- 2 days ago
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00:00:11I
00:00:16Well, this ain't no Whoville, but it'll do I got me enough vials to last me 12 days of Christmas
00:00:26See this it ain't no log. This is a human arm
00:00:33specifically a fat man's
00:00:35It burns nice doesn't it?
00:00:39Surprising, huh?
00:00:41I keep a few of these arms dry aging throughout the year just because it's so nice during the winter
00:00:46Stay armed stay warm. That's what I always say
00:00:54well
00:00:56I'd give you the season's greetings, but we don't have much by the way of seasons out here anymore
00:01:02And we damn sure don't have any Santa Claus
00:01:08My jaw hurts from talking so why don't y'all stare at this fire for a little while?
00:01:15Now if I fall asleep make sure you tilt my head away from it
00:01:22Yes, indeed. This is mr. New Vegas coming to you live from my namesake
00:01:28Bringing you all your holiday favorites this Christmas season
00:01:33Now I hope it's warm and cozy where you are and not because you're losing consciousness
00:01:39Unless of course that's what you want to do. We all cope
00:01:43With the horrors of life in our own chemical way
00:01:47I'm taking your dedications all night and reading your christmas greetings and heartwarming stories live on the air
00:01:58Here's one from Bob in the former arizona
00:02:02He writes my dog ran off on christmas eve and I tell you it was a repeat of the exact
00:02:09story of christmas
00:02:10Strangers came out of nowhere to help us look for him
00:02:14Just like the three kings from orientar
00:02:18I was working with them as one of the kings and then god is the king of all kings
00:02:25So we had five kings
00:02:27But there were seven people total two women and five men
00:02:32So five kings two queens plus me plus god that's nine kings total including queens
00:02:40And none of us knew where the heck this dog was so i'm thinking
00:02:45That's like the original jesus from the story the dog is the lost baby jesus
00:02:52So i'm starting to get very stressed out because not only did I lose the dog
00:02:57But the dog would tell me when somebody was coming these people appear
00:03:01They don't find him plus they keep asking me if I have kims
00:03:07And I do but i'm not sharing and i'm mad and that's making me feel guilty
00:03:14Yes, I have rage issues, but that explains why I can't part with the kims
00:03:20They're medical anyways it turns out the dog hadn't gone far
00:03:24He heard me executing some people earlier got scared and hit on the panels
00:03:30He eventually came back out when I started roasting one of the people I killed
00:03:35Now I wish I had figured that out before I executed all the other kings
00:03:40But I did my best with the information I had at the time
00:03:44Long story long
00:03:46I didn't know I needed a dog to celebrate christmas before I tried doing it without one
00:03:53Isn't that pathetic?
00:03:56I hate myself
00:03:58Thanks bob
00:04:00Now here's a holiday tune that'll soothe you faster than a blood brain barrier full of gaseous kims
00:04:16saying
00:04:21We wish you a merry Christmas
00:04:24We wish you a merry Christmas and a happy new year
00:04:33We're tiling to bring to you as you can
00:04:39We wish you a merry Christmas and a happy new year
00:04:45We all want some piggy food
00:04:48We all want some piggy food
00:04:51We all want some piggy food
00:04:54Some friends are so happy
00:04:57We're tiling to bring to you as you can
00:05:03We wish you a merry Christmas and a happy new year
00:05:10We're tiling to bring to you as you can
00:05:14Until we get, so we won't go
00:05:17Until we get, so we won't sell somebody
00:05:23My names take me, so you and your king
00:05:28We wish you a new response, a happy end
00:05:35Have, have, have, haven't we?
00:05:38Have, have, have, haven't we?
00:05:42Have, have, have, haven't we?
00:05:44Have, have, have, have, have, haven't we?
00:06:19Have, have, have, have, have, have, have, have, have, have, have, have, have, have, have, have, have, have, have, have,
00:06:25have, have, have, have, have, have, have, have, have, have, have, have, have, have, have, have, have, have, have, have,
00:06:25have, have, have, have, have, have, have, have, have, have, have, have, have, have, have, have, have, have, have, have,
00:06:25have, have, have, have, have, have, have, have, have, have, have, have, have, have, have, have, have, have, have, have,
00:06:25have, have, have, have, have, have, have, have, have, have, have, have, have, have, have, have, have, have, have, have,
00:06:25have, have, have, have, have, have, have, have, have, have, have, have
00:07:04Have yourself a holiday, a happy day, merry Christmas, oh I'm like a kid at Christmas.
