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00:07The producers of Roseanne, Grace, and Sybil bring three new women to one show, Townies, their lifelong friends.
00:14See? Their bathroom has no line. The women's line is insane.
00:18We don't talk in the men's room!
00:21Sorry. I'm new.
00:24Molly Ringwald in Townies, ABC Wednesdays this September.
00:28ABC brought you these great stand-up comedians.
00:31...greets Kevin Pollack, David Brenner, and Brandy, all tonight on The Late Show with David Letterman.
00:36Now stay tuned for your local news.
00:41Next on New at 11, the judge tells this gypsy fortune teller what's in her future.
00:46A mutual aid fire. There's breaking news in the Sky Center.
00:49The person at this estate is living large at your expense.
00:53It's a scam-buster expose. Next.
00:57Now, live. You're watching News Center 6.
01:07We're so proud of the Emmy Award winning Malcolm in the Middle.
01:11This November, we're running original episodes twice a week.
01:15This Wednesday, you're invited to a party.
01:17I'll take you and you.
01:19Isn't this kind of degrading?
01:21Okay, not you.
01:22Be there.
01:23For the social event of the year.
01:25No sticking gum under the table and no eating gum already stuck under the table.
01:29An all-new Malcolm in the Middle at 8, 7 Central.
01:32And catch another all-new episode next Sunday at its regular time.
01:38I made this.
01:43Tomorrow, log on to Fox.com and join a special live chat with the X-Files' newest star, Robert Patrick.
01:50Tomorrow at 2.30 p.m. Eastern, 11.30 a.m. Pacific.
01:53And next Sunday on the X-Files.
01:57It's killed four people.
01:58The corner was disemboweled by some of the shark teeth and four-toed claws.
02:02Despite son, appear to be human.
02:03But did this isn't human.
02:05Look, I am not an expert.
02:07I am just making a leap here.
02:10Bats.
02:11Do you believe it?
02:16I made this.
02:19Next week on an all-new episode of the X-Files.
02:22Looky here.
02:23The FBI.
02:25Does that look like a man who can control the weather?
02:30I would have known you was bringing the missus with you.
02:32I would have arranged for fancier accommodations.
02:36Miss, we moved your boyfriend's things into your room.
02:39What do you think of Agent Mulder?
02:41This is the guy!
02:42Not just me!
02:43I've seen how you two gaze at one another.
02:45Do not gaze at Scully.
02:47You love him, don't you?
02:48What?
02:49You're jealous because Agent Mulder and I have a special connection.
02:54America Online introduces new version 4.0.
02:57It can't get any easier.
02:58Instant messages.
02:59We've spent...
02:59From the beginning, Friends has been a show of firsts.
03:03A first impression.
03:04Everybody, this is Rachel.
03:05A first kiss.
03:07A first song.
03:11A first true love.
03:13I love her!
03:14I love you, Monica.
03:15A first confession.
03:17I think I'm falling in love with you.
03:19NBC Thursday.
03:20Be there for the Friends first.
03:22I want a baby.
03:22That will change everything.
03:24It's time!
03:25A full hour of Friends.
03:26Thursday on Envy.
03:32You stinker!
03:37Wednesday on Drew!
03:38It's finally the episode where you'll find out who wins this girl's heart.
03:42An all-new Drew County show followed by Who's Learn Is It Anyway on ABC.
03:46See you Wednesday!
03:48Commuters get set to hurry up and wait tomorrow.
03:50There's a big mess in the making at Carlisle and I-40.
03:53We'll help you avoid it.
03:54And in Consumer Alerts, can you afford a house?
04:35The world on a red dawn.
04:37And yet, after a little work on my nose due to a deviated septum,
04:41most people can't quite place me.
04:44Fortunately, when I carry the American Express card,
04:47I'm recognized wherever I go.
04:49Oh, wow.
04:51You're Jennifer Grey.
04:53The American Express card.
04:54Express card.
04:55Don't change your face without it.
04:58The American Express card.
05:04The American Express card.
05:06The American Express card.
05:34The American Express card.
05:39Norm, he's moving. I think he's okay. He's moving.
05:43Oh, no, no. The 911 people said that even if he's moving, keep doing it.
05:48Oh, okay. Here.
05:54Come on. What are you doing with that camera?
05:56What?
