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00:00I was born a liar, at least. That's the label mom slapped on me.
00:05As a diehard believer in data-driven parenting, she strapped truth bands on my twin sister Mia and me the
00:13day we were born.
00:14If we lied, the band flashed red, and mom would hit a remote to shock us.
00:20Mia's band was always green.
00:22She could shred mom's favorite dress to pieces, blame the cat, and her band would just glow a soft, gentle
00:33green.
00:34But for me, even if I just whispered,
00:38Mom, I'm hungry.
00:40My band would instantly explode into an angry red, followed by a piercing electric shock.
00:48I'm not a machine, mom.
00:50I used to try to defend myself, but she'd always say,
00:55Machines don't lie. Pain is how you learn. I'm doing this for your own good.
01:00After thousands of shocks, I honestly started to believe I was just completely broken.
01:07New Year's Eve, everything changed.
01:10New Year's Eve, everything changed.
01:13On New Year's Eve, mom was getting ready to take Mia to see the fireworks.
01:18A sudden, tearing agony hit my stomach.
01:23I curled up on the floor, begging,
01:26Mom, my stomach hurts so much.
01:28Please help me.
01:30But my band just frantically flashed red.
01:34She glared down at me, shivering in a cold sweat, cranked the shock dial to the absolute max, and spat.
01:41You're pretending to be sick just so you can come watch the fireworks with us?
01:45You never change!
01:46She turned, grabbed Mia, and slammed the door behind them.
01:51I couldn't help but think she was right.
01:54The band was red, so I must not actually be in pain.
01:58I was just making it up for attention again.
02:01I'm sorry, mom.
02:03Next time around, I promise I'll be an honest kid.
02:06It hurts so much!
02:08I writhed in agony, my fingernails scratching pale marks into the floorboards.
02:19The doorknob turned.
02:22A glimmer of hope sparked in my eyes.
02:26Mom was bad.
02:28She was a doctor.
02:29She must have realized something was horribly wrong and came back to save me.
02:34Are you done yet?
02:35The fireworks are about to start.
02:37Mia's getting impatient.
02:38Mom.
02:39I called out weakly, reaching a trembling hand toward the door.
02:44It really hurts.
02:45It feels like my intestines are tearing apart.
02:49She just glanced at the frantic red light flashing on my wrists.
02:53Squatting down, she pinched my chin, her voice dripping with venom.
02:57Lily, how long are you going to keep up this act?
03:01You're a pathological liar.
03:03You can stay home and think about what you've done.
03:05Honey, hurry up.
03:06The fireworks are about to start.
03:09If Singha doesn't want to go, fine.
03:11Should we leave her some food?
03:13Mom stood up and dusted off her hands, like touching me had made her filthy.
03:18Leave her food for what?
03:20She has plenty of snacks in her room.
03:22She bought them with money she stole last time.
03:24She won't starve.
03:25Lock the door.
03:26Don't let her out until that bracelet turns green.
03:29But...
03:30But what?
03:31Spare the rob?
03:32Spoil the child?
03:33Look at Mia.
03:34She's perfectly honest.
03:36Her band is always green.
03:37Lily is rotten to the core.
03:39We have to correct her.
03:41But my closet was completely empty.
03:43Mia was the one who stole the cash, and she ate all the snacks.
03:49Mia had just stood there, her band glowing that soft green, and said,
03:56It wasn't me.
03:57And Mom believed her.
04:00When I tried to defend myself and said I didn't take it either, the red light flashed, and I got
04:07shocked.
04:07I watched Mom turn around to leave.
04:13Mia peeked through the crack in the door and stuck her tongue out at me.
04:18Bye, sis.
04:19We're going to see the pretty fireworks.
04:21Her band was glowing a vibrant green.
04:24It really was beautiful.
04:25The door slammed shut, followed by the heavy click of the deadbolt.
04:30The house went dead silent, leaving just me alone with the saw tearing through my stomach.
04:38It hurts so much.
04:41Mom was right.
04:42Machines don't lie.
04:44The band is red, so I must be making this up.
04:48I'm not in pain.
04:50I'm really not in pain.
04:52Tears streaming down my face.
04:54I tried to brainwash myself.
04:58I don't know how much time passed, but it actually started to hurt less.
05:04Using my last breath, I dragged myself to the desk.