00:07:25How I love the scent of pine, and snowy Christmas postcards, how they decorate my mind.
00:07:42Yes, I'm like a kid at Christmas, cause it still gives me a thrill, when I feel the spirit of
00:08:00goodwill.
00:08:06Oh I'm like a kid at Christmas, how I love the corner choirs.
00:08:18And kiss unwrapped by a loved one girl, by a blazing fire.
00:08:30Yes, I'm like a kid at Christmas, cause it still gives me a thrill, when I feel the spirit of
00:08:49goodwill.
00:08:56Have yourself a holiday, have yourself a happy day.
00:09:06Yes, I love the Christmas school of goodwill.
00:09:19Now I know that you love Christmas, oh white with falling snow.
00:09:30A tree with a bowl of trimmings, a touch of mistletoe.
00:09:43And like a kid at Christmas, how I gotta wish it's true.
00:09:55Oh, how I love to spend my Christmas with you.
00:10:09Have yourself a holiday, have yourself a happy day.
00:10:21Have yourself a holiday, have yourself a happy day.
00:10:33Have yourself a holiday, have yourself a holiday.
00:11:01Hi, I'm DJ Mr. New Vegas, and picturing you sit there, listening, lounging in your lingerie,
00:11:10sets my imagination to spinning 45 RPM.
00:11:14Here's a tune.
00:11:52Here's a tune, here's a tune.
00:11:53Here's a tune, I'll have a poetry if you want to play percent of the green color water.
00:11:54Here, where are we, going to play park for about this,sters
00:11:54the Michigan time and rolling into the green color. Here's
00:11:55a tune, let'sθ here. And I
00:12:06love your effects. There can
00:12:08be a new budgetures for you.
00:17:30Through the
00:17:35Jingle bells, jingle bells, jingle all the way
00:17:39Oh, what fun is to ride in one more soulpen sleigh
00:17:43Jingle bells, jingle bells, jingle all the way
00:17:48Oh, what fun is to ride in one more soulpen sleigh
00:17:53Dashing through the snow in one more soulpen sleigh
00:17:57O'er the fields we'd go, laughing all the way.
00:18:02Bells on bobtails ring, making spirits bright.
00:18:07What fun it is to ride and sing a sleigh of song tonight.
00:18:11Jingle bells, jingle bells, jingle all the way.
00:18:16Oh, what fun it is to ride in one horse open sleigh.
00:18:20Jingle bells, jingle bells, jingle all the way.
00:18:24Oh, what fun it is to ride in one horse open sleigh.
00:18:29A day or two ago, I thought I took a ride.
00:18:34And soon Miss Fanny Bride, seated by my side.
00:18:39The horse was lean and lank, misfortune seemed his lot.
00:18:43He got into a drifted bank and winged, we got him spot.
00:18:47Oh, jingle bells, jingle bells, jingle all the way.
00:18:52Oh, what fun it is to ride in one horse open sleigh.
00:18:57Jingle bells, jingle bells, jingle all the way.
00:19:01Oh, what fun it is to ride in one horse open sleigh.
00:19:06Oh, what fun it is to ride in one horse open sleigh.
00:19:33Oh, little town of Bethlehem.
00:19:39Oh, little town of Bethlehem.
00:19:40Oh, little town of Bethlehem.
00:19:41And now exists in one horse open sleigh.
00:19:47Oh, little town of Bethlehem.
00:19:50In theΠ΅ΡΠ΅, I will not walk in one horse open sleigh.
00:19:54In the mountains of Bethlehem.
00:20:00And on the waters of Bethlehem.
00:20:00Okay, oh, sleigh gray in one house open sleigh.
00:20:08It's always a masterful symbol when able when you're in a sleigh.
00:20:14The hopes and fears of all the years are ready to be tonight.
00:20:49The hopes and fears of all the years are ready to be tonight.
00:21:23The hopes and fears of all the years are ready to be tonight.