05:57What the hell is so funny?
05:59That is not funny.
06:01Oh, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no.
06:08Cover the clues on an all-new CSI. CBS next.
06:12The twist of the game was amazing.
06:14I kind of had my cards lined up the way I wanted them going into the merge
06:19because I was with the two people that were about to kick off.
06:21You know, I just couldn't recover from it.
06:23I was a threat to Ethan and the rest of the group.
06:26It's tough to be sitting here.
06:27You know, I planned on winning the whole thing.
06:29I'd play the game tomorrow. I'd play it next year.
06:31I mean, it's unreal.
06:33You won't believe what happens on a new 20 Fox.
06:38For 14 hours, they chased a killer virus.
06:41Why are you doing this?
06:42Send a message.
06:43Now, the moment of truth is finally here.
06:46CT, you may have located the virus.
06:48Television's most unpredictable series.
06:50No one, and I mean no one goes in or out of that building.
06:52Do you understand me?
06:53Is about to take a turn that no one is expecting.
06:56This gets out. You die.
06:58The wait is over.
06:59The terror is out.
07:01Where's the virus?
07:02You too late.
07:04An all-new 24 coming up next on Fox.
07:09America's Most Wanted starts right now on Fox.
07:14I'm John Walsh, and tonight on America's Most Wanted.
07:18Don't touch that dial.
07:20An inmate escapes, but he doesn't go alone.
07:22He takes the warden's wife.
07:24For more than 10 years, worries matter.
07:27Would we ever find them?
07:28Was she living in danger?
07:29Well, tonight, a tipster has given us all the answers,
07:32and you won't believe the story we've discovered.
07:35We'll have that story for you,
07:36and we're also chasing down a whole lot of bad guys tonight.
07:40So get ready, because the man hunt starts right now.
07:44Tomorrow, Tom Petty joins the band on an all-new King of the Hill.
07:49Oh, God.
07:50Then, after an all-new Malcolm,
07:52a restraining order forces Bart to leave the house forever.
07:55Well, I bet they miss me.
07:58The Simpsons,
07:59and Michael Bluth's fugitive father is discovered.
08:02You're coming with me.
08:03No, I can't.
08:04There are people who depend on me.
08:07An all-new Arrested Development,
08:09followed by a special encore of 24.
08:10It all starts at 7, 6 central, tomorrow on Fox.
08:19Later, on The Tonight Show,
08:21Jay's Enchanted by King Arthur's queen,
08:24Keira Knightley.
08:25From MSNBC, The Abrams Report, Dan Abrams.
08:28And tunes from Avril Lavigne.
08:30Your local news is next.
08:32Firefighters in a losing battle against a house fire
08:35blame lightning for this one.
08:38Well, today it was all about the...
08:45Tomorrow, is your local pharmacy
08:47making money off your personal information?
08:49What some chains are doing to get you to try new drugs.
08:53Watch World News Tonight.
08:55Wednesday, it's a night of firsts.
08:57On my wife and kids, Junior gets his first car.
08:59I got my life.
09:00Oh, God, please help us.
09:03And on the season finale of According to Jim,
09:05Cheryl will do anything to find out the plans
09:07for her first surprise party.
09:09Help me!
09:09I don't know anything!
09:11All right!
09:12And for the first time on network TV...
09:14I haven't been this close to an eagle
09:15since I slept with Joe Walsh.
09:17Only the cast of Drew could do a show with no script.
09:20It's a brand-new night of my wife and kids,
09:22According to Jim and Drew.
09:23ABC Wednesday, starting at 8, 7 central.
09:26You saw her in the NBC thriller
09:28The Babysitter's Seduction.
09:29And this Saturday, Carrie Russell stars
09:31in Aaron Spelling's hot new series,
09:33Malibu Shores.
09:34Chloe and Zach definitely come from
09:36completely opposite worlds.
09:38Where are you from?
09:39Malibu.
09:39And you?
09:40The Valley.
09:40Maybe I'll see you around.
09:42I'll just go up if I get your number.
09:43Forget it.
09:44She's out of her lead.
09:45That's him.
09:46But he's a Val.
09:47He's a gangbanger, Val.
09:48Their friends are fighting them
09:50every step of the way.
09:51Don't you get it?
09:52Chloe just felt sorry for you.
09:54They were kind of a gangbang.