05:09I had to write my punishment lines.
05:13Those were the rules.
05:14Whenever the red light flashed, I had to write,
05:19I am a liar a thousand times.
05:22Once I finished, Mom would forgive me, right?
05:25She'd take me to the hospital then.
05:28With trembling hands, I flipped open my crumpled diary.
05:33The pages were crammed with all my previous apologies.
05:38I used to always write,
05:41I'm sorry, I was wrong.
05:44I won't lie again.
05:46But this time,
05:48I wanted to write the truth.
05:50My vision blurred.
05:53Crying,
05:54I used every last ounce of my strength to write,
05:59Mom,
05:59I really do love you.
06:02It hurts so much.
06:04Why won't you just believe me?
06:06Mom, please,
06:08just believe me this one time.
06:10The moment I finished the last word,
06:13the excruciating pain in my stomach completely vanished.
06:17My body felt light,
06:18and I began to float.
06:20I looked down and saw myself slumped over the desk,
06:25arm dangling in the air,
06:27completely motionless.
06:28The band on my wrist was still frantically flashing red,
06:33so I was dead.
06:35But I still hadn't learned how to be an honest kid.
06:40I'm sorry, Mom.
06:42I was awakened by a burst of laughter.
06:45It was my dad,
06:46my mom,
06:46and my sister.
06:47The fireworks were so beautiful tonight,
06:50especially the smiley face one.
06:52It was as cute as our Mia.
06:54There was a tenderness in Mom's voice
06:57that I had never heard before.
07:00I floated in midair,
07:01watching the front door open.
07:03Now a soul,
07:04I instinctively drifted toward them,
07:06wanting to bring them their slippers like I used to.
07:10It was a people-pleasing instinct carved into my bones.
07:13Mom.
07:14I opened my arms,
07:15wanting to hug the woman still carrying the chill of the night.
07:19I don't hurt anymore.
07:21I'll be good from now on.
07:23Please don't be mad.
07:25But my hands passed straight through her body,
07:27like trying to catch the wind.
07:29Mom shivered and frowned.
07:31Why is it so cold in here?
07:32Is the heat off?
07:34I froze,
07:35staring at my transparent palm.
07:37That's right.
07:38I was already dead.
07:40The dead can't hug the living.
07:42Go check on Lily.
07:44That girl hasn't come out to eat either.
07:45Don't let her really starve.
07:46Dad mentioned it casually.
07:48Dad was still the better one.
07:49I looked at Mom expectantly.
07:52If she found out I was dead,
07:54would she be sad?
07:55Would she regret it?
07:57Mom snorted and slipped into her house shoes,
08:00walking toward my room.
08:01She'd deserve it if she starved.
08:03Faking illness for attention is a bad habit
08:05that comes from being spoiled.
08:07She pushed my door open.
08:10She pushed my door open.
08:12She didn't turn on the light.
08:14By the light from the living room,
08:16she saw me slumped over the desk,
08:19motionless,
08:20as if asleep.
08:21Oh?
08:22Still lying there?
08:24You think lying on the desk,
08:25pretending to be pitiful,
08:26will make me carry you to bed?
08:28Lily, you're ten years old,
08:30not five.
08:31Mom!
08:32I'm not pretending to sleep.
08:34I'm dead.
08:36Look at me.
08:37Touch me.
08:38My body is cold.
08:39But Mom couldn't hear me.
08:41She only believed what she chose to see.
08:44My sister slipped in under her arm
08:47and raised her wrist proudly.
08:49Big Sat is a lazy pig.
08:52Look, my bracelet is green.
08:53Hers is still red.
08:55She's always lying.
08:57She even lies in her dreams.
09:00Mom patted her head.
09:01Dad peeked in from behind.
09:02Maybe carry her to bed?
09:03It's freezing.
09:04Carry her?
09:05For what?
09:06Kids these days are spoiled.
09:08This bracelet manufacturer say
09:09this is when you apply cold treatment.
09:11She has to realize her own mistakes.
09:13Look at that red light.
09:14It shows she's still in a state
09:15of extreme resistance.
09:17She hasn't reflected at all.
09:18That's enough.
09:19Go to bed.
09:19We're visiting Grandma tomorrow.
09:21Mom turned briskly
09:22and pulled the door closed again.