00:22:03The hopes and fears of all the years are ready to be tonight.
00:22:11The hopes and fears of all the years are ready to be tonight.
00:22:18The hopes and fears of all the years are ready to be tonight.
00:22:41Regardless whether you're listening to every one of these dedications, I will always love you forever.
00:22:49Nothing can change that.
00:22:55The hopes and fears of all the years are ready to be tonight.
00:23:24The hopes and fears of all the years are ready to be tonight.
00:23:57The hopes and fears of all the years are ready to be tonight.
00:24:36The hopes and fears of all the years are ready to be tonight.
00:47:11I can't confirm that,
00:47:12I can't confirm that, but I can confirm it makes people mad.
00:47:14I wish I hadn't eaten so many people so I'd have someone around to make me feel better.
00:47:20Well, Andy, you see, I can't make you feel better because what you've described is a work of an able
00:47:27person.
00:47:28But I'll let God do the judging.
00:47:30Here's an old classic.
00:47:44irgendwie...
00:48:01That's right.
00:51:02Take a Christmas ride with him, bags of toys for boys and girls, spreading joy around the world.
00:51:10Ho, ho, ho, and here we go, up in Santa's sleigh.
00:51:15Ho, ho, ho, and here we go, a merry all the way.
00:51:20High up where the reindeer flies, swoopin', swirlin', cross the sky, Santa's got his list in hand, along with his
00:51:29special Christmas plan.
00:51:51Ho, ho, ho, ho, and here we go, up in Santa's sleigh.
00:51:56Ho, ho, ho, ho, and here we go, a merry all the way.
00:52:00Ho, ho, ho, ho, and here we go, a merry all the way.
00:52:01Ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, and here we go, a merry all the way.
00:52:01Santa said to jump right in, take a Christmas ride with him.
00:52:16Ho, ho, ho, ho, and here we go, a merry all the way.
00:52:37Ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, and here we go, get ready for a ride.
00:52:56Ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho,
00:53:07ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho,
00:53:07ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho,
00:53:07ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho,
00:53:07ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho,
00:53:07ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho
00:53:13I'm young, virgin, mother and child, holy, in the soul, temper and mind, sleep in heavenly peace, sleep in heavenly
00:53:41peace.
00:53:50Silent blood, holy night, shepherds quake at the sight, glories stream from heaven afar.
00:54:13Heavenly hosts sing out of the earth, Christ the Savior is born, Christ the Savior is born.
00:54:42Silent night, holy night, Son of God, love's pure light.
00:54:58Radiant beams from thy holy face, with the dawn of redeeming grace.
00:55:13Jesus, Lord, at thy birth.
00:55:23Jesus, Lord, at thy birth.
00:55:30Jesus, Lord, at thy birth.
00:55:39Jesus, Lord, at thy birth.
00:55:44Jesus, Lord, at thy birth.
00:55:45Jesus, Lord, at thy birth.
00:55:45Jesus, Lord, at thy birth.
00:55:50Jesus, Lord, at thy birth.
00:55:54Jesus, Lord, at thy birth.
00:55:56Jesus, Lord, at thy birth.
00:55:58Jesus, Lord, at thy birth.
00:55:58Jesus, Lord, at thy birth.
00:55:59Jesus, Lord, at thy birth.
00:56:00Jesus, Lord, at thy birth.
00:56:00Jesus, Lord, at thy birth.
00:56:02Jesus, Lord, at thy birth.
00:56:03Jesus, Lord, at thy birth.
00:56:05Jesus, Lord, at thy birth.
00:56:07Jesus, Lord, at thy birth.
00:56:09Jesus, Lord, at thy birth.
00:56:14because you're surrounded by shifting sand dunes.
00:56:18I find Christmas songs are like wayfinding stars to guide my year by.
00:56:24If I hear them, I know Christmas can't be far away.