09:55You better slow down,
09:57because this guy,
09:57he's strictly bad news.
09:59We're so completely different
10:00than what our friends
10:01and their friends
10:02and his friends
10:02think we really are.
10:04Come on, Chloe.
10:04Get a life, Teddy.
10:05Follow us.
10:06Is this what love does to people?
10:08That's a world of habit.
10:10You are these soulmates
10:11finding each other.
10:12I've never felt this way
10:13about anybody.
10:14But you have to let me in.
10:15From Aaron Spelling.
10:16All my life,
10:17I've been in a long place
10:18at the wrong time.
10:19Producer of 90210.
10:20I didn't know that
10:21I could feel like this.
10:28In a world gone mad,
10:30Danger has a new address.
10:32I hear it's hot
10:33this time of year in hell.
10:35Is today the day
10:36you really want to find out?
10:38Lights out, Frenchy.
10:421600 Danger Avenue.
10:44It's going to be
10:45the hottest summer yet.
10:46This film is not yet rated.
10:55Once due day,
10:56The Lighting of America's Tree
10:57with Mark Anthony,
10:58Natalie Cole,
10:59and 98 Degrees.
11:00Christmas in Rockefeller Center.
11:02Then, two great dramas.
11:03First, all-new West Wing.
11:05There was an explosion
11:05in a missile silo.
11:07A president's greatest fear.
11:08That must remain
11:09on the Russian control.
11:10How do you not ask us for help?
11:12Then, ripped from the headlines,
11:13the son of a famous
11:14political family
11:15accused of a 20-year-old murder.
11:17You pay off
11:18every girl he attacks?
11:19All-new Law & Order
11:20after Christmas
11:21in Rockefeller Center
11:22and West Wing,
11:22NBC Wednesday.
11:25We're...
11:25...in courses
11:26for summer become
11:27miniseries event
11:28in Tuxity.
11:29Tomorrow at 8, 7 Central.
11:30Parental discretion advised.
11:32It's time to fight back.
11:38Imagine something in your past
11:40when your world was invaded
11:42and innocence shattered.
11:44Now, the terror
11:45has found you again
11:46and you will turn
11:48and fight it.
11:49In course,
11:50this bestseller
11:50becomes a miniseries event
11:52in Tuxity.
11:53Tomorrow at 8, 7 Central.
11:54Parental discretion advised.
11:55It's time to fight back.
12:00It's all here.
12:04CBS Monday.
12:06On an all-new CSI Miami.
12:09A sniper on the loose.
12:11A sniper on the loose.
12:14A city terrified.
12:16Now to catch the shooter.
12:17CSI will go inside
12:18the mind of a killer.
12:20And that's when we'll get him.
12:21The sniper has struck.
12:23He's good.
12:23Tell us where he's been.
12:24Or where he is right now.
12:25Don't miss an all-new episode
12:27of TV's most-watched new show.
12:29This guy's on a spree.
12:30All-new CSI Miami.
12:32CBS Monday.
12:34Monday.
12:34Dave's all-new
12:35with the King of Queens,
12:36Kevin James.
12:37Plus,
12:37big visits go here.
12:41An NBC motion picture event.
12:43You can't stop this sound.
12:45Are you crazy?
12:45It was the beginning
12:46of rock and roll.
12:47The start of a revolution.
12:48There are 20,000 people.
12:50Pick your records
12:51and go home.
12:52Just say we'll see you.
12:54This is the story
12:55of the legends
12:56who broke the rules.
12:57This is nuts.
12:58NBC presents
12:59Leon, Paula Abdul,
13:01and Judd Nelson.
13:01You are looking
13:03at the future.
13:03It's ring music
13:04from Jerry Lee Lewis,
13:05Jackie Wilson,
13:06and Bo Diddley.
13:07Oh, me Bo.
13:07Mr. Rock and Roll.
13:08NBC Sunday.
13:10Say reading
13:10increases your word power.
13:12Well, check out
13:13these paradigms
13:14of vocabularic excellence.
13:15Sookie, sookie, now.
13:16Bah, bah, bah.
13:18I, I, I, I, I.
13:19Guy talk.
13:20Fascinating.
13:21Eh, eh.
13:22Big diggit.
13:23La, la, la, boo, boo.
13:24Ram.
