoting them i was doing my job i would do it all again yeah
33:37absolutely i'd do
33:53it to you to us all having no control people making assumptions on who you are from what they read
34:00in
34:00the papers the five of us were massively affected by that we all had our fair share of stories in
34:08the
34:08paper that affect us in different ways the one who really had it the most was stephen gately i'd say
34:18have a picture at the time stephen gately was very much a dream ticket for the tabloids
34:33because every girl in the country was mad enough with him and louis had to be a dream story and
34:40almost
34:40and conceivably fantastical showbiz home run he said okay i'm giving this only to you
34:52stephen gately and baby spice are secretly dating
35:00now at this time the spice girls are zigzagarring around the world i mean people were
35:09obsessed with them on a global level boys are brilliant and stephen gately was single all the
35:17time so you don't take a step back to wonder if it could be true or if it's being exaggerated
35:24you don't care it's a home run they said it print print print and it did it i mean it
35:30went everywhere
35:37stephen he was living the dream but he had a big secret he didn't want anyone to know about it
35:44he was so scared he was so scared that it was going to kill his career
36:10the 96 was a very very special year i was 20 years of age we're playing wembley
36:17it doesn't feel real you're still waiting for somebody to tell you you're an imposter what
36:21are you doing you shouldn't be doing this it was an absolute honor to perform for the fans
36:29there is nothing i can say to you that could describe the feeling of elation
36:41we went from strength to strength that we didn't dip we kept on building on what boys own world was
36:49it was huge you could do no wrong high chart positions sellout tours record-breaking ticket sales
36:58it was so much fun so great my nickname is homeboy because i'm always homesick
37:04i was born on saint patrick's day and i used to be a dance teacher who am i
37:08so girls who is that homesick chappy steve from boyzone is here
37:16steven he was actually from day one probably the most popular member of the band for girls he was the
37:23heartthrob not ronan steven galey was the heartthrob
37:30you know we were very close we had a great bond from from very young
37:37pretty early on uh we had fans um in in the garden of our house like you know the they'd
37:44be parked
37:45outside they'd be sleeping there and my mother be making them cups of tea he probably wouldn't
37:50come back for days and they'd be still sitting outside waiting for him you know sorry guys i'm
37:55actually walking you'll have to wait later on or something
38:01where's your camera where's your camera
38:07he was the childhood sweetheart of millions of girls they loved him
38:18that's why we had to just rush and rush because if you stay there too long you will not get
38:24out
38:24and he had to negotiate his way through that you could tell that it'd taken a bit of a toll
38:29on him
38:30and we didn't know why at that time we didn't know why i certainly didn't
38:37steven i think i think it was he was probably about to go on go on a tour and he
38:43just said there's
38:44something i need to talk to you about you know i said yeah okay you know and i said well
38:48let's go
38:50for a coffee he just said that yeah i'm gay he hadn't said anything to anyone in my family
38:57you know and you know until he told me i knew the minute i met him that he was on
39:09the bus
39:10the same bus as me and there was something about the shared experience pretty soon he gravitated towards me
39:19and started to tell me stuff and i worried for him there was a huge sense of vulnerability
39:30and i knew where he was from in dublin so i knew it could never have been easy for him
39:38behind the dublin financial center one of the capital's symbols of power progress and wealth
39:43hides sheriff street symbol of poverty dilapidation and urban decay
39:48we grew up in a place called sheriff street tough tough area grown up like i had four brothers me
39:56and the boys had one bedroom myself and stephen shared a bed he was down one end i was up
40:03to the
40:03other you know it was hard for people sheriff street was a very very rough and humble place and
40:13quite unforgiving and there would have been a dominance of criminality but to try and break
40:21out of that was going to be a big deal because just saying you were from sheriff street would have
40:28been a black mark against you going for a job going for anything i was just determined to be famous
40:34since i was around nine there's no one down my area that has made it i'm going to be the
40:41first to be
40:41well known throughout the world he knew that this was his ticket out of the life that he had
41:08i was suspicious that he was gay from day one but um i knew he didn't want anyone to know
41:15about it
41:17stephen knew that keeping stum on his real nature was part of his ticket out
41:27we knew stephen was gay stephen came to us you know early doors of the band and he said it
41:32to us
41:33we were there for him you know as big brothers and protect him and look after him
41:37he was obviously concerned about the reaction that the fans would have to
41:41him being gay. I mean, you're talking 25 years ago. It was a different world back then.
41:48The Catholic Church had held a firm grip on Irish society. Ireland was completely unwelcoming
41:56to gays. Teachers, bank officials, anybody like that who was outed, had to leave the country.
42:03They were disgraced. In 1993, homosexuality was decriminalised in Ireland. But Stephen
42:13hadn't yet learned to accept that it was okay to be gay, because nobody had. It had literally
42:19just been decriminalised. So, you know, the country was only catching up with the rest
42:27of the world. And Stephen was caught in the crossfire.
42:31Will you welcome, please, boys' own Stephen Gakelick.
42:38I think Stephen's biggest fear was rejection.
42:42So, what's all this stuff about Kerri-Ann?
42:44I don't know where it sprang from.
42:45Do you know her?
42:46Yeah, I know her well, yeah. She's a really nice girl. You know, she's done well and we've
42:50known each other over the past few years.
42:51But there's no romance there at all?
42:53No, there's no romance there.
42:54What about Mandy Smith? We had her on the show and there was some talk about that.
42:56Mandy, bless her, yeah.
42:57He was trying to straddle both worlds and keep everybody happy.
43:01Do you think there's all this pressure coming on you, because all the other lads, the four-olds,
43:04are spoken for?
43:05See, I get asked this all the time. I mean, every interview we do with every magazine,
43:10they always ask, you know, you're the only one left. What's the story?
43:12When I find the right person and when I settle down, then, you know, I'll be happy and I'll
43:17let people know, but at the moment I'm just...
43:19His struggle was eating him alive. From the moment Stephen got up in the morning, until
43:24he went to bed at night, he was overwhelmingly afraid that he was going to be exposed.
43:33How do you cope with the success of the kind of media attention?
43:36It is quite difficult for me. I do find it hard to cope with at times and I just like
43:41to shut myself in my room. I'm sensitive and I can get very upset easily, but, you know,
43:49I have four great friends look after me.
43:53Stephen was incredibly fragile. He was a fragile person and it wouldn't take much to push him.
44:00There was many a time when he would lock himself in a hotel room and we couldn't get him out.
44:05He was always on his phone and you'd never know who he was on the phone to.
44:08He was always stressed out. He had a lot of anxiety going on in his life.
44:12It was a lonely, lonely place.
44:16He was scared of the press doing the story on. He was so scared.
44:21Louis did tell me that some of the papers were trying to out Stephen.
44:27One of our team who had a serious contact in The Sun had basically given us their daily summary of
44:38espionage.
44:40And it was that The Sun are running a front page world exclusive tomorrow that Stephen Gately is coming out.
44:55We're in the dressing room in the Coliseum in Hong Kong.
45:04I was a show with the editor at The Sun.
45:08Somebody came to The Sun was selling the story that Stephen was gay.
45:16I wrote the story.
45:19What we were about to do was going to change everything.
45:51I did not do the art.
45:51I had never seen him twice ago.
45:52There was Android videos that did not exist.
46:01Transcription by CastingWords
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