00:56:41Angels we have heard on high
00:56:44Sweetly singing all the plains
00:56:47At the mountains in reply
00:56:50Echo back fifth joyous dreams
00:56:52Glory
00:56:58In excelsis Deo
00:57:01Glory
00:57:06In excelsis Deo
00:57:21Come Bethlehem and see
00:57:24In whose birth the angels sing
00:57:26Come adore all bend at me
00:57:29Christ the Lord the new born in
00:57:32Glory
00:57:37In excelsis Deo
00:57:41Glory
00:57:46In excelsis Deo
00:57:49In excelsis Deo
00:58:06Glory
00:58:11In excelsis Deo
00:58:19Gloria
00:58:20In excelsis Deo
00:58:23In excelsis Deo
00:58:26In excelsis Deo
00:58:30Brr
00:58:49In excelsis Deo
00:58:55What's being that old Rudolph finds his way?
00:59:00Santa, I can hardly wait for Christmas Eve.
00:59:05So you better bring lots of presents in your spring, please.
00:59:11Santa Claus, I've been waiting so long for you.
00:59:16Come and visit me on Christmas Eve.
00:59:20So I hope you'll drop on by as you're right across the sky.
00:59:26Let me help pretend to be fast asleep.
00:59:31Santa Claus, don't be late on Christmas Eve.
00:59:36Hoping that old Rudolph finds his way.
00:59:41Santa, I can hardly wait for Christmas Eve.
00:59:46So you better bring lots of presents in your spring.
00:59:49Let me help you.
01:00:12Santa Claus, don't be late on Christmas Eve.
01:00:16Hoping that old Rudolph finds his way
01:00:22Santa, I can hardly wait for Christmas Eve
01:00:27So you better bring lots of presents in your sleigh
01:00:32Hope you're up on fire as you're riding from the sky
01:00:37And what you can to be, you have to sleep
01:00:57This is DJ Mr. New Vegas
01:01:00I love your style
01:01:02I'm attracted to you
01:01:03Understand?
01:01:15Oh, jingle bells, jingle bells, jingle all the way
01:01:20Oh, what fun it is to ride in a one-horse open sleigh
01:01:25Hey, jingle bells, jingle bells, jingle all the way
01:01:29Oh, what fun it is to ride in a one-horse open sleigh
01:01:34Dashing through the snow in a one-horse open sleigh
01:01:38Oh, the field we go, laughing all the way
01:01:43And some bobtail ring, making spirits bright
01:01:47What fun it is to laugh and sing a sleigh in some good night
01:01:52Oh, jingle bells, jingle bells, jingle all the way
01:01:56Oh, what fun it is to ride in a one-horse open sleigh
01:02:01Hey, jingle bells, jingle bells, jingle all the way
01:02:05Oh, what fun it is to ride in a one-horse open sleigh
01:02:11Oh, jingle bells, jingle bells, jingle all the way
01:02:21Oh, what fun it is to ride in a one-horse open sleigh
01:02:29Oh, what fun it is to ride in a one-horse open sleigh
01:02:32Oh, jingle bells, jingle all the way
01:02:38Oh, what fun it is to ride in a one-horse open sleigh
01:03:12Oh, jingle bells, jingle all the way
01:03:31Oh, what fun it is to ride in a one-horse open sleigh
01:03:36Oh, what fun it is to ride in a one-horse open sleigh
01:03:36Hey, jingle bells, jingle bells, jingle all the way
01:03:40Oh what fun it is you laddin', one huts up and slay
01:03:45Oh what fun it is you laddin'
01:03:53One huts up and slay
01:04:41Gathering with a few, well.
01:04:53Bring me flesh and bring me wine, bring me pine locks hither.
01:04:58Thou and I will see him die, when we bear them hither.
01:05:03Page and monarch, forth they went, forth they went together.
01:05:08From the ruins, wild lament, and the bitter weather.
01:05:13. . .
01:05:15. . . .
01:05:17. . .
01:05:19. . .
01:05:20. . .
01:06:56And here's a letter from a long-time listener, P, from D.E.
01:07:00He says, every year I listen to your show, thank you, Pete, and I reflect on the people I spent
01:07:08prior Christmases with, killing or eating.
01:07:11Like Jimmy Cain, who went caroling with me in order to distract our marks while we robbed them.
01:07:20He got a little handsy with his half of the take, so I had to put a bullet in his
01:07:25brain.
01:07:27Or Melissa, who used to deck the halls in a major way,
01:07:31filling our collapsed shipping container
01:07:34with all manner of radioactive glowing bugs
01:07:38in a Christmas-spirited style.