13:24Yippee-ki-yay.
13:25Duh.
13:26Ay, caramba.
13:26Whoa.
13:27Oh, bam.
13:28Sum, sum, sum, sum, sum.
13:29Ba, ba, bam.
13:30Yasu, say, ba, boo, boo.
13:32Shush.
13:33Need I say more?
13:35TNBC reads next weekend
13:36we'll provide the dictionary.
13:38Let go, folks.
13:40In the annals of late night,
13:41in the annals
13:42of late night television,
13:43where people are judged
13:44by their character,
13:46one woman stands alone
13:50until she falls.
13:52Saturday Night Live's
13:53Molly Chen
13:55is married.
13:57Mary Catherine Gallagher?
13:58Check out her new movie.
13:59Superstar.
14:00Superstar.
14:01Superstar.
14:03Now playing in theaters everywhere.
14:05And you can see more of Mary
14:06on an all-new Saturday Night Live
14:08with host Heather Graham
14:09tonight on NBC.
14:14You stinker.
14:19Tuesday.
14:20You see who this is?
14:21It's personal.
14:22I don't owe you an explanation.
14:23It's public.
14:24What the hell's wrong with you?
14:25And it's leading this car
14:26We got all day.
14:27To a meltdown.
14:29You're heading for trouble.
14:30All new NYPD Blue
14:31ABC Tuesday.
14:32Viewer discretion advised.
14:34A NASCAR star dies
14:36after a crash
14:36in the last lap
14:37of the Daytona 500
14:39and stricter state laws
14:40for kids learning to drive
14:41and saving lives.
14:42The news in 60 seconds.
14:47Later on the Tonight Show
14:48Jay's ready to come out
14:49swinging for Jerry Springer.
14:51All furniture's been nailed down.
14:53Plus the wit and wisdom
14:54of D.L. Hughley
14:55and rockin' tunes
14:56from those tasty cranberries.
14:58Your local news is next.
15:00Two boys struck by a car
15:01tonight we stake out the streets
15:03to find out how fast
15:04drivers are really going.
15:05A fight over who twirls
15:07as the school baton
15:08turns racial.
15:09He made a scene
15:09at graduation
15:10but he went too far.
15:13And now
15:14stay tuned
15:15for the conclusion
15:16of the West Wing.
15:18And this Sunday
15:19an NBC premiere.
15:21Big City lawyer
15:22Ed Stevens
15:23is coming home.
15:24You bought
15:25the bowling alley?
15:26Yes I did.
15:28Mr. Stevens
15:29the bowling alley lawyer.
15:31I own a bowling alley.
15:32I am a lawyer.
15:32Two separate things.
15:33Critics across America
15:34are calling Ed
15:35the hottest new show
15:36of the season.
15:37Entertainment Weekly
15:38gives it an A.
15:39And TV Guide
15:40calls Ed
15:40the season's
15:41best new series.
15:42Who thinks Ed's cool?
15:44Oh come on
15:46stop already.
15:46From the producers
15:47of the David Letterman Show
15:48Ed premieres this Sunday
15:50at 8, 7 central
15:51on NBC.
15:53And next.
16:00Later on the Tonight Show
16:01Jay debates
16:02Norm's Norm
16:03Norm McDonald
16:05plus gold medal wrestler
16:06Rulon Gardner
16:07and the tunes
16:09of Spinal Tap.
16:10Welcome to this show.
16:11Think our Southland
16:13drizzles bad?
16:13Don't tell that
16:14to the people sleeping
16:15in their cars in Miami.
16:16Water everywhere
16:17no end in sight.
16:18And you just watch
16:19the West Wing.
16:20Now find out
16:20what some real
16:21Washington insiders
16:22think about it.
16:23Coming up next
16:24Channel 4 News
16:24at 11.
16:26NBC
16:26The adventure begins.
16:28Let me
16:29Michael Richards
16:30is back
16:31in the Michael Richards
16:33Show.
16:33David Alan Greer
16:34and Delta Burke
16:35in DAG.
16:36Katie Segal
16:37in Tucker.
16:38Yasmin Leith
16:39and Victoria Principal.
16:40Titans.
16:41Oliver Platt
16:42in Deadline.
16:43Steven Weber,
16:44Chris Elliott,
16:44and Amy Peets
16:45in Cursed.