09:23I hovered beside my body,
09:26staring at the crimson light
09:27in the darkness.
09:28A sorrow deeper than death
09:30filling me.
09:31Mom, if you had just taken
09:33one step closer,
09:35just touched my hand,
09:36you would have known
09:37I was already cold.
09:38But you didn't.
09:40You trusted that cold machine
09:42more than the daughter
09:43you carried for ten months.
09:45Late at night,
09:45a rat crawled out
09:46from the empty cabinet.
09:48I used to be terrified of rats.
09:50I would scream
09:51every time I saw one.
09:53But now,
09:54I could only float
09:55near the ceiling
09:56and watch it roam freely
09:57over my corpse.
09:59I tried to shoo it away
10:00weakly,
10:00but no sound came out.
10:02The rat bit into my toe,
10:04dark purplish blood
10:05seeping out.
10:06I couldn't feel any pain.
10:08That was good.
10:09It finally
10:10didn't hurt anymore.
10:11I spoke to the pitiful
10:13shell below me.
10:14Don't be afraid.
10:15You can't feel pain anymore.
10:17It will all be over soon.
10:19The next morning,
10:20sunlight washed over
10:22my corpse,
10:23but it brought
10:24no warmth at all.
10:25Clattering sounds
10:27drifted in
10:28from the kitchen.
10:29Mom was
10:30making breakfast.
10:32The rich smell
10:33of frying bacon
10:35and eggs
10:35crept through the crack
10:37under my door.
10:38Normally,
10:39that was the smell
10:40I craved the most,
10:41but I was only ever
10:43allowed plain oatmeal
10:45because Mom said
10:47liars didn't deserve
10:48good food.
10:49Today,
10:50she was deliberately
10:51banging the spatula
10:53against the pan.
10:54I knew exactly
10:55what she was doing.
10:56She was trying
10:57to tempt me.
10:58She wanted me
10:59to give in
11:00to the hunger
11:01and crawl out
11:01to beg for forgiveness.
11:04In the past,
11:05I might have actually
11:06confessed to
11:08things I never did
11:10just for a single
11:11bite of food.
11:12But now,
11:13I didn't need
11:13to eat anymore.
11:14Lily still hasn't
11:15come out?
11:16Dad asked.
11:17Reading the newspaper
11:18at the dining table?
11:20No.
11:21Stubborn as a mule.
11:22She's just spoiled.
11:24If she doesn't
11:25want to eat,
11:26she can starve.
11:27Mia took a sip
11:27of her milk,
11:28her eyes darting
11:30around mischievously.
11:31She intentionally
11:33ran over to my door.
11:35Mom!
11:35It smells so gross
11:37in Lily's room!
11:38Did she use the floor
11:39as a toilet?
11:40Floating by the door,
11:42I looked at my sister
11:43with a bitter smile.
11:45I had already started
11:46to smell after
11:47just one night.
11:48Mom marched over,
11:50her forehead deeply
11:51wrinkled in disgust.
11:53You actually soiled
11:55your own room?
11:56She pounded on the door
11:58and roared.
12:01You are unbelievable!
12:03You throw away
12:04your own dignity
12:05just to throw
12:06a tantrum at me?
12:07It reminded me
12:08of when I was little.
12:10Once,
12:11I had severe
12:12stomach flu
12:13and couldn't make it
12:14to the bathroom
12:15in time,
12:16messing my pants.
12:17She pointed at me
12:18and told the neighbors,
12:20Look at this child,
12:21dirty as a pig.
12:23And now,
12:24she thought
12:25I was being filthy again.
12:28Just leave her!
12:29Mom waved her hand
12:31in disgust,
12:31like shooing away a fly.
12:33Let her sit
12:34in her own stitch.
12:35See how she likes it.
12:37Dad put down his paper.
12:39The smell really
12:40is getting strong.
12:41Let me go check on her.
12:42Maybe a rat died
12:43in the walls.
12:44He stood up
12:46and walked
12:47toward my bedroom door.
12:49My ghost heart
12:50leaped into my throat.
12:52Dad,
12:53hurry!
12:54Open the door!
12:55Please,
12:56look at me.
12:57I'm right behind
12:59the door.
13:00If you just
13:01turn that knob,
13:02you'll see
13:03I'm not moving anymore.