01:07:40She got bad tumors, had to put her out of her misery.
01:07:46And how could I forget Big Sarah,
01:07:49who captained the merry sleigh
01:07:52when we hitched our gear to some angry Brahmins
01:07:56and made it more than 100 miles across the wasteland together?
01:08:00She didn't say thank you enough,
01:08:03so I had to put a bullet in her brain also.
01:08:06But I think about her often because of just how long I spent
01:08:11drying and eventually devouring all of her copious leg meat.
01:08:17She had huge, great legs.
01:08:20Now, I don't mean that in a sexy way.
01:08:22Just in a hungry way.
01:08:24I found a large cyst on one of her legs
01:08:27and there was a full tooth growing in it.
01:08:30Please play Angels We Have Heard on High for me.
01:08:42Oh, Christmas tree, oh, Christmas tree,
01:08:46oh, Christmas tree, how lovely are your branches.
01:08:49Oh, Christmas tree, oh, Christmas tree,
01:08:52how lovely are your branches.
01:08:55Your boughs are green in summertime
01:08:58and through the snows of wintertime.
01:09:01Oh, Christmas tree, oh, Christmas tree,
01:09:05oh, Christmas tree, how lovely are your branches.
01:09:14Oh, Christmas tree, oh, Christmas tree,
01:09:36Oh, Christmas tree, what happiness you're bringing.
01:09:40Christmas tree, oh, Christmas tree,
01:09:43your beauty tree will teach me.
01:09:47Christmas tree, oh, Christmas tree,
01:09:50your beauty tree will teach me.
01:09:53That hope and love will ever be
01:09:56the way of joy and peace for me.
01:09:59Oh, Christmas tree, oh, Christmas tree,
01:10:02for happiness you're bringing.
01:10:05Or happiness you're bringing.
01:10:06Oh, Christmas tree, oh, Christmas tree,
01:18:09out of the, what's it called, cloud.
01:18:12I was trying to remember what sledding it was like,
01:18:16but for some reason all I can think of when I think of sleds
01:18:20is just skin slothing off charred corpses and broken bones.
01:18:25Like last year I thought I saw snow,
01:18:27but it was actually a whole ton of termites
01:18:31all flying out of some barn.
01:18:33Whatever was in that barn must have been even worse
01:18:37than a plague of termites.
01:18:40I find myself thinking this way now.
01:18:44We all dare, Ted.
01:18:45Merry Christmas.
01:18:47Suck down some chems and see if you can't forget
01:18:50all about your circumstances.
01:19:01Let's share a special gift this Christmas.
01:19:08Love that we'll share from this day on.
01:19:15Then seal our gift of love with kisses
01:19:20While being wrapped up in each other's arms
01:19:29Let's exchange kisses this Christmas
01:19:35Your kiss will be a gift to top them all
01:19:41A rose exchange kisses this Christmas
01:19:49Our love will keep us warm till Santa Claus
01:19:58This is the friendliest of seasons
01:20:03This is the friendliest of seasons
01:20:05For one and all of festive times
01:20:12Love's all around and that's the reason
01:20:18To celebrate just place your lips on mine
01:20:24To celebrate just place your lips on mine
01:20:26Let's exchange kisses this Christmas
01:20:32Your kiss will be a gift to top them all
01:20:41Let's exchange kisses this Christmas
01:20:46Our love will keep us warm till Santa Claus
01:20:54We just might wait
01:20:58We just might wait
01:20:58We just might wait
01:20:59Need the mistletoe
01:21:01To be face to face
01:21:04For the best thrill we know
01:21:08Let's exchange kisses this Christmas
01:21:15Your kiss will be a gift to top them all
01:21:23Let's exchange kisses this Christmas
01:21:29Our love will keep us warm till Santa Claus
01:21:37This love we feel today would never go away
01:21:44If we share Christmas kisses every day
01:21:49If we share Christmas kisses every day
01:22:25We just don't buy Christmas
01:22:26We just need something to 13
01:22:26We can gute everyone
01:22:26Webread Ballot
01:22:26We wish to be filled and ready
01:22:26We wish to love thenorok
01:22:33Let's exchange kisses Check kisses
01:22:41ihnenus
01:22:42Pony
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