16:46From the producers
16:47of the David Letterman Show
16:48and the best new shows
16:50this fall
16:50are on NBC.
16:57Later on the tonight show,
17:00Jason's up
17:00with replacement
17:01Keanu Reeves
17:02plus Wimbledon champ
17:04Venus Williams
17:05and the tunes
17:06of Hanson.
17:07Your local news
17:07is next.
17:0865 fires
17:10in 11 separate states
17:11tonight.
17:11Firefighters losing ground
17:12against the wall of flame
17:14will have the latest.
17:15And it looked like
17:15a simple box
17:16of Kleenex
17:17but what was hidden
17:18inside left a lot
17:19of people surprised
17:20and exposed.
17:21The news,
17:22Channel 4 next.
17:25Now an NBC
17:26classic moment
17:27as Bette Midler
17:28gives Johnny Carson
17:29a send-off
17:30to remember.
17:33How I miss
17:34the social intercourse
17:37so very
17:38Now I have to have it
17:41with the guy
17:42I marry
17:45Still know
17:47I'd rather
17:49watch
17:50you're
17:50From Johnny
17:52to Jerry
17:53Bette Midler
17:54guest stars
17:54on an all-new
17:55Seinfeld
17:56next Thursday.
17:58Later on the tonight show,
17:59Kathy Allen joins
18:00J with Bill Maher
18:01and P.J. Harvey.
18:02Your local news
18:03is next.
18:05Coming up tonight
18:06beyond the headlines
18:07ever dreamed
18:07of taking a magic
18:08carpet ride?
18:09He's got a deal
18:09for you.
18:10Takes you on a
18:11high-tech trip.
18:12And hundreds of kids
18:12try some
18:13crop fishing
18:14in a local time.
18:15The news is next.
18:23I got an idea
18:25for a TV show.
18:27I knew this
18:28was going to happen.
18:29I didn't.
18:30NABC original
18:31and the beat
18:32goes on
18:32Monday,
18:339, 8 central.
18:34Tuesday,
18:35Christopher Lloyd
18:36is back.
18:36I have some good news.
18:37But where's he been?
18:38I'm
18:39the Messiah.
18:41Well,
18:41that is good news.
18:43What a fiery hell!
18:45Oh, it was nice
18:46working with you.
18:47And James finally
18:49puts the moves
18:49on Priscilla Presley.
18:51Spin City and Sports Night
18:52all new 9, 8 central.
18:53See you Tuesday.
18:54Wednesday on Drew!
18:56It's round three!
18:57And it's a real
18:58slugfest!
18:59That's three best friends
18:59going on with the love
19:00of one woman!
19:01Who, when it looks like
19:02they're fighting dirty!
19:03If I was going to
19:04stoop this small,
19:05I would have shown you
19:05my naked picture of Drew.
19:06This is the episode
19:08where you'll find out
19:08who gets the girl!
19:10All new Drew Carey show
19:11followed by
19:11Whose Line Is It Anyway
19:12on ABC!
19:13See you Wednesday!
19:14This evening's show
19:15of the week
19:16is ABC's original
19:17motion picture event.
19:19Tell me, citizen buyer.
19:20Just better be careful
19:21you don't get caught.
19:22More gut-level tension
19:24than the original.
19:25I think he killed her last night.
19:27A personal triumph
19:28from Christopher Reeve.
19:30I want to make you
19:31favor.
19:31Are you done?
19:32Daryl Hannah.
19:33What now?
19:33Why don't we turn
19:34up the heat?
19:36Don't look away
19:37from this thriller.
19:40Rear Window,
19:42ABC Sunday.
19:44This week on
19:45an all-new Tonight Show,
19:46Jay welcomes
19:47Ewan McGregor,
19:48Keanu Reeves,
19:49Lawrence Fishburne,
19:50and Dennis Miller.
19:51Plus, the music
19:52of India Ari.
19:53Your local news
19:54is next.
19:56Coming up,
19:56hundreds of ruggers
19:57to send out
19:58Montana's muddiest game.
19:59And how much more
20:00mud will this rain bring
20:01will have your forecast.
20:02Plus, setting a 75-year-old
20:04music maker up
20:05to sing again.
20:06All that and more
20:07of your news at 10
20:08starts now.
20:08on the channel.
20:10You
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