00:01Do you want a dishwasher?
00:02Dishwasher.
00:03There's a good reason Michael Henry needed to go back to work.
00:06You know what I'll do?
00:07I'll call my wife on her cell phone and she'll straighten this whole thing out.
00:09911, what's your message?
00:11No, 911? No, I didn't call 911.
00:12You know what I did? I called 911, but I missed out.
00:15My drugs haven't kicked in.
00:16No, I'm fine. I'm fine. Hello?
00:19Staying at home was just too dangerous.
00:22Black NYPD!
00:25I'm fine. I said I was fine on the phone.
00:27Doesn't matter. We have to respond.
00:29Since we're both here, can I get you to sign an autograph?
00:32My uncle's got Alzheimer's.
00:33I've actually got Parkinson's.
00:35Either way.
00:38For 20 years, he's poured everything he had into work.
00:41Now, he pours it all into us.
00:44Wake up, wake up, wake up, wake up, wake up!
00:46Yay!
00:47Come on, people, who's soon as it to set the table?
00:49Are you wearing that? What, are we driving a Zamboni to school?
00:51In the Grapes of Wrath, Ma and Pa Joe escaped the Dust Bowl.
00:54My dad's condition is the Dust Bowl of my family.
00:58I'm failing you.
00:58What?
00:59The whole thing was manipulative.
01:00You can be my hero, daddy!
01:03Hi.
01:03I beg to differ.
01:04He's from Pennsylvania.
01:06He's not as funny as he thinks he is.
01:08He wears hats like they just fell off his shelf in a store.
01:10In whatever way it landed on his head, he just keeps it like that.
01:13Just gonna let it sit, like...
01:15What? It's a hat!
01:17Enough with the kale. We get it. You're white.
01:19You put those things away, you're scaring the kids.
01:21What's up, Ant-Lay?
01:23Oh, my God.
01:23You catch more flies with honey.
01:25You gotta give the flies diabetes.
01:26Yo, 5 o'clock news, we love you, bro!
01:29Thanks, man.
01:30Thanks for that.
01:31There's no one who doesn't love you.
01:33Harris!
01:34He's not the only one who misses you, Mike.
01:35You should come back to work.
01:36Are you forgetting why I left?
01:38Remember the rolling chair thing?
01:39Do you spend your time worrying about the worst-case scenario,
01:41and it actually happens?
01:43You've lived it twice.
01:44And with that, I leave you the same way I have every night for the last 11 years.
01:48Stand for them, New York.
01:50Nightly news is next.
01:51Come on, just think about it.
01:53I got an announcement I want to make.
01:55I don't want you to get angry or confused or scared,
01:58but, uh, I'm thinking about going back to work.
02:01Thank you.
02:02Jeez, I was thinking about it. Good to know where I stand.
02:05We're just kind of happy that you're getting out of the house.
02:07Kind of?
02:08Welcome back, Mr. Henry. I'm Kay, your new segment producer.
02:11If you don't like it, I can drop it like a stone.
02:13No, I like that you're shorter than me. It's a nice touch.
02:15Look at you. You're back already.
02:20What are you doing?
02:21Rocky, how old are you?
02:27Car sick, huh?
02:28I'm fine.
02:29For me, it's perfectly still.
02:33We both know NBC's going to milk it by showing me in slow motion
02:36with lame uplifting music in the background.
02:41America's favorite newsman is back.
02:44Oh, for the love of...
02:45Mike Henry returns to NBC4.
02:49He's ready.
02:49Are you?
02:50When you're in slow motion, you're either dead or under indictment.
02:53Or you just got kicked off of American Idol.
02:55And we're back with a very special guest this morning.
02:58Mike Henry's here.
03:00It's always good to be with old friends.
03:01It feels like you never left.
03:02You look like you're in the pinnacle of hell.
03:05I wouldn't say pinnacle.
03:13Can you not have a personal victory right now?
03:14We are starving.
03:15Wait a minute.
03:16Oh, yeah, okay.
03:16This is the Bright Side.
03:18Grazie a tutti.
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