00:01Did you guys ever think that I'd be doing something more with my life?
00:04Every day you walk into work, you're curing disease.
00:13I'm not curing disease.
00:17What about your video game? You're the best at it, right?
00:21Welcome to the resistance.
00:22Go, go, go.
00:24Congratulations. You are the savior.
00:32We've come back from the year 2162.
00:34Everything that happens in the Biotic Wars is real.
00:37The game is a recruitment and training tool sent back in time to find the one person with the skills
00:41to save us.
00:42The first and only person to have beaten the game.
00:45That's the last Starfighter. It's the exact same plot as the movie.
00:49What's a movie?
00:50Is this part of your arsenal of weaponry?
00:51No, no, please don't. That's a signed...
00:53Oh my God! I paid my only Bitcoin for that!
00:57You're the key to stopping Elias Cronish.
00:59That man's research leads to the annihilation of the entire human race.
01:02No, he's working on a cure for herpes.
01:04It's what we're fighting here.
01:05A good fight.
01:05You're telling me that a cure for herpes is what brings down all of mankind?
01:10Holy shit.
01:11Welcome to the resistance.
01:13Okay.
01:15Oh!
01:17We have to go back in time.
01:19We killed baby Cronish.
01:21Absolutely not. You cannot kill a baby.
01:23They're invincible.
01:24No. They are helpless and they're very soft.
01:26Perfect. Easy kill.
01:28If we can stop him from getting herpes, he never creates the cure.
01:31And we can stop this whole cycle before it even begins.
01:35We cockblock him.
01:36Here's a little something I brought with me from the future.
01:41Yo, Tita!
01:42You know that new dance movie little brother Michael was looking for?
01:45Well, wait till you see this!
01:48You need to blend in.
01:49It's Time Travel 101.
01:50Hands on table!
01:52We are from your time!
01:54I love the 80s!
02:00You're telling me you've been back and forth through time
02:05just to avoid killing me?
02:07Yeah.
02:08I thought that Time Travel was going to be fun.
02:11This whole mission is insane.
02:12What did you think?
02:13This was a game?
02:14Yeah!
02:15Because I bought it at a game store with my birthday money!
02:20No!
02:24No!
02:25No!
02:26No!
02:26No!
02:27Shut your men!
02:29No, I think I just got this.
02:33Yeah!
02:58Grazie a tutti.
Commenti