13:05You'll see
13:06my face
13:07has already
13:08turned bruised
13:09and dark.
13:09Dad's hand
13:10grasped
13:11the doorknob.
13:12His phone
13:13suddenly blared.
13:14What?
13:14It was his boss
13:15calling.
13:16The servers crashed?
13:17Okay, okay,
13:18I'm on my way.
13:20Honey,
13:21there's a massive
13:22emergency at work.
13:22I have to go.
13:23I might not be back
13:24for a few days.
13:25Wait,
13:25what about Lily?
13:26I froze
13:27in midair.
13:29It was
13:29so incredibly
13:31close.
13:32Just one
13:33second away.
13:34If that call
13:35had come
13:36just a moment
13:37later,
13:38they would have
13:39found me.
13:40Maybe then
13:41I wouldn't have
13:42to keep
13:42rotting in here.
13:44That afternoon,
13:45Mom took
13:46Mia out shopping,
13:47leaving my corpse
13:48alone in the house.
13:49They came back
13:50in the evening.
13:51As soon as
13:52they walked in,
13:53the stench
13:53hit them
13:54even harder.
13:55Are you trying
13:56to turn this house
13:57into a literal dumpster?
13:58Instead,
13:59she grabbed
13:59a roll of duct tape,
14:01crouched down,
14:02and viciously
14:03sealed the crack
14:03under my door tight.
14:05Since you love
14:05the stench so much,
14:06you can just sit in it!
14:07Mom dusted off
14:08her hands in satisfaction.
14:10Finally,
14:11some peace and quiet.
14:12Watching that
14:13duct tape door,
14:14the very last
14:15shred of hope
14:16in my heart
14:17suffocated
14:18right along
14:18with the seal.
14:19So this was it.
14:21In Mom's mind,
14:22my life and death
14:23mattered
14:24even less
14:25than a fancy dinner.
14:26She would rather
14:27seal me in
14:28like a tomb
14:28than check
14:29if I was
14:29actually dying inside.
14:31You win, Mom.
14:32I will never
14:33bother you again.
14:34By the morning
14:35of the third day,
14:36the warm winter sun
14:38spilled into
14:38the living room,
14:39but it couldn't
14:40dispel the dark
14:42gloom hanging
14:42over the house.
14:44The thermostat
14:45was cranked
14:45way up to
14:46almost 80 degrees.
14:48The duct tape
14:49could no longer
14:50hold back
14:51the smell.
14:52It was
14:54a nauseating,
14:56thick,
14:56greasy stench
14:58of decay.
14:59Mom was trimming
15:00fresh flowers
15:01she had just bought,
15:02but no matter
15:03how strong
15:04the floral scent
15:04was,
15:05it couldn't mask
15:06the smell
15:07of a rotting corpse.
15:08Mom angrily
15:10snapped a rose stem,
15:12letting a thorn
15:13prick her finger.
15:15She had finally
15:17reached her
15:18breaking point.
15:19In her twisted logic,
15:21me not showering,
15:23using the room
15:24as a toilet
15:25or even hiding
15:27dead rats in there.
15:29It was all
15:29just an act
15:30of rebellion
15:31to disgust her
15:32and challenge
15:32her authority.
15:33Lily,
15:34you are completely
15:35out of control.
15:37Mom stormed
15:39into the kitchen,
15:40grabbed a heavy
15:41wooden spoon,
15:42and marched
15:43furiously
15:43toward my room.
15:45Since the shock
15:46collar isn't
15:47working anymore,
15:48maybe you need
15:49some old-fashioned
15:51discipline!
15:52Floating right
15:53in front of her,
15:54looking at her
15:55contorted,
15:56furious face,
15:57I waved my hands
15:58frantically
15:59to stop her.
16:01Don't go in!
16:02Mom, please don't!
16:04I look awful!
16:05I'm rotting!
16:06You'll be scared!
16:08Even though
16:08she didn't love me,
16:10I still didn't want
16:11her to see me
16:11in such a horrific state.
16:14But she walked
16:16right through my spirit
16:17and viciously ripped
16:19the duct tape
16:20off the door frame.
16:21The sound of the
16:22adhesive tearing
16:23was piercing.
16:25She jammed the
16:26spare key
16:27into the lock
16:28and twisted.
16:29The door
16:30was violently
16:32shoved open